(Thread IKs:
Josherino)
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Zoom is almost as good as in-person
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May 31, 2020 14:47
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Trixie Hardcore posted:Also wtf is up with your therapist telling you his opinion on your friend? Hes not her therapist he has no basis for determining if she has issues. I read him our text messages verbatim and his response was literally "quite frankly, if she's not seeing a therapist, she should be."
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May 31, 2020 15:10
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err posted:How are you all meeting with your therapists/psychiatrists now that covid is still around? Is it through telephone? I have Kaiser if anyone knows. SpiderHyphenMan posted:I read him our text messages verbatim and his response was literally "quite frankly, if she's not seeing a therapist, she should be."
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May 31, 2020 19:13
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err posted:How are you all meeting with your therapists/psychiatrists now that covid is still around? Is it through telephone? I have Kaiser if anyone knows. Mines been doing phone calls, yes
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Jun 1, 2020 04:04
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I just wanna say I'm pretty sick of my problems and I'd like it if my brain could process anxiety more appropriately
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Jun 1, 2020 05:26
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Trixie Hardcore posted:Using Zoom for Healthcare video chat. My therapist also offers Verizon Telehealth video chat which I havent used but seems pretty similar to Zoom, both are HIPAA compliant. Kaiser is doing video chat therapy too but Im not sure what service. If you dont have a therapist to call for more info contact Kaiser https://healthy.kaiserpermanente.org/health-wellness/mental-health/how-to-get-care Zoom isn't actually HIPAA compliant but they waived confidentiality regulations for telehealth during the pandemic  . There is a HIPAA compliant healthcare version but that's not what 99% of therapists are using at the moment.I'm doing phone sessions with patients, though that's only because I prefer it to video for a bunch of subjective reasons, nothing to do with confidentiality. Mechafunkzilla has issued a correction as of 05:41 on Jun 1, 2020 |
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Jun 1, 2020 05:36
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Mechafunkzilla posted:Zoom isn't actually HIPAA compliant but they waived confidentiality regulations for telehealth during the pandemic I thought Zoom for Healthcare was the HIPAA compliant version of Zoom? The consent form said it was a HIPAA compliant and thats what all my doctors & therapist claim to be using. What is the HIPAA compliant version called and why are 99% of therapists using the wrong one?
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Jun 1, 2020 06:06
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Trixie Hardcore posted:I thought Zoom for Healthcare was the HIPAA compliant version of Zoom? The consent form said it was a HIPAA compliant and that’s what all my doctors & therapist claim to be using. What is the HIPAA compliant version called and why are 99% of therapists using the wrong one? Yeah, that's the one. It justs costs more and most therapists who are in private practice and not tech savvy aren't gonna bother as long as long as the regulations are waived, or they're using cheaper encrypted platforms like doxy. Anyone who was doing teleheath stuff before the pandemic will be better set up, naturally. Mechafunkzilla has issued a correction as of 07:01 on Jun 1, 2020 |
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Jun 1, 2020 06:53
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I've been dealing with a lot of anxiety in the past month over the future and it's really starting to wear on me. Obvo the future doesn't look all that great but it still shouldn't be crippling like this because I have good things in my life to look forward to. I need some amount of relief/release to avoid ending up in a very bad place, and sorting out my daily schedule is helping, but that's only going to get me so far. I'm not really looking for answers per se since I don't think there are anything except meditate on the uncertainty of the future, but I'm open to suggestions. On that note: one of things I'm dreading about the future is the election. To be blunt, I see no way that Biden wins. (I mean, I'm wrong about pretty much every political event ever, so maybe this is a good thing) Setting aside the fact that Biden is probably prolonging the inevitable at best, another four years of Trump and I'm not sure what anything looks like. That's my biggest worry: I have no idea what kind of lunacy we're going to end up in. I did everything I could for Bernie, so I've more or less come to terms with four more years of Trump or am trying to. I can't plan poo poo in that case. I'm trying to make post election plans, and I don't have anything at all. It's just a blank wall. I usually at least have some sort of contingency plan visualized so that has me shook. On a further note, I'm worried about y'all. This thread's really going to be a raw emotional wound if things go south in November, and I'm not going to be a great place myself on top of that. I know I don't own the thread and I can't save anyone just point the way and all that, but is there anything I can do to provide any tiny amount of comfort? Resources? Anything? I'm preparing for the worst here, and one of the things I'm scared about in the future is what us mentally ill folk are going to do if Trump's reelected. Stealth edit: Please refrain from posting poo poo like "lol we all die that's what" because it falls under the anti-nothing-mattering clause in the OP. It's ok to express anguish but don't make definitive discouraging statements. I hope I don't have to explain why but I will if necessary.
