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HopperUK
Apr 29, 2007

Why would an ambulance be leaving the hospital?
I can't imagine anyone being given poo poo for being an atheist here unless they were being really obnoxious about it somehow.

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Air Skwirl
May 13, 2007

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

HopperUK posted:

I can't imagine anyone being given poo poo for being an atheist here unless they were being really obnoxious about it somehow.

In America atheists are a bit like vegans, most of them never ever mention it unless it's pertinent to the conversation at hand, however there's a large enough minority that is way too vocal about it that everyone else assumes all of them are obnoxious assholes.

Bogmonster
Oct 17, 2007

The Bogey is a philosopher who knows

HopperUK posted:

I can't imagine anyone being given poo poo for being an atheist here unless they were being really obnoxious about it somehow.

To be fair, the person telling the made up story does come off as pretty obnoxious! Getting real Anglophile, love doctor who, teaboo vibes from it anyhow.

Air Skwirl
May 13, 2007

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

Bogmonster posted:

To be fair, the person telling the made up story does come off as pretty obnoxious! Getting real Anglophile, love doctor who, teaboo vibes from it anyhow.

I've never seen "teaboo" before and I love it.

Fleta Mcgurn
Oct 5, 2003

Porpoise noise continues.

LITERALLY A BIRD posted:

God can only care about one thing at a time :(

*GASPS* look who still exists!

Grunch Worldflower
Nov 16, 2020

bike tory posted:

r/atheism isn't cheating, but it's definitely low hanging fruit

Also the most easily falsifiable part is when he says the child had a respect for authority. No toddler respects authority.

Every toddler deeply respects authority, but they each view themselves as that authority.

eddoghetto
Mar 27, 2007
612 Wharf Avenue

Breitbart Is Rightbart posted:

"he seemed to have explored child sitting services and none were available"

What kind of robots write this stuff?

Content:



I'm trying to figure out if the beard guy finds the situation to be humorous at all. If only he put some sort of indication at the beginning of each text so i could know for sure

LITERALLY A BIRD
Sep 27, 2008

I knew you were trouble
when you flew in

Fleta Mcgurn posted:

*GASPS* look who still exists!

Hi! :buddy:

Walton Simons
May 16, 2010

ELECTRONIC OLD MEN RUNNING THE WORLD

bike tory posted:

r/atheism isn't cheating, but it's definitely low hanging fruit

Also the most easily falsifiable part is when he says the child had a respect for authority. No toddler respects authority.

I thought the one weird trick to make a child stay in bed was the most egregious but there are several contenders.

DoomLazer
Jun 1, 2011
I'm pretty sure the part where their family hasn't talked to them in years was true.

Antivehicular
Dec 30, 2011


I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

The two parts of that story I believe:

1) That the OP would view a relative coming to them for emergency child care following a sudden hospitalization as a Typical Breeder(tm) trying to fob off a kid, not a loved one in crisis

2) That the OP is everyone's absolute last choice for emergency child care, possibly behind "let's leave the kid under a bridge for a few hours"

Telemaze
Apr 22, 2008

What you expected hasn't happened.
Fun Shoe

Walton Simons posted:

Is r/atheism cheating?



Am I misreading this, or does the smug OP refer to herself as both cousin and aunt (calling the kid a nephew)? Is that a thing people do, or can this bullshitter just not keep the story straight for five minutes?

Also, I love how she thinks there's going to be a shootout next door, so she sits at the window.

CROWS EVERYWHERE
Dec 17, 2012

CAW CAW CAW

Dinosaur Gum

Telemaze posted:

Am I misreading this, or does the smug OP refer to herself as both cousin and aunt (calling the kid a nephew)? Is that a thing people do, or can this bullshitter just not keep the story straight for five minutes?

Also, I love how she thinks there's going to be a shootout next door, so she sits at the window.

The aunt bit isn't that weird. People definitely call their cousins' kids their nieces and nephews even if it's not the exact term for it, especially if they're close.

Telemaze
Apr 22, 2008

What you expected hasn't happened.
Fun Shoe
Oh, interesting. I've never heard of that before.

Even still, I'd feel pretty weird about pulling the "But I'm his aunt!!!" thing on a cousin whose kid I've never met before though.

Tea Bone
Feb 18, 2011

I'm going for gasps.

CROWS EVERYWHERE posted:

The aunt bit isn't that weird. People definitely call their cousins' kids their nieces and nephews even if it's not the exact term for it, especially if they're close.



Telemaze posted:

Oh, interesting. I've never heard of that before.

Even still, I'd feel pretty weird about pulling the "But I'm his aunt!!!" thing on a cousin whose kid I've never met before though.

This is exactly it. I call my cousins daughter my niece but my cousin was more like a sister to me growing up. But right in the first line of their story, they clarify that they're not close at all to their cousin.

Not that it matters. Mis-labeling a "First cousin once removed" is hardly the smoking gun here.

BattyKiara
Mar 17, 2009
I was raised calling all older relatives Aunt X or Uncle Y. Including people like my grandmother's half-sister, my grandfather's cousin, my mum's best friend and her husband, and so on. It was a title of respect, and a way of saying we see you as a member of our near family, no matter what bloodlines say.

