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hyperhazard
Dec 4, 2011

I am the one lascivious
With magic potion niveous

Ambitious Spider posted:

It's weird because where I grew up in the Philly burbs, my Catholic education and the Catholics I knew were all left of the dial politically speaking. Then I realized if they weren't that, American Catholics are all weirdo trad caths who should really just pull a mike pence and convert to being evangelicals.

For some reason all of the practicing Catholics I know are also from eastern PA (a good mix of Main Line and Pennsyltucky) and they're all pretty leftist. The older generation is really against abortion, though, and will vote based on that alone.

there wolf posted:

Conservatives adopted anti-abortion policies to break the liberal stronghold in American Catholicism. It's been a supply line for lovely Evangelical politics ever since, and the church leaders in the US have no interest in stopping it.

There was a fascinating article that I read a while back that of loving course I can't find now. I'm probably forgetting a lot of the nuance, but it basically said that once the Civil Rights Movement really got going and it was no longer cool to be openly racist and segregationist, conservatives needed something else to rally their troops. So they came up with the issue of abortion.

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china bot
Sep 7, 2014

you listen HERE pal
SAY GOODBYE TO TELEPHONE SEX
Plaster Town Cop
I love that you can be a leftist and still self-identify as part of an organization that protected/enabled pedophiles
https://twitter.com/dril/status/831805955402776576?lang=en

T-man
Aug 22, 2010


Talk shit, get bzzzt.

china bot posted:

I love that you can be a leftist and still self-identify as part of an organization that protected/enabled pedophiles
https://twitter.com/dril/status/831805955402776576?lang=en

as a leftist drone operator, I

Josef bugman
Nov 17, 2011

Pictured: Poster prepares to celebrate Holy Communion (probablY)

This avatar made possible by a gift from the Religionthread Posters Relief Fund

china bot posted:

I love that you can be a leftist and still self-identify as part of an organization that protected/enabled pedophiles

I think, as we are all finding out, that is just every organisation.

Jezza of OZPOS
Mar 21, 2018

GET LOSE❌🗺️, YOUS CAN'T COMPARE😤 WITH ME 💪POWERS🇦🇺
What's the difference between a baby and a bag of cocaine? Eric Clapton wouldn't drop a bag of cocaine out a window. Thanks, I'll be here all week

Megera
Sep 9, 2008
A high school friend's boomer mom is astounding in her use of Facebook





yes she liked her own status too

edit: I just checked to see who shared her post

Megera has a new favorite as of 22:38 on Nov 27, 2020

T-man
Aug 22, 2010


Talk shit, get bzzzt.

https://deadstate.org/evangelical-activist-joe-bidens-military-will-be-a-transgender-atheist-army-for-the-antichrist/

Queen-Of-Hearts
Mar 17, 2009

"I want to break your heart💔 and give you mine🫀"




How do you even contain that kind of posting energy? Does her phone routinely melt?

seiferguy
Jun 9, 2005

FLAWED
INTUITION



Toilet Rascal
https://mobile.twitter.com/asheville/status/1332400066800349192

Hell of a typo. Let 'er rip.

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Well I guess we won't be having a Harley Jolley Christmas this year :(

Inceltown
Aug 6, 2019

Fatty Crabcakes posted:

Well I guess we won't be having a Harley Jolley Christmas this year :(

:drat:

Tip Shades
Oct 28, 2016

Fatty Crabcakes posted:

Well I guess we won't be having a Harley Jolley Christmas this year :(

:sickos:

Powered Descent
Jul 13, 2008

We haven't had that spirit here since 1969.

Fatty Crabcakes posted:

Well I guess we won't be having a Harley Jolley Christmas this year :(

I wonder if Mr. Jolley spent the entire last half of his life cursing the day Burl Ives was born.

Zaphod42
Sep 13, 2012

If there's anything more important than my ego around, I want it caught and shot now.

I would give anything to live in the imaginary world that exists in conservatives nightmares

Kevin DuBrow
Apr 21, 2012

The uruk-hai defender has logged on.
Baby steps. Let's start with attacking and dethroning God and see where we go from there.

dialhforhero
Apr 3, 2008
Am I 🧑‍🏫 out of touch🤔? No🧐, it's the children👶 who are wrong🤷🏼‍♂️

Once again another example of making democrats/liberals/leftists/Biden waaaaaaay cooler than reality.

