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Jim and Angela come into the office and are excited to make an announcement: they're pregnant. Pam is happy for them, but Jim is not there. She doesn't know where he is. He went out last night and hasn't come back. He's not answering his phone. Jim is just loving gone. After a few months he's assumed dead. They have a funeral. Angela starts to go into labor and the doctor says they'll need to do a C-section. They cut her open and who should flop out but Jim, covered in amniotic fluid he smirks and says "Hi buddy, miss me?" to Dwight. Then he starts nursing on Angela. Dwight believes in natural breastfeeding until the age of seven so there's nothing he can object to here.
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Aug 5, 2021 19:21
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| # ? May 31, 2024 22:49 |
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Jim runs over Dwight in a freak accident, killing him instantly. Dwight awakens as a slime in a fantasy anime world.
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Aug 6, 2021 00:55
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Sherry Bahm posted:Jim runs over Dwight in a freak accident, killing him instantly. Jim gets reincarnated as a spider and eats him.
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Aug 6, 2021 01:03
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John Wick of Dogs posted:Jim and Angela come into the office and are excited to make an announcement: they're pregnant.
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Aug 6, 2021 01:05
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Applewhite posted:Jim gets reincarnated as a spider and eats him. After he got run over by Michael.
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Aug 6, 2021 02:43
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Dwight wakes up with his head sewn to Jim’s right shoulder. “Looks like we’re going to be spending a lot more time together, buddy!” says Jim.
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Aug 6, 2021 12:47
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Jim shares a video on his phone of Dwight and him having sex with the entire office in an attempt to embarrass Dwight. The whole office agrees - that's not Dwight. Jim snatches his phone back. It's not Dwight! Who is that?
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Aug 6, 2021 12:55
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Jim starts calling Dwight “balloon boy.” Balloon Boy starts to forget his old name. Someone else at the office calls him “Dwight” and he gets a headache and starts to cry.
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Aug 6, 2021 13:09
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Jim buys all the tickets to Dwight's karate tournament so nobody shows up to watch
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Aug 6, 2021 13:17
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12,000 standard years on, and what remains of the Dwight Lord's conscious controls the several small cities and astral trading ports on the desert planet Dunder Mif. Though a relative backwater by 'modern' standards, Dunder Mif still retains a certain pride of place in its corner of the DwightSphere as a local hub of commerce. Today, however, today is going to propel it to the forefront in the minds of every sentient being in the galaxy, you see, as its vast, previously unmoving sands now quiver like a stapler covered in Jello. He, or rather, IT has come Yob Noollab
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Aug 6, 2021 13:42
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Funky See Funky Do posted:Jim shares a video on his phone of Dwight and him having sex with the entire office in an attempt to embarrass Dwight. The whole office agrees - that's not Dwight. Jim snatches his phone back. It's not Dwight! Who is that? Very happy that isn't my avatar anymore
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Aug 6, 2021 14:02
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Dunder Mifflin announces the Dunder-lympics, a summer event pitting the various branches against each other in various physical and mental challenges. Michael puts Dwight in charge of training everyone in the office, and Dwight excels in the role. The most shocking transformation is Kevin, who begs Dwight to let him be a gymnast. Although Angela and Oscar initially laugh at their fellow accountant's plan, they are overjoyed to see him lose over 75 lbs and are blown away by his parallel bars routine. The only concern is Jim, who is supposed to compete in wrestling. Dwight continually stresses that it's not professional wrestling, and Jim says he knows. Jim also adds that "It's like what those Greek guys did, the ones I buried under the volcano." Dwight just sadly nods and assumes they're going to lose that event. The week-long Dunder-lympics begin and Scranton easily takes the lead in the first few events. Kevin's routine gets a standing ovation, Meredith dominates in powerlifting, and Michael is a delight in the figure skating competition. Then comes the wrestling event. And, shockingly, everything seems fine at first. Jim is wearing a wrestling singlet, has no weapons, and doesn't appear to be strutting around to his own imaginary theme music. And the match goes off without a hitch, as Jim defeats Mark, the manager of the Nashua branch. Dwight cautiously stands and claps for Jim. Then the music starts, Enter Sandman by Metallica, and former ECW wrestler the Sandman attacks Jim from behind with a kendo stick. Jim and the Sandman start fighting through the entire building, putting each other through tables and smashing each other in the head with chairs and any other weapon they can find. Jim eventually tosses the Sandman in a garbage can and kicks him down a flight of stairs while saying "Time to take out the trash, Sandy." Jim slowly walks back towards the wrestling mat, at which point he's kicked in the face by Rob Van Dam. RVD and Jim also have a massive hardcore brawl through the building. The Sandman eventually wakes back up and starts brawling with both of them. Jim is thrown through a window and gets back up, bleeding from his forehead, and attacks both professional wrestlers with a 2x4. As all this is going on, a member of Dunder Mifflin corporate asks Dwight if this happens a lot. Dwight wearily nods and the other worker explains that they have a guy like that in corporate, too. The two men trade stories of their pranksters as Jim tosses RVD off a 2nd story balcony and then performs a diving 450 splash onto the unconscious man.
