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Zodiac5000
Jun 19, 2006

Protects the Pack!

Doctor Rope
1. A

Let's ask when the katamari arrives. I think it'll be a better opportunity.

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Runa
Feb 13, 2011

Tudiya has got me chuckling irl right now, this is a big play and I'm glad that by tempering our ambitions we got Tudiya relaxed enough to throw us a bone with the local politics angle.

the_steve
Nov 9, 2005

We're always hiring!

There Bias Two posted:

We should emphasize that this probably isn't a small cult, but a large one driven by demons on the scale of the Bnaimokt or fishmen.

My take is that their greatest strength is deception. The ones who lay low and play their cards right manage to accrue UNLIMITED POWAH, at least until some lucky idiot with magic sandals pastes you.

The ones who overplay their hand too early realize that their Bird Form sucks and then they die because we can hurl a boulder like a discus.

And hell, even that is probably according to keikaku because it not only culls the weak from Nusku's ranks, but downplays the threat they actually pose since "Hey, that idiot died like an idiot. They're nothing to worry about." while the competent members keep on keeping on.

Crazycryodude
Aug 15, 2015

Lets get our X tons of Duranium back!

....Is that still a valid thing to jingoistically blow out of proportion?


Xarbala posted:

Tudiya has got me chuckling irl right now, this is a big play and I'm glad that by tempering our ambitions we got Tudiya relaxed enough to throw us a bone with the local politics angle.

It really is one hell of a diplomatic maneuver, I wonder if he's been planning it for a while.

the_steve
Nov 9, 2005

We're always hiring!

Crazycryodude posted:

It really is one hell of a diplomatic maneuver, I wonder if he's been planning it for a while.

I dunno. I think our "discovering new secret smithing techniques" probably helped spur the idea.
Or maybe promoted it from a Plan C to Plan A

Olothreutes
Mar 31, 2007

Tudiya did seem to lead with "are you going to rapidly improve your smithing" before the segue into "mentor the grandson of possibly your greatest detractor in our city."

TK-42-1
Oct 30, 2013

looks like we have a bad transmitter



It’s a great power move. I wondered about the skin tone angle of it before he said it explicitly. Like “I wonder how black Asa’s grandkids are” and honestly, for that matter, I wonder if it was wise to send one of two huge black guys in Ur across the world to bring back a bunch of loot....

Olothreutes
Mar 31, 2007

TK-42-1 posted:

It’s a great power move. I wondered about the skin tone angle of it before he said it explicitly. Like “I wonder how black Asa’s grandkids are” and honestly, for that matter, I wonder if it was wise to send one of two huge black guys in Ur across the world to bring back a bunch of loot....

That was mentioned during the decision, it was sort of a wash between Asahel's weird skin tone but silver tongue and the more Urian friendly looking but less smooth Ithma iirc.

Crazycryodude
Aug 15, 2015

Lets get our X tons of Duranium back!

....Is that still a valid thing to jingoistically blow out of proportion?


Asahel's got a bunch of big beefy white dudes with him too, just in case.

TK-42-1
Oct 30, 2013

looks like we have a bad transmitter



God drat that trip was long irl. I really need to do a reread and stop just thinking about it.

the_steve
Nov 9, 2005

We're always hiring!

TK-42-1 posted:

God drat that trip was long irl. I really need to do a reread and stop just thinking about it.

For real. I know there's stuff we did that I've forgotten about or barely remember. Like talking to the Bull statue, I keep forgetting that was a thing until someone mentions it.

Cat Wings
Oct 12, 2012

B, that's just doing our job as magistrate letting him know the concerns of our city.

Albino Squirrel
Apr 25, 2003

Miosis more like meiosis
Wait, why do we keep calling Nusku a cokehead again?

Also, B. At least to plant the seed, we don't need to push this much.

Albino Squirrel fucked around with this message at 00:41 on May 28, 2020

Crazycryodude
Aug 15, 2015

Lets get our X tons of Duranium back!

....Is that still a valid thing to jingoistically blow out of proportion?


Zodiac5000 posted:

I don't, because it doesn't matter if the trio can or can't intervene for my statement to work. If they can't intervene then they should be more open regarding sorcerers and their treatment before we leave and if they won't intervene then they're just as complicit as Enkidel is. Enkidel is the one on the ground and he's had enough experiences in his life that openly claiming to be a demon priest inside the geographic region of Ur is going to trigger some fairly swift retaliation from him.

