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Josherino)
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StashAugustine posted:does playing guitar make you more or less tedious I'm biased here (I teach guitar) but guitar can be fun as gently caress. If you go into it knowing that the beginning is the hardest part and it will test your patience, you can do an incredible amount even just learning the basics. It's a great way to challenge yourself, express yourself, and just escape. Heck, even if you don't learn solid guitar, at least take some time to play some air guitar, it's good for the soul.
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Sep 14, 2021 02:35
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StashAugustine posted:does playing guitar make you more or less tedious I am insecure with my music, but people tell me they think playing an instrument is a cool skill. For me it has been the second-best thing to a therapist -- the more you practice, the better you can find/know yourself with it, and then share it. Granted, the last part can end up being a practice in and of itself too haha. Anyway to answer your question: I think it can help you feel more like a human
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Sep 14, 2021 02:50
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Jorge Bell posted:When I get really angry about the state of the world I remind myself that I am a poor person of questionable mental health and shouldn't hold myself accountable for America. That's not to say I'm not right about everything but it helps the feeling that I'm somehow making things worse or not helping enough. Me too but I am still bitter about not being allowed to have a chance, ya know.
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Sep 14, 2021 05:02
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ricecult posted:I'm biased here (I teach guitar) but guitar can be fun as gently caress. If you go into it knowing that the beginning is the hardest part and it will test your patience, you can do an incredible amount even just learning the basics. It's a great way to challenge yourself, express yourself, and just escape. Heck, even if you don't learn solid guitar, at least take some time to play some air guitar, it's good for the soul. So I have this problem that I'm not great at reading my body's emotional cues to the point that I'm frequently oblivious about my emotional state. Not a covid thing, just a persistent thing that I and at least a few others have noticed. The stress from covid makes it worse but I don't think it's new. Do you think that having an emotional outlet would help for that? I'd really love to have an emotional outlet and maybe a kind of bridge from my mind to my body to get better in touch with my emotions and feel more present in my body if that makes sense. Also I'd like to express my emotions in a healthy way rather than just randomly becoming sad and staying up until seven in the morning while I process it. Again. If I can address any of these problems I'd be interested in music. I'm also interested in a beginner's acoustic guitar on a budget. Do you have any suggestions?
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Sep 14, 2021 07:03
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Ice Phisherman posted:So I have this problem that I'm not great at reading my body's emotional cues to the point that I'm frequently oblivious about my emotional state. Not a covid thing, just a persistent thing that I and at least a few others have noticed. The stress from covid makes it worse but I don't think it's new. Absolutely can relate to that, and I think guitar/music can absolutely be a part of becoming aware/connected to the body and emotions. I think it takes other work too, I've always played music and also always struggled with my emotions, so yeah, therapy, yoga, exercise, diet, whatever combination that works for you, will be important in addition. As for a starter acoustic, try picking some up! Even if you know nothing, the right guitar will feel right regardless. There are more resources I can dig up a little later....
