the empire runs on duncan

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > the empire runs on duncan

Jabor: Jul 16, 2010; #1 Loser at SpaceChem

someone should tell sci fi authors to go jerk off before writing instead of churning out some excruciating scenes while horned up

# ? Nov 25, 2020 13:55

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# ? May 26, 2024 23:31

Kenny Logins: Jan 11, 2011; EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AND OPEN PALM SLAM A WHITE WHALE INTO THE PEQUOD. IT'S HELL'S HEART AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I STRIKE AT THEE ALONGSIDE WITH THE MAIN CHARACTER, ISHMAEL.

bump_fn posted:

eyyyy i'm yakuza'ing here

*tony soprano voice* what happened to miyamoto musashi?!

# ? Nov 25, 2020 14:02

Sweevo: Nov 8, 2007; i sometimes throw cables away

i mean straight into the bin without spending 10+ years in the box of might-come-in-handy-someday first

im a fucking monster

Fart Sandwiches posted:

the worst part of any fantasy / sci fi (I guess really any genre but it�s worst in these) is having to read about the authors hosed up sex things. like it�s so ridiculous for rothfuss to not only have Amazonian sex ninjas but they also didn�t know that babies came from sex and STIs didn�t exist in their society because they were clean or something

still better than the ones who fill their books with rape because it's the only way they know how to make a woman vulnerable, a villain bad, or a hero motivated

# ? Nov 25, 2020 14:19

Schadenboner: Aug 15, 2011; by Shine

Re-listening to A Memory Called Empire (Martine, 2019) a couple thoughts:

This is a really fun palace intrigue scifi and I can't wait to read the next one. Really, it's easily a 9/10. If you liked Cetaganda (Bujold, 1995), which you should, you will like this.
Poetry battles are way way less entertaining to read about than to actually read (but I can understand that Ms. Martine might have difficulty coming up with multiple 15-line sonnets about municipal infrastructure repair).
Poetry battles are probably never going to be entertaining prose much like when fantasy authors write songs, poems written by prose authors (even good prose authors) are rarely themselves good.*
Maybe it's just me but generational consciousness-transfer technology is -level terrifying to me and I can't understand how it's so blithely popular in the genre.
Related to the above, as social media (Trump et. al., c. 2012-2020) has shown us no actually-existing culture of humans would put the rules in place that Ms. Martine has to put in place to make the generational transfer technology less- which seems a bit cheap.

*: Most of the songs in Dune (Herbert, 1965) and The Dune Encyclopedia (McNelly et. al., 1984)**, however, are p.-to-v.deece. I'm mostly talking about the unremitting poo poo that is any attempt at it by J.R.R. Tolkien.
**: McNelly was mostly a scholar of, among other things, English poetry so that's probably why he had more skill at songwriting but Tolkien purported to be a scholar as well so it's apparently no assurance?

Schadenboner fucked around with this message at 16:09 on Nov 25, 2020

# ? Nov 25, 2020 15:56

indigi: Jul 20, 2004; ^{how can we not talk about family

when family's all that we got?}

I can�t stop thinking about a Verhoeven Ready Player One

# ? Nov 25, 2020 16:16

Schadenboner: Aug 15, 2011; by Shine

One of my greatest regrets was not picking up a used copy of The Dune Encyclopedia I saw for cheap in in p.deece condition.

:sigh:

# ? Nov 25, 2020 16:19

Silver Alicorn: Mar 30, 2008; 𝓪 𝓻𝓮𝓭 𝓹𝓪𝓷𝓭𝓪 𝓲𝓼 𝓪 𝓬𝓾𝓻𝓲𝓸𝓾𝓼 𝓼𝓸𝓻𝓽 𝓸𝓯 𝓬𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓮

thanks for the suggestions pals

now I just have to pick one

# ? Nov 25, 2020 16:19

Roosevelt: Jul 18, 2009; I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.

indigi posted:

I can�t stop thinking about a Verhoeven Ready Player One

lol. robocop executes the main character then shoots ernest cline in the dick. sharon stone uncrosses her legs.

# ? Nov 25, 2020 17:24

Kenny Logins: Jan 11, 2011; EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AND OPEN PALM SLAM A WHITE WHALE INTO THE PEQUOD. IT'S HELL'S HEART AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I STRIKE AT THEE ALONGSIDE WITH THE MAIN CHARACTER, ISHMAEL.

Roosevelt posted:

lol. robocop executes the main character then shoots ernest cline in the dick. sharon stone uncrosses her legs.

# ? Nov 25, 2020 17:25

indigi: Jul 20, 2004; ^{how can we not talk about family

when family's all that we got?}

Roosevelt posted:

lol. robocop executes the main character then shoots ernest cline in the dick. sharon stone uncrosses her legs.

two hundred squibs per square inch

# ? Nov 25, 2020 17:32

Cybernetic Vermin: Apr 18, 2005

indigi posted:

I can�t stop thinking about a Verhoeven Ready Player One

yeah, this is an absolutely delightful thought. heinleins starship troopers is similar to ready player one in how it how it idealizes a real dumbshit idea about human achievement in a thin sci-fi wrapper, and the same kind of treatment would go a long way.

