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Hockles posted:
But what if you traded us all to make one Goon Mega Team? Just make the spare goalies play D, it's basically the same thing.
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Aug 21, 2020 01:13
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Wait, we can ask for things to happen to our players? Alexi ain't been doing poo poo the last couple of years, make something happen!
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Aug 21, 2020 01:19
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Hockles take a bribe already, geeze....
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Aug 21, 2020 01:23
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Cocaine Bear posted:But what if you traded us all to make one Goon Mega Team? Just make the spare goalies play D, it's basically the same thing. That is Pleads' territory. He is the General Manager of the Pylons. It's up to him if we ever bring that back. Here is what he did in that vein, like 9 years ago -- https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3411847 Nocheez posted:Wait, we can ask for things to happen to our players? Alexi ain't been doing poo poo the last couple of years, make something happen! No. I mean, I could trade you to the team I am controlling, but that doesn't really mean it will help anything. Plus, I want it to be natural what happens.
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Aug 21, 2020 01:27
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2026-27 All-Star Break Update    All-Stars Stabby McStabson (Pacific Division) - 4th selection Keith RePrimeau (Pacific Division) - 1st selection Cam Stevenson Jr (Central Division) - 1st selection Soup Van Buren (Atlantic Division) - 4th selection Hockles (Atlantic Division) - 4th selection DJ Exile (Atlantic Division) - 2nd selection Illusive Wang (Metropolitan Division) - 2nd selection Aye Donks - AHL All-Star Game (North Division) - 3rd selection Transaction News 10/11/26 - CBJ called up Dick Glynnenstein from Cleveland (AHL) Keen Jelly did not accept his qualifying offer by Dec. 1st, so he is now sitting out the entire season. Maybe he is over in Russia living in the same loft that Egon Hyundai was in. Comments Hockles missed a few weeks with an Abdominal Strain, then is out for 2 months with an MCL sprain Adam Banks missed a few weeks with a Sprained Ankle Phu Barr will be out until April with Post Concussion Syndrome https://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2020 for complete stats
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Aug 21, 2020 01:40
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YEAH KEITH
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Aug 21, 2020 01:46
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Hell yeah, finally.
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Aug 21, 2020 02:05
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2026-27 Trade Deadline Update    Transaction News STL - signed Max Power to a $9.6mil/3yr contract extension ($3.19mil/yr). It takes effect starting with the 2027-28 season Comments Potatoes O'Bourke will be out until mid April with a Broken Rib Charles Dollfan will be out until mid April with a Fractured Ankle https://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2020 for complete stats
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Aug 21, 2020 02:44
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Jørgen may actually be one of the most wasted scoring talents of the generation. 20+ goals every season he's played, guy can fuckin rip it, but he spends thousands of minutes in the box and limits his ice time. Perfect for the trashmen in Colorado.
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Aug 21, 2020 03:36
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here lies st louis dead last
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Aug 21, 2020 03:39
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Hockles posted:Phu Barr will be out until April with Post Concussion Syndrome In a contract year?! Press F for Phu 
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Aug 21, 2020 04:59
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Hockles posted:2026-27 Trade Deadline Update I'm just going to assume these are related.
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Aug 21, 2020 07:02
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Pink Whitney strikes again
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Aug 21, 2020 07:15
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End of 2026-27 Regular Season Update    Transaction News None Comments Stijn Hort missed a couple weeks with a bruised hand Potatoes O'Bourke recovered from his broken rib, but at the time of the update he is injured again. It hasn't been determined what it is yet. Soup Van Buren lead the league in points and goals, so he will likely be winning some awards this season Same crew are at the top of the PIM list. Max Power joins them this season, as well as a game generated player at #2 with 191 PIM. He is also an Enforcer that was drafted in '24, so he will be up there annually I bet. DJ Exile might win the Vezina, but it would be an upset https://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2020 for complete stats
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Aug 21, 2020 07:25
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Soup has 113 points this season and Detroit doesn't make the playoffs. GM should get me some goon FA help over here.
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Aug 21, 2020 07:58
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Pleads posted:Jørgen may actually be one of the most wasted scoring talents of the generation. 40 goals, 276 PIM, 41 fights. Jørgen is a loving renaissance man.
