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The Puppy Bowl
Jan 31, 2013

A dog, in the house.

*woof*
McCorkangelo

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Kevino07
Oct 16, 2008

Grittybeard posted:

Could have been sculpted by Michelangelo.

Specifically the Ninja Turtle

Gonz
Dec 22, 2009

"Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?"
Maclunkey McCorkle

shirts and skins
Jun 25, 2007

Good morning!
*tips fedora*

M'Corkle

TheGreyGhost
Feb 14, 2012

“Go win the Heimlich Trophy!”

Eifert Posting posted:

He had the potential to be really good in college he was just limited by poor quarterback pla- Ohhhhh.

Collins was objectively the best receiver on the Michigan offense for a few years, and the only guy that was close in DPJ has been a very very serviceable WR3/4 for the Browns already. My biggest knock on him is that he frequently would over complicate routes and catches like he was trying to force the coaches to believe he could do something and end up tied up with dudes he should be mossing. Consequently, his routes actually look a lot like what happens when like Auburn or other extremely limited passing teams get WRs in the league where they think they can solve the complexity of the offense by always stepping more which is one of those rules that’s true at first in college but not in the nfl. If college is about learning when to chop your steps and cut more precisely, the NFL is about using only the minimum steps it takes you to cut maximally. He’s still learning when to break things because of that offense and it’s lack of ability to develop him, but he’s athletically more than adequate to be an outside receiver in the league.



Doltos posted:

I give Jerry an A+ as always because a property tycoon that stumbled into an idiot selling one of the most valuable franchises in the history of the world is somehow better at evaluating talent than whole teams of scouts

I got cussed out in the office once because I made the point that bengals fans making the excuse that a lack of front office staff means you can’t be too hard on lovely drafting is basically blown out the window by the fact that Jerry and his failsons routinely make half the league look like they’ve never watched a college game and run it just like a family office as well. Yes, mike brown is intensely lovely and runs the team like a power fantasy avenging all the wrongs he felt afflicted his father, but he still should know better than this if like a moron oil guy like Jerry can watch enough tape to get things sort of right. Like, there is something to be said for not over complicating poo poo and just taking guys who physically test well who dominated in college at some level. You don’t always have to talk yourself into insane project guys or “high floor but is it enough” and just draft dudes who fall somewhere between those two—they become all pros just as often.

AndrewP
Apr 21, 2010

after Bateman the Ravens took a bunch of swings on big athletic freaks who may or may not be good at the game of football. feels like a very boom or bust draft.

sean10mm
Jun 29, 2005

It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, MAD-2R World
What Jerry can't do to save his life is hire a head coach worth a poo poo.

He started out hiring a real coach and hated it even though it promptly got him 2 rings because Johnsom got all the credit.

Just looking at personnel his biggest disasters were bad FA/trade moves he made trying to be a big wheeler-dealer. Like "Sell the farm for Roy Williams (not that one, the other one) YEE-HAW' type poo poo.

sean10mm fucked around with this message at 11:44 on May 3, 2021

Silly Burrito
Nov 27, 2007

SET A COURSE FOR
THE FLAVOR QUADRANT
At least the Saints won't have to repeat next grade.

Chucktesla
Jul 13, 2014

Grey Ghost, do you have any thoughts on Josh Palmer and Tre' McKitty? As far as I understand it Josh Palmer is a solid to good receiver who beat Surtain that one time but was held back by maybe the worst quarterback in college football, my post draft optimism brain hopes he turns into the wide receiver equivalent of Alvin Kamara. As for Tre'... He sounds like he's not very good at football, how far off am I.

Eifert Posting
Apr 1, 2007

Most of the time he catches it every time.
Grimey Drawer

TheGreyGhost posted:

I got cussed out in the office once because I made the point that bengals fans making the excuse that a lack of front office staff means you can’t be too hard on lovely drafting is basically blown out the window by the fact that Jerry and his failsons routinely make half the league look like they’ve never watched a college game and run it just like a family office as well. Yes, mike brown is intensely lovely and runs the team like a power fantasy avenging all the wrongs he felt afflicted his father, but he still should know better than this if like a moron oil guy like Jerry can watch enough tape to get things sort of right. Like, there is something to be said for not over complicating poo poo and just taking guys who physically test well who dominated in college at some level. You don’t always have to talk yourself into insane project guys or “high floor but is it enough” and just draft dudes who fall somewhere between those two—they become all pros just as often.