Unrelated: This interaction is not dispelling my theory that there was an empire generator point in the creation of this world and The Orm and El just made some loving *weird* choices regarding point allocation. (completely arbitrary point values incoming)

Empires have 25 base points to spend on special advantages and disadvantages.

Kadmonim :frogc00l:
Polythiestic Steppe Khanate (gently caress I don't know, I'll edit when we get the grasslands and find out)
4 Points: Grasslands starting territory - medium food moderate resources
2 Points: Horses. (other players begin eyeing stealing Kadmonim horses)
7 Points: Sorcery.
3 Points: Only you get the horses. (Kadmonim player spite-blocks everyone else)
7 Points: Choose one adjacent Allied Civilization at the start of the game. Your empires can never be worse than cordial relations if you are adjacent to at least two other enemy empires.
2 Points: Bronze age smithing
25 Points

Fare :black101:
Monothiestic Bloodpocalypse (Dictatorship - absolute control over all non-slave citizens at all times. Non-slaves do not suffer morale penalties when priests are present. You cannot accumulate decadence.)
+5 Points: Must constantly sacrifice slaves, suffer massive social order penalties when low on slaves.
+4 Points: You can never ally with another empire.
1 Point: Mountain starting territory - What the gently caress are you going to eat hahaha sure fine you have lots of metal
10 Points: Advances weapon and siege tactics.
12 Points: Cool Monsters.
4 Points: Blood sorcery only. (hope you have more slaves)
7 Points: Ironworking.
34 points

Ur :jewish:
Monothiestic bronze age grouping of city states (No central government - You can not directly interact with your cities or citizens. You are allowed cooldown limited intermediaries and must first run it through six rounds of google translate so those dumbass melachim can get close to understanding you. This will not be frustrating for you at all. Decadence lowers magical potency over time.)
+2 Points: Your empire is ignorant as hell and likes it that way thank you. (this will cause diplomacy issues)
+4 Points: Your cities will not immediately aid their neighbors if attacked by demons.
+4 Points: Each technology will increase unrest among the elites for a long time.
+5 Points: Building cities too close together will increase decadence based on city size and proximity.
+7 Points: Cities with high decadence are much more susceptible to enemy empire infiltration.
+10 Points: You cannot prevent new cities from being built. (because taking a boatload of synergizing disadvantages is.... a choice?)
6 Points: Several large starting zones with varied biomes. Empire will be larger than most.
20 Points: Magical potency proportionally improves citizenry and city stability. This effect is determined at unit spawn and scales with no upper limit. Oh, Uh... This only affects men because :biotruths: .
15 Points: You can not passively research technologies. Magical potency improves basic equipment proportionally.
6 Points: You mayselect 9 cities as immune to decadence, 6 cities as highly resistant to decadence, and 3 cities as moderately resistant to decadence.
6 Points: You may place two city states adjacent to your empire. These city states have your government type, very high magical potency and high decadence resistance. These states must remain allied with you but you may not intervene in their governing affairs unless invited. (They do not have to like you - shout outs to Seir!)
2 points: Priest-only spellcasters, spells cast by your priests drain your HP.
2 points: Bronze age smithing.
55 Points

Asherah :frogsiren:
Aquatic Godzillacracy (You are a giant loving monster. People can pray to you or be eaten. Decadence is meaningless before your massive claws.)
+60 Points: You are imprisoned but will break free in the endgame. You may not influence other empires with diplomacy or espionage. You cannot assist your troops with divine intervention until freed.
10 Points: Your starting location is literally all non-inland water sources, and all ocean beaches.
45 Points: You are Godzilla except you never save humanity from Mothra. You eat Mothra then humanity.
15 Points: You can not build troops. You have a larger and more powerful summonable monster catalog.
1 Point: You... have subsistence villages, I guess?
8 Points: Blood and Water Magic mastery.
6 Points: All mages are priests, and gain the immortal keyword.
85 points