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Sep 14, 2021 10:16
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I'm really enjoying music chat. I took lessons for the piano and saxophone as a kid. Right now, I have a nice guitar and an old casio keyboard available to play. After some googling, I found these articles: https://spinditty.com/learning/Guitar-vs-Piano-Difficulty-Difference-and-How-to-Choose https://spinditty.com/learning/Best-Musical-Instruments-for-Beginners The guitar sounds far more accessible than I thought. I really liked the breakdown of the piano vs. guitar as it relates to your understanding of music. The author was pushed into piano lessons as a kid (just like me), and didn't really fall in love with playing until they tried the guitar. I've been sharing more of my favorite music on facebook, and I ended up finding a youtube channel where a guy who describes himself as a "classical composer" listens to music and shares his takes on it. It made me realize that there are all kinds of way to experience music. I have a tendency to be hard on myself for picking up an interest and dropping it completely soon after, and I didn't want to put myself through that with playing an instrument. Now I'm thinking that the process of learning how to play music may allow me to appreciate the music I enjoy in entirely new ways. I'm going to mess around with the guitar and keyboard, focusing on the guitar. If I don't stick with it, that's okay. The C-SPAM mental health thread in the not too distant future: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FrBFyF7ta3Y&t=83s
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Sep 14, 2021 15:24
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yeah I've been kinda struggling with the thought that I'm just not fun or interesting to be around, and a friend of mine keeps saying he should teach me. It sounds interesting but I dont have a lot of musical talent and I'm concerned about being publicly bad at it which kind of makes matters worse E: I have taken up miniature painting recently and I'm doing pretty good at it, it doesnt seem to be as good a conversation piece but it's fun and it has reminded me I can be good at things again so theres that
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Sep 14, 2021 15:36
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StashAugustine posted:yeah I've been kinda struggling with the thought that I'm just not fun or interesting to be around, and a friend of mine keeps saying he should teach me. It sounds interesting but I dont have a lot of musical talent and I'm concerned about being publicly bad at it which kind of makes matters worse If you have a friend who's eager to teach you something, you must have something going on that interests people. I honestly put all creative endeavors in the same category: music, painting, writing, etc. are all ways of expressing yourself. I think creating in any form is cool. Some forms of creating have more mass appeal than others. I'd like to see the miniatures, and I know there are other people on these forums who like that sort of thing too. I like painting acrylic on canvas. I mostly paint animals, as I find life fascinating. It's an incredibly mindful activity, and I like to try to make it a social activity. I have tons of art materials, and I try to get people to create stuff with me. A lot of people seem interested, but are afraid because they don't think they're very good at it. I honestly don't think I'm very good at painting, but people seem to like what I make. I encourage people to try stuff and find what they like. I was a bit hypomanic last christmas, and I got the supplies to make nice greeting cards and ornaments. I made an imgur album of some stuff I made: https://imgur.com/a/iFZnMNy A couple examples:   Ice Phisherman posted:So I have this problem that I'm not great at reading my body's emotional cues to the point that I'm frequently oblivious about my emotional state. Not a covid thing, just a persistent thing that I and at least a few others have noticed. The stress from covid makes it worse but I don't think it's new. It sounds frustrating for people to be aware of your emotions before you are. I learn a lot about myself every time I write. I do day-to-day journaling, and sometimes I'll just bang out an essay on something that I'm thinking about. I censor myself depending on the audience I write for, so I don't write it for anyone but myself. You seem like a skilled writer, and I think that might appeal to you. I don't want to dissuade anyone from trying out music, but there might be other creative outlets for you. One of those articles I read earlier recommended the YAMAHA FG800 as a good beginning acoustic guitar.
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Sep 14, 2021 18:12
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no one has to be objectively good at their creative outlets. but if anyone is thinking about getting into drawing (or painting), then I'd suggest picking up a copy of Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain. it's a well known drawing instruction book that will help you improve almost immediately, which I find helps boost confidence even if you're just doing abstracts or only doing art for yourself. it's also nice to have a bit of a structured approach when learning to draw, as opposed to just muddling your way through, I've found you should be able to find used copies for cheap at most good used book stores as it's pretty ubiquitous. e: also I find photography a fun creative outlet too. if you have a smartphone, you can Do Photography, so in that regard it's cheap Crusty Nutsack has issued a correction as of 18:26 on Sep 14, 2021 |
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Sep 14, 2021 18:23
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StashAugustine posted:yeah I've been kinda struggling with the thought that I'm just not fun or interesting to be around, and a friend of mine keeps saying he should teach me. It sounds interesting but I dont have a lot of musical talent and I'm concerned about being publicly bad at it which kind of makes matters worse Somebody who is offering to to teach you really just wants to chill and play music with someone, and I promise they don't care if you're good or bad at it. The fun is in the process of figuring stuff out. when you're just jamming with somebody there aren't any rules. If it's something your friend can teach I recommend starting on bass guitar. You learn a lot about rhythm and holding a beat and imo it's a LOT less pressure as someone less musically inclined starting from scratch when you're playing with skilled musicians. Source: I recently started learning after my partner was feeling sad about people getting too caught up in their head about their musical abilities to just chill and play music with him. I suck and I still get in my head about it but it's fun and getting easier.
