symbolic posted:

Rating: Kool Kong

Quote posted:

Donkey Kong Country 3: Dixie's Double Trouble.

I played this game on a display SNES at Sears while my family was waiting to get out family portrait taken. Even at 12 years old something about the way it looked troubled me. It looked like plastic where the preceding two games looked like clay. It stank of the worst type of appalachian Americana. Who invited the Country Bear Jamboree?

Who would ever swap the jungle for this setting? The first world especially doesn't feel like DKC at all. I feel like I'm playing a cheap Salute Your Shorts tie in by Acclaim or Interplay. Donkey Lips Kong.

I remember my mother coming to check on me periodically at the demo kiosk. The year before I'd gotten lost in a blizzard and she went through a very protective phase. She was wearing a black dress and shiny earrings. This was 18 years before American politics snapped her brain and she created an unhealable rift between us.

"Is this something you'd want for Christmas?" she asked.

I shook my head and felt the stiff collar of my white shirt rub against my neck. I already had an N64. I had played Mario 64. This game, brand new, was already a relic.

The game stuffers without David Wise doing the music. The music that is there is servicible, but I can't help but wonder about the jug band bops and hambone beats that Wise would have written with the new setting. But even that would have been a poor balm to spread over uninspired levels. Never once did I get a wow moment. Never once was I pleasantly surprised by a new mechanic or the placement of a bonus barrel.

Why does Kiddy Kong exist? He brings no new mechanics to the game. He serves the same role as DK did in the first game. He's the heavy. We have a heavy. His name is Donkey Kong. The main character of the series is unplayable more often than not in the SNES trilogy that bears his name.

There is one thing that I will give the game credit for--i found all the secrets myself. The removal of bustable walls that are all but unmarked is to thank for this. It was a black mark on the original and I'm glad it's gone.

I can't recommend this game. I played it because it occupied a small space in my head for 20 years. Space that can now be cleared, ready to be occupied by some other skulking thing that took root when I was young and the world was magic.

103% 6 hours 12 minutes. Rating: Kool Kong

Quote posted:

Donkey Kong Country 3: Dixie's Double Trouble.

I played this game on a display SNES at Sears while my family was waiting to get out family portrait taken. Even at 12 years old something about the way it looked troubled me. It looked like plastic where the preceding two games looked like clay. It stank of the worst type of appalachian Americana. Who invited the Country Bear Jamboree?

Who would ever swap the jungle for this setting? The first world especially doesn't feel like DKC at all. I feel like I'm playing a cheap Salute Your Shorts tie in by Acclaim or Interplay. Donkey Lips Kong.

I remember my mother coming to check on me periodically at the demo kiosk. The year before I'd gotten lost in a blizzard and she went through a very protective phase. She was wearing a black dress and shiny earrings. This was 18 years before American politics snapped her brain and she created an unhealable rift between us.

"Is this something you'd want for Christmas?" she asked.

I shook my head and felt the stiff collar of my white shirt rub against my neck. I already had an N64. I had played Mario 64. This game, brand new, was already a relic.

The game stuffers without David Wise doing the music. The music that is there is servicible, but I can't help but wonder about the jug band bops and hambone beats that Wise would have written with the new setting. But even that would have been a poor balm to spread over uninspired levels. Never once did I get a wow moment. Never once was I pleasantly surprised by a new mechanic or the placement of a bonus barrel.

Why does Kiddy Kong exist? He brings no new mechanics to the game. He serves the same role as DK did in the first game. He's the heavy. We have a heavy. His name is Donkey Kong. The main character of the series is unplayable more often than not in the SNES trilogy that bears his name.

There is one thing that I will give the game credit for--i found all the secrets myself. The removal of bustable walls that are all but unmarked is to thank for this. It was a black mark on the original and I'm glad it's gone.

I can't recommend this game. I played it because it occupied a small space in my head for 20 years. Space that can now be cleared, ready to be occupied by some other skulking thing that took root when I was young and the world was magic.

103% 6 hours 12 minutes. Rating: Kool Kong

trying to jack off posted:

can everyone please beat games like this now

Pablo Nergigante posted:

ArfJason posted:

Hunter s thompson: i was nobody at the time and met up with a sailor from the yucatan pulling a second shift as supplier for the zetas. The drugs got him years later, and it made no headlines, but what made the papers were his wares, and for good reason. He was hip enough to use the obviously fake name "Uncle N.", and supplied nitrites so powerful they could propel the challenger and have enough for the trip back home. I took a whiff of some poppers and followed him down a hallway. Whatever room wasnt plastered with leather daddies and fetish gear was covered in glass bottle shards from the brawls taking place earlier, but soon he took me to a special pristine room, for a unique new type of gas.

