UKMT March 2021 - Two Flags One Pole - The Something Awful Forums

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT March 2021 - Two Flags One Pole

Darth Walrus: Feb 13, 2012

big scary monsters posted:

If you turn your entire party into a nationwide CUKTIG you might well hope to be a Chuka Umunna, but most of them are going to be lucky to end up as Mike Gapes.

And they know it. Why do you think they're so utterly vicious to each other? Not many tickets for the gravy train.

# ? Mar 29, 2021 09:30

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# ? May 24, 2024 23:50

therattle: Jul 24, 2007; Soiled Meat

crispix posted:

they def vote tory imo

that is wildly inaccurate because i cannot imagine boris doing sex to ever be something you could describe as "making love". it's bonking or rumpy pumpy

The only true lovemaking he can do is masturbation.

# ? Mar 29, 2021 09:33

Failed Imagineer: Sep 22, 2018

Hard to think of a worse sex word than "rumpy pumpy", but I'm sure the thread can surprise me

# ? Mar 29, 2021 09:33

Doccykins: Feb 21, 2006

rutting

# ? Mar 29, 2021 09:36

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

the glaswegians have gettin one's hole :monocle:

# ? Mar 29, 2021 09:36

Convex: Aug 19, 2010

Imagining Johnson exclaiming "Thwack! Pow! Smash!" in time with his sweaty thrusts

# ? Mar 29, 2021 09:38

kecske: Feb 28, 2011; it's round, like always

Failed Imagineer posted:

Hard to think of a worse sex word than "rumpy pumpy", but I'm sure the thread can surprise me

what if you're pumping something other than their rump?

# ? Mar 29, 2021 09:38

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

gettin pumpt, that's another one :scotland:

# ? Mar 29, 2021 09:39

Jedit: Dec 10, 2011; Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

crispix posted:

the glaswegians have gettin one's hole

But we all know what happened to Wee Jock, so that's alright.

# ? Mar 29, 2021 09:39

forkboy84: Jun 13, 2012; Corgis love bread. And Puro

big scary monsters posted:

If you turn your entire party into a nationwide CUKTIG you might well hope to be a Chuka Umunna, but most of them are going to be lucky to end up as Mike Gapes.

At least Gapes is memorable in his milky badness. These cunts are Gavin Shakur, the CUKTIGger who nobody remembers including other CUKTIGgers

# ? Mar 29, 2021 09:41

crispix: Mar 28, 2015; Grand-Maman m'a raconté
_{(Les éditions des amitiés franco-québécoises)}

Hello, dear

as far as i could tell, getting your hole was an idiom so it could even be used by gay men who prefer to receive, for example

# ? Mar 29, 2021 09:41

keep punching joe: Jan 22, 2006; Die Satan!

Nothing better of a weekend that meeting a randomer in a pub and getting ones Nat King Cole.

forkboy84 posted:

Why would you not want SNP to bleed support yo the Greens? Literally a better party in every single way, and even if you didn't think so, voting for them doesn't hurt the Nats a jot because they got 4 list MSPs last time for 1 million votes.

Its because I'm a blind SNP loyalist, and would much prefer that the greens poached their support from dissafected Labour/Liberals.

Do agree though that the constituency/list system is bad though and we should go to a fully proportiional parliament.

keep punching joe fucked around with this message at 09:47 on Mar 29, 2021

# ? Mar 29, 2021 09:44

Microplastics: Jul 6, 2007; It's what's for dinner.

Failed Imagineer posted:

Hard to think of a worse sex word than "rumpy pumpy", but I'm sure the thread can surprise me

Bumping uglies

# ? Mar 29, 2021 09:46

Jaeluni Asjil: Apr 18, 2018; Sorry I thought you were a landlord when I gave you your old avatar!

Getting your end away.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V5lJp9LBi54

quote:

I'm gonna get my end away
I'm gonna get my end away
I'm gonna get my evil way

# ? Mar 29, 2021 09:47

Lungboy: Aug 23, 2002; NEED SQUAT FORM HELP

Pistol_Pete posted:

So is Dodds getting sacked or what. Half of Twitter's talking like it's already happened.

No, the briefings have all been that she'll go after the locals, sacrificial lamb to show Labour are doing something.

# ? Mar 29, 2021 09:53

sebzilla: Mar 17, 2009; Kid's blasting everything in sight with that new-fangled musket.

Far too much discussion of Boris' johnson itt

# ? Mar 29, 2021 09:59

TACD: Oct 27, 2000

Loudly ringing the emergency alarm and screaming at everyone to get out now before this thread descends any further into the nightmare pit of writing Boris Johnson sex acts fanfic

# ? Mar 29, 2021 10:00

No Dignity: Oct 15, 2007

I do feel a little for Dodds, how the heck are you meant to make an impression as shadow chancellor when your party policy is to back the status quo in all but the finest details? It does seem like she's just being scapegoated for Keith's lack of vision

No Dignity fucked around with this message at 10:17 on Mar 29, 2021

# ? Mar 29, 2021 10:14

Small Strange Bird: Sep 22, 2006; Merci, chaton!

multijoe posted:

I do feel a little for Dodds, how the heck are you meant to make an impression as shadow chancellor when your party policy is to back the status quo in all but the finest details? It does seem like she's just bring scapegoated for Keith's lack of vision

Totally read that last line in Palpatine's voice.

