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Zulily Zoetrope
Jun 1, 2011

Muldoon

cumshitter posted:

I am that grandparent and I only stay involved in my grandson's life so that he doesn't end up as a failure like my son. I am personally funding his tuition to attend an all boy's pre-school and will continue funding his education after that.

what the gently caress is wrong with you

You should let the boy go to co-ed pre-school and elementary school, where he will socially learn that girls are gross and have cooties, and only have him in all-boys schools after that. No wonder your son turned out straight if this is how you parent.

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False Toaster
Dec 29, 2006

Stupidity, its both physically and mentally painful.
Is there anyone that’s available for me to talk to or something? Been going through a rough patch at the moment and it’s driving me nuts. Related to what I posted earlier. Depression and anxiety are kicking into overdrive right now. :smith:

Hughlander
May 11, 2005

Evil Willow posted:

AITA for being angry at my brother for not wanting to help our parents and sister?
From the research her and my parents did they thought it looked like she has something called cranio cervical instability. Eventually someone online recommended a doctor that helped them. The doctor wasn't nearby but did a video consultation with my sister where she was diagnosed with cranio cervical instability and prescribed surgery that could help.

wikipedia posted:

Craniocervical instability is usually diagnosed through neuro-anatomical measurement using radiography. Upright magnetic resonance imaging is considered the most accurate method, and supine magnetic resonance imaging, CT scan or digital motion X-ray, or Digital X-ray are also used.
Or you know a Zoom call.

I think I hear a duck quacking in the distance...

Punkinhead
Apr 2, 2015

False Toaster posted:

Is there anyone that’s available for me to talk to or something? Been going through a rough patch at the moment and it’s driving me nuts. Related to what I posted earlier. Depression and anxiety are kicking into overdrive right now. :smith:

https://forums.somethingawful.com/forumdisplay.php?forumid=214

There's a subforum for it, it's pretty great if a little slow. It happens to a ton of us and it's gonna be okay.

Batterypowered7
Aug 8, 2009

The mist that chills you keeps me warm.

PinheadSlim posted:

https://forums.somethingawful.com/forumdisplay.php?forumid=214

There's a subforum for it, it's pretty great if a little slow. It happens to a ton of us and it's gonna be okay.

Got some really good advice a decade ago in E/N. Would definitely recommend giving it a try.

Beachcomber
May 21, 2007

Another day in paradise.


Slippery Tilde
I gave someone a poopknife and it is apparently 'very helpful'.

False Toaster
Dec 29, 2006

Stupidity, its both physically and mentally painful.

PinheadSlim posted:

https://forums.somethingawful.com/forumdisplay.php?forumid=214

There's a subforum for it, it's pretty great if a little slow. It happens to a ton of us and it's gonna be okay.

Thank you. Just posted over there.

exmachina
Mar 12, 2006

Look Closer

ponzicar posted:

I bet it's Gabe Newell, and he's talking about the Half Life series.

I'm pretty sure Gaben is still hanging out here in New Zealand.

Agrikk
Oct 17, 2003

Take care with that! We have not fully ascertained its function, and the ticking is accelerating.

Midnight Voyager posted:

eeeh I've definitely seen cases of "twelve doctors got it wrong before one finally checked something else", but the video chat/no insurance thing? ooooof, that's a bad sign.

My son’s health was deteriorating over the course of a year and no doctor could help until finally one said let’s look at $test and found a tumor on his pancreas the size of a grapefruit. No one thought to check because this type of tumor happens so rarely: something like 60 cases a year in pre-teens across all of North America.

Yeah, doctors miss stuff so you have to keep advocating and hammering away. But a doctor performing surgery who doesn’t take insurance? What the gently caress is that?

Butter Activities
May 4, 2018

I asked significant other, M.D. and it doesn’t make any sense them either

wheatpuppy
Apr 25, 2008

YOU HAVE MY POST!
I just sort of assumed that "wouldn't take insurance" really meant "insurer won't pay for this sketchy poo poo."

Motronic
Nov 6, 2009

wheatpuppy posted:

I just sort of assumed that "wouldn't take insurance" really meant "insurer won't pay for this sketchy poo poo."

I assume that too.