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Aug 6, 2021 15:02
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Jim comes to work dressed as a Minion for Halloween and repeatedly asks Michael what he thinks of it.
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Aug 6, 2021 15:05
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Dwight applies for a new job at Dunder Mifflin and is excited to hear back from HR that an interview has been scheduled. Dwight drives to the corporate office, excited to explain why he's the best choice of Junior International Mediator. Dwight will act as assistant to the International Mediator, who handles any disputes on international paper shipments. Dwight makes it to the front desk and explains that he's there for the interview, but the receptionist just looks at him, perplexed. She explains that there's no job by that title, and there are no interviews currently scheduled for any open positions. Dwight pulls up the job posting and the receptionist notes, sadly, that it's obviously fake as the website it's hosted on is "dunder-miffIin.com", with a captial "i" replacing the lowercase "l". Dwight apologizes for wasting her time and begins the long drive back to Scranton, already aware of who did this. When Dwight starts his engine, Jim pops up from his back seat and wraps a length of saran wrap around his nose and throat. "What's the matter, Dwight, did you choke on your interview?" laughs Jim as Dwight loses consciousness.
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Aug 6, 2021 15:14
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Jim replaces Dwight’s desk with a carnivorous mimic.
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Aug 6, 2021 16:07
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Jim gets sucked off by the mimic
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Aug 6, 2021 16:12
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Jim hides razors in his Halloween candy, causing panic across Scranton as children are injured and parents are terrified. Jim goes on the news and says that his own children were injured, and the only place they got candy was from Schrute Farms. Cece and Phillip show their bloody mouths for the camera and Jim mugs for a moment, then catches himself and looks sad. The people of Scranton burn down Schrute Farms with Dwight trapped in his barn (he was preparing treat bags for children in the hospital), killing him and destroying his property. Several years later, a teenage Phillip complains to his Dad about the fact that he can't sleep. Jim, who hates being a father, calls him a "Dumbshit little brat" and takes another swig from a jar of maple syrup. That night, Jim is awoken by Phillip's screams and, angry about being bothered, barges into his son's room. As he does, he sees Phillip being tossed around the room as if by some invisible force. Jim tells him to calm down and shut up, but Phillip begs for help. Phillip is finally tossed through his closet door, where he's impaled by a sword that Jim had stuck there "just for fun" the other day. Before Phillip passes he says that a man attacked him in his dreams, a man in a mustard yellow shirt. Jim is enraged that Dwight has become a vengeful spirit and curses himself for getting too ambitious with his candy prank. ' A Fancy Hat fucked around with this message at 17:03 on Aug 6, 2021 |
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Aug 6, 2021 16:59
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Michael invites everyone to bring their favorite movie into the office for a movie day. Jim brings in the film "Mars Needs Moms" and insists that it plays first. Everyone else is disturbed by the film, but Jim is staring at the screen, completely enraptured by the movie. At the end of the movie Jim is crying and says the movie continues to be the most beautiful thing he's ever seen. He then gets irritated when the next film, "Back to the Future", is selected. Jim smashes the DVD and shoves "Mars Needs Moms" back in the DVD player. Dwight leans over to Pam to ask if Jim watches this at home, only to recoil in horror when he sees that Pam is now dressed like Ki, from the movie. Jim looks over and makes an exaggerated "AWOOGAH!" sound effect while his eyeballs pop out of his, expand to the size of basketballs, zoom around the zoom ,then shrink back down and pop into Jim's skull. Everyone is screaming now except for Pam and Jim. Pam is crying in her awkward costume while Jim is strutting around the room knocking over chairs with his massive erection. Dwight escapes from the conference room only to discover that the room has been transported to Mars, and he instantly dies upon leaving the room. Jim erotically mugs for the camera.
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Aug 6, 2021 18:29
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Jim sucks all the ink out of Dwight's pen.