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Jun 1, 2020 17:28
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Chokes McGee posted:I've been dealing with a lot of anxiety in the past month over the future and it's really starting to wear on me. Obvo the future doesn't look all that great but it still shouldn't be crippling like this because I have good things in my life to look forward to. I need some amount of relief/release to avoid ending up in a very bad place, and sorting out my daily schedule is helping, but that's only going to get me so far. I'm not really looking for answers per se since I don't think there are anything except meditate on the uncertainty of the future, but I'm open to suggestions. ya I feel you. poo poo's hosed. I was thinking of doing a group meditation on discord one night or something if ppl were interested
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Jun 1, 2020 17:37
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thehandtruck posted:ya I feel you. poo poo's hosed. I was thinking of doing a group meditation on discord one night or something if ppl were interested Definitely interested, so you have at least one. I feel you too. I just filed divorce papers this morning, and I moved onto a cute little place of my own on Memorial Day. This means that the toxic marriage phase of my life is finally over. It also means I no longer have the immigration option of an well-to-do EU spouse, so I'm just a barely-making-it-by poor who can't leave his beloved swamp no matter what horror Trump brings upon us. And he will, because you're right, there's no way Biden wins. We'll be lucky if it's just 4 more years, and McConnell doesn't try to railroad through an amendment to remove the term limit. Trump openly wants to be a dictator for life, and they've given him everything he wants so far. The democratic leadership has hosed us all, themselves included, because they couldn't bear the thought of Bernie taking some of their money. Even though they run the House and could probably have just stopped him that way, they had to torpedo the whole goddamn country just to be sure. They knew what they were doing. And I know you all know this, because for a lot of people, anxiety is just the lack of a functional normalcy bias. I probably shouldn't even post it, because I don't want to be a bummer and it might set some of you off. But I'd rather face it and say this: The world has literally survived worse and bounced back. Trump isn't Hitler, at least not yet, and there's a lot of hope that people at home or abroad will put a stop to it if he tries. The long arc of the universe still bends towards justice, even if that saying doesn't acknowledge that the individual points on the line still feel lovely as hell. There's even hope that these riots could engender real and revolutionary change. We can't predict the future, but we can focus on now and remember that we've got each other, our therapists, and our real-world friends and family. In my experience there are always options that a broke brain can't see, and all it sometimes takes is a little nudge in the right direction from someone else. I hope this doesn't sound patronizing, because I really believe it. Keep your hopes up, your eyes open, and keep putting one foot stubbornly in front of the other. You're all worthy of love and laughter and some good goddamn luck once in a while. 
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Jun 1, 2020 19:07
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Even if things get worse we will eventually come out the other side, and I hope to still be here when that happens. It is terrible that the powerful people are so eager for blood and destruction, and that ordinary people will pay for it with their lives, but that's where we are, and we have to fight our way through it.
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Jun 1, 2020 19:49
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xcheopis posted:It's far more than that. It's being expected to remember birthdays and appointments and buying all the presents because the stupid fucker claims not to know what his mother likes and if a present isn't brought than you, the person he's been dating for a few months, will be poo poo-talked by his family and friends. It's being the sole parent who cares enough about the child/ren you have to arrange their medical visits and play dates and checking their homework. It's many, many things that women are "required" to do, all the time, along with trying to live their own lives. Yes, sorry, I didn't mean to diminish the labour done on top of being a "free" therapist, I was just giving an example. This is a good post, and I'm sorry you've had to deal with this.
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Jun 1, 2020 20:13
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Unsinkabear posted:Definitely interested, so you have at least one. This was really helpful. Thank you.
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Jun 1, 2020 20:46
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I feel bad for Americans. My dad renounced his US citizenship because America was too hosed up in the 60s, and I left Canada in part because it goes where America goes. But most people don't have that option, especially those of us with mental illness. I don't have anything useful to say other than you have my solidarity.  And yeah, focus on your immediate friends and family. Life doesn't have to be about the bigger picture.
