BONGHITZ posted:

Dolphin posted:

My test came back positive. I got the vid!

I got the covid!

Covid19 baby!!

RIGHTEOUS!!

Thoguh posted:

If that's real then we all just need to go hang out at that prison because that would mean the chance of getting seriously sick if you aren't 80 is like 1% and the chance of death is like. 001%. Which makes me think that was lovely testing unless this thing is quickly becoming very, very much less lethal than it was a few months ago.

Dolphin posted:

My test came back positive. I got the vid!

I got the covid!

Covid19 baby!!

RIGHTEOUS!!

Dolphin posted:

My test came back positive. I got the vid!

I got the covid!

Covid19 baby!!

RIGHTEOUS!!

facetoucher cat posted:

https://twitter.com/wsbtv/status/1263105247951519755

Knight posted:

Jo Ann De La Muerte

Ursine Catastrophe posted:

grats on the future immuno-privilege, try not to die

Dolphin posted:

well that would suck, id get a perma

Dolphin posted:

My test came back positive. I got the vid!

I got the covid!

Covid19 baby!!

RIGHTEOUS!!

Dolphin posted:

I was in a grocery line with a dude who kept pulling his mask off his face to cough last week. I think that douchebag might have done it.

IBroughttheFunk posted:

It's okay everyone. We actually already have a miracle drug that is going to make everything all better.

https://twitter.com/willsommer/status/1263089354077020166

Grey Fox posted:

stay safe, can you monitor your oxygen saturation at all?

Dolphin posted:

My test came back positive. I got the vid!

I got the covid!

Covid19 baby!!

RIGHTEOUS!!

Dolphin posted:

well that would suck, id get a perma

Dolphin posted:

My test came back positive. I got the vid!

I got the covid!

Covid19 baby!!

RIGHTEOUS!!

Rynn posted:

There are people who own Jeeps and then there are Jeep People.

I loving hate Jeep People with a fiery passion

is pepsi ok posted:

Hey guess what, I'm gonna GO TOPLESS this weekend.

heh heh that's just what us Jeep People call riding around with the top down. Only In a Jeep, amiright?

IBroughttheFunk posted:

It's okay everyone. We actually already have a miracle drug that is going to make everything all better.

https://twitter.com/willsommer/status/1263089354077020166

Outrail posted:

I like a self correcting problem but this is going to have collateral damage. These shitgibbons are going to force their loved ones to eat bathtub medicine.

Dolphin posted:

I'm feeling mostly better but I'm just waiting for the cytokine storm to kick in and melt my brain and lungs

snoo posted:

starting to wonder if "hospitalized/icu cases going down" in MD is just bc they're loving dying

Mayor Dave posted:

Unless you're going to be hauling large amounts of stuff every day don't buy a truck holy poo poo

Bulgakov posted:

many americans have been raised and trained to mock with derision, in a very racist and reactionary style, cultures that make a siesta part of their daily routine


but a nice midday nap is such a loving great thing

Thesaurus posted:

https://twitter.com/DenverChannel/status/1262849029035065344?s=19

People are going apeshit now that they have been unleashed. Colorado doesn't have beaches, so everyone is swarming a frigid mountain creek to go tubing? For reference, this is many times more busy than I ever remember seeing it.

Mayor Dave posted:

Unless you're going to be hauling large amounts of stuff every day don't buy a truck holy poo poo

Mr Ice Cream Glove posted:

Next outbreak location

https://twitter.com/CNN/status/1262967823472766980

snoo posted:

I played old school runescape for a couple days

oxsnard posted:

Costco meltdown guy showed up on reddit and posted this before deleting his account

https://streamable.com/bhyldq

He runs a car detailing service in Denver and people are spamming it with negative reviews

oxsnard posted:

Costco meltdown guy showed up on reddit and posted this before deleting his account

https://streamable.com/bhyldq

He runs a car detailing service in Denver and people are spamming it with negative reviews

Dolphin posted:

My test came back positive. I got the vid!

I got the covid!

Covid19 baby!!

RIGHTEOUS!!

snoo posted:

I played old school runescape for a couple days

quote:

My boyfriend and I had met online well over 6 years ago through an online game by the name of RuneScape. He was 14 and I was 17, but it had felt like we had been friends forever. We both played the game very often and connected through it, eventually leading us to start a long-distance relationship. Things began to escalate as the years went on and we began seeing each other in person every few months or so. We were about 1,500 miles apart, so one of our main priorities for the future was moving in together and closing the distance. My job had prevented us from doing that, but we had finally set a date for me to move in with him in December of this year.

Our relationship never had any serious issues and I was more than happy to have him in my life as he was happy to have me. As I got older, I began to play RuneScape less and less, as work took up most of my time. He continued to play regularly, if not more than he had when I first met him. He could never really hold down a job and barely had an income, but I supported him throughout the years and even paid his rent from across the country after he moved out of his parents' house a few years ago. I never really minded it because he was a sweetheart, but we began to have problems.

