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Jose posted:i just tried it and it forces you to give it 6 photos which is tricky when i have no instagram, it only counts facebook profile pictures which are deliberately not me and then stuff on the phone and i don't take many selfies Easy - take a photo of six facets of your head: front, back, left side, right side, top, and bottom. Remove your head for the last one. Vitamin P posted:eugh Yes, and it's a very effective method of manipulation. My brother and uncle both ended up marrying women who played the same card (well, I say ended up, the former has finally divorced after 20~ years of emotional abuse).
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Aug 21, 2020 00:49
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I kept seeing adverts for Hinge so I was immediately put off it. If yall say it's actually decent I might have to give it a try, I've had gently caress-all on OKCupid and half a dozen matches that didn't reply (to one message each, I'm not some kind of pushy weirdo who goes off on people for not begging for my dick in five minutes or less) on Tinder.
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Aug 21, 2020 00:55
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Lady Demelza posted:*Brushes biscuit crumbs off tracksuit bottoms* i am 100% going to regret this but if you're near newcastle lets go on a date lmao
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Aug 21, 2020 00:57
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This evening, my dad declared that he doesn't believe the Kremlin had any involvement in the attempted murder of Alexie Navalny because "it's too obvious; there's no way they'd get away with it". It would be nice to be so blithely ignorant that I could believe that without question. I'd probably also believe that Boris Johnson is actually trying his best right now.
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Aug 21, 2020 01:03
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hinge can gently caress right off
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Aug 21, 2020 02:01
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kingturnip posted:This evening, my dad declared that he doesn't believe the Kremlin had any involvement in the attempted murder of Alexie Navalny because "it's too obvious; there's no way they'd get away with it". To be fair to him, there has never been a time in the entire history of TV crime procedural crime dramas where the obvious initial suspect with means, opportunity and motive has actually been guilty.
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Aug 21, 2020 02:27
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peanut- posted:Small spelling variation or something maybe? No idea, it's weird because the ignoring dots thing is definitely true and has been since Gmail launched. I get messages for xysurname@gmail all the time when my email was registered as xy.surname@gmail back in the early days of it being invite only. big scary monsters posted:Interesting to hear of all the OKC success stories ITT. My experiences with that site were a bunch of dull to disastrous dates with people who were I'm sure were fine but really not a good match for me. My experience with Tinder was actually much better in terms of meeting up with people I found cool and interesting. I had zero responses, started lying on my profile about being outgoing, got two dates neither of which went anywhere because they expected me to be outgoing, then deleted my profile. Plenty of Fish was full of fake profiles, bumble didn't exist and I was too cheap for Match or eHarmony. Then my now wife decided to pursue me and now I am married, a goon story by xy.surname.
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Aug 21, 2020 03:00
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Oh, and companies are now charging exit fees to graduates who try to leave their jobs, effectively creating indentured servitude: https://www.ft.com/content/0164135c-0cfa-4efe-a78b-c2d0e8bdf937 Featuring thread favourite, the Fox of Tsushima himself Jolyon Maugham QC.
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Aug 21, 2020 03:05
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kingturnip posted:This evening, my dad declared that he doesn't believe the Kremlin had any involvement in the attempted murder of Alexie Navalny because "it's too obvious; there's no way they'd get away with it". General thread question: when parents you this dumb poo poo do you just take it? I can understand just not wanting to engage and also finding it difficult to because your eyes have rolled into the back of your head, but I also can't understand what it feels like to have a parent obviously descend into a pit in their mind that they'll never get back out of.
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Aug 21, 2020 03:37
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Jose posted:i am 100% going to regret this but if you're near newcastle lets go on a date lmao Modern romance is wild
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Aug 21, 2020 04:54
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Failed Imagineer posted:Modern romance is wild You love to see young love in the age of SA 
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Aug 21, 2020 05:59
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Bobby Deluxe posted:I signed up for OK Cupid and was immediately enraged because the example text in the favourite films section said Amelie, and I genuinely love that film but couldn't put it down because then I'd look like I was just typing whatever. So I had to say Breakfast Club which is still an interrsting film to talk about but I don't have the same emotional response to it as fuckin Amelie. I was on OK Cupid and Hinge for a few months and got more interest than most men seem to get - judging by a friend who freaked out when he saw my profile. But nowhere near as many as most women who use dating apps: I chatted about it with one of my dates and she showed me her profile with over 2000 likes and 100-odd matches. Dating apps are kind of a losing game though, because especially as a bloke, it ends up being a numbers game with a routine and it makes you cynical and compulsive. If you like someone, you swipe on them; if you match you chat to them; if they reply you keep chatting; if they send you more than a couple of messages, you arrange a date; if your dates go well, you keep seeing them until the dates get stale or you end up in something more serious. It's effectively a sales funnel which values quantity over quality, and everything except that last step would be totally unnecessary with someone you met in real life. I'm in a relationship with someone now but I would rather meet someone in real life than on an app; dating apps are more of a necessary evil than anything else. Purple Prince fucked around with this message at 06:06 on Aug 21, 2020 |
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Aug 21, 2020 06:02
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I read somewhere once about men having that problem. The suggested fix was being way more brutally honest about the more controversial aspects of yourself. Cut the field from 50 maybes to 5 strong yes and 95 strong no kind of thinking. The idea being you still have to get noticed but if someone likes you back or whatever then you've got a far higher chance of it going somewhere. God knows if it's true, I got out the dating game before it was on the play store - thank god - it seems like strange and confusing nightmare reading about it.