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Sep 14, 2021 18:53
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Crusty Nutsack posted:no one has to be objectively good at their creative outlets. but if anyone is thinking about getting into drawing (or painting), then I'd suggest picking up a copy of Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain. it's a well known drawing instruction book that will help you improve almost immediately, which I find helps boost confidence even if you're just doing abstracts or only doing art for yourself. it's also nice to have a bit of a structured approach when learning to draw, as opposed to just muddling your way through, I've found Thanks for the suggestion! I grabbed Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain and Brushwork Essentials ebooks. I think a more guided experience will keep me interested.
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Sep 14, 2021 20:07
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thanks for the advice, think I'll at least try it out. In retrospect "spend more time letting a friend show off his hobby" is kind of an obvious answer there.Uganda Loves Me posted:I'd like to see the miniatures, and I know there are other people on these forums who like that sort of thing too. I do post them in some different places- mostly Star Wars stuff but here's one that sufficiently C-Spam. I wanted one of my Rebel commandos based on the novel Shatterpoint, a sort of Heart of Darkness story about an anti-colonial guerilla war set during the clone wars, but since the guerilla's outfits aren't really described in the book I ended up drawing on Cuban- provided uniforms in the Angloan civil war 
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Sep 14, 2021 21:12
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Shatterpoint, Matthew Stover posted:"Don’t tell me you can’t fight the jungle. That’s what Korunnai do. Don’t you understand that? That’s what their whole culture is based on. That’s what the Summertime War is about. The offworlders want to use the jungle: to live with it, to profit from it. The Korunnai want to beat it into submission. To make it into something that is no longer trying to eat them alive. Now, think: Why do Korunnai do that? Why are they enemies of the jungle?”
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Sep 14, 2021 21:13
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Looks good! I like that the patterns and colors have a story. Painting on a flat surface is difficult enough for me. I spent an audible credit on the audiobook too. I could use something different. I'm taking inventory of all my different types of paints, and figuring out their individual quality and texture. I've been wanting to do an art project involving a solo journaling rpg and playing cards. I've been trying to get various types of paint to stick to the cards, but I think I'll try some primer first. Acrylic paint sticks to the cards, but it slides along it a bit too easily to get much detail. It's not like canvas, which grabs the paint and holds it in place. Maybe I should be reading about model painting.
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Sep 14, 2021 21:47
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Primer definitely helps, yeah. It might need a bit more manual dexterity, but I think painting 3d surfaces is actually a bit easier, at least to get a minimum quality, since you can rely on the sculpture for shading and highlighting. Like those darkened creases on the outfits are just done by painting the whole thing in very thinned black, and on other stuff lightly applying a brush can highlight the edges and peaks very easily
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Sep 14, 2021 21:55
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I'm trying very hard to focus on good stuff today, but god drat. I called my clinic friday about swollen lymph nodes and a possible broken foot. They promised a video appointment monday, with a potential in-person appointment if I called early Monday morning. I called right at their opening time, and they didn't have anything in person available. Due to "technical difficulties," the video appointment became a phone appointment. I had a strep throat swab today. They say I'll probably get the results by friday. Only afterward did I learn that there's an instant strep throat test. I know that's not 100% accurate, and it's used in conjunction with the swab and culture they did. Would've been nice if they took that precaution. The nurse who performed the swab seemed to be under the impression that someone had actually seen me. She asked if anyone prescribed antibiotics. I had an in-person appointment scheduled for tomorrow morning, and they informed me that it'll be a phone appointment because the covid test hasn't come through yet. The next available in-person appointment is in a week. I'll be able to go in without requiring negative covid test results next week, as they'll have taken so loving long, I'll be past the quarantine period. With the benefit of my 20/20 hindsight, I know I should have just gone to the local urgent care last friday. I waited because I thought I'd get something resembling acceptable treatment from the people who know me. They were only able to do the strep swab today because I showed up and stayed in