[SPAM] FW: RE: The logs could do with a courtesy flush

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > [SPAM] FW: RE: The logs could do with a courtesy flush

«‹›501 »

Knormal: Nov 11, 2001

CitizenKain posted:

Got an impressive question in an email today.
"Can we duplicate the display from the TV onto the video conference system's control touchpad? When <C-Level 1> and <C-Level 2> are in a conference call, and sit at one end of the table, they can't read things on the TV very well."

This room has a 85" TV mounted at one end, but these two sit at the very end of a 20ish foot long table. Yea they can't read details on the screen, its far away. I guess we could get an AV installer in and have them put a HDMI splitter and but a TV on a way 1/2 way down..but maybe sit closer? Or I guess we can go find a larger TV, but they'd have to remodel the room again.

# ? Jul 13, 2021 07:41

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 26, 2024 21:39

Arquinsiel: Jun 1, 2006; "There is no such thing as society. There are individual men and women, and there are families. And no government can do anything except through people, and people must look to themselves first."

God Bless Margaret Thatcher
God Bless England
RIP My Iron Lady

mllaneza posted:

Uh, "stiction" is a thing with old fashioned platter drives. The "drop it two inches" thing is a legitimate response to a specific kind of hard drive failure in the pre-SSD world. I've only used it once, but it let the CFO get the quarterly budget report off f a dying drive onto an external. After he put his wife on the phone so I could tell her that he was supposed to drop the thing.

I used to know someone who's best story was kicking a machine to re-seat the CPU as a palliative measure until he could get the machine on the bench to actually fix the issue. I always though that marking a "kick it here' point with a sharpie was a nice touch.

I'm sure I told the story of the box that hung at 42% of a Server 2003 install so many times that I just whacked the top of the case in rage after troubleshooting with Dell support for three days.

# ? Jul 13, 2021 10:52

Wizard of the Deep: Sep 25, 2005; Another productive workday

The best conferences rooms I had meetings in pre-pandemic had huge screens on three out of the four walls, all mirroring each other. Everyone could see what was on the screen, and you could generally keep each other's faces in the general eye-line. These were used more for in-person meetings vs teleconferences, but we still had cameras and Teams support.

Down to brass tacks, it's not an unreasonable request. It just costs money.

# ? Jul 13, 2021 13:13

DelphiAegis: Jun 21, 2010

mllaneza posted:

Uh, "stiction" is a thing with old fashioned platter drives. The "drop it two inches" thing is a legitimate response to a specific kind of hard drive failure in the pre-SSD world. I've only used it once, but it let the CFO get the quarterly budget report off f a dying drive onto an external. After he put his wife on the phone so I could tell her that he was supposed to drop the thing.

I used to know someone who's best story was kicking a machine to re-seat the CPU as a palliative measure until he could get the machine on the bench to actually fix the issue. I always though that marking a "kick it here' point with a sharpie was a nice touch.

Whoops...

# ? Jul 13, 2021 13:23

Winifred Madgers: Feb 12, 2002

mllaneza posted:

Uh, "stiction" is a thing with old fashioned platter drives. The "drop it two inches" thing is a legitimate response to a specific kind of hard drive failure in the pre-SSD world. I've only used it once, but it let the CFO get the quarterly budget report off f a dying drive onto an external. After he put his wife on the phone so I could tell her that he was supposed to drop the thing.

I used to know someone who's best story was kicking a machine to re-seat the CPU as a palliative measure until he could get the machine on the bench to actually fix the issue. I always though that marking a "kick it here' point with a sharpie was a nice touch.

We had an old CRT TV from the '70s when I was growing up, and the blue would sometimes kick out so all you could see was red and green. But there was a spot on the screen just below center where I could open palm slap the glass just right and reliably get the blue going again.

# ? Jul 13, 2021 13:26

Raerlynn: Oct 28, 2007; Sorry I'm late, I'm afraid I got lost on the path of life.

Goblin Craft posted:

We had an old CRT TV from the '70s when I was growing up, and the blue would sometimes kick out so all you could see was red and green. But there was a spot on the screen just below center where I could open palm slap the glass just right and reliably get the blue going again.

There's a video on YouTube somewhere of a veteran network engineer describing installing his first 10g module in a Cisco case, and being afraid of damaging the component. He called his senior over who responded with a straight hadoken to jam the hardware in place. I'll see if I can find the clip later.

