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forkboy84
Jun 13, 2012

Corgis love bread. And Puro


Lord Ludikrous posted:

What the gently caress does stay alert even mean? Stay alert for what?

It means "go to work today but don't blame us when your granny dies"

11th May 1812, Prime Minister Spencer Perceval is shot dead in the lobby of the House of Commons.

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OwlFancier
Aug 22, 2013

Perhaps they should build the new parliament building with the benches two handgun ranges apart.

Would also help with social distancing.

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

Lord Ludikrous posted:

What the gently caress does stay alert even mean? Stay alert for what?

Is COVID19 like The Flood or something where you have to stay alert lest you get overwhelmed by a swarm of infection forms?

For what it’s worth at my job they’ve said nothing has changed for now. Furloughed staff are still furloughed and those working from home will continue to do so. Traffic was dead coming in this morning but will see how that changes.

Here's the deal. The amount you stay at home can be quantified; the amount you stay alert cannot. So when someone obeys the government instruction to stay home and gets sick anyway, the instruction was not sufficient and there's evidence to that effect. But if someone follows the instruction to stay alert and gets sick anyway, then they didn't follow the instruction well enough and they can't prove that they did.

It's a blame transference exercise, nothing more.

Microplastics
Jul 6, 2007

:discourse:
It's what's for dinner.
My office gave us all the day off today anyway, a while ago. I wonder if they knew there was gonna be some clusterfuck announcement that confuses everyone (one of our guys is in the sage group)

Catzilla
May 12, 2003

"Untie the queen"


If Johnson had any shred of decency/humanity left in him, he should resign when this is over. I know he won't because he likes being Prime Minister too much.

Angrymog
Jan 30, 2012

Really Madcats

Catzilla posted:

If Johnson had any shred of decency/humanity left in him, he should resign when this is over. I know he won't because he likes being Prime Minister too much.

You think that he's still enjoying being PM?

The Deleter
May 22, 2010
It's probably not about whether he enjoys it anymore and more about not letting Michael Gove have it.

Red Oktober
May 24, 2006

wiggly eyes!



On the change from “Stay at home” to “Stay alert”. BBC is just interviewing the likes of Sturgeon and Mayor after Mayor who are all saying “this is the first we’ve heard of it, we’re against it. Stay at home.”

stev
Jan 22, 2013

Please be excited.



Angrymog posted:

You think that he's still enjoying being PM?

He thinks it's his god given right and purpose. Enjoyment is secondary (as long as he still gets his coke and booze every few days which he definitely is).

Bardeh
Dec 2, 2004

Fun Shoe
So Raab now clarifying that it's Wednesday we're all supposed to trot off back to work, not today.

Meanwhile:

https://twitter.com/BBCTomEdwards/status/1259735185303711745

Failed Imagineer
Sep 22, 2018
https://twitter.com/richard_littler/status/1259745801200381952?s=19

:ohdear:

Angrymog
Jan 30, 2012

Really Madcats


Someone in the comments is saying to follow up watching it with Threads. I was in HMV a few months ago, and some shelf-stacker had put together a cheery double-bill of WtWB and Grave of the Fireflies.

Guavanaut
Nov 27, 2009

Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998



Toilet Rascal
The only commonality between Threads and the current government handling of the COVID-19 epidemic is that they were both written by loving idiots who care more about their team winning than science.

goddamnedtwisto
Dec 31, 2004

If you ask me about the mole people in the London Underground, I WILL be forced to kill you
Fun Shoe

OwlFancier posted:

Perhaps they should build the new parliament building with the benches two handgun ranges apart.

Would also help with social distancing.

Hold it in the Excel, we're still paying rent on it until October.

Bobstar
Feb 8, 2006

KartooshFace, you are not responding efficiently!

Bardeh posted:

So Raab now clarifying that it's Wednesday we're all supposed to trot off back to work, not today.

Meanwhile:

https://twitter.com/BBCTomEdwards/status/1259735185303711745

I looked at the replies :sigh:

Guavanaut
Nov 27, 2009

Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998



Toilet Rascal
If earth's a plane then why are they telling us to stop flying :tinfoil:

Flayer
Sep 13, 2003

by Fluffdaddy
Buglord

Bardeh posted:

So Raab now clarifying that it's Wednesday we're all supposed to trot off back to work, not today.