Yngwie Mangosteen
Aug 23, 2007

BattyKiara posted:

I was raised calling all older relatives Aunt X or Uncle Y. Including people like my grandmother's half-sister, my grandfather's cousin, my mum's best friend and her husband, and so on. It was a title of respect, and a way of saying we see you as a member of our near family, no matter what bloodlines say.

Same, as far out as like, my Grandmother's second cousin and her extended family (so no or almost no blood relation) were just 'Aunt/Uncle/Counsin/Nephew/Niece' or whatever depending on broad age ranges if it wasn't an already close titled relative.

Walton Simons
May 16, 2010

ELECTRONIC OLD MEN RUNNING THE WORLD
June the Brexit Queen is being persecuted by the London Elite again

voiceless anal fricative
May 6, 2007

Walton Simons posted:

June the Brexit Queen is being persecuted by the London Elite again



this is like the social media version of that Clint Eastwood bit where he talked to the empty chair

oldpainless
Oct 30, 2009

This 📆 post brought to you by RAID💥: SHADOW LEGENDS👥.
RAID💥: SHADOW LEGENDS 👥 - It's for your phone📲TM™ #ad📢

BattyKiara posted:

I was raised calling all older relatives Aunt X or Uncle Y. Including people like my grandmother's half-sister, my grandfather's cousin, my mum's best friend and her husband, and so on. It was a title of respect, and a way of saying we see you as a member of our near family, no matter what bloodlines say.

Same here and I had a gigantic family. Every other weekend my mom would introduce me to a new relative she met that night, all named Uncle Richard.

Flint_Paper
Jun 7, 2004

This isn't cool at all Looshkin! These are dark forces you're titting about with!

More like oldkinfull

Pththya-lyi
Nov 8, 2009

THUNDERDOME LOSER 2020

oldpainless posted:

Same here and I had a gigantic family. Every other weekend my mom would introduce me to a new relative she met that night, all named Uncle Richard.

"Uncle Richard?" Does that mean Lowtax had sex with your mother? Huge if true

Yngwie Mangosteen
Aug 23, 2007

Pththya-lyi posted:

Huge if true

unlikely

Fleta Mcgurn
Oct 5, 2003

Porpoise noise continues.
More like olddadless

Yngwie Mangosteen
Aug 23, 2007

Fleta Mcgurn posted:

More like olddadless

hosed up thing to make fun of a person for.

Fleta Mcgurn
Oct 5, 2003

Porpoise noise continues.

Captain Monkey posted:

hosed up thing to make fun of a person for.

oldpainless posted:

Same here and I had a gigantic family. Every other weekend my mom would introduce me to a new relative she met that night, all named Uncle Richard.

uranium grass
Jan 15, 2005

more like oldtruthless

voiceless anal fricative
May 6, 2007

Captain Monkey posted:

hosed up thing to make fun of a person for.

more like Captain Missedthejoke

Kosmo Gallion
Sep 13, 2013

Jurgan
May 8, 2007

Just pour it directly into your gaping mouth-hole you decadent slut

I, too, have seen Baseketball. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XWSNZe4tGiY&t=324s

Air Skwirl
May 13, 2007

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.
How was the mom's corpse giving him biscuits?

Yngwie Mangosteen
Aug 23, 2007
Why is he bragging about long term necrophilia?

Fleta Mcgurn
Oct 5, 2003

Porpoise noise continues.
Corpse Biscuits is a pro-tier forums handle.

CROWS EVERYWHERE
Dec 17, 2012

CAW CAW CAW

Dinosaur Gum

Skwirl posted:

How was the mom's corpse giving him biscuits?

You bury the corpse with some coins to pay Charon and some biscuits to feed Cerberus :colbert:

Ripper Swarm
Sep 9, 2009

It's not that I hate it. It's that I loathe it.

CROWS EVERYWHERE posted:

You bury the corpse with some coins to pay Charon and some biscuits to feed Cerberus :colbert:

please do not feed your three-headed hellhounds chocolate biscuits

CROWS EVERYWHERE
Dec 17, 2012

CAW CAW CAW

Dinosaur Gum

Ripper Swarm posted:

please do not feed your three-headed hellhounds chocolate biscuits

They're dog safe carob biscuits. As evidenced by the post OP is too dumb to tell the difference between carob biscuits for dogs and chocolate biscuits for humans who gently caress mums.

3D Megadoodoo
Nov 25, 2010

There has been a mistake in translation. When you die it's actually Charo who takes you over the Styx.

Solice Kirsk
Jun 1, 2004

.

3D Megadoodoo posted:

There has been a mistake in translation. When you die it's actually Charo who takes you over the Styx.

Ah, that explains why the ancient Greeks used to leave two guitars on the eyes of their dead.

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.




I love the elements of gay panic, the "not that there's anything wrong with that" need to explain themselves, as well as the fact that the one actual gay bloke is marginalized, even in the story about the 'heroic' crusaders against homophobia.

I mean if you wanted to be charitable, you could argue it is babbys first steps towards tolerance and acceptance, but if this did indeed happen, (which I very much doubt), then it's still weird stupid. Even for teenage boys.

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yeah I eat ass
Mar 14, 2005

only people who enjoy my posting can replace this avatar
Yeah, that's definitely how conversations happen. One party says literally one word, the other parties go on interrupted on their epic speech.

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