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Lord Ludikrous posted:What the gently caress does stay alert even mean? Stay alert for what? It means "go to work today but don't blame us when your granny dies" 11th May 1812, Prime Minister Spencer Perceval is shot dead in the lobby of the House of Commons.
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May 11, 2020 08:24
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Perhaps they should build the new parliament building with the benches two handgun ranges apart. Would also help with social distancing.
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May 11, 2020 08:30
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Lord Ludikrous posted:What the gently caress does stay alert even mean? Stay alert for what? Here's the deal. The amount you stay at home can be quantified; the amount you stay alert cannot. So when someone obeys the government instruction to stay home and gets sick anyway, the instruction was not sufficient and there's evidence to that effect. But if someone follows the instruction to stay alert and gets sick anyway, then they didn't follow the instruction well enough and they can't prove that they did. It's a blame transference exercise, nothing more.
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May 11, 2020 08:39
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My office gave us all the day off today anyway, a while ago. I wonder if they knew there was gonna be some clusterfuck announcement that confuses everyone (one of our guys is in the sage group)
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May 11, 2020 08:47
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If Johnson had any shred of decency/humanity left in him, he should resign when this is over. I know he won't because he likes being Prime Minister too much.
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May 11, 2020 08:47
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Catzilla posted:If Johnson had any shred of decency/humanity left in him, he should resign when this is over. I know he won't because he likes being Prime Minister too much. You think that he's still enjoying being PM?
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May 11, 2020 08:50
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It's probably not about whether he enjoys it anymore and more about not letting Michael Gove have it.
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May 11, 2020 08:52
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On the change from “Stay at home” to “Stay alert”. BBC is just interviewing the likes of Sturgeon and Mayor after Mayor who are all saying “this is the first we’ve heard of it, we’re against it. Stay at home.”
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May 11, 2020 08:53
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Angrymog posted:You think that he's still enjoying being PM? He thinks it's his god given right and purpose. Enjoyment is secondary (as long as he still gets his coke and booze every few days which he definitely is).
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May 11, 2020 08:57
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So Raab now clarifying that it's Wednesday we're all supposed to trot off back to work, not today. Meanwhile: https://twitter.com/BBCTomEdwards/status/1259735185303711745
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May 11, 2020 09:00
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https://twitter.com/richard_littler/status/1259745801200381952?s=19
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May 11, 2020 09:05
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Someone in the comments is saying to follow up watching it with Threads. I was in HMV a few months ago, and some shelf-stacker had put together a cheery double-bill of WtWB and Grave of the Fireflies.
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May 11, 2020 09:10
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The only commonality between Threads and the current government handling of the COVID-19 epidemic is that they were both written by loving idiots who care more about their team winning than science.
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May 11, 2020 09:13
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OwlFancier posted:Perhaps they should build the new parliament building with the benches two handgun ranges apart. Hold it in the Excel, we're still paying rent on it until October.
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May 11, 2020 09:14
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Bardeh posted:So Raab now clarifying that it's Wednesday we're all supposed to trot off back to work, not today. I looked at the replies  
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May 11, 2020 09:19
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If earth's a plane then why are they telling us to stop flying 
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May 11, 2020 09:24
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Bardeh posted:So Raab now clarifying that it's Wednesday we're all supposed to trot off back to work, not today.
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May 11, 2020 09:28
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Guavanaut posted:If earth's a plane then why are they telling us to stop flying Earth's a plane and life is like, just one big contrail maaaaaan
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May 11, 2020 09:32
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Flayer posted:Second spike incoming. You can't look at that picture and think the future holds anything else. Let's just hope it's a really hot summer and the whole coronavirus doesn't spread as much in the heat thing is true... Considering the way cases in Egypt are rocketing up, I don't think the 'heat' thing is true. If there is anything to it, I suspect it has more to do with colds and flu being less prevalent in the summer so people's immune systems may be a bit stronger to cope with it if caught. (Caveat: I am not the useful kind of Dr).
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May 11, 2020 09:32
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Hot weather doesn't seem to be any sort of deterrent. People will no doubt point to the slow spread of COVID in Africa, but you have to consider their relative air-travel isolation, sparse population on most of the continent, experience with Ebola and other outbreaks, and the fact that only something like 4% of the African demographic are 65+ (as opposed to 20-25% in the West). Lagos is gonna get hit hard as gently caress pretty soon
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May 11, 2020 09:38
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Guavanaut posted:If earth's a plane then why are they telling us to stop flying Ohmigod, clearly the world is a vampire sent to drain
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May 11, 2020 09:39
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Imagine being an ITU nurse/doctor seeing that picture just as your unit has started to get on top of things. Must be like a punch to the loving gut.
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May 11, 2020 09:39
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The government was very clear that you should avoid public transport. Because of course the only reason anyone takes public transport is for fun, we can actually all just get the ministerial car instead.
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May 11, 2020 09:41
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ONS report is out: Coronavirus (COVID-19) related deaths by occupation, England and Wales: deaths registered up to and including 20 April 2020quote:1.Main points
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May 11, 2020 09:43
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Bobstar posted:I looked at the replies Stay Alert! Eat Dirt! and maybe we will get through this
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May 11, 2020 09:44
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God if the trade warehouse I work in is going to call me back in and start letting customers in I'm loving dead. I haven't stopped freaking out all morning! And the branch group chat is full of people begging to come back to work! This is literally Hell!
