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Hamburger Clamburger!  
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Jan 12, 2022 19:38
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A nu-metal themed restaurant that blasts Trapt, Mudvayne, and Korn and whenever freak on a leash comes on the servers have to throw up horns and headbang.
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Jan 12, 2022 19:38
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numberoneposter posted:I think I've been to this restaurant. Does it have two totally different menus depending on if you can read Chinese or not? Yes but their teenage niece is the hostess and she'll just hand you the "white" menu regardless. The owners will barely speak to you but as soon as an Asian family comes in they are treated like longtime customers and you are ignored while they converse loudly in Mandarin while looking your way and laughing. When you do order something "very spicy please", the entire kitchen staff will gather behind the counter and watch you take a bite (this actually happened to me)
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Jan 12, 2022 19:42
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Like those vegan places that serve 'wings' and 'ribs', except we serve things like 'cauliflower' (Chicken), 'jackfruit' (pulled pork) and 'tofu' (Beef fat). Only in very small letters hidden somewhere on the menu does it say that everything contains meat.
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Jan 12, 2022 19:42
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Pooters Hot girls walk around pantsless in crop tops and fart on your food. 
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Jan 12, 2022 19:47
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shut up blegum posted:A restaurant where food is served in a plaster cast of the cook's mouth and you have to slurp the food out of it. everyone was making fun of the chef but tbh I agreed with him when he wrote that letter like “you deliberately came to my restaurant where everything is supposed to be bizarre and abstract on purpose and then you wrote an article making fun of me for not giving you a normal meal”
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Jan 12, 2022 19:48
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"The Racist Factory" The wait staff is encouraged to be rude and make overt racist comments to customers, microagressions are rampant, and the menu serves food catered to EVERY race and everything is subpar. All the dishwashers are mexican, only attractive white women can seat you at the table, and their signature dessert is cheesecake. Also everyone who works there is on drugs
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Jan 12, 2022 19:53
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY! The only food served is thawed, previously frozen birthday cake which is brought to you while five waiters (one is over enthusiastic, one is obviously embarrassed) sing loudly while clapping along
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Jan 12, 2022 19:55
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Furious George posted:Like those vegan places that serve 'wings' and 'ribs', except we serve things like 'cauliflower' (Chicken), 'jackfruit' (pulled pork) and 'tofu' (Beef fat). Only in very small letters hidden somewhere on the menu does it say that everything contains meat. I'll have an extra large order of charred tofu please 
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Jan 12, 2022 19:57
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once when I used to be vegan I was at a fancy restaurant and ordered a “cauliflower steak” which was priced almost like a real steak so I assumed they were gonna do something really cool to it, and it turned out it was just a slab of roasted cauliflower with a little bit of salt and pepper on it. I got completely owned but it’s my own fault because I got what I ordered
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Jan 12, 2022 19:59
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U.S. Crust Company It's a pizza restaurant but all the employees are caricatures of old rich bankers.
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Jan 12, 2022 20:02
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Sorry, Your Meal Will Be Right Out Enjoy a restaurant that is always understaffed in the kitchen and employs wait staff that never worked in a restaurant. Menus will be handed out 17 minutes after you are seated and water (not your actual drink order lol) will be brought to the table 23 minutes after that. Watch as other tables with larger parties, who arrived 35 minutes after you did, get their meals almost immediately. When you try to get your waiter's attention he'll just say, "Sorry, Your Meal Will Be Right Out!" and then goes on to sit at the bar and look at his phone for the next 20 minutes.
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Jan 12, 2022 20:03
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did anyone say diarrhea diner yet? it sounds bad but i bet i could make it work.
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Jan 12, 2022 20:13
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A restaurant where every dish has a major allergen as the center point. An LPN is on staff to administer antihistamines and epi pens so that allergic patrons can try the dangerous food they can't normally eat.
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Jan 12, 2022 20:16
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Dignity Van Houten posted:"The Racist Factory" Bonzo posted:Sorry, Your Meal Will Be Right Out I could swear these are both the same restaurant because the last Cheesecake Factory I ate at did exactly all of these things
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Jan 12, 2022 20:17
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a restaurant that serves the op's posts lmao got em!
