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Renegret posted:Every day I'm reminded that the bar for being considered a good dad is set excruciatingly low. I got complimented today because I change diapers??? Apparently some dad's don't do that. Like what?
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Sep 20, 2021 23:20
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L0cke17 posted:I got complimented today because I change diapers??? Apparently some dad's don't do that. Like what? I got complimented at a wedding by an elderly lady because I was out in the church hallway bouncing my daughter in a (failed) attempt to get her to sleep so I could put her in her car seat. “Love to see you dads helping out and holding your kids!” Which is both sad for them and for me too in weird way—it’s like we get participation trophies when people catch us doing what, in this day and age, dads are supposed to do: be parents. I guess back in that lady’s time, the men were off in their mahogany studies smoking pipes and telling their wives and kids not to disturb them so they could work on their golf swing
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Sep 20, 2021 23:31
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Total nap time for baby today: 10 minutes. I finally got her to sleep in the stroller, but the sound of dad opening the screen door made her wake up. Big bottle and being rocked in her dimly lit room did nothing to put her back to sleep. 10 minutes of sleep over the course of 9 hours.  It’s almost time for dinner and she’s still showing no signs of sleepiness. I can only hope she’ll sleep well tonight, but she’s been going through a sleep regression and hasn’t slept through the night in 2 weeks and has more often than not been waking at 3am and not going to sleep for 1.5-2 hours. My bed time is no later than 9 now, just to compensate for the lack of sleep I’ve been getting.
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Sep 20, 2021 23:51
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Wait until the biodad's scumball attorney uses the fact that you send your daughter to his place with pull-ups and changes of clothes due to her coming back in pee-soaked underwear to paint your wife as an overbearing control freak to a disinterested judge. We have mediation coming up because fuckface is refusing to sign off on a non-suit motion now that the stuff we wanted is moot and said associate judge set us for an October trail. Can't wait to walk into another buzzsaw. And glad to hear that I'm not the only one dealing with imposture syndrome just because I keep doing what I think is the bare minimum of effort to keep my wife from killing me in my sleep only to discover that the bar is set so low I'm basically in low earth orbit above it.
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Sep 20, 2021 23:51
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Renegret posted:Every day I'm reminded that the bar for being considered a good dad is set excruciatingly low. I was the house-dad for three years, from my first son being a newborn all the way to 3yo and people didn't/STILL don't believe it when I tell them. Yes, my wife was the bread winner and I kept the house up and took care of our son. After doing that it's absolutely infuriating hearing about how some dads will literally do NOTHING for or with their kids. I just don't understand it. Now things are reversed, I'm the bread winner and my wife is the stay at home parent and honestly my heart goes out to her. I'm so proud and inspired by her every day, to the point it drives me to new heights of effort at my own job. I was the house spouse with just one kid, and next to my current job it was absolutely the hardest job I've ever had. Now she's doing it with two (7 and 3), and dealing with virtual school, all during the plague times. I just can't imagine. I get home from working 10-13 hours sometimes, dead on my feet (my job is physically intense to say the least) and when I come inside yeah, there are dishes in the sink and toys scattered about, and my wife actually feels GUILTY. gently caress that. I know what it's like! I know what you're dealing with! I KNOW how hard it is! That's why when I get home and get showered, I grab both boys and dissappear into our bedroom for Thomas the Train etc. and action figure wars. Mom needs a break, I'll get mine when they fall asleep.
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Sep 20, 2021 23:51
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L0cke17 posted:I got complimented today because I change diapers??? Apparently some dad's don't do that. Like what? My sister-in-law's husband didn't change their first-born's diapers until he was just shy of 2yo. And that was only because their second-born was making my sister-in-law very preoccupied. He's since become a pretty okay dad, but those first few years of fatherhood were not a good look for him.
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Sep 21, 2021 01:03
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life is killing me posted:I got complimented at a wedding by an elderly lady because I was out in the church hallway bouncing my daughter in a (failed) attempt to get her to sleep so I could put her in her car seat. “Love to see you dads helping out and holding your kids!” About a year and a half ago my wife's grandma died. I got lots of compliments from random old people after the funeral at church for... keeping my kid quiet and entertained? Like the gently caress was I supposed to do? Leave mommy by herself to do everything while I sat there bored at a funeral for a woman I never met?
