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Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised.

Slim Jim Pickens posted:

Isn't the soleus just the walking around muscle

I think anyone in GiP can tell you that's a very good sign of a career soldier.

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Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

You get lots of developed solei in cattle-keeping cultures


From all the calf raising

Alhazred
Feb 16, 2011




Tunicate posted:

my fav is that narwhal they unearthed a few years back that got full formal burial rites

"Hey, I got an idea we for a prank we can pull on the future generations that will dig up our graves:haw:"

Schadenboner
Aug 15, 2011

by Shine

Brawnfire posted:

You get lots of developed solei in cattle-keeping cultures


From all the calf raising

Moooo

:mad:

Telsa Cola
Aug 19, 2011

No... this is all wrong... this whole operation has just gone completely sidewaysface

Alhazred posted:

"Hey, I got an idea we for a prank we can pull on the future generations that will dig up our graves:haw:"

I prefer to believe that narwhal did something loving amazing that they all witnessed and it's a tragedy of the highest order we will never know what.

Terrible Opinions
Oct 18, 2013



Tunicate posted:

my fav is that narwhal they unearthed a few years back that got full formal burial rites
You got a link for those who want to know more?

JonathonSpectre
Jul 23, 2003

I replaced the Shermatar and text with this because I don't wanna see racial slurs every time you post what the fuck

Soiled Meat
Hey ancient China friends, I am trying to create a role-playing scenario for my class involving ancient China and one of these figures:

Qin Shi Huang
Confucius
Lao Tzu

In the game they are trying to keep history from changing and they have an antagonist who is trying to change history. I'm looking for an incident from one of their lives, preferably when they were younger and not famous, when their lives or "destinies" could have changed. For example, a previous scenario was them deciding whether or not to give 20th century medical advice to the doctors of Ogedei Khan in 1241. I like to run the scenario, reveal who the character was, and then go into teaching about them/their influence on China.

Anyone got anything interesting related to those guys? Or another incident from ancient China that could have massively changed their history/society? Thanks for any help!

Grand Fromage
Jan 30, 2006

L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?


With Qin we don't know anything for sure about his early life, which makes it hard. There was a failed assassination attempt on him when he was just a minor ruler though.

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Telsa Cola posted:

I prefer to believe that narwhal did something loving amazing that they all witnessed and it's a tragedy of the highest order we will never know what.

I like to think it led a lost expedition through a perilous path to home

sullat
Jan 9, 2012

JonathonSpectre posted:

Hey ancient China friends, I am trying to create a role-playing scenario for my class involving ancient China and one of these figures:

Qin Shi Huang
Confucius
Lao Tzu

In the game they are trying to keep history from changing and they have an antagonist who is trying to change history. I'm looking for an incident from one of their lives, preferably when they were younger and not famous, when their lives or "destinies" could have changed. For example, a previous scenario was them deciding whether or not to give 20th century medical advice to the doctors of Ogedei Khan in 1241. I like to run the scenario, reveal who the character was, and then go into teaching about them/their influence on China.

Anyone got anything interesting related to those guys? Or another incident from ancient China that could have massively changed their history/society? Thanks for any help!

IIRC Confucius had loads of political enemies, at one point one of them even had him under siege at one point. With Qin Shi Huang, there's the infamous assassination attempts as well as a coup attempt by his own mother and her boyfriend. Another guy to look into using would be Liu Bang, founder of the Han dynasty, who had plenty of adventures and narrow escapes on his journey from peasant to emperor.

skasion
Feb 13, 2012

Why don't you perform zazen, facing a wall?
Confucius tried to restore his nominal overlord, the Duke of Lu, to power over the objections of the most powerful landed families. He didn’t get very far with it and had to go into exile, in the course of which he publicized his opinions all through the warring states. So you might be able to do something interesting with a Confucius who found political success, but not so much a wide hearing.

Laozi isn’t exactly a historical figure, more like a philosophical character with a god bolted on after the fact, so it’s kind of hard to do this sort of thing with him.

sullat posted:

Another guy to look into using would be Liu Bang, founder of the Han dynasty, who had plenty of adventures and narrow escapes on his journey from peasant to emperor.

This would be a good one. You could also do a lot of stuff around the Three Kingdoms/collapse of the Han. Cao Cao’s failed attempt to assassinate Dong Zhuo would be great but is (iirc) ahistorical, but you could do something like “what if Cao Cao won Red Cliff” or what have you.

