[Dune Thread] Gundam Idaho

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phasmid: Jan 16, 2015; Booty Shaker
SILENT MAJORITY

steinrokkan posted:

Let's just say I might consider the possibility you are human if you watch the whole ad without skipping after five seconds

I feel like the dashvid in my car will say this to me within ~10 years.

juggalo baby coffin posted:

we've created a new app called gomjabbr which uses cutting edge data science and machine learning to kill only animals

lol

# ? Sep 29, 2020 00:35

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# ? May 29, 2024 23:31

Posthuman: Jan 10, 2005; I give all those dicks and cocks sir

I don't get this reference. What happened with Vinge?

I had a real beefswelling for his early works, the "Across Realtime" series and the "Fire Upon the Deep" and "A Deepness in the Sky" books. Not so much for "Rainbow's End" or "Children of the Sky".

# ? Sep 29, 2020 01:36

euphronius: Feb 18, 2009

Posthuman posted:

I don't get this reference. What happened with Vinge?

I had a real beefswelling for his early works, the "Across Realtime" series and the "Fire Upon the Deep" and "A Deepness in the Sky" books. Not so much for "Rainbow's End" or "Children of the Sky".

He started writing fascist garbage

# ? Sep 29, 2020 01:41

I dont know: Aug 9, 2003; That Guy here...

Mode 7 posted:

I mean yeah you could do something interesting with the Butlerian Jihad or you could just have this

Amazing. That is exactly what I expected it would be, and still somehow surprisingly trite.

Edit: Those names are thing of sublime stupidity. Actually naming your protaganist Serena Butler, in the Butlerian Jihad books is amazing. However, nothing can top Selim Wormrider for on-the-nose self parody.

I dont know fucked around with this message at 03:06 on Sep 29, 2020

# ? Sep 29, 2020 01:50

euphronius: Feb 18, 2009

The last book of the sequels is so so bad in the same way

Every character from the original books comes back and is important

It�s so dumb

# ? Sep 29, 2020 01:56

Stryder: Oct 3, 2002

Mode 7 posted:

I mean yeah you could do something interesting with the Butlerian Jihad or you could just have this

Ok. After a lot of beating around the bush by others in this thread, I finally have proof why I should never EVER pick up the Failson books. Thank you.

# ? Sep 29, 2020 02:24

Bubblyblubber: Nov 17, 2014

euphronius posted:

The last book of the sequels is so so bad in the same way

Every character from the original books comes back and is important

It’s so dumb

Everyone is very important except for alia, whose ghola gets instantly ganked by the Baron's ghola.

# ? Sep 29, 2020 02:26

Wingnut Ninja: Jan 11, 2003; Mostly Harmless

Has anybody ever checked the celestial mechanics for Arrakis, because it doesn't seem to make sense. Arrakeen and most of the known civilization on the planet is said to be clustered far up in the northern regions, with Arrakeen being at a fairly high latitude. But at one point in Dune Messiah the sun is described as being almost "directly overhead" during mid day, which wouldn't happen without some extreme axial tilt. And if that were the case there would be significant parts of the year where the sun alternately doesn't set or doesn't rise, which you think would have been mentioned at some point.

e: obviously this is the most pedantic of nits to pick, I just find it interesting that he put so much thought into the ecology side but whiffed it on the "what does the sun actually do at high latitudes" aspect.

Wingnut Ninja fucked around with this message at 05:35 on Sep 29, 2020

# ? Sep 29, 2020 04:24

threelemmings: Dec 4, 2007; A jellyfish!

I dont know posted:

Amazing. That is exactly what I expected it would be, and still somehow surprisingly trite.

Edit: Those names are thing of sublime stupidity. Actually naming your protaganist Serena Butler, in the Butlerian Jihad books is amazing. However, nothing can top Selim Wormrider for on-the-nose self parody.

I am Brian Bookwriter, and little did I know one day it would be my destiny to finish a beloved story with my own series sure to wow and amaze the fans, written with the subtlety and craft learned from my father, Frank... uh... Prequel.

# ? Sep 29, 2020 04:40

exmachina: Mar 12, 2006; Look Closer

By dune Messiah the desert has receded some. Yeah all of dune basically takes place in the artic circle don't think too hard about it. I'm sure there is an overcomplicated explaination for it somewhere

# ? Sep 29, 2020 04:55

FBS: Apr 27, 2015; The real fun of living wisely is that you get to be smug about it.