Push El Burrito
May 9, 2006

Soiled Meat
gently caress YOU BART HARLEY JOLLEY!

captainOrbital
Jan 23, 2003

Wrathchild!
💢🧒

snergle
Aug 3, 2013

A kind little mouse!

china bot posted:

I love that you can be a leftist and still self-identify as part of an organization that protected/enabled pedophiles
https://twitter.com/dril/status/831805955402776576?lang=en

past tense w/ catholic church? lol ok

Garrand
Dec 28, 2012

Rhino, you did this to me!

china bot posted:

I love that you can be a leftist and still self-identify as part of an organization that protected/enabled pedophiles
https://twitter.com/dril/status/831805955402776576?lang=en

I don't really think of Something Awful as an organization

Air Skwirl
May 13, 2007

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

Garrand posted:

I don't really think of Something Awful as an organization

Something Awful is way the gently caress quicker and better about kicking out pedophiles than the Catholic church.

Karia
Mar 27, 2013

Self-portrait, Snake on a Plane
Oil painting, c. 1482-1484
Leonardo DaVinci (1452-1591)

Skwirl posted:

Something Awful is way the gently caress quicker and better about kicking out pedophiles than the Catholic church.

Alternatively, SA just really, really sucks at coverups. There's something to be said for an organization incompetent enough that they can't possibly slip anything under the radar.

Elviscat
Jan 1, 2008

Well don't you know I'm caught in a trap?


The US Navy policy that lets anyone who completes a sea tour (~4yrs) transition for free including pay during all the required recovery time, official gender change in Federal records etc. was never removed from official policy, just effectively nullified by the idiot-in-Chief's tweets, so I'd expect at least a little bit of this will come true. :D

T-man
Aug 22, 2010


Talk shit, get bzzzt.

Elviscat posted:

The US Navy policy that lets anyone who completes a sea tour (~4yrs) transition for free including pay during all the required recovery time, official gender change in Federal records etc. was never removed from official policy, just effectively nullified by the idiot-in-Chief's tweets, so I'd expect at least a little bit of this will come true. :D

gently caress trans warcriminals.

i vomit kittens
Apr 25, 2019


e: I had to keep editing this because he put his full name and phone number in like 3 different places

quote:

I'M LOOKING FOR FUN PEOPLE TO JOIN ME FOR A THANKSGIVING POP UP DINNER FOR MY WIFE AND BABY. THE EVENT STARTS AT 5PM AT CURTIS HIXON PARK. IF YOU CAN BE THERE AT 4PM TO HELP PREP THAT'S EVEN BETTER.

.
I'M LOOKING FOR FUN PEOPLE TO JOIN ME FOR A THANKSGIVING POP UP DINNER FOR MY WIFE AND BABY.
THE EVENT STARTS AT 5PM AT CURTIS HIXON PARK. IF YOU CAN BE THERE AT 4PM TO HELP PREP THAT'S EVEN BETTER.


EDIT: ILL INCENTIVIZE EVERYONE TO FILL THE ROLES ON MY LIST FURTHER DOWN. THE BEST SUPER FAN GETS $25. FOR THE OTHER ROLES LIKE CHEF, SECURITY GUARD, BEAUTY BODY MAN, ETC THE BEST OF ALL ROLES GETS $80. SECOND PLACE GETS $60 AND THIRD GETS $40. TO BE FAIR, ONKY THOSE WHO ARE THERE FROM START TO END CAN WIN THOSE PRIZES. LETS CALL IT 5-7 PM BUT COULD FINISH EARLY DEPENDING ON WHAT PLAYS OUT. EVERYONE WHO HELPS OUT ANY REASONABLE AMOUNT GETS $10 FOR THE HELP. I KNOW THE TOTALS ARE LOW BUT THIS SHOULDNT FEEL LIKE WORK. IF IT DOES THEN YOU SHOULD PROBABLY SKIP IT

It's been a really tough Thanksgiving morning for my little family here in Tampa. My wife and I moved here six years ago and we love it. The only negative aspect of our Tampa life is that all of our extended family lives up north.

This is just our second Thanksgiving since entering parenthood. After years of struggles, our little Hailey Bean was born in September of 2019. We've been looking forward to today for a long time. We decided months ago that we would spend the holiday in PA with my parents. It was just yesterday that we finally cancelled our trip. Because of the last minute change, there basically is no Thanksgiving for our little crew. I didn't prepare in any way so we don't even have any turkey cold cuts in the fridge.

I just decided that I'm not going to let my family look back at today as Thanksgiving with no turkey. I have a plan to turn Turkey Day upside down later today. I'm throwing together some fun that starts at 5:00 pm at Curtis Hixon Park. To do it right, I need help from the people of Tampa.
TEXT ME ASAP IF YOU CAN HELP ME RUN THIS POP-UP DATE NIGHT

I told my wife to be ready to leave at 4:30pm. She doesn't know what we will be doing. I'm going to take food with us to have our Thanksgiving in the park. The twist is that the evening will mimick a celebrity entrance to an award show..