Meanwhile:

https://twitter.com/BBCTomEdwards/status/1259735185303711745
Second spike incoming. You can't look at that picture and think the future holds anything else. Let's just hope it's a really hot summer and the whole coronavirus doesn't spread as much in the heat thing is true...

Microplastics
Jul 6, 2007

:discourse:
It's what's for dinner.

Guavanaut posted:

If earth's a plane then why are they telling us to stop flying :tinfoil:

Earth's a plane and life is like, just one big contrail maaaaaan

Jaeluni Asjil
Apr 18, 2018

Sorry I thought you were a landlord when I gave you your old avatar!

Flayer posted:

Second spike incoming. You can't look at that picture and think the future holds anything else. Let's just hope it's a really hot summer and the whole coronavirus doesn't spread as much in the heat thing is true...

Considering the way cases in Egypt are rocketing up, I don't think the 'heat' thing is true. If there is anything to it, I suspect it has more to do with colds and flu being less prevalent in the summer so people's immune systems may be a bit stronger to cope with it if caught. (Caveat: I am not the useful kind of Dr).

Failed Imagineer
Sep 22, 2018
Hot weather doesn't seem to be any sort of deterrent.

People will no doubt point to the slow spread of COVID in Africa, but you have to consider their relative air-travel isolation, sparse population on most of the continent, experience with Ebola and other outbreaks, and the fact that only something like 4% of the African demographic are 65+ (as opposed to 20-25% in the West).

Lagos is gonna get hit hard as gently caress pretty soon

forkboy84
Jun 13, 2012

Corgis love bread. And Puro


Guavanaut posted:

If earth's a plane then why are they telling us to stop flying :tinfoil:

Ohmigod, clearly the world is a vampire sent to drain

Bardeh
Dec 2, 2004

Fun Shoe
Imagine being an ITU nurse/doctor seeing that picture just as your unit has started to get on top of things. Must be like a punch to the loving gut.

OwlFancier
Aug 22, 2013

The government was very clear that you should avoid public transport.

Because of course the only reason anyone takes public transport is for fun, we can actually all just get the ministerial car instead.

Wiggly Wayne DDS
Sep 11, 2010
Probation
Can't post for 15 minutes!
ONS report is out: Coronavirus (COVID-19) related deaths by occupation, England and Wales: deaths registered up to and including 20 April 2020

quote:

1.Main points
A total of 2,494 deaths involving the coronavirus (COVID-19) in the working age population (those aged 20 to 64 years) of England and Wales were registered up to and including 20 April 2020.

Nearly two-thirds of these deaths were among men (1,612 deaths), with the rate of death involving COVID-19 being statistically higher in males, with 9.9 deaths per 100,000 compared with 5.2 deaths per 100,000 females (882 deaths).

Compared with the rate among people of the same sex and age in England and Wales, men working in the lowest skilled occupations had the highest rate of death involving COVID-19, with 21.4 deaths per 100,000 males (225 deaths); men working as security guards had one of the highest rates, with 45.7 deaths per 100,000 (63 deaths).

Men and women working in social care, a group including care workers and home carers, both had significantly raised rates of death involving COVID-19, with rates of 23.4 deaths per 100,000 males (45 deaths) and 9.6 deaths per 100,000 females (86 deaths).

Healthcare workers, including those with jobs such as doctors and nurses, were not found to have higher rates of death involving COVID-19 when compared with the rate among those whose death involved COVID-19 of the same age and sex in the general population.

Among men, a number of other specific occupations were found to have raised rates of death involving COVID-19, including: taxi drivers and chauffeurs (36.4 deaths per 100,000); bus and coach drivers (26.4 deaths per 100,000); chefs (35.9 deaths per 100,000); and sales and retail assistants (19.8 deaths per 100,000).

This analysis does not prove conclusively that the observed rates of death involving COVID-19 are necessarily caused by differences in occupational exposure; we adjusted for age, but not for other factors such as ethnic group and place of residence. We have also published an article that explores possible differences in occupation exposure to COVID-19.

CGI Stardust
Nov 7, 2010


Brexit is but a door,
election time is but a window.