Kanine
Aug 5, 2014

by Nyc_Tattoo
What ancient culture would have had the best barbecues?

Also I'm curious if anyone can think of any specific ancient foods/dishes that are still really good and worth trying to make nowadays.

Stringent
Dec 22, 2004


image text goes here

Kanine posted:

What ancient culture would have had the best barbecues?

Polynesia? I think they were the origin or at least a major practitioner of pit roasted pork?

Fuschia tude
Dec 26, 2004

THUNDERDOME LOSER 2019

Stringent posted:

Polynesia? I think they were the origin or at least a major practitioner of pit roasted pork?

The Taíno in the Caribbean too, who in fact were the origin of the term "barbecue" via the Spanish "barbacoa".

Lead out in cuffs
Sep 18, 2012

"That's right. We've evolved."

"I can see that. Cool mutations."




Kanine posted:

What ancient culture would have had the best barbecues?

Also I'm curious if anyone can think of any specific ancient foods/dishes that are still really good and worth trying to make nowadays.

I've been working from an ancient Roman/Greek cookbook, and one dish that was super simple but also tasty was coriander-crusted whitefish. Basically you coarsely grind up a couple of tablespoons of coriander seed, mix it with a bit of salt, and coat the fish with it. Then you bake the fish, ideally covered, until it's cooked. To serve, you mix wine vinegar 1:1 with fish sauce and sprinkle it over the fish. (The coriander can be a bit dry otherwise.)

This is a fun blog to check out if you're interested in ancient Roman cookery: http://pass-the-garum.blogspot.com/search/label/Recipes

This one is fun if you want to go even further back, to the earliest known recipe book:

https://twitter.com/Moudhy/status/1261227596672630785

Telsa Cola
Aug 19, 2011

No... this is all wrong... this whole operation has just gone completely sidewaysface
India likely has some pretty dope ancient food dishes.

Pibil is loving delicious though you'd have to substitute out the pork and citrus and stuff. I recommend you substitute the pork out for paca as it's really loving close/better than pork.

Telsa Cola fucked around with this message at 14:55 on Dec 10, 2020

Ola
Jul 19, 2004

Kanine posted:

What ancient culture would have had the best barbecues?

Also I'm curious if anyone can think of any specific ancient foods/dishes that are still really good and worth trying to make nowadays.

Obviously the Celtic roasted boar. It would be nice with some music to go with the feast, but apparently that was often suppressed.

Power Khan
Aug 20, 2011

by Fritz the Horse
*Carnyx solo*

sebzilla
Mar 17, 2009

Kid's blasting everything in sight with that new-fangled musket.


Who wants to read about new, decent-quality mosaics being laid in Britain well into the 5th Century, courtesy of my old stomping ground?

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2020/dec/10/stunning-dark-ages-mosaic-found-at-roman-villa-in-cotswolds

Schadenboner
Aug 15, 2011

by Shine

sebzilla posted:

Who wants to read about new, decent-quality mosaics being laid in Britain well into the 5th Century, courtesy of my old stomping ground?

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2020/dec/10/stunning-dark-ages-mosaic-found-at-roman-villa-in-cotswolds

Yeah, but 10+ years into the American Decline people were still building copies of Versailles on land that everyone knew would be underwater in 50 years.

Rich people are loving weird.

:shrug:

Telsa Cola
Aug 19, 2011

No... this is all wrong... this whole operation has just gone completely sidewaysface
The sea people demand their tribute.

Ithle01
May 28, 2013
This is why I support Caligula. He's the only emperor who ever had the guts to take on Neptune for stealing our land!

Elderbean
Jun 10, 2013


Aren't most lentil dishes pretty ancient in origin? Like, simmering lentils and some vegetables with spices?

Edgar Allen Ho
Apr 3, 2017

by sebmojo
I would love to see the ancients try our modern dishes with ingredients from around the globe. Both the haute cuisine and the trashiest.

Deteriorata
Feb 6, 2005

Edgar Allen Ho posted:

I would love to see the ancients try our modern dishes with ingredients from around the globe. Both the haute cuisine and the trashiest.

Cheeseburgers would be a big hit almost everywhere.

Kangxi
Nov 12, 2016

"Too paranoid for you?"
"Not me, paranoia's the garlic in life's kitchen, right, you can never have too much."
Anything with tomatoes, corn, eggplant, avocado, or potatoes in it would be a total novelty to everybody in Europe, Africa, or Asia before the "Columbian exchange" of plants and animals in the 15th century.