NUSKU! :kingsley:
Hypercapitalistic Pyrophiliacs (This makes you in charge by default, being made of fire and all. Decadence gets... weird for you.)
+6 Points: You naturally generate higher decadence than usual.
+3 Points Somehow, you will never, ever, ever put your best foot forwards. You are the king of worst first impressions.
+1 Points: Your citizens are really, really obvious.
2 Points: Desert starting zone - poo poo food, poo poo water, poo poo shelter. (Why did you pick this again? Fare just forgot to pick a starting zone)
5 Points: Desert survival (Oh. Ok. Should have guessed this.)
15 Points: Your empire is immune to negative effects of decadence. (in the mechanics sense, not in the "They will try to gently caress fire" sense.)
5 Points: Fire magic mastery.
5 Points: You paid points to become immune to the negative effects of sticking your dick in fire. (Ok man, what would your internet history look like?)
3 Points: Now you're paying points to just have a bunch of cocaine all the time. (Go home Todd. I'll... figure out how to make this work.)
35 points

The Orm :allbuttons:
Snekocracy (You have no subjects. You're a snake. You also are immune to decadence.)
+8 Points: You are crazy bipolar. (But only when you're separate from HER. Which won't happen for more than a few days, so you'll be fine!)
+2 Points: You do not spread your ownership to adjacent provinces. Your home province cannot be taken while you are alive. (Not a big deal, SHE can still spread ownership!)
+5 points: You cannot leave your home province unless you are given permission. (Shouldn't be a problem! You have HER!)
+10 points: Asherah spotted you some points because of a trap card you don't get to learn about until later. I'm sure it's not a problem though, you're fine.
30 points: Your starting province is... jesus, thirty points. What the gently caress do you even want? an entire plane of existence? Like, a civilization of flying castles? .... A Hole?! What the gently caress? Do you have any idea how big that hole would have to... gently caress it, I'm tired of this. Fine. You get your hole.
20 points: You're a huge drat snake. (You're worse than Todd. How am I supposed to work with this?! You're a loving snake in a single giant hole. At least the other guys took it kind of seriously.)
50 points

And then Diog made an interesting story from all this.

Zodiac5000
Jun 19, 2006

Protects the Pack!

Doctor Rope
The Illuminated one was, in fact, immune to the negative effects of sticking his dick in fire. Nailed it.

By El, I need to finish working on the empires of the Amalakite giants and Old Amalek, including Mosquito Mountain and the civ expansions, Nephilim (for Ur and Asherah), and the Kadmonim individual deity encyclopedia.

Vagabong
Mar 2, 2019
B

seems like a good time to pad my rightvoting record

Albino Squirrel
Apr 25, 2003

Miosis more like meiosis

Zodiac5000 posted:

The Illuminated one was, in fact, immune to the negative effects of sticking his dick in fire. Nailed it.

By El, I need to finish working on the empires of the Amalakite giants and Old Amalek, including Mosquito Mountain and the civ expansions, Nephilim (for Ur and Asherah), and the Kadmonim individual deity encyclopedia.
If this was a Civ game, it's appropriate they just released Apocalypse Mode.

Goatse James Bond
Mar 28, 2010

If you see me posting please remind me that I have Charlie Work in the reports forum to do instead

the_steve posted:

Tudiya has a huge eugenics corkboard in his private study with all of the "optimal" ships and the Inheritance Buffs he's hoping to pass down.

just like Snarls

Bob Tuskins
Jul 27, 2007

I couldn't imagine life without the beautiful sight of the green horde
I would like to ask Tudiya about the differences in greater demons recognized by Karnak. Just kinda curious if he is familiar with them.

Also

We should ask Tudiya if it is okay to discuss Badad with Zeb

Mr. Nemo
Feb 4, 2016

I wish I had a sister like my big strong Daddy :(
When's the last time Tudiya got one of his many wives pregnant?

CloFan
Nov 6, 2004

B


super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

B

Ask Tudiya about the blood tree and what he thinks should be done about it in light of Zepa's declaration that no fruit-bearing tree should be destroyed.

TheCog
Jul 30, 2012

I AM ZEPA AND I CLAIM THESE LANDS BY RIGHT OF CONQUEST

super sweet best pal posted:

B

Ask Tudiya about the blood tree and what he thinks should be done about it in light of Zepa's declaration that no fruit-bearing tree should be destroyed.
do not do this

Bob Tuskins
Jul 27, 2007

I couldn't imagine life without the beautiful sight of the green horde

TheCog posted:

do not do this

definitely do not do this

FoxTerrier
Feb 15, 2012

Perfectly logical poster who uses the tools available to him to come to solid conclusions

Time to play catch up on 179 posts with FoxTerrier!