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Jun 2, 2020 03:13
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besides depression and the littany of things weird in my head, the sheer uncertainty of current events is freaking me out the riots are understandable and I like it when cop cars get stolen/burned, but wait there's an active global pandemic that we don't want a second wave of. also what if these protests do result in an overthrow or regime change? is it gonna be Good America after that, or is it gonna be some handmaid's tale theocracy or a military junta? Are we gonna get full karma when another country steps in to take advantage of our uprising like we did a bunch of other countries? our own mental health problems are being compounded by the very legitimate anxiety of living in Interesting Times and the two, admittedly polarized halves of my brain are locked in a battle of "hell yeah destroy the fourth reich" vs "go the gently caress home everyone? go back to quarantine? for now? please?"
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Jun 2, 2020 03:19
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I hosed off to spend a few days with some friends and in the daytime I'm properly happy and relaxed, and at night I see the inevitable apocalyptic poo poo that I'm shocked took this long to reach, and I hate myself that I haven't got the integrity to back up all my fake loving convictions in any kind of way. The difference between what is just and what won't get me killed is a canyon wide and I'm not a good person, I can't do anything that isn't just gratifying myself. When I spend the rest of my life in the constant anxiety of being on the fascists' chopping block for any or no reason, I will deserve every grey hair. May they pick me to make an example of first, because I'd consider that poo poo a mercy. (I'm not in any danger, nor am I a danger to others, I just feel right now like I've got cancer that can't kill me but can grow unfettered, and right now I'm more tumor than man with no sign of slowing down. I also just took my pills, so obviously I'm not totally despondent. If I stop, then I will be, so I'm going to spend a couple more days inside and being a useless liberal.) Alvarez IV has issued a correction as of 05:17 on Jun 2, 2020 |
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Jun 2, 2020 04:28
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Feranon posted:besides depression and the littany of things weird in my head, the sheer uncertainty of current events is freaking me out this might as well be my post. i feel you and i have no idea how to reconcile any of my thoughts lately.
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Jun 2, 2020 21:20
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You know what, I had this big essay typed out about how I've been self-medicating with weed, and while I was feeling sad for the madness that may coming, I realized something: there's a reason the phrase is "don't morn, organize." This poo poo is infuriating, it's not set in stone yet, and the fact that we as a people are going to allow *these* loving dumbasses be the ones who are going to kill us all should be incredibly insulting. Like seeing-red, fighting angry. So here's the thing: if I can't find the tiniest bit of hope in the coming days, then maybe I can at least focus on the anger I'm feeling *now.* I stay angry, then I'll be too busy to let myself feel bad. I can have my mental breakdown when it's peaceful again. (No, there are no illegal acts are being planned, I'm just feeling determination for once)
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Jun 3, 2020 05:21
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I'm once again pondering how all that I have is a job that pays decently yet I am not learning anything and am probably going to lose. I don't enjoy things anymore. Sometimes I will play a video game a bunch, then burn out and not want to play it again. Back in the before times, the few times I got matches in online dating, I just let conversations trail off. I don't even know what I would invite then to do. I don't want to travel anywhere, especially now. I don't want to fight for a cause because I'm afraid I'll get ostracized or beaten up. I feel like I am literally just sitting here waiting until I grow old and die. Like it takes an Herculean effort just to mimic something resembling a life. And I feel others can sense it and stay the gently caress away. I am a void. Help.
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Jun 3, 2020 10:22
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AceOfFlames posted:I'm once again pondering how all that I have is a job that pays decently yet I am not learning anything and am probably going to lose. Sounds like you're in an enormous amount of pain, I'm very sorry for that. Since you asked for help, what would that look like from posters in this thread?
