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Grow plants all day but it won't put the galleons in your pockets like working in the department of magical warcrimes.
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# ? Jun 11, 2024 02:39 |
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Can you imagine the weed they could grow, though?![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
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The series should have stayed whimsical because its core premise is incompatible with serious examination
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dialhforhero posted:Can you imagine the weed they could grow, though? What do you think Hufflepuff kids were doing at the greenhouse all day? You never see them around because they're in the kitchens with then munchies or out behind the hedges Huffing the Puff.
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No weed is mentioned in these books, yet two of our "heroes" peddle legal date rape drugs in their candy and jokes store
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I always got that the prophecy was a kind of self fulfilling thing. If Voldemort just ignored it then he would have been fine but he's a big bitch who's too scared of dying to leave it alone.
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I haven’t read them since I was a kid so maybe I’m forgetting some nuance but “terror of death and refusal to accept it” always seemed like a weird motivation in a universe where everyone knows for a fact that there’s an afterlife and schoolkids are on a first-name basis with like 6 ghosts. Maybe he’s scared of going to Wizard Hell
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Chuck Buried Treasure posted:I haven’t read them since I was a kid so maybe I’m forgetting some nuance but “terror of death and refusal to accept it” always seemed like a weird motivation in a universe where everyone knows for a fact that there’s an afterlife and schoolkids are on a first-name basis with like 6 ghosts. No one really knows what the afterlife is though, just that when you die you get a choice to go somewhere or stay on as a ghost. And existence as a ghost is existentially horrifying based on how Rowling wrote everything to do with Nearly Headless Nick, the Grey Lady, and Binns.
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Are the pictures alive or just animated? This is important.
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FunkyAl posted:Are the pictures alive or just animated? This is important. They seem to share some memories, at least the Headmaster Portraits do.
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Didn't Neville's great aunt or something throw him out a window because he was late bloomer when it came to his magic and he happened to bounce 6 feet in the air off across the yard like a basket ball instead of dying? Wizard childhood most loving blow while your family is waiting to see if your a squib.
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Quote is not edit.
Caidin fucked around with this message at 03:21 on May 15, 2020 |
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Sleeveless posted:It's a decent attempt at trying to reconcile how problematic Chosen One narratives are by making it so that there was nothing intrinsically special about Harry. Aside from his family's wealth and privelege of course, but even then Neville covercomes all that to basically be Harry's equal and carrying on his work at Hogwarts in the final book. Did the books ever say where all the money came from? Were the Potters just rich as gently caress and Harry's the last of them? I don't remember them ever talking about James's family.
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Some Goon posted:Did the books ever say where all the money came from? Were the Potters just rich as gently caress and Harry's the last of them? I don't remember them ever talking about James's family. It doesn't directly though you do see that James is a spoiled rich kid growing up and we know the Evans were not rich. JKR said in supplemental materials that the Potters were a poor pureblood family until his Grandfather invented the wizard equivalent of hair gel which was so popular they became like multi-millionaires off of it.
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Sleeveless posted:It's a decent attempt at trying to reconcile how problematic Chosen One narratives are by making it so that there was nothing intrinsically special about Harry. Aside from his family's wealth and privelege of course, but even then Neville covercomes all that to basically be Harry's equal and carrying on his work at Hogwarts in the final book. The movies got so lucky that Neville's actor grew perfectly from a round-cheeked doofus to a goddamn action hero Butternubs posted:I always got that the prophecy was a kind of self fulfilling thing. If Voldemort just ignored it then he would have been fine but he's a big bitch who's too scared of dying to leave it alone. It also comes up in a later book as Harry and Dumbledore are searching for Horcruxes, Harry suggests he might have just made a random rock in a quarry a Horcrux and no one would ever find it, but Dumbledore says the thing is Voldemort is a massive egomaniac and drama queen who would never make a Hocrux out of an object that wasn't unique and special.
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reignofevil posted:That candy wrapper was a horcrux.
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The sorting hat has no loving clue what House someone would actually be best in and has just been bluffing for several centuries because theres not a lot of employment opportunities for sentient hats
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Is the sorting hat sentient? does it just sit in a cupboard 364 days a year? is it's life a living hell? going by what we know of the HP universe the answer to all these is probably yes.
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Butternubs posted:Is the sorting hat sentient? does it just sit in a cupboard 364 days a year? is it's life a living hell? going by what we know of the HP universe the answer to all these is probably yes. It is and it hangs out on a pedestal in the Headmaster's office. At one point we see a memory of Dumbledore talking to it to try to make sure Harry hadn't been possessed by Voldemort during his first year.