This is my take as well more or less. I'm sure the small staff doesn't help them, but the bigger problem is that they have all these ideas on what good teams do despite only ever really being a good team for a few years. For example, they don't value O linemen appropriately in FA and love unfinished projects in the draft at O-Line. They end up always feeling like they've got someone on the roster or someone in the draft who's ready when they usually aren't. I wish one of their picks had been a safer, more finished product.

Joey Freshwater
Jun 20, 2004

Always playing with my meat
Grimey Drawer

Chucktesla posted:

Grey Ghost, do you have any thoughts on Josh Palmer and Tre' McKitty? As far as I understand it Josh Palmer is a solid to good receiver who beat Surtain that one time but was held back by maybe the worst quarterback in college football, my post draft optimism brain hopes he turns into the wide receiver equivalent of Alvin Kamara. As for Tre'... He sounds like he's not very good at football, how far off am I.

You didn’t ask me but as a UT fan, Palmer is a good to very good receiver who yes, played in a terrible offense with an even worse QB. Has a bunch of potential, good route running and good hands. I don’t see him ever being a #1 guy but he’ll be a solid 2-3 some day.

Eifert Posting
Apr 1, 2007

Most of the time he catches it every time.
Grimey Drawer
I'm really annoyed at how much I like Pittsburgh's undrafted free agents. Shakur Brown and Rico Bussey Jr both should have been drafted. Watson also has potential.

kiimo
Jul 24, 2003

*Complaining about my team's draft grade alert*

So many draft grades are infuriating because they just look at the players the teams acquired rather than examining who was available when the team selected and grading off what options they had and what direction they went. Of course that would take a lot of time to do so nobody does it.

Oh Atlanta got Pitts? WOW what a great selection A+

lord help you if you traded your first round pick, hmmm I'm just not impressed with what the Chiefs acquired in the draft C- when in reality Veach did an incredible job getting steals.

Doltos
Dec 28, 2005

🤌🤌🤌

TheGreyGhost posted:

I got cussed out in the office once because I made the point that bengals fans making the excuse that a lack of front office staff means you can’t be too hard on lovely drafting is basically blown out the window by the fact that Jerry and his failsons routinely make half the league look like they’ve never watched a college game and run it just like a family office as well. Yes, mike brown is intensely lovely and runs the team like a power fantasy avenging all the wrongs he felt afflicted his father, but he still should know better than this if like a moron oil guy like Jerry can watch enough tape to get things sort of right. Like, there is something to be said for not over complicating poo poo and just taking guys who physically test well who dominated in college at some level. You don’t always have to talk yourself into insane project guys or “high floor but is it enough” and just draft dudes who fall somewhere between those two—they become all pros just as often.

Yeah exactly plus Jerry subscribes to ignore red flags so he ends up grabbing every single top tier athlete that other stodgy owners don't want besmirching the brand. Kelvin Joseph, Josh Ball, Micah Parsons, love it.

3 DONG HORSE
May 22, 2008

I'd like to thank Satan for everything he's done for this organization


kiimo posted:

*Complaining about my team's draft grade alert*

So many draft grades are infuriating because they just look at the players the teams acquired rather than examining who was available when the team selected and grading off what options they had and what direction they went. Of course that would take a lot of time to do so nobody does it.

Oh Atlanta got Pitts? WOW what a great selection A+

lord help you if you traded your first round pick, hmmm I'm just not impressed with what the Chiefs acquired in the draft C- when in reality Veach did an incredible job getting steals.

That's how I feel, too. "You didn't draft who I mocked? B," although it does remain to be seen if Surtain over Fields was the right choice...

My only hope is that Fields is a true Bears QB at heart.

Paint Crop Pro
Mar 22, 2007

Find someone who values you like Rick Spielman values 7th round picks.



kiimo posted:

*Complaining about my team's draft grade alert*

So many draft grades are infuriating because they just look at the players the teams acquired rather than examining who was available when the team selected and grading off what options they had and what direction they went. Of course that would take a lot of time to do so nobody does it.

