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darkwasthenight
Jan 7, 2011

GENE TRAITOR

olylifter posted:

there is no loving way on god's green earth that someone named a child Cannon. I know it's true but I just refuse to believe it

It's true, even if only in my head.

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Spalec
Apr 16, 2010

Cowslips Warren posted:



AITA for not punishing my daughter because she explained what periods are to other kids?

How does a 10 year old girl not already know about periods? It's not outside the realm of possibility she could have started menstruating by that age right?

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



AITA for saying "having the acts of service love language doesnt excuse you for being loving lazy"?

quote:

My husband loves having things done for him without him asking. Whether it be me taking the dog out for him, going to the store so he doesnt have to and even all the way down to me just doing things for him in general. Our marriage therapist says it's due to him having the "acts of service" love language. I have frustrations revolving around this.

So basically my husband has gotten to a point where the only way he feels that I love and appreciate him is if I do everything for him. Like for example, I can be cooking dinner and he will be "helping" me (by taste testing), but the second that dinner is done he walks away and goes to sit down because he wants me to make his plate for him.

So for awhile now I could be laying in bed and he could be sitting at his computer desk (same room- small apartment) and despite the fact that I'm laying down and in my birthday suit ready for bed, he will still ask me to go get him a drink or food or whatever else. Now I will admit that prior to the plague hitting, I actually enjoyed doing all of this for him. But now, the kids are home full time with remote learning so I am with 3 kids catering to them 24/7 AND catering to him on top of it and I dont have a single second to sit down and decompress without one of them needing me. I currently do not work (so brownie points for him because he does) but I do have an income (due to me getting paid by my last employer while an investigation is underway for wrongful termination). He does the dishes maybe once every 6 months and doesnt finish the whole load. Cooks dinner maybe once a month. So everything is on me.

So I had a discussion with him the other day stating that him constantly asking me to do things for him when he is more than capable is putting a poo poo load of emotional hardship on me because I dont have 2 seconds to myself unless I'm sleeping. His only response was the whole "our therapist said that my love language is normal" so I said "your love language doesnt excuse you from being lazy and not doing anything for yourself." Now I'm being told I'm inconsiderate for not understanding and now he feels undervalued. AITA?

Sorry honey, the therapist says it's cool for me to sit around like a dumb lazy baby all the time. Anyways, grab me a coke

Nae
Sep 3, 2020

what.

Spalec posted:

How does a 10 year old girl not already know about periods? It's not outside the realm of possibility she could have started menstruating by that age right?

It's possible, yeah. Not common, but not so far out of the ordinary that it should come as a shock to the parent or child. Which is to say that yeah, somebody should have talked to her about this by now.

HopperUK
Apr 29, 2007

Why would an ambulance be leaving the hospital?

Spalec posted:

How does a 10 year old girl not already know about periods? It's not outside the realm of possibility she could have started menstruating by that age right?

My mum started hers at 10 years old back in 1967 when it was very unusual, and nobody would explain it clearly and she thought she was dying for like two months. So I learned about it very early, so early I don't recall the conversation. These days it's even more important because it's happening earlier and earlier.

wizardofloneliness
Dec 30, 2008

Spalec posted:

How does a 10 year old girl not already know about periods? It's not outside the realm of possibility she could have started menstruating by that age right?

When I was in elementary school, we had a basic health class for the 5th-graders that talked about periods and puberty stuff. That’s now banned in a lot of places because of psycho parents and conservatives, so a lot of kids aren’t going to have a reliable source of info. That girl’s mom seems like the type to police her interactions hard, so getting info from friends or the internet might not be easy either.

ilmucche
Mar 16, 2016

What did you say the strategy was?

Pigsfeet on Rye posted:

Conservative social media users also appropriated phrases from the anti-racist policing movement in support of Hinnant.[1] Hinnant's mother posted to Facebook stating that Hinnant's death had nothing to do with race. She also specifically requested that people stop comparing her son's death to the murder of George Floyd.[2] "

Can't imagine how amazingly lovely it must be to lose your child in an act of violence then see a bunch of people try and spin it like that.

deety
Aug 2, 2004

zombies + sharks = fun

ilmucche posted:

Can't imagine how amazingly lovely it must be to lose your child in an act of violence then see a bunch of people try and spin it like that.