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Aug 21, 2020 07:18
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I once made a fake dating site account as a woman and got almost 70 messages in the first hour. That was enough to thoroughly stop me from ever using it. Hopefully I won't have to.
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Aug 21, 2020 07:57
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Cast_No_Shadow posted:I read somewhere once about men having that problem. The suggested fix was being way more brutally honest about the more controversial aspects of yourself. Lol imagine getting 50 interactions of any kind
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Aug 21, 2020 08:34
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Ah man I'd forgotten about the looks you used to get on the 'how did you two meet question' - a lot of people I'm still good friends with hooked up and married off of the Straight Dope messageboard interactions/meet ups back in the early 2000s, including myself. From casually meeting up for a chat ended up in a 4 year long distance relationship that took me across the entire East Coast of the USA twice and behind the scenes in various academic places throughout the UK. She posts on SA too, but don't think I've seen her in this thread. "How have you not been murdered yet?" was a usual response, most of us just said 'oh mutual friends suggested we go on a date' til everyone was online dating from around 2008 and now no-one cares. The idiocy lasses face from thirsty clowns on dating sites was something me and my now girlfriend discussed on our first date, which was along the lines of: Sooooo mannnny dick piccccs the second she agreed to whatsapping rather than POFs clunky messaging system Date that went alright but no spark - guy starts messaging his 'bedroom intentions' while she was still on the bus home. They weren't friendly going by the screenshots she took before blocking him. Two married men dates, where their profile was 'single looking for a long term relationship' and neither of them even bothered to hide they were just there to hook up. So she walked, and fair play to her. The other two I briefly dated from there had similar tales, it must be loving exhausting trawling through all that poo poo. GF even said I was the last attempt she was having at the online thing, she could live without all this crap. But she chose...wisely.
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Aug 21, 2020 08:35
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Bobby Deluxe posted:Oh, and companies are now charging exit fees to graduates who try to leave their jobs, effectively creating indentured servitude: This is absurd, and it’s good that people are challenging it.
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Aug 21, 2020 08:37
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I can't imagine how awful dating apps must be for women, especially stuff like Tinder. It's obviously easier to find someone to actually match with, but knowing that 99% of matches are just creeps or people who desperately swiped yes on every single woman must get you down. The same is true of the whole concept of dating actually. Scrap the lot of it. Everyone should be randomly assigned an appropriate partner at age 18.
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Aug 21, 2020 08:38
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Online dating has suffered from the phenomenon I've just decided to call "geek-lag", where things that were once the preserve of internet shut-ins and nerds go mainstream, but there's a tail of people who didn't get the memo and still make fun of it. See also: talking to people on the internet; playing video games*; having a smartphone (this one seemed to lag for years). So even though online/app dating is perfectly normal now, I think there's still a core of people who think it's a new-fangled invention for saddos. *in this case it's not helped by some original nerds actively resisting the mainstreaming by acting like colossal fuckwits
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Aug 21, 2020 08:51
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Bobby Deluxe posted:Oh, and companies are now charging exit fees to graduates who try to leave their jobs, effectively creating indentured servitude: When my dad were a lad... Apprentices leaving apprenticeships early had to buy out. My dad wanted to leave his after a year to follow a 'calling', not to go to another firm. My grandad had to go and plead on his behalf that he was going to do something completely out of the whole industrial/machining sector he shouldn't have to pay. Eventually the firm did not make him pay. (As a teenager dad wouldn't have the money so it would have fallen on his parents who were not well off either.)