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Sep 21, 2021 01:47
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Good-Natured Filth posted:My sister-in-law's husband didn't change their first-born's diapers until he was just shy of 2yo. And that was only because their second-born was making my sister-in-law very preoccupied. He's since become a pretty okay dad, but those first few years of fatherhood were not a good look for him. Someone asked me a few weeks ago (over a month after my daughter was born) "Have you changed any dirty diapers yet?" Yes about 100
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Sep 21, 2021 01:55
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I’m like, a diaper-changing expert, you guys Anyway—night one of wife out of town and survived so far Except that my toddler had a whole melatonin gummy, and 45 minutes later he’s tossing and turning and whining but not crying…like he’s having trouble sleeping. No idea wtf but hopefully this doesn’t go on all night. He’s gotta fall asleep sometime, right? fake edit: went in there to ask him what’s wrong when I saw him sit up, and he goes, “I miss Mommy” as the reason he can’t fall asleep. Not sure I buy that life is killing me fucked around with this message at 03:11 on Sep 21, 2021 |
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Sep 21, 2021 03:05
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Baby bedtime took all of 20 minutes, he was out by 7:50pm. Toddler was charged up, it took an hour and a half to get her to go to sleep. She was being so cute I couldn’t be frustrated, but every minute that ticked by was another minute of sleep I know I’m losing until the baby wakes up again, most likely at 11pm. It’s just before 10pm and I’m getting myself to sleep now so I can get a whole hour before I’m up again. Doesn’t help that baby still has a cold so I’ve been up soooooo much these past few nights sucking boogers out of his poor little nose.
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Sep 21, 2021 03:46
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Deceptive Thinker posted:Someone asked me a few weeks ago (over a month after my daughter was born) "Have you changed any dirty diapers yet?" I changed the baby's first diaper This seemed to have solved ask diaper questions Highly recommend
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Sep 21, 2021 05:47
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life is killing me posted:fake edit: went in there to ask him what’s wrong when I saw him sit up, and he goes, “I miss Mommy” as the reason he can’t fall asleep. Not sure I buy that Totally plausible I think.
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Sep 21, 2021 06:59
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Hadlock posted:This seemed to have solved ask diaper questions I also did that first diaper. Our daughter pretty much has a set time for pooping, i.e. 30 minutes after I pick her up from daycare and well before my wife gets home, so I end up changing most of them. In the last 3 years, nothing has come close to that first diaper.
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Sep 21, 2021 10:23
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1up posted:My oldest is 7 and one of the hallmarks of her combined ADHD is emotional dysregulation, so when she gets emotional it goes straight to a fuckin 10 and stays there for a bit. I have a very lovely note on my fridge that says "I don't hate you anymore" with a drawing of her and I in a heart. When they told me that stuff they where very calm and reasonable. I never took offense because they weren't saying it in anger, just calmy saying it as if commenting on the weather, "daddy you hurt me when you said I couldn't buy X, I don't think you should live with us" and variations on that theme. I calmy replied each time that I know but someone has to put their foot down and I would be doing them a disfavour if I allowed them to always get what they wanted, you don't always get what you want in life, etc etc. These kids also diagnosed ADHD btw, looking like we're gonna have to consider medication for them to be able to perform in school even with their personal assistants. His Divine Shadow fucked around with this message at 11:14 on Sep 21, 2021 |
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Sep 21, 2021 11:12
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We are on the medication journey with our 8 year old. It has made a world of difference. He's also in therapy to help him deal with his behavior as well. It took some trial and error, but it seems like we found a medication / dosage that is working for him right now. If you give it some time (I think usually a week) and it's not working, don't worry about going back to the doctor to talk about it. His first medication the dosage wasn't lasting long enough. When it got raised, it made him super aggressive and violent. We switched to a different type and it's working well! I don't get constant messages from his teacher about how he wasn't keeping his hands to himself, interrupting, or policing other student's behavior.
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Sep 21, 2021 11:45
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femcastra posted:Totally plausible I think. Eh, it would be more plausible to me if he wasn’t supposed to be knocked the hell out, he told me his bottom hurt and he’s been having poop problems lately. Plus day three of doctor’s orders of half a capful of miralax last night. If he doesn’t improve today they will see him. In other news I woke up this morning with lower left back pain, probably from sleeping weird but will see if it improves. Fine when I’m sitting, sucks rear end when I stand up and walk anywhere
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Sep 21, 2021 12:52
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It's just life, killing you.
