OSHA IV: NO SAFETY - SMOKING FIRST - The Something Awful Forums

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Cojawfee: May 31, 2006; I think the US is dumb for not using Celsius

Elon builds a metal coffin, leaves it outside the entrance to the cavecave, and then calls a nearby rescuer a pedo guy.

# ? Feb 20, 2022 07:48

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# ? May 30, 2024 03:11

Post poste: Mar 29, 2010

8one6 posted:

You die slowly while onlookers are helpless to extract you. Then they seal that part of the cave and put up a plaque at the entrance to the cave.

That's not fair.
Sometimes your dying body becomes a roadside attraction!
Sometimes they sell merch themed on your death.

# ? Feb 20, 2022 07:50

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

Sometimes your corpse becomes a landmark in other people�s directions

# ? Feb 20, 2022 07:52

BasicLich: Oct 22, 2020; A very smart little mouse!

sometimes youre peanus horts

# ? Feb 20, 2022 07:53

The Lone Badger: Sep 24, 2007

haveblue posted:

Sometimes your corpse becomes a landmark in other people�s directions

I thought that was mountain climbing?

# ? Feb 20, 2022 07:54

Bad Munki: Nov 4, 2008; We're all mad here.

What is a mountain but a backwards cave?

# ? Feb 20, 2022 08:11

BasicLich: Oct 22, 2020; A very smart little mouse!

Bad Munki posted:

What is a mountain but a backwards cave?

you're thinking of an ocean trench, a backwards cave is called a volcanic eruption

# ? Feb 20, 2022 08:12

Bad Munki: Nov 4, 2008; We're all mad here.

BasicLich posted:

you're thinking of an ocean trench, a backwards cave is called a volcanic eruption

No, that�s the opposite of a cave-in: a cave-out.

# ? Feb 20, 2022 08:15

Fools Infinite: Mar 21, 2006; Journeyman

Sometimes you like cave diving. Sometimes someone else who likes cave diving takes up the task of recovering your body. Sometimes additional people who like cave diving are needed to recover both of your bodies.

# ? Feb 20, 2022 08:24

PhazonLink: Jul 17, 2010

a backwards cave would be a massive open field with a very narrow rock formation?

# ? Feb 20, 2022 08:27

Kingo Ligma: Aug 24, 2019; Ask me about calling people racist because I failed geography.

PhazonLink posted:

a backwards cave would be a massive open field with a very narrow rock formation?

So your mum then?

# ? Feb 20, 2022 08:50

Unperson_47: Oct 14, 2007

That cave pervert just needs to get a weighted blanket.

# ? Feb 20, 2022 09:33

Sagebrush: Feb 26, 2012

i'm not gonna post the horrible story of the nutty putty cave guy. instead, have this awesome story of ted the caver:

https://www.angelfire.com/trek/caver/

yes it is literally an angelfire site. it's worth reading. trust me

# ? Feb 20, 2022 09:47

Zetsubou-san: Jan 28, 2015; Cruel Bifaunidas demanded that you [stand]🧍 I require only that you [kneel]🧎

i swear angelfire still exists just so this one link will work

# ? Feb 20, 2022 09:50

OgNar: Oct 26, 2002; They tapdance not, neither do they fart

I can't believe Ted the Caver still works.

# ? Feb 20, 2022 10:26

Zetsubou-san: Jan 28, 2015; Cruel Bifaunidas demanded that you [stand]🧍 I require only that you [kneel]🧎

now a ~~major~~ motion picture!

# ? Feb 20, 2022 12:16

Powerful Two-Hander: Mar 10, 2004; Mods please change my name to "Tooter Skeleton" TIA.

