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zimbomonkey
Jul 15, 2008

Tattoos? On MY black quarterback?
It should definitely go to a team who has no Super Bowl wins so far in their history. And it should also definitely be in the conference that lost the most recent Super Bowl. Also, probably a team with a new head coach?

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fartknocker
Oct 28, 2012


Damn it, this always happens. I think I'm gonna score, and then I never score. It's not fair.



Wedge Regret

Silly Burrito posted:

That Rams NFCCG loss should give us at least 10 more ping pong balls. :colbert:

Drew Brees‘ views and helping with church sex abuse stuff is worth taking away 8 or 9 of them. :colbert:

Spoeank posted:

I think that in the event of a canceled season, the #1 overall pick should go to the runner up of the most recent Super Bowl, whoever that might be

Jimmy vs Trevor: Hair Wars.

That, it recreating that picture of Alex Smith and Kap in the locker room staring at each other awkwardly.

Either way, the Giants having the hypothetical best odds (lol) would be wonderful to see what Gettleman would do with it.

Metapod
Mar 18, 2012
Top ten player Derrick Henry

kiimo
Jul 24, 2003

Why are people talking about Antonio Brown like he isn't currently suspended and doesn't he currently have ongoing legal issues relating to his sexual assault claims?

Phobeste
Apr 9, 2006

never, like, count out Touchdown Tom, man
Because he's good at football, OP. Hope this helps you.

kiimo
Jul 24, 2003

I hear Josh Gordon is clean and in the best shape of his life

sharknado slashfic
Jun 24, 2011


https://twitter.com/toddkarpovich/status/1288512484199018496

Antonio Brown, the type of guy you need in your locker room.

Ehud
Sep 19, 2003

football.


Great! I’m glad his hip bone is connected to his leg bone.

D-LINK
Oct 1, 2007

I was talking to peachy Peach about kissy Kiss. He bought me a soda.

sharknado slashfic posted:

https://twitter.com/toddkarpovich/status/1288512484199018496

Antonio Brown, the type of guy you need in your locker room.

weebay.gif

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!

Ehud posted:

Great! I’m glad his hip bone is connected to his leg bone.

Can you lose a leg to the covid? Cause that guy would find a way.

FizFashizzle
Mar 30, 2005







Man Lamar has a ton of bad opinions.

Shinjobi
Jul 10, 2008


Gravy Boat 2k
It's cool that Lamar Jackson is dumb as poo poo.


Or not. I can't remember which.

Ehud
Sep 19, 2003

football.

Jiminy Christmas! Shoes! posted:

Can you lose a leg to the covid? Cause that guy would find a way.

Tua is gonna be just fine. I am praying for his health.

FizFashizzle
Mar 30, 2005







Jiminy Christmas! Shoes! posted:

Can you lose a leg to the covid? Cause that guy would find a way.

https://twitter.com/CNN/status/1252200887453392896?s=20

kiimo
Jul 24, 2003

Shinjobi posted:

It's cool that Lamar Jackson is dumb as poo poo.


Or not. I can't remember which.

I remember the beach football and diving over the wave runner and the idea that he was going to have a covid party but what other dumb poo poo has he done

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!

Ehud posted:

Tua is gonna be just fine. I am praying for his health.

He's going to die OP

wandler20
Nov 13, 2002

How many Championships?

Metapod posted:

Top ten player Derrick Henry

I'd like to issue an apology for my Derrick Henry slander earlier in this thread.

Mystic Stylez
Dec 19, 2009

lmao at that quote

gently caress Calais Campbell the guy we need in our locker room is Antonio Brown

Hamhandler
Aug 9, 2008

[I want to] shit in your fucking mouth. [I'm going to] slap your fucking mouth. [I'm going to] slap your real mother across the face [laughter]. Fuck you, you're still a rookie. I'll kill you.

Kalli posted:

Idea: Every team gets 1 ping pong ball for each loss they've had over the past 3 seasons.

So that gives:

36 - Giants 4.71% odds of #1 pick
34 - Browns 4.44%
33 - Bengals 4.31%
32 - Jets 4.18%
31 - Cardinals, Washington, Buccaneers, Raiders 4.05%
30 - Dolphins, Broncos 3.92%
29 - Lions 3.79%
27 - Jaguars, Colts 3.53%
25 - 49ers, Panthers 3.27%
24 - Falcons 3.14%
23 - Texans, Bears, Bills 3.01%
22 - Chargers 2.88%
21 - Packers, Titans, Cowboys 2.75%
18 - Seahakws 2.35%
17 - Steelers, Eagles 2.22%
16 - Vikings 2.09%
15 - Ravens, Rams 1.96%
14 - Chiefs 1.83%
12 - Patriots 1.57%
11 - Saints 1.44%

Then draw a draft order from that pool.

I think that's got way too high of generating a draft order that's doesn't do a whole hell of a lot for parity. You've got what, a 25-30% chance for a playoff team to get the #1 overall, and then probably a 5-10% chance of a team that both made the playoffs and probably would not draft Trevor Lawrence at #1.

IMO if they play games but don't think what occurs is representative for draft order, the move is to use the normal method of determining order, but base it off of the last 16 games played between 2019-20.

kiimo
Jul 24, 2003

kiimo posted:

I remember the beach football and diving over the wave runner and the idea that he was going to have a covid party but what other dumb poo poo has he done



just remembered at the beginning of July where the state of Florida forced him to cancel his "Funday with LJ'' party that he was gonna throw with hundreds of people. In Florida.

AndrewP
Apr 21, 2010

yeah this was inevitable. Lamar's best friend on the team is Marquise Brown and and AB is his cousin.