-I have an old Bentley that I will chauffeur to the park

-I have a red carpet to roll out from the rear door of the car where she'll exit the vehicle

-I have velvet rope to keep the fans away

-I have a large white backdrop where the wife and Bean Lady will pose for the paparazzo

-I have a collapsible table to set up in the park where we will actually eat

So that's the basic idea. I'm producing our Thanksgiving day experience. The goal is to make my wife and daughter feel like they are the stars of this Thanksgiving.

If anyone wants to have some fun, I'd love for you to join. Any way you'd like to be involved is fine with me. The roles I'd love to add to the mix are isted below..

-Actual producer type person to help me coordinate everything and direct those who want to help out

-One or more people to video the entire event so we can edit it to tell the story afterward. I'd love to have a proper videographer record the night. I'm willing to pay something reasonable for that service

-Super fans who just want to see my wife and daughter as they walk the red carpet. They could yell out how much they love them, hold up poster board signs, etc.

-Security looking person

-Hair and makeup artist that follows my wife around constantly working to make her look perfect (The person isn't really doing hair and makeup. They're just playing the role of that type of person)

-Professional waiter looking person

-Someone with a chef's coat and hat that can come to the table and check on things

-Anyone nice enough to provide us some leftovers for our meal. That would mean I have one less task to get done in the next couple hours.

I'll try and reply to messages here quickly but I have tons to prep ASAP. Anyone seriously interested who thinks they could help a lot should text me instead of messaging. Number below. Thanks!

FYI- THIS WILL TAKE PLACE TONIGHT REGARDLESS OF WHO JOINS FOR THE RIDE. TONIGHT WILL BE WHAT MY FAMILY REMEMBERS ABOUT THIS THANKSGIVING HOLIDAY. IT'S GOING TO BE GREAT BUT IF TAMPA HELPS OUT, IT WILL BE AWESOME! THANKS!

i vomit kittens has a new favorite as of 09:57 on Nov 28, 2020

Elysiume
Aug 13, 2009

Alone, she fights.

T-man posted:

gently caress trans warcriminals.
The war criminal thing is kind of a dealbreaker; do I have to?

Elviscat
Jan 1, 2008

Well don't you know I'm caught in a trap?

T-man posted:

gently caress trans warcriminals.

I'm also super quick to condemn trans people who join the military because it's often the only way for them to survive under the super lovely American System we all labor under. So that's super cool of you to just dismiss them entirely.

Dang It Bhabhi!
May 27, 2004



ASK ME ABOUT
BEING
ESCULA GRIND'S
#1 SIMP

Leftists making GBS threads on veterans is almost comically tragic and stupid.

stringless
Dec 28, 2005

keyboard ⌨️​ :clint: cowboy

Elviscat posted:

I'm also super quick to condemn trans people who join the military because it's often the only way for them to survive under the super lovely American System we all labor under. So that's super cool of you to just dismiss them entirely.
more :golfclap: trans :golfclap: drone :golfclap: pilots

goblin week
Jan 26, 2019

Absolute clown.

Elviscat posted:

I'm also super quick to condemn trans people who join the military because it's often the only way for them to survive under the super lovely American System we all labor under. So that's super cool of you to just dismiss them entirely.

oh that's ok then

The Saddest Rhino
Apr 29, 2009

Put it all together.
Solve the world.
One conversation at a time.



I 👁 was shooting 🔫 heroin 🚬 and reading 📖 “The Fountainhead” in the front 💦😜🔻 seat 💺👁🗑 of my privately 🔒 owned 😎 police 👮😠😡 cruiser 🚢 when 🍑 a call ☎📞 came 💦 in. I 👁 put 😏 a quarter 🕒 in the radio 📻 to activate 🙅😲😵 it. It was the chief 👦🍆👀.

“Bad news 📰, detective 🅱🅾™. We got 🍸 a situation.”

“What? Is the mayor 🤡😳💦 trying 😈 to ban 😤🚫🙅‍♂️ trans 🌈 fats 🐋 again?”

“Worse. Somebody 👤 just stole 😤 four 4️⃣ hundred 💯 and forty-seven million 💯 dollars’ worth 💰 of bitcoins.”