(The loser is everyone who reads)

Crazycryodude posted:

Fox God makes more and more sense every day

I agree. :agesilaus:

Also—no poo poo Tudiya is concerned and suspicious. We told him we had a weird pull, and then told him we met a weird civ. He's probably concerned the weird civ were demons planting the urge to travel in our head. Which isn't irrational given the world we inhabit.


Perfection


Heresy

---

OMGGGG when I saw 179 new posts I was sure there was a new update and yet it's just you mooks continuing to sew your hair shirts and sackcloth and pour ashes atop your head.

---

Zodiac5000 posted:

Tudiya and El are not the same and codes of conduct for them may differ. El approving of something does not mean tudiya will and vice versa. I don't understand the fixation folks have with saying "but El approved" like it's relevant or meaningful to whether Tudiya will.

At some point folks need to stop projecting and read the actual words on the page that characters have said instead of going "they'll understand, it got results!"

Yes. This.

Victis posted:


While the fertility cult of Nikall would make for hilarious allies and I'm all about it, not sure what they actually bring besides slightly patronizing guidance


Horse shaped cakes. Isn't that enough?

--

Oh thank god, the update.


1. B.
I'm not really in favor of attacking, but it seems worth discussing since it's such a hot topic.

2. Have there been any particularly promising manhood trails amongst our family while I was away?

Any significant news from neighboring cities? Are all at peace?

How have the harvests been in Zepath? Any decline?


All jokes aside, the marriage is an excellent idea and we should set Naomi and Asahel on the task of selecting just the right bride. A happy, successful marriage bodes well for peace between factions. One where the bride and groom hate each others guts? Not so much.

Fortunately being first wife to a young, heavily blooded man is probably tempting enough Naomi and Asahel should theoretically be able to find someone happy about the idea and well suited easily enough.

Mr. Nemo posted:

When's the last time Tudiya got one of his many wives pregnant?

NOOOOOPE

Cornuto
Jun 26, 2012

For the pack!

Victis posted:

While the fertility cult of Nikall would make for hilarious allies and I'm all about it, not sure what they actually bring besides slightly patronizing guidance (which we have enough of). Maybe if we give the Orbs back they will hand out more prophecies that we can't tell anyone about. vvvv

Looking back however long ago it was in the thread where Tudiya ushered us into a dark room and whispered to us the big kings only level secret that demons were at war with Ur, and Enkidel was like "no poo poo, hoss." I think its pretty funny that Nikall just told us the same thing 200 years later but now its upgraded to a gods only level secret.

Cornuto fucked around with this message at 03:41 on May 28, 2020

Patrick Spens
Jul 21, 2006

"Every quarterback says they've got guts, But how many have actually seen 'em?"
Pillbug

super sweet best pal posted:

Ask Tudiya about the blood tree and what he thinks should be done about it in light of Zepa's declaration that no fruit-bearing tree should be destroyed.

Nein

Zodiac5000
Jun 19, 2006

Protects the Pack!

Doctor Rope
That just gets us in trouble and the tree destroyed, right? That's what telling Tudiya does? The bit about fruit-bearing is just fluff?

SniperWoreConverse
Mar 20, 2010



Gun Saliva
we've hashed thru the tree over and over again

we know that if we believe it's truly a demon tree of evil we must destroy it. The fruit tree thing is not any kind of loophole. Bringing it up in the form of that question is going to make us look like an incompetent moron and get the tree burned

Patrick Spens
Jul 21, 2006

"Every quarterback says they've got guts, But how many have actually seen 'em?"
Pillbug

Zodiac5000 posted:

That just gets us in trouble and the tree destroyed, right? That's what telling Tudiya does? The bit about fruit-bearing is just fluff?

Folks keep trying to use the fruit-bearing thing as a gotcha w.r.t. the demon tree, but they're ignoring A) the purpose of the rule about fruit bearing trees and B) We burned an entire grove of fruit trees with Aaron when we were younger, and Tudiya absolutely thought that was the right thing to do.

Olothreutes
Mar 31, 2007

Cornuto posted:

Looking back however long ago it was in the thread where Tudiya ushered us into a dark room and whispered to us the big kings only level secret that demons were at war with Ur, and Enkidel was like "no poo poo, hoss." I think its pretty funny that Nikall just told us the same thing 200 years later but now its upgraded to a gods only level secret.