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Sep 21, 2021 13:16
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His Divine Shadow posted:It's just life, killing you. Heyyy oooooo
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Sep 21, 2021 13:36
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Hadlock posted:I changed the baby's first diaper That first diaper was full of colors I didn't know existed.
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Sep 21, 2021 15:19
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I swear my kid can tell when my arm or back is sore and demands extra up-ups.
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Sep 21, 2021 15:23
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What the HELL are kids up to these days? So, small backstory - my 7 year old daughter loves scary movies. Since she was about 4 when she accidentally watched Gremlins, she has loved them. We haven't really let her watch anything above Gremlins though and actually have scaled things back the past year or so. She used to watch these Sirenhead videos on YouTube until we figured out she was watching them. One day she accidentally got onto some creepypasta stuff and scared the poo poo out of herself. YT is now banned and she doesn't watch any of that stuff anymore for at least a year now. We also just moved to NC and she is at a new school. Yesterday she came back telling us, just totally nonchalantly that they were playing "Killers" at recess. Wife and I immediately perked up. "Uh what's killers? That sounds like something you shouldn't play." "Oh don't worry - it's just tag, but we make it more fun by pretending we're all famous monsters." "Like who?" "Well today Ben was Pennywise, Neil was Slenderman, I was Slenderina - Slenderman's sister, and then there was Cartoon Dog and Cartoon Cat." I was taken aback of course, but that was BEFORE I looked up who the gently caress Cartoon Dog & Cat were. Holy poo poo. Anyway I foresee some future parent calls coming our way.
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Sep 21, 2021 15:54
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Oh word it’s amplified by lovely parents manipulating their kids on YT to make them money? Awesome I love the internet https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v1TGR8O9H5s Fake edit: my first contribution was to say I think kids are just exposed to more scary stuff because of growing fandom among parents. Like this year a neighbor with a 6 and 9 year old already has his life size Pennywise mannequin out by the front door for Halloween. Last year one kid was Georgie and the other was Pennywise. Just how it is But then I quickly googled Cartoon Dog and yea there ya go, like you said probably just unsupervised entertainment amplified by their being absolutely no platform-based content control
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Sep 21, 2021 16:02
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At least the playground game isn't "Elsa vaccinates pregnant Spider-Man" 
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Sep 21, 2021 16:07
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Shifty Pony posted:I swear my kid can tell when my arm or back is sore and demands extra up-ups. I have shifted my power-lifting to nights after kiddo goes down to avoid this fate. Thank goodness for garage gyms.
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Sep 21, 2021 16:31
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My dad let me watch lots of horror movies as a kid and got me to laugh at the goofy special effects. I think I watched Rocky Horror Picture Show when I was 4 or 5 as well. But the thing that really got to me as a kid was a show with a lake monster. It made me terrified of taking a bath and my parents had to replace the dark green bath mat with a pink one to get me to go in the tub again. The show? It was an episode of Babar. I do plan to be more responsible than my dad was about what my kid watches though.
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Sep 21, 2021 17:16
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An acquaintance of mine let her kid goes as a super blood dripping cartoon cat for Halloween last year. He was 7. I have a kid the same age and had no idea who it was or how a 7 year old finds out about it.
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Sep 21, 2021 17:28
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wizzardstaff posted:At least the playground game isn't "Elsa vaccinates pregnant Spider-Man" At least they’d be following current cdc recommendations for pregnant folks.
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Sep 21, 2021 18:16
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My 8 year old was telling me about a playground game they play. He's the dad super hero (who is spiderman) and another kid is the mom super hero (who is wonder woman) and their kid doesn't know they're super heros. The kid finds out and runs away from home.
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Sep 21, 2021 18:37
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I look forward to days it rains just because I don't have to pedal a twenty year old bike uphill towing a carrier with a toddler to the park.