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Aug 21, 2020 09:32
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https://twitter.com/FT/status/1296707046767833088 Hope everyone’s excited for austerity 2.
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Aug 21, 2020 09:36
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Bobby Deluxe posted:Oh, and companies are now charging exit fees to graduates who try to leave their jobs, effectively creating indentured servitude: Paywalled but I know that anywhere that required people to do accountancy exams used to try and do this to recoup the exam costs if you quit just after completing them. I knew someone that did it and they made a big deal about how she'd have to pay back the full amount and blah blah "seriously consider your decision" and then it was like £1k when she was changing to a job that paid 10k more so she just laughed in their faces and told them to get hosed.
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Aug 21, 2020 09:42
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Bobby Deluxe posted:Oh, and companies are now charging exit fees to graduates who try to leave their jobs, effectively creating indentured servitude: Mind quoting for those of us who dont have a FT sub?
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Aug 21, 2020 09:45
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When employment contracts come with exit fees Some graduates who leave their first job early are charged thousands of pounds for ‘training costs’ June 8 2020 When Katie O’Flynn was looking for her first job after graduating, the offer from Sparta Global, an IT contractor, seemed ideal. The company undertook to train Ms O’Flynn as a software tester. It would then place her with clients who wanted her skills. Yet, nine months after she took up the post in January 2017, Ms O’Flynn faced a predicament confronting an increasing number of workers moving on from their first graduate jobs. Having found software testing frustrating and dull, Ms O’Flynn told Sparta she was leaving to study for a masters degree. Sparta first withheld her last month’s pay to cover some of her training costs. Then, after she contacted an employment tribunal about potentially bringing a case to try to recover the money, Sparta confronted her with a bill for a further £16,000 in training costs they said she was still obliged to refund. Ms O’Flynn’s experience reflects the growing popularity of “exit-fee” contracts that seek to tie graduate trainees to employers for a set period, usually two but sometimes as many as four years. Employers operating such schemes require graduates to sign contracts that stipulate that those who depart during the set period have to reimburse training costs — sometimes up to about £20,000 — although at some companies the cost is reduced for the time the employee has already worked. Sparta demanded that Ms O’Flynn pay a partially amortised portion of what they said was £21,600 in training costs — for a three-month course with 30 other people. “They came down very hard on me,” Ms O’Flynn says. Stories such as Ms O’Flynn’s have made exit-fee contracts the latest of a series of controversies over employment practices in the UK. Campaigners, including Tanya de Grunwald, founder of Graduate Fog, a careers website for recent graduates, believe the contracts are unfairly exploitative. Ms de Grunwald says that in recent months exit-fee practices have generated more complaints from her site’s users than any other subject, and graduates have continued to receive warnings and invoices from employers throughout the Covid-19 crisis. “I’m really, really concerned for their mental welfare,” she says of the vulnerable young graduates who contact her. “This just doesn’t feel right.” However, employers that use the contracts defend them as a legitimate way to fund training they might otherwise not be able to offer. Sparta Global says it offers a high-quality grounding in IT. “Sparta’s bespoke programme . . . provides trainees with weeks of dedicated lab-based practical training, created and run by industry experts without any upfront cost,” the company says. The core question is whether the fees are proportionate. Jolyon Maugham, the public-law barrister who founded the campaigning Good Law Project, says there is little doubt the law would let an employer seek reimbursement if a high-flying executive left after it had funded his MBA. “What the law says is that employers can, if acting reasonably, protect a legitimate interest,” Mr Maugham says. Mr Maugham contrasts the case of the MBA executive with the experience of Ms O’Flynn and other exit-fee trainees, who typically receive a number of weeks’ classroom training priced, in most cases, at more than twice the cost of a year’s undergraduate university education. Such demands breach the principle that demands must be proportionate, according to Mr Maugham. “The qualitative difference between those two worlds will be immediately apparent to you,” he says. Mr Maugham says graduates take the risk of signing up to the contracts believing they will receive far better training than is sometimes delivered. He expects, based on previous legal decisions, that the courts would side with the graduates if presented with a clear argument that the contracts were unfair to the employees. However, he is seeking graduates to bring a test case that will make a definitive ruling. Employers challenged on their use of the contracts have mostly forgiven the debt but settled cases out of court, without setting a clear legal precedent, while graduates accept such settlements because, if they took the case to a hearing in a county court and lost, they might have to pay both the exit fee and both sides’ legal costs. “We think that these clauses are clearly unlawful,” Mr Maugham says. “But I cannot say that I’m absolutely certain that that’s so.” Sparta insists most trainees are happy, despite Ms O’Flynn’s