*taps the [No @Duneauthor Zone] sign*

# ? Sep 29, 2020 05:23

Prolonged Panorama: Dec 21, 2007; Holy hookrat Sally smoking crack in the alley!

There's also an issue of scale - if the map in the novel is to scale, and distances given in the text are accurate, Arrakis is about the size of the Moon - only 1/4 the diameter of Earth. Yet it has an almost Earth-like surface gravity of .9g, which means it must be super dense - implausibly so for a terrestrial planet.

The closer you look the more contradictions you'll find, because Frank simply didn't cross reference everything or do the math. I choose to believe Arrakis has little to no axial tilt and that the map has some landmarks drawn too far apart, giving a roughly Earth sized world of plausible density. There are still oddities like the sun being described as overhead far from the equator, but oh well.

They didn't have Wikipedia in the 60s and it was more than an evening's work to check if you were in the ballpark.

The Dune Encyclopedia gives hard numbers (below) but also contains a bunch of contradictory science-babble. It's part of the charm, really.

Canopus inner system, according to the Dune Encyclopedia:

Prolonged Panorama fucked around with this message at 05:55 on Sep 29, 2020

# ? Sep 29, 2020 05:53

Tree Bucket: Apr 1, 2016; R.I.P.idura leucophrys

That's the thing I love about Dune. It is compelling enough that your brain just tries to make it work, even though it's sheer madness from top to bottom. For instance: has anyone does the maths on the amount of energy required to shift an object half a kilometre long long and 40 metres wide through sand at 50kmh? I bet it's rather a lot.

# ? Sep 29, 2020 08:55

Eau de MacGowan: May 12, 2009; BRASIL HEXA
2026 tá logo aí

yeah thats why sand worms are so loving hot bro

# ? Sep 29, 2020 09:08

steinrokkan: Apr 2, 2011; Soiled Meat

Those worms are flying off the shelves dude

# ? Sep 29, 2020 09:24

Tree Bucket: Apr 1, 2016; R.I.P.idura leucophrys

Yeah! Now we have to add "the amount of energy needed to heat eighty thousand tonnes of Worm to hundreds of degrees C" to the mix.
I mean I guess there's an awful lot of solar radiation coming in, and maybe the sand-plankton are capturing that to fuel their metabolisms (and that of the Worms) which raises the interesting---
-and once again I've been trapped into trying to explain a crazy old man's fevered imaginings. How does this keep happening. Dune is not real and Duncan isn't coming to save us.

# ? Sep 29, 2020 09:24

Galewolf: Jan 9, 2007; The human gallbladder is indeed a puzzle!

Mode 7 posted:

I mean yeah you could do something interesting with the Butlerian Jihad or you could just have this

[quote]
The Butlerian Jihad introduces a generation of characters whose families will later become the most significant in the universe: the Atreides, the Corrinos and the Harkonnens. Serena Butler, daughter of the viceroy of the League of Nobles, is a strong voice for the human rebellion. Her paramour Xavier Harkonnen leads the military force on the current League capital world of Salusa Secundus. As the story begins, Xavier is repelling an attack on the planet by Omnius' army of cymeks. The cymeks are former humans whose brains have been implanted in preservation canisters, which in turn can be installed into a variety of fearsome mechanical bodies, to extend their lives indefinitely and make them nearly unstoppable. The original twenty cymeks (calling themselves the Titans) had conquered the complacent universe by exploiting humanity's reliance and dependency on machines, yet the Titans were later overthrown themselves by Omnius, an artificial intelligence of their design. Seeking to replace human chaos with machine order, Omnius thus ignited the war between machine and humanity. Vorian Atreides is the son and subordinate of the leading cymek Titan Agamemnon (whose last name, Atreides, originates with House Atreus, from the ancient Greek epic the Iliad).

Meanwhile, the Sorceresses of Rossak, a matriarchal order, are perfecting their destructive psychic powers for use against the machines, and maintaining a breeding program to create more powerful telepaths. Pharmaceutical magnate Aurelius Venport is about to discover an interesting new substance, the spice melange, and the famous inventor Tio Holtzman accepts the diminutive genius Norma Cenva into his employ.