The secret wasn't that we are at war. That's just normal info. The secret was that there is a literal legion of melachim in Zepath to watch the sea, since the chains began to weaken.

E:

Diogines posted:

Tudiya looks to Ishamal who says "If you are certain."

Tudiya says "Our line has the favor of El. No mere boast, but, in truth. Melachim guard Zepath, to watch the sea. In the literal sense. They walk among us unseen. Yet it is not fitting for mortal men such as we to see the face of the divine. Our lives would cease to be as they are, we, would cease to be as we are and worse, would raise altars to honor them and make them our news gods. We are not as men were in ancient days, our ears too impure to hear their speech. Ishamal in his ancient years and wisdom is beyond this temptation. When word must come from them, he delivers it. Since the days of my great grandfather. Asherah, dead but not defeated. Since the time when the chains began to weaken."

Zepath has literal guardian angels melachim? And Ishamal is their voice? And Asherah, dead... but not defeated?

Olothreutes fucked around with this message at 04:48 on May 28, 2020

Crazycryodude
Aug 15, 2015

Lets get our X tons of Duranium back!

....Is that still a valid thing to jingoistically blow out of proportion?


FoxTerrier posted:

All jokes aside, the marriage is an excellent idea and we should set Naomi and Asahel on the task of selecting just the right bride. A happy, successful marriage bodes well for peace between factions. One where the bride and groom hate each others guts? Not so much.

Fortunately being first wife to a young, heavily blooded man is probably tempting enough Naomi and Asahel should theoretically be able to find someone happy about the idea and well suited easily enough.

You know what we should do? Find a bride who wants to learn how to smith too, surely among Asahel's family there's one heretical enough for that. And then Maadai's bride visits the forge so often because, uh.... she just loves her husband so much and they can't bear to be separated, yeah. And if she insists on being around (listening in on all the lectures) anyways, well, what's the harm in letting her pitch in here and there? Many hands make light work, surely even a woman can handle some forge tasks, even if it's just carting fuel and pumping bellows.

super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

Patrick Spens posted:

Folks keep trying to use the fruit-bearing thing as a gotcha w.r.t. the demon tree, but they're ignoring A) the purpose of the rule about fruit bearing trees and B) We burned an entire grove of fruit trees with Aaron when we were younger, and Tudiya absolutely thought that was the right thing to do.

All I'm saying is that because of that law, we should not destroy it without Tudiya's permission.

Patrick Spens
Jul 21, 2006

"Every quarterback says they've got guts, But how many have actually seen 'em?"
Pillbug
But checking with Tudiya requires telling him that we have a demon tree and haven't killed it yet. Which will piss him off. Like the fact that it grows fruit will not be relevant to him here.

Olothreutes
Mar 31, 2007

We should keep the tree because it hasn't harmed a single person and it's the only one that isn't buried in a tomb a thousand miles beyond the edge of any maps. Our commitment to biodiversity must be upheld.

Also I want to graft things to it. Imagine if it could create the best oranges in addition to pomegranates. We should also graft a branch from that tree to a regular tree. Maybe we can grow delicious pomegranates without killing a bull.

Mr. Prokosch
Feb 14, 2012

Behold My Magnificence!
I am pro demon tree but I respect voters that aren't.

Polgas
Sep 2, 2018


With one hand he saves gebs. With the other he commits goblin genocide. A true neutral.

If we do succeed in corrupting Maadai and he and his eventual bride return to Zepath would they be too high profile to be assassinated by whoever burned those farmers?

Did anything funky happen at home when Enkidel spent loads of ??? and made Avery?

Polgas fucked around with this message at 06:03 on May 28, 2020

By popular demand
Jul 17, 2007

IT *BZZT* WASP ME--
IT WASP ME ALL *BZZT* ALONG!


super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

Mr. Prokosch posted:

I am pro demon tree but I respect voters that aren't.

I'm pro-tree but I want our rear end covered if anti-tree wins the vote.

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Zodiac5000
Jun 19, 2006

Protects the Pack!

Doctor Rope
Why would telling tudiya somehow cover us? it would do the opposite, it exposes us to a ton of liability. You are voting for something that would destroy the tree, how are you pro tree?

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