In this clinical room, he turns on the lone computer.
i beat gender bender gas dna twister.
It was then that i knew, football season truly was over.

In Training posted:

The details of my life are quite inconsequential. I played this game on a display SNES at Sears while my family was waiting to get out family portrait taken. Even at 12 years old something about the way it looked troubled me. It looked like plastic where the preceding two games looked like clay. It stank of the worst type of appalachian Americana. Who invited the Country Bear Jamboree?
                                                                                                                                                                              /

In Training posted:

The details of my life are quite inconsequential. I played this game on a display SNES at Sears while my family was waiting to get out family portrait taken. Even at 12 years old something about the way it looked troubled me. It looked like plastic where the preceding two games looked like clay. It stank of the worst type of appalachian Americana. Who invited the Country Bear Jamboree?
                                                                                                                                                                              /

In Training posted:

The details of my life are quite inconsequential. I played this game on a display SNES at Sears while my family was waiting to get out family portrait taken. Even at 12 years old something about the way it looked troubled me. It looked like plastic where the preceding two games looked like clay. It stank of the worst type of appalachian Americana. Who invited the Country Bear Jamboree?
                                                                                                                                                                              /

In Training posted:

The details of my life are quite inconsequential. I played this game on a display SNES at Sears while my family was waiting to get out family portrait taken. Even at 12 years old something about the way it looked troubled me. It looked like plastic where the preceding two games looked like clay. It stank of the worst type of appalachian Americana. Who invited the Country Bear Jamboree?
                                                                                                                                                                              /

In Training posted:

The details of my life are quite inconsequential. I played this game on a display SNES at Sears while my family was waiting to get out family portrait taken. Even at 12 years old something about the way it looked troubled me. It looked like plastic where the preceding two games looked like clay. It stank of the worst type of appalachian Americana. Who invited the Country Bear Jamboree?
                                                                                                                                                                              /

In Training posted:

The details of my life are quite inconsequential. I played this game on a display SNES at Sears while my family was waiting to get out family portrait taken. Even at 12 years old something about the way it looked troubled me. It looked like plastic where the preceding two games looked like clay. It stank of the worst type of appalachian Americana. Who invited the Country Bear Jamboree?
                                                                                                                                                                              /

trying to jack off posted:

also kiddy kong exists because rare are a bunch of perverted freaks that find the babys stinky diaper irresistible op

In Training posted:

The details of my life are quite inconsequential. I played this game on a display SNES at Sears while my family was waiting to get out family portrait taken. Even at 12 years old something about the way it looked troubled me. It looked like plastic where the preceding two games looked like clay. It stank of the worst type of appalachian Americana. Who invited the Country Bear Jamboree?
                                                                                                                                                                              /

In Training posted:

The details of my life are quite inconsequential. I played this game on a display SNES at Sears while my family was waiting to get out family portrait taken. Even at 12 years old something about the way it looked troubled me. It looked like plastic where the preceding two games looked like clay. It stank of the worst type of appalachian Americana. Who invited the Country Bear Jamboree?
                                                                                                                                                                              /

Pablo Nergigante posted:

In Training posted:

The details of my life are quite inconsequential. I played this game on a display SNES at Sears while my family was waiting to get out family portrait taken. Even at 12 years old something about the way it looked troubled me. It looked like plastic where the preceding two games looked like clay. It stank of the worst type of appalachian Americana. Who invited the Country Bear Jamboree?
                                                                                                                                                                              /

Bicyclops posted:

I remember when I had my own web site in 2004 and I wrote epic screeds about my life for each video game review of hits like illusion of gaia, earthbound and Intellivision's beauty and the beast.

when do we get to see your sprite comic, op?

Bicyclops posted:

I remember when I had my own web site in 2004 and I wrote epic screeds about my life for each video game review of hits like illusion of gaia, earthbound and Intellivision's beauty and the beast.

when do we get to see your sprite comic, op?

In Training posted:

The details of my life are quite inconsequential. I played this game on a display SNES at Sears while my family was waiting to get out family portrait taken. Even at 12 years old something about the way it looked troubled me. It looked like plastic where the preceding two games looked like clay. It stank of the worst type of appalachian Americana. Who invited the Country Bear Jamboree?
                                                                                                                                                                              /

In Training posted:

I made a video game blog in grade school where I wrote multiple entries about how Sonic Adventure DX was the greatest game of all time.

In Training posted:

I made a video game blog in grade school where I wrote multiple entries about how Sonic Adventure DX was the greatest game of all time.

mycophobia posted:

its the best of the trilogy. wake up sheeple

mysterious loyall X posted:

none of them are very good

trying to jack off posted:

2 is ok, but i cant see myself going back

trying to jack off posted:

2 is ok, but i cant see myself going back