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Jun 3, 2020 17:27
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May was so loving hard, yall. Panic symptoms finally seem under control and/or have subsided, still taking propanolol. Been super restless the past couple days but have been doing some guided meditations here and there, including last night, which really seemed to help. It's based on "Maitribodh Parivaar" which I've never heard of but a friend introduced me to it after reaching out about my panic symptoms. I guess it's benign, but as a skeptic it was a little goofy since you spend part of the session staring at this dude's face for like 10 minutes. Shrug, the meditation portion was pretty effective at least! Reticent about going on lamictal in ~two weeks and having to endure new side effects while still worrying about COVID. Just found out one of my coworkers tested positive for it today. We haven't had contact since March but that still spooked me pretty bad today. AceOfFlames posted:I'm once again pondering how all that I have is a job that pays decently yet I am not learning anything and am probably going to lose. I have nothing magical to offer but I know how you feel. Objectively speaking I'm doing "fine" but I haven't found joy in many things I used to enjoy (gaming, music, drawing, etc) and have let my few dating matches dry up after a couple rounds of texts. What I will say is that it's okay to have conversations trail off; sometimes there's no chemistry despite the mutual match. It happens a lot. It's a scary time to travel dude, I don't think anyone will blame you for not wanting to go anywhere. I've had a couple friends reach out and be like "you should use some PTO!" but I'm like "where do I go/what do I do with my time off?" they'll say "go to a cabin in the mountains!" or something and I'm just...not really about that right now. It's okay. You don't have to be on the frontlines of the protests, no matter what your peers or other SA posters may say. If you want to contribute somehow, you could donate to a bail fund. They're giving away gang tags for a donation in Games, IIRC. You could sit in the back and give water and masks to people. You don't have to beat yourself up or blame yourself if you don't want to get physically involved. I'm the same way. I wish I could do more but I just don't have the mental strength to right now, but I did donate to a local bail fund and am talking to friends about it. poo poo really sucks right now. I hope things get better for you, because I understand that void-like feeling. novaSphere has issued a correction as of 22:21 on Jun 3, 2020 |
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Jun 3, 2020 21:57
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tw: I use the word "suicide". (I AM NOT PLANNING ANYTHING, I AM NOT GOING TO HARM MYSELF OR OTHERS.) My relationship to medication has been a complicated one. Meds are not problem-solvers, but rather chemicals that do a particular thing to your brain. There are people who need to make the happy chemical in their brain to function, or to block the sad chemical, but a greater deal of depression is, I imagine, environmental. For me, 99% of current and 95% of lifetime depression has been environmental. There is probably a level of destruction of my brain that could make me technically unable to comprehend the concept of all this poo poo in the world, but a lobotomy is basically suicide and I can't/won't do that guiltlessly with family still alive. I have never responded well to therapy. I tried one therapist in 2016 who was a MAGA, and the rest are either liberals or similarly hopeless people to the left of the liberals who try telling me to meditate and other stuff that does nothing for me. Keeping your anxieties in objective perspective works when you're anxious that people in the grocery store are staring at you, not when you're correct. With this in mind, I never know how to talk to my doctor about adjusting my meds. New ones take too long to kick in, and the world still turns in the meantime, and I don't know what I should be looking for. I feel like integrity is a negative evolutionary trait but also one that you can't totally abandon if you've ever properly had it in the first place, and goddamn me for valuing integrity at all, if not having it (I have at least tried to have it). If happiness is a 10 (not out of 10, out of whatever) and I have a 1 and 2 is the best I can get, how much am I really helping myself if I know I can't break 2?
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Jun 4, 2020 00:13
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Alvarez IV posted:tw: I use the word "suicide". (I AM NOT PLANNING ANYTHING, I AM NOT GOING TO HARM MYSELF OR OTHERS.) That sounds really tough. You are coherent in describing how you feel. I hope you can find a way to discuss meds with your doctor.
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Jun 4, 2020 01:01
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I am diagnosed Bipolar type 1 and I have been quitting a years long weed habit the last few days and its hosed with my sleep and feelings all over the place. I luckily could take a day or two off work otherwise Id be really struggling and relapse. Hang in there everyone.