Edit: Found it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bSAgQqa49nM&t=289s

Raerlynn fucked around with this message at 13:46 on Jul 13, 2021

# ? Jul 13, 2021 13:43

Internet Explorer: Jun 1, 2005

mllaneza posted:

Uh, "stiction" is a thing with old fashioned platter drives. The "drop it two inches" thing is a legitimate response to a specific kind of hard drive failure in the pre-SSD world. I've only used it once, but it let the CFO get the quarterly budget report off f a dying drive onto an external. After he put his wife on the phone so I could tell her that he was supposed to drop the thing.

I used to know someone who's best story was kicking a machine to re-seat the CPU as a palliative measure until he could get the machine on the bench to actually fix the issue. I always though that marking a "kick it here' point with a sharpie was a nice touch.

Uh, thanks for telling me something I already know. But if you are regularly telling users to pick up and drop a computer, or leaving your server cases off so you can hammer a hard drive, something is very wrong.

Like, did you seriously just think I was unfamiliar with "old fashioned platter drives?"

:actually:

# ? Jul 13, 2021 14:16

A Frosty Witch: Apr 21, 2005; I was just looking at it and I suddenly got this urge to get inside. No, not just an urge - more than that. It was my destiny to be here; in the box.

A first year review is coming in.

I'm meeting with my boss this afternoon for my first year review (that I specifically requested) as a way to spend a while bragging about myself.

In the last year I've facilitated:

Reducing the average age of backlogged tickets from 194 days to 8.
Raising the average customer satisfaction surveys from 3.1 to 4.9 out of 5.
Reducing our client atrophy rate by 85%.
Reducing instances of re-opened tickets almost 100%.
Completely overhauling our documentation and customer onboarding procedures.
Being a goddamn ray of sunshine for every meeting and angry customer, despite an absurd amount of employee churn and running service desk solo for weeks at a time while training new techs.

Give me a raise or become another chapter in my eventual book while I :yotj:

# ? Jul 13, 2021 15:08

mattfl: Aug 27, 2004

larchesdanrew posted:

Give me a raise or become another chapter in my eventual book while I

You will get 3% and be happy about it!

# ? Jul 13, 2021 15:13

The Fool: Oct 16, 2003

larchesdanrew posted:

A first year review is coming in.

I'm meeting with my boss this afternoon for my first year review (that I specifically requested) as a way to spend a while bragging about myself.

In the last year I've facilitated:

Reducing the average age of backlogged tickets from 194 days to 8.

Raising the average customer satisfaction surveys from 3.1 to 4.9 out of 5.

Reducing our client atrophy rate by 85%.

Reducing instances of re-opened tickets almost 100%.

Completely overhauling our documentation and customer onboarding procedures.

Being a goddamn ray of sunshine for every meeting and angry customer, despite an absurd amount of employee churn and running service desk solo for weeks at a time while training new techs.

Give me a raise or become another chapter in my eventual book while I

This is a loving amazing list of accomplishments and you deserve to have all the riches piled on you

# ? Jul 13, 2021 15:23

mllaneza: Apr 28, 2007; Veteran, Bermuda Triangle Expeditionary Force, 1993-1952

Internet Explorer posted:

Uh, thanks for telling me something I already know. But if you are regularly telling users to pick up and drop a computer, or leaving your server cases off so you can hammer a hard drive, something is very wrong.

Like, did you seriously just think I was unfamiliar with "old fashioned platter drives?"

Nothing personal. And that's not a regular technique, I've only done it a handful of times, and that one was the only time it worked.

# ? Jul 13, 2021 15:54

Happiness Commando: Feb 1, 2002; $$ joy at gunpoint $$

larchesdanrew posted:

Give me a raise or become another chapter in my eventual book while I

PMed

# ? Jul 13, 2021 16:01

ssb: Feb 16, 2006; WOULD YOU ACCOMPANY ME ON A BRISK WALK? I WOULD LIKE TO SPEAK WITH YOU!!

mattfl posted:

You will get 3% and be happy about it!

I work for a state university. We're lucky to get 1% every 2-3 years, and there's no budget for merit raises most years. I'd love 3% every year.

# ? Jul 13, 2021 16:04

ChickenOfTomorrow: Nov 11, 2012; god damn it, you've got to be kind

I love reading the notes from the union bargaining sessions at my workplace and I support the union even though I'm not eligible to be part of the bargaining group bc I know my raises will probably follow what they negotiate. this year their initial proposal was 10%, the canny bastards (they won't get it, but aim for the stars, fellow workers).

# ? Jul 13, 2021 16:15

ChickenOfTomorrow: Nov 11, 2012; god damn it, you've got to be kind

what I'm saying is form a union

# ? Jul 13, 2021 16:15

ssb: Feb 16, 2006; WOULD YOU ACCOMPANY ME ON A BRISK WALK? I WOULD LIKE TO SPEAK WITH YOU!!