the sick person tent out front. I kept my distance, wore my mask, and didn't even go in the reception room. They gave me no instructions for any of that. I have a feeling they didn't cancel today's strep swab due to an oversight. I was already going to fire my therapist and psychiatric nurse practitioner from this place, but it looks like I'll just find an entirely new location. A friend from NAMI recommended another place. I'm going to wear my n95 mask, sit alone in that tent, and ask that someone comes out to see me tomorrow morning. It sounds like the physician assistant I'll be "seeing" will be on-site. I don't want to put anyone at risk of covid, as I haven't received the negative result yet. If I had gone somewhere else for covid testing on friday, I'd already have the results by now. I know that clinic is full of overworked and underpaid healthcare workers, so I don't want to take it out on them. A part of me wants to go full karen and demand treatment until the cops drag me away, though. EDIT: The coronavirus test came back negative this morning, so I can actually go in person without causing problems. EDIT 2: The physician assistant that I've been seeing for years thought we were meeting for the first time. He didn't bother checking my lymph nodes, and decided the issue was allergies, entirely located in my sinuses. I can feel the swelling and the pain, I can feel it when I swallow, and I can even see the swelling in the mirror. At least he referred me to get my foot x-rayed, finally. I asked about the instant strep test, and they actually performed it this time. Came back negative. Oh, and they tried to make it a phone appointment. It was an hour and a half wait at the imaging place, and they didn't have enough seating. I was standing on my injured foot on hardwood floor. I was able to put my weight on my other foot and lean against a wall at least. I felt bad for the people with canes and home-made bandages on their feet. Uganda Loves Me has issued a correction as of 21:02 on Sep 15, 2021 |
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Sep 15, 2021 04:24
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Ice Phisherman posted:So I have this problem that I'm not great at reading my body's emotional cues to the point that I'm frequently oblivious about my emotional state. Not a covid thing, just a persistent thing that I and at least a few others have noticed. The stress from covid makes it worse but I don't think it's new. your body's emotional cues? do you mean for example when ur mad ur hands tense up and you were oblivious to that? thehandtruck has issued a correction as of 05:11 on Sep 16, 2021 |
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Sep 15, 2021 16:21
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man my therapist fuckin sucks he back to backs appointments all day long and just tells me to be better.
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Sep 16, 2021 20:01
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he closed out today's session with an anecdote about how my kids are gonna be alcoholics when they turn sixteen because they watched me drink beer.
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Sep 16, 2021 20:58
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poo poo POST MALONE posted:he closed out today's session with an anecdote about how my kids are gonna be alcoholics when they turn sixteen because they watched me drink beer. That's really bad. I cancelled my future appointments with my therapist, and won't be making any more with them. I want one with some understanding of social structures and the society we live in, but I have a feeling that's not going to happen any time soon. Peer support will have to tide me over. If you have the option, I'd highly recommend kicking them to the curb and maybe even filing a complaint. We had another NAMI monthly forum over zoom last night. We had a bunch of trolls show up, and I quickly booted them. One of them asked if I moderated many zoom meetings before I gave him the boot. I don't think he was used to people actually getting rid of them so quickly haha. I'm going to have to set up some registration system for the meetings. We already don't get many people, and I was afraid we might get even fewer people this way. I'm also wondering if that extra engagement before the meeting will get more people to actually show up, though. We had a couple peers from the local county mental health services show up to tell us their story. It was all framed as a success story, from a bad childhood to becoming "productive." One of them actually used the word productive. They seem like really good people who use their experience to help others in exchange for a pretty low paycheck. I want to get peer support training, and potentially do what they do. I think that's my most accessible option for employment that actually makes me feel like I'm making a difference. I really don't like seeing people paraded around as success stories like that, though. I know a lot of people with a wide variety of diagnoses at this point, and consider many of them friends. They're all still struggling. After years of therapy, psychiatry, medication, learning coping skills, going to support groups, and even attending intensive classes, they're STILL struggling. It feels dishonest to turn a lifelong struggle into a simple