Sagebrush posted:

i'm not gonna post the horrible story of the nutty putty cave guy. instead, have this awesome story of ted the caver:

https://www.angelfire.com/trek/caver/

yes it is literally an angelfire site. it's worth reading. trust me

drat this is old. Didn't this end/have a version where it ended with I found the camera with one last picture and had some goblin thing in it dun dun duhhhh

# ? Feb 20, 2022 12:23

Humphreys: Jan 26, 2013; We conceived a way to use my mother as a porn mule

Powerful Two-Hander posted:

drat this is old. Didn't this end/have a version where it ended with I found the camera with one last picture and had some goblin thing in it dun dun duhhhh

Is there TL;DR of it?

# ? Feb 20, 2022 12:58

Zopotantor: Feb 24, 2013; ...und ist er drin dann lassen wir ihn niemals wieder raus...

The Lone Badger posted:

But if people know you're missing... then what? Do they remove the entire overburden or what?

They put up a sign saying, "Come talk to a dead man!" and charge $1 per minute.

# ? Feb 20, 2022 13:14

Pigsfeet on Rye: Oct 22, 2008; I'm meat on the hoof

https://www.nps.gov/articles/000/tragedy-at-sand-cave.htm

# ? Feb 20, 2022 13:54

zedprime: Jun 9, 2007; yospos

Powerful Two-Hander posted:

drat this is old. Didn't this end/have a version where it ended with I found the camera with one last picture and had some goblin thing in it dun dun duhhhh

This took off as an early form of creepy pasta including people having no idea why it works as a 2001 era blog. I think the two main heavy handed copycats were one that added a really bad photoshop at the end which may have been based on the next one, and one that wrote out a really hilarious ending, changed some random details, and was formatted to look like a text dump of a novel with the copyright backdated to 1987 in some weird attempt to make the blog look like a new fangled copycat.

# ? Feb 20, 2022 14:21

Powerful Two-Hander: Mar 10, 2004; Mods please change my name to "Tooter Skeleton" TIA.

zedprime posted:

This took off as an early form of creepy pasta including people having no idea why it works as a 2001 era blog. I think the two main heavy handed copycats were one that added a really bad photoshop at the end which may have been based on the next one, and one that wrote out a really hilarious ending, changed some random details, and was formatted to look like a text dump of a novel with the copyright backdated to 1987 in some weird attempt to make the blog look like a new fangled copycat.

Yeah the one with the bad photoshop is what I remember, but maybe as a "here's the lost chapter!" thing after the original.

# ? Feb 20, 2022 14:23

Bloody Hedgehog: Dec 12, 2003; 💥💥🤯💥💥
Gotta nuke something

Zopotantor posted:

They put up a sign saying, "Come talk to a dead man!" and charge $1 per minute.

# ? Feb 20, 2022 14:26

chrisgt: Sep 6, 2011

ekuNNN posted:

https://va.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_r7i9pfdBbH1r0uzl6.mp4

OMFG NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE.
The thing that scares me more than literally anything else in the world is getting trapped, unable to move.

# ? Feb 20, 2022 19:12

Mimesweeper: Mar 11, 2009; Smellrose

chrisgt posted:

OMFG NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE.
The thing that scares me more than literally anything else in the world is getting trapped, unable to move.

one time as a kid i thought itd be fun to lay down in the back seat of my parents' car and have a friend put the seats back, so i could hide there or something? i dont know. kid logic

they put the seats back then closed the doors and left :smith:

thought it was hilarious

it was a bad time

# ? Feb 20, 2022 19:23

BrideOfUglycat: Oct 30, 2000

Jabor posted:

You don't just take two flat faces and weld them together. If you did, it would hold together (the welding process melts the metal where you've welded so it'll solidify together), but it'll be very weak compared to the rest of the object since it's only held together at the rim.

From my (admittedly very poor) understanding, you COULD do that with Friction Stir Welding since it essentially bonds the two flat faces together.

# ? Feb 20, 2022 19:41

nomad2020: Jan 30, 2007

Sometimes, if your lucky, you can combine the sports of mountaineering caving and diving.

https://dynamic.hs.fi/2014/deep/

A good, but long write up of 5 men entering Pluragrotta, with only 2 making it through to the exit and 1 who left via the entrance alone.