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May 11, 2020 09:44
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https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-52611466quote:In England at least, if you work in construction or manufacturing, or can't do your job from home, you'll be encouraged to go back to work as long as you can keep your distance from others this week. just plain loving wrong laura, you've inserted a conditional "should go to work as long as it's safe" when it's actually an aspirational statement that you "must go to work, which we hope will be safe" quote:We said that you should work from home if you can, and only go to work if you must. We now need to stress that anyone who can’t work from home, for instance those in construction or manufacturing, should be actively encouraged to go to work.
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May 11, 2020 09:47
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CGI Stardust posted:It's true! And this is why I will make available to you, the perceptive ones, my patented Dirt Pills, containing all the bacteria and viruses the body needs to keep the immune system in fighting shape, for only £4.99 a box. (Buy 3 and get a FREE bottle of patented original Dirt Linament) I love the many benefits of dirt pills, but find the taste disagreeable. Do you perhaps offer some kind of dirt poultice or, better yet, suppository?
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May 11, 2020 09:48
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OwlFancier posted:The government was very clear that you should avoid public transport. It's certainly a "let them eat cake" moment. Except this time the nobles are also realising it.
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May 11, 2020 09:51
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big scary monsters posted:I love the many benefits of dirt pills, but find the taste disagreeable. Do you perhaps offer some kind of dirt poultice or, better yet, suppository? Anything can be a suppository if you're brave enough.
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May 11, 2020 09:52
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goddamnedtwisto posted:Anything can be a suppository if you're brave enough. Powerful Jose energy in this post
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May 11, 2020 09:55
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Failed Imagineer posted:Hot weather doesn't seem to be any sort of deterrent. I dunno, Nigeria (and Lagos specifically) are pretty hot poo poo when it comes to viral outbreaks. They kicked rear end during the Ebola outbreak: https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-did-nigeria-quash-its-ebola-outbreak-so-quickly/ quote:"Authors of a paper published October 9 in Eurosurveillance attribute Nigeria's success in "avoiding a far worse scenario" to its "quick and forceful" response. The authors point to three key elements in the country's attack:
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May 11, 2020 09:58
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OwlFancier posted:The government was very clear that you should avoid public transport. Jedit posted:It's certainly a "let them eat cake" moment. Except this time the nobles are also realising it.  
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May 11, 2020 10:00
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So apparently BJ isn't doing a press conference today, but taking questions from the public. I did the lol at this from the Graun liveblog quote:Of course there is nothing wrong with politicians doing Q&As with members of the public. Sometimes they pose harder or more interesting questions than journalists. But normally they don’t, and if you believe that it’s beneficial having a media that holds politicians to account, you might be concerned about Johnson avoiding the press on the day of such a major government announcement. 1. So salty, very boohoo 2. Yes it's definitely that the public are bad at asking questions, because they haven't been to super secret journalism spy school, and not that the government selects only questions in the form "Dear Strongbad, how is it that you're so awesome and cool? Did it come naturally, or were you born that way?"
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May 11, 2020 10:01
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OwlFancier posted:The government was very clear that you should avoid public transport. France has mandated masks on the metro and set up cycle routes that follow the metro lines. But now that the frogs have done it, we have to do something else, such as be complete loving idiots
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May 11, 2020 10:02
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Dear Boris, how do you type with ham hocks for hands? Crapfully yours, David
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May 11, 2020 10:03
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big scary monsters posted:I love the many benefits of dirt pills, but find the taste disagreeable. Do you perhaps offer some kind of dirt poultice or, better yet, suppository?
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May 11, 2020 10:03
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Bobstar posted:1. So salty, very boohoo How do you Brexit with boxing gloves on? <DELETED> 
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May 11, 2020 10:04
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JeremoudCorbynejad posted:France has mandated masks on the metro and set up cycle routes that follow the metro lines. We will also set up cycle routes that follow the underground. Through the tunnels. While the trains are running.
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May 11, 2020 10:09
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quote:Now take a step back: The concrete first steps Johnson announced last night were really about a change in tone rather than a loosening of existing rules. “Unlimited” exercise sounds great — except that despite the PM saying on 23 March that we’d be allowed just “one form of exercise a day” there never were any regulations about how often you could go out and exercise. Getting construction firms back to work is all well and good — except they were never told to stop working in the first place. And— newsflash from north London — people have been sitting around in parks in ones and twos, safely and socially distanced, for weeks. The big picture story from last night is that the U.K. is now seven long weeks into lockdown, and yet the PM is still unable to give a firm date for schools, ‘non-essential’ shops, cafes, pubs, restaurants or indoor leisure facilities to reopen. This, it’s fair to say, is not a good sign. hmm the old plans were based on Test and Trace being able to scale sufficiently, but even low targets have been missed. So instead of "lockdown's over chaps, we're switching to test and trace now" we get a tentative formalization of muddle can very definitely see how ministers could settle on advice to alter tone (on the basis that existing "policy" as understood has been generated from people reading into statements)
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May 11, 2020 10:12
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