Also, what kind of hospital would give a "surgeon" like that privileges? Or was this surgery done in a strip mall office?

Invisible Clergy
Sep 25, 2015

"Behold, I will corrupt your seed, and spread dung upon your faces"

Malachi 2:3

Hughlander posted:

AITA for inviting the son of a public figure to a house party to call out my friend who claims he was related to the public figure?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vTSmbMm7MDg&t=105s

Sir Sidney Poitier posted:

What is the thread's collective opinion on these people who have a crazy/awful parent but keep contact with them only for the 'benefit of the grandchild'? There have been a few examples posted recently. If a relative is bad enough that you don't want contact with them, why would you want your child to have contact with them? Is there something I'm missing?

Disclaimer: my viewpoint may be skewed by a mother in law that any future child of mine won't know. But that's because if she's bad enough that my partner's taken the difficult choice to not have contact with her mother to protect herself, surely she's bad enough that we'd seek to protect a child from her.

If they are not dependent on the bad parents for money or resources, then they are just spineless doormats with :decorum: poisoning.

Chloe Jessica
Nov 6, 2021
Pick 2.0
it's a quack trying to make a quick buck off a moron, what's hard to understand


Husband (38M) is paranoid about crime to an extreme level ever since we moved to Brooklyn. I (36F) am just not sure what to do anymore, especially considering my kids (13m, 14m) love it here now.

quote:

Early this year, my dad made a very surprising decision. He was going to move to Florida, and he was going to leave us his brownstone in Brooklyn to raise our family. Its in basically a middle class neighborhood. Its very classic 'brooklyn' area, very neighborhoody and a lot of the people there know each other on the streets, lots of corner stores and local restaurants. I used to joke around that it was just like hey arnold whenever I would visit as a kid. Both me and my husband were ecstatic. I mean, jesus, a free brownstone? In a nice walkable neighborhood with good schools? We always thought my dad would be living there another few decades (dad is only 57), but he is deadset on Florida now. He still gets the rent from the tenants in the bottom floor, so its not TOTALLY ours, but still.



At first, moving there was amazing. My husband was able to get a higher paying job very quickly. I had a few childhood neighborhood connections I reconnected with and became friends with some of them. It was hard to adjust to 'brooklynese' as me and my husband call it, which is a much faster, more intense form of conversation than we were used to, but the people here are largely delightful and charming and friendly.



However, my husband is hyper focused on issues with crime and drugs. He is souring on the neighborhood. This is a safe neighborhood, even with some grimey parts visually, crime rates are low. But he still is convinced its some shithole now. Its just weird how quickly he has changed his view on the area as time has gone on. Its almost like his standards have changed or something. He *always* has something to say about stuff now, almost like the mere sight of any possible 'undesirable' elements gets him anxious now. We were driving to costco in sunset park and passed what looked like a sex video shop, and he wouldn't stop going on about how there were no sex video shops in our old area, and how sketchy that was... this was miles away from where we lived, in a warehouse district. It just felt like he was BEGGING to find something to complain about, to confirm his belief that brooklyn was some poo poo hole. And this happens, a lot.



Its especially hard because our kids (14m, 13m) love it here now. They hated the idea of this at first, and now they cant get enough. I think the walkable streets are huge, it gives them so much more to do outside instead of relying on me to drive them everywhere. They used to spend so much time inside, just on their phones or computers, and now they spend a lot of time outside, usually with friends. Kind of a reversal of what is going on with my husband. But with the fear of crime, my husband is demanding we get more strict with the kids in terms of what they can do outside the house. He wants to get trackers on their phones in case they get 'kidnapped', which he seems to think is some kind of likely possibility here.



I am just not sure how to proceed. How do I get him to calm down about this stuff? Both of us don't want to move. But he feels stuck. Financially, it makes sense to stay. We have a big house. He has told me a bunch, even though he complains, he does not mean to say he wants to move, because he knows how great it is that we get to live here for free, especially with our previous financial struggles, this is like a blessing. I just feel like he is having a mental health crisis based on his anxieties about what city living actually means.