I live in a city not too far from where that happened, and holy poo poo did that tragedy make it clear who the worst people left on my social media were. They'd actually been keeping their mouths shut about BLM, but then they started posting about how His Life Mattered. It was like they knew that more direct posts would make it clear how racist they were, but they thought they could use this event to let it all out. I replied to all their poo poo, linking to the large amounts of news coverage that Fox News told them didn't exist and explaining how that case was really loving different from all the ones where the authorities were protecting the killers. Eventually all three of them blocked me, but I got some support from their other FB friends first, so I'm hoping that, if nothing else, some of the other people who knew them saw those masks slip.

Piell
Sep 3, 2006

Grey Worm's Ken doll-like groin throbbed with the anticipatory pleasure that only a slightly warm and moist piece of lemoncake could offer


Young Orc
AITA for how I reacted when my husband threw away our daughter's kitchen tools that I bought her?

quote:

My daughter Liz [15] loves cooking, She began discovering new meals after she became vegan (she was a very picky eater in the past). I encourage her to cook her own food but my husband hates it although she still sits at the table with us, but he thinks that her having different food on the table is "disrespectful" to the family and she should just be eating what we eat. I thought that was ridiculous and asked him to just let her be. He got more agitated and said that Liz wasn't allowed to use any tool in our kitchen if she decides to cook for herself since he paid for everything the kitchen has. I fought back on his decision but he stood firm. I decided to just go out and buy her all the tools she needed to make her meals. She buys her own groceries so I don't have to worry about that.

Last night I was out and Liz called me crying saying my husband threw away all the tools I got her to prevent her from cooking. I was fuming I went home and started arguing with him telling him those weren't his tools, he argued that Liz was cooking in his kitchen and he already didn't authorize that. I blew up and went off on him telling him he's ridiculous and was just looking for excuses to prevent Liz from cooking. He yelled that Liz is acting spoiled and that I repeatedly let her disrespect us and table manners by letting her cook her own food instead of being grateful and eating what's already on the table. We fought some more than I went upstairs. he followed me saying I'm avoiding responsibility and that I'm encouraging Liz to become selfish and egotistical instead of appreciating what's infront of her. I refused to talk to him and he said I should apologize for reacting by yelling at him and calling him names.

EDIT
(1 why I let my daughter buy her own groceries? 2 reasons, One is that she uses the money I give her to buy groceries. and Two is that she knows what she needs to cook meals and has more knowledge with vegan products so she shops by herself and sometimes I take her with me if it's a new place.
(2 Is there a cultural factor? We're from latin america and my husband is the sole provider for the family.
(3 Why can't the whole family eat vegan? Because I have younger kids and they don't eat vegetables.

The Lone Badger
Sep 24, 2007

Captain Hygiene posted:

AITA for saying "having the acts of service love language doesnt excuse you for being loving lazy"?

If that was his "love language" doesn't that mean it'd feel natural and normal to him to perform acts of service for her? Unless of course he doesn't love her.

The_Franz
Aug 8, 2003

Piell posted:

AITA for how I reacted when my husband threw away our daughter's kitchen tools that I bought her?

It's 'disrespectful' for the daughter to eat different food from everyone else? Ok, start making vegan meals for everyone. Problem solved.

Midnight Voyager
Jul 2, 2008

Lipstick Apathy

Spalec posted:

How does a 10 year old girl not already know about periods? It's not outside the realm of possibility she could have started menstruating by that age right?

dude, I didn't get taught about periods until I was in tears from embarrassment, having thought I'd just started making GBS threads myself out of nowhere for two days. The answer is "Easily, when their parents suck enough at that stuff."

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



The Lone Badger posted:

If that was his "love language" doesn't that mean it'd feel natural and normal to him to perform acts of service for her? Unless of course he doesn't love her.

ME doing the acts of service, for someone else?! :crossarms:

GI_Clutch
Aug 22, 2000

by Fluffdaddy
Dinosaur Gum
I think I saw at least one thousand pads absorb blue liquid via television commercial before I hit double digits. Obviously the problem is that kids aren't watching enough TV these days. At least, not enough commercials. Hell, they even use red liquid now to get the point across. It felt like every other commercial back in the day was about periods or a diaper commercial with bare baby asses. At least than trend died out.