In November of last year, I couldn't help pay his monthly rent. I was short on cash after having to pay my own living expenses alongside car repairs and bills I owed to the state, and I just couldn't afford to support him at the time. When I called him one night to discuss it, he freaked out and started crying that he didn't want to live with his parents again. I tried calming him down and even suggesting that I could help him find a temporary job until I could start providing for him again but he wasn't having it. He claimed his parents would abuse him if he returned home, which I know for a fact isn't true because him and his parents have stayed with me several times. They've given him the world. I eventually did calm him down but he remained passive-aggressive the entire night and we eventually hung up.

Because I cared about him, I reached out to his father the next day and informed him that he would probably be moving back home after his lease expired that month. I explained how I wouldn't be able to afford paying for his living for a month or two and if there were any local jobs he could work in order to... y'know, MAKE AN INCOME. Apparently, a friend of his father needed help managing a small warehouse for his business and was looking to potentially hire my boyfriend for the season. It paid $15/hr and was super easy (lifting boxes, sweeping the floors, and taking inventory).

I brought it up to my boyfriend that same night and he was not having it. Not only did he not want to work in a "lovely warehouse", but he didn't want to work at all. All he planned to do day in, day out was play RuneScape. I brought up a few other job listings I had found in his area and he immediately shot all of them down as well. He then had the audacity to comment about how he thinks I should work harder and possibly work a second job. I kept my composure and simply argued against it until we eventually hung up. I collapsed on my bed and cried for a good hour or two afterwards because of the intense emotional stress I was under. Not only do I work 8 hours a day, 6 days a week, I'm also an industrial meteorologist. If I remember correctly, that's a lot more work than playing RuneScape every day and using my Hulu account. I really considered breaking up with him right that moment, but I changed my mind and decided to give him another chance. Looking back on it, big mistake.

I messaged him throughout the night and we sort-of made up, but I was still a little uneasy about the entire event. He had moved back with his parents by the time December had come and I began to help him look for jobs while he wasted his life away playing video games. I eventually persuaded him to start working at a small retail store near his house and he thankfully began to make some money! I would still buy him video games and transfer him money like normal because I spoiled him, and our relationship began to feel somewhat okay again.

Last month, both him and I put our money together to fly him across the US to stay with me for 4 days. We hadn't seen each other in person since last summer, so we were both looking forward to it. He arrived and we had a great time for the first few days because he could actually take me on dates for once with his new income. Everything was perfect until I caught a glimpse of his phone's lock screen while he was taking a shower.

"When are you gonna leave herrrrr," the Discord message read.

I could have ran into the bathroom and snapped his neck in that moment but I kept myself together as best as I could without killing him. I had never felt so used, disrespected, or hated in my entire life. When he came out of the bathroom, I gave him a fake smile, but I genuinely hated him from that moment on. He could have dropped dead on the floor and I would have spit on him. I spent the remainer of the night watching him play RuneScape and I remained very quiet. He took notice of this and asked me if everything was okay, and I lied and told him I was fine. When it came time to go to sleep, I let that fucker climb into bed with me and he tried initiating sex because it was our final night together. I rejected as politely as I could without tearing his member completely off. He was disappointed, but went out like a light.

Immediately after he went to sleep, I reached over and unplugged his phone and started digging through his messages with that girl. I feared that I had misinterpreted the message I had seen, but I was completely right after all. Not only had he been cheating on me, he had been doing so for nearly six months; leading me to believe that he hooked up with another girl directly after I couldn't pay for his living in November. I scrolled through probably 100,000 messages and wanted to vomit my insides out by the end of it. He had talked poo poo about me, claimed I was emotionally abusive (just as he had done with his parents), and even sent this girl my nudes so they could pick me apart physically.

When morning came, I had slept in because of how late I was up reading his messages. I woke up to find him on my computer playing RuneScape and eating my food. It was like all of our relationship had been wiped from my mind and he was now an evil stranger sitting in my house. I wanted to scream at him, I wanted to tear him apart and kick him out of my house onto the street, but I didn't. In fact, I gave him as much love and attention as I could muster that morning because I wanted to leave things feeling normal between us. I dropped him off at the airport and we had a quick and somber goodbye before I left him forever, unbeknownst to him.

I drove back home as calmly as I could before crying my eyes out in a mix of complete anger and emotional pain. I ended up kicking my bedframe so hard that the wood split and I had to buy another one recently. If only it were his face. I wanted to break his heart by the time he arrived back home, but I wanted it to really hurt. I logged into our joint RuneScape account that we had made several years ago, where him and I would work on training the same account and raising it almost like our "baby". We had always joked that if we were to ever split up, he would take half of the account's bank contents and I would take the rest. I took my half and transferred it to my main account before taking his half and giving it away to random people throughout the game. Every last bit of it. Even items I couldn't normally trade away, I used a spell to convert the items into coins which I then gave away as well. The bank was now empty.