TL;DR - - Husband is way, way too anxious about stuff like crime and drugs in our new neighborhood in brooklyn.


i wonder where they moved from, because poo poo like this is almost always code for "im racist amd don't want to admit it"

(also when i was fetching this i found out my reddit account is suspended for harassment because i told a homophobe to eat poo poo and die, once. weeee :decorum:)

Invisible Clergy
Sep 25, 2015

"Behold, I will corrupt your seed, and spread dung upon your faces"

Malachi 2:3

Chloe Jessica posted:

Husband (38M) is paranoid about crime to an extreme level ever since we moved to Brooklyn. I (36F) am just not sure what to do anymore, especially considering my kids (13m, 14m) love it here now.

i wonder where they moved from, because poo poo like this is almost always code for "im racist amd don't want to admit it"

(also when i was fetching this i found out my reddit account is suspended for harassment because i told a homophobe to eat poo poo and die, once. weeee :decorum:)

They could've moved from anywhere that has fewer minorities than New York, so pretty much anywhere. Even if they did come from a diverse city, they probably moved from a suburb where they didn't actually see or interact with people around them that often, versus the husband having to see the (gasp!) nonwhites! on a daily basis while he's in line at the bodega or whatever.

tinytort
Jun 10, 2013

Super healthy, super cheap

wheatpuppy posted:

I just sort of assumed that "wouldn't take insurance" really meant "insurer won't pay for this sketchy poo poo."

Motronic posted:

I assume that too.

Also, what kind of hospital would give a "surgeon" like that privileges? Or was this surgery done in a strip mall office?

I'm assuming it's something like my ex-FIL looking for a doctor who was willing to do the surgery to remove his tumour but wouldn't require him to take pain meds or (if I remember right) be put under for it.

Someone will do it and there's always a hospital that will let them have privileges. You just have to sign a stack of waivers about three feet tall, promising that you were told this is an absolutely terrible idea and that it will result in pain and you could die.

In ex-FIL's case, there was only one doctor crazy enough to be willing to do it, because the surgery required splitting the man open and removing a large portion of his intestinal tract. Everyone else was requiring him to take painkillers.

He refused, because he's a recovered drug addict who now refuses to take anything stronger than ibuprofen.

Beachcomber
May 21, 2007

Another day in paradise.


Slippery Tilde

tinytort posted:

I'm assuming it's something like my ex-FIL looking for a doctor who was willing to do the surgery to remove his tumour but wouldn't require him to take pain meds or (if I remember right) be put under for it.

Someone will do it and there's always a hospital that will let them have privileges. You just have to sign a stack of waivers about three feet tall, promising that you were told this is an absolutely terrible idea and that it will result in pain and you could die.

In ex-FIL's case, there was only one doctor crazy enough to be willing to do it, because the surgery required splitting the man open and removing a large portion of his intestinal tract. Everyone else was requiring him to take painkillers.

He refused, because he's a recovered drug addict who now refuses to take anything stronger than ibuprofen.


Did he pass out, or...? Did they need to strap him down?

the holy poopacy
May 16, 2009

hey! check this out
Fun Shoe

Chloe Jessica posted:

Husband (38M) is paranoid about crime to an extreme level ever since we moved to Brooklyn. I (36F) am just not sure what to do anymore, especially considering my kids (13m, 14m) love it here now.

i wonder where they moved from, because poo poo like this is almost always code for "im racist amd don't want to admit it"

the post makes it sound like they did not very far, there's no talk of uprooting to move cross country. so it's entirely possible that they're from NY state, which I'm told has some deeply racist territory

Megillah Gorilla
Sep 22, 2003

If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.



Bread Liar

The_Franz posted:

when i was in school, my grandmother would occasionally send me a card with a $100 bill in it. i actually had a hard time spending it because none of the local stores around the university would take a bill that large. this was when gas stations still let you pump first and then pay, so i would usually just end up getting :10bux: worth of gas and pay with the $100 to get change.

what were they going to do, call the police and say that i'm trying to steal gas because they refuse to take my money?

I remember when people would pull that poo poo. Hope you like $90 in loving small coins, dickhead!


Foo Diddley posted:

did this town not have banks or did it not occur to you that they might have enough cash on hand to break a hundred

e:f,b

further edit: a grocery store can generally give you change for a hundred, too

Supermarkets are a great place to make change of large notes, not some poor bastard working at a gas station where the constant risk of robbery means they only have small amounts of cash in their till and being the tool who gives large notes for small sales can really gently caress up their ability to handle sales.