Serena is captured by the Titan Barbarossa and put under the watch of Erasmus, an independent robot who seeks to understand humans completely so that the thinking machines may be truly superior. His methods of study often entail human vivisection and torture in his slave pens. Erasmus takes a liking to Serena, as does the young Vorian Atreides. Serena realizes she is pregnant with Xavier's child, and later gives birth to a baby boy whom she names Manion (after her father). Erasmus finds this distraction inconvenient, and not only removes Serena's uterus but kills her young son in front of her.

This single event incites the entire Jihad, and young Manion is soon labelled the first martyr, Manion the Innocent. Vorian, learning about the murder and realizing the lie he lives as a machine trustee, betrays his machine masters and flees with Serena. They are joined by another trustee, Iblis Ginjo, a slave leader who masterminds the rebellion on Synchronized Earth.

The first human victory of the so-called Butlerian Jihad is the destruction of Earth and the Earth Omnius using atomics. Iblis (now Grand Patriarch of the Holy Jihad) and Serena (Priestess of the Jihad) are the religious leaders of the human rebellion, and Xavier and Vorian its two generals. The brutal Titans are desperate to break free of their machine masters and wage their own techno-misanthropic war, and Omnius and Erasmus are determined to conquer and destroy all of humanity once and for all.

And on a lonely desert planet known as Arrakis, the seeds of legend are sown with Selim Wormrider, an outcast from his tribe, who sees the future of Shai-Hulud and makes it his mission to save his god from those who would wish to take the spice.

Of all the duneauthor and Anderson garbage listed above (and in general) the bolded part, for some reason, RILES THE gently caress ME UP for how it simply shits on everything Frank established with BG and the universe in general. I mean, what is this Forgotten Realms 2nd Edition garbage? Like, why? WHY?

BG is one of the :stare:

aspects of the whole series and I always loved how they shaped the universe subtly and things came up about them in the most surprising places throughout the whole series and their -supposed- origin story is THIS? Holy poo poo, that's some extremely spiteful contempt to the source material.

# ? Sep 29, 2020 09:48

Eau de MacGowan: May 12, 2009; BRASIL HEXA
2026 tá logo aí

is techno-misanthropic a worse word than paramour?

is manion butler a worse name than vorian atreides?

# ? Sep 29, 2020 09:55

Galewolf: Jan 9, 2007; The human gallbladder is indeed a puzzle!

I am extremely lollin about Iblis Ginjo. For people who don't know, Iblis means Devil / Satan / Shaitan in Arabic

# ? Sep 29, 2020 10:02

Eau de MacGowan: May 12, 2009; BRASIL HEXA
2026 tá logo aí

so youre saying not to trust iblis ginjo???

# ? Sep 29, 2020 10:28

Galewolf: Jan 9, 2007; The human gallbladder is indeed a puzzle!

Eau de MacGowan posted:

so youre saying not to trust iblis ginjo???

No, I think you should let SATAN be in control of everything.

Galewolf fucked around with this message at 11:18 on Sep 29, 2020

# ? Sep 29, 2020 11:15

The Bloop: Jul 5, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

Past more leftover Star Wars names for Dune

Lone Sando

Sneek E. Kabbal

Benjamin Holywar

# ? Sep 29, 2020 12:21

ilovebeersooomuch: May 23, 2014

The Bloop posted:

Past more leftover Star Wars names for Dune

Lone Sando

Sneek E. Kabbal

Benjamin Holywar

Sunny McSandyface
Howard Notmoist
Mane Karak�Ter
Sexy Cocksworth

Edit sorry no more failson references

ilovebeersooomuch fucked around with this message at 12:52 on Sep 29, 2020

# ? Sep 29, 2020 12:38

AFewBricksShy: Jun 19, 2003; of a full load.

Beef Swellington
Hari Chrysknife

AFewBricksShy fucked around with this message at 13:25 on Sep 29, 2020

# ? Sep 29, 2020 12:58

davidspackage: May 16, 2007; Nap Ghost

Quiz Haderacco

# ? Sep 29, 2020 13:01

Tree Bucket: Apr 1, 2016; R.I.P.idura leucophrys

Sable Darkshade
Dag'Ger Bladesman
Komikra Leaf
The Crew: Sade G. Hadd

# ? Sep 29, 2020 13:10

Shageletic: Jul 25, 2007

Cymeks

Cymeks

CyMEKS

CYMRKS

CYMEEKS

CYLIUMEK

# ? Sep 29, 2020 13:37

The Bloop: Jul 5, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

Deserto Troutslapper

Mannly Kannly

Chairdog Chippendale

# ? Sep 29, 2020 13:45

Colonel Cancer: Sep 26, 2015; Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon

Worm Spicer

# ? Sep 29, 2020 13:48

feedmegin: Jul 30, 2008

Eau de MacGowan posted:

so youre saying not to trust iblis ginjo???