Oh Atlanta got Pitts? WOW what a great selection A+

lord help you if you traded your first round pick, hmmm I'm just not impressed with what the Chiefs acquired in the draft C- when in reality Veach did an incredible job getting steals.

I also dont care for a lot of draft grades because people will choose a player and the response will be "This is a reach why not trade back?" When there is a good chance either no one wanted to trade up, or they were offering lmao levels of compensation.

If your stuck in that spot you gotta take the first person on your board.

Eifert Posting
Apr 1, 2007

Most of the time he catches it every time.
Grimey Drawer
I'm real glad the cowboys saved us from Josh Ball. I feel very confident the Bengals would have taken him if he had been available. Boys took him one pick before we got Smith.

kiimo
Jul 24, 2003

Paint Crop Pro posted:

I also dont care for a lot of draft grades because people will choose a player and the response will be "This is a reach why not trade back?" When there is a good chance either no one wanted to trade up, or they were offering lmao levels of compensation.

If your stuck in that spot you gotta take the first person on your board.

Man for sure. I love the draft so for like 30 years I've listened to fans say the trade down argument like you flip a switch. It's as dumb as the "player A went to school B so result C based on other players from said school"

Borsche69
May 8, 2014

AndrewP posted:

after Bateman the Ravens took a bunch of swings on big athletic freaks who may or may not be good at the game of football. feels like a very boom or bust draft.

I had a feeling that was going to be the nature of a draft where a lot of players aren't going to have much 2020 film. Wallace also fits the Bateman model of 'slick route runner, mostly average measurables', though.

Eifert Posting
Apr 1, 2007

Most of the time he catches it every time.
Grimey Drawer
I'm still pretty incredulous that the Bengals got two fours for moving down eight spots in the second round.

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!
I really wish Jerry had gotten his way and drafted Manziel.

shirts and skins
Jun 25, 2007

Good morning!

kiimo posted:

*Complaining about my team's draft grade alert*

So many draft grades are infuriating because they just look at the players the teams acquired rather than examining who was available when the team selected and grading off what options they had and what direction they went. Of course that would take a lot of time to do so nobody does it.

Oh Atlanta got Pitts? WOW what a great selection A+

lord help you if you traded your first round pick, hmmm I'm just not impressed with what the Chiefs acquired in the draft C- when in reality Veach did an incredible job getting steals.

You don't have to read draft grades. They're useless. Maybe read them for mockery purposes?

Like...

https://seattle.sbnation.com/2012/4/29/2985799/nfl-draft-grades-2012-seahawks

DariusLikewise
Oct 4, 2008

You wore that on Halloween?
Rams draft rating is "STAFFORD NEEDS WEAPONS"

Amy Pole Her
Jun 17, 2002
People reactions to other people's reactions to mock drafts is the new people's reaction to mock drafts

AndrewP
Apr 21, 2010

Borsche69 posted:

Wallace also fits the Bateman model of 'slick route runner, mostly average measurables', though.

Bateman's measurables are good! He has very long arms, too.

Watching tape of them both and he definitely looks like a class above Wallace.

D-LINK
Oct 1, 2007

I was talking to peachy Peach about kissy Kiss. He bought me a soda.

Eifert Posting posted:

I'm really annoyed at how much I like Pittsburgh's undrafted free agents. Shakur Brown and Rico Bussey Jr both should have been drafted. Watson also has potential.

Somehow ended up with a potential starter at slot corner in a UDFA. Works for me

kiimo
Jul 24, 2003

shirts and skins posted:

You don't have to read draft grades. They're useless.