I'll be back

Bobstar posted:

I looked at the replies :sigh:


It's true! And this is why I will make available to you, the perceptive ones, my patented Dirt Pills, containing all the bacteria and viruses the body needs to keep the immune system in fighting shape, for only £4.99 a box. (Buy 3 and get a FREE bottle of patented original Dirt Linament)

Stay Alert! Eat Dirt! and maybe we will get through this

bionic vapour boy
Feb 13, 2012

Impervious to fun.
God if the trade warehouse I work in is going to call me back in and start letting customers in I'm loving dead. I haven't stopped freaking out all morning! And the branch group chat is full of people begging to come back to work! This is literally Hell!

XMNN
Apr 26, 2008
I am incredibly stupid
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-52611466

quote:

In England at least, if you work in construction or manufacturing, or can't do your job from home, you'll be encouraged to go back to work as long as you can keep your distance from others this week.

just plain loving wrong laura, you've inserted a conditional "should go to work as long as it's safe" when it's actually an aspirational statement that you "must go to work, which we hope will be safe"

quote:

We said that you should work from home if you can, and only go to work if you must. We now need to stress that anyone who can’t work from home, for instance those in construction or manufacturing, should be actively encouraged to go to work.

And we want it to be safe for you to get to work. So you should avoid public transport if at all possible – because we must and will maintain social distancing, and capacity will therefore be limited. So work from home if you can, but you should go to work if you can’t work from home. And to ensure you are safe at work we have been working to establish new guidance for employers to make workplaces Covid-secure. And when you do go to work, if possible do so by car or even better by walking or bicycle. But just as with workplaces, public transport operators will also be following Covid-secure standards.

big scary monsters
Sep 2, 2011

-~Skullwave~-

CGI Stardust posted:

It's true! And this is why I will make available to you, the perceptive ones, my patented Dirt Pills, containing all the bacteria and viruses the body needs to keep the immune system in fighting shape, for only £4.99 a box. (Buy 3 and get a FREE bottle of patented original Dirt Linament)

Stay Alert! Eat Dirt! and maybe we will get through this

I love the many benefits of dirt pills, but find the taste disagreeable. Do you perhaps offer some kind of dirt poultice or, better yet, suppository?

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

OwlFancier posted:

The government was very clear that you should avoid public transport.

Because of course the only reason anyone takes public transport is for fun, we can actually all just get the ministerial car instead.

It's certainly a "let them eat cake" moment. Except this time the nobles are also realising it.

goddamnedtwisto
Dec 31, 2004

If you ask me about the mole people in the London Underground, I WILL be forced to kill you
Fun Shoe

big scary monsters posted:

I love the many benefits of dirt pills, but find the taste disagreeable. Do you perhaps offer some kind of dirt poultice or, better yet, suppository?

Anything can be a suppository if you're brave enough.

forkboy84
Jun 13, 2012

Corgis love bread. And Puro


goddamnedtwisto posted:

Anything can be a suppository if you're brave enough.

Powerful Jose energy in this post

Necrothatcher
Mar 26, 2005




Failed Imagineer posted:

Hot weather doesn't seem to be any sort of deterrent.

People will no doubt point to the slow spread of COVID in Africa, but you have to consider their relative air-travel isolation, sparse population on most of the continent, experience with Ebola and other outbreaks, and the fact that only something like 4% of the African demographic are 65+ (as opposed to 20-25% in the West).

Lagos is gonna get hit hard as gently caress pretty soon

I dunno, Nigeria (and Lagos specifically) are pretty hot poo poo when it comes to viral outbreaks. They kicked rear end during the Ebola outbreak:

https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-did-nigeria-quash-its-ebola-outbreak-so-quickly/

quote:

"Authors of a paper published October 9 in Eurosurveillance attribute Nigeria's success in "avoiding a far worse scenario" to its "quick and forceful" response. The authors point to three key elements in the country's attack:

Fast and thorough tracing of all potential contacts
Ongoing monitoring of all of these contacts
Rapid isolation of potentially infectious contacts

The swift battle was won not only with vigilant disinfecting, port-of-entry screening and rapid isolation but also with boot leather and lots and lots of in-person follow-up visits, completing 18,500 of them to find any new cases of Ebola among a total of 989 identified contacts."

Wiggly Wayne DDS
Sep 11, 2010
Probation
Can't post for 15 minutes!

OwlFancier posted:

The government was very clear that you should avoid public transport.

Because of course the only reason anyone takes public transport is for fun, we can actually all just get the ministerial car instead.

Jedit posted:

It's certainly a "let them eat cake" moment. Except this time the nobles are also realising it.

:thunk:

Bobstar
Feb 8, 2006

KartooshFace, you are not responding efficiently!

So apparently BJ isn't doing a press conference today, but taking questions from the public.

I did the lol at this from the Graun liveblog

quote:

Of course there is nothing wrong with politicians doing Q&As with members of the public. Sometimes they pose harder or more interesting questions than journalists. But normally they don’t, and if you believe that it’s beneficial having a media that holds politicians to account, you might be concerned about Johnson avoiding the press on the day of such a major government announcement.

1. So salty, very boohoo
2. Yes it's definitely that the public are bad at asking questions, because they haven't been to super secret journalism spy school, and not that the government selects only questions in the form "Dear Strongbad, how is it that you're so awesome and cool? Did it come naturally, or were you born that way?"

Microplastics
Jul 6, 2007

:discourse:
It's what's for dinner.

OwlFancier posted:

The government was very clear that you should avoid public transport.

Because of course the only reason anyone takes public transport is for fun, we can actually all just get the ministerial car instead.

France has mandated masks on the metro and set up cycle routes that follow the metro lines.

But now that the frogs have done it, we have to do something else, such as be complete loving idiots

The Deleter
May 22, 2010
Dear Boris, how do you type with ham hocks for hands?

Crapfully yours,
David

CGI Stardust
Nov 7, 2010


Brexit is but a door,
election time is but a window.

I'll be back

big scary monsters posted:

I love the many benefits of dirt pills, but find the taste disagreeable. Do you perhaps offer some kind of dirt poultice or, better yet, suppository?
Indeed we do! We offer a one-size-fits-all Dirt Suppository generic, at the lower end of our price range, although I sense that perhaps you are... a little more discerning, somewhat exact, only wanting the best? Fear not! Pass by our local branch today, for a FREE suppository fitting session, and we can send you custom-moulded suppositories, for the best, most comfortable, healthy mornings (monthly subscriptions are available; variety box available on request for all 3+ month subscribers)

Guavanaut
Nov 27, 2009

Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998



Toilet Rascal

Bobstar posted:

1. So salty, very boohoo
2. Yes it's definitely that the public are bad at asking questions, because they haven't been to super secret journalism spy school, and not that the government selects only questions in the form "Dear Strongbad, how is it that you're so awesome and cool? Did it come naturally, or were you born that way?"
Dear Boris,

How do you Brexit with boxing gloves on?

<DELETED>

OwlFancier
Aug 22, 2013

JeremoudCorbynejad posted:

France has mandated masks on the metro and set up cycle routes that follow the metro lines.

But now that the frogs have done it, we have to do something else, such as be complete loving idiots

We will also set up cycle routes that follow the underground. Through the tunnels. While the trains are running.

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ronya
Nov 8, 2010

I'm the normal one.

You hate ridden fucks will regret your words when you eventually grow up.

Peace.

quote:

Now take a step back: The concrete first steps Johnson announced last night were really about a change in tone rather than a loosening of existing rules. “Unlimited” exercise sounds great — except that despite the PM saying on 23 March that we’d be allowed just “one form of exercise a day” there never were any regulations about how often you could go out and exercise. Getting construction firms back to work is all well and good — except they were never told to stop working in the first place. And— newsflash from north London — people have been sitting around in parks in ones and twos, safely and socially distanced, for weeks. The big picture story from last night is that the U.K. is now seven long weeks into lockdown, and yet the PM is still unable to give a firm date for schools, ‘non-essential’ shops, cafes, pubs, restaurants or indoor leisure facilities to reopen. This, it’s fair to say, is not a good sign.

https://www.politico.eu/newsletter/london-playbook/politico-london-playbook-unlocking-down-you-lead-i-furlough-daves-chicken-run/

hmm

the old plans were based on Test and Trace being able to scale sufficiently, but even low targets have been missed. So instead of "lockdown's over chaps, we're switching to test and trace now" we get a tentative formalization of muddle

can very definitely see how ministers could settle on advice to alter tone (on the basis that existing "policy" as understood has been generated from people reading into statements)

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