narrative ending with employment, especially when many will never achieve that. Those who do end up with full-time jobs may end up with even worse symptoms as a result. I feel like people are trying to turn my life into this kind of narrative. I can give the appearance of stability and productivity, but I feel like I'm constantly suffering in the process. Maintaining that facade is bad for my mental health. Many of the parents of peers I talk to at NAMI tell us stories of their adult children being on the streets, in prison, or stuck with anosognosia (having an illness and not realizing it. Why would someone take medication or see professionals if they don't think there's anything wrong?). These families see their loved ones' struggles framed as a matter of just needing to pull a bit harder on their own bootstraps. Systemic problems are treated as individual problems caused by character flaws. They might not have the framework to explain things in this manner, but they know the system is broken. So many of us peers will never be the productive members of society that everyone wants us to be. One parent mentioned that she had received advice to kick her son out on the street. She fully has the right to do so, and should do so if her safety is in jeopardy. However, too many people will frame this as "tough love." Draw your boundaries and keep safe. That's your right. Don't pretend homelessness is some tool to help people. That's a systemic failure. EDIT: I modified the post a bit to remove any reference to people here, and put it up on my facebook. This is the first time I've ever been so open about this stuff. I'm really struggling, and I'm so loving beyond caring if anyone thinks less of me for speaking up. Uganda Loves Me has issued a correction as of 21:53 on Sep 16, 2021 |
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Sep 16, 2021 21:42
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I think I quickly realized that this guy (who i found through my wife's work's mental health outreach program) is just there to make sure I don't hurt myself, my kids, my spouse and then he tries to get me back to being a useful member of society. he absolutely does not want to hear about my daily existential nightmare regarding existence and the crushing weight of being awake.
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Sep 16, 2021 21:52
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poo poo POST MALONE posted:I think I quickly realized that this guy (who i found through my wife's work's mental health outreach program) is just there to make sure I don't hurt myself, my kids, my spouse and then he tries to get me back to being a useful member of society. You deserve so much better than that. I'll once again give my usual recommendation of finding peer support in your local area. In the US, NAMI is pretty good. There's also DBSA, and any number of local organizations that may exist depending on your location. You probably won't be around people who are on the same page as you politically, but they'll at least have the understanding of how the system fails people like them.
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Sep 16, 2021 21:56
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the hosed up part is that when you say something like "the solution to this issue is not utterable out loud" you immediately get pegged as a chud. he started talking about j6 as if that was at all what I was talking about.
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Sep 16, 2021 22:14
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your therapist tells you to do better and says you’re spouting right wing taking points. what’s his username?
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Sep 16, 2021 22:41
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Uganda Loves Me posted:some serious poo poo Thanks for sharing, it is a tragedy that it is difficult for people to talk frankly about mental health issues even anonymously. Kudos for moderating those meetings, that must be challenging. "Full-time employment" seems like the absolute last metric to measure mental health by. I was handling ~30 hours a week with a persistent stabbing pain in my gut and not being able to sleep for more that 2 hours without jolting awake in a cold sweat. Obviously my company was making accommodations but I am a great multitasker and was probably outperforming most of my peers. I went into therapy with the goal of not suffering from anxiety any more, and I refused to accept the idea of treatment and demanded a cure. Not sure where that came from, not a single person that I have ever talked to about my anxiety ever said that word. Not sure if this sounds hopeful or condescending, but I pushed through all of that and I'm in a much better place today. I don't know if there is a path out there for you to find a way past your suffering, but I would recommend telling yourself there is because what is the alternative?
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Sep 16, 2021 23:16
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mawarannahr posted:your therapist tells you to do better and says you’re spouting right wing taking points. what’s his username? he also started talking about hillary/bill's 93 healthcare push as a reason why healthcare is where it is today and I just did Wide Eyes at him.