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Jan 12, 2022 20:23
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A strip mall Greek/Pita restaurant where all the kitchen staff stand by the front door, smoking cigarettes until they have to make your order.
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Jan 12, 2022 20:30
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A burger restaurant only all of the toppings are on the insiding of the burger. Tomatoes, lettuce, buns, it's all inside that meatball
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Jan 12, 2022 20:32
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Saul Food A kosher soul food restaurant, started by local Jewish community leader Saul Feldstien, that has no pork of shellfish items.
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Jan 12, 2022 20:34
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all the food from the menu is served as a blank, white gruel, but through the magic of chemistry and gastronomy, tastes sorta kinda like maybe...a burger? no no no, a BLT? i think we got our orders switched lemme try yours...
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Jan 12, 2022 20:39
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A normal American restaurant, but on Veteran's Day they offer a huge discount for veterans and then randomly set off firecrackers around the dining area to trigger PTSD flashbacks
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Jan 12, 2022 20:39
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A restaurant with BOH staff that aren’t drugattics
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Jan 12, 2022 21:00
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a self serve honor system pizza slice joint. take what you want and pay what you want. the pizza quality is reflected in this business model.
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Jan 12, 2022 21:02
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a restaurant run by mods
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Jan 12, 2022 21:05
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A restaurant where every plate is just a little too small for your item but the waiters keep telling you how your plate is so big they can't even fit it in the restaurant dishwasher.
lonelylikezoidberg fucked around with this message at 22:16 on Jan 12, 2022 |
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Jan 12, 2022 21:06
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a restaurant where there's an array of noodles ending at your table. You slurp down the endless noodle and they measure back in the kitchen to charge you. The noodles would run through the walls like electric wiring (could reuse normal wall outlets maybe?)
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Jan 12, 2022 21:08
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Olive Garten Celebrity chef Ina Garten open a new Italian restaurant in the east Hamptons. The wait staff is made up of Ina's "neighbors" who are totally not her husband Jeffery's gay lovers from the city. Nope, not at all.
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Jan 12, 2022 21:10
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a restaurant where all the seats are working toilets and every time you flush down a confirmed BM you get 5% off your tab
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Jan 12, 2022 21:12
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Straight Shooters You call over your waiter by firing a shot in the air. If a stray bullet hits you, you eat for free.
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Jan 12, 2022 21:16
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Burger Sting it's like burger king, except you have to give your ID to order and if you have an outstanding warrant you get arrested on the spot. also Sting likes to hang out there
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Jan 12, 2022 21:18
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dont own a dog? come down to pooch's cafe experience the real thing. our house dogs will stare unblinkingly at you while you eat your meal!
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Jan 12, 2022 21:20
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Owl Pellets it's a restaurant where all the food comes in pellet form like those owl barfs and you have to untangle the food from all the hair and bones. also there are owls hanging out like in those cat cafes so be careful to not eat the actual owl barfs
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Jan 12, 2022 21:21
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numberoneposter posted:dont own a dog? come down to pooch's cafe experience the real thing. our house dogs will stare unblinkingly at you while you eat your meal! Can I request an extra drooly dog?
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Jan 12, 2022 21:21
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a restaurant where everything is totally normal and the food is delicious except the chef empties an entire bottle of blue food coloring into every dish
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Jan 12, 2022 21:23
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a crowd funded hot dog shack
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Jan 12, 2022 21:28
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Uncle Harry's Holiday Dinner Can't wait for Thanksgiving or Christmas to argue politics with aging relatives? C'mon in for a turkey dinner with all the fixin's while our Boomer age wait staff tell you why Trump and Jesus are here to save us all.
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Jan 12, 2022 21:29
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a restaurant where every dish they serve is a dish that was sent back to the kitchen by another customer
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Jan 12, 2022 21:29
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A restaurant where everything is fried “popcorn style”.
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Jan 12, 2022 21:31
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All you can eat hamburger helper buffet. All varieties
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Jan 12, 2022 21:33
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| # ? Jun 8, 2024 06:22 |
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A buffet style restaurant where everything is "fountain-based." Even the solid foods are kept floating in the bowl of a fountain, with some kind of dressing or dipping sauce running over them.
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Jan 12, 2022 21:33
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