Megillah Gorilla fucked around with this message at 02:39 on Dec 11, 2021

cumshitter
Sep 27, 2005

by Fluffdaddy
Famous video game guy is the baseball player who tricked a state into giving him tons of money to make a video game isn't it?

Edit: Curt Schilling

cumshitter fucked around with this message at 03:07 on Dec 11, 2021

packetmantis
Feb 26, 2013
Shirt Killing

Martman
Nov 20, 2006

cumshitter posted:

Famous video game guy is the baseball player who tricked a state into giving him tons of money to make a video game isn't it?

Edit: Curt Schilling
I dunno if anyone is wishing he had finished any storylines though

Chloe Jessica
Nov 6, 2021
Pick 2.0
schilling in the name of



Boyfriend [39 M] called me [ 34 F ] a Fat, Ugly HOBO - Skip Christmas? Run screaming?

quote:

I'm not dumb, I know there will be an onslaught of people telling me to bail and leave asap.

I just want to get this off my chest so I can get some work done. BF is away with old college buddies camping this weekend and all I am doing is dwelling on his nasty verbiage he direct at me.

I keep googling "verbal abuse" and duh, of course the only answer is to leave if the abuser won't fix his attitude. But I really need some personalized advice. Help!

Lived with BF since 2011. Had dated long distance on and on from '07 ' to '09. Finally started dating seriously in '09.

Even though previous boyfriends had acted like I was the best thing since sliced bread, I got the underlying vibe that my boyfriend thought I was lucky to be with him.

I have dated some stuck up and slightly arrogant guys to be honest. What some would call Blue Bloods. Probably should have stuck with one of them in retrospect.

But Holy HeII, none of them ever once insulted my looks or earning capability.

Perhaps their lack of any insecurity adds to the mix. I was used to being told I was cool and pretty and who cared how much money I make as long as I enjoy what I'm doing. As it should be.

My current bf is (or shall I WAS since he has put on 20 pounds from drinking) very, very good looking. Like a young Elvis crossed with a actor Douglas Booth. But buffer than both. Women fall all over him still , even with weight gain. But hey I've dated other cute guys and none of them had this preening quality about their looks like he does.

To wit, on our first date, I saw his reflection before I saw him approaching me. He was grooming his hair in front of a mirrored support column in the restaurant.

Boyfriend explained his narcissism away, that he was fat and ugly with thick glasses as a kid, so he was preoccupied with his looks now, as a grown up. So I let his ongoing vibe of superiority slide. I think I found it amusing at first.

Since I lived several hours away, it made dating hard. After a year and a half, we agreed I should move close by.

I found a place and he knew I was all set to move in a month. But 2 weeks before I moved, he got squirrely.. He went radio silent. Ghosted me out of the blue.

I won't bog everything down further with details. I ended up having to move, as I already replaced myself at my old rental. No one to crash with, plus I had two dogs I refused to give up.

So I moved near him and was in shock and horror for weeks. I did not deluge him with texts. I even went on a date and talked to other guys.

But I had a huge hole in my heart and this jerk had a lot of my shoes and whatnot at his house still. Finally, I told him to simply arrange a meeting so I could get my stuff.

We met and don't ask me how but we ended up having dinner and then slowly seeing each other. In hindsight, I was so insanely desperate to hold onto him that I didn't talk about the pink elephant in the room.

I ended up moving in with him to save money and have secure place for my doggies. He owned a house so it made sense as this is one of the most expensive places in the country.

We have had stresses the last 2 years. I had been making good money and giving him enough to cover his mortgage payment every month.

He makes around 200k and doesn't ever need to stress about money.

I also had a couple health issues arising from a slight disability I have, so haven't looked or felt my best. Instead of lifting me up, he has fallen into a classic abuse pattern of raging against me for a few days and then being nice for weeks on end.

I'm well aware how unhealthy that is.

I let sunk costs influence me and my decision to keep trying with him and staying here. Plus with my dogs and the living costs here, I would be moving far away if I left. I only moved to this area for him. People joke about how nasty the people are in this area. So nothing to keep me here, besides him.