It then occurred to me that I had the credentials to his main account were written down in my desk, as he would frequently have me train his Farming skill every so often. I didn't hesitate at all and logged into his precious 14-year-old RuneScape account. I immediately took all of the contents of his bank and sold it all on the Grand Exchange, a marketplace in the game. It took an extremely long time to clear out his bank, but he would still be flying home for about another 4 hours so I had plenty of time. By the time I had sold/destroyed everything, I had four stacks of coins totalling over 8.5 billion. Now what to spend it on, hmm...

I wanted to waste his "life earnings" on the most useless, stupid thing I could think of, besides him. I logged back into my main account to reach out to a friend of mine that collects massive stacks of burnt food. For the unaware, burnt food in RuneScape has no use. You can't "unburn" them, eat them, or even sell them on the Grand Exchange. They are, however, tradable amongst players. I've always poked fun at this guy for collecting burnt food, but I was now more thankful than ever to make his acquaintance in my revenge. I asked him what the most obscure, unwanted item was of the burnt food variety was and he replied "Burnt spider". Lo and behold, he had roughly 6,000 of the item "Spider on shaft (burnt)" in his bank that he was willing to sell me. Feeling generous with my ex-boyfriend's coins, I gave my friend a full stack of 2.147 billion coins and left a very happy customer. I dropped the 6,083 burnt spiders in his bank, but still had about 6 billion coins left to spend.

With the remaining money, I decided to treat myself. I went onto the Grand Exchange and ended up going on a shopping spree! The first thing I bought were 100 bonds. If you're not familiar, a bond in RuneScape grants you 14 days of in-game Membership. After trading all 100 bonds to my account, I now have almost 4 years of Membership paid for me. I spent a majority of his coins on extremely nice armor and weapons, all of which went straight into my account. He still had about an extra billion, so I spent it on the supplies I needed to level up an expensive skill of mine. By the end of the afternoon, he was left with a measly 150,000 coins in his bank, all of which I gave away to a guy cooking pizzas outside of the Exchange. Nothing was left, so I decided to pick up a pile of bones off the ground and leave it solely in his bank. It might sound petty, but I laughed for a while.

Now, I know what you're thinking. This is so cruel, you ruined the tens of thousands of hours he had put into a game! Well, it was time he learned that I can be a bitch, a MEAN bitch. On top of spending every last coin he had ever made, I levelled his Defense skill. This may not sound bad; in fact, it sounds like a good thing! I helped his account progress, right? Well, no. Unfortunately for my ex, he had what players commonly refer to as a "pure" account: meaning he never, EVER dared to level his Defense skill from Level 1, in order to keep the lowest defense stats but have high offensive stats. Well, not anymore. Have fun with your permanent Level 6 Defense.

Cycling through hundreds of possible forms of revenge in my head, I settled on getting rid of his house. It's quite an achievement in RuneScape to have a nice house of your own, in fact, he had one of the nicest I had ever seen in the game. In order to have built it, he must have spent well over a few billion coins. Too bad I had disassembled it all in a matter of minutes, deleting it all into cyberspace. And there's no insurance either, he's going to have to rebuy everything with his non-existent money if he wants a new house. Bye bye, Casa de cheater.

Scrolling through his friends list, I decided to act as him and pay a visit to his friends who were currently online and admit that I had cheated on my girlfriend and was fully proud of it. If his friends hadn't removed him by that point, I removed them. All of them.

Lastly, to add a beautiful little cherry to this revenge-filled cake, I changed his username. You're able to change your username once a month on RuneScape, so I changed his to let everybody know that he's a dirty cheater. I obviously won't drop his username here, but I did the best I could to embarrass him with a 12 character limit. He should be able to reclaim his previous username in about three weeks, but if he waits too long, I'll be able to swipe it and slap it on a throwaway account of my own forever.

He sent me a very hateful and aggressive message later that night, followed by pictures of him crying. I wrote him a sincere message officially ending the relationship, while also scaring him away by threatening to "take him to court" over sharing my nudes and possibly filing a cease-and-desist if he were to contact me any time soon. I don't plan on doing any of that, I just don't want to speak to him ever again.

TL;DR: Boyfriend of 5 years that I had financially supported for everything decided to cheat on me and spread my nudes, I wasted his RuneScape riches on 6,000 dead spiders and completely trashed his 14+ years of effort, leaving him with nothing to show for but a shameful username.

EDIT: Wow, I really didn't expect this to blow up as much as it did lol. To clarify, this post is referring to Old School RuneScape rather than RuneScape 3. We met playing RS3 but immediately put all of our focus into Old School when it first released. He even transferred 90% of his RS3 worth over to Old School through bots and such, making this revenge even sweeter. So while his Old School account is only 6 years old, as is mine, his fortunes were the collective effort of a previous 8 years on RS3.

Thank you so much for the reddit gold, I don't know what to do with it but I'm glad I've given you a "revenge boner"!