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Vincent Van Goatse
Nov 8, 2006

Enjoy every sandwich.

Smellrose

Phobeste posted:

It's good to be a patriots fan OP

Lies this big are a crime before God and the world, other OP.

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fartknocker
Oct 28, 2012


Damn it, this always happens. I think I'm gonna score, and then I never score. It's not fair.



Wedge Regret
gently caress the Patriots

fsif
Jul 18, 2003

Going to be so pissed if the Patriots end up being pretty good season.

Ehud
Sep 19, 2003

football.

fsif posted:

Going to be so pissed if the Patriots end up being pretty good season.

I just assume they're winning the AFC East :shrug:

that will be my assumption until they don't win it


and their cheating rear end coach is gone

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



Ooof

https://twitter.com/FourVerts/status/1303339873508691969

I mean granted it's for that whole armed robbery thing, but still, oof.

fartknocker
Oct 28, 2012


Damn it, this always happens. I think I'm gonna score, and then I never score. It's not fair.



Wedge Regret
I honestly thought they did that months ago when the news came out.

D-LINK
Oct 1, 2007

I was talking to peachy Peach about kissy Kiss. He bought me a soda.

Cthulu Carl posted:

Given all the possible universes in which news of the sexual proclivities of famous people breaks, an athlete saying "don't shower and take pics pooping" to a lady and the lady going " hell I'll take a video and try to makes it sexy" is down right refreshing and heart-warming.

How about "no," Scott

FizFashizzle
Mar 30, 2005








https://twitter.com/SorryAmigos/status/1303163195666976770?s=20

Rectal Placenta
Feb 25, 2011

Cthulu Carl posted:

Given all the possible universes in which news of the sexual proclivities of famous people breaks, an athlete saying "don't shower and take pics pooping" to a lady and the lady going " hell I'll take a video and try to makes it sexy" is down right refreshing and heart-warming.

Lighting some candles and scattering rose petals across the tarp to bring romance back into amateur doodoo porn

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!
Man Cleveland groupies are really trying to do their part to keep players out of town.

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 10, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.

fsif posted:

Going to be so pissed if the Patriots end up being pretty good season.

6-10 at best IMO

seiferguy
Jun 9, 2005

FLAWED
INTUITION



Toilet Rascal
i will not kinkshame Odell Beckham Junior, a talented wide receiver for the Cleveland Browns.

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!
If Cam actually has a functional shoulder, and they can assemble some kind of offense out of spare parts, I'd put them at like eight wins max. No way they take the division unless the Bills and Dolphins completely faceplant.

I think 4-6 wins is more likely.

D-LINK
Oct 1, 2007

I was talking to peachy Peach about kissy Kiss. He bought me a soda.

seiferguy posted:

i will not kinkshame Odell Beckham Junior, a talented wide receiver for the Cleveland Browns.

The Marquis de Sade was imprisoned in the Bastille for degenerate poop play, the world has come a long way

wandler20
Nov 13, 2002

How many Championships?
https://twitter.com/RossTuckerNFL/status/1303344281885847553?s=20

drat, Rosen is younger than Joe Burrow. Seems like he's been in the league for 5 years already.

wandler20 fucked around with this message at 16:38 on Sep 8, 2020

Grittybeard
Mar 29, 2010

Bad, very bad!

wandler20 posted:

drat, Rosen is younger than Joe Burrow. Seems like he's been in the league for 5 years already.

Who was the last 5th year senior who transferred who ended up as the #1 overall?

I mean I have done zero thinking about this so it might have been 2019 for all I know. e: Nope Kyler was a junior who transferred.

Predictably it hasn't been that long, Baker Mayfield.

Grittybeard
Mar 29, 2010

Bad, very bad!
Last non-quarterback 5th year senior has been a bit though (largely because so many QBs go #1 overall). Unless I've made a mistake with Eric Fisher it's Jake Long from the 2008 draft. I guess from my own question I'd have to look further to find a transfer though.

I think I might be wrong here anyway? If so I'm back to Steve Emtman before giving up. And man there's a whole lot of bad QBs picked first overall with the occasional Peyton in there.

Grittybeard fucked around with this message at 17:06 on Sep 8, 2020

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005

bone shaking.
soul baking.
Pats aren't losing more than 6 games this year. Tom Brady didn't win them those superbowls. The head coach and front office are the best cheaters in the league and losing an over the hill game manager isn't going to cause them to suddenly disappear.

They only lost 5 games the year Matt Cassel had to take over during game 1.

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 10, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.

Mr. Nice! posted:

Pats aren't losing more than 6 games this year. Tom Brady didn't win them those superbowls. The head coach and front office are the best cheaters in the league and losing an over the hill game manager isn't going to cause them to suddenly disappear.

They only lost 5 games the year Matt Cassel had to take over during game 1.

Look up the 2008 Pats roster and their schedule that year and compare it to both this year.

three
Aug 9, 2007

i fantasize about ndamukong suh licking my doodoo hole
I'm buying NFL Sunday Ticket strictly to watch Cam and the Patriots this year. It's going to be loving great.

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005

bone shaking.
soul baking.

Shimrra Jamaane posted:

Look up the 2008 Pats roster and their schedule that year and compare it to both this year.

I don't know who the pats play in total, but i know they have 6 games against the AFCE and going 50/50 with the remaining games will put them at 11-5.

e: fixed some math

Mr. Nice! fucked around with this message at 17:24 on Sep 8, 2020

Slowpoke!
Feb 12, 2008

ANIME IS FOR ADULTS

Jiminy Christmas! Shoes! posted:

If Cam actually has a functional shoulder, and they can assemble some kind of offense out of spare parts, I'd put them at like eight wins max. No way they take the division unless the Bills and Dolphins completely faceplant.