And I have spent so much time with him already that it is hard to imagine finding someone else with same interests, viewpoints, attraction level.

Since my industry has changed over the last 2 years, I have been actively learning other skills and project that this and coming years I'll have a tidy income again.
And my health is on the mend too.

But my boyfriend has not been at all positive or supportive. He acts like he has no faith me. In turn I have gone from a sweet, fun and happy chick to someone I don't know.

Which only makes his behavior worse. He started telling me how strippers have the best bodies and why am I lazy and why can't I get a body like that? [perhaps because I have a documented disability, doofus] He rebuffs my advances and always has an excuse.
I don't think he is cheating though... He would probably be more relaxed and nicer if he was!

He also complains that he doesn't want to support my "food hole" and I need to bring in a lot more money. When I get upset and tell him I am doing everything I can and things will get better, he just says something rude and pithy and walks away. I manage to contribute all I could, but he still acts angry.

Things got better for a while, but last week was his worst and most horrible blow up at me. And it was over something so stupid to boot.

I let lint fall down next to the washing machine and left a pile of my clothes sitting in the wash room. Additionally, my robe was covering his power tools. So messy, whatever. He doesn't clean the house and jokes I'm his live in maid. Again, whatever.

I had just gotten over the flu and told him I sorry things were messy.

He went wild screaming at me. He said his life was on hold and that I need to make money and I'm living in his house for so long and that he will never marry me. To top it off, he then told me I am a FAT, UGLY HOBO. He then added that he wasn't buying a Christmas tree this year for us, because "Christmas Tree are for Closers".

The most scrooge thing ever said. I am tempted to put that on a Graphic T-Shirt.

Ouch. I used to be a print model and although I'm not rail thin, no one would call me remotely huge. I used to be very successful before the hell of 2008 ravaged the economy, so calling me a HOBO was the worse part of his insults. (fat and ugly comments just make him sound insane since I know what I look like)

Then he goes back to acting normal and whenever I attempt to bring up what he said he just replies that I "set him off"

But I can't let the insults go. Here is Xmas barreling down on me and never have I dreaded it so much. How to handle this? He obviously won't change his behavior and clearly wants to end things but for some reason never does.

TL;DR Boyfriend of many years thinks he is much better than me and called me a Fat, Ugly HOBO. Skip Christmas this year?

Update: And yes he does have good qualities, so that makes it so much more painful for me. He's a very devoted son, has many old friends who adore him and is a self less animal rescuer.
So his abuse of me is made worse by his nice qualities. Ugh. FML. Update, update : Additionally, ALL of his exes think of him as so nice or too nice. He is platonic friends with a few and one has been a friend of mine for 5 years. I mean this sort of stuff hurts my brain. Why me? Why am I the ONLY person I can find who has been mistreated his way by him?

Barudak
May 7, 2007

I can't read it. I feel like a computer trying to read text with a line through it, I'm not able to make it happen, the shapes should lead to words but they don't

Chloe Jessica
Nov 6, 2021
Pick 2.0

Barudak posted:

I can't read it. I feel like a computer trying to read text with a line through it, I'm not able to make it happen, the shapes should lead to words but they don't

remember all the stories Pick used to tell about Hugh? it's that, but without the added experience of knowing for a fact that the person's entire life revolves around seeking validation from emotionally unavailable men

CommissarMega
Nov 18, 2008

THUNDERDOME LOSER

cumshitter posted:

Famous video game guy is the baseball player who tricked a state into giving him tons of money to make a video game isn't it?

Edit: Curt Schilling

As someone else said, the famous guy is probably Gabe Newell, considering the OP of that post said he met said famous guy's son at a racing event, and Gabe's son is a racecar driver.

Evil Willow
Apr 26, 2007
Bored now...
AITA for saying that repeated spoilering is grounds for divorce?

quote:

This occurred about a month or two ago. Everyone except the kids involved are in their 40s. My wife invited one of her friends along with husband and the kids. The husband and I get along pretty well because we geek out about the same type of media. I was very excited to discuss Squid Game and he seemed upset. He said that his wife spoilered the show for him so he didn't watch it. We were discussing how terrible it is and he reveals that this isn't the first time and he has asked her to stop doing spoilering before. I said something along the lines of 'Shoot, I would leave someone for that.' He became quiet after that so I changed the subject to something else.