ChickenOfTomorrow posted:

what I'm saying is form a union

We had one.

https://docs.legis.wisconsin.gov/2011/related/acts/10

# ? Jul 13, 2021 16:16

ChickenOfTomorrow: Nov 11, 2012; god damn it, you've got to be kind

okay now what I'm saying is something something something in minecraft.

sorry

# ? Jul 13, 2021 16:17

ssb: Feb 16, 2006; WOULD YOU ACCOMPANY ME ON A BRISK WALK? I WOULD LIKE TO SPEAK WITH YOU!!

ChickenOfTomorrow posted:

okay now what I'm saying is something something something in minecraft.

sorry

Yeah, it is what it is. It's made up for by an excellent work environment with a great boss. Decent benefits (although those have been heavily gutted in a lot of ways), remote work, and a decent retirement plan make up for it in my book, primarily the first part. I'm generally happy working where I am with who I work with, even if occasionally I'll bitch about something. My boss fights pretty hard for raises for me and I get them whenever they're available, so overall I'm doing alright. Just occasionally will have nothing or a 1% raise for like 3-4 years in a row before getting a significant raise as soon as our department gets raise budget. I'm making way less than I could elsewhere with my skillset and experience, but I'm not willing to risk losing a great and flexible work environment for it.

Plus for various reasons, all my eggs are kind of in one basket with our retirement pension plan.

# ? Jul 13, 2021 16:40

Wizard of the Deep: Sep 25, 2005; Another productive workday

larchesdanrew posted:

A first year review is coming in.

I'm meeting with my boss this afternoon for my first year review (that I specifically requested) as a way to spend a while bragging about myself.

In the last year I've facilitated:

Reducing the average age of backlogged tickets from 194 days to 8.

Raising the average customer satisfaction surveys from 3.1 to 4.9 out of 5.

Reducing our client atrophy rate by 85%.

Reducing instances of re-opened tickets almost 100%.

Completely overhauling our documentation and customer onboarding procedures.

Being a goddamn ray of sunshine for every meeting and angry customer, despite an absurd amount of employee churn and running service desk solo for weeks at a time while training new techs.

Give me a raise or become another chapter in my eventual book while I

These are some amazing numbers. With the standard procedure that the only way to move up is moving out, if they don't give you a serious bump, just throw pretty much that on LinkedIn verbatim. Hard numbers get recruiters and interviewing managers excited.

# ? Jul 13, 2021 17:05

Dr. Arbitrary: Mar 15, 2006; Bleak Gremlin

larchesdanrew posted:

Give me a raise or become another chapter in my eventual book while I

I'd buy a copy:

larchesdanrew posted:

The Chief Engineer is called into the conference room on a Friday afternoon. As he walks through the door, he sees the heads of every department sitting around the large decorative table, eyes locked on him. Sitting between the General Manager and the President is myself, hands clasped on the table in front of me.

"What's all this about?" He asks, a look of concern flashing across his face momentarily.

"Oh, we just wanted you to test our new management tool," I reply.

At this point, he seems to notice the miles of metal tubing, wires, gadgets, gizmos, and gewgaws suspended from the walls and ceiling. I motion to a single red button in the center of the table.

"If you would, please press that button," I request.

He balks at this. The President and General Manager stare sternly at him. Eventually, he concedes and pushes the button. Nothing happens for a few seconds and I feel a slight panic rising. Suddenly, though, a clockwork whirring begins, and a single metal ball bearing begins it's journey along the maze of piping. All eyes dart around the room watching the ball as it travels from pipe to pipe, clinking and clanking its way to its inevitable goal. The room-sized Rube Goldberg monstrosity carries on its task, becoming increasingly more complex. No one talks; no one moves. Every person's attention is transfixed on the small bearing.

Half an hour has passed since the Chief Engineer pushed the button. The ball is still pinging and clinking through the obstacles ahead of it. Suddenly, it drops into a small cup suspended from pullies, the weight of the bearing pulling the cup down. A hidden network of painstakingly interconnected pullies begins to pull taut, and the final phase of this machine has commenced.

I am lifted from my seat, the wires attached to my body cleverly hidden beyond the curtains behind me. At an agonizingly slow pace, I float above the table and am carried towards the Chief Engineer. As I make my way towards him, a piece of paper lowers from the ceiling and suspends itself right in front of his face. Written on the paper are two words: You're Fired.

"Fired," he exclaims incredulously, "what am I being fired for?"

At this point, my journey has ended. I am now floating with my face mere centimeters from the Chief Engineer's face. I close the distance and put my lips right next to his ears.

"That's really none of your business," I whisper, "You just let me handle this."

