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Volmarias posted:If you haven't bookmarked the Things I've seen at work thread, you owe it to yourself to take a look. Well I have now! Good lord that stuff looks...depressingly familiar. Anyways, someone found the damned thing and now I have pictures/screen caps. Spoilered of course since it is a sex toy:     I'm sorry I just...can't stop imagining the mental image of someone with what is basically a beanie propeller sticking out of their butt that lights up and spins with a "FWEEEEE!" noise. And I can't stop laughing at it. Even better, last night one of the younger workers (both in the sense that he's only a couple years out of highschool and in the sense of he's been here less than half the time I have) came up to me and started chatting and after a bit he brings up how yesterday he had a bunch of [political opponent] toilet paper and a "Make a copy of your/your boyfriend's dick!" kit. I'm all "Oh you sweet summer child, is that all? You're still shocked by those mundane things? Look what I saw just this week." and nearly killed him with laughter. In the meantime everything's loving chaos. Oh it's a more relaxed chaos now that we're past Black Friday and Cyber Monday, but it's endless overtime and work for them. Love listening to my manager bitch because for some reason the system "fixed a punch" for him: He's salaried so he doesn't clock in/out like us hourly workers and yet the system automatically put time punches so now he's the only manager in the building with Time Off Task that his boss is going to get on him because her boss is going to get on her for what everyone knows is a technical glitch. Watching as Operations has to learn the lesson that "No, you can't just schedule 20% more work for Smalls: there is no spare buffer space for that process, they're going literally as fast as they can and doing so shuts the building down because the sorter (the thing I maintain) instantly explodes into gridlock". And then having to force Central Flow to learn that lesson and stop bringing our building to a halt. Then there was some back-half manager trying to chew me out because I'm not fixing jams on the OTHER sorter machine right next to me. At which point I explained I'm responsible for the sorter for the entire building, not just one department, while your department has AMs (managers) from both front and back half to watch it, their PA's (assistant managers), oh and managers-in-training from a building that didn't open in time for the holidays and are basically assigned here for the duration just so Amazon has a place to put them. Last night was my overtime night and one of my buddy PAs had been moved from his usual job of tracking/clearing jams across the facility to chasing what are known as "Cold Pricklies". At Amazon, every department has a Critical Process Time (CPT) for when it Must leave the department for being On Time. We usually miss a few these post-COVID/Great Resignation time, but we try to miss as few as possible (they just get thrown on a later truck). Cold Pricklies are CPTs that we cannot miss, these are usually shipments going to places like children's hospitals that are high risk to be PR problems. Him: "Duuude, I just came from AFE1" Me: "I'm Sorry" I say as a kneejerk response from him having to visit what's generally considered the Lesser Pack Department." Him: "No you don't understand...Their quality is atrocious. An average of 54 overages* per wall**." Me: "Oh...oh poo poo...um I'm actually sorry..." *Overage: a loose item that likely belongs to another shipment that's...somewhere else. **There's 22 pack walls, each with 3 packers working out of them, in both AFE departments. So 54 x 22 = 1,188 orphaned, lost items. And the shipments requiring those items can't go out until they find said items Later: Me: "Hey man, you get get those Cold Pricklies taken care of?" Him: "YEAAAAAH!" Me: "...Even the ones in AFE1?" Him, shaking his head with a pained stare off into the distance: "Noooooo..." Me: "But...you got the ones out that would go?" Him: "YEAAAAH!"
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Dec 10, 2021 23:46
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lol Somehow, I got both Friday and Saturday schedules off. I got woken up by my phone ringing at about 6 am. I didn't answer it, but it was a supervisor trying to call me. At first I was worried that I was supposed to be in and misread the schedule, but I had no other notifications, so I figured it was a misdial. Then I got another phone call today asking if I could come in on my day off to throw UPS parcels for Sunday delivery. I said no. Of course, it just means that Sunday is going to be so much harder now. That stuff doesn't just sort itself.