Midnight Voyager
Jul 2, 2008

Lipstick Apathy

GI_Clutch posted:

I think I saw at least one thousand pads absorb blue liquid via television commercial before I hit double digits. Obviously the problem is that kids aren't watching enough TV these days. At least, not enough commercials. Hell, they even use red liquid now to get the point across. It felt like every other commercial back in the day was about periods or a diaper commercial with bare baby asses. At least than trend died out.

They don't tell you that it might look brown at first so you go days thinking you're making GBS threads yourself.

artsy fartsy
May 10, 2014

You'll be ahead instead of behind. Hello!

darkwasthenight posted:

It's true, even if only in my head.

Hehehe

Cowslips Warren
Oct 29, 2005

What use had they for tricks and cunning, living in the enemy's warren and paying his price?

Grimey Drawer
I think if we can't tell kids about sex and consent and periods (which is loving basic biology and should be taught in a health or science course, IT ISN'T ANYTHING loving SPECIAL), we should just show the film Osama and let them figure poo poo out themselves.

Wait how did they figure out she's a girl when oooooooo.

Sisal Two-Step
May 29, 2006

mom without jaw
dad without wife


i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry
It's kind of charming and nice that one of the latest big cartoon movie releases is a coming of age story that's mostly about a girl getting her period. It's nice to know that a girl's period can be brought up in age-appropriate media and not a plot point in, say, a horror movie (Carrie, IT Chapter 1).

e: Ginger Snaps also

Sisal Two-Step fucked around with this message at 02:45 on Apr 16, 2022

Absurd Alhazred
Mar 27, 2010

by Athanatos

Piell posted:

AITA for how I reacted when my husband threw away our daughter's kitchen tools that I bought her?

He says "disrespectful" when he means "non-deferential". Divorce, OP.

The Lone Badger
Sep 24, 2007

Sisal Two-Step posted:

It's kind of charming and nice that one of the latest big cartoon movie releases is a coming of age story that's mostly about a girl getting her period. It's nice to know that a girl's period can be brought up in age-appropriate media and not a plot point in, say, a horror movie (Carrie, IT Chapter 1).

Rightwingers are going nuts about it ofc.

Plan R
Oct 5, 2021

For Romeo

The Lone Badger posted:

Rightwingers are going nuts about it ofc.

It's going to be quite the toss when they ban women from existing.

therobit
Aug 19, 2008

I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Cowslips Warren posted:

I think if we can't tell kids about sex and consent and periods (which is loving basic biology and should be taught in a health or science course, IT ISN'T ANYTHING loving SPECIAL), we should just show the film Osama and let them figure poo poo out themselves.

Wait how did they figure out she's a girl when oooooooo.

It always baffles me how kids don’t just absorb this stuff from living in a house with a woman and being curious before their old enough to feel embarrassed asking questions about mom’s pads. It seems like it would require a lot of effort to hide it from them but I guess some parents are really committed to it.

artsy fartsy
May 10, 2014

You'll be ahead instead of behind. Hello!
AITA for refusing to get back in the car after he decided to give people we didnt know a ride?

quote:

So basically my BF and I (22) play in pool competitions at the bar down the street every Thursday night. We arent big drinkers but obviously it's a bar in the middle of the city and everyone else drinks and acts ridiculous most times.

So yesterday we went to the bar to play pool and I actually had a couple drinks because my social anxiety was on edge. Usually a drink will kind of calm me down but after two, I realized it wasnt helping at all. At this point I had a severe headache so I told him I wanted to go home. Well.. as I was telling him this, a girl and her BF I'm assuming comes over and just starts talking (she was wasted) to my BF and being super loud and touchy. Not in a weird way at all. Just her being drunk and like, kneeling over laughing way too loud and grabbing my BF to stabilize herself. Now.. my BF has ADHD and if you get him around someone who's loud, it's like something switches in his brain and it seems like he tries to be louder than the other person. So they were basically laugh screaming at eachother for a solid 45 minutes before I was finally able to get him out of the bar (he wasnt drinking).