# ? Nov 25, 2020 17:32

Achmed Jones: Oct 16, 2004

i just bought a wizard of earthsea and futurology

gonna do some reading over thanksgiving

# ? Nov 25, 2020 17:44

SmokaDustbowl: Feb 12, 2001; by vyelkin; Fun Shoe

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FcAGDXYkOzM

# ? Nov 25, 2020 17:55

mediaphage: Mar 22, 2007; Excuse me, pardon me, sheer perfection coming through

Achmed Jones posted:

i just bought a wizard of earthsea and futurology

gonna do some reading over thanksgiving

earthsea such a classic. one of the first real series i read in elementary school

# ? Nov 25, 2020 19:00

Agile Vector: May 21, 2007; scrum bored

indigi posted:

I can�t stop thinking about a Verhoeven Ready Player One

Roosevelt posted:

lol. robocop executes the main character then shoots ernest cline in the dick. sharon stone uncrosses her legs.

# ? Nov 25, 2020 19:28

The Fool: Oct 16, 2003

mediaphage posted:

earthsea such a classic. one of the first real series i read in elementary school

I re-read the first two books a couple years ago, they hold up surprisingly well

# ? Nov 25, 2020 19:30

bump_fn: Apr 12, 2004; _{two of them}

SmokaDustbowl posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FcAGDXYkOzM

cool!

# ? Nov 25, 2020 19:50

rjmccall: Sep 7, 2007; no worries friend; Fun Shoe

jesus this new season of the crown

# ? Nov 25, 2020 20:09

Achmed Jones: Oct 16, 2004

oh are the earthsea books YA titles? i mean ill still read it but that's disappointing

then again i read sword of the samurai cat in first grade and was hilariously inappropriately into everything about it. i dressed up as tomokato the samurai cat for halloween one year lmao

# ? Nov 25, 2020 20:39

distortion park: Apr 25, 2011

Schadenboner posted:

Re-listening to A Memory Called Empire (Martine, 2019) a couple thoughts:

This is a really fun palace intrigue scifi and I can't wait to read the next one. Really, it's easily a 9/10. If you liked Cetaganda (Bujold, 1995), which you should, you will like this.

Poetry battles are way way less entertaining to read about than to actually read (but I can understand that Ms. Martine might have difficulty coming up with multiple 15-line sonnets about municipal infrastructure repair).

Poetry battles are probably never going to be entertaining prose much like when fantasy authors write songs, poems written by prose authors (even good prose authors) are rarely themselves good.*

Maybe it's just me but generational consciousness-transfer technology is -level terrifying to me and I can't understand how it's so blithely popular in the genre.

Related to the above, as social media (Trump et. al., c. 2012-2020) has shown us no actually-existing culture of humans would put the rules in place that Ms. Martine has to put in place to make the generational transfer technology less- which seems a bit cheap.

*: Most of the songs in Dune (Herbert, 1965) and The Dune Encyclopedia (McNelly et. al., 1984)**, however, are p.-to-v.deece. I'm mostly talking about the unremitting poo poo that is any attempt at it by J.R.R. Tolkien.
**: McNelly was mostly a scholar of, among other things, English poetry so that's probably why he had more skill at songwriting but Tolkien purported to be a scholar as well so it's apparently no assurance?

I thought it was ok. It felt really weird that there were like 10 people and 2 city blocks in the whole universe though

# ? Nov 25, 2020 20:41

Silver Alicorn: Mar 30, 2008; 𝓪 𝓻𝓮𝓭 𝓹𝓪𝓷𝓭𝓪 𝓲𝓼 𝓪 𝓬𝓾𝓻𝓲𝓸𝓾𝓼 𝓼𝓸𝓻𝓽 𝓸𝓯 𝓬𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓮

Achmed Jones posted:

oh are the earthsea books YA titles? i mean ill still read it but that's disappointing

i think it�s only YA on a technicality

it doesn�t have any gross sex in it that I remember though (I�ve only read the first book so far)

# ? Nov 25, 2020 20:47

Achmed Jones: Oct 16, 2004

ah cool then

god sci fi and weird sex poo poo. loving heinlein. loving to sail beyond the sunset. gently caress. gross.

# ? Nov 25, 2020 21:17

indigi: Jul 20, 2004; ^{how can we not talk about family

when family's all that we got?}

sex scenes in pretty much any novel but especially every sci fi novel should be limited to �and then they had sex and it ruled/sucked�

# ? Nov 25, 2020 21:21

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

the only two books I can remember giving up on halfway through are both heinlein (number of the beast and stranger in a strange land)

# ? Nov 25, 2020 21:22

SmokaDustbowl: Feb 12, 2001; by vyelkin; Fun Shoe

haveblue posted:

the only two books I can remember giving up on halfway through are both heinlein (number of the beast and stranger in a strange land)

I tried to read a piers anthony book and ended up throwing it across the room

# ? Nov 25, 2020 21:25

Agile Vector: May 21, 2007; scrum bored

for whatever your options of doctorow are, he wrote a sex scene in eastern standard tribe that stood out to me as one of the best at the time:

quote:

15.