frustration. “Sparta is immensely proud that 91 per cent of its graduates remain in the employment of Sparta or their placement clients after completing their two-year programme,” the company says. A graduate who worked for FDM Group, a listed IT developer, says that of his six weeks’ training, one week was devoted to coaching in giving presentations, while another focused on using the Excel spreadsheet system. The software training was “a very basic foundation in programming”, according to the person, who asked not to be named. Mr Maugham estimates that, based on FDM’s annual report, the company is the biggest single user of exit-fee contracts, with 3,000 staff on the agreements at any given time. “A year at university cost me £9,000,” the graduate says. “How does a six-week IT course cost me £20,000?” FDM Group says that it provides “high-quality, classroom-based training”. “Our entire programme of courses was independently reviewed within the last 12 months to ensure full value for our people, in line with industry standards,” the company says. A forthcoming case may clarify some of the issues. Michael Bennett and Charles Day, both former employees of Geeks Ltd, a software developer, have brought a case before South London Employment Tribunal arguing that the company was unreasonable to withhold their last month’s pay when they left during their training periods. The pay was withheld, according to Geeks Ltd, to cover part of the cost of training the two men, which the company puts at £15,800 each. The Good Law Project is backing the men’s action, which was due to be heard on April 28 and 29 but has been postponed until November because of coronavirus restrictions. Mr Bennett says he left after managers failed to respond to his satisfaction to a letter setting out concerns from several trainees. “There was a group letter setting out several reasons why they believed the training was inadequate, both in terms of the number of contact hours, the actual quality of the training and then the cost that they were attributing to it,” he says. Paymon Khamooshi, Geeks Ltd’s technology director, insists the training was to a high standard. He says the company recently won a legal action requiring one former trainee to pay back training costs. He also denies his company’s arrangement counts as an “exit fee”. Geeks Ltd either recovers training costs by writing them off each month as an employee works for Geeks or through seeking repayment if he or she leaves, according to Mr Khamooshi. “The training details and costs are calculated and agreed upon up front,” he says. For many former trainees, meanwhile, the legal picture remains cloudy. Ms O’Flynn, who is currently studying for a Physics PhD at King’s College London, decided against pursuing any legal action but was later offered of an out-of-court settlement. She says Sparta offered to reimburse the withheld salary and issue a declaration that she owed them no more money. But she would have had to drop any legal action. She says she was keener to ensure the company abandoned exit fees than to solve her own problems. As a result, like many other former trainees, she faces the uncertainty of potential new demands that she repay the costs while not being currently pursued for them. Ms O'Flynn says she wants the company to say it will “never do it again”. “I turned down the offer,” she says. “I wouldn’t have done that if I didn’t think there was an injustice.”
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Aug 21, 2020 09:51
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Bobby Deluxe posted:Oh, and companies are now charging exit fees to graduates who try to leave their jobs, effectively creating indentured servitude: Uh, is that even legal? My old job in Israel threatened this all the time "to recoup training costs" but never once acted on it. It was always manager's discretion or just not following through because you're not allowed to fine employees in Israel. Garnishing wages is a court thing, not a thing corporations can do.
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Aug 21, 2020 09:52
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It happens kinda in the NHS as well if the course you've been sent on is expensive enough. It's just that the burden of paying those costs usually lies with whoever you go to work for next (and I'm not aware of anyone who completes a course and then leaves work altogether shortly afterwards). On a different note, loving hell this is grim: quote:A mother who left her dying daughter at home while she went to a pub has pleaded guilty to neglect. Pub staff see a grubby, malnourished 13-year old coming in looking for her mum, but apparently keep letting her mum drink there anyway, even after she told them she'd locked her child in the house so she couldn't get away. kingturnip fucked around with this message at 10:08 on Aug 21, 2020 |
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Aug 21, 2020 10:01
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Paging Miftan.
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Aug 21, 2020 10:06
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stev posted:I can't imagine how awful dating apps must be for women, especially stuff like Tinder. It's obviously easier to find someone to actually match with, but knowing that 99% of matches are just creeps or people who desperately swiped yes on every single woman must get you down. Contrapoints had a Good bit where she talked about the diff between being a woman and man on online dating and phrased it as "an avalanche of bad dick vs a barren wasteland" and decided on average she prefers the bad dick
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Aug 21, 2020 10:10
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Lol I think it's pretty telling that there still hasnt been an actual court case and the companies continually settle and agree to forget about it. Absolute scum though.
