Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Post
  • Reply
Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012

BREADS

He’s mad about the vaccine mandate*.

*That has holes so large that a non-certified forklift driver could take a load through.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

PhazonLink
Jul 17, 2010

Mr. Nice! posted:

Not the academies. It isn’t easy to get into one of them unless you’re a stud candidate or well connected.

wait so is he chicken hawk that is trying to semi stolen valor, military school?

Propaganda Hour
Aug 25, 2008



after editing wikipedia as a joke for 16 years, i ve convinced myself that homer simpson's japanese name translates to the "The beer goblin"

Mimesweeper posted:

wait did that really happen

Hollywood re-enactment https://youtu.be/Hj3zkazLvbk

Cat Hatter
Oct 24, 2006

Hatters gonna hat.

Cojawfee posted:

Ironic, considering if he had followed proper safety procedures and didn't have his feet on the dashboard when the SUV he was in crashed, he might not have been paralyzed.

In my hometown there is a real-estate guy who was paralyzed when he hit a wave in a speedboat in a way that he bounced out of his seat and came down spine first on a seatback. He later went on to name a street after the brand of speedboat he'd been driving in the accident.

Son of Thunderbeast
Sep 21, 2002
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46eKJDFmVHg

Kith
Sep 17, 2009

You never learn anything
by doing it right.


https://i.imgur.com/AtANK9j.mp4

Karate Bastard
Jul 31, 2007

Soiled Meat

Bigclive says don't count on it :) some of them are actually glass and will cut you if you try it

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=H09SI5qLmtY

No cutting anybody in this vid though, just teachable stuff.

Humphreys
Jan 26, 2013

We conceived a way to use my mother as a porn mule


Next up on Truck Driver hiring adventures:

Preliminary interview seems all good, says has completely clean driving history. We run his info while the interview is going on. 7 major infringements in the last year. We require zero in 5 years. Didn't bother with the criminal history check.

Cartoon Man
Jan 31, 2004


When you’re at the drive through window, put your car in park, or die.

https://www.bellinghamherald.com/news/nation-world/world/article254107763.html

Vlaphor
Dec 18, 2005

Lipstick Apathy
Sound recommended.

https://va.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_qz6f8qbwxC1w5pr9j.mp4

B-Rock452
Jan 6, 2005
:justflu:

Cojawfee posted:

That's what his wikipedia article says. He was riding in an SUV with his feet on the dashboard and the person driving fell asleep and crashed into a concrete barrier. In true entitled douche fashion, he claimed that being paralyzed in that crash is why he couldn't go to the naval academy, even though he was rejected before the crash.

He has also said the friend driving ran off and left him but the friend actually pulled him from the wreckage and called for help.

Spatule
Mar 18, 2003

Cartoon Man posted:

When you’re at the drive through window, put your car in park, or die.

https://www.bellinghamherald.com/news/nation-world/world/article254107763.html

Constable Tania Visintin said the driver “tragically” died at the scene.

I wonder if Constable Visintin did air quotes when saying "tragically".

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005

bone shaking.
soul baking.

PhazonLink posted:

wait so is he chicken hawk that is trying to semi stolen valor, military school?

Pretty much.

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005

bone shaking.
soul baking.
He totally would have enlisted in the marines after getting denied the academy spot!

Pigsfeet on Rye
Oct 22, 2008

I'm meat on the hoof

A modern day John Henry, in the heat of competition against a machine

CRUSTY MINGE
Mar 30, 2011

Peggy Hill
Foot Connoisseur

PhazonLink posted:

wait so is he chicken hawk that is trying to semi stolen valor, military school?

Chickenhawk is such a great term. I used it on an uncle once, and he's since shut the gently caress up anything related to the military with me. I enlisted and went to Iraq in my early 20s, he racked up half a dozen DUIs during his.

Don't forget the guy Tammy Duckworth parked herself on during a congressional hearing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJtD8hPUTcU

HelloIAmYourHeart
Dec 29, 2008
Fallen Rib
drat, she took him down for his "twisted ankle" without even making reference to the fact that she's a double amputee.

CRUSTY MINGE
Mar 30, 2011

Peggy Hill
Foot Connoisseur
Tammy rules. I wouldn't move back to Illinois to be her constituent, but I really hope I get to meet her someday.

Incoming Chinchilla
Apr 2, 2010

CRUSTY MINGE posted:

Chickenhawk is such a great term. I used it on an uncle once, and he's since shut the gently caress up anything related to the military with me. I enlisted and went to Iraq in my early 20s, he racked up half a dozen DUIs during his.

Don't forget the guy Tammy Duckworth parked herself on during a congressional hearing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJtD8hPUTcU

Apparently this guy is in prison for murdering his wife. So all around just a stand up guy.

https://www.nbcwashington.com/news/local/loudoun-county-braulio-castillo-life-in-prison-murder-of-wife-michelle-castillo/2010003/

Vincent Van Goatse
Nov 8, 2006

Enjoy every sandwich.

