r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

Butter Activities: May 4, 2018

Huh where did my contest loser avatar go

gently caress that was a terrible snipe heres my penance

quote:

AITA for uninviting my transgender sister to my wedding? (self.AmItheAsshole)
submitted 4 hours ago * by Ill-Yoghurt-48232& 8 more
Some background: I have a trans sister came out to us around a year ago but had been on hormones for longer and hid it from us until she had moved out into her own place, probably because our parents are very conservative and known to be transphobic. As a result, there was this huge fight and a ton of people in our family (including our parents) cut her off and don't talk to her anymore.
I like to think I've been pretty supportive of her so far, using her pronouns and her name and all that (which has been hard, considering our fam gives me poo poo for doing so). I even make it a point to visit her every so often, while she hasn't seen most of our other family since last year. I also promised her that, if and when I got married in the future, she'd still be invited despite any tension with our family.
Me and my fianc� got engaged a while back. My parents (especially my dad) absolutely adore this guy, and since my sister came out, they've almost seen him as the substitute son. Almost as a result, he's definitely more on their side of the situation, and he's made it clear he doesn't really agree with, or like, my sister all that much.
After the proposal (which was very elaborate and surprising and orchestrated by my parents), my parents, who are wedding planners, started talking with me about planning the big day and even offered to pay for everything. I mentioned wanting to invite my sister, and they shut the idea down immediately, talking about how she disrespected the family and cut them off and all that. They basically gave me an ultimatum: have my wedding planned and paid for by them or have my sister there and they don't come at all.
I took my parents' offer, because I can't really afford to pay for an entire wedding and because my fianc� pressured me to accept it. I broke the news to my sister, and she's very understandably upset, but I'm still inviting her to a smaller afterparty over Zoom so we can still be together on the big day. I still feel really guilty about this, though, so, Reddit, AITA?
EDIT: I don't think I made it clear enough how overbearing my parents are. Just saying "no" to them wasn't really an option for me, and if I'd declined their offer, they simply wouldn't have come to whatever smaller wedding I managed to plan, which would have been even worse.
EDIT: I'm going to turn off notifications for this post because people keep misconstruing my position and ignoring how difficult of a position I'm in. I hope you all are happy.

Wow what a title I wonder what the twist is wait no it�s just bad.

Butter Activities fucked around with this message at 21:53 on Dec 28, 2021

# ? Dec 28, 2021 21:50

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# ? May 28, 2024 03:11

Breetai: Nov 6, 2005; 🥄Mah spoon is too big!🍌

My boss told me not to hang a poster of a convicted BJJ child rapist in the background during zoom calls, aita?

# ? Dec 28, 2021 21:54

CharlestheHammer: Jun 26, 2011; YOU SAY MY POSTS ARE THE RAVINGS OF THE DUMBEST PERSON ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH BUT YOU YOURSELF ARE READING THEM. CURIOUS!

Breetai posted:

My boss told me not to hang a poster of a convicted BJJ child rapist in the background during zoom calls, aita?

What if he told you you have to have that poster for a professional work environment.

The bootlickes inthis thread gonna have a rough time

# ? Dec 28, 2021 22:03

teen witch: Oct 9, 2012

Hi hello teen witch here, attempting to go back to Sweden from Lon Gisland! This means I�ll be kind of out of reach for the next day or so, so I�ll preemptively post the following for all y�dumbass squabbles, Frank Reynolds inclusive:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yqTjKhYh4fs

Kindly ensure that I don�t come back to some relentlessly stupid bullshit. I promise you, you will want to be very sure that it doesn�t happen.

Best
TW

# ? Dec 28, 2021 22:07

limp_cheese: Sep 10, 2007; Nothing to see here. Move along.

SMEGMA_MAIL posted:

AITA for uninviting my transgender sister to my wedding? (self.AmItheAsshole)

I hope she is happy with her choice because her sister is now gone.

Also tell me you are a bigot without telling me you are a bigot.