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Jun 4, 2020 01:02
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novaSphere posted:If you want to contribute somehow, you could donate to a bail fund. They're giving away gang tags for a donation in Games, IIRC.  Thank you for this suggestion. I've been feeling a lot of guilt for not participating in the protests, and the donations I have managed aren't as directly supportive of the cause as the bail fund will be. Feels good! Unsinkabear has issued a correction as of 02:59 on Jun 4, 2020 |
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Jun 4, 2020 02:54
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Being trans makes me worthless and lovely every day. I have a stupid disease that I can only cure by putting up the equivalent of a kick-me sign on my back, because my body is just utterly hosed by puberty and all the HRT and surgery in the world will just mitigate it. Leftists are loving worthless about helping me out with it, I've found; a lot of the advice I've been given is predicated on pretending the world is accepting when it is not, which doesn't exactly work the second you meet a right winger. This is only when people bother to give advice; a good portion of people here seem to have the "well if I let a worker say "tranny" in order to get him to read Marx, it's probably worth it" attitude that poisons people's loving minds. Liberals are only slightly better in the sense that they occasionally do some positive representation in TV shows in between finding the worst looking trans women they can find or casting cis men as trans women. I honestly don't know why I should ever bother being out, it'd just make me a joke at wherever I worked to my coworkers and any customers.
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Jun 4, 2020 04:45
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SandS I'm sorry. You aren't worthless. You have always had value and always will.
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Jun 4, 2020 05:04
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cis people give terrible comfort, its either empty positivity or empty consolation. I really appreciate the cis people in my life who listen to me bitch and then say yeah that sucks
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Jun 4, 2020 20:38
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- hi
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SandS you are absolutely not worthless, just by being out you are raising peoples awareness and getting them to rethink their assumptions about trans people and what it means to be a gendered human, you will encounter some bullshit but thats how change works, think of it as though youve been taking punches so people who come after you wont have to (and hopefully you will get to see that better world yourself soon too).
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Jun 5, 2020 20:07
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SunAndSpring posted:Being trans makes me worthless and lovely every day. I have a stupid disease that I can only cure by putting up the equivalent of a kick-me sign on my back, because my body is just utterly hosed by puberty and all the HRT and surgery in the world will just mitigate it. Leftists are loving worthless about helping me out with it, I've found; a lot of the advice I've been given is predicated on pretending the world is accepting when it is not, which doesn't exactly work the second you meet a right winger. This is only when people bother to give advice; a good portion of people here seem to have the "well if I let a worker say "tranny" in order to get him to read Marx, it's probably worth it" attitude that poisons people's loving minds. Liberals are only slightly better in the sense that they occasionally do some positive representation in TV shows in between finding the worst looking trans women they can find or casting cis men as trans women. I honestly don't know why I should ever bother being out, it'd just make me a joke at wherever I worked to my coworkers and any customers. Hi, trans who has been fighting a lot of these problems myself for the last 3-4 years or so. The hardest thing I have been dealing with is treating myself the same way I would treat other trans people. We have so much internalized transphobia that we end up brutally policing ourselves but we know how uncalled for and terrible it would be to tell another trans person. Treat others the way you want to be treated is true in the inverse, be as kind to yourself as you are to others. Also, if you seek your humanity from the approval of others you will never get to have it. Marsha Johnson fought and died for our right to be ourselves. We have to fight for the generations who will come after us. But most of all, be safe and do what feels right to you.
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Jun 6, 2020 00:15
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I will say that getting probed for two weeks for shitposting and then the whole uprising in that time as well really invigorated me with a new perspective on life and injected fresh optimism and raw ideology into my veins. I feel terrible for the bad faith posting and blatant trolling I've done in the past. Also I hope just seeing so many people come out to support the BLM movement has given you all at least some hope and alleviation from the constant cynicism and negativity that plagues the world today. Even if this specific moment slows down, it just means we have so much more support for the movement going forward. The Civil Rights Movement definitely had some years of difficulty in organizing. For example after the success of the Montgomery bus boycott in 1956, the movement slowed for the rest of the decade until the sit-ins in March 1960.
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Jun 6, 2020 23:14
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It blows my mind how lovely people can be to call center employees. Im laying here grinding my teeth unable to stop thinking about the abuse I endured from rear end in a top hat customers. Because of a thunderstorm with 70 mph winds knocking out half a million peoples power, in a pandemic, while the city is in The Cool Zone. my company had me work forced overtime Wednesday thru today for a total of 67 hours this week. I keep trying to think of the nice overtime check Ill be getting but it feels kind of like being paid to be beat up or something. I dont know why people think calling in and screaming and verbally abusing a hapless call center employee will somehow make field workers work to get their lights on faster. I even had one guy in one of the wealthiest loving towns in the country compare himself to George Floyd and that I was the knee on his neck. Just call after call.What the gently caress is wrong with people. American culture is a loving toxic shitshow in so many ways. And the support from the company is a joke. company wide emails saying how proud the CEO is of us for stepping up and getting peoples lights back on and taking their calls. Last night I was even having nightmares about work. Work actually hasnt been that bad though until this week since Im working from home. Im just worried there will be more weeks like this one though because of climate change. And now theres mass unemployment so Im fortunate to even have a job. Ive been trying to learn some python through DataCamp so I can get a different position as a computer toucher but I just cant focus on it. Im really bad at holding myself accountable for keeping up with tasks that arent strictly necessary or urgent thanks to my ADHD. Im planning on going out and protesting tomorrow on my day off, hopefully I can at least be a part of unfucking this cursed country.