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Sep 16, 2021 23:38
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if I had a therapist that said the kind of poo poo to me that y’all seem to tolerate I’d probably cuss them out and walk out the door that’s not meant as advice, I’m just sayin DoubleDonut has issued a correction as of 23:47 on Sep 16, 2021 |
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Sep 16, 2021 23:44
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DoubleDonut posted:if I had a therapist that said the kind of poo poo to me that y’all seem to tolerate I’d probably cuss them out and walk out the door Agreed
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Sep 16, 2021 23:58
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DoubleDonut posted:if I had a therapist that said the kind of poo poo to me that y’all seem to tolerate I’d probably cuss them out and walk out the door I need to figure out how to do this via zoom. and, to my credit, I drink most of my beers in shameful secret like an actual alcoholic.
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Sep 17, 2021 00:33
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MMania posted:Thanks for sharing, it is a tragedy that it is difficult for people to talk frankly about mental health issues even anonymously. Kudos for moderating those meetings, that must be challenging. Thanks! My mood is pretty low at the moment, and that's reflected in what I wrote. I'm never giving up. I'm just tired of feeling the need to pretend to be okay. I know a lot of people around here know better than to use employment as a measure of success, and I honestly don't think I'm a failure for not doing well financially. I put a lot of "work" into NAMI and helping people. Most of it is unpaid. I think what I do is valuable, and it helps me get by. I have a lot of people I care about and look forward to seeing. I'm going to try to get peer employment training and get work through the county. I think that's something I would actually look forward to doing, and I would actually have some understanding from my employer. I shared this writeup with pretty much everyone I know today, and I've actually received a lot of positive feedback. I feel very lucky to have an outlet like this, where people have an understanding of the mental health component along with an understanding of the societal framework we live in. Most of the leadership in my local NAMI are not peers. They tend to be fairly conservative too. They try to instill hope in fellow parents by sharing these redemption stories of peers who managed to get a job. Last night, the parents who attended our meeting were talking about their kids who have anosognosia (lack of insight so they don't think they have a mental illness). They were almost all homeless or in prison. The one mother who had her peer son living with her was being told to kick him out for his own good (not by people at NAMI, but other people she talked to). Too many people are convinced that we need to hit "rock bottom" before anything improves. We just need help and understanding. I just feel like we should be more honest about the narratives of peers. Picking and choosing stories from people who achieved "success" seems a bit too much like the prosperity gospel. EDIT: My mind is all over the place, and I feel like I missed a few things. You sound like a very resilient person MMania. I'm glad you've found yourself in a much better place. I wish we lived in a world where people didn't have to push through things like that. Some forms of mental health problems can be mostly overcome. My anxiety makes me feel like garbage, but I can push through it. At times, I'm not all that anxious. I know it's possible that I'll find ways to reduce its effects. I can't stand anxiety meds. I also have bipolar II, which is a life-long problem. I think I'm getting closer to finding the right combination of medications to help me deal with it better. It's something that I'll need to be in treatment for the rest of my life, though. I hope I can get to a point where I don't need to see a psychiatrist very often, and maybe I can even reduce the meds I take. There's a very real possibility that if I lapse in my treatment, I'll end up dead though. Running out of meds for a single day puts me in withdrawal symptoms, and makes functioning very challenging. If I go 2 or 3 days, I'll be mostly horizontal until the withdrawal passes. I can manage that, and I know a lot of people have it much worse than me. I'm generalizing a lot of different perspectives when I talk about society's measure of success. I'm getting a lot of pressure from my family to do "real" work. I do a lot of manual labor for my parents, I'm active with NAMI, and I help take care of my sister who has special needs. Most of that pays nothing or very little. I get that if I want a better quality of life, I'll need to work somewhere that pays me a living wage. I should probably be more specific whether I'm talking about "is" versus "ought," too. Mental health workers have to work within the framework of what is, and they try to help us in a broken system. I think finding a therapist who agrees with me on the way things ought to be would be validating. In the meantime, writing, being open with non-peers, and talking to peers will carry me through. Uganda Loves Me has issued a correction as of 02:02 on Sep 17, 2021 |
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Sep 17, 2021 00:40
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poo poo Post - Are you sure you aren't just continuing to listen to this idiot "therapist" because its almost like reading the D&D USNEWs thread IRL? I too would have a difficult time just quitting because i'd want to see what the next gross thing was to come out of their mouth. Its an addiction to succ.