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Its just standard cold-reading tactics. Like horoscopes or fortune-telling. Everybody's ambitious sometimes or will show flashes of courage so you just make up some bullshit about it and people will think about the times they were briefly brave when they wonder why they got stuck in Gryffindor. The fact that everybody just assumes that Ron and Neville are in Gryffindor instead of Hufflepuff or Hermionie isn't in Ravenclaw because of some deep unseen aspect of their character instead of the fact that the talking hat might not know what the gently caress he's talking about makes me think that wizards would be an extremely easy people to scam.
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Yeah it chills in the headmaster’s office in open air on a hat stand and sits there like a useless oval office.
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Butternubs posted:Is the sorting hat sentient? does it just sit in a cupboard 364 days a year? is it's life a living hell? going by what we know of the HP universe the answer to all these is probably yes. here's a list of all 578 fanfictions tagged with the character Sorting Hat so if you read all of those you'll probably get a good sense of what it's up to
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VanSandman posted:They seem to share some memories, at least the Headmaster Portraits do. What does that mean though? Are they like horcruxes? Who is speaking, the person being painted, the artist, or is the painting its own entity?
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BIG FLUFFY DOG posted:Its just standard cold-reading tactics. Like horoscopes or fortune-telling. Everybody's ambitious sometimes or will show flashes of courage so you just make up some bullshit about it and people will think about the times they were briefly brave when they wonder why they got stuck in Gryffindor. The fact that everybody just assumes that Ron and Neville are in Gryffindor instead of Hufflepuff or Hermionie isn't in Ravenclaw because of some deep unseen aspect of their character instead of the fact that the talking hat might not know what the gently caress he's talking about makes me think that wizards would be an extremely easy people to scam. Gilderoy Lockhart exists so you're correcf
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FunkyAl posted:What does that mean though? Are they like horcruxes? Who is speaking, the person being painted, the artist, or is the painting its own entity? The painting of Dumbledore says it's its own entity that has some, but not all of Dumbledore's memories and experiences. It's like someone caught a snapshot of their personality that now has to exist in a painting for all time.
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The Sorting Hat is basically a phrenologist.
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Zore posted:The painting of Dumbledore says it's its own entity that has some, but not all of Dumbledore's memories and experiences. Maybe it comes down to the skill of the painter. Like if the Van Gogh of the wizarding world does your portrait then it acts and sounds just like you and has most of your memories. But if you're finger painted by a hufflepuff then it probably just screams all the time and begs for death.
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I assume it works like the wizarding equivalent of those gravestones that are just highlight clip reels of the deceased. So theyll be a mess of what everyone remembers but miss a lot of the nuance. It would make the Michael Jordan painting significantly less of an rear end in a top hat, is what Im saying
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Just so everyone knows an enchanted painting that is a conglomerate of what everyone remembers of me is how I'll still be modding this place 1000 years from now.
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reignofevil posted:Just so everyone knows an enchanted painting that is a conglomerate of what everyone remembers of me is how I'll still be modding this place 1000 years from now. thia is like some sort of roko's forum mod like why would you do this to something that is in any sense yourself im not sure it's different from just being a mod in the first place though
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I wonder how messed up the wizard paintings made of extant wizard painting are. Is it like a decaying VHS tape or is it just like one dumbledore looping forever through the one conversation topic it knows like bonzai buddy with alzheimers?
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Butternubs posted:Maybe it comes down to the skill of the painter. Like if the Van Gogh of the wizarding world does your portrait then it acts and sounds just like you and has most of your memories. But if you're finger painted by a hufflepuff then it probably just screams all the time and begs for death. There's a strong possibility the van gogh would be the one screaming and the finger painting would be chill and well
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is it possible that harry potter and twin peaks take place in the same world
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instead of an insular culture of boarding school dipshits, american magic is woodland goobers and mega-goon fbi guys
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I get the impression the paintings are kinda like that Hologram in I Robot with Will Smith. It was an algorithm that responded to the person speaking to it like it was a real person, but then you would say something it couldn't process and it responded with something like "I'm sorry but my programming can't properly respond to your statement".
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reignofevil posted:Just so everyone knows an enchanted painting that is a conglomerate of what everyone remembers of me is how I'll still be modding this place 1000 years from now. A mod who posts entirely in Markov chain (including probe/ban text)? I think we finally have found a mod who won't get burnt out down the line.
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I feel like the "Harry becomes a cop" ending is fundamentally opposed to the "Harry decides to never get in a fight again so that the Death Wand lineage is forever broken" ending.
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Rowling wanted Terry Gilliam for the movies, and you know what he'd have made something interesting out of that.
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Speleothing posted:I feel like the "Harry becomes a cop" ending is fundamentally opposed to the "Harry decides to never get in a fight again so that the Death Wand lineage is forever broken" ending. No no, its fine, Harry realized he just needs to avoid fights where the other person can fight back.
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# ? Jun 11, 2024 02:39 |
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Barudak posted:No no, its fine, Harry realized he just needs to avoid fights where the other person can fight back. And so began Harry Potter's long career of challenging babies to magical duels.
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