The heroin 💉 needle 🍆💉 practically ❤ fell 🍂 out of my arm 💪. “What kind 🙁 of monster 👹 would do something 😅 like 💦👍 that? Bitcoins are the ultimate 🙌💯🙇 currency 💰: virtual 🔥, anonymous 😮🚫👹, stateless. They represent 🇺🇸 true 💯 economic 💵 freedom 🙌, not subject 📐 to arbitrary manipulation 💯😎✊ by any government 😓🙄. Do we have any leads?”

“Not yet 😇. But 🍑 mark 😡 my words 📓: we’re going 🏃 to figure 💪 out who did this and we’re going 👉 to take 👊 them down 👇⬇ … provided 🤔💭 someone 👤 pays 💰 us 👨 a fair 👒👉 market 📰 rate 💰 to do so.”

“Easy, chief,” I 👁 said 💬👱. “Any rate 💰 the market 📈 offers 💸 is, by definition 📚, fair.”

He 👨 laughed 😂. “That’s why 🚮❓ you’re the best 🏆 I 👥 got 🉐, Lisowski. Now you 🤔👉 get 🉐 out there and find 👀 those bitcoins.”

“Don’t worry,” I 👁 said 💬. “I’m on 🔛 it.”

I 👥 put 😏 a quarter 💰 in the siren 🚨. Ten 🔟 minutes ⏰ later 🕑, I 👁🙌🏻 was on 🔛 the scene 🕑. It was a normal 😐 office 🏢 building 👷🚧, strangled 🌬 on 🔛 all 💯 sides 👈👉 by public 🙈⛱😳 sidewalks 🏘. I 👁 hopped 🐸 over 🔁 them and went 💨 inside 💠.

“Home Depot™ Presents 🎁 the Police!®” I 👁 said 💬, flashing 💂🎆⚡ my badge 💪🏼💁🏼 and my gun 🔫 and a small 👌 picture 🖼 of Ron 💁‍♂️ Paul 👽. “Nobody move 📦 unless 🆒💁 you 👈 want 😋 to!” They didn’t.

“Now, which one 👺☝❗ of you 👈 punks 🎸 is going 🏃🏇 to pay 👾💸 me to investigate 👀 this crime?” No 😣 one 👺☝ spoke 🗣 up ☝.

“Come on,” I 👁 said 👱🏿💬🙈. “Don’t you 👈 all 💯 understand 🤔 that the protection 🛡 of private 🕵⁉🚫 property 🎮🚣🏻⛽ is the foundation 🤓🔍🤯 of all 😤 personal 👨 liberty?”

It didn’t seem 👀 like 😄 they did.

“Seriously, guys 💪👦. Without ❌😖 a strong 💪🏋️‍♀️ economic 📈 motivator 🤷🏼‍♀️, I’m just going 🏃 to stand 🕴🏻 here and not solve 👍🅱 this case 💼. Cash 💵 is fine 😰💦, but 🍑 I 👥 prefer 🍞 being paid 💧 in gold 💰 bullion or autographed Penn 🖊 Jillette posters.”

Nothing ❌. These people 👫 were stonewalling me. It almost 💸 seemed 🚹🚤 like 👍 they didn’t care 💅 that a fortune 💰 in computer 🖥 money 🤑 invented 🧪🔧 to buy 💸 drugs 💊 was missing 🧦.

I 👁 figured 🧠 I 👁 could wait 🚏 them out. I 👁 lit 🔥 several 💯 cigarettes 🚬 indoors 🚪👈. A pregnant 👶😇 lady 👩 coughed 😷🤧, and I 👁 told 🗣 her 👸♀ that secondhand 👊 smoke 💨😜 is a myth 🐲. Just then, a man 👦 in glasses 🥃💪🏼🏇🏼 made 👑 a break 💥 for it.

“Subway™ Eat 👅 Fresh ⛲ and Freeze ❄, Scumbag!®” I 👁 yelled 🗣.

Too late 🕛. He 👥 was already 👋 out the front 🔝 door 🔑. I 👁 went 🏃 after 2️⃣ him 👨🏾.

“Stop right ✔ there!” I 👁 yelled 🗣 as I 👁 ran 🔒🏣♍. He 👨 was faster 🏃💨 than me because I 👁 always 🔥 try 😈 to avoid 👋 stepping 🚶 on 🔛 public 🙈⛱😳 sidewalks 🛄. Our country 🇺🇸 needs 🙏🏼 a private-sidewalk voucher system 🗺, but 🍑, thanks 🙏 to the incestuous 🤢 interplay between 👉👈 our corrupt 😈👀 federal 🇺🇸 government 💩 and the public-sidewalk lobby 🤪, it will never 🚫 happen 😱.