I like reading draft grades, like I like reading mock drafts. I think you're under the impression that i don't like being angry and offended

TheGreyGhost
Feb 14, 2012

“Go win the Heimlich Trophy!”
Well, if we're going to post stupid grades and mocks, let's all laugh at a really really bad early mock


Some notes:

- There are absolutely not this many QBs I take in the 1st next year. Rattler is proooobably worthy of being a #1, but he's still got a to rein in some of his gunslinger tendencies--best velocity in the class. Howell is very talented and accurate but has some odd technical behaviors with his shoulder and feet, and the UNC offense is insanely limited in route trees and concepts which is going to skeeve some GMs immediately. Slovis plays a very similar system to Rattler but doesn't have quite the physical gifts--more of a Goff/Mayfield than a Kyler. If Desmond Ridder goes in round 1, I'm assuming Coronavirus has killed every single QB in division 1, because that dude is not accurate and has a baby arm. Malik Willis is a dude who has never actually put it together, but does have some crazy tools/air under his ball. If Howell is playing in a limited offense, Willis is playing in some Hugh Freeze high school bullshit and is going to look like a Jordan Love type prospect in the absolute best case scenario. It's a 2-3 QB class at the high end, with everyone else having some way bigger problems.


- There are absolutely a bunch of good WRs next year. Pickens/Olave/Wilson/Metchie/Ross are going to be a really really solid set of guys just off of who is guaranteed to be available next year. Putting Ross that high coming off of spine surgery with a new QB is amazingly dumb when Pickens is already a better player. Olave and Metchie probably are the next two guys off the board and are purer speed guys who give up some size relative to Pickens or Ross. Wilson's going to be loved for starting all over the place in college. I just can't fathom Ross above any of the other 4 right now.

- Pretty much every O-lineman listed is a project. Maybe Neal is the smallest project (lol), but there's no one on this list like a Sewell or Slater where people are marking their name in red for a year from now off of the full tape right now.

- This edge class also makes no sense. Thibodeaux is a no-poo poo top 5 potential guy, but pretty much every other edge looks like a speed rusher right now outside of like, maybe Karlaftis. Every other edge listed is a speed specialist, which seems cool, until you remember that guys like Harrison weren't even the best edge on their team (Tyreke Smith) and Bonitto benefits from being in a league where you can be a 235 pound pass rusher who will immediately get bodied in the NFL. If I'm guessing, Engbare probably is the most likely dude to rise, but this really reads like they're just trying to pick guys from teams that will probably be good.

- Mocking Leal to replace Danny Shelton is amazing. That's like 100 pound difference between the two, and Leal is emphatically not a nose. Next year's DT class probably has a lot of rush tackles and not nearly as many noses, so you're just...not likely to try to replace a nose early in a draft with no noses.

- Breece Hall will run about a 4.6 and is absolutely not a first round value.

- Not a single pure LB in the draft--other than an off-ball Bama tweener who looked good but was used heavily as a Fire zone player.

- Stingley is the best CB in years, but Elam is very very good too. Gardner is absolutely not CB3.


Just an absolute mess of a mock even by year early standards.

Leperflesh
May 17, 2007

I made a UDFA thread so if anyone wants to talk about the post-draft draft, that's a place to do it! Every team save the Pats has reported at least one signing and some have a dozen.

kiimo
Jul 24, 2003

Well I like the Chiefs pick and they're 32 so it's fine with me

Ehud
Sep 19, 2003

football.

TheGreyGhost posted:

Well, if we're going to post stupid grades and mocks, let's all laugh at a really really bad early mock


Some notes:

- There are absolutely not this many QBs I take in the 1st next year. Rattler is proooobably worthy of being a #1, but he's still got a to rein in some of his gunslinger tendencies--best velocity in the class. Howell is very talented and accurate but has some odd technical behaviors with his shoulder and feet, and the UNC offense is insanely limited in route trees and concepts which is going to skeeve some GMs immediately. Slovis plays a very similar system to Rattler but doesn't have quite the physical gifts--more of a Goff/Mayfield than a Kyler. If Desmond Ridder goes in round 1, I'm assuming Coronavirus has killed every single QB in division 1, because that dude is not accurate and has a baby arm. Malik Willis is a dude who has never actually put it together, but does have some crazy tools/air under his ball. If Howell is playing in a limited offense, Willis is playing in some Hugh Freeze high school bullshit and is going to look like a Jordan Love type prospect in the absolute best case scenario. It's a 2-3 QB class at the high end, with everyone else having some way bigger problems.