# ? Feb 20, 2022 19:48

Butterwagon: Mar 21, 2010; Lookit that stupid ass-hole!

Jabor posted:

You don't just take two flat faces and weld them together. If you did, it would hold together (the welding process melts the metal where you've welded so it'll solidify together), but it'll be very weak compared to the rest of the object since it's only held together at the rim.

Usually what you'll do is carve out an angle from one or both pieces, so that you have a v-shape opening between them. You repeatedly weld a layer into the V, peen it to help relieve any stress, weld another layer on top, and so on until you've filled everything out and have solid welded metal all the way through the joint.

You can if you use Explosion Welding! :science:

# ? Feb 20, 2022 19:56

MrYenko: Jun 18, 2012; #2 isn't ALWAYS bad...

nomad2020 posted:

Sometimes, if your lucky, you can combine the sports of mountaineering caving and diving.

https://dynamic.hs.fi/2014/deep/

A good, but long write up of 5 men entering Pluragrotta, with only 2 making it through to the exit and 1 who left via the entrance alone.

quote:

�the cave diving community has remained small due to the risks associated with the hobby.

There are waaaaay cheaper ways to kill yourself.

# ? Feb 20, 2022 20:11

Sagebrush: Feb 26, 2012

Powerful Two-Hander posted:

drat this is old. Didn't this end/have a version where it ended with I found the camera with one last picture and had some goblin thing in it dun dun duhhhh

There's another version that adds a couple of final chapters where, if I recall correctly, a giant demon thing chases him out of the cave and shoots off into the sky, and then he meets an old prospector living near the cave who is the guardian of it, and learns a story about some native tribe who sealed a demon in there, and they go back and fight it and destroy it and he becomes the new guardian or something and it's incredibly dumb as poo poo and makes the whole story worse so I do not recommend you look for it. The story is perfect as written.

Humphreys posted:

Is there TL;DR of it?

Man goes into cave and has creepy experiences.

Everything else you'll have to read yourself, because the slow build is what makes it good.

Sagebrush fucked around with this message at 20:23 on Feb 20, 2022

# ? Feb 20, 2022 20:20

Bismuth: Jun 11, 2010; by Azathoth; Hell Gem

nomad2020 posted:

Sometimes, if your lucky, you can combine the sports of mountaineering caving and diving.

https://dynamic.hs.fi/2014/deep/

A good, but long write up of 5 men entering Pluragrotta, with only 2 making it through to the exit and 1 who left via the entrance alone.

The part where hes in the deep cave thinking about his wife and kids got to me, not in a "this is sad" way but a "no poo poo, you dumbass" way

I cant imagine putting myself at this level of risk (for fun) with a whole rear end family waiting for me.

# ? Feb 20, 2022 20:44

Zerg Mans: Oct 19, 2006

Softface posted:

If it's Russian, why does it have the Ukrainian crest on its tail?

I meant place of manufacture

# ? Feb 20, 2022 20:48

EIDE Van Hagar: Dec 8, 2000; Beep Boop

haveblue posted:

Sometimes your corpse becomes a landmark in other people�s directions

Saw this guy in the ATM cave in Belize. You have to swim in and climb to him.

# ? Feb 20, 2022 22:45

Bad Munki: Nov 4, 2008; We're all mad here.

How�s he doing?

# ? Feb 20, 2022 22:46

EIDE Van Hagar: Dec 8, 2000; Beep Boop

Bad Munki posted:

How�s he doing?

His calcified bones have been telling people not to go into caves for the last 1,100 years (he died as a 17 year old Mayan by having two vertebrae shattered, possibly a human sacrifice or some other ritual that killed him as there are lots of skeletons in that cave that died similarly violent deaths)

# ? Feb 20, 2022 22:54