# ? Mar 29, 2021 10:15

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

TACD posted:

Loudly ringing the emergency alarm and screaming at everyone to get out now before this thread descends any further into the nightmare pit of writing Boris Johnson sex acts fanfic

Gove had noticed subtle changes in Johnson's behaviours since the leadership had come into his possession. These changes made Gove extremely horny, especially the way he would always have his fingers wrapped around the leadership. Gove wondered what those soft hands would feel around his member. It kept him up all night, most nights, if he did fall asleep, he would dream of Johnson and his magic hands. But tonight was different, tonight he was going to feed his desire, the fire inside him.. He wanted to surprise Johnson tonight.

# ? Mar 29, 2021 10:19

serious gaylord: Sep 16, 2007; what.

What the gently caress is that.

# ? Mar 29, 2021 10:23

sebzilla: Mar 17, 2009; Kid's blasting everything in sight with that new-fangled musket.

Delete thread, start again in April pls

# ? Mar 29, 2021 10:25

mrpwase: Apr 21, 2010; I HAVE GREAT AVATAR IDEAS
For the Many, Not the Few

TACD posted:

Loudly ringing the emergency alarm and screaming at everyone to get out now before this thread descends any further into the nightmare pit of writing Boris Johnson sex acts fanfic

I found an old hard drive while cleaning yesterday, and on it was some Clegg/Cameron slashfic from 2010. Ah, memories~

# ? Mar 29, 2021 10:26

goddamnedtwisto: Dec 31, 2004; If you ask me about the mole people in the London Underground, I WILL be forced to kill you; Fun Shoe

This thread needs a cold shower and a long walk.

# ? Mar 29, 2021 10:38

keep punching joe: Jan 22, 2006; Die Satan!

Thread is just jealous about what a legendary shagger Boris is imo.

# ? Mar 29, 2021 10:42

TRIXNET: Jun 6, 2004; META AS FUCK.

Inexplicable Humblebrag posted:

Gove had noticed subtle changes in Johnson's behaviours since the leadership had come into his possession. These changes made Gove extremely horny, especially the way he would always have his fingers wrapped around the leadership. Gove wondered what those soft hands would feel around his member. It kept him up all night, most nights, if he did fall asleep, he would dream of Johnson and his magic hands. But tonight was different, tonight he was going to feed his desire, the fire inside him.. He wanted to surprise Johnson tonight.

Read aloud by Gilbert Gottfried.

# ? Mar 29, 2021 10:45

Ash Crimson: Apr 4, 2010

keep punching joe posted:

Thread is just jealous about what a legendary shagger Boris is imo.

do you think he waxes his taint, his chode, his dilweed, his lancastrian badger

# ? Mar 29, 2021 10:46

Angepain: Jul 13, 2012; what keeps happening to my clothes

I am forced into speech because men of science have refused to follow my advice without knowing why. It is altogether against my will that I tell my reasons for opposing this contemplated bonking of the Prime Minister—with its vast sausage-hunt and its wholesale boring and melting of his rambunctious demeanour—and I am the more reluctant because my warning may be in vain. Doubt of the real facts, as I must reveal them, is inevitable; yet if I suppressed what will seem extravagant and incredible there would be nothing left. The hitherto withheld photographs, both ordinary and aërial, will count in my favour; for they are damnably vivid and graphic. Still, they will be doubted because of the great lengths to which clever fakery can be carried. The ink drawings, of course, will be jeered at as obvious impostures; notwithstanding a strangeness of technique which art experts ought to remark and puzzle over.

# ? Mar 29, 2021 10:47

forkboy84: Jun 13, 2012; Corgis love bread. And Puro

keep punching joe posted:

Nothing better of a weekend that meeting a randomer in a pub and getting ones Nat King Cole.

Its because I'm a blind SNP loyalist, and would much prefer that the greens poached their support from dissafected Labour/Liberals.

Do agree though that the constituency/list system is bad though and we should go to a fully proportiional parliament.

I don't think the system is bad, I think it's a compromise and it's not a bad compromise all things considered. It's just that people do not actually understand how it works as showcased by your post.

The SNP and Greens are not in competition, not really. Like, maybe in Glasgow Kelvin Patrick Harvie could win the constituency but that'd be a huge upset. No where else, not at Holyrood.

Lemme repeat this: if you don't live in the South of Scotland region then your vote for them is less use than abstaining. Remove the South of Scotland region and the SNP got 1 list MSP for 833,370 votes. So if you want a pro independence majority the best bet is to vote for another indy party on the list, and the Greens are the only pro independence party who will both get seats at Holyrood and push the Nats left.