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Jun 7, 2020 05:34
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Made the mistake of watching one of the vids of cops murdering a human and then laughing about it. Trust me, no matter how angry you are at yourself or at them, do not watch the videos. edit: the cops laughing, not me obviously thehandtruck has issued a correction as of 06:50 on Jun 7, 2020 |
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Jun 7, 2020 06:46
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Yeah saw the vid of them pushing that old guy over, and basically steamed for the remainder of the day. Every single officer present at the time should be fired. You don't leave a person bleeding on the ground, barring actual literal life threatening personal danger, which was not even close to present there. Probably good to avoid watching the base callousness of humanity made manifest if that sort of thing gets to you, or if you don't have a good outlet for the emotions it draws up.
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Jun 7, 2020 22:21
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So I'm starting a new job as an HVAC installer this week. The pay will be less than 1/5th of what I make in my current seafaring job as a third mate, but at least I'll be able to spend more than 1-3 months at home in a given year. I wanted to be closer to home to spend more time with my wife, and I suppose I did get my wish. But it turns out that being home for all of 1 month in 2019 and then going straight to 6 months of sick & unpaid leave/COVID quarantine being in each other's space 24/7 wasn't healthy for our relationship. We've been under a lot of stress with my job, two recent deaths in my family & my mother's now unchecked gambling addiction that's threatening her possibility of retirement. I've also suspected for a while that I might have undiagnosed ADHD which I think has been a big source of frustration for both of us, and I'm finally trying to make an appointment with a therapist this week, but I fear it's too late to save my marriage. She says she still loves me but we're at the point where she feels like she can't talk to me and we should probably live apart. I don't know if there's any coming back from that. I just don't know what to do anymore. I've never been to therapy before and I guess I'm just hoping that it plus the stability of a new job will help me sort things out. But I'm a loving idiot, so who knows?
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Jun 7, 2020 22:52
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fibblins posted:So I'm starting a new job as an HVAC installer this week. The pay will be less than 1/5th of what I make in my current seafaring job as a third mate, but at least I'll be able to spend more than 1-3 months at home in a given year. I wanted to be closer to home to spend more time with my wife, and I suppose I did get my wish. But it turns out that being home for all of 1 month in 2019 and then going straight to 6 months of sick & unpaid leave/COVID quarantine being in each other's space 24/7 wasn't healthy for our relationship. This isn't my place or probably the right place at all, but just because it seems like such a large potentially life-affecting factor I'm going to say it: if your wife was the primary reason for changing jobs, and things with your wife seem unlikely to work out either way, I would do everything I could to at least keep the option open on the job that pays five times as much  That said, you are not an idiot. That does loving suck and I'm so sorry you're dealing with all of that. But none of it is your fault. It all sounds like fairly normal human struggles. The kind of poo poo that happens to us all. Hell, it's happening to me right now, I just got my date for divorce court. I'll get through it, and so will you. It's also possible that your marriage is more salvageable than your brain is telling you. We've got your back until you figure it out.
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Jun 8, 2020 04:32
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His work schedule is insane by industry standards in the US, sailing as an officer for more than 8 months a year absolute max and almost always 5-6 is going to be soul destroying if you're over 25.
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Jun 8, 2020 05:02
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I'm sad, and I don't know when i will be happy again, and I want to write my stories but its too hard right now.
Boba Pearl has issued a correction as of 21:21 on Jun 8, 2020 |
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Jun 8, 2020 06:56
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E: by request.
Chokes McGee has issued a correction as of 23:40 on Jun 8, 2020 |
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Jun 8, 2020 17:49
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