So we get out to the car and I tell him my head is killing me and everything was fine until he saw that girl and her BF walk out of the bar. He pulls up beside them and screams over me "Hey girl, you need a ride?" (In one of his made up ADHD stimming accents). I ask him why the gently caress he would do that knowing I have a headache and want to go the gently caress home and he ignores me and they get in and tell him they live 15 minutes away and that this dude had a loving car but had warrants and didnt want to drive. Within MAYBE 1 minute of them being in the car, all 3 of them (my fiance, her and her BF) were all scream laughing, yelling out the window at people, etc and my fiance isnt even paying attention to the road and lightly hits a snowbank that wasnt plowed back all the way. So like he gets out to check the front end and I get out and tell him I will see him back at the house cause I'm not dealing with this (we only live like 5 minutes walking distance). Well the girl in the back seat starts freaking the gently caress out and chasing me down the street "get back in the car girl", "come on girl, dont be like that". But I just kept walking because at that point, I felt like not only was I being disrespected by my fiance for putting me in this position but she was now disrespecting me by trying to take away my ability to make choices for myself. He says I embarassed him and that I killed the mood because it's not every day that he "vibes" with someone. AITA?

I'm dead

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Judging from some of these stories, moms wrap their pads in fifty layers of toilet paper, put the parcel at the very bottom of the rubbish bin, then immure that inside a wall of a tower built on an asteroid whose orbit has been directed to plunge into the sun. And if you don't do that, you're a disgusting humiliation masquerading in women's skin.

Agrikk
Oct 17, 2003

Take care with that! We have not fully ascertained its function, and the ticking is accelerating.

Absurd Alhazred posted:

AITA for telling my pregnant wife being pregnant isn’t as bad as having cancer

Definitely NTA.

Cancer loving sucks, and having the missus go through treatment twice with all the surgeries, chemo, radiation, reconstructive surgery, physical therapy, mental therapy and everything else,

No. The worst pregnancy symptoms aren’t anywhere close to cancer and OP has every right to claim that title. Cancer has few upsides except that you automatically win most story-topping contests.


My favorite personal experience was when I was complaining to my sister about feeling helpless in the face of my wife’s suffering and she responded, “I know how you mean. My kitchen renovation has my life all upside down as well! Doesn’t it suck?”

Agrikk fucked around with this message at 03:35 on Apr 16, 2022

Evil Willow
Apr 26, 2007
Bored now...
AITA for sometimes interrupting my girlfriend's skincare routine?

quote:

Throwaway because she uses reddit sometimes.

Me (29M) and GF (28F) have been together for a little over a year. As some background, I'm generally laid back and she can be a bit "type A." Sometimes we clash because of that.

She has an overly complicated skincare routine that she does every night, it's seriously five or more different steps. I kinda knew about this before I moved in with her, but it was never a big deal because we were only spending the night with each other about once a week so I didn't realize exactly how serious she is about it.

Basically, she doesn't want to do anything after her routine. She doesn't want to leave the house or be intimate after she's done because she doesn't want to sweat or expose her skin unnecessarily after she's applied some kind of chemical (idk exactly what, I didn't understand this part).

To be fair, she usually does the routine close to bed time, but sometimes things come up and I'll ask her to go pick something up from the store or things like that.

We had a conversation about this because she felt like I was asking for stuff after her routine on purpose to mess with her. So she has started asking me if I need something or if I want to be intimate before she does her routine. But sometimes I'll say no and then realize I actually do want something so I'll ask and she gets upset with me and refuses.

It's only maybe once or twice a week, which isn't often at all. She says I'm being inconsiderate, but it's not like I'm forgetting stuff or realizing that I do want to be intimate on purpose. I feel like she's being unreasonable and that routine interruptions are normal and nothing to be upset about. Am I the rear end in a top hat here?

Tl;dr: My gf has a complicated skincare routine before bed. She gets upset if I ask her for something after her routine and claims I'm inconsiderate. I think it's normal and she should relax a little. AITA?

Edit: Jesus, I didn't expect to wake up from my nap and be torn to shreds. Way too many comments to respond to. I get it, I need to say sorry and I will when she gets home tonight.

To answer some of the most common questions I've seen that I didn't already answer: the store is a couple miles away and there are no public transit options available that late. I can't afford to Uber and my girlfriend won't let me sync her cards to my Uber account or anything. My girlfriend offered to pay for a driver's ed course, but what's the point if I don't have a car?? She wouldn't let me use hers because it's really nice and I'd be too new of a driver for her to be comfortable with that (I don't think being a new driver means being a bad driver, but ok). And I am looking for a new job, I just wanted to take a little time off to relax so I haven't been intensely applying, but I do apply for stuff at least once a week

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Evil Willow posted:

AITA for sometimes interrupting my girlfriend's skincare routine?

*gf sits down at table, removes some documents from a binder with OP's name on it and shuffles through them* So....what exactly would you say you bring to the table here

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Holy poo poo five steps? FIVE STEPS? Wow! What a routine! Five steps! Man, and then she doesn't want to randomly go to a store after you said you don't need anything, wow

What a crazy chick, really

Midnight Voyager
Jul 2, 2008

Lipstick Apathy
Suddenly needing something late enough that you're ready for bed twice a week is an insane amount of times a week.

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Oh babe I need a new vape pen battery

Yes it's an emergency

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Life's tough when you spend five minutes a week thinking about applying for a job

StrangersInTheNight
Dec 31, 2007
ABSOLUTE FUCKING GUDGEON

Midnight Voyager posted:

Suddenly needing something late enough that you're ready for bed twice a week is an insane amount of times a week.

Yeh I think I'm old bc I don't leave after getting ready for bedtime for anything unless it's absolutely dire, as in I'd die without it. Otherwise, it can wait until the morning.

StrangersInTheNight
Dec 31, 2007
ABSOLUTE FUCKING GUDGEON
Imagining her buying him gummy worms and energy drinks and having an existential crisis at the Wawa

tired gay and dead
Apr 4, 2022

by Hand Knit
I can't think of the last time i left the house unplanned within an hour of going to bed. I don't think I ever have, honestly. Wtf

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

AITA for telling my GF her skin's gone to poo poo

I know it sounds bad but hear me out, she used to do these complex skin care regimens that always left her looking lovely and glowing, but some time after we moved in together she stopped entirely...

limp_cheese
Sep 10, 2007


Nothing to see here. Move along.

Evil Willow posted:

AITA for sometimes interrupting my girlfriend's skincare routine?

my girlfriend won't let me sync her cards to my Uber account or anything

Lol one of the smartest things she's done.

Evil Willow
Apr 26, 2007
Bored now...
AITA For proposing on a meaningful day for my fiance?

quote:

I (42M) have been with my fiancé for 5 years (24F). She used to work at a restaurant I went to frequently, and I used to only go just to see her and would often go alone. It’s a very cute story because I had a schoolboy crush on her and pulled all the old tricks to get her to go out with me. We started to date and I proposed to her recently on her fathers death anniversary, which I thought would be meaningful and take the bad memories out of that date for her. I also knew that during that day she is extra sentimental and emotional, so she is more likely to say yes and we would have a beautiful moment together honouring her late fathers memory.

While she ended up saying yes, the following weeks she changed her demeanour and was very distant with me. She is not usually like this as she is very agreeable and shy (which is why I fell for her in the first place) but she was growing hostile and often disagreed with me on things she usually agreed with. We currently live with her mom (48F), as I lost my job due to conflicting political beliefs with my previous job as I could not afford to pay rent at my old home. I am not currently seeking another job due to the fact that I sprained my ankle last, and my industry is very physically demanding.

Ever since the engagement, her mother and her have been very cold to me. Her mother stopped making my meals, and my fiancé is basically ignoring me.

During dinner one night (That I had to order in), I could not hold it anymore what I finally broke down. I, regrettably, raised my voice and asked why they are icing me out. They look at each other (yet another way they always exclude me) and explain they found my proposal manipulative and not done right as it fell on an ‘important’ date in their family. I explained to them what I explained here, and my fiancé started crying. I felt very guilty in that moment, but stood my ground.

Reddit, am I the rear end in a top hat for proposing to my fiancé on the anniversary of her fathers death?

:pervert:

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Hm, I just wouldn't mix my romantic relationship with my partner's parent's death, personally

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Now look, I may be peers with her mother, but

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Bruceski
Aug 21, 2007

The tools of a hero mean nothing without a solid core.

StrangersInTheNight posted:

Yeh I think I'm old bc I don't leave after getting ready for bedtime for anything unless it's absolutely dire, as in I'd die without it. Otherwise, it can wait until the morning.

I was gonna say the same except I used to have a cat. "Can see the bottom of his food bowl" probably counts as something I'd die without fixing though.

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