# ? Dec 28, 2021 22:11

Butter Activities: May 4, 2018

limp_cheese posted:

I hope she is happy with her choice because her sister is now gone.

Also tell me you are a bigot without telling me you are a bigot.

No you she she�s very supportive because she occasionally doesn�t misgender her or unperson her.

# ? Dec 28, 2021 22:12

Nae: Sep 3, 2020; what.

SMEGMA_MAIL posted:

No you she she�s very supportive because she occasionally doesn�t misgender her or unperson her.

She said it was hard, okay?????!!?

# ? Dec 28, 2021 22:15

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

SMEGMA_MAIL posted:

Huh where did my contest loser avatar go

gently caress that was a terrible snipe heres my penance

Wow what a title I wonder what the twist is wait no it�s just bad.

"I'm in such a hard position!! I had to choose between a huge lavish ridiculous wedding where I can be a princess for a day or my sister. Why won't anyone feel sorry for me

"

Here's a nice one:

Want to ask my friend [19F] out, now that she�s a girl, but worried I�ll [20M] hurt her feelings.

quote:

Players involved are me, 20M, and Violet, 19F.

So, my friend Violet started transitioning at the very beginning of the first lockdown. She told all of us in a close knit friend group about her name, pronouns, etc, and we all had a mini-discord party for her to celebrate.

We�ve kept in touch through lockdown via discord, and multiplayer games, but we�re not really the webcam kind, so we�ve not seen each other�s faces in a while. One of my friends pointed this out, and we all had a night where we got on camera to hang out.

Guys. She�s stunning. I hadn�t seen her since she was still going by her deadname, and by her own admission, she never cared about how she looked then. Now that she can be her real self, she looks incredible. She has her hair styled, and makeup, and got her ears pierced. I think she�s started waxing her eyebrows? She�s also my �type� � dark hair, 50s style rockabilly, with plans for piercings and tattoos once lockdown is over.

So I stared at her like a lunatic for a good five minutes and had to pretend my camera had frozen.

Anyway, here�s the issue. A couple years ago, before she transitioned, Violet asked me out. I turned her down, because I�m straight (I�m pretty ambiguous looking, a lot of people think I�m gay?), and she was kind of hurt by it. We agreed to still be friends, and we are. She�s probably my best friend in the world. She took a little break from the group while her feelings were still raw, but when she came back, it was all fine.

And now I want to ask her out. But I really don�t know how, or whether I even should? It�s not just about her looks, by the way. Since she transitioned, she�s so happy, and just being around her makes me grin like a dumbass. She�s already super smart and kind. I�m just worried that she�ll think I only care about her looks, since I didn�t want to date her while she was presenting as a dude? I don�t know how to explain that she�s like a totally different person, being allowed to be who she always really was? And I guess if I�m honest, some of it is about her looks, because if it wasn�t, I�d have been interested in her when she was still presenting as male? I�m super confused, and could use some advise.

Bottom line is, whatever happens, I don't want to make things awkward for Violet. She's got enough going on as it is without me making it worse.

TLDR: Friend asked me out before she transitioned, I said no. She's transitioned, and I want to ask her out. I am dumb. Help me.

# ? Dec 28, 2021 22:17

SirSamVimes: Jul 21, 2008; ~* Challenge *~

limp_cheese posted:

I hope she is happy with her choice because her sister is now gone.

Also tell me you are a bigot without telling me you are a bigot.

Sounds more like they're greedy than bigoted. lovely person either way though.

# ? Dec 28, 2021 22:19

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

Zulily Zoetrope posted:

I feel like being the Child Rapist Dojo ought to be a comparable scenario. I for one would cancel my membership tout de suite.

Sadly, there are gyms where the coaches have been convicted in sex crimes that still manage to stay in business. Not exactly a model to aspire to, though.

SMEGMA_MAIL posted:

AITA for uninviting my transgender sister to my wedding?

they simply wouldn't have come to whatever smaller wedding I managed to plan, which would have been even worse.

Oh noooooo, your transphobe parents won�t come to your wedding. So much worse than having your sister there.

# ? Dec 28, 2021 22:19

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

Sisal Two-Step posted:

"I'm in such a hard position!! I had to choose between a huge lavish ridiculous wedding where I can be a princess for a day or my sister. Why won't anyone feel sorry for me "

And you know that in a few months or years when she tries to reconnect with her sister the line will be "It was just a wedding!"

# ? Dec 28, 2021 22:20

Rust Martialis: May 8, 2007; At night, Bavovnyatko quietly comes to the occupiers’ bases, depots, airfields, oil refineries and other places full of flammable items and starts playing with fire there

teen witch posted:

Hi hello teen witch here, attempting to go back to Sweden from Lon Gisland! This means I’ll be kind of out of reach for the next day or so, so I’ll preemptively post the following for all y’dumbass squabbles, Frank Reynolds inclusive:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yqTjKhYh4fs

Kindly ensure that I don’t come back to some relentlessly stupid bullshit. I promise you, you will want to be very sure that it doesn’t happen.

Best
TW

I'd offer to say hi if you're passing thru Kastrup Airport but you know, COVID.

# ? Dec 28, 2021 22:20

LanceHunter: Nov 12, 2016; Beautiful People Club

kimbo305 posted:

Sadly, there are gyms where the coaches have been convicted in sex crimes that still manage to stay in business. Not exactly a model to aspire to, though.

Oh noooooo, your transphobe parents won�t come to your wedding. So much worse than having your sister there.

your transphobe parents won�t come to your wedding to your transphobe fianc�

# ? Dec 28, 2021 22:30

Foo Diddley: Oct 29, 2011; cat

teen witch posted:

Hi hello teen witch here, attempting to go back to Sweden from Lon Gisland! This means I�ll be kind of out of reach for the next day or so, so I�ll preemptively post the following for all y�dumbass squabbles, Frank Reynolds inclusive:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yqTjKhYh4fs

Kindly ensure that I don�t come back to some relentlessly stupid bullshit. I promise you, you will want to be very sure that it doesn�t happen.

Best
TW

we love u teen witch! happy holidays!

# ? Dec 28, 2021 22:33

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

LanceHunter posted:

your transphobe parents won�t come to your wedding to your transphobe fianc�

You know what, spring for the big fancy wedding, just hire me as the pyrotechnics coordinator.

# ? Dec 28, 2021 22:34

DAD LOST MY IPOD: Feb 3, 2012; Fats Dominar is on the case

Sisal Two-Step posted:

"I'm in such a hard position!! I had to choose between a huge lavish ridiculous wedding where I can be a princess for a day or my sister. Why won't anyone feel sorry for me "

Here's a nice one:

Want to ask my friend [19F] out, now that she�s a girl, but worried I�ll [20M] hurt her feelings.

seems like op is overthinking it. he is straight and was therefore not attracted to a male presenting friend, but is attracted to that friend when female presenting. that�s what being straight means. if anything seems like friend would feel very validated by this vivid illustration of the success of her transition?

# ? Dec 28, 2021 22:35

Chaotic Flame: Jun 1, 2009; So...

DAD LOST MY IPOD posted:

seems like op is overthinking it. he is straight and was therefore not attracted to a male presenting friend, but is attracted to that friend when female presenting. that’s what being straight means. if anything seems like friend would feel very validated by this vivid illustration of the success of her transition?

But brains and feelings are weird and I could see the friend still being hurt from before. Really hope this has a happy update later though. :ohdear:

Chaotic Flame fucked around with this message at 22:48 on Dec 28, 2021

# ? Dec 28, 2021 22:37

Arsenic Lupin: Apr 12, 2012; This particularly rapid💨 unintelligible 😖patter💁 isn't generally heard🧏‍♂️, and if it is🤔, it doesn't matter💁.

Uncle Enzo posted:

"Yes you did get the majority of the questions correct, especially the longer, harder ones. BUT on #17 you selected option "C" which was to wager half your cumulative score on the answer to question #23. And you answered the question, BUT as clearly spelled out in the syllabus, any question numbered 22 or higher needs to be answered in opposite fashion. Not to mention you answered "True" to question number 11, which had stated that question sorry had to be answered using ONLY "T" or "F". It's not my fault you can't follow instructions."

I took an honors logic class in college. The midterm consisted of a short set of true/false questions (for instance, "Is this set decidable?") For each question, you had to answer "Sure" or "Unsure" as well as your answer to the question. If you were correct and sure you got 5 points; correct and unsure you got 3; incorrect and unsure you got 0; incorrect and sure you got -N (I have forgotten what N was, it's been years.)

I blew the doors off the rest of the class because I wasn't sure about anything, and if you have taken advanced mathematical logic, neither would you be. Everybody else in the class was sure all the time.

There was such an uproar that the professor recorded both the raw scores and his magically-altered scores for the test, and my moment of glory faded. I was unsure but wrong a fair bit.

# ? Dec 28, 2021 22:39

Butter Activities: May 4, 2018

Chaotic Flame posted:

But brains and feelings are weird and I could see the friend still being hurt from before. Really hope this has a happy update later though.

Yeah I could definitely see it going bad depending on how it comes across and where she is mentally. I really hope not though it�s a very adorable story.

# ? Dec 28, 2021 22:57

Seth Pecksniff: May 27, 2004; can't believe shrek is fucking dead. rip to a real one.

teen witch gone let's start a pointless derail for her to read for after she lands

# ? Dec 28, 2021 23:15

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

What the gently caress do you think the star next to my username means?

# ? Dec 28, 2021 23:17

Seth Pecksniff: May 27, 2004; can't believe shrek is fucking dead. rip to a real one.

Pope Corky the IX posted:

What the gently caress do you think the star next to my username means?

you have to sleep sometime my dude :twisted:

# ? Dec 28, 2021 23:17

Chloe Jessica: Nov 6, 2021; Pick 2.0

Pope Corky the IX posted:

What the gently caress do you think the star next to my username means?

that you're a teacher's pet

# ? Dec 28, 2021 23:19

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

Chloe Jessica posted:

that you're a teacher's pet

No, that's the star on my rear end.

# ? Dec 28, 2021 23:20

Nooner: Mar 26, 2011; AN A+ OPSTER (:

Pope Corky the IX posted:

What the gently caress do you think the star next to my username means?

Dont speak to this user without an adult present

# ? Dec 28, 2021 23:20

Arzachel: May 12, 2012

SMEGMA_MAIL posted:

Yeah I could definitely see it going bad depending on how it comes across and where she is mentally. I really hope not though it�s a very adorable story.

I took a peek at the comments and it looks like they're dating :3:

Seth Pecksniff posted:

teen witch gone let's start a pointless derail for her to read for after she lands

What if the cardboard cutout Danny DeVito is pissing on a shed

# ? Dec 28, 2021 23:20

Chloe Jessica: Nov 6, 2021; Pick 2.0

AITA for having a school bus stop changed?

quote:

We moved into our new house last year. When we purchased it, the Realtor informed us that there was a school bus stop on the corner where the house was, and we were okay with that, thinking that it would not be an issue. We moved in over the summer before school started.

The week that school began, we had no issues, however, in the following weeks, we noticed that our dog and cat started behaving strangely. My cat starting urinating outside the litter box and the dog would not go near the windows in the front. We took the cat to the vet to make sure that she was not sick, and she was fine. The vet thought that it was the move and the new environment causing anxiety for them.

Two weeks later, we started noticing that rocks from our landscaping out front were on the porch and footprints on the cement. Out of concern, we installed a video doorbell camera because we were afraid that someone was trying to get into the house. What we saw was the kids from the bus stop, taking our landscaping rocks and throwing them at our house and windows and scaring the crap out of my dog and cat. They would run up to the windows and start yelling at them. To say I was pissed was an understatement. Meanwhile, these kids parents were either standing there watching them do this, or sitting in their car (they drive kids to the bus stop and then wait in their cars until they get on the bus) and literally doing nothing. One mother even told her kid to go on the porch to get out of the sun. These kids were at least 10-12 years old so they are old enough to know better.

My husband called the school as soon as he saw it and reported it. They basically told us they couldn't do anything about it. So he called the board of education and was given the run around there as well. We started watching the cameras like hawks every morning and any time we saw a kid pick up the rocks we would tell them we could see them and put it down. When the parents would tell the kids to go on the porch, we would talk through the cameras and tell them no, they would either have to wait in the car or stand in the rain. We finally went to a board of education meeting and showed them the camera footage of the kids tormenting our animals. We basically said that they either change the bus stop or we file police reports on every kid on the camera who continues to throw rocks at our house and yell at our animals.

The school board voted in our favor to change the bus stop to further up the street, meaning that kids and parents would have to go an extra block to go on the bus. Now all the parents from the bus stop are pissed at us and saying we doctored the footage. They are all saying how much of an inconvenience this is for them. We would not have asked to change the bus stop if these kids did not do what they did to the dog and the cat.

AITA for having the bus stop changed?

# ? Dec 28, 2021 23:23

Butter Activities: May 4, 2018

Chloe Jessica posted:

AITA for having a school bus stop changed?

drat 100% on the NIMBY�s side here

# ? Dec 28, 2021 23:25

bird with big dick: Oct 21, 2015

Zulily Zoetrope posted:

Child Rapist Dojo

One of Frank�s less successful business ventures.

# ? Dec 28, 2021 23:27

teen witch: Oct 9, 2012

Rust Martialis posted:

I'd offer to say hi if you're passing thru Kastrup Airport but you know, COVID.

In what world would I ever tread onto that potato country, instead of staying in my potato country. Plus I�m transferring in KEF.

Chloe Jessica posted:

AITA for having a school bus stop changed?

Don�t go to the police - go to the media. Release the footage.

# ? Dec 28, 2021 23:30

Hughlander: May 11, 2005

AITA for calling my wife a cheapskate for giving our kids used Christmas gifts?

quote:

I(46M) and my wife(45F) have two kids together. Our daughter is 11F and my son turned 12 in December. My wife lost her job due to everything that happened this past year and has become very frugal with spending. I do have a very successful job that helps pays the bills and food. We were planning on taking a trip to visit family for Christmas, but my wife voted against the idea as it would be too expensive.

This Christmas, we had a budge for our kids being $75 each to spend on them and then $50 to spend on each other. I went out and bought the kids most of the items that they wanted on their list. When I showed my wife, she was not thrilled and told me that she would take care of the shopping. I went out and bought my wife a few gifts while staying in the budget.

When our kids went to open our gifts, I was looking forward to seeing them with huge smiles on their face. My daughter opened her gifts and looked at us saying none of this stuff was on the list. My son opened his gifts and stormed up to his room. Both kids had gotten old broken toys, shampoo, toothpaste, toothbrushes, things that no kid wants. When the kids were out of the room, I turned to my wife and say you returned all the gifts that I had bought that were on the list and stayed within the budget. You couldn't stop being a cheapskate for one day.

She looked at me and told me that she would be spending the day with her family alone. She left and hasn't spoken to me since. I cooked the kids a wonderful dinner and heard from my wife that she would be staying with her family for a few days.

AITA for calling my wife a cheapskate for giving our kids used Christmas gifts?

# ? Dec 29, 2021 00:07

B-Rock452: Jan 6, 2005

SMEGMA_MAIL posted:

drat 100% on the NIMBY�s side here

Yeah I was one hundred percent against the person just based on the title but as I read just I kept getting impressed by how they actually handled things without resorting to throwing rocks at the parents.

# ? Dec 29, 2021 00:11

Seth Pecksniff: May 27, 2004; can't believe shrek is fucking dead. rip to a real one.

Nooner posted:

Dont speak to this user without an adult present

Lmfao

Nooner done it again!

# ? Dec 29, 2021 00:13

Zulily Zoetrope: Jun 1, 2011; Muldoon

SMEGMA_MAIL posted:

AITA for uninviting my transgender sister to my wedding?

At least the rest of the family was honest and cut off the trans sister right away. OP pretended to be supportive right up until it became inconvenient, happily got engaged to a transphobe, and made an explicit promise that she barely hesitated to break when the time came. Everyone except the poor sister sucks, but I hate the OP most of all.

Arsenic Lupin posted:

I took an honors logic class in college. The midterm consisted of a short set of true/false questions (for instance, "Is this set decidable?") For each question, you had to answer "Sure" or "Unsure" as well as your answer to the question. If you were correct and sure you got 5 points; correct and unsure you got 3; incorrect and unsure you got 0; incorrect and sure you got -N (I have forgotten what N was, it's been years.)

I blew the doors off the rest of the class because I wasn't sure about anything, and if you have taken advanced mathematical logic, neither would you be. Everybody else in the class was sure all the time.

There was such an uproar that the professor recorded both the raw scores and his magically-altered scores for the test, and my moment of glory faded. I was unsure but wrong a fair bit.

I'm no advanced math logician, but it sounds to me like "unsure" would be the better bet for any case where you didn't 100% definitely know the answer, particularly if N was greater than 2.

Chaotic Flame posted:

But brains and feelings are weird and I could see the friend still being hurt from before. Really hope this has a happy update later though.

I mean, worst case scenario, he can blow it off with the classic "now we're even :ocelot:

(finger guns not optional)" and things'll stay cool.

# ? Dec 29, 2021 00:14

Raymond T. Racing: Jun 11, 2019

Hughlander posted:

AITA for calling my wife a cheapskate for giving our kids used Christmas gifts?

Went and found it, OP is looking suspect as hell as time goes on in the comments

# ? Dec 29, 2021 00:16

Butter Activities: May 4, 2018

Hughlander posted:

AITA for calling my wife a cheapskate for giving our kids used Christmas gifts?

Wow wife has some broke brain.

Given her reaction is just to ghost the entire family I don�t see her coming back from this. It�s like the beans lady where the bizarre behavior is so wrapped up in layers of denial bizarre thinking that they won�t even start talk about it no matter how it burns down their life.

# ? Dec 29, 2021 00:18

Armitag3: Mar 15, 2020; Forget it Jake, it's cybertown.

Buff Hardback posted:

Went and found it, OP is looking suspect as hell as time goes on in the comments

Well????

# ? Dec 29, 2021 00:18

Butter Activities: May 4, 2018

Buff Hardback posted:

Went and found it, OP is looking suspect as hell as time goes on in the comments

What now

# ? Dec 29, 2021 00:19

Malcolm Excellent: May 20, 2007; Buglord

I know if my mom gave me poo poo you get for free at a hotel, and a bunch of broken garbage I'd be pretty upset.

If she then left for several days I'd definitely tell everyone I want to stay with my dad during and after the divorce

# ? Dec 29, 2021 00:20

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# ? May 28, 2024 03:11

PHIZ KALIFA: Dec 21, 2011; #mood

Sisal Two-Step posted:

"I'm in such a hard position!! I had to choose between a huge lavish ridiculous wedding where I can be a princess for a day or my sister. Why won't anyone feel sorry for me "

Here's a nice one:

Want to ask my friend [19F] out, now that she�s a girl, but worried I�ll [20M] hurt her feelings.

aw these zany kids :3:

i hope they have some nice safe fun togehter.

# ? Dec 29, 2021 00:22

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

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