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The only reason small/medium dogs and cats win fights against people is because it makes you kind of look rude to suplex a cat so we don't do it because we know it can't kill us. But if money is on the line and nobody will think badly about you for doing it, you should be able to kick its rear end really.
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May 16, 2021 01:27
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May 16, 2021 01:29
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Do you forget that I can also bite, Fido? This will be your undoing
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May 16, 2021 01:33
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When I was about 12, my cat went completely mental and suddenly attacked me for no reason. She was really going at it, I still have scars all over my body. But even as a frightened child, I fought her off fairly easily in a matter of a minute. If you think you can't take on a regular house cat, you might have some confidence issues, to be frank.
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May 16, 2021 01:34
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yeah I eat rear end posted:The only reason small/medium dogs and cats win fights against people is because it makes you kind of look rude to suplex a cat so we don't do it because we know it can't kill us. But if money is on the line and nobody will think badly about you for doing it, you should be able to kick its rear end really. PYF Meme/Macro: You kind of look rude suplexing a cat.
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May 16, 2021 01:44
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Once I hadn't slept in about 3 weeks and locked myself out of my apartment with my cat and didn't want to let her down because she didn't know the neighborhood and I was afraid she would get lost . After about 15 minutes she kinda started freaking out about the time my neighbor got home and scratched the poo poo out of my chest back and arms but I didn't let her go because I was in some kind of dissociative trance or shock or something idk, but they got home and let me in the building and my door wasn't locked so it all worked out. I'm okay now and also if you're impervious to your own pain and can find a grip on the cat you should have no trouble subduing it.
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May 16, 2021 01:49
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I can definitely fight a horse.
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May 16, 2021 01:49
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horses are really good at just killing themselves so if you can duck and dodge for a bit you'll probably win
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May 16, 2021 01:52
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Mechafunkzilla posted:horses are really good at just killing themselves so if you can duck and dodge for a bit you'll probably win Punch and roll.
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May 16, 2021 01:53
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Mechafunkzilla posted:horses are really good at just killing themselves so if you can duck and dodge for a bit you'll probably win horses don't generally attack people so you could also just leave. unless you're locked in some kind of blood arena in which case you should try using the bones of previous combatants
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May 16, 2021 01:54
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Considering the next few lines in this scene this is perfect in more ways than one.
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May 16, 2021 01:55
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start at the smallest animal and use the corpses to subdue each next biggest animal, monster hunter style
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May 16, 2021 01:57
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Large dogs are probably the line where humans start having trouble
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May 16, 2021 01:58
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I face off against a FULL ALPHA GRAYBACK gorilla. He snorts and begins his charge at me. I whip around and 360 NOSCOPE SIGN-LANGUAGE at him, making the signs for "we are brothers!". He stops shorts, cocks his head, and then we leave the clearing bros for life. We head out to get our burg on, and then back home to get some COD Warfare in. Gorilla bro is a fiend with a FAMAS and full armor. Fist bumps all around.
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May 16, 2021 02:02
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Facebook Aunt posted:Most animals don't want to fight to the death. Even predators don't like to take fights where they might get hurt. Does simply not dieing and getting the animal to leave count as a win?
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May 16, 2021 02:07
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Splicer posted:Depends on the animal. Brown bear? Yes. Squirrel? Not so much. if you're trying to kill a squirrel barehanded you've already lost no matter the results. thats some florida man poo poo
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May 16, 2021 02:17
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Mechafunkzilla posted:horses are really good at just killing themselves so if you can duck and dodge for a bit you'll probably win I would simply kick an anthill at a horse and let the horse kill itself as it tries to grapple with the concept of a number beyond 3 https://twitter.com/ftk_artist/status/1391587577518559234 https://twitter.com/emichen88/status/1392738132722733059 https://twitter.com/LikeAndBlock/status/1392640160655945729 https://twitter.com/swell_reads/status/1392663034045235201 https://twitter.com/GinzoBall/status/1372308848682356739 https://twitter.com/vagrunt/status/1392565891464843274 https://twitter.com/DatingSims/status/1388529642861174784 https://twitter.com/baldwinvoices/status/1388945078660517890 
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May 16, 2021 02:18
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May 16, 2021 02:18
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I can clear an entire field of bears using nothing but the power of rock n roll
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May 16, 2021 02:19
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Somebody doesn't have a cat
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May 16, 2021 02:23
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Wow
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May 16, 2021 02:25
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this thread rn: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mdspL0IQCR0
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May 16, 2021 02:30
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Finally! A jacket that has room for my gut!