I 👁 was losing 🥉 him 👴. “Listen, I’ll pay 💰 you 👈 to stop!” I 👁 yelled 🗣. “What would you 👈 consider 👈 an appropriate 🙅🏼 price 💰💸 point 📍 for stopping ✋? I’ll offer 📴 you 👉 a thirteenth of an ounce 🐐 of gold 🏆🥇🏅 and a gently 👅 worn 😥 ‘Bob Barr ‘08’ extra-large long-sleeved men’s T-shirt!”

He 👨 turned 😍. In his 💦 hand 🤲 was a revolver 🤠🔫 that the Constitution 📜 said 🗣🙍‍♂️ he 👥 had every ☝ right ✔ to own. He 👥 fired 🔥 at me and missed 😢. I 👁 pulled ✊🏻 my own gun 🔫, put 😏 a quarter 💰 in it, and fired 💥🔫🔥 back 🔙. The bullet 🤷🏽‍♀️ lodged 🏠 in a U.S.P.S 💌📧📫. mailbox 📫 less ➖ than a foot 🦶🏼 from his 👦🏿🥶💦 head 💆. I 👁 shot 🔫 the mailbox 📫 again ❌😬, on 🔛 purpose 😄.

“All right 👌, all 💯👺 right!” the man 👨 yelled 😡🗣, throwing 🤽‍♀️ down ⬇ his 👦💦 weapon 🔫🗡. “I give 🎁 up ☝, cop 👮! I 👁 confess 🚇🚪🌘: I 👁 took 👫 the bitcoins.”

“Why’d you 👉🏻🧑🏻 do it?” I 👁 asked 🙏, as I 👁 slapped 👋🏼 a pair 💏 of Oikos™ Greek 🇬🇷➿ Yogurt 🥛🥄 Presents ✌🙌 Handcuffs® on 🔛 the guy 👦🏼👦🏽.

“Because I 👁 was afraid.”

“Afraid?”

“Afraid of an economic 💵 future 📅 free 🆓 from the pernicious 👼🏻 meddling of central 🏪 bankers,” he 👨 said 💬. “I’m a central 💖 banker.”

I 👁 wanted 😍 to coldcock the guy 👨🚹. Years 🗓 ago 🔙, a central 💖 banker 💦 killed ☠ my partner 👭👬👫. Instead 🚔, I 👁 shook 🤝 my head 💆.

“Let this be a message 💬 to all 💯 your 👈 central-banker friends 👫👬👭 out on 🔛 the street,” I 👁 said 💬. “No matter 😱 how many 👬 bitcoins you 👉 steal 💰, you’ll never 👎🙅❌ take 💅 away 😐 the dream 😴 of an open 👐 society 👥 based ✊👌 on 🔛 the principles 👑 of personal 👨 and economic 💵 freedom.”

He 🏻👥 nodded 🌝 because he 👥 knew 👓 I 👁 was right ✔. Then he 👥 swiped his 💦 credit 💳 card 💳 to pay 💰🤛 me for arresting ❗ him 👴.

stringless
Dec 28, 2005

keyboard ⌨️​ :clint: cowboy

i'm hitting ctrl+z and nothing's happening

Elysiume
Aug 13, 2009

Alone, she fights.

FFT posted:

i'm hitting ctrl+z and nothing's happening
every time you hit ctrl+z I hit ctrl+y

learnincurve
May 15, 2014

Smoosh
His bio is a fox Mulder quote

https://twitter.com/Rent_not_buy/status/1331848385632956416

redgubbinz
May 1, 2007


Making the internet accessible to religious nutcases is the best and worst thing about the modern era. Mental health care would have been nice, but nice things aren't possible.

StillFullyTerrible
Feb 16, 2020

you should have left Let's Play open for public view, Lowtax

T-man posted:

gently caress trans warcriminals.

so you then

cuz ur posts r a warcrime

xtal
Jan 9, 2011

by Fluffdaddy

T-man posted:

gently caress trans warcriminals.

Gay people shouldn't be in the military, but as a personal choice and not a legislative one

learnincurve
May 15, 2014

Smoosh

xtal posted:

Gay people shouldn't be in the military, but as a personal choice and not a legislative one

I assure you the Navy is how the lesbians find each other.

learnincurve
May 15, 2014

Smoosh
Stupid people a long long thread of:

https://mobile.twitter.com/sublimemarch/status/1331606021178011654

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hyperhazard
Dec 4, 2011

I am the one lascivious
With magic potion niveous

i vomit kittens posted:

e: I had to keep editing this because he put his full name and phone number in like 3 different places

Either this guy want to pull a Scott Peterson or he wants his wife to voluntarily leave him. Yikes.

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