Vigorous sex ensued.

16.

indigi posted:

sex scenes in pretty much any novel but especially every sci fi novel should be limited to �and then they had sex and it ruled/sucked�

edit: right after i posted i saw this and yeah, its almost the ideal sci-fi sex scene

# ? Nov 25, 2020 21:26

Agile Vector: May 21, 2007; scrum bored

SmokaDustbowl posted:

I tried to read a piers anthony book and ended up throwing it across the room

i finished exactly one of their books and feel it should preemptively count toward some form of credit against a future wrong

# ? Nov 25, 2020 21:29

Achmed Jones: Oct 16, 2004

and, like, if you can't not write the sex scene, at least

you know

don't use the word "impaled"

gently caress you william gibson, gently caress you larry niven

# ? Nov 25, 2020 21:31

mediaphage: Mar 22, 2007; Excuse me, pardon me, sheer perfection coming through

SmokaDustbowl posted:

I tried to read a piers anthony book and ended up throwing it across the room

i read a bunch of them as a kid

i picked one up when i was older and found a plot about a 50 year dude wanting to have sex with a 16 year old and stopped and threw them all out

Achmed Jones posted:

and, like, if you can't not write the sex scene, at least

you know

don't use the word "impaled"

gently caress you william gibson, gently caress you larry niven

also not allowed: �turgid member�

# ? Nov 25, 2020 21:31

Achmed Jones: Oct 16, 2004

D: i dont think ive ever read that one. i am happy for that fact

# ? Nov 25, 2020 21:33

The Fool: Oct 16, 2003

isn�t piers anthony the guy that had some kid run away from home to be with him

# ? Nov 25, 2020 21:42

indigi: Jul 20, 2004; ^{how can we not talk about family

when family's all that we got?}

Achmed Jones posted:

and, like, if you can't not write the sex scene, at least

you know

don't use the word "impaled"

gently caress you william gibson, gently caress you larry niven

if you can�t not write the sex scene at least make it ridiculous. he porked her down with his mighty tomato torpedo

e: or like this

quote:

He thought of Nina and her mellifluous buttocks that he used to love to bang. Even now his nano enhanced hearing could almost hear her vagina lips quivering with moisture and also pleasure, like a slice of synth-ham being tongued by one of Malaprop�s slamhounds. When he got back to City5, he was going to do some sex, no doubt about that. �That�s right doll� he said to nobody and the wind. They were going to do it hard. He smiled, blowing smoke from his nostrils. They were going to do it cyber hard.

indigi fucked around with this message at 21:51 on Nov 25, 2020

# ? Nov 25, 2020 21:48

The Fool: Oct 16, 2003

The Fool posted:

isn�t piers anthony the guy that had some kid run away from home to be with him

yes

https://io9.gizmodo.com/in-1987-a-young-fantasy-fan-ran-away-from-home-to-live-5931929

# ? Nov 25, 2020 21:53

The Fool: Oct 16, 2003

indigi posted:

e: or like this

ready player two excerpts getting saucy

# ? Nov 25, 2020 21:54

indigi: Jul 20, 2004; ^{how can we not talk about family

when family's all that we got?}

I can�t even imagine figuring out where an author lives currently, and that�s with Google and social media and poo poo. props to that kid for actually winding up at Anthony�s house

# ? Nov 25, 2020 21:56

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

The Fool posted:

yes

https://io9.gizmodo.com/in-1987-a-young-fantasy-fan-ran-away-from-home-to-live-5931929

read the full transcript of this and it was actually a really cool story

# ? Nov 25, 2020 22:02

Archduke Frantz Fanon: Sep 7, 2004

pointsofdata posted:

I thought it was ok. It felt really weird that there were like 10 people and 2 city blocks in the whole universe though

she�s under house arrest for most of the book. its not like she would have much chance to take in the sights

she does go to that diner that explodes

i agree in general it felt a bit empty and could use some fleshing out. enjoyable enough read

# ? Nov 25, 2020 22:06

The Fool: Oct 16, 2003

indigi posted:

I can�t even imagine figuring out where an author lives currently, and that�s with Google and social media and poo poo. props to that kid for actually winding up at Anthony�s house

I guess Anthony would write little slice-of-life style diary entries in the backs of his books and the kid used clues from those to figure it out.

# ? Nov 25, 2020 22:07

indigi: Jul 20, 2004; ^{how can we not talk about family

when family's all that we got?}

yeah but like (picking a name at random) John Scalzi tweets twenty times a day and I doubt I�d be able to find my way to his doorstep without hiring a PI or something

# ? Nov 25, 2020 22:09

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# ? May 26, 2024 23:31

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

The Fool posted:

I guess Anthony would write little slice-of-life style diary entries in the backs of his books and the kid used clues from those to figure it out.

the printed maps in the books are maps of florida with all the place names changed to fantasy ones. the kid correctly guessed piers lived at the real location corresponding to the fantasy capital and then found him in a phone book (it was 1987)

# ? Nov 25, 2020 22:09

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > the empire runs on duncan

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