Smellrose

And here I was thinking "how could this sack of poo poo possibly be worse?" after watching that Tammy Duckworth video.

CRUSTY MINGE
Mar 30, 2011

Peggy Hill
Foot Connoisseur
I hope he's some veterans' bitch in there. A vet who's been given a rundown on the guy by the guards.

punishedkissinger
Sep 20, 2017

CRUSTY MINGE posted:

I hope he's some veterans' bitch in there. A vet who's been given a rundown on the guy by the guards.

that's a pretty hosed up sentiment tbh

imo prison should not be a place for sex torture

CRUSTY MINGE
Mar 30, 2011

Peggy Hill
Foot Connoisseur

punishedkissinger posted:

that's a pretty hosed up sentiment tbh

imo prison should not be a place for sex torture

Well, it's not like there are staffed bordellos in prisons.

And I'd be fine with a guy who warcrimed his way through deployments and probably got busted for something dumb like moving weed, or something serious like spousal abuse, having stolen valor business man hole to take out his frustrations on.

Lots of vets in prison. Let's send them all someone to snuggle up with, starting with corporate whores.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

Archduke Frantz Fanon
Sep 7, 2004


whats funny is that all these trucks are probably ratrunning to avoid traffic on the interstate

which is why this articles conclusion that the bridge should be raised is stupid, because there is no reason a truck needs to be on that stretch of the road

D34THROW
Jan 29, 2012

RETAIL RETAIL LISTEN TO ME BITCH ABOUT RETAIL
:rant:

:stonk: I can't stop even though it makes me want to poo poo my pants.

LifeSunDeath
Jan 4, 2007

still gay rights and smoke weed every day
Linus using a cutting wheel...feels osha, but not sure

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=05K5glVCwis

LifeSunDeath
Jan 4, 2007

still gay rights and smoke weed every day

Holy loving poo poo, first degree murder and only got 16 years

quote:

Castillo, of Ashburn, was convicted in June of killing his wife, Michelle Castillo, in 2014. He was found guilty of breaking into her home, suffocating her and then hanging her body in a shower to make it look like she killed herself.

DandyLion
Jun 24, 2010
disrespectul Deciever

LifeSunDeath posted:

Holy loving poo poo, first degree murder and only got 16 years

c'mon man, why you gotta be hatin on wounded vets

Pigsfeet on Rye
Oct 22, 2008

I'm meat on the hoof

LifeSunDeath posted:

Holy loving poo poo, first degree murder and only got 16 years

What?

"Loudoun County CEO Gets Life in Prison, Plus 16 Years, for Murder of Wife"

LifeSunDeath
Jan 4, 2007

still gay rights and smoke weed every day

Pigsfeet on Rye posted:

What?

"Loudoun County CEO Gets Life in Prison, Plus 16 Years, for Murder of Wife"

I cannot read, that's the real crime here.

Kitfox88
Aug 21, 2007

Anybody lose their glasses?

LifeSunDeath posted:

I cannot read, that's the real crime here.

The lack of support to help you reach literacy in an age of plenty is the real crime :ussr:

Pigsfeet on Rye
Oct 22, 2008

I'm meat on the hoof

Kitfox88 posted:

The lack of support to help you reach literacy in an age of plenty is the real crime :ussr:

Both illiteracy and aliteracy really appall me.

Ola
Jul 19, 2004

Pigsfeet on Rye posted:

Both illiteracy and aliteracy really appall me.

What's so appalling, awful and atrocious about alliteration?

DandyLion
Jun 24, 2010
disrespectul Deciever

Ola posted:

What's so appalling, awful and atrocious about alliteration?

The problem with aliteracy is that one can inadvertently stumble upon something aliteracy and never know it.

Karate Bastard
Jul 31, 2007

Soiled Meat

Ola posted:

What's so appalling, awful and atrocious about alliteration?

Alt-literacy.

Cojawfee
May 31, 2006
I think the US is dumb for not using Celsius
I have alternative literacy.

Buttchocks
Oct 21, 2020

No, I like my hat, thanks.

Pigsfeet on Rye posted:

What?

"Loudoun County CEO Gets Life in Prison, Plus 16 Years, for Murder of Wife"

Not sure whether I'd want a cellmate who had been dead for 15 years. At least they wouldn't snore.

EvenWorseOpinions
Jun 10, 2017

Cojawfee posted:

Ironic, considering if he had followed proper safety procedures and didn't have his feet on the dashboard when the SUV he was in crashed, he might not have been paralyzed.

Yeah, I don't think he has a leg to stand on here

Nenonen
Oct 22, 2009

Mulla on aina kolkyt donaa taskussa

Buttchocks posted:

Not sure whether I'd want a cellmate who had been dead for 15 years. At least they wouldn't snore.

I think I'd prefer a cellmate who's been dead for 15 years, over one that's been dead for a few weeks. The stink should go away as the body decomposes and you can craft shanks from the bones.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Karate Bastard
Jul 31, 2007

Soiled Meat
Isn't that how they make prison wine?

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply