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Ended up taking a couple of days off from spooky movies. Coming back in with this one: #22. My Heart Can't Beat Unless You Tell It To (Peacock) A pair of siblings go to great lengths to keep their younger brother well-stocked with a fresh supply of blood. ...which, if I'm honest, barely feels like a horror movie at all, as opposed to being a Quiet Indie Drama/Character Study piece, something advertising itself as being a vampire film while having neither the form nor the function of one. Hell, they never even say the V-word in the film proper, and they only obliquely refer to the actual usage of blood in the film a couple of times. The rest of the time, it looks and feels more like a slow-burn drama about a pair of adults struggling to keep a sick family member going; you could probably just change "blood" to "money" or "drugs" a few times in the script and basically redo this as a straight-forward no-frills drama, no vampire mythos or spooky elements. Which is what it feels like they were more-or-less doing anyway, like they were ashamed of their central metaphor and wanted to avoid it as much as possible. It's fine, overall - the actors are good, the look is subdued but effective, the tone... works, but they really don't have any variety in the piece. Even the moments of surprise graphic horror, like throat slitting or a shock self-defense attack, or any of the "shocking" betrayals of trust are shot and played pretty flatly, so nothing gets a moment to stand out as surprising. Even the Big Emotional Catharsis at the end is shot in single flat angles and refuses to reveal the outcome of vampire brother Thomas finally deciding to end it all via sunlight immolation, so you end up feeling completely neutral to any of the outcome of any of it. And because of that overriding sense of emotional distance (and subsumed disappointment at having to use horror tropes as metaphor for this Important Indie Film About Big Themes), then I'm completely neutral about whether to recommend it or not.  /5Watched so far: Night of the Living Dead (1968), Escape Room (2019), The Company of Wolves (GMM Challenge 9), Shutter (2008) (GMM Challenge 3), bunch o' shorts (GMM Challenge 7), Black Sunday (1960), The Hallow (GMM Challenge 1), Dr. Strange 2, Madhouse (1974) (GMM Challenge 10), Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1941) (GMM Challenge 13), Memory: The Origins of Alien (GMM Challenge 5), Trollhunter (GMM Challenge 8), Friday the 13th Part 2 (SBLT Challenge), The Little Girl Who Lives Down the Lane, Firestarter (2022) (GMM Challenge 12), Happy Death Day 2U (GMM Challenge 2), The Editor (GMM Challenge 6), Anna and the Apocalypse (GMM Challenge 4), Bones (GMM Challenge 11), Men (2022), Intruder (1989), My Heart Can't Beat Unless You Tell It To
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May 26, 2022 16:05
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gey muckle mowser posted:
 19.) White Zombie Victor Halperin | 1932 | Shudder This really didn’t do much for me. It was interesting to see what a pre-Romero zombie movie felt like but it really didn’t grab me. Perhaps that was because of how short the movie is (1 hour, 7 minutes). There’s some interesting visuals and good music, and Bela Lugosi’s terrific, but that’s it. It might just be me being out of step with the world though. The version I watched on Shudder was kinda choppy so I don’t know if that’s the same with other services or physical releases. Rating: ½ Total: 19/13 New: 18 Rewatches: 1 Challenges: 1. Woodlands Dark and Days Bewitched (Men), 2. Scream, Queen! (The Lost Boys), 3. Rated PG (Saturday the 14th ), 5. Behind the Screams (Birth of the Living Dead), 6. The King in Yellow (The Bird with the Crystal Plumage), X. SECRET BONUS LIMITED TIME CHALLENGE (Friday the 13th Part 2), 9. Hidden Gems (Night of the Creeps), 10. The Price is Right (Dead Heat), 11. Horror Noire (Tales from the Hood), 12. All Hail the King (Firestarter (2022)), 13. Sins of the Past (White Zombie) My Letterboxd list (in progress)
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May 26, 2022 18:16
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CHALLENGES
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80 Spasms wasnt great in much regard it probably wasnt even good, but it had some very entertaining parts, but then it also had parts where I kept wishing it would just push along quicker. Peter Fonda tries here really hard to get things cooking, but he's missing some of that usual swagger he had in this era of his career that was sorely missed. The monster snake is super shoddy, but they do an admirable job of hiding it. The kills are pretty entertaining and the snakes big gimmick of causing near instant swelling into some gooey cronenberg-esque monsters is well done, but none of this salvages a movie I could've cut down to an hour and ten. It really just needed a kick in the pants. Oh and it just sort of ends. Very odd.   Out of 581  This one was quite good. Good performances from the lead villains and there is a great tension built into it that you can tell a lot of movies to come in the future would borrow plenty of its spirit to bring to their movies (Funny Games, The Strangers, When a Stranger Calls Back, Pacific Heights). It gets a bit goofy here and there and the main leads are not great, good, but could've used a bit more guidance. Solid thriller horror picture with some good gore moments. Out of 582  The Craft largely holds up fairly well. The first two acts are like really good and have this sustained narrative tension building and bubbling through all the characters. It's still PG13 so not everyone gets like their big comeuppance, but its got an interesting set of bones to it that carries it along fairly well. The third act is still pretty sloppy though, but that really gets chalked up to I think it being just 90's CG coupled with being unable to envision a broader way of handling witch craft as a tool for combat. It didnt go far enough but also didnt stay reserved enough. It just kinda did the bare minimum of "ooooh creepy right?" and it lets down the first 2/3 of the movie. The cast is great, the soundtrack is great and all the vibes of the movie work very well. its just that last act that the seams really start to be seen. Out of 5
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May 26, 2022 18:23
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13) A Page of Madness (1926) Challenge: Sins of the Past Unfortunately I can't go into much detail on this early Japanese feature, as it had neither intertitles nor the original accompanying reading. What's left is more of a fantasmagoria than a coherent narrative. Much of the movie follows a janitor at an asylum, but as he too begins to experience strange visions of madness the question is raised as to whether he is himself an inmate. The final scene where he puts smiling masks on all the inmates then dons a mask himself - not smiling - promotes the question rather than resolve it. The movie also suffers from feeling dated by comparison to American or European films of the same vintage. Still, it's an interesting study of a nation learning and exploring the language of film, if you like such things. E: and that's my 13 films done and 13 challenges completed in order. I have a couple of cheap, probably terrible movies picked up from the £3 bin at HMV that I might watch before month's end.
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May 26, 2022 18:26
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8. Dead Heat (1988)   The Price is Right challengeA strange series of robberies where the robbers seem to be immune to any sort of physical damage rocks Los Angeles. Detectives Roger Mortis (get it?) and Doug Bigelow are on the case. One of them is a no nonsense old fashioned cop the other a wisecracking goofball; they're loose canons but they get results. While investigating Dante Laboratories Roger is killed but his buddy puts him in a machine that can resurrect the dead. Now the two have only 24 hours to solve the case before Roger's necrotic undead flesh decays totally. Simultaneously a paint by numbers Buddy Cop action comedy and a balls to the walls zombie effects fest. The highpoint of the film, aside from the very entertaining final shootout where a very battle scarred zombie cop takes on zombie henchmen and they just stand there and empty hundreds of bullets into each other with no effect, is when the heroes visit a butcher shop in Chinatown and all the carcasses come alive. Everything from organs to frozen slabs of meat to chicken heads attacking them in unison. There are some fantastic make-up and special effects on display and a lot of it is very creative. Like one of the first zombies we see is a big bulky biker guy but for some reason the undead hulk has three faces crudely merged together. No one comments on this and it is never explained. Most of the other zombies are just dudes in varying states of decay but for some reason one of them is a proper hideous monstrosity. The main weakness of the film is that it's very stupid. Joe Piscopo is also at best annoying as the loudmouth comic relief partner. Vincent Price is in it but he's only in it for a moment and doesn't really share screentime with any of the main characters we only see him on a video tape lying in bed and dying and then he does show up at the end to give a proper Vincent Price villain performance but I don't think he's ever in the same shot as any of the other main cast aside from the evil coroner . There's a few elements of the story that don't really make sense but it doesn't really matter because there's a lot of squibs and explosions and gore. 9. Mausoleum (1983)  When she was young Susan lost her family and stumbled into an old decrepit mausoleum where, drawn in by an eerie green glow, she encountered the sinister supernatural force of Nomed (get it?). Now she's 30, happily married and lives in a giant mansion. However demons from her past are literally coming back to haunt her. Susan, now possessed by the demon, begins to take out her anger against anyone who slights her. Starting by burning a drunken sexpest from a nightclub alive in his car but soon moving on to people closer to her. Sometimes she does this through psychic powers levitating people off the ground and throwing people about or tearing them apart while her eyes play green and a ray gun sound plays but other times she's content to murdering them with gardening tools like when she sleeps with her sleazy unkempt gardener Ben and murders him right afterwards (but first we endure a very strange and drawn out montage of the gardener working, driving a riding mover around, taking a coffee break, sharpening his axe, and taking a nap). The gardener is oddly prominent for a minor character so much so that the actor playing him gets credited in the opening credits as "Maurice Sherbanee as The Gardener" when no one else does*. At the end of the film after Susan has defeated her inner demon her psychiatrist walks up to a cloaked figure and orders the figure to keep the mausoleum sealed as his forefathers have done for generations. Then the camera pans around and this mysterious Crypt Keeper who was in on it the entire time turns out to be Ben the Gardener who looks straight into the camera and laughs. What this means I have no idea. I think he's supposed to be the cloaked shadow we see explode a dude's head in the opening scene but that might be someone else also. Susan also steals a very kitschy and cheap looking painting from a mall art gallery. A painting so kitsch that her husband becomes mad at her for having the painting in the house. During these various murders she gets naked a lot, her boobs almost being characters in their own right, especially in her final monster form where the breasts become two snarling fanged monster faces. Which is interesting from a psychosexual standpoint. I feel like I should mention Elsie the stereotypical Black maid who flees the house in terror as soon as she witnesses something creepy, complete with comedy music, in a scene that feels almost like it could be from a 1940s Mantan Moreland film. Well technically she sees something spooky runs to notify her boss but since he's already gone she downs some strong booze while spouting dialogue like "Great googly moogly!", "No more grievin' I'm leavin'!"and "Lord have mercy! I ain't been this nervous since I been Black" then she runs out of the house never to be be seen again. It's what modern man would call "Problematic". In short: Barely coherent schlock but with some very impressive and creative effects. I get the feeling the rest of the film was only put together to serve as filler between effects and boobs. *The actress playing young susan gets and "Introducing:" credit but that's a lot more justified than the dude who plays the creepy gardener being so prominently credited.
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May 26, 2022 18:52
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3. Black Sunday Like many I had seen the classic opening to this film in completions and documentaries and what have you but I never seen the whole thing. It’s maybe a little rote to call it mesmerizing but I really love that foggy fairytale atmosphere. It’s a visually amazing film. I am a sucker for anything to hits a dreamlike tone and Black Sunday just nails it. It’s historically important, carefully made by an icon, and endlessly influential. A real treat and while I enjoy watching some horror in May, I can’t wait to revisit in October.  4.5/5 4. Evil Dead II  I had to revisit after I revisited the first in the series earlier in the month. Just like with Evil Dead I, there isn’t much to say that hasn’t been said- an essentially perfect horror film that never ceases to fulfill my desire for looney-tunes shenanigans covered in blood and latex. I will always waffle between which is my favorite, I think I currently like Evil Dead I the best but really who cares. They are both masterpieces and Raimi is my soulmate. 5/5
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May 26, 2022 21:39
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15. Shadow of the Vampire (Challenge 5: Behind the Screams) At this rate, my wife will have seen every single Nosferatu remake (or whatever you'd call this) before watching a single minute of the original. I'm pretty sure the setup went something like this: Nicolas Cage hired the director of the weirdest art film of the late 80's to round up the weirdest actors of the late 90's (who weren't named Cage) to make a film about how weird auteurs have always been. 16. Christine  (Challenge 12: All Hail the King) Gorgeous nighttime shots? Unparalleled practical effects? A script that isn't afraid to be silly? Yep, this is a classic Carpenter movie alright. 17. Deep Red  (Challenge 6: The King in Yellow) I've seen the scene with the dummy more than a few times and I really thought the whole movie would feature that weird lil guy. Instead we have to get our weirdness from the Goblin soundtrack, which never quite matches the tone. Why does every dark investigation scene have a score that implies we are about to either break out a bong or see a Scooby-Doo chase? Man, I hate modern fake blood. Using red acrylic paint is more fun in every aspect.
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May 26, 2022 22:17
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9/13: Short Films The third "season" of Love, Death & Robots dropped on Netflix this month, which isn't really a TV series but an anthology of sci-fi animated shorts. Plenty of horror shorts in there to add up to an hour's viewing.  Bad Travelling (21 minutes) Taut and vicious. The slight unreality to the proportions of the nearly photo-real rendered humans really helps sell the vibe of an old nautical monster story, something horrifying to tell by lamplight. Good writing, wisely paced, with gory seasoning; just a sharp example of a horror short firing on all cylinders.  / 5 Night of the Mini Dead (7 minutes) Hysterical. What a stupid simple concept, basically an Alvin and the Chipmunks voice remix of a zombie uprising and it turns out that's the funniest poo poo in the world to me. Dumbfuck laughs at a breakneck pace that had me crying laughing.  / 5 Swarm (17 minutes) Swarm is a clever twist on the concept of mindless alien hives, and offers exactly nothing beyond its premise. It's a classic science fiction move in the worst possible way to have the big moment in your story be one long stream of talky exposition. It's supposed to flow like setup, conflict, climax, not Swarm's awkward commitment to setup, faint sliver of disagreement, additional explanation. Always feels a little mean to dump on an animated short that clearly had tons of effort and craft spent on the lavishly detailed visuals, but it's a waste of talent to put that much polish in on a weak talking heads piece.  .5 / 5 In Vaulted Halls Entombed (15 minutes) A lame try at making sparks by rubbing soldiers going full Tom Clancy "Cover front! Tangos neutralized!!" up against Cthulhu stuff. The eldritch prison depicted is a gorgeously imagined space, with an appropriately awesome sense of scale, but then the elder god rattling chains in there is so frickin' basic!! C'mon guys, if you wanna be Lovecraftian, then aim for "indescribable" instead of "the exact same Cthulhu we've seen before." That poo poo was banal enough that South Park did a lazy riff on it, over ten years ago. In Vaulted Halls Entombed does have comedy going for it, though. The soldiers it depicts are so committed to tactical realism that it becomes hilarious to see them calling out ops jargon as they try to kill a swarm of bitey spiders by shooting some bullets. I busted up laughing when a dude with most of his skin and intestines gnawed away fell off a bottomless cliff, did a full-on Titanic propellor bounce off a rock, and the Emotional Lady Soldier still whined "I could have helped him!" Watching people get clowned because they don't know what story they're in is the true joy of a violent genre mash-up.  / 5 Jibaro (17 minutes) Mesmerizing. Director Alberto Mielgo kills it again, had me sitting totally enthralled wondering what the gently caress I was going to see in the next moment. Incredible use of contrasts to create a dreamlike atmosphere: balletic grace into frantic violence, intense close shots with shallow focus and wild motion falling away into figures being surrounded by the still forest, interplay between metal and flesh. Animation achieved to the fullest where every aspect of design, sound, camera and motion are all used to the utmost. Capital-A Art.  / 5And as a chaser, something completely different:  Aliens: Ride at the Speed of Fright (8 minutes) Made for a theme park motion simulator attraction, the kind of thing where the seat bucks you around according to what you're seeing on screen. As a film, it's just a low-budget lightning speedrun of Aliens without the charm. Turns out if you boil everything down to the formula simplicity of space marines + xenomorph + blue-gray ruins, what you get is really only fit for a literal amusement park ride. Fun nostalgia, though. I rode this as a kid and had forgotten it because I was so spooked that I closed my eyes through half of it!  / 5
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May 26, 2022 23:38
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Movie #19 - Mothra (1961) I've seen Mothra vs. Godzilla but never the big moth lady's solo film. This came out the year before Godzilla vs. Kong and just looks so much nicer, there's some great non-monster shots here. A combination of Godzilla's atomic trauma and King Kong's look at the exploitation of the natural world for the sake of cheap showbiz dollars, this is a film that's not afraid to get weird and play it straight, with colorful alien plants and 12-inch tall telepathic women. Mothra herself being a guardian goddess of the Earth who wakes when needed to protect her faithful gives her a very different vibe from Godzilla's less focused rampage. I was surprised that we didn't even see her in her larval form until halfway through the film! We're already at a point in this world'a continuity where giant monsters are a matter of fact and it just gets stranger from here. The miniature buildings and vehicles work for me even when it doesn't look at all real because the shot composition is strong. The miniature toy people used when they can't fit a green screened actor in, though, that's just terrible. Adult Mothra is a great design and Larval Mothra just rules. There's a few bits where the film really could use some trimming for pacing sake, but overall a great monster movie.
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May 27, 2022 05:48
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15. Torn Hearts From Blumhouse TV and Epix comes this 90ish-minute film where an upcoming country music duo seek advice from an ex-singer of a sisterly duo (and sole survivor of it) played frequently unsettlingly by Katey Sagal (aka Leela from Futurama), and they find out the hard way that this particular person shouldn't be giving advice. Cunning, creepy, and sabotaging, Sagal plays the two against each other for selfish reasons unveiled dramatically in the final 20 minutes This story's nothing new to say the least, the only unique being that it's country-music (if you're a fan you may like the songs that get played throughout, if you're not you'll hate it; I don't mind the genre so it was whatever) and it hinging entirely on the performance of Sagal, who to her credit doesn't disappoint, constantly keeping both on edge by being menacing in subtle ways (frequently tapping her finger when she's growing impatient with someone who just genuinely wants to hear from someone they like) and unsubtle ways (plate-tossing at heads, shooting bullets around people to get them running faster or in other directions) It didn't surprise me, it killed time. It didn't bore me. If someone other than Sagal had been in this role, that last part may not have been the case. A noticeable and disappointing step-down in quality from director Brea Grant coming off of 12 Hour Shift, which I'd definitely recommend instead if you have around the same time to kill *** 15/13+ (Presence 2022, Bitch rear end, Dawn Breaks Behind the Eyes, The Outwaters, Masking Threshold, When the Screaming Starts, The Abandon 2022, To the Moon 2022, Dawning 2022, La Pasajera, Pennywise: The Story of IT, Firestarter 2022, Escape the Field, Men 2022, Torn Hearts)
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May 27, 2022 06:13
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I really gotta grind out these challenges. And I have a backlog of reviews. But this is gonna be close. I don't think I'm gonna get them all.  40 (58). Vampire Academy (2014) Directed by Mark Waters; Screenplay by Daniel Waters; Based on Vampire Academy by Richelle Mead Watched on Netflix Return of the Fallen: 12/14 - Team YA That was not good. I don’t think it was the YA aspect that held it back really. I mean that stuff isn’t my thing and the basic outline of this feels very generic and familiar. It feels like it takes pretty liberal from other vampire stuff (and a little bit of Harry Potter) and just drops that into a YA setting. So instead of just regular aristocratic vampire whatever it’s that in high school. And a seemingly inappropriate old vampire teen girl relationship because yeah. I guess we need that too. The real issue to me though feels like its got about as clear a case of “stuffing the suitcase” book adaption as anything I’ve seen. Now I’ve never read the book so I don’t know what was taken from it, what was left out of it, what was twisted. But the whole thing feels so rushed and dense and comically paced. Like its just this exhausting run of exposition dumps and story beats and world building just nonstop. Hell even the dialogue feels like its getting rushed through and delivered faster than feels normal. Zoey Deutch’s main character Rose is obviously supposed to be sharp and clever and all but its like she never breaths. The film never breaths. Nothing has a second to sink in. Things are foreshadowed and delivered in back to back scenes. As soon as someone is done dropping some important story element the scene ends quickly and jumps to the next one of someone dropping some story element. Its all rather silly and nonstop. Now I’m saying I wanted this thing to be a 3 hour epic or anything… but it feels like it almost had to be to be done right. There just seems to be so much world and story and character stuff in there and the film tries to get it ALL in. A good adaption either needs time or needs someone able to cut what you can cut and focus where you need to. There’s no focus in this movie at all. Its all over the place and that means nothing really feels like it matters and half the stuff that happens feels like some kind of joke. The incredible awkwardly timed and comically filmed sex scene is really a testament to it. Its not shot comedically at all. Its clearly meant to be sexy. But its also just so out of nowhere and rushed that its absurd. And there’s the cliche YA element of a big school dance that you’re supposed to build to and then have a big character moments and story turn in… and it all lasts like 5 minutes? It was over before I even realized it. Sex dress reveal, some dance stuff, story beat drop, over. Done. OUT! This whole film feels like it started at somewhere between 2 and 3 hours and they just chopped up every single second of non-exposition to get it down to 100 minutes. The most interesting (and funny) thing is some blink and you miss it world building stuff about vampire history. I couldn’t care less about tired stupid vampire royalty nonsense. But I really want to hear more about this Vampire Christian religion build around Saint Vlad. That poo poo sounds hilarious. And for the life of me I don’t know if its intentionally funny or just that dumb but I’m almost tempted to read the book to find out. I’m actually mildly interested to see that there’s a tv adaption coming. I don’t know that I’m gonna rush to watch it but I am kind of curious if this story is any better if it has time to breath and to build depth. But man, this is a busy mess.  41 (59). I, Frankenstein (2014) Written and directed by Stuart Beattie; Story by Kevin Grevioux and Stuart Beattie; Based on I, Frankenstein by Kevin Grevioux Watched on Netflix. 13 Frankenst13ns: 9/13 I didn’t hate that. I actually really like the foundation of it. Its all kind of weird but in a fun way. The movie actually scored major points with me right off the bat by just doing a faithful prelude of the full Shelley story as the creature’s origin. Like not a lot of adaptions go that faithful but here this weird one was, and I respected that. And then almost immediately it follows that with vampire demons and gargoyle angels without a shred of easing you in or transitioning. And I respected that too. “Here’s the old story, now we’re telling a new story.” Ok, I’m on board. And the idea is kind of cool. Taking these kind of underutilized but classic monsters in gargoyles who are traditionally “guardians” and making them a kind of analog of Angels… or like the grunt soldiers Angels and Heaven posit into war? Its kind of a cool idea that seems filled with potential. And they actually look pretty good. The CGI here isn’t the best you’ve ever seen but its not the kind that ages ugly either. There’s a lot of it in here and while it doesn’t quite look real its kind of smooth in its own world. And I’ve always liked the idea of playing around with the Creature and his morality and destiny. He’s man created by man which has so much divine and religious potential for storytelling. And is he a monster? Is he just an animal abandoned and reflecting back the cruelty given to him? So what happens if he’s had some time to grow and learn and experience something else and get perspective? What happens if his uniqueness puts him into situations with real monsters? I like it. There’s a lot here in theory. Unfortunately I just don’t think the film really does anything with the concepts here. Right off the path after introducing its whole world it like jumps forward 100 years, and I’m not even that sure why. Like did this have to be set in modern times? All you would have had to do is change some of the science. I guess you’d have to build or CGI some different sets but like you weren’t filming on location, were you? I dunno. Its not a big deal but it feels like the first signs of the films problems. It just jumps past 100 years of the Creature’s character development or the Gargoyles/Demons war or anything. And then like… they’re pretty much just identical when you get there so… why? Ultimately this very much seems born of that era of Underworld type movies. People had figured out how to do impressive monster action stuff so they were doing it, but they weren’t really interesting in making horror movies or telling much in the way of stories. It was a big CGI showcase in an action film and monsters were just the easiest way to do that or something. And like there’s probably an audience for this, or at least was. Its all actiony and fast and a little mindless but in a perfectly fine popcorn way. But there’s nothing there. And there feels like there could be something here. Maybe not some deep great film. This is a B film at its core. But it could have been a really good and interesting B film. But its like just kind of the shortest path to the destination. Frankenstein fighting Gargoyles fighting Demons. Bing bang boom. There’s no real need for depth here. There’s kind of a love interest/mad scientist/audience surrogate in Yvonne Strahovski? Eh, she can fill all three roles. You cast a woman known for doing action in a non action role? Whatever. It doesn’t really matter. They could have just told the story without her too. There’s like these two Gargoyles played by Theo James and Caitlin Stasey (who I like and was kind of pumped to see since she’s not exactly a star) and they’ve got this romance/moral subplot… but its just kind of glossed past and that doesn’t really affect the story either. Its all just kind of noise. Its ok noise though. Nothing world changing. Probably wasted potential but not really something I’m gonna think about as wasted beyond this review. Its all just kind of there.  42 (60). The House at the End of Time (2013) Written and directed by Alejandro Hidalgo Watched on Peacock GMM Challenges: 7/13 gey muckle mowser posted:
I really enjoyed this. The first horror film out of Venezuela? Certainly my first. You can definitely see some of the seams. Its a perfectly competent production but you can see its on a budget. There’s some iffy old lady makeup for example that you just kind of have to roll with, and the lighting on this is kind of off (and probably just largely natural). But you get past all of that pretty quickly because its just a very well done little cozy spooky story. And its kind of the perfect mix of familiar feeling but also very unique and original. This isn’t some straight haunting. There’s a little more there to it and the movie doesn’t really let you in on it for a good long time. Its curious structure of showing different points of Dulce’s life and piecing the story together kind of gradually goes from that familiar place of the old haunted house story to something a little more complicated and not as straightforward. And then when the poo poo hits the fan and you really find out what’s going on… its weird. Not entirely shocking because its one of those good kind of “twists” where its not done to shock but just all kind of makes sense once it happens. You don’t say “ohhh!” you say “ahhh”. Which I think is just better storytelling, and its a lot harder. Anyone can make an unexpected twist. All you have to do is mislead your audience and then do something crazy. But dropping clues and pieces all come together in the end is a skill not everyone can do and Hidalgo does it well here. Now the idea is a little weird and while it makes sense I’m not entirely sure on its own I would have bought in. But really its a means to an end. This is really ultimately a story about love and loss. Its there all along in that familiar way, about a mother who has lost her family to something evil but no one has ever given her comfort or understanding and she’s never been able to mourn or understand what truly happened. And like you know by the end she’s gonna come face to face with what happened and get some kind of closure, but the path it takes is very different and plays out in a different way. It becomes about what a mother will sacrifice for the love of her children. And it goes beyond her to a real cycle of love. The little symbol of the pearl being passed around in unconventional ways from one person to another as a sign of love ends up being really good and smooth in the end and standing out for the finale. I see they’re gonna remake this with Hidalgo and like… I know not everyone likes that idea but I’m actually kind of into it here. Because there’s a great structure here but I feel like maybe there’s some limitations on not just because of the budget but also just experience and skill. And this does feel like a story that could be done a little better and a little tweaked and really elevate to the next level to a truly great film. Still, I liked this and I think its really good, especially for a first film. I’m curious to see what else Hidalgo does, although the reviews from his second film are harsh. But I am curious. There’s unquestionable talent here and a good story and performances. And in the end just a really solid spook-a-doodle.
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May 27, 2022 06:45
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15. Broadcast Signal Intrusion (2021) (first viewing) While archiving tapes for a local television station, our protagonist learns about some past incidents in which the signal was hijacked and bizarre footage was broadcast (think the Max Headroom broadcast piracy incident). He begins looking into the incidents, which slowly begin to take on a sinister air when he learns that a woman went missing the day before each incident--including his own wife. This is set in 1999, which informs the way the investigation plays out. The internet does play a role by way of bulletin boards spreading rumors, but he can't just look the footage up on YouTube. He get stonewalled when he learns the FBI and FCC investigation means key tapes were confiscated, and there's mostly a lot of shoe-leather detective work involved as he tracks down sources. There's some good atmosphere here for awhile, but it does kind of peter out after a certain point. --- CHALLENGES: 1. Woodlands Dark and Days Bewitched The Blood on Satan's Claw (1971) 2. Scream, Queen! Death Drop Gorgeous (2020) 3. 4. Music of the Night Nocturne (2020) 5. Behind the Screams Horror Noire: A History of Black Horror (2019) 6. The King in Yellow The Fifth Cord (1971) 7. Short Cuts (various short films) (misc) 8. A Perfect Getaway Baskin (2015) 9. Hidden Gems 12 Hour Shift (2020) 10. The Price is Right House on Haunted Hill (1959) 11. Horror Noire Tales from the Hood (1995) 12. All Hail the King 1922 (2017) 13. Sins of the Past The Wolf Man (1941)
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May 27, 2022 07:13
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Working through that backlog Wolf Like Me (2022) Written and directed by Abe Forsythe Watched on Peacock I was thinking this was a sitcom and would be like a nice little palette cleanser between heavier films. Its not a sitcom. I mean there’s definitely a rom-com aspect to it and Josh Gad and Isla Fisher are both charming and fun. But drat its kind of a super sad movie. And like I call it a movie because that’s what it really is. Its 180 minutes and its really just a bit of a long movie. This definitely wouldn’t have worked as a 3 hour film so breaking it up at whatever level of production it was turned into a 30 minute 6 part miniseries was probably the right idea. It might only work in this particular format, although you probably could cut out enough stuff to get down to 120 minutes or so if you really wanted to. And maybe that would have been better. But I dunno. I’m rambling. Its a charming and solid little whatever. I ended up watching the first two episodes nearly a week ago and then kind of forgetting about it and binging the rest on a rough day where I really didn’t have the energy for anything too heavy. This actually is probably too heavy. Its deep on grief and suicide and depression. And it handles those ideas well. At its core its a story about a bunch of people who need help who find each other and form a support family against the supernatural odds. The werewolf thing honestly could be the thing you cut from this. I mean its the core hurdle for this relationship and without it maybe they just get together easier. But that hurdle is only really there for like 30-60 minutes or so… or one act. So you probably could have done something else there. But they did a werewolf so… you know. Its here. Yeah, I dunno. I liked it. Everyone’s very good and give a lot of depth to these characters. And its a good little story with a mix of sadness and hope. Its a story that wants to be happy even if its struggling. Maybe its a little long and I really don’t know what to make of this curious little structure. Nor do I really know if I want to see a second season which is apparently coming. I mean I probably will watch it. I like everyone and its nice enough. I guess it kind of feels a bit like Santa Clarita Diet. Not quite as good as that but the same kind of odd but charming horror melodramatic sitcom. An odd little sub genre I can’t think of too many other examples of. Its not exactly good enough to spark copies or anything and I wouldn’t call it a must watch by any measure. But its solid and I enjoyed it. And I’ll probably come back.  43 (61). Midnight Kiss (2019) Directed by Carter Smith; Written by Erlingur Thoroddsen Watched on Hulu Spook-A-Doodle Challenges: 8/13 gey muckle mowser posted:
That was fine, I guess. If you like slashers you'll probably get more out of it. Its a pretty standard slasher just with a cast of gay characters. There’s maybe an element of gay culture in there with the social dynamics and motivations for the killings but like you could do that with straight people too. There’s no deeper theme here but that’s ok, right? Not everything has to be a tragedy, maybe progress is just generic gay slashers? And this is a perfectly competent one. The characters are fine and the performances are fine and the kills are fine and the story is fine. Its all fine. I wasn’t exactly shocked by the killer but what can you do? The film does its share of red herrings and tension builders. Its all competently done and totally fine. Like I said, if you like slashers its probably a lot more fun. I just am not a big fan. And this film is unapologetically gay. Like its just totally all out gay and that’s cool. Maybe not a particular plus for me but I can absolutely see why it would elevate the film for some. And like I said, its cool that there’s just sexy generic slashers for everyone now. You do you. More of that stuff. But you know… its still kind of a generic slasher and I dunno. I’m just meh about slashers and don’t have much to say about it.  44 (62). Resident Evil: Welcome to Raccoon City (2021) Written and directed by Johannes Roberts Watched on Starz Man I wanted to like this. This is my second video game adaption in as many days and still in the “I’m having a rough couple of days and need something not too heavy and kind of dumb escapism.” And I was really kind of excited for this. I’ve never actually played the video games but I’ve seen the Milla Jovovich movies and even though they’re up and down and kind of a mess they’re like dumb fun when they work and the dna seems fine. And I love this cast. Its not a big name cast by any means but its like an all star team of B actors working out of Vancouver filmed genre shows. Kaya Scodelario from Crawl, Robbie Amell from The Babysitter, Hannah John-Kamen from Killjoys and Ant-Man and the Wasp, Tom Hopper out of Black Sails, Donal Logue and Neal McDonough out of every fun thing they do. I even saw Darryl out of Letterkenny in there. Its just this weirdly stacked cast of recognizable B actors I enjoy so I was really excited to see them just let loose and fight some zombies and weirdo monsters. Unfortunately it never really feels like it delivers on the potential here. The whole thing just feels like an unfocused mess more interested in fitting stuff in from the video games than just telling a story. Now I don’t mind fan service. I’m a fan of lots of stuff and I get a kick when I see something I recognize and like. Its fun. But that should be flourish worked into a movie, not the thing you build around. The problem with adapting video games or comics or novels is you’ve got TONS of stuff that fans probably want to see in the movie but you can’t do all of that. You just need to pick something and focus on it and tell a story. Because if you don’t you just get this mess of stuff that feels forced in. “Stuffed into a suitcase” as Stephen King calls it and then nothing really sticks. And video game adaptions seem especially bad for this. Maybe because they’re already visual mediums so there’s lots of stuff that stand out? Maybe because they have these built in audiences so the filmmakers thing they really need to cater to them? Maybe because they deem the audience as unselective so they think they can just churn these out quick and easy and make their money without putting more energy in than necessary? I dunno. But this feels like a fan film. Which is fine. Its a well made fan film. But its got no real story. It should be simple. Long lost sister shows up in town to reunite with her brother right as poo poo hits the fan and they and their rag tag group have to fight through the nightmare. But it feels like there’s so much random stuff and characters. Zombies are kind of barely even a thing. Like they’re there but they’re clearly not the focus. And like that licking monster thing shows up but just once and then he’s gone. And then there’s this other monster that just shows up for the finale. And like there was no real build for it or anything. The characters kind of just finally got together so it feels like things almost just got started. But oh, here’s a new monster and I’m sure video game players recognize it and all and that’s cool. But like… whatever. Its all just a lot of noise at this stage. And hey, here’s mid credits scene with more references and another character. And look, I’m a MCU fan. I’m not saying I don’t see the appeal of a random character and tease of something in the future in a mid credit scene is. I’m a hypocrite and this just isn’t a source material that appeals to me. But any adaption needs to be able to stand on its own as a film. All that extra stuff should be extra. When you build a movie around that stuff squeezing as much of it in as you can you just get something like this. A jumbled mess of characters and references you have to speed past to get to the next one. If you just focused a little you probably could have had a fun little film that everyone could get. But I dunno. Its still fine, I guess. More dumb mindless action to distract me. This has all the makings of a fun horror action film. I like the look, the cast, the overall more horrory vibe than the Anderson films. But i dunno. It just doesn’t turn those parts into anything especially good or memorable. I don’t even remember how Darryl died. Get it together.
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May 27, 2022 07:36
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 Old I always like to use the May Challenge to take care of some stuff I missed the previous year and Old fit the bill. To be honest, I went in with extremely low expectations, and so I suppose the movie did exceed those expectations. There is some fun to be had in learning the "rules" of the beach and exactly how things work and the ideas the characters come up with to work within those rules. The characters are also pretty strong, the performances were solid all around, no major complaints there. Obviously this is a Shyamalan film and at this point we know what to expect from him in the last act. Old is a bit different in that he doesn't set you up to expect one thing and then pull the rug out from under you. No, this is more of a consistent mystery that the characters are trying to solve and then you eventually do get the answer at the very end. Unfortunately it's a pretty dumb answer and also kind of a non-answer, so I can't say it was very satisfying. This is a case where I think Shyamalan would've been better off weaving the answers in throughout the film, giving the audience a taste of the answer to push them to the next plot point. Anyway a lot of people seemed to hate this movie so like I said, it did exceed my expectations but that doesn't mean it was good.  The Sadness This is the opposite situation, I went in with pretty high expectations and the movie was solid but didn't quite reach those expectations. The gore showcase aspect of it felt a bit over the top to me in certain moments, and I felt it overwhelmed the movie's ability to actually have a story. And the over the top nature of the gore scenes I think actually took away from them somewhat, there were fountains of blood and everybody is just completely soaked in blood and at a certain point I have a hard time even discerning what's happening. Still the movie has a frenetic energy to it, the lead performance is very good, and there is some creepy and unsettling imagery/moments that definitely make the movie worth checking out. I just felt like it didn't hit the tone exactly right to be able to reach it's full potential. A bit more restraint would've made it a lot scarier. 1. Intruder 2. Spookies 3. Subspecies 4. Megalodon Rising 5. The Spine of Night 6. Eyes of Laura Mars(Hidden Gems) 7. Prophecy 8. Diary of a Madman(The Price is Right) 9. El Dia de la Bestia 10. Blood & Flesh: The Reel Life and Ghastly Death of Al Adamson(Behind the Screams) 11. Old 12. The Sadness
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May 27, 2022 15:50
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  6. The King in Yellow- Watch any giallo or giallo-influenced film 11. All the Colors of the Dark (1972) Okay so I admittedly don't like 99% of giallo movies but this one at least has a Satanic cult and some trippy visuals which are two of my favourite things in cinema. It's a decent twist with some enjoyable red herrings along the way which is half the battle in these types of films. The male co-lead being what you'd imagine a man in a 1970's cigarette advert in a magazine would act like if he were to come alive is typical of the genre - there's not too much going on outside of the setup for the mystery. It's fine, it's better than most. 3/5   9. Hidden Gems- Watch a film from Franchescanado's Letterboxd list of Horror Film Hidden Gems 12. Trash Humpers (2009) VHS quality weirdness, it 100% belongs in a hidden gems list. I really like Harmony Korine's work and I just needed an excuse to watch this. It was disturbing on certain levels not many films reach - perhaps as an early 2000's kid exposed to gore videos and absolutely horrified by them I'm in a position where there's a little memory there of the way they really looked and played out. Everything that comes out of the characters mouths is creepy as gently caress whether it be weird noises, a lullaby or laughing. That loving laughing has been in my head since I saw it. The visuals became one of the strongest elements of the film - creating some haunting imagery on the regular. 3/5  11. Horror Noire- Watch a film with themes that predominantly relate to POC. You will need to write about these themes in your review. 13. Scream Blacula Scream (1973) The sequel doesn't quite live up to how good the original is, I was annoyed when I learned William Crain hadn't returned to direct - exploitation-film director Bob Kelljan instead takes over. The story of a great African man being dragged down into monstrousness by white European aristocracy was told better in the original - but the themes permeate in this with one scene in particular standing out; as Blacula takes on two pimps on the streets of L.A. - first with words ("you imitate your masters") and then with his fists. Pam Grier as a voodoo priestess sounds great but unfortunately she plays a helpless damsel for the most part, Blacula retains some quiet sadness in the powerful frame and brilliantly sympathetic yet powerful voice of William Marshall. Blacula's transformation owes a lot to the way Marshall would change his cadence and stance - a vamp who you would not want to gently caress with. 3/5  10. The Price is Right- Watch a film featuring Vincent Price 14. The Tomb of Ligeia (1964) Vincent Price wears cool sunglasses and haunts an old abbey where his first wife's body is kept. Another Corman/Poe film, this is the last one I had left to watch and I'm very sad I can't watch most of them for the first time now. It's a slow burn and feels a little thrown together especially at the end where a bunch of crazy imagery is thrown together and it features a lot of black cat wrestling - 99% of it was a fake cat but there's some scenes where that wee guy was not handled very gently and it made me enjoy less. Still, Price eats up the scenery and it's a cool story just feels a smidgen too little sometimes. 3/5   4. Music of the Night- OR watch a film that heavily features music and/or musicians as part of the plot 15. Climax (2018) Oh word, this features music and is horror alright. Another upsetting feature from Gaspar Noe as if we expect anything less. This kicks off with a really tight dance routine with a camera that floats around and captures it all in a really slick way, it's hard not to be impressed. What follows is a few scenes establishing the dance troupe, listening in to their hopes, desires and problems. Once it's revealed that an unknown has spiked the punch with acid the troupe rapidly descent into a baying mob and the music dominates the descent into hell with some amazing tracks to accompany the dancing and violence. Brilliant film. 3.5/5   8. A Perfect Getaway- Watch a film from a country you've never seen a film from. 16. Pulgasari (1985) A giant monster film from the 1980's that looks like it was filmed in the 60's. No idea how Kim Jong Il benefitted from this story of a small podgy boy eating a lot of iron and becoming the saviour of simple farmers across the land (before becoming a problem for the farmers) but here we are. The camp of Baby Godzilla imagery juxtoposed with some heavy crying and dramatic scenes of suffering at the hands of the king sure is something, I don't know if I really liked it. It's different in that it is a period piece and you don't see a big guy stomping on armies with spears and cannons very often. The copy I watched wasn't very good, it's on YouTube. At least I can say I've seen one film from North Korea and fill that space in my Letterboxd map! 2/5 Watched: 1. Horrors of Malformed Men (challenge 1) 2. Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (challenge 3) 3. Salo: 120 Days of Sodom 4. Last House on Dead End Street (challenge 5) 5. Sometimes They Come Back (challenge 12) 6. The Curse of the Cat People (challenge 13) 7. Fireworks /8. Invocation of My Demon Brother /9. Lucifer Rising /10. Das Clown (challenge 7). 11. All the Colors of the Dark (challenge 6) 12. Trash Humpers (challenge 9) 13. Scream Blacula Scream (challenge 11) 14. The Tomb of Ligeia (challenge 10) 15. Climax (challenge 4) 16. Pulgasari (challenge 8) 12/13 challenges complete
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May 27, 2022 16:25
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 #23. Hellboy Animated: Sword of Storms (The Roku Channel) Hellboy travels to ancient Japan to stop a possessed professor from unleashing a pair of demons from a magic sword, which will unleash chaos on the world. A cheap early 2000s animated direct-to-video movie, which should tell you everything you need to know up front. It's also an uneasy mash-up of Mike Mignola's art style and that ugly lumpy "Sensational Spider-Man" style, which should also tell you something. If that doesn't scare you off, just know that it's also flat, kinda dull and the fight scenes aren't all that special. (Plus, there's at least one scene where the "special effect" is flashing strobe lights, which is an unintentional seizure threat that they don't tell you about. So, uh... know that up front.) I think I reviewed the other half of this pair a few challenges ago, and that fared better, mainly due to the presence of a whole bunch of horror tropes (like vampire queens, werewolves, ghosts, bloody handprints on the mirror, etc.). This one trades in Japanese horror tropes, only some of which I understand at first glance; I know kappa and oni, I'm less sure where different sets of floating disembodied heads and the half-spider woman (looking like the spiderized Mohawk gremlin from Gremlins 2) came from. But there also was a fairly metal giant skeleton and zombie horde at the end, so that's something. In the end, this isn't the worst thing I've seen for this challenge - don't think anything is gonna top Firestarter in that regard - but it's still not that good. Okay enough as a time waster while I was working out, but not much more than that. I'd say Hellboy deserves better, and that having Ron Perlman and the rest of the Guillermo del Toro movie cast on hand helps alleviate the boredom, but those are both not totally true. As the big red guy himself would say, "Oh. Crap." /5Watched so far: Night of the Living Dead (1968), Escape Room (2019), The Company of Wolves (GMM Challenge 9), Shutter (2008) (GMM Challenge 3), bunch o' shorts (GMM Challenge 7), Black Sunday (1960), The Hallow (GMM Challenge 1), Dr. Strange 2, Madhouse (1974) (GMM Challenge 10), Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1941) (GMM Challenge 13), Memory: The Origins of Alien (GMM Challenge 5), Trollhunter (GMM Challenge 8), Friday the 13th Part 2 (SBLT Challenge), The Little Girl Who Lives Down the Lane, Firestarter (2022) (GMM Challenge 12), Happy Death Day 2U (GMM Challenge 2), The Editor (GMM Challenge 6), Anna and the Apocalypse (GMM Challenge 4), Bones (GMM Challenge 11), Men (2022), Intruder (1989), My Heart Can't Beat Unless You Tell It To, Hellboy: Sword of Storms
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May 27, 2022 16:34
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RobbZombae posted:Brilliant film. Dang, what words do you use to describe a 4/5 movie?
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May 27, 2022 16:52
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married but discreet posted:Dang, what words do you use to describe a 4/5 movie? Ohhh I did write a bit about how the upside down at the end really didn't work for me so it dropped out of being a TOP Noe film, for me. I deleted what I wrote because I wondered if it spoiled something; but thinking on it, I doubt it does. 3.5 is a really good rating!
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May 27, 2022 16:59
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 21. We're All Going to the World's Fair (2021) "Today I'm going to be taking the World's Fair challenge." What if someone made a horror movie but instead of typical jump scares and gore, the monster was loneliness and it gets you by reaching into your brain and pushing the buttons labeled "consider the impermanence of internet friendships" and also "oh no, men online!" Great lead performance, cool soundtrack, and I liked some of the interstitial bits a lot. Glad I am too old for this poo poo tbh. The worst we had was leaving emo lyrics in our MSN names or AIM away messages. 3/5 22. The Bird With the Crystal Plumage (1970) "Bring in the perverts!" Argento's directorial debut and something I've been meaning to watch for a while. Really slick, with a lot of scenes that hint at the stylish stuff Argento would do later (I mean, this is too, but you can also tell it is earlier than the most famous ones). Good twists, sharp knives and razors, black leather gloves, yeah baby that's a giallo alright. 3.5/5 -- 6. The King in YellowTotal Watched: 22 // GMM Challenges Complete: #13 (The Uninvited), #12 (The Tommyknockers), #11 (Def by Temptation), #10 (The Witchfinder General), #9 (Motel Hell), #8 (Kratt), #7 (replaced with Never Hike Alone: The Ghost Cut), #6 (The Bird With the Crystal Plumage), #5 (Shadow of the Vampire), #4 (Repo! The Genetic Opera), #3 (The Changeover), #2 (Penda's Fen), #1 (Kuroneko) My personal objective was 13+ new movies and this is 22, and I've done all the mod challenges, so I'm good for the month. I'll still watch stuff but I might not bother to post reviews if I get too lazy.
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May 27, 2022 18:06
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10) The American Scream (2012) I was really hoping the whole thing would be a wholesome look into these families who really love Halloween. Unfortunately, like any obsession, it really starts to feel sad after a while. 3/5 11) The Little Girl Who Lives Down The Lane (1976) Even though the story isn't much to write about, the acting from Jodi Foster and Martin Sheen puts this week into a high rating. Everything was just so uncomfortable and weird and I really got sucked in. 4/5 12) Nosferatu (1922) This was a rewatch for me, but my wife had never seen it. This version had a different score than the last time I saw it, and it was really just beautiful to watch. It's incredible what a difference a different score can make for a silent film. 5/5 quote:
gently caress me, what a bleak watch. Even before the movie got into the "murder" part of the plot, it was just so... dirty, and sad, and... bleak is the only word I can think of. I think that from a film perspective, it works incredible well and is incredibly effective, but I'm not in a hurry to watch it again. As far as the LGBT aspect of this movie, I think that was probably the worst (but one of the most honest) parts of it. At first the enemy was just "pedophiles", which we can all agree on being bad and worthless. However, another character dies for being effeminate and dressing femme. I think if it were just a film, not based in reality, it could have done some interesting things with the concept of vigilante justice, but... the truth is far more sad and far more homophobic. 3.5/5 Challenges done: 2, 3, 6, 8, 10 Count Thrashula fucked around with this message at 18:16 on May 27, 2022 |
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May 27, 2022 18:12
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Does a filmed stage production of a horror-related musical count, or does it need to be specifically made FOR the film medium?
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May 27, 2022 18:27
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 #24. They Live (Peacock) After stumbling onto an alien conspiracy, a nameless drifter battles the forces of capitalism with a pair of magic sunglasses. I hadn't seen They Live since Roddy Piper passed away, and forgot how good it was. It holds up really well, which is an indictment of how little we've improved as a society in the almost 40 years since it was released; it might also be the most straightforward representation of John Carpenter's politics, ending as it does with an almost nihilistic "gently caress it" before Piper goes out in a blaze of glory, upending the system as he goes. Seeing as it comes at the end of Reagan's second term, it's also perfectly positioned as the last gasp of Carpenter's ability to rage against the system and have it stick; once the Clinton years begin and America reaches a level pitch for an extended period, Carpenter's brand of counter-culturalism loses all of its bite. As for the rest of it - Piper is an effective protagonist, since his laconic Midwestern delivery fits to Carpenter's minimalist yet hokey dialogue really well. Keith David is always a treat, as is Buck Flower. I'm less sold on Meg Foster, who seems too bland and frigid to be an effective ingenue, which undercuts her position in the story somewhat. Speaking of story, that's generally the weakest element in most Carpenter scripts, and this is no different; it seems like he had a good idea of the setup and how to end the film, but didn't have a great idea on how to get from point A to point B. You can tell that, while the infamous Piper vs. David alleyway brawl is fun, it's a symptom of the film spinning its wheels and trying to think up a decent way to get David onto the good guy team. It ends up holding the film back from being one of Carpenter's best outputs, but even second-tier John Carpenter is better than most of the stuff out there. /5Watched so far: Night of the Living Dead (1968), Escape Room (2019), The Company of Wolves (GMM Challenge 9), Shutter (2008) (GMM Challenge 3), bunch o' shorts (GMM Challenge 7), Black Sunday (1960), The Hallow (GMM Challenge 1), Dr. Strange 2, Madhouse (1974) (GMM Challenge 10), Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1941) (GMM Challenge 13), Memory: The Origins of Alien (GMM Challenge 5), Trollhunter (GMM Challenge 8), Friday the 13th Part 2 (SBLT Challenge), The Little Girl Who Lives Down the Lane, Firestarter (2022) (GMM Challenge 12), Happy Death Day 2U (GMM Challenge 2), The Editor (GMM Challenge 6), Anna and the Apocalypse (GMM Challenge 4), Bones (GMM Challenge 11), Men (2022), Intruder (1989), My Heart Can't Beat Unless You Tell It To, Hellboy: Sword of Storms, They Live
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May 27, 2022 21:29
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16. Hatching (2022) (first viewing) A Finnish coming-of-age body horror fairy tale. Our heroine, Tinja, is a teenage girl who is being increasingly worn down by her domineering mother, who cares more about broadcasting her perfect family to her social media audience than she does about parenting. After her mother kills a bird that got in through the window, Tinja finds the bird's egg and decides to try to raise it on her own, but the creature that hatches is far from ordinary. The grotesque being only becomes more mysterious as it grows. Sometimes it seems to operate on animal instinct, sometimes it seems to have human cunning. Sometimes it seems like a manifestation of Tinja's inner mind, sometimes it seems like Tinja has direct control. There's some pretty good creature design, although the themes of adolescence, parenthood, etc., are a little superficial, and the movie runs out of ideas entirely by the end when they are literally just chasing the creature down to stab it with kitchen knives. But it's a debut feature-length film from director Hanna Bergholm, and there's enough to like to hope for the future. --- CHALLENGES: 1. Woodlands Dark and Days Bewitched The Blood on Satan's Claw (1971) 2. Scream, Queen! Death Drop Gorgeous (2020) 3. 4. Music of the Night Nocturne (2020) 5. Behind the Screams Horror Noire: A History of Black Horror (2019) 6. The King in Yellow The Fifth Cord (1971) 7. Short Cuts (various short films) (misc) 8. A Perfect Getaway Baskin (2015) 9. Hidden Gems 12 Hour Shift (2020) 10. The Price is Right House on Haunted Hill (1959) 11. Horror Noire Tales from the Hood (1995) 12. All Hail the King 1922 (2017) 13. Sins of the Past The Wolf Man (1941)
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May 28, 2022 04:16
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09. Night of the Living Dead (1968) "That's important, isn't it? To be right, for everyone else to be wrong" Somehow this was a first watch for me. I've seen the other Dead movies (except for Land), and the 1990 remake, just never got around to number one. Anyway, it was on Shudder, so I figured it was time. I was struck by the way this movie is shot. It's just so snappy and modern; I love the shots where the characters stay centred while the world whirls around them. And some really nice first-person shots, like when Harry's been shot and he stumbles into the basement, and it's all blurry and hosed up. The ending is perfect. It was one of the points that, in retrospect, the '90 version really fumbles, taking all the subtlety out of it (not that there was much to begin with). The hooks! Somehow I had never gotten spoilt on the hooks. And I recall that the 1990 version made it ambiguous whether Ben had been bitten, while in this one he clearly hadn't. Anyway, the whole credits montage is just so eerie, so upsetting; even if they get on top of the whole zombie thing, all the worst elements of society are ascendant in the crisis. Honestly I think it's the best one. I still need to see Land, which is meant to be interesting if not exactly good. And I gotta rewatch the Snyder version of Dawn, that was one of the first horror movies I watched (while WAY too young), and I need a refresher. Maybe in October. 5/5
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May 28, 2022 10:56
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 45 (63). Birth of the Living Dead (2013) Written and directed by Rob Kuhns Spook-A-Doodle Challenges: 9/13 Knockoffs of the 13 Dead: 8/13 gey muckle mowser posted:
That was a lot of fun. Very enjoyable and informative. I am of course a huge fan of Night of the Living Dead and oding on questionable remakes and homages this month with still more to come. So revisiting the making of it and this massive legacy this little indy production made is fun on its face. But the film just does a very good job telling the story of the production and letting me know stuff I didn’t really know. Maybe not world changing stuff but noticing actors pulling double duty as zombies or learning what their roles on the crew were. Hearing the stories of how this came to be made from the collaborative community get together of news crews, police, and locals who all just supported the local film production coming together for that final epilogue scene of the film to Romero explaining how they didn’t have the money to pay the sound guy so they had to bet the cut of the movie on a game of chess. Its really a story about how Romero really got in on the ground floor of guerrilla indy film making and somehow not only made a movie but one that just kind of changed the world. Its a pretty remarkable story worthy of a film when you think about it. The doc also gets into the social and political aspects of the film. The story long has been that Romero didn’t really intend to do race stuff with Ben and was doing a more thing against capitalism or whatever. Hearing it from Romero its all a lot more complicated than that. He was doing a film about revolution and the state of the country at the time but he doesn’t really seem to have any particular agenda in mind. Romero definitely seems left leaning and if he was trying to make a point he’d probably have his heart in the right place, but this all feels a lot looser than that. As one talking head said the film almost works to “both sides” since both the conservatives/olds/racists see the zombies as the rioters ruining things and the young progressives and civil rights movers see the mobs of mindless zombies and gun toting rednecks. And while Romero reiterates that he didn’t purposely cast Duane Jones as Ben or write the role for as a black guy its clear he was aware of to and they debated the best way to handle stuff like Ben slapping Barbara. Romero admits he actually wishes he had done more with the race stuff. Whether he was more ignorant and blind to its importance in his younger days or just too focused on making his guerrilla film to do massive thematic rewrites and change his vision I don’t know. But its all a very interesting insight into not just Romero’s thinking but also just the cultural impact of the film and Duane Jones’ leading man role that isn’t Sidney Poitier or Superfly. And of course there’s the impact on horror, not just in the long legacy of Living Dead films or the basic creation of a whole new monster that in 2013 they argue is like a top 3 monster but in a post Walking Dead world is probably just the #1 monster. To the point where a ton of people are just sick of it and need a break. Blame Romero if you must because he sure started something. But it also gets into how NotLD really changed the horror industry and maybe kicked it past the safe era of Vincent Price and Hammer matinee films to the more grind house exploitation era of genuine scares and hosed up poo poo you maybe didn’t expect to see. Roger Ebert’s review is fun because of the excerpt they take its not really clear if he liked the film or not. He just seemed shell shocked by it and his expectations of what horror were at the time and what you’d tell the poor kids who went to see this movie. Imagine that. A time when horror movies were just the thing you dropped your kids off to see on a Saturday afternoon and then some guy makes a nihilistic movie about people eating each other Its just a very good and enjoyable doc. I don’t think you need to love the movie to enjoy it. Its only really partially about the film. Its about films in general, the time, politics, the legacy on horror. Its not Making of the Living Dead, its Birth of the Living Dead. The birth of its legacy really. And not some retrospective of sequels and knockoffs either. It actually doesn’t touch on them at all. I’d like to see that doc but that’s not this. This has a much broader appeal I think and is just a good watch.  46 (64). Monsters vs Aliens (2009) Written and directed by Conrad Vernon and Rob Letterman; Screenplay co-written by Maya Forbes, Wallace Wolodarsky, Jonathan Aibel, and Glenn Berger Spook-A-Doodle Challenges: 10/13 gey muckle mowser posted:
”A genetically altered tomato was combined with a chemically altered ranch flavored desert topping at a snack food plant. The resulting goop gained consciousness and became an indestructible gelatinous mass.” This is a very cute movie. I love the setup. Taking all those iconic 50s B movie monsters and making the joke that the government’s just been storing them in a lab for generations and now they gotta go all Dirty Dozen/Suicide Squad. Its just a really fun idea and the movie feels like its at its best when its playing around with that. It loses that a little in the heart of the movie. Like the main plot is a pretty standard adventure story. There’s one really fun B movie twist late I didn’t see coming but at the same time the basic story beat wasn’t a shock and everything basically follows the course you expect. This isn’t gonna reinvent the wheel. But its fun and charming and wholesome and easy. Everyone’s kind of funny, the animation and voice acting all seems fine. I’m not a big animation guy so I’m not an expert on those things but it worked for me. Again, its nothing terribly new or exciting so some might find it dull. The whole thing feels maybe a little old school not just in the movies its homaging but in its whole style and story. Its a pretty straight forward Disney/Pixar/Dreamworks kind of story. But you know… that’s fine. I’m a little vulnerable right now and kind of burnt out on horror. So this was really exactly the kind of thing I needed. Sometimes i just want to smile and laugh. And this is exactly what it looks like. A standard family animation movie that happens to be having fun with some old school horror like Attack of the 50 Foot Woman, the Blob, Creature From the Black Lagoon, The Fly, and many, many, many UFO/alien invader movies. So many of them. Svengoolie would be proud.  47 (65). Night of the Animated Dead (2021) Directed by Jason Axinn Knockoffs of the 13 Dead: 9/13 ”Gus! Put down your sandwich! The dead are walking and want to eat our flesh!” “Stop it, Shawn. You’re not going to convince me there’s zombies just to steal my lunch.” Basically just an animated version of the original. Its not an exact copy. There’s a few things changed or added like a flashback to how Ben got to the house and some curious added gore. Its not really attempting to recreate exact shots or anything. Its like 98% faithful and just a little bit not. That could come off as just kind of sloppy I suppose. Like it would have taken more craft and time to try and recreate specific shots and match the film, but it also kind of does make this feel a bit more like its own thing and not just a straight recreation. Although that’s all it really is. And that’s a bit odd really. If this were just a cheaper thing you’d say “oh, whatever, its another cash in.” But this actually has a name cast of star voice actors. Sure it probably was an easy job for them but it also means someone probably paid some money or pulled some strings, no? Scream Queen Katherine Isabelle, cult star Katee Sackhoff, Josh Duhmmel and Will Sasso. Ok, I have no idea what Sasso is charging these days. Its not an A list cast but its something. But its not super clear what the point of this is. I mean I guess the point is just to make a cheap buck off of a color, animated version of a classic that a bunch of young people won’t watch because its old and in black and white and slow. That’s their loss but I guess there is an audience like that who would be more interested in this. That seems to be Jason Axinn’s started intention. “To make a classic more accessible.” Just without the “and make some money off something I didn’t have to pay rights to”. Its not really terrible. The animation isn’t anything special but I thought it was fine and it is kind of funny when you realize this is an unofficial Psych reunion with Dule Hill and James Roday Rodriguez. They really should have just gone all in on that and this would have been more interesting. Maggie Lawson as Judy, Corbin Bernsen as Cooper, Timothy Omundson as… Barb? Sorry, Lassie. This thought and imagining Shawn and Gus trading barbs through NotLD actually got me through a lot of this giggling. But like… I don’t really know why you’d watch this. Its not especially bad, its just not really got a point. I guess if you really do hate old black and white films and love animated gore then this is a serviceable version of the original. But its deeply inferior for obvious reasons and even a lot of the little changes they make like added gore or an extended sequence of Ben’s fate all kind of lose the nuance of Romero’s original. It reduces a deep classic full of subtextual themes and well paced and shot horror to a generic zombie story. And like… I guess I should be mad about that but whatever. The original is still the original. And compared to some fo the other knockoffs I’ve watched this month this one was entirely mediocre. And I did giggle at the Psych thing a bunch. ”AHHHHH!” “Gus, what happened!” “Shawn! You got the wrong key for the gas pump!” “Well give me the gun and I’ll shoot the lock!” “I’m not going to give you the gun! Then the zombies will get me.” “The zombies are coming for me too, Gus!” “But they’ll eat me first.” “Why would they eat you first? I’m right here.” “You know the black guy always gets eaten first, Shawn. Besides, they’re drawn to my coconut body lotion.” “Zombies are not drawn to coconut body lotion! They want human flesh!” “Everyone likes some seasoning, Shawn.” “That’s ridiculous, Gus. You can’t honestly tell me the zombies will eat you over me because they like coconut more.” “Well they might eat you because you’re so plump.” “Plump? Are you really calling me fat?” “Well I’ve been telling you to spend more time on the bike, Shawn.” “We are running away from zombies! I think I’m getting my exercise in, Gus!” “Sure, now, but too late to get rid of those appetizing love handles.” “I can’t believe you’re doing this to me right now.” “Well…” “Just shoot the lock, Gus.” I should watch Psych.
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May 28, 2022 13:00
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5. Behind the Screams
3. Rated PG
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Great, now I'm double posting. 48 (66). Children of the Corn: Genesis (2011) Written and directed by Joel Soisson King Spring II: 14/13 Why aren’t any of the Children of the Corn sequels actually about Children of the Corn? This is the 9th movie I’ve watched and there’s maybe 3 that feel like they actually read the original story and two of them are adaptions while the other was some kind of passion project from an original cast member. The rest of the sequels all just feel like random horror scripts that had a spooky kid in them so the studio had someone throw some corn and a farm into the story so they could extend their license on the Children of the Corn name. I swear, the most telling thing about watching all these movies is the realization that Stephen King probably learned a serious lesson from an early contract and that’s probably why even though there’s 100 King films there’s only a handful of sequels. King saw what happened when you let the studio reserve those rights. The story itself isn’t really terrible. Its a very mundane tale of a couple who get stranded and stuck in a creepy situation. Its not a bunch of kids with corn. Its like a creepy dude who might be a pedophile or something and his young sexy Russian wife who is making things difficult and stuff flying off shelves and allegedly a spooky kid that we never see. You see some corn husk dolls once or twice and someone name drops “He Who Walks Behind the Rows” once. But mostly its just Billy Drago being a little creepy and a young couple maybe making some bad decisions about staying at his place. There could be something there but it never really gets out of second gear and its clear WHY this script got a corn once over because it really doesn’t feel complete or like something that can stand on its own. Of course it doesn’t stand with the Children of the Corn add on either especially since its all so lazy and thin. The ending just kind of feels silly and like it comes out of nowhere. Like it feels like it undermines most everything we’ve seen to this point. Not contradicts but begs the question of what the point of any of that was. But really this movie isn’t worth thinking about more than I already have. Its short and mildly better made than most of the sequels and decently acted. But there’s just nothing there.  49 (67). The Girl Who Knew Too Much (1963) Directed by Mario Bava; Screenplay by Ennio de Concini; Enzo Corbucci; Eliana de Sabata; Mino Guerrini; Franco Prosperi and Mario Bava; Story by Ennio de Concini, Enzo Corbucci, and Eliana de Sabata Return of the Fallen: 13/14 - Mario Bava Spook-A-Doodle Challenges: 11/14 gey muckle mowser posted:
Billed as the first giallo film this really has more in common with Hitchcock than Fulci or Argento. That’s not a huge surprise. I hate giallo generally but I really like Bava, and he feels much less like a guy who is a product of waves and fads and more like the guy who kind of starts them by doing something a little different. So I can see how this film would kick off the giallo phase, or inspire Bava’s Blood and Black Lace a year later which seems like a truer giallo. Its got those beginning elements taken from Hitchcock’s style and those murder mysteries and given that odd, sometimes silly, Italian stylish spin. Its not as good as Hitchcock. The mystery all feels kind of silly and convoluted and I didn’t so much feel the tension as a result. Letícia Román does a solid enough job and you can see how this gorgeous woman wandering around Rome caught in this serial killer mystery inspired all those exploitative giallo movies’ leading lady roles. Bava doesn’t do that here. He’s got style and beauty in his film and Roman is at the center of that but it never feels cheap. And John Saxon is entirely fine as the lead without being one of those terrible pigs in those other giallo films. In a lot of ways I think I appreciate this most when I put it against giallo films because everything I hate about them is clearly potentially here but not. It ends up making me appreciate that Bava didn’t have to go there and that he still could shape something the rest just copied in a way I dislike. But the truth is the film just didn’t hook me. Its story is all a bit too silly, its cast is solid but not nearly as charming the leads in those classic Hitchcock movies, and while Bava shoots a gorgeous film as always it kind of just feels like a tour through Rome. Even Bava didn’t love this one and I don’t blame him. Its not bad or anything, and its clearly the start of something. But it also feel like a bit of a failed experiment. One that probably led him to his next experiment that spawned an entire sub era of film. But like… this one’s just a little off.  50 (68). Blackenstein (1973) Directed by William A. Levey; Written by Frank R. Saletri 13 Frankenst13ns: 10/13 Spook-A-Doodle Challenges: 12/14 gey muckle mowser posted:
I remember watching Blacula and being surprised because I was expecting it to just be a cheap and exploitative knockoff done poorly. Instead that film is actually really smart and something all its own, and over time I’ve come to realize that a lot of blaxploitation films were an outlet for talented black directors, writers, and stars to do something even if they had to degrade themselves a little in the process. So I’ve had a more open mind about these films since then but… well… this is just kind of crap. There’s nothing overly bothersome about this. As others have noted if you try REALLY hard you can probably make out a theme about the US’s discarding of vets, especially young black men. But you have to try really hard. That angle isn’t played up at all and really we spend no time on any character, story, or theme. Its all a very by the numbers and drab Frankenstein story with some blaxploitation flourish. I drifted off completely a couple of times, rewinded to see what I missed, and each time realized I really hadn’t missed anything. There’s just no meat in this sandwich. So yeah… I wanted to like this but its just not any good. The story, the acting, the pacing, the look. Half the scenes are just so dark and drab that I don’t make much out. Its not impossible to see. Its just all very lifeless. In the end this film feels very much like what I expected Blacula to be. A cheap knockoff done poorly.
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May 28, 2022 13:34
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Welp, I need to catch up a lot… [s3] Gorgon Hungary, 8m After stealing a woman’s purse, a pickpocket fleeing from a police officer breaks into a large scary looking house with dire consequences. Lovely animation, creative shots and engaging throughout, well worth watching.  [s4] Delusion Latvia, 2m Very short, feels more like a tech demo than a real short film. Some lovely cinematography and great make-up work though so an easy watch.    [2] Ilargi guztiak (All the Moons) Spain, 2020 A Spanish period piece / dark fantasy / coming-of-age movie about a young girl set in the Spanish woods during a civil war with stunning cinematography. Sounds familiar? Despite these strong similarities to Guillermo del Toro’s masterpiece Pan’s Labyrinth, All the Moons is more than able to hold its own and then some. Don’t expect a lot of action, and you’ll be rewarded with an extremely atmospheric movie, with strong performances and some of the most gorgeous looking shots I’ve seen in a while. Really, really good. Purno fucked around with this message at 21:42 on May 28, 2022 |
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May 28, 2022 15:36
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 #25. Slaughtehouse (1987) (Shudder via Joe Bob Briggs) The owner of a dilapidated slaughterhouse uses his mentally challenged son to enact bloody revenge on the people he thinks wronged him... and the teenagers who keep messing about on their property. Joe Bob Briggs introduced this movie last night as "cinematic junk food" - a paean to summer, that American season of excess barbecueing and general warm weather hedonism that extends from this Memorial Day weekend until Labor Day - and that's a fitting description: low calorie, no healthy benefits, something to mindlessly consume and then forget about, possibly feeling vaguely queasy afterwards and disappointed in yourself for not making better choices. He also spent a lot of time talking about the history of the hot dog and the process of making the sausage, and that also pertains to this film: grind up the leftover parts of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Halloween and Friday the 13th and jam it all into a sickly skin of hicksploitation, mentally challenged-sploitation, poverty-sploitation - really, any -sploitation subcategory they could get their hands on - and there you have it. Slaughterhouse, in all its grubby, nasty, nonsensical glory. Like any cheapie non-franchise slasher movie pumped out in an attempt to try to cash in on the dying embers of that craze, Slaughterhouse does pretty much nothing new and won't bother with things like characters or plotting or logic. They put a little bit into gore effects, but not a ton - a scene where a deputy gets a hand chopped off and bleeds out is okay, but I don't remember much else in the way of effective effects. Joe B. Barton is decently utilized as main antagonist Buddy Bacon, but the fact that he can't speak or do anything but make pig-like squeals neuters his ability to be a true character; he cuts an imposing enough figure, but the filmmakers never learned the key lesson of "don't overexpose your main villain" from movies like Alien or Jaws or smaller human-level threats, as in Halloween or TCM, so Barton's near-constant presence ends up undercutting his menace by the end. (Dan Barret fares better as the unhinged father figure Lester; none of the players matter worth a drat.) I see why Briggs picked it as an ironic, sardonic choice for Memorial Day, but that doesn't mean I was gonna give his pick my undivided attention, either. I found myself getting bored pretty quickly and reverting to half-watching, half-idly playing games on my phone, waiting for Joe Bob's intrusions to wax rhapsodic about processed meat and the trials and tribulations of filmmakers trying to pump out a small horror film with whatever resources they could find, to jump start a career that ended up not panning out at all. I don't often long for the Joe Bob interstitials in these cases, but it's not like the film had a great flow that we were messing up by pulling our attention away. This is probably the best way to experience this particular film; it needs all the help it can get. Like that one hot dog that's been left at the back of the 7-11 rollers for too long, so it's just caked in oil and grease and shame - you probably won't even like it in the moment, and you're drat sure gonna regret it later. /5Watched so far: Night of the Living Dead (1968), Escape Room (2019), The Company of Wolves (GMM Challenge 9), Shutter (2008) (GMM Challenge 3), bunch o' shorts (GMM Challenge 7), Black Sunday (1960), The Hallow (GMM Challenge 1), Dr. Strange 2, Madhouse (1974) (GMM Challenge 10), Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1941) (GMM Challenge 13), Memory: The Origins of Alien (GMM Challenge 5), Trollhunter (GMM Challenge 8), Friday the 13th Part 2 (SBLT Challenge), The Little Girl Who Lives Down the Lane, Firestarter (2022) (GMM Challenge 12), Happy Death Day 2U (GMM Challenge 2), The Editor (GMM Challenge 6), Anna and the Apocalypse (GMM Challenge 4), Bones (GMM Challenge 11), Men (2022), Intruder (1989), My Heart Can't Beat Unless You Tell It To, Hellboy: Sword of Storms, They Live, Slaughterhouse (1987)
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May 28, 2022 17:01
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I am far behind where I wanted to be on both watching and logging, this month has been crazy. Among other things, my boss suddenly quit (or got fired, honestly not sure what drama happened) and I've had to put in a lot of extra hours. Plus my sister and her kids decided to make a last minute trip to visit from the other side of the country, which is actually great but it's hard to watch horror movies when you're hanging out with a 6 year old. 19. The Fly (1986) (dir. David Cronenberg) blu-ray re-watch A classic. Jeff Goldblum is iconic and maintains a great mix of charming and creepy. Geena Davis is also good and the two play well off each other. Some parts of this have pacing issues - nothing too egregious, but at only 96 minutes I think the story could’ve used a little more fleshing (heh) out at times, especially in the first 2/3rds. This is a minor complaint but I do think it holds the film back from being quite on the level of Videodrome or Dead Ringers. The last act though, hoo-boy. There’s good stuff throughout the film (I reflexively yelped during the arm wrestling scene even though I’ve seen this multiple times), but the ending is Cronenberg at his most Cronenbergian. Some of the most repulsive body horror and amazingly goopy practical effects of the ‘80s. Love it. 5 inside-out monkeys out of 5  20. The Carrier (1988) (dir. Nathan J. White) YouTube A small town is afflicted with a mysterious disease that causes people to instantly begin to melt when they touch a contaminated surface. The source seems to be some kind of werewolf or monster or something that attacks the main character Jake during the prologue, but then the movie seems to forget about that scene and never mentions it again. Our first glimpse of the effects of the disease comes when a man’s arm is “eaten” by a Dr. Seuss book. Egged on by a local priest, a mob mentality takes hold over the townsfolk and they go kinda nuts, wrapping themselves in garbage bags and fighting to the death over herds of cats. This is lousy in pretty much every way. The acting sucks, the dialogue sucks, and the story makes no sense. I’ll give it a little credit for being memorably strange, and it generally avoids being completely boring just because everything that happens is so bonkers, but the weirdness alone isn’t enough to save this from being dull overall and I can’t say I enjoyed it. 2 cats out of 5 Total: 20 Watched: The Exorcist | Exorcist II: The Heretic | We're All Going to the World's Fair | Irreversible | Amsterdamned | Woodlands Dark and Days Bewitched | We Have Always Lived in the Castle | Valerie and Her Week of Wonders | Hollow Man | Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness | Broadcast Signal Intrusion | The Spine of Night | Anaconda | Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives | The Sadness | The Exorcist III | Mill of the Stone Women | Graveyard Shift | The Fly | The Carrier
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May 28, 2022 17:34
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16. The Dead Zone Definitely more thriller than horror, a man gets into an accident and develops psychic powers to see the future when he touches people. Walken is more subdued than I expect when I see his name pop up. Martin Sheen plays the evil counterpart to his West Wing character. It was an enjoyable watch, at times tense but never super tense. Challenge #12 All Hail The King 17. Slaughterhouse 80s horror movie that’s basically Friday the 13th, Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Motel Hell all smashed together into an uneven mess. But it was a fun mess to watch, teetering between super gory camp and sometimes taking itself seriously enough to try for some tense moments that never quite land. The effects were goopy and effective though. 17/13 Movies: What Have You Done To Solange?, Kadaicha, Frankenstein Created Woman, Night Of The Living Dead (1990), Straight Jacket, Slaughterhouse Rock, It Came From Outer Space, The Changeover, The Body Snatcher (1945), Anarchy Parlor, Cruising, Found Footage 3D, Whoever Slew Auntie Roo?, The Skeleton Key, The Tingler, The Dead Zone, Slaughterhouse 9/13 Challenges: #1 Woodlands Dark (Kadaicha), #2 Scream Queen (Cruising), #3 Rated PG (Skeleton Key), #4 Music Of The Night (Slaughterhouse Rock), #6 The King In Yellow (Solange), #8 A Perfect Getaway (Anarchy Parlor), #10 The Price Is Right (Tingler), #12 All Hail The King (Dead Zone), #13 Sins Of The Past (Body Snatcher)
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May 28, 2022 17:41
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 21. Don't Kill Me (2021) (dir. Andrea De Sica) Netflix I was mostly on board with this for the first maybe 10-15 minutes - teenage Mirta is dating a guy named Robin, who is basically an Italian knockoff Edward Cullen except instead of a moody vampire he’s a moody junkie. They get high together and both OD at the same. After her corpse is laid to rest, she returns to life and has to smash her way out of her crypt. So far so good - some of the scenes have a sort of grimy neon aesthetic that I’m a sucker for, plus an electronic score that seemed promising. It gets dumb real fast though and most of what I was enjoying disappears and is replaced by young adult angsty romance crap. Mirta learns that she is now an “overdead” who must feed on living humans to survive. She meets others of her kind and also learns that there is a secret society of overdead hunters who will track down and kill anyone like her. Oh and Mirta is special and really strong or something, because this is a generic YA story and the protagonist always has to be the chosen one or some poo poo. I dunno what her deal is honestly, I was fully checked out by the one hour mark. This wants to be an Italian Twilight so bad but more or less completely fails at that goal. Twilight loving sucks too, so it’s kind of impressive that this film manages to be worse in every way. Mostly just generic and dull and occasionally dumb, but not in a fun way. Don’t waste your time. 1 and a half wasted hours out of 5  22. Young Frankenstein (1974) (dir. Mel Brooks) Amazon re-watch Possibly my favorite comedy of all time. So many classic bits, and with the exception of a couple of scenes towards the end, the humor has aged gracefully and is still hilarious today. Gene Wilder is brilliant of course, but Madeline Kahn, Cloris Leachman, Marty Feldman, and really the whole rest of the cast are also stellar. The exchange between Wilder and Leachman where he is trying to go to bed and she keeps offering him drinks (“…Ovaltine?”) is a masterclass in comedic timing. Plus it’s such a loving spoof of the Universal Frankenstein films - it absolutely nails the look and feel and the jokes are never at the expense of the source material. I’ve seen this movie many times since I was a kid but it wasn’t until a few years ago that I realized how much it pulls from Son of Frankenstein, possibly more so than the original film. That makes sense of course given the premise, but Brooks and Wilder pull from all of the original films and it feels like they really respect them. 5 rolls in ze hay out of 5  23. Underworld (2003) (dir. Len Wiseman) HBO Max Unknown to humanity, a secret war between vampires and werewolves has been raging for centuries. The vampires mostly have the upper hand, but when the werewolves suddenly take an interest in a human named Michael for unknown reasons, a vampire warrior named Selene (Kate Beckinsale) begins to uncover a plot that could change the tide of the war. This is very early 2000s. Lots of uncomfortable looking leather outfits, Matrix-style shootouts with wire-fu fight scenes, mediocre CGI, nu-metal music, and a color palette that ranges from “light grayish-blue” to “dark grayish-blue”. I wouldn’t go as far as to call it an ugly film, because there are some fun set designs and it has a kind of goth aesthetic that I like, but it does look flat and at times nearly monochrome. Much like the films in the Resident Evil franchise, this is a dumb but passably entertaining action/horror film. Michael Sheen and Bill Nighy bring some class to the production and I think without them this would be considerably duller. Fun enough for what it is! 3.5 leather pants out of 5 Total: 23 Watched: The Exorcist | Exorcist II: The Heretic | We're All Going to the World's Fair | Irreversible | Amsterdamned | Woodlands Dark and Days Bewitched | We Have Always Lived in the Castle | Valerie and Her Week of Wonders | Hollow Man | Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness | Broadcast Signal Intrusion | The Spine of Night | Anaconda | Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives | The Sadness | The Exorcist III | Mill of the Stone Women | Graveyard Shift | The Fly | The Carrier | Don't Kill Me | Young Frankenstein | Underworld
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May 28, 2022 17:48
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 [s5] Manicure Bosnia and Herzegovina, 5m Not the best looking, but a simple yet off-putting visual idea can really come a long way. Fun.  [s6] Folk Tales Poland, 24m An African immigrant seeking a better life in Europe ends up