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Sep 21, 2021 18:42
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Nessa posted:My dad let me watch lots of horror movies as a kid and got me to laugh at the goofy special effects. I think I watched Rocky Horror Picture Show when I was 4 or 5 as well. But the thing that really got to me as a kid was a show with a lake monster. It made me terrified of taking a bath and my parents had to replace the dark green bath mat with a pink one to get me to go in the tub again. Ha she does love scary stuff though and I'm ok with some of it. She can watch Gremlins and she loves Goonies and some other light weight horror fare. But it's the really apocalyptic nightmare fuel like Cartoon Dog and Cartoon Cat (and Slenderman/Sirenhead) that I would like to keep her away from. A scary little monster is fine but something custom built to tap into lizard brain fight or flight dread just can't be good for a kid!
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Sep 21, 2021 19:18
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I'm afraid to google wtf cartoon dog and cartoon cat are...
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Sep 21, 2021 20:08
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truavatar posted:I'm afraid to google wtf cartoon dog and cartoon cat are... It's disturbing, do not recommend
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Sep 21, 2021 20:15
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I don’t get angry easily but I discovered the most infuriating thing today. My baby hates the car. The car needed oil so I had to drive to get it. On the way there and back he is screaming bloody murder at the top of his lungs. I’m a mile from home, and the person in front of me is driving way below the speed limit in a no passing zone. 30 in a 45. GOOOO FASTERRRRRRRRRRRR davebo posted:I look forward to days it rains just because I don't have to pedal a twenty year old bike uphill towing a carrier with a toddler to the park. I dread rainy days because we can’t go to the park and instead my toddler had to find ways to burn off energy inside.
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Sep 21, 2021 20:42
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Koivunen posted:I don’t get angry easily but I discovered the most infuriating thing today. My baby hates the car. The car needed oil so I had to drive to get it. On the way there and back he is screaming bloody murder at the top of his lungs. I’m a mile from home, and the person in front of me is driving way below the speed limit in a no passing zone. 30 in a 45. Hey there fellow car-hating baby buddy. It's really frustrating, especially cause you hear so much about people whose babies love the car/fall right to sleep in the car.
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Sep 21, 2021 20:46
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hallo spacedog posted:Hey there fellow car-hating baby buddy. It's really frustrating, especially cause you hear so much about people whose babies love the car/fall right to sleep in the car. Our second was/still is like this. We were so confused because the car always worked so well for our older child, but the younger has hated it since he was born. He's now almost 3 and still whines and complains and fusses if he is in the car longer than 10 minutes. I keep telling myself he will outgrow it or eventually get over it...
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Sep 21, 2021 20:57
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I seem to find myself behind slow movers or pedantic RIGHT EXACTLY AT THE SPEED LIMIT folks on my no passing road I take to get home, every single time one or both of the kids are really pissed. Seems like an eternity and my wife is over next to me going, “Don’t tailgate them Babe. We are almost home…” I DO NOT CARE. I MUST TAILGATE THEM IN ORDER FOR THEM TO SEE THE ERROR OF THEIR WAYS
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Sep 21, 2021 21:08
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Douche4Sale posted:Our second was/still is like this. We were so confused because the car always worked so well for our older child, but the younger has hated it since he was born. He's now almost 3 and still whines and complains and fusses if he is in the car longer than 10 minutes. I keep telling myself he will outgrow it or eventually get over it... Oh no please don't tell me this could last several more years
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Sep 21, 2021 21:25
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We got one of those DVD players that hangs from the headrest and my kid went from hating the car to getting excited to get in. Downside is listening to the same goddamn sesame street DVD a million times
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Sep 22, 2021 00:45
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BonoMan posted:Ha she does love scary stuff though and I'm ok with some of it. She can watch Gremlins and she loves Goonies and some other light weight horror fare. But it's the really apocalyptic nightmare fuel like Cartoon Dog and Cartoon Cat (and Slenderman/Sirenhead) that I would like to keep her away from. A scary little monster is fine but something custom built to tap into lizard brain fight or flight dread just can't be good for a kid! Gremlins is awesome and a great early horror movie. Cute mascot character with Gizmo and enough humour to keep things from getting too dark. Has she seen many older Don Bluth films? I always loved them as a kid because they weren’t afraid to get a little scary at times. Land Before Time, Secret of NIMH, and All Dogs Go To Heaven primarily.
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Sep 22, 2021 01:44
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hallo spacedog posted:Oh no please don't tell me this could last several more years fwiw mine hated the car when he was born but grew to love it once we started taking him to school every day. Now that he's forward facing and he can see better everything's so much more fun too
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Sep 22, 2021 01:49
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