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Dec 11, 2021 18:58
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So yesterday was the official 22 year anniversary of my first day at the company I work for, not that anybody else is keeping track. Today, after talking it over with my wife, I've decided to call it quits and do something else. Our business is kind of retail adjacent, so a lot of the same headaches with customers but with a lot less taking inventory or poo poo from corporate since we're kind of a mom and pop version of what we do. I typed up a crazy long post about what all has happened, which was very cathartic for me, but I don't think anybody wants to listen to the sob story of a Store Manager so suffice to say my best friend is also my boss and poo poo kinda got real when my kid was born last month. So to preserve the friendship and help the business get back on track I'm going to step away. I haven't told my boss/BFF yet, but it feels good to actually have the decision made so I can plan what happens next. Whatever I do next will not involved retail or walk-in customers I swear to loving god. At this point I'll take a poo poo tier office job if it means my weekends are my own again.
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Dec 19, 2021 09:06
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 that onion is probably like 5 inches in diameter and I keep showing it to customers lol
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Dec 20, 2021 00:49
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Large onion the size of a small watermelon.
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Dec 20, 2021 00:50
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that is very good 
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Dec 20, 2021 01:05
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Inspector 34 posted:I typed up a crazy long post about what all has happened, which was very cathartic for me, but I don't think anybody wants to listen to the sob story of a Store Manager so suffice to say my best friend is also my boss and poo poo kinda got real when my kid was born last month. So to preserve the friendship and help the business get back on track I'm going to step away. I haven't told my boss/BFF yet, but it feels good to actually have the decision made so I can plan what happens next.  I wanna read it! I'm curious about all of it. e: congrats on declaring freedom from retail(ish) work
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Dec 20, 2021 01:49
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Peak Week (minus Peak Week of Returns). Stay frosty, goons.
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Dec 20, 2021 01:57
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One of our better Sales Floor associates left us yesterday (he found a job that pays 20/hour) and our main closing manager quit a week ahead of schedule because she and another manager got into a huge fight over a bunch of petty bullshit (well-deserved, the other manager is poo poo probably because he was only working here a month in the stock-room before he got promoted 'cause he's besties with the rear end. manager). Happy Holidays to us, I guess! 
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Dec 20, 2021 02:46
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Cowslips Warren posted:Peak Week (minus Peak Week of Returns). Stay frosty, goons. I’m so glad my company adopted a blanket ‘no refunds unless the product is faulty’ policy in 2020 after all the panic buying bullshit. We’re open an extra hour mon/tues/wed this week and till midnight on Thursday; I do the closing shift Tuesday to Saturday so I’m picking up extra hours and in all honesty it’s going to make my nights easier because nobody ever seems to realise we’re gonna be open later so that extra time tends to be super quiet and we can just pootle around getting all our poo poo done in peace. Especially the midnight shift the last couple of hours we usually have like 4 people wander in tops. Then Friday we close at 6 cause the government decided last year that Christmas Eve should be a public holiday after 6pm and that most retail businesses would be required to close at 6. So I get the day off with pay. We’re closed on Christmas Day, then I get to have Tuesday off as well because Monday and Tuesday are extra public holidays that the government put in to make up for Christmas and Boxing Day being on a weekend.
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Dec 20, 2021 03:17
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GOD IS BED posted:
Let me just say first off that I completely accept and own the fact that I have done a terrible job over the last 6-8 months or so. Our staff sucks, but it's my responsibility to train them and enforce policy, so that's on me. Our building sucks, signs are peeling, there are broken things that should not be broken, the place is not as clean as it needs to be (also part of the staff situation), that stuff is all on me too. It's literally my job to take care of these things and I haven't. Or at least not to a satisfactory level. My main reason for leaving is that I just don't have the motivation or even ability to do some of these core functions of the job anymore. I don't want to babysit high school kids, but there's no way I can convince the owner or GM to hire more than like $0.50 above minimum wage so high school kids is just what we're going to get. I don't want to continually deal with our lovely building/facilities but spending money is taboo for some reason. I also cannot continue to be on call 24/7 for every problem that arises. I'm pushing 40 and make less than $60k/year with no retirement or benefits and for a long time I've just been ok with it for a variety of reasons. First and foremost it's easier to stay put than it is to make change. I also really value the friendship I have with my GM and me being in my role enables him to spend time with his family and deal with all the other bullshit he deals with. And for over a decade now the possibility of ownership has been dangled by the owner, feeling more and more like a carrot on a stick. The owner is on year 15 of a 5 year retirement plan. Initially the plan was to open a 3rd or 4th facility and then he would "retire" and we would take over as owners and operators of the business and pay him with the company's profits. This never made much sense to me since he's not really ever been actively involved in the running of the business, so why on Earth would he just up and decide to start handing over a few percent of the business to us out of the blue? Well that didn't matter as it turns out. We did open a 3rd facility (which resulted in my taking over as SM at the 2nd one), but that failed spectacularly after a year or two. So back to 2 locations and the owner's retirement plans go on hold. For a long time we were the only show in town for our particular industry and were doing pretty well, so the owner starts talking retirement again. And it still didn't make any sense why he would. But a few years ago we actually had some competition open up and revenue dropped so that whole retirement plan didn't matter anyway. Then COVID hits and we closed for a few months. We worked pretty hard on improving the building and reopened better than ever! But that knocks the retirement plan back again. This year we've reached about 75% of our peak from pre-COVID pre-competition revenue and the retirement plan comes up again. This time he's going to redo the LLC and gift me, the GM, and my 1st location counterpart some percentage of the business to kickstart the retirement process. That was in March. Nothing has come of it so far other than some frustrating dealings with a lawyer trying to structure the LLC how we want/need it. Last month our first child was born and I've been mostly absent from work. All the bullshit that I've handled personally has fallen on other shoulders and everybody is pissed off. How could I let it get so bad? How could I let this thing or that thing go undone? Each of the 5 times I've actually gone to work have been just hours and hours of being told all the ways that I've failed. And I don't actually disagree. But I'm tired of hearing it. Oh, and why am I slow to respond to texts now? Why aren't I answering the phone all the time? Motherfuckers I'm trying to figure out how to be a parent! I cannot and will not be available as much as I was before! Oh, and the LLC thing is no longer feasible for vague reasons. Now it's a plan to do some kind of profit share. The owner wants us all to have our houses paid off within 5 years. Cool, there's no way to raise our starting wage and attract better employees, but somehow he's going to pay off our houses. What the gently caress? I have no motivation to do the functions of my job. All the talk of ownership or profit share or whatever is just a carrot on a stick. I've known that for a long time. But I could at least pretend it was real and use that to motivate myself. Not anymore. My wife being pregnant already had me thinking about the future and what I need to do to support her and our family and everything that's happened since our kid was born has just made it obvious that I need to make a change. I just can't keep chasing the carrot. It's time to move on. What I'm hoping to do is take the next 3-6 months documenting processes and training a couple people to take over my responsibilities and then be done. If the GM weren't also my best friend and I didn't have the love I do for their family I would just be done today. I want to try and make sure the transition goes as smoothly as possible. This will also allow me to continue earning a paycheck while I figure out what I want to do next. Mrs 34 wants me to think about becoming an actuary. Maybe I'll do that.
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Dec 20, 2021 04:38
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The Store Manager position is a massive trap specifically designed to be almost impossible to escape from (because it completely devours your life and pays juuuust enough that there's no other job on earth that pays as much that a retail lifer is remotely qualified for. So you're stuck.) You are of course correct that the owner is never going anywhere until he dies or gets so senile his heirs take control and wreck or sell the company. I've seen that exact "oh I'm definitely retiring Real Soon Now oh wait no actually I'm a huge workaholic and/or don't know what to do with myself if I'm not micromanaging people all day" routine several times over the years.* Are you familiar with the qualifications required to get a job as an actuary? Do you have a feasible plan to get them? Is it possible to do so without going so far into debt that it's unlikely you'll be able to dig all the way out of it by the time you're 65? I know that last one is a depressing question but you've got to be as specific as possible, with as many solid numbers as possible, if you're going to make a plan to Escape loving Retail that will work. Congrats on parenthood! Your family is and will always be the most important thing, gently caress anyone who tries to guilt trip you for that. ---------------------------- * (Most memorably one woman who started managing a restaurant in 1986. The first of her four (to date) "retirements" was in 2008. All of them have lasted less than a year and by the third time it became clear that her replacements (all chosen more or less by her) were chosen to fail and set up to fail. I don't know but I think it's a pretty safe bet she has dramatically increased her salary by repeatedly coming back from "retirement".) Eric the Mauve fucked around with this message at 04:53 on Dec 20, 2021 |
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Dec 20, 2021 04:49
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I've got an engineering degree and have always been really good at taking tests. My wife is part owner of an actuarial firm (which I will NOT be working for) and seems to think that that's good enough. Her familiarity with the field is why she thinks I'd be good at it. I know study materials can get expensive but she may be able to just borrow some from her business. Tests would come out of pocket though but I've got enough of a buffer in my savings to not have to dip into the emergency fund. The actual job sounds kind of monotonous but I'll take that if it means my off time is my own and there are retirement benefits to gain.Z edit: I did almost escape back in 2007 but I was a fool and didn't give it a real shot. Inspector 34 fucked around with this message at 05:08 on Dec 20, 2021 |
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Dec 20, 2021 05:02
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Inspector 34 posted:I've got an engineering degree and have always been really good at taking tests. My wife is part owner of an actuarial firm (which I will NOT be working for) and seems to think that that's good enough. Her familiarity with the field is why she thinks I'd be good at it. I know study materials can get expensive but she may be able to just borrow some from her business. Tests would come out of pocket though but I've got enough of a buffer in my savings to not have to dip into the emergency fund. Hospitality worker that switched and became an actuary here. The main study material I used for the first exam was a free textbook and 30 day access to a testing prep service, passed the first four exams on my first try and was hired as an actuary after passing my second one. It depends on the firm. Some of my coworkers (who also switched later in life - seems to be a thing) worked at big firms that they basically spent all day taking excel sheet one and putting it into excel sheet two, but I work at a much smaller insurer and we do pretty much everything in our team so there’s a lot more variety. I’m in the same boat too. Engineering degree, really good at taking tests. Passed the first four exams on the first try and once you get your first job most reputable employers will pay for all of your study materials and test fees at least for the first try.
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Dec 20, 2021 06:50
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Oh cool! How strange to find someone with such a similar experience, that's one of the things I love about these forums. What you said lines up pretty well with what my wife's company does as far as testing and whatnot. I don't know for sure that's the path I'll take but it's comforting to know it's there and achievable from my current situation.
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Dec 20, 2021 07:10
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The OP of the actuary thread seems to still post, might be worth checking in there even though it's kinda dead.
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Dec 20, 2021 07:36
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Eric the Mauve posted:because it completely devours your life and pays juuuust enough that there's no other job on earth that pays as much that a retail lifer is remotely qualified for. So you're stuck. But enough about the United States Postal Service
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Dec 20, 2021 14:51
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I once aspired to be a store manager at Dollar Tree because I thought I could do the job and do it well. Then, one night, I was closing with the SM and went to the liquor store on break to pick up a six-pack for after work. He asked me to pick up a can of Foster's for him and I was shocked when he proceeded to pop that fucker and drink it right in the office after the store closed. He talked to me for a while, and I started to feel iffy about my goals. Then he went off on the DM and got canned a week or two later. I saw first-hand what being a corporate store manager will do to a guy and put it out of my mind. I quit a few months later, after his replacement threatened my job after loving with the posted schedule and trying to force me in on my day off. She was new to the company and wanted to ingratiate herself with the DM in any way possible. I forgot that all a few years later when I was at Subway. I'd be closing with one other person when the SM would come in on Wednesday nights to do inventory. At midnight. This kid was younger than me without a family - how the gently caress am I gonna do that poo poo with a family? Now, I work the office side in construction, with experience in the retail side of the particular branch I do most of my work for as well. Would I love the title of Branch Manager? gently caress yeah. But my mother is my boss and the manager of this branch, and it falls apart without her. It's been that way for twenty years, before she was given the title and the pay commensurate with her actual job of running the branch. She gets paid something like $65k-$75k a year, works at least 60 hours a week between the office and home. Maybe more. At the low end she makes a couple dollars an hour more than I do, without getting paid for the overtime. I have seen, since the parent company bought us, what she does day in and day out. I have trained in several of these things and am training for more now because the CFO personally wants me to. I'm good at my job and I curse it more and more. I truly don't know, with the way this company treats its general managers, if I want that for myself. I can't sit here making $19.25 an hour for the rest of my life, but I have such a specific skillset that I don't know how to  the gently caress out even if I wanted to.(Did not mean to brain-dump like that, woof.) Inspector 34 posted:Oh cool! How strange to find someone with such a similar experience, that's one of the things I love about these forums. What you said lines up pretty well with what my wife's company does as far as testing and whatnot. I don't know for sure that's the path I'll take but it's comforting to know it's there and achievable from my current situation. You loving do you. If that's what you need to do, get the gently caress out of the business. You've been doing it since you were in high school from the sounds of it, and retail is a loving soul destroyer. I haven't been to the office but 3 times in the past 2 years and I've never been happier. I haven't spoken to a customer in all that time, and I'm fully remote. There is something better for you out there. I truly hope you find it and keep us apprised, because we all love a good story.
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Dec 20, 2021 17:49
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Some lady came in the other day and caused a scene because the deli didn't make her catering order, claiming she paid for it and everything. She had no receipt, but what she did have was an order form... dated 2018. The deli manager and front end manager just kinda scoffed and told her she was out of luck and would get nothing.
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Dec 20, 2021 19:29
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Seeing a customer get what they deserve is the one good thing about working retail. It's definitely not worth putting up with all the other bullshit, but it's very satisfying to see and I wish it happened more often.
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Dec 20, 2021 19:51
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And then there's when I nudged my coworker at Safeway, pointed out my wife's ex-husband and his girlfriend over at the prepackaged deli case and watched them spend, I kid you not, 20-30 minutes going through all the packages. I told my coworker he was looking for out of date items (my wife was with the guy 8 years, I knew his bullshit) and sure as poo poo, he came over with seven containers of microwave chicken teriyaki and set them down. They were, I poo poo you not, less than an hour out of date (because the expiry labels were timestamped for some reason). Got a 50% discount on them because he was technically right. I wanted to loving scream, I hate that Timmy Technicality bullshit.
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Dec 20, 2021 19:57
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"You just don't seem like you care" You're right sir, I don't care. You, not I, ordered the wrong tires for your vehicle, but somehow it's my problem that you waited until the week before Christmas to take care of your bald tires. Best I can do is place an order for the correct tires and call you when they're here. Luckily my boss is just as out of fucks to give as I am. Our catch phrase all weekend in the shop has been "you just don't seem like you care!"
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Dec 20, 2021 21:16
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D34THROW posted:And then there's when I nudged my coworker at Safeway, pointed out my wife's ex-husband and his girlfriend over at the prepackaged deli case and watched them spend, I kid you not, 20-30 minutes going through all the packages. "Wow, thank you for bringing the expired items to our attention, sir. I'm afraid we can't let you buy expired food items, though, out of concern for your safety. But I want you to know that you have our deepest thanks."
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Dec 21, 2021 01:42
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yeah I usually say, "I can't sell that" and if someone makes a stink it's not like I can get in trouble or anything.
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Dec 21, 2021 02:32
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D34THROW posted:And then there's when I nudged my coworker at Safeway, pointed out my wife's ex-husband and his girlfriend over at the prepackaged deli case and watched them spend, I kid you not, 20-30 minutes going through all the packages. I’m surprised you were allowed to sell them. I get customers all the time trying that on me and I thank them for bringing the items to my attention and then toss them out right away. It’s so satisfying to watch their reaction to all the time they spent hunting go to waste.
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Dec 21, 2021 04:36
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if I can't get my dumbass 21 year old libertarian chud coworker to stop saying "deus vult" and"purge the xeno" I'm worried that I'll have to throw a loving butternut squash at his face
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Dec 21, 2021 04:50
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Tell him that Stellaris still isn't good and to play a different game.
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Dec 21, 2021 04:57
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I'll pointedly ask him if he knows why people hate Harry Potter fans.
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Dec 21, 2021 05:17
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Rainbow Knight posted:if I can't get my dumbass 21 year old libertarian chud coworker to stop saying "deus vult" and"purge the xeno" I'm worried that I'll have to throw a loving butternut squash at his face Ask him if he realizes that the imperium is specifically supposed to be a dystopian future, not something to look forward to. Though to be fair, the 40k Thought For The Day list is probably pretty on brand for him Also, I'd say "Ask his thoughts on The Children's Crusade" but it's very possible that he would be all for selling children into slavery.
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Dec 21, 2021 05:44
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Volmarias posted:Ask him if he realizes that the imperium is specifically supposed to be a dystopian future, not something to look forward to. Though to be fair, the 40k Thought For The Day list is probably pretty on brand for him Yeah today I asked him if he remembered that there are no good guys in WH40k. He knows, but he's just a loving moron contrarian. As far as selling children into slavery, I don't think he's there yet but it's just a matter of time with the terminally online alt-right gamer.
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Dec 21, 2021 06:50
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120 tickets dropped all at once halfway through the shift. I'd explain what that means in Amazon inbound problem solve terms but I'm tired and I'll just say that in a normal day the ticket queue generally isn't above 20 tickets for us.
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Dec 21, 2021 13:04
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Toraen posted:120 tickets dropped all at once halfway through the shift. All I'm gonna say, as this this thread's most visible Amazon rear end-Ociate is... Sounds about right for Peak.  In outbound at my place end of shift ended with the router in FULL gridlock and there was a heavily leaking tote just sitting on one of the lines from RSP. By the time I got a stepladder over the line had moved a good 30 feet, putting in the place where our repair crew stores a bunch of crap and I wasn't going to chase it with less than 10 minutes until end of shift.
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Dec 21, 2021 13:39
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The Lord Bude posted:I’m surprised you were allowed to sell them. I get customers all the time trying that on me and I thank them for bringing the items to my attention and then toss them out right away. It’s so satisfying to watch their reaction to all the time they spent hunting go to waste. Rainbow Knight posted:yeah I usually say, "I can't sell that" and if someone makes a stink it's not like I can get in trouble or anything. Shift "rank" went by seniority, the other closer that night had several years on me so I was overridden when I pretty much said that to her. I think it was some screwy policy or she didn't give enough of a poo poo or something. Surprisingly he did not recognize me some months later when we were moving and he came to pick up an old shelf of his that we still had for some drat reason.
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Dec 21, 2021 17:48
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D34THROW posted:Shift "rank" went by seniority, the other closer that night had several years on me so I was overridden when I pretty much said that to her. I think it was some screwy policy or she didn't give enough of a poo poo or something. pardon my complete ignorance here, but: why does it matter? is it just that these customers are super annoying getting in your way for ages digging around looking for old dates and messing up the display? are you penalised in some way if stock goes a minute out of date without having been thrown out? are you paid less if they buy teriyaki chicken at a discount?
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Dec 21, 2021 18:24
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Definitely a liability issue if somebody gets sick eating stock you had on the shelf that was out of date but that's an Owner Problem if I ever heard one when the customer is actively seeking it out. Basic compassion to not sell people things that get them sick.
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Dec 21, 2021 18:26
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gegi posted:pardon my complete ignorance here, but: why does it matter? is it just that these customers are super annoying getting in your way for ages digging around looking for old dates and messing up the display? It's about the kind of people they invariably are. The people that have nothing better to do than go through the whole loving store hunting for a few out-of-date items are incessantly annoying in a hundred ways and treat retail workers with not a scant trace of basic human dignity.
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Dec 21, 2021 18:38
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Yeah any time you can deny people like that what they want and get them out of the store empty handed it's a massive win.
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Dec 21, 2021 18:45
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gegi posted:pardon my complete ignorance here, but: why does it matter? is it just that these customers are super annoying getting in your way for ages digging around looking for old dates and messing up the display? I would presume some sort of liability issue gets introduced that would typically prompt a store to not sell out of date items. He eats out-of-hour chicken teriyaki meal, sues Safeway when he gets sick, store settles just to avoid having to take it to an actual trial and risk losing on a weird jury or something. This was $ex_husband's MO, to be honest. He was the type to try to haggle every last little concession out of anyone ever, to the point of embarrassing my wife on multiple occasions because who wants to be eating with the guy who goes "So I know the menu says soup or salad, but can I do like half a cup of soup and half a salad? Are the unlimited breadsticks really unlimited and I can take home a few dozen?" and poo poo like that.
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Dec 21, 2021 19:32
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I will never quite understand why no business aggressively chases "customers" like that off to go be their competitors' problem, and focuses its attention on delivering service to Normal Customers.
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Dec 21, 2021 19:34
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Eric the Mauve posted:I will never quite understand why no business aggressively chases "customers" like that off to go be their competitors' problem, and focuses its attention on delivering service to Normal Customers. Because more often than not those lovely customers do end up spending money. Like, if someone spends $100 a week at a store, it's worth it to give them $20 worth of discounts or free stuff or whatever.
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Dec 21, 2021 19:46
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