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Aug 6, 2021 18:38
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Jim turns himself into a pen and secretly hides himself on Dwight's desk. When Dwight tries writing with the Jim-pen, it (he?) will only write "DWIGHT POOP".
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Aug 6, 2021 18:40
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Jim legally changes his name to "No Don't" to annoy Dwight.
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Aug 6, 2021 18:45
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Jim legally changes his name to Dwight and starts calling himself "balloon boy"
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Aug 6, 2021 21:11
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Michael invites everyone to bring their favorite movie into the office for a movie day. Jim brings in the film "Mars Needs Moms" and insists that it plays first. When Dwight sits in his chair, he feels a sharp pain. Looking down, he sees a syringe sticking up out of the chair, and a note from Jim saying that he’s now been infected.
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Aug 7, 2021 00:40
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Jim starts calling Dwight in the middle of the night every night to describe the dream Dwight was just having. Dwight doesn’t know how Jim is doing this but he knows his dreams are becoming darker and more disturbing with each successive slumber.
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Aug 7, 2021 01:06
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Jim starts calling Dwight late to dinner.
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Aug 7, 2021 01:21
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Jim pranks Dwight by putting his stapler in Jell-O. Again. Jim is suffering from severe depression.
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Aug 7, 2021 01:24
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Jim starts calling Dwight “bolognese baisse”. Dwight slowly turns into a meat sauce reduction. Jim approaches Dwight’s desk with a fork, and begins to eat.
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Aug 7, 2021 01:32
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Jim strangles Andy to death and frames Dwight. Jim is pissed when thier coworkers thank Dwight and hail him as a hero for doing what none of them had the guts to do. When Jim tries to reveal his prank Darryl gives him a hard left hook him for trying to take the credit.
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Aug 7, 2021 01:35
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drat you, Radium
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Aug 7, 2021 01:37
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It's 9:30am on Tuesday, which means Jim cracks open an ice cold coors light, the only beer brewed, filtered, and packaged as cold as the rockies. Dwight stares daggers at Jim and stands up to proclaim "am I the only one in this office who notices that Jim has a severe alcohol dependency problem?" Jim suddenly rises and delivers a perfect Stone Cold Stunner to Dwight, who lands on the ground and flops like a fish because of the brain injury he just sustained. Jim shakes the rest of his beer and sprays it all over Dwight's body and flips him the bird and yells "...AND THAT'S THE BOTTOM LINE BECAUSE STONE COLD SAID SO"
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Aug 7, 2021 01:43
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After learning that Dwight is allergic to shellfish, Jim transforms him into a giant, screaming shrimp. As Dwight withers on the floor begging for death Jim mugs at the camera.
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Aug 7, 2021 02:02
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After Dwight calls him stupid, Jim quits Dunder Mifflin and goes to medical school. Nine years and two residencies later Dr. Jim gives Dwight a wedgie.
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Aug 7, 2021 02:03
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Jim puts Dwight's stapler in Jell-O pudding.
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Aug 7, 2021 02:12
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Jim gets massive breast implants in an attempt to seduce Dwight.
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Aug 7, 2021 02:30
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Jim pushes himself down the stairs but makes it look like Dwight did it. Dwight goes to prison for eight years because Jim also planted heroin in Dwight's car.
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Aug 7, 2021 03:49
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Sherry Bahm posted:Jim puts Dwight's stapler in Jell-O pudding.   
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Aug 7, 2021 04:44
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Jim places an airbag in the cushions of Dwight's chair and switches his phone's ringtone to play "Loving You" to trigger the device when the high notes are hit in the song. Jim begins dialing as soon as Dwight is seated. Unfortunately the Chinese knock off phone cannot hit the high notes despite Jim's repeated calls. The cacophony of annoying sounds trigger Pam's PMS and she kills Dwight with her keyboard...
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Aug 7, 2021 05:04
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찌므 할플은 한극어만 합니다 드와이프 혼란스러워이다
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Aug 7, 2021 05:07
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Jim self-immolates in the middle of the office floor. Dwight isn’t sure if this is an allusion to Tibet, but the thought is enough to trigger Dwight to donate a few dollars to Doctors Without Borders. Jim, in his final excruciating seconds, mugs the camera. He knew Dwight would donate that money and skip buying an afternoon coffee to make up for it. Jim smugly enjoys the idea that Dwight will be a little tired later today as he expires.
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Aug 7, 2021 08:06
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| # ? May 31, 2024 22:49 |
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Who What Now posted:drat you, Radium jim removes the load-bearing slurs from the code of dwight's favorite forum, causing it to crash and go offline.
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Aug 7, 2021 08:08
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