Also, ginjo means (particularly fancy) sake.

Mr Devil Booze. That sure sounds like a legit name alright.

# ? Sep 29, 2020 14:00

Colonel Cancer: Sep 26, 2015; Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon

Iblis Gaijin :awesomelon:

# ? Sep 29, 2020 14:03

The Bloop: Jul 5, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

Axle Otto

Tom Jabbar

# ? Sep 29, 2020 14:12

Anne Frank Funk: Nov 4, 2008

Pussaia Vageena

# ? Sep 29, 2020 14:16

ilovebeersooomuch: May 23, 2014

"Ayy, yo, is dat Tommy Jabbar ovah there? AY! YO! TOMMY! TOOOOMMY! This fuckin guy."
*waves*

# ? Sep 29, 2020 14:22

Colonel Cancer: Sep 26, 2015; Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon

Chrys Jabbar :haw:

# ? Sep 29, 2020 14:23

threelemmings: Dec 4, 2007; A jellyfish!

ilovebeersooomuch posted:

"Ayy, yo, is dat Tommy Jabbar ovah there? AY! YO! TOMMY! TOOOOMMY! This fuckin guy."
*waves*

Ah, the Tom Jabbar. It punctures only... footballs.

# ? Sep 29, 2020 14:53

Mode 7: Jul 28, 2007

exmachina posted:

I dunno, might make a passable star wars novel

Having read KJAs Star Wars novels, I can assure you it does not.

# ? Sep 29, 2020 15:03

ilovebeersooomuch: May 23, 2014

threelemmings posted:

Ah, the Tom Jabbar. It punctures only... footballs.

Are you suggesting the duke's son is a hooligan?

edit Oh gently caress I just got the joke

Paul: Are you suggesting the duke's son is a quarterback?

Shaddam: The deliberate and systematic deflation of ALL footballs on Arrakis

ilovebeersooomuch fucked around with this message at 15:10 on Sep 29, 2020

# ? Sep 29, 2020 15:03

Mode 7: Jul 28, 2007

Also sorry for posting duneauthor in the no duneauthor zone but people need to understand just how loving bad it is.

Is there anyone here who has read the original novels and who is still unaware of the plot for Hunters of Dune/Sandworms of Dune? If so can you please make up what you thought Dune 7 would be like/about in your head, then go read the summaries of those and report back.

Maybe they wouldn't have had to write two loving novels if they hadn't spent an entire novels worth of trash garbage writing desperately bending everything to line up with the godawful prequel poo poo they'd just finished writing.

# ? Sep 29, 2020 15:06

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# ? May 29, 2024 23:31

William Bear: Oct 26, 2012; "That's what they all say!"

Prolonged Priapism posted:

There's also an issue of scale - if the map in the novel is to scale, and distances given in the text are accurate, Arrakis is about the size of the Moon - only 1/4 the diameter of Earth. Yet it has an almost Earth-like surface gravity of .9g, which means it must be super dense - implausibly so for a terrestrial planet.

The closer you look the more contradictions you'll find, because Frank simply didn't cross reference everything or do the math. I choose to believe Arrakis has little to no axial tilt and that the map has some landmarks drawn too far apart, giving a roughly Earth sized world of plausible density. There are still oddities like the sun being described as overhead far from the equator, but oh well.

They didn't have Wikipedia in the 60s and it was more than an evening's work to check if you were in the ballpark.

The Dune Encyclopedia gives hard numbers (below) but also contains a bunch of contradictory science-babble. It's part of the charm, really.

Canopus inner system, according to the Dune Encyclopedia:

I didn't know that Arrakis was supposed to be about the same size as Earth. Based on the book's map, people have figured it to be about a fourth of Earth's size, or about the same size as Earth's moon.

https://thewertzone.blogspot.com/2019/03/sf-questions-how-large-is-arrakis.html

The problem with that is that Arrakis is elsewhere stated to have 0.9g surface gravity, so it must be really dense. Nerds at the above link figure Arrakis must be mostly heavy metals like osmium and gold.

# ? Sep 29, 2020 15:16

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