His chair then catapults him through the window and I am crowned the new Chief Engineer. After the applause dies down, with all hands thoroughly shaken and backs sufficiently patted, I stand to make my grand acceptance speech.

"I just want to take this opportunity to say something I've wanted to say for a long time now." All eyes are staring at me intently, hanging on the wisdom I am about to impart.

"Y'all suck a lot. I'm out of here. Peace."

I take my leave. The room is filled with the sounds of defeated sobbing.

I spend the next three years trying to find employment and eventually die from accidentally inhaling too much canned air.

The end.

# ? Jul 13, 2021 17:44

ConfusedUs: Feb 24, 2004; Bees?
You want fucking bees?
Here you go!
ROLL INITIATIVE!!

I'd forgotten that. Perfection.

# ? Jul 13, 2021 17:50

CitizenKain: May 27, 2001; That was Gary Cooper, asshole.; Nap Ghost

Wizard of the Deep posted:

The best conferences rooms I had meetings in pre-pandemic had huge screens on three out of the four walls, all mirroring each other. Everyone could see what was on the screen, and you could generally keep each other's faces in the general eye-line. These were used more for in-person meetings vs teleconferences, but we still had cameras and Teams support.

Down to brass tacks, it's not an unreasonable request. It just costs money.

2 walls in this room are floor to ceiling windows. One wall has the TV, last well only has a little space, guess I could get someone into split a hdmi signal over there.

Individual tablet idea isn�t terrible, but people will turn these from �this tablet helps me read the the display� to �I want to run everything off this.�

Or they could sit closer.

# ? Jul 13, 2021 18:09

RFC2324: Jun 7, 2012; http 418

Individual tablets with cameras all dialed into zoom

# ? Jul 13, 2021 18:20

The Fool: Oct 16, 2003

RFC2324 posted:

Individual tablets with cameras all dialed into zoom

I mean, if you mute the tablets and have good room audio this isn�t a terrible idea

# ? Jul 13, 2021 18:24

RFC2324: Jun 7, 2012; http 418

The Fool posted:

I mean, if you mute the tablets and have good room audio this isn’t a terrible idea

At that point why doesn't everyone just stay home?

# ? Jul 13, 2021 18:27

PremiumSupport: Aug 17, 2015

mllaneza posted:

Uh, "stiction" is a thing with old fashioned platter drives. The "drop it two inches" thing is a legitimate response to a specific kind of hard drive failure in the pre-SSD world. I've only used it once, but it let the CFO get the quarterly budget report off f a dying drive onto an external. After he put his wife on the phone so I could tell her that he was supposed to drop the thing.

I used to know someone who's best story was kicking a machine to re-seat the CPU as a palliative measure until he could get the machine on the bench to actually fix the issue. I always though that marking a "kick it here' point with a sharpie was a nice touch.

In the very early 2000's when we were in college I gave a friend of mine an old 13G HDD that I wasn't using. He spent several hours trying to make it mount in his new system build. Finally at around 2 in the morning he chucked the HDD into the wall across the room in a fit of pure frustration.

The next morning he picked it up, stuck it in the machine and it mounted instantly. drat thing still worked perfectly years later.

# ? Jul 13, 2021 18:28

The Fool: Oct 16, 2003

RFC2324 posted:

At that point why doesn't everyone just stay home?

Gotta have that office culture

# ? Jul 13, 2021 18:29

The Fool: Oct 16, 2003

The Fool posted:

Gotta have that office culture

By �office culture� I mean �there is some combination of hating families and wanting to lord power over our underlings so everyone has to be on the office regardless of their preference or productivity�

# ? Jul 13, 2021 18:31

CitizenKain: May 27, 2001; That was Gary Cooper, asshole.; Nap Ghost

RFC2324 posted:

Individual tablets with cameras all dialed into zoom

This building has 6 rooms with video conference equipment, but this is the board room and they have to look important sitting at that one end.

# ? Jul 13, 2021 22:19

GreenNight: Feb 19, 2006; Turning the light on the darkest places, you and I know we got to face this now. We got to face this now.

Put a big TV on a wheeled cart and move it closer.

https://www.amazon.com/Black-Wheels-Plasma-Panel-Stand/dp/B07FXMX241/ref=sr_1_8?dchild=1&keywords=tv+cart&qid=1626211219&sr=8-8

We got one of those for our conference rooms.

# ? Jul 13, 2021 22:20

CitizenKain: May 27, 2001; That was Gary Cooper, asshole.; Nap Ghost

GreenNight posted:

Put a big TV on a wheeled cart and move it closer.

https://www.amazon.com/Black-Wheels-Plasma-Panel-Stand/dp/B07FXMX241/ref=sr_1_8?dchild=1&keywords=tv+cart&qid=1626211219&sr=8-8

We got one of those for our conference rooms.