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Aug 21, 2020 10:13
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if you're moving into another job then they'll pay for the training as long as you're up front to them about it. provided that it's a bona fide useful certificate/qualification for them. like an accounting qual they would've paid for you to go on if you're working for them already. (no such luck if you're abandoning your previous for a career change) there is a problem of massively over inflated course fees being quoted for certs that aren't worth the paper they're printed on that are really just a way to disguise what's actually an illegal exit fee. if you had the resources to go to court they wouldn't stand up. hence the company quoted at the end of the article offering to settle. but if the company had spent genuine money on your qual which you're now taking elsewhere, you can bet it'd hold up. as far as they're concerned running off the with MBA one month after graduation is like saying you want to keep the company car.
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Aug 21, 2020 10:14
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I think it’s fairly common for companies to try and claw back costs for a training course if you leave shortly afterwards. I did a £2k course a couple years ago and they tried to get me to sign a thing saying I would pay it back if I left within 12 months. Of course I didn’t sign it and they forgot about it though. The company quoted in that article is taking the piss though.
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Aug 21, 2020 10:18
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Guavanaut posted:Paging Miftan. 
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Aug 21, 2020 10:34
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Do you have to repay the "training fees" if you get sacked, too?
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Aug 21, 2020 10:36
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Also lol Sanitary Naptime, your editing arm must have been getting tired this episode of Podcasting is Praxis. I appreciate the comedy timing and music.
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Aug 21, 2020 10:46
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The other scummy thing not mentioned in that article is that trainees are often expected to perform the duties of a fully trained or qualified person while still on a trainee's salary. Get the graduate in, give them 6 weeks of training (and loving lol as if that comes to 20 grand or whatever - more likely a self-directed distance learning thing at a couple grand a head), and then they're tied in for years, doing the same job as their superiors for less pay.
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Aug 21, 2020 10:51
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Wachter posted:The other scummy thing not mentioned in that article is that trainees are often expected to perform the duties of a fully trained or qualified person while still on a trainee's salary. Get the graduate in, give them 6 weeks of training (and loving lol as if that comes to 20 grand or whatever - more likely a self-directed distance learning thing at a couple grand a head), and then they're tied in for years, doing the same job as their superiors for less pay. A few years ago, I started at a job alongside a guy who was there on an apprenticeship, we had the same amount of experience in coding. A year later I decided I hated the job and my manager, so I left, but got talking to the apprentice guy in the run up to leaving. They'd just got him onto the "next level" of the apprenticeship qualifications stuff rather than giving him a normal job when his initial one finished. We were on the same project, doing the same work, had been working as software devs for the same length of time (3 years or so), but his salary was about half of mine.
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Aug 21, 2020 10:54
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Surprise T Rex posted:A few years ago, I started at a job alongside a guy who was there on an apprenticeship, we had the same amount of experience in coding. A year later I decided I hated the job and my manager, so I left, but got talking to the apprentice guy in the run up to leaving. They'd just got him onto the "next level" of the apprenticeship qualifications stuff rather than giving him a normal job when his initial one finished. As a student around 1980 I had a 3 month summer vacation job as a care assistant - pay around £60 per week fulltime. There was a 17yr old girl there on the Youth Opportunity Scheme (or possibly YTS whichever it was at the time) getting £23 for the same full time job only difference she had fixed hours not shifts. A permanent vacancy came up and she applied and they told her she was too young (to do the job she'd been doing for 6 months on 1/3 the pay).
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Aug 21, 2020 11:02
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Bobby Deluxe posted:How the gently caress is that supposed to work, does it send it to both inboxes? Does it just randomly pick one? The example that link gives makes no goddamn sense. xysurname is xysurname. xy.surname is xysurname. x.y.surname is xysurname. xy.sur.name is xysurname. Gmail just strips certain characters from the email address and internally handles the address as if it doesn't have any of those, then displays it as whatever was originally registered.
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Aug 21, 2020 11:13
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big scary monsters posted:Do you have to repay the "training fees" if you get sacked, too? Nobody addressed this but possibly yes, depending on the contract. And you can only challenge it in court to the extent that it is overvalued, and even then it's up to the court if you will be required to pay the whole sum or not (though it might be in installments if you can't pay). Also a judgement against you goes on your credit report. More info here from the charity referenced in the article: Graduate 'exit fees' advice. The article is fairly upbeat but it boils down to "if they care enough you'll probably have to pay".
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Aug 21, 2020 11:14
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peanut- posted:https://twitter.com/FT/status/1296707046767833088 This would require Austerity 1 to have ended
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