Voting SNP & SNP just means more list Tories.

# ? Mar 29, 2021 10:49

kecske: Feb 28, 2011; it's round, like always

SpicePro posted:

Read aloud by Gilbert Gottfried.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=T1lH8VVcrUg&feature=youtu.be

# ? Mar 29, 2021 11:05

Eararaldor: Jul 30, 2007; Fanboys, ruining gaming since the 1980's

Mebh posted:

I mean. Its easier to fall into than you think.

I worked for a company that primarily made games for 40+ women. It was a dwindling market share. I became convinced we had to expand our audience or die.

So I poured resources into making a completely different game. Targeted at young women. We had no young women in the company but eh, details. Sink or swim right.

The game was a colossal failure. Sure every young woman we got to try it enjoyed it but our entire market apparatus, all our user testing, all our experience was in a different market. We couldn't get anyone to even look at us twice.

The difference being this was a throwaway project that we took a calculated risk on.

Maybe that's how the labour right really view the party? Something they can take a risk and throw away if it doesn't work. After all. We'll all still vote for them right? Right?

I really want to hear more about this! Are you allowed to elaborate?

I teach kids Computer Science and I sometimes give them stories of working in the Games Industry as many that opt into the subject as aspiring Game developers. Hell one of my starters was dedicated to project management and could not resist mentioning Star Citizen.

# ? Mar 29, 2021 11:08

MikeCrotch: Nov 5, 2011; I AM UNJUSTIFIABLY PROUD OF MY SPAGHETTI BOLOGNESE RECIPE

YES, IT IS AN INCREDIBLY SIMPLE DISH

NO, IT IS NOT NORMAL TO USE A PEPPERAMI INSTEAD OF MINCED MEAT

YES, THERE IS TOO MUCH SALT IN MY RECIPE

NO, I WON'T STOP SHARING IT

more like BOLLOCKnese

Darth Walrus posted:

And they know it. Why do you think they're so utterly vicious to each other? Not many tickets for the gravy train.

The most telling line in the recent articles was some Labour apparatchik complaining that Keith hadn't got credit for all the hard work he'd done like

- Getting a new General Secretary
- Shoring up his majority on the NEC
- Putting a new leader in Scotland

i.e. all internal party politicking. Actually having policy and winning elections is secondary to consolidating power within the party.

I should also say that the Labour right have, for the most part, totally internalise the idea that people really, really hated Corbyn and the left, and that simply making Labour "not left" is a (and really the only possible) winning strategy. This is one of the reasons Dodds has to go - she was considered to be a sop to the left since she worked with John McDonnell before!

# ? Mar 29, 2021 11:12

Convex: Aug 19, 2010

goddamnedtwisto posted:

This thread needs a cold shower and a long wank.

# ? Mar 29, 2021 11:24

Beefeater1980: Sep 12, 2008; My God, it's full of Horatios!

Shakespeare mentioned earlier, and nobody described it as making the beast with two backs yet? For shame.

# ? Mar 29, 2021 11:26

Failed Imagineer: Sep 22, 2018

Convex posted:

You can't take a long wank off a short pee-er

# ? Mar 29, 2021 11:27

blues thief: Apr 1, 2013

"Out, damned spot; out, I say." - Boris to couch cumstain.

# ? Mar 29, 2021 11:30

Angepain: Jul 13, 2012; what keeps happening to my clothes

forkboy84 posted:

Lemme repeat this: if you don't live in the South of Scotland region then your vote for them is less use than abstaining. Remove the South of Scotland region and the SNP got 1 list MSP for 833,370 votes. So if you want a pro independence majority the best bet is to vote for another indy party on the list, and the Greens are the only pro independence party who will both get seats at Holyrood and push the Nats left.

I'm not that convinced that gaming the system for more independence seats is going to do much in terms of the indyref. Even assuming there is literally anything capable of shaming Boris into giving people what they want, if there's a lot of pro-indy seats and not a majority (or even a small majority) of actual voters for pro-indy parties then they're just going to use the vote numbers to argue against it. and if there is a majority voting for pro-indy parties then there's set to be a comfortable majority of pro-indy seats anyway from the projections i can find.

that said, if you're proposing it just for "less tory msps" reasons then that would work, i guess there may be questions of illegitimacy but i don't know if it's even something that can be measured - how many green list voters are voting tactically? hard to say. I don't think a whole lot, personally, but that's just my idle reckoning and not actual facts. definitely more plausible deniability for the tactical green voters than for the tactical voters for "Hello, I Am Alex Salmond And Am Literally Asking You To Game The System"

anyway the real reason to vote green in the list is because they're pretty good. they're pretty decent. i'm actually voting green in the constituency because one's standing and the first two are SNP and Labour and I do not care which of those gets one less list seat, your local tactics situation may vary

# ? Mar 29, 2021 11:35