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Aug 21, 2020 16:35
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Columbus suuuuucks
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Aug 21, 2020 16:51
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Athanatos posted:
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Aug 21, 2020 17:04
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End of 2026-27 Season Update  NHL Playoff Tree  AHL Playoff Tree  NHL Awards Stanley Cup Champions Ottawa Senators Presidents Trophy (Best Regular Season Record) Philadelphia Flyers Art Ross Trophy (Most Points) Soup Van Buren - Detroit Red Wings Hart Memorial Trophy (League MVP) Soup Van Buren - Detroit Red Wings James Norris Memorial Trophy (Best Defenseman) Rasmus Dahlin - Buffalo Sabres Lady Byng Memorial Trophy (Best Sportsmanship & Gentlemanly Conduct) Stabby McStabson - Los Angeles Kings Calder Memorial Trophy (Rookie of the Year) Harrison Wotton - New York Islanders Conn Smythe Trophy (Playoff MVP) Tucker Tynan - Ottawa Senators Vezina Trophy (Best Goaltender) Carter Hart - Philadelphia Flyers William M. Jennings Trophy (Goalie(s) on team with fewest Goals Against) Carter Hart - Philadelphia Flyers Bill Masterton Memorial Trophy (Perserverence, Sportsmanship & Dedication to hockey) Bowen Byram - Colorado Avalanche Frank J. Selke Trophy (Best Defensive Forward) Ryan O'Reilly - St. Louis Blues Ted Lindsay Award (League MVP as voted by NHLPA) Soup Van Buren - Detroit Red Wings Maurice "Rocket" Richard Trophy (Most Goals) Soup Van Buren - Detroit Red Wings Upcoming Free Agents ANA - Keen Jelly (RFA) BUF - DJ Exile (RFA) COL - Charles Dollfan (UFA) COL - Prep Hemlock (RFA) CBJ - Dick Glynnenstein (UFA) DET - Alexi Mouskovitch (RFA) DET - Soup Van Buren (RFA) FLA - Pebis Bepis (RFA) NYR - Egon Hyundai (RFA) OTT - Aye Donks (RFA) OTT - Hockles (RFA) SJ -- Phu Barr (UFA) Comments Potatoes O'Bourke re-aggravated his Broken rib, and was out for over a month Hockles wins the Stanley Cup! Soup Van Buren does win a bunch of hardware this year Stabby McStabson is the Lady Byng winner for this year as well Aye Donks wins the AHL Trophies for MVP, Points, and Goals! We have a few Unrestricted Free Agents, so either their team offers them a contract or they hit free agency. No more qualifying offers to retain the rights. https://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2020 for complete stats
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Aug 21, 2020 19:10
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god calgary fuckin sucks
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Aug 21, 2020 19:27
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aunt jenkins posted:Pink Whitney strikes again
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Aug 21, 2020 19:44
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it is unbelievable that the Senators have held off this long on promoting the Donksmith.
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Aug 21, 2020 20:09
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If Hemlock and Dollfan leave I will riot.
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Aug 21, 2020 20:39
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I had almost as many games played in the playoffs as in the regular season
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Aug 21, 2020 20:46
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Isles perennially stuck in the first round
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Aug 22, 2020 03:39
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2027 Offseason News Notable Retirements Claude Giroux Ryan O'Reilly Brad Marchand Jordan Staal Roman Josi Cam Atkinson PK Subban TJ Brodie Ryan McDonagh Justin Schultz Jake Gardiner Nate Schmidt Carey Price Sergei Bobrovsky Semyon Varlamov Darcy Kuemper Antti Raanta Jake Allen Full lists -- https://imgur.com/a/gCGMf1J Notable Free Agent signings John Morrow (90 OVR) signed a 7 year contract with BOS John Tavares (87 OVR) signed a 1 year contract with SJ Max Pacioretty (86 OVR) signed a 2 year contract with TOR Connor Brown (86 OVR) signed a 3 year contract with STL William Karlsson (86 OVR) signed a 1 year contract with PHI Brendan Perlini (86 OVR) signed a 3 year contract with CBJ Ilya Samsonsov (86 OVR) signed a 5 year contract with NJ Igor Shesterkin (85 OVR) signed a 1 year contract with CHI Mackenzie Blackwood (84 OVR) signed a 4 year contract with VAN Transactions OTT gets: Alexis Lafrenière (90 OVR), 2028 3rd Round Pick SEA gets: Hockles (87 OVR), N. Niederreiter (80 OVR) EDM - signed Phu Barr to a $880k/1yr contract OTT - signed Charles Dollfan to a $2.95mil/1yr contract PIT - Soup Van Buren signed an offer sheet from PIT for a $105.9mil/7yr contract ($15.125mil per year). Detroit did not match the offer, so they get PIT's 1st round picks for the next 4 years TOR - DJ Exile signed offer sheet from TOR for a $64.9mil/7yr contract ($9.265mil per year). Buffalo did not match the offer, so they get BUF's 1st round picks for the next 4 years ANA - re-signed Keen Jelly to a $3.19mil/1yr contract COL - re-signed Prep Hemlock to a ($2.115mil per year) CBJ - re-signed Dick Glynnenstein to a $890k/1yr contract DET - re-signed Alexi Mouskovitch to a $1.6mil/1yr contract FLA - re-signed Pebis Bepis to a $7.77mil/2yr contract ($3.885mil per year) NYR - re-signed Egon Hyundai to a $13.5mil/2yr contract ($6.765mil per year) OTT - re-signed Aye Donks to a $1.6mil/2yr contract ($830k per year) SEA - re-signed Hockles to a $57.6mil/4yr contract ($14.4mil per year) Contracts ANA - Adam Banks has 3 years left on their $53.6mil/6yr contract ANA - Keen Jelly has 1 year left on their $3.19mil/1yr contract CGY - Keith RePrimeau has 1 years left on their $41.6mil/4yr contract CHI - Potatoes O'Bourke has 1 years left on their $13.9mil/3yr contract COL - Prep Hemlock has 2 years left on their $4.2mil/2yr contract COL - Jørgen Jørgensen has 1 year left on their $14.2mil/2yr contract CBJ - Stijn Hort has 2 years left on their $26.6mil/4yr contract CBJ -- Dick Glynnenstein has 1 year left on their $890k/1yr contract DET - Alexi Mouskovitch has 1 year left on their $1.6mil/1yr contract EDM -- Phu Barr has 1 year left on their $800k/1yr contract FLA - Pebis Bepis has 2 years left on their $7.77mil/2yr contract LA -- Stabby McStabson has 2 years left on their $29.6mil/3yr contract LA -- Tom Nook has 1 year left on their $13.65mil/2yr contract MIN - Cam Stevenson Jr has 1 year left on their $12.9mil/2yr contract NYI - Illusive Wang has 6 years left on their $73.8mil/8yr contract NYR - Egon Hyundai has 2 years left on their $13.5mil/2yr contract OTT - Charles Dollfan has 1 year left on their $2.95mil/1yr contract OTT - Aye Donks has 2 years left on their $1.6mil/2yr contract PHI - Pierre Delecto has 4 years left on their $30mil/5yr contract PIT - Soup Van Buren has 7 years left on their $105.9mil/7yr contract SJ -- Ergo Hogfather has 1 year left on their $5.23mil/2yr contract SEA - Hockles has 4 years left on their $57.6mil/4yr contract STL - Max Power has 3 years left on their $9.6mil/3yr contract TOR - DJ Exile has 7 years left on their $64.9mil/7yr contract VAN - Large Adult Son has 2 years left on their $4.5mil/3yr contract Top 10 Salaries #1 -- Soup Van Buren (PIT) -- $15.125mil/yr #2 -- Hockles (SEA) -- $14.400mil/yr #3 -- Artemi Panarin (NYR) -- $11.895mil/yr #4 -- Elias Pettersson (VAN) -- $11.875mil/yr #5 -- Nathan MacKinnon (VGK) -- $11.790mil/yr #6 -- Kailer Yamamoto (WSH) -- $11.785mil/yr #7 -- Leon Draisaitl (EDM) -- $11.740mil/yr #8 -- Isac Lundström (ANA) -- $11.690mil/yr #9 -- Zach Werenski (CBJ) -- $11.600mil/yr #10 -- Mark Scheifele (WPG) -- $11.550mil/yr Top 5 Goalie Salaries #1 -- Carter Hart (PHI) $9.455mil/yr #2 -- DJ Exile (TOR) -- $9.265mil/yr #3 -- Joonas Korpisalo (CBJ) -- $8.735mil/yr #4 -- Thatcher Demko (CAR) -- $8.370mil/yr #5 -- Matt Murray (PIT) -- $8.240mil/yr Comments What the gently caress happened this offseason!?! Hockles fucked around with this message at 08:57 on Aug 22, 2020 |
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Aug 22, 2020 08:53
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There was Chaos. And it was Good.
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Aug 22, 2020 08:55
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gently caress YOU DOLLFAN take me with you
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Aug 22, 2020 09:09
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A full page ad appears in a Silicon Valley newpaper:code:
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Aug 22, 2020 18:21
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oh wow you finally call me up and you make the playoffs for the first time ever and i scored almost 20 goals in half a season while getting 10 min a night 
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Aug 23, 2020 01:50
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2027-28 Opening Night Starting Lineups ANA - Adam Banks (88 OVR) is the Starting RW ANA - Keen Jelly (83 OVR) is the 3rd Line RW CGY - Keith RePrimeau (95 OVR) is the Starting Center CHI - Potatoes O'Bourke ( 84 OVR) is on the 2nd D Pairing COL - Prep Hemlock (81 OVR) is the 4th Line RW COL - Jørgen Jørgensen (90 OVR) is the Starting RW CBJ - Stijn Hort (90 OVR) is the Starting LW CBJ - assigned Dick Glynnenstein (78 OVR) to Cleveland (AHL), he is on the Top D Pairing DET - Alexi Mouskovitch (82 OVR) is the 4th Line RW EDM - assigned Phu Barr (76 OVR) to Bakersfield (AHL), he is the Starting Center FLA - Pebis Bepis (80 OVR) is a healthy scratch. LA -- Stabby McStabson (92 OVR) is the Starting Center LA -- Tom Nook (86 OVR) is the Starting Goaltender MIN - Cam Stevenson Jr (86 OVR) is the Starting Goaltender NYI - Illusive Wang (91 OVR) is the Starting LW NYR - Egon Hyundai (89 OVR) is the Starting Goaltender OTT - Charles Dollfan (84 OVR) is the 2nd Line LW OTT - assigned Aye Donks (78 OVR) to Belleville (AHL), he is the starting LW PHI - Pierre Delecto (85 OVR) is on the Top D Pairing PIT - Soup Van Buren (94 OVR) is the Starting LW SJ -- Ergo Hogfather (84 OVR) is the 4th Line LW SEA - Hockles (87 OVR) is on the Top D Pairing STL - Max Power (83 OVR) is the 4th Line LW TOR - DJ Exile (89 OVR) is the Starting Goaltender VAN - Large Adult Son (82 OVR) is the 4th Line LW Comments I was going to do the full lines again, but I think I am already sick of the full lineups. So, I am just going to roll these into the offseason updates going forward. The full lineups took me like 3+ hours to do. Gonna pass on doing that again.
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Aug 23, 2020 06:07
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You're doing a great job and it kicks rear end.
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Aug 23, 2020 06:33
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Cocaine Bear posted:You're doing a great job and it kicks rear end.
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Aug 23, 2020 06:41
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Cocaine Bear posted:You're doing a great job and it kicks rear end. unlike the Islanders, who it turns out cannot just rely on one left winger
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Aug 23, 2020 06:45
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gently caress you San Jose, I did fine on the third line.
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Aug 23, 2020 06:53
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Unlike Large Adult Son, you are highly valued, Hockles!
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Aug 23, 2020 07:27
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disband the panthers
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Aug 24, 2020 01:16
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2027-28 All-Star Break Update    All-Stars Stabby McStabson (Pacific Division) - 5th selection Hockles (Pacific Division) - 5th selection Cam Stevenson Jr (Central Division) - 2nd selection DJ Exile (Atlantic Division) - 3rd selection Stijin Hort (Metropolitan Division) - 1st selection Soup Van Buren (Metropolitan Division) - 5th selection Illusive Wang (Metropolitan Division) - 3rd selection Egon Hyundai (Metropolitan Division) - 1st selection Phu Barr - AHL All-Star Game (Pacific Division) - 1st selection Transaction News 11/10/27 MTL gets: Aye Donks, a prospect OTT gets: 2028 4th Round pick, a prospect Comments Well, MTL traded for Donks and immediately put him in the NHL, on the 3rd Line. Lets see if he stays there. Pebis Bepis, however.... Adam Banks missed a cuple weeks with a Bruised Wrist Tom Nook missed a few weeks with a Strained Hamstring Potatoes O'Bourke missed about a couple months with a Fractured Left Elbow  GOALIE GOAL -- Tom Nook scored a goal. I have no context for how or when it happened, but it happened.https://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2020 for complete stats
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Aug 24, 2020 02:46
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Cocaine Bear posted:You're doing a great job and it kicks rear end.
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Aug 24, 2020 03:12
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Colorado isn't doing the yo-yo'ing they did the last time, ugh. Just misery at the bottom.
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Aug 24, 2020 03:22
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