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Sep 17, 2021 00:50
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silicone thrills posted:poo poo Post - he doesn't talk enough for that to be the case. I think he's just a dumbass in shoreline. I could find a new one but that is way more work than buying more weed.
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Sep 17, 2021 02:00
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jesus that gets me riled up. i run a case consultation group and basically the one thing i wont abide by is succ like that. every once in a while when a newer person brings it to the group the older members mute their mics and watch the show because i stamp it out pretty good. come to think of it thats the onyl thread i cant read cause it gets me too upset
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Sep 17, 2021 05:06
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I think a telling portion of my session yesterday was the dude saying "I can't prescribe anything." to me as if I was even asking for medication. makes me think maybe I do need it lol
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Sep 17, 2021 19:00
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poo poo POST MALONE posted:I think a telling portion of my session yesterday was the dude saying "I can't prescribe anything." to me as if I was even asking for medication. If you want a recommendation for a good psychiatrist in seattle and have kaiser as an option, my psyche is at the cap hill campus and is fantastic.
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Sep 17, 2021 19:08
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we are on my wife's insurance now (because I'm just a dumb idiot without a job) and I don't think it's Kaiser.
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Sep 17, 2021 19:18
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Really hard trying to manage covid, working and caring for my mother who has increasingly terrible dementia. She spends hours a day either crying or screaming now and just repeats the same things over and over. Really don't know what to do but I'm on the verge of just loving off. Mom gets incredibly angry when I imply she should move into a community with other people and specialists for her care. Not sure what other options I have besides just going totally crazy.
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Sep 19, 2021 00:13
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I had some very triggering things happen all at once, and ended up checking into a 23-hour mental health urgent care for the night. I stayed about as long as they allowed me. It was a pretty miserable experience until the end, when I got to video chat with a great psychiatrist. I feel like I have some direction. I also chatted with a couple peers. After hearing their experiences in this miserable hellworld, I feel like a spoiled brat leading a charmed existence. I'm doing my best to reach out to my parents, and I've received tons of positive comments from extended family on facebook about my writing. I didn't realize just how much anxiety was loving up my life until yesterday. I bumped up a medication, which should help with depression and anxiety. I can't stand specifically anti-anxiety meds. I also spoke to a couple social workers who didn't seem all that great. I didn't even realize one was a social worker until the next day when I asked when I'd get to see one. The other one seemed to be too big on toxic positivity, and tried to convince me there's no downside to telling everyone about my mental illness. I get that she was trying to set me on a good path with the limited time we had together, but that didn't seem like a good approach. When I was done talking about the effects of stigma and the prognosis of people with anosognosia and a serious diagnosis, I thought she was going to cry. I felt bad about that, and it makes me wonder how well I'd handle someone like me.CaptainACAB posted:Really hard trying to manage covid, working and caring for my mother who has increasingly terrible dementia. She spends hours a day either crying or screaming now and just repeats the same things over and over. I don't really have any advice, other than that you have every right to draw boundaries and protect yourself. That sounds like an absolute nightmare. Please take care of yourself.
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Sep 19, 2021 01:07
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poo poo POST MALONE posted:I think a telling portion of my session yesterday was the dude saying "I can't prescribe anything." to me as if I was even asking for medication. That idiot fucker is bringing poo poo into the room with him, and it's causing you to second guess what you're saying and analyze his little comments. You gotta get out of there dude that space is not for you anymore he's stealing it from you
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Sep 19, 2021 03:07
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Now that i live in the same country as my brother, he and my SIL are slowly coming to the realization how much of a mess I am. If they didn't already. I already know it was my dad's plan for him to get me a job there, now I wonder just how much of it was for them to become my babysitters. They already figured out the reason why I never invite them over or claim i don't invite them up because my house is "a mess" is because i don't bother cleaning and have already proposed setting a date in advance for their visit. So now I have to keep my house in order for potential visitors. Great. They even gave me the "You're 34 already, you should know better" speech. gently caress.
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Sep 19, 2021 16:16
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