I think 4-6 wins is more likely.

I thought the Dolphins were still going to be garbage this year. They unloaded all of their decent players, even ones you would keep through a rebuild like Tunsil and Fitzpatrick. And Ryan Fitzpatrick is definitely going to win them some games and lose them some games before they inevitably start Tua in week 15.

Bills might be competitive but I can totally see the Pats winning the division.

Amy Pole Her
Jun 17, 2002

Slowpoke! posted:

I thought the Dolphins were still going to be garbage this year. They unloaded all of their decent players, even ones you would keep through a rebuild like Tunsil and Fitzpatrick. And Ryan Fitzpatrick is definitely going to win them some games and lose them some games before they inevitably start Tua in week 15.

Bills might be competitive but I can totally see the Pats winning the division.

What players did Miami lose that they didn’t immediately replace with higher quality players?

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 10, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.
Miami will probably be adequate.

coronavirus
Jan 27, 2020

by Cyrano4747

seiferguy posted:

i will not kinkshame Odell Beckham Junior, a talented wide receiver for the Cleveland Browns.

Is it really "kinkshaming" when the kink is a literal health & safety hazard?


Am I too late to post about how this season I am only going to be cheering for the Cleveland Steamers?

coronavirus fucked around with this message at 17:25 on Sep 8, 2020

Whooping Crabs
Apr 13, 2010

Sorry for the derail but I fuckin love me some racoons
https://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/29836651/sources-saints-alvin-kamara-extremely-close-lucrative-extension
Saints are already $71 million over the cap in 2021 so I don't know how this is possible. It feels like the Saints have been in cap hell forever so I wonder if there's some shenanigans going on.

three
Aug 9, 2007

i fantasize about ndamukong suh licking my doodoo hole
"This is it, this is the year Miami and Buffalo win the division!" is an evergreen post in these here forums for years.

tarbrush
Feb 7, 2011

ALL ABOARD THE SCOTLAND HYPE TRAIN!

CHOO CHOO
Miami will once again start badly and finish strong. Most of their draft picks are low floor high ceiling guys who will need some coaching and they've turned over 50% of the roster.

That said, they can now field an above practice squad level player at every position, which they couldn't last year.

Hot Diggity!
Apr 3, 2010

SKELITON_BRINGING_U_ON.GIF
The Patriots will continue to cheat, because they're cheaters.

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005

bone shaking.
soul baking.

Hot Diggity! posted:

The Patriots will continue to cheat, because they're cheaters.

They're the best cheaters, too. The Bucs are going to wish they had Winston back when Tom starts noodle arming throws around game 4 because he's just too old to keep up with the game anymore.

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!

Mr. Nice! posted:

Pats aren't losing more than 6 games this year. Tom Brady didn't win them those superbowls. The head coach and front office are the best cheaters in the league and losing an over the hill game manager isn't going to cause them to suddenly disappear.

They only lost 5 games the year Matt Cassel had to take over during game 1.

Night and day in terms of roster and schedule.

The defense is missing a bunch of players from the front seven who either opted out or they let walk in free agency. The offense has no running game to speak of, no tight ends and the only real receiver is a crusty old Edelman. Even their kicking game is going to be awful! It's gonna be pretty ugly.

Hamhandler
Aug 9, 2008

[I want to] shit in your fucking mouth. [I'm going to] slap your fucking mouth. [I'm going to] slap your real mother across the face [laughter]. Fuck you, you're still a rookie. I'll kill you.

Mr. Nice! posted:

Pats aren't losing more than 6 games this year. Tom Brady didn't win them those superbowls. The head coach and front office are the best cheaters in the league and losing an over the hill game manager isn't going to cause them to suddenly disappear.

They only lost 5 games the year Matt Cassel had to take over during game 1.

https://twitter.com/MarkDanielsPJ/status/1303365381717884928

That depth chart is... a work in progress. You always expect them to overachieve, but they're pretty clearly rebuilding on some level.

Silly Burrito
Nov 27, 2007

SET A COURSE FOR
THE FLAVOR QUADRANT

Whooping Crabs posted:

https://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/29836651/sources-saints-alvin-kamara-extremely-close-lucrative-extension
Saints are already $71 million over the cap in 2021 so I don't know how this is possible. It feels like the Saints have been in cap hell forever so I wonder if there's some shenanigans going on.

The Saints have a very good GM who knows how to squeeze the salary cap for all it is worth.

three
Aug 9, 2007

i fantasize about ndamukong suh licking my doodoo hole

Silly Burrito posted:

The Saints have a very good GM who knows how to squeeze the salary cap for all it is worth.

Every good team cheats. Patriots cheat on the field. Saints cheat in salary cap.

Cheaters always prosper.

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005

bone shaking.
soul baking.
Y'all gonna see some crazy offense out of Cam with the pats, and Bill is the best defensive coach in football.


Maybe it has been highlighted for me because the games against the Garrett lead cowboys are some of the best examples of Belichick's coaching acumen, but he is head and shoulder's above the rest of the league.

I think you give Belichick any active roster and he gets 9 wins out of them.

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!
Jason Garrett made most of his opponents look like geniuses in comparison.

Hot Diggity!
Apr 3, 2010

SKELITON_BRINGING_U_ON.GIF
Wowza

https://twitter.com/RapSheet/status/1303370625009020929

Have fun paying for receivers that are up for extensions!

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 10, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.
Hopkins just signed a 2 year 54 mil extension. Jesus Christ no receiver is worth that.

Silly Burrito
Nov 27, 2007

SET A COURSE FOR
THE FLAVOR QUADRANT

three posted:

Every good team cheats. Patriots cheat on the field. Saints cheat in salary cap.

Cheaters always prosper.

How do you cheat the salary cap if you play by the rules that are set?

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Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



.... huh

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