- There are absolutely a bunch of good WRs next year. Pickens/Olave/Wilson/Metchie/Ross are going to be a really really solid set of guys just off of who is guaranteed to be available next year. Putting Ross that high coming off of spine surgery with a new QB is amazingly dumb when Pickens is already a better player. Olave and Metchie probably are the next two guys off the board and are purer speed guys who give up some size relative to Pickens or Ross. Wilson's going to be loved for starting all over the place in college. I just can't fathom Ross above any of the other 4 right now.

- Pretty much every O-lineman listed is a project. Maybe Neal is the smallest project (lol), but there's no one on this list like a Sewell or Slater where people are marking their name in red for a year from now off of the full tape right now.

- This edge class also makes no sense. Thibodeaux is a no-poo poo top 5 potential guy, but pretty much every other edge looks like a speed rusher right now outside of like, maybe Karlaftis. Every other edge listed is a speed specialist, which seems cool, until you remember that guys like Harrison weren't even the best edge on their team (Tyreke Smith) and Bonitto benefits from being in a league where you can be a 235 pound pass rusher who will immediately get bodied in the NFL. If I'm guessing, Engbare probably is the most likely dude to rise, but this really reads like they're just trying to pick guys from teams that will probably be good.

- Mocking Leal to replace Danny Shelton is amazing. That's like 100 pound difference between the two, and Leal is emphatically not a nose. Next year's DT class probably has a lot of rush tackles and not nearly as many noses, so you're just...not likely to try to replace a nose early in a draft with no noses.

- Breece Hall will run about a 4.6 and is absolutely not a first round value.

- Not a single pure LB in the draft--other than an off-ball Bama tweener who looked good but was used heavily as a Fire zone player.

- Stingley is the best CB in years, but Elam is very very good too. Gardner is absolutely not CB3.


Just an absolute mess of a mock even by year early standards.

Dolphins are going to the AFC Championship!!!!!!!!!!!

49ers pick


edit: the Lions picking at 30 lol

Magicpants
Sep 15, 2011


Certified Poster
signing udfas shows weakness. if you get every pick right, you don't need udfas.

Eifert Posting
Apr 1, 2007

Most of the time he catches it every time.
Grimey Drawer
I wonder what the absolute ceiling is for Stingley if he has a monster year? Surely they'll talk up some quarterback into the number one pick; has a corner ever gone number one or number two before?

really queer Christmas
Apr 22, 2014

Ehud posted:

Dolphins are going to the AFC Championship!!!!!!!!!!!

49ers pick


edit: the Lions picking at 30 lol

Lions have the rams pick

Ehud
Sep 19, 2003

football.

really queer Christmas posted:

Lions have the rams pick

:ughh:

I'm having a day

Doltos
Dec 28, 2005

🤌🤌🤌

Eifert Posting posted:

I wonder what the absolute ceiling is for Stingley if he has a monster year? Surely they'll talk up some quarterback into the number one pick; has a corner ever gone number one or number two before?

Draft sucks next year at the moment so Stingley/Thibodeaux might be the #1 if Rattler sucks. He's a complete put together CB but I mean he's been burnt a lot in marquee match ups. DeVonta Smith basically ate that entire secondary though.

Ehud
Sep 19, 2003

football.

Doltos posted:

Draft sucks next year at the moment so Stingley/Thibodeaux might be the #1 if Rattler sucks. He's a complete put together CB but I mean he's been burnt a lot in marquee match ups. DeVonta Smith basically ate that entire secondary though.

You're not very optimistic about Sam Howell?

YOLOsubmarine
Oct 19, 2004

When asked which Pokemon he evolved into, Kamara pauses.

"Motherfucking, what's that big dragon shit? That orange motherfucker. Charizard."

You can’t really grade anyone on LSUs defense last year because Pelini hosed it up so badly that nobody seemed to know what they were actually supposed to be doing.

Alaois
Feb 7, 2012

I can't wait for next year's draft just to see peoples reactions to a guy named Spencer Rattler who looks the way Spencer Rattler looks

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Eifert Posting
Apr 1, 2007

Most of the time he catches it every time.
Grimey Drawer
I remember watching the draft coverage being super confused because the commentators were talking about no one wanting to trade future picks because this next draft class is going to be really good. I was confused because basically everyone in this thread has been saying over and over again that next year's class is going to be really poor.


Then I remembered that draft commentators are idiots and also goons are idiots (including myself).

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