Last week, my wife told me that her friend might be going thru a separation. I told my wife what I told the friend's husband. She got very angry and said I might have broken up their family with young children. She asked me if I would divorce her over the same issue. I said yes, if my partner can't respect me enough to follow basic common courtesy such as not spoilering. Especially when my wishes have been explicitly stated. I would divorce them even with young children. Which was clearly the wrong thing to say.

My wife does not spoiler by the way.

So AITA?

Kenshin
Jan 10, 2007

Evil Willow posted:

AITA for saying that repeated spoilering is grounds for divorce?
:murder: anyone that says it isn't

Barudak
May 7, 2007

Evil Willow posted:

AITA for saying that repeated spoilering is grounds for divorce?

I couldn't stay with someone who doesn't like whats behind the spoiler tag

Cool Dad
Jun 15, 2007

It is always Friday night, motherfuckers

I couldn't stay with anyone who calls spoiling spoilering

The Lone Badger
Sep 24, 2007

tinytort posted:

I'm assuming it's something like my ex-FIL looking for a doctor who was willing to do the surgery to remove his tumour but wouldn't require him to take pain meds or (if I remember right) be put under for it.

Someone will do it and there's always a hospital that will let them have privileges. You just have to sign a stack of waivers about three feet tall, promising that you were told this is an absolutely terrible idea and that it will result in pain and you could die.

In ex-FIL's case, there was only one doctor crazy enough to be willing to do it, because the surgery required splitting the man open and removing a large portion of his intestinal tract. Everyone else was requiring him to take painkillers.

He refused, because he's a recovered drug addict who now refuses to take anything stronger than ibuprofen.


What about argon?

Mx.
Dec 16, 2006

I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!


My mom said I won’t find a husband with the way I dress.

quote:

So basically I’m a straight 21 year old female, and I dress edgy (I.e. black, fishnets, chains). I never dress revealing, and I dress this way because I think it is pretty and cute. But my mom said to me that no guy would be seriously interested in me if I continue to dress this way. I do get lots of male attention as is, but now I’m scared she is right and I won’t be successful in serious relationships. I am only interested in serious relationships. My personality is very bubbly and I am just like other girls who dress normally. Should I dress how I want still? Do you think guys would be too intimidated by me?

TLDR: I dress edgy and my mom said I wouldn’t find a guy to marry if I continue. Is this true?

Vim Fuego
Jun 1, 2000



Ultra Carp

Barudak posted:

I can't read it. I feel like a computer trying to read text with a line through it, I'm not able to make it happen, the shapes should lead to words but they don't

pentyne
Nov 7, 2012

Mx. posted:

My mom said I won’t find a husband with the way I dress.

OP's mom is so out of touch this reminds me of the dad who was saying his furry porn artist daughter needed to get a real job.

pretty sure she was like 19 and making more then him or something.

Foo Diddley
Oct 29, 2011

cat

Mx. posted:

My mom said I won’t find a husband with the way I dress.

quote:

black, fishnets, chains

yeah, nobody wants a goth gf. you gonna end up a spinster, girl

Butter Activities
May 4, 2018

pentyne posted:

OP's mom is so out of touch this reminds me of the dad who was saying his furry porn artist daughter needed to get a real job.

pretty sure she was like 19 and making more then him or something.

Well you can’t not link it!!!

Guildenstern Mother
Mar 31, 2010

Why walk when you can ride?

Foo Diddley posted:

yeah, nobody wants a goth gf. you gonna end up a spinster, girl

Well hold on, what if she doesn't have big titties? What then?

Barudak
May 7, 2007

Guildenstern Mother posted:

Well hold on, what if she doesn't have big titties? What then?

Science may not yet have a cure for the common cold but this has been solved

Guildenstern Mother
Mar 31, 2010

Why walk when you can ride?
Priorities. :hmmyes:

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Foo Diddley
Oct 29, 2011

cat

Guildenstern Mother posted:

Well hold on, what if she doesn't have big titties? What then?

ppl like lil tiddy goth gfs too, believe it or not

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