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May 16, 2021 02:31
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That zookeeper vs harambe answered the question of man vs gorilla
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May 16, 2021 02:36
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The consensus among guys at my martial arts gym is that a trained fighter has a good shot against a large dog or maaaybe a wolf, but anything bigger gets very dicey very quickly. That chart mostly just illustrates how bad the Dunning-Kruger effect is when it comes to fighting. I mean, an *elephant*?
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May 16, 2021 02:43
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bike tory posted:That zookeeper vs harambe answered the question of man vs gorilla No see, the zookeeper didn't know they were fighting
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May 16, 2021 02:44
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Nestharken posted:The consensus among guys at my martial arts gym is that a trained fighter has a good shot against a large dog or maaaybe a wolf, but anything bigger gets very dicey very quickly. That chart mostly just illustrates how bad the Dunning-Kruger effect is when it comes to fighting. I mean, an *elephant*? i'm just baffled by the 23% of men who think they could defeat a chimpanzee, which is literally just a human being that's about twice as fast and four times as strong as your average dude. it would be like trying to fight batman after he did a shitload of pcp Sagebrush has a new favorite as of 02:52 on May 16, 2021 |
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May 16, 2021 02:48
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some plague rats posted:Somebody doesn't have a cat gently caress off with your doorless toilet. Alternatively, gently caress off with your cat-that-can-open-doors.
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May 16, 2021 02:49
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Sagebrush posted:i'm just baffled by the 23% of men who think they could defeat a chimpanzee, which is literally just a human being that's about twice as fast and four times as strong as your average dude. it would be like trying to fight batman while he's on pcp I’ve seen all the planet of the apes movies (new and old) and I definitely think I could.
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May 16, 2021 02:52
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mind the walrus posted:The forced Boomer energy coming off of this is strong but I'm a serious sucker for 90s squelch noises so I'ma adopt it anyway. The... The forced boomer energy off of a Video Game noise and soundtrack from a game that came out in 2016?
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May 16, 2021 02:55
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Sagebrush posted:i'm just baffled by the 23% of men who think they could defeat a chimpanzee, which is literally just a human being that's about twice as fast and four times as strong as your average dude. it would be like trying to fight batman after he did a shitload of pcp See, I can forgive that because most people don't know how muscle insertions work and just think "it's the size of a child, how hard can it be?" But how could you look at something that's bigger than the average Dark Souls boss and be like "yeah, I got this"?
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May 16, 2021 02:59
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Sagebrush posted:i'm just baffled by the 23% of men who think they could defeat a chimpanzee, which is literally just a human being that's about twice as fast and four times as strong as your average dude. it would be like trying to fight batman after he did a shitload of pcp I think most of them assume that because chimpanzees are smaller it would be an easy fight because they don't know our muscles are different.
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May 16, 2021 03:02
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Nestharken posted:See, I can forgive that because most people don't know how muscle insertions work and just think "it's the size of a child, how hard can it be?" voting third party posted:I think most of them assume that because chimpanzees are smaller it would be an easy fight because they don't know our muscles are different. 
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May 16, 2021 03:03
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Is 23% that unrealistic? Like run the fight 100 times I can buy that maybe 23 humans get a luck punch or grapple or kick in by accident ,or have a weaker chimp and beat the chimp And conversely that 77 chimps will gently caress up the human
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May 16, 2021 03:06
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Jestery posted:Is 23% that unrealistic? 47/15 a chimpanzee just snaps you in half like a piece of celery. And the other 80 times it degloves your face so yeah, those ratios are wildly optimistic.
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May 16, 2021 03:09
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Jestery posted:Is 23% that unrealistic? The chimp will win more than 99 out of 100 times
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May 16, 2021 03:09
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Jestery posted:Is 23% that unrealistic? Yeah I would be hosed if 77 chimps attacked me
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May 16, 2021 03:09
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Fair enough then 
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May 16, 2021 03:10
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Jestery posted:Is 23% that unrealistic? The chimp will bite off your fingers, face, and genitals. If you're lucky, it will be in that order, and by the time it gets to the last one, you will have already lost consciousness.
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May 16, 2021 03:10
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Yeah I'd say 23% is highly unrealistic. Again, a chimpanzee is basically just a human being, with equal fighting ability and reach and reflexes, but several times stronger. Plus he has those gigantic teeth. Yeah you might manage to kick the chimp in the gut or gouge its eyes or something but then it's just really loving mad and it will tear your limbs off like a wookiee and eat your face. In my opinion the human winning 2.3% of the time would be optimistic, even if you only picked strong men.
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May 16, 2021 03:13
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