Fortunately EDC isn't dumb enough to actually sign him and LJ doesn't appear to be lobbying too hard

JT Jag
Aug 30, 2009

#1 Jaguars Sunk Cost Fallacy-Haver
5 balls for each loss last year, 3 balls for each loss the year before and 1 ball for each loss two years ago.

Nodoze
Aug 17, 2006

If it's only for a night I can live without you

He also died later

Mystic Stylez
Dec 19, 2009

https://twitter.com/ryanmink/status/1288499844563128321

IT'S THE MOOPS

sharknado slashfic
Jun 24, 2011

The Ravens own

wandler20
Nov 13, 2002

How many Championships?
49ers extending John Lynch for 5 years.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



Catfish Noodlin posted:

I think that's got way too high of generating a draft order that's doesn't do a whole hell of a lot for parity. You've got what, a 25-30% chance for a playoff team to get the #1 overall, and then probably a 5-10% chance of a team that both made the playoffs and probably would not draft Trevor Lawrence at #1.

IMO if they play games but don't think what occurs is representative for draft order, the move is to use the normal method of determining order, but base it off of the last 16 games played between 2019-20.

I don't think this draft will be great for parity regardless considering what a complete crapshoot every pick but #1 is looking to be.

That's why I like a fairly random order, because it's closer to an NBA style draft.


JT Jag posted:

5 balls for each loss last year, 3 balls for each loss the year before and 1 ball for each loss two years ago.

That gives us:

109 Bengals 4.75%
106 Giants
101 Washington
97 Cardinals, Lions
92 Dolphins, Jets 4.01%
91 Raiders
90 Browns
89 Jaguars, Buccaneers
87 Panthers
86 Broncos
78 Falcons 3.4%
75 Colts
74 Chargers
67 Bills
65 Cowboys 2.83%
63 Bears
61 Steelers, 49ers
59 Eagles
57 Texans
54 Vikings
51 Packers 2.22%
50 Seahawks
49 Rams
38 Chiefs, Patriots
35 Ravens
29 Saints 1.26%


wandler20 posted:

49ers extending John Lynch for 5 years.

poo poo I didn't know he converted to running back

kalensc
Sep 10, 2003

Only Trust Your Respirator, kupo!
Art/Quote by: Rubby
Use inverse beatpaths to determine the draft order imo

Hamhandler
Aug 9, 2008

[I want to] shit in your fucking mouth. [I'm going to] slap your fucking mouth. [I'm going to] slap your real mother across the face [laughter]. Fuck you, you're still a rookie. I'll kill you.

Kalli posted:

I don't think this draft will be great for parity regardless considering what a complete crapshoot every pick but #1 is looking to be.

That's why I like a fairly random order, because it's closer to an NBA style draft.

If you ran a 2021 draft without another snap of college football, I think you could certainly get through a first day, maybe even a second day of the draft that is a pretty reasonable draft historically. I mean, you could probably like actively gently caress around and draft off of someone's current 2021 mock draft and come up with a better result than like 2009 or 2013.

IMO if you're really concerned about that scenario I think it'd make sense to cancel the 2021 draft, and just basically run an expanded supplemental draft. 2021 draft picks roll over to 2022, and if guys like Trevor Lawrence/Penei Sewell/Micah Parsons/etc. want to declare for the supplemental draft teams can bid for them off of those rules.

Hamhandler fucked around with this message at 19:13 on Jul 29, 2020

Spoeank
Jul 16, 2003

That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

wandler20 posted:

49ers extending John Lynch for 5 years.

Lynch and Shanny 4eva

Manoueverable
Oct 23, 2010

Dubs Loves Wubs
Very annoyed that John Lynch turned out to be a competent GM, let alone a good one.

FUCKFACE MORON
Apr 23, 2010

by sebmojo
Remember when people thought the Niners were out of their minds when they hired a color commentator to be GM?

Hamhandler
Aug 9, 2008

[I want to] shit in your fucking mouth. [I'm going to] slap your fucking mouth. [I'm going to] slap your real mother across the face [laughter]. Fuck you, you're still a rookie. I'll kill you.

Better Than You posted:

Remember when people thought the Niners were out of their minds when they hired a color commentator to be GM?

Yeah seriously the entirety of the guys scouting experience was basically John Elway calling him up and asking him about DBs. Part of his success is certainly having a prior relationship with Kyle Shanahan, but still- it's loving wild and should really upend a lot of what conventional wisdom is about people paying their dues or whatever in terms of personnel poo poo.

nerve
Jan 2, 2011

SKA SUCKS
Is he considered a good gm because they made the super bowl

Sour Diesel
Jan 30, 2010

wandler20
Nov 13, 2002

How many Championships?

nerve posted:

Is he considered a good gm because they made the super bowl

He got a 4th round pick out of the Bucs to move back one spot so the Bucs could draft a guy the 49ers had no interest in.

Jivesauce
Nov 22, 2007

kiimo posted:

In important Mahomes News he got his first big spend item and I approve




https://twitter.com/LRiddickESPN/status/1288170131311525888

This should terrify Mahomes fans. Fortunately Ferrari's electronic driver aids are among the best in the industry, because the capabilities of that car are so far beyond those of the average driver that it might as well be considered a different genre of transportation.

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!
I do not know what melvin is driving

https://twitter.com/Chargers/status/1288254000677044224?s=19

Jivesauce
Nov 22, 2007

That's a Polaris Slingshot. One of those 3-wheel motorcycle-based things. It would also be pretty easy to get yourself killed in, but mainly because of how exposed you are; it is generally considered a motorcycle, so it doesn't have to pass crash tests like a car. It's nowhere near the level of terrifyingly fast as that Ferrari though.

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AndrewP
Apr 21, 2010

pfft Slingshot is 1000% less impressive than rolling to camp in an 812 Superfast

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