Give an ancient Greek or Roman person some Mexican food just to see their reaction. Or introduce a native American to anything with citrus or apples.

Koramei
Nov 11, 2011

I have three regrets
The first is to be born in Joseon.

Elderbean posted:

Aren't most lentil dishes pretty ancient in origin? Like, simmering lentils and some vegetables with spices?

Would they be the same? And the same with the spices and so on. 2000+ years of selective breeding probably makes them pretty different even in places they're native to, right?

mossyfisk
Nov 8, 2010

FF0000

Edgar Allen Ho posted:

I would love to see the ancients try our modern dishes with ingredients from around the globe. Both the haute cuisine and the trashiest.

There are still plenty of people living in fairly isolated agrarian communities with very limited diets.

And almost as many youtube channels where they review fast food.

Edgar Allen Ho
Apr 3, 2017

by sebmojo

mossyfisk posted:

There are still plenty of people living in fairly isolated agrarian communities with very limited diets.

And almost as many youtube channels where they review fast food.

Sure would be nice if capitalism could make my dream happen and also feed a lot of people (for the likes and subscribes) but I'm not getting my hopes up.

Also, if I'm a roman circa 220BCE what's the closest thing I've had to a chili pepper? Coating my food in black pepper?

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

I believe they would've used long pepper more than the peppercorns we use today. They also had horseradish for spice, although that's a but different of a heat.

FreudianSlippers
Apr 12, 2010

Shooting and Fucking
are the same thing!

Imagine giving one of those gimmicky hot sauces that's 5 million on the Scoville scale to a medieval peasant.

They'd probably die instantly.

Edgar Allen Ho
Apr 3, 2017

by sebmojo
The opposite is also amazing to think about. What's Cato the Younger's take on tomato being a staple of roman cuisine in 2020? Is Diocletian pleased that barbarous germans and their offspring love cabbages more than anyone else ever will?

sebzilla
Mar 17, 2009

Kid's blasting everything in sight with that new-fangled musket.


FreudianSlippers posted:

Imagine giving one of those gimmicky hot sauces that's 5 million on the Scoville scale to a medieval peasant.

They'd probably die instantly.

Those dinguses died of things like "surprise at ventriloquism" and "dancing too much" so yeah probably

Schadenboner
Aug 15, 2011

by Shine

sebzilla posted:

Those dinguses died of things like "surprise at ventriloquism" and "dancing too much" so yeah probably

Here lies 'ol Baldrick. Thought of tabasco and died.

mossyfisk
Nov 8, 2010

FF0000

Edgar Allen Ho posted:

Sure would be nice if capitalism could make my dream happen and also feed a lot of people (for the likes and subscribes) but I'm not getting my hopes up.


I wasn't positing a hypothetical, I was suggesting you go watch some of those videos. It's not exactly time travel obviously, but it's the closest you'll get.

Brain Candy
May 18, 2006

Edgar Allen Ho posted:

Is Diocletian pleased that barbarous germans and their offspring love cabbages more than anyone else ever will?

No, he would feel incredible shame at his descendants and people, that they dismiss such a wonder.

(seriously cabbages are really good)

Elderbean
Jun 10, 2013


Stuffed cabbage is delicious.

Koramei posted:

Would they be the same? And the same with the spices and so on. 2000+ years of selective breeding probably makes them pretty different even in places they're native to, right?

Absolutely, but it's still a dish that's been around for a long time in some form. Lentil soup was eaten in Sumer, Egypt, and Greece for sure.

Elderbean fucked around with this message at 18:36 on Dec 10, 2020

Grand Fromage
Jan 30, 2006

L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?


Edgar Allen Ho posted:

Also, if I'm a roman circa 220BCE what's the closest thing I've had to a chili pepper? Coating my food in black pepper?

Black/long pepper, yeah.

NikkolasKing
Apr 3, 2010





Is that line about the Roman Emperors adopting instead of just having their children succeed them true?

I guess I just always assumed it was dynastic, sons got the seat of power and stuff. Granted, I have no real knowledge of Roman Emperors beyond random trivia from assorted places. So my bad for assuming.

When did this habit stop and why?

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Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Well it's true in the sense that the five good emperor's before Marcus all adopted the next emperor, the four previous ones also had no children, and then once Marcus had one he left the empire to him. Unfortunately that son was commodus.

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