I use things like that for some places, this one is just people being dumb and ignoring sitting closer or bringing in a laptop.

# ? Jul 13, 2021 22:46

A Frosty Witch: Apr 21, 2005; I was just looking at it and I suddenly got this urge to get inside. No, not just an urge - more than that. It was my destiny to be here; in the box.

larchesdanrew posted:

Give me a raise or become another chapter in my eventual book while I

A raise came in.

My first raise ever :unsmith:

# ? Jul 13, 2021 23:08

Nth Doctor: Sep 7, 2010; Darkrai used Dream Eater!
It's super effective!

larchesdanrew posted:

A raise came in.

My first raise ever

I'm really happy for you!

# ? Jul 13, 2021 23:34

Wizard of the Deep: Sep 25, 2005; Another productive workday

larchesdanrew posted:

A raise came in.

My first raise ever

Congrats, and well-deserved!

# ? Jul 13, 2021 23:41

Darchangel: Feb 12, 2009; Tell him about the blower!

CitizenKain posted:

Got an impressive question in an email today.
"Can we duplicate the display from the TV onto the video conference system's control touchpad? When <C-Level 1> and <C-Level 2> are in a conference call, and sit at one end of the table, they can't read things on the TV very well."

This room has a 85" TV mounted at one end, but these two sit at the very end of a 20ish foot long table. Yea they can't read details on the screen, its far away. I guess we could get an AV installer in and have them put a HDMI splitter and but a TV on a way 1/2 way down..but maybe sit closer? Or I guess we can go find a larger TV, but they'd have to remodel the room again.

When they remodeled our boardroom, they got around this potential issue by spending a poo poo-ton of money for individual 20" displays that rise out of the table in front of every seat. In addition to the 120" TV. Yep.

larchesdanrew posted:

A raise came in.

My first raise ever

Congrats!

# ? Jul 14, 2021 00:06

vanity slug: Jul 20, 2010

Our conference room tables have screens inside the table underneath the glass. It looks cool and nobody ever uses it.

# ? Jul 14, 2021 00:30

Weatherman: Jul 30, 2003; WARBLEKLONK

Already beaten, but

larchesdanrew posted:

A first year review is coming in.

I'm meeting with my boss this afternoon for my first year review (that I specifically requested) as a way to spend a while bragging about myself.

In the last year I've facilitated:

Reducing the average age of backlogged tickets from 194 days to 8.

Raising the average customer satisfaction surveys from 3.1 to 4.9 out of 5.

Reducing our client atrophy rate by 85%.

Reducing instances of re-opened tickets almost 100%.

Completely overhauling our documentation and customer onboarding procedures.

Being a goddamn ray of sunshine for every meeting and angry customer, despite an absurd amount of employee churn and running service desk solo for weeks at a time while training new techs.

"Meets expectations"

# ? Jul 14, 2021 03:02

A Frosty Witch: Apr 21, 2005; I was just looking at it and I suddenly got this urge to get inside. No, not just an urge - more than that. It was my destiny to be here; in the box.

Weatherman posted:

Already beaten, but

"Meets expectations"

Basically this. I think there was one compliment that entire meeting and the raise ended up being what I had originally asked for when I accepted the position.

I've been up working since 2am. It's now 8:30 and I'm still helping users troubleshoot remote home connections.

This is the first week they have agreed to offer on-call compensation.

Every job is a toxic nightmare.

# ? Jul 14, 2021 03:33

Internet Explorer: Jun 1, 2005

You mentioned it was your first raise ever. If you don't mind me asking, what % was it? It's a very hot market and if you've got that experience under your belt, I echo the earlier comment that you could probably jump ship and make a lot more.

# ? Jul 14, 2021 03:37

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 26, 2024 21:39

A Frosty Witch: Apr 21, 2005; I was just looking at it and I suddenly got this urge to get inside. No, not just an urge - more than that. It was my destiny to be here; in the box.

Internet Explorer posted:

You mentioned it was your first raise ever. If you don't mind me asking, what % was it? It's a very hot market and if you've got that experience under your belt, I echo the earlier comment that you could probably jump ship and make a lot more.

I calculated it out to be like 7.78% or something. Not amazing, but it's hard to internalize since I'm already making almost twice what I made at my previous job.

I'm nestling down in the well again, it seems.

# ? Jul 14, 2021 04:06

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > [SPAM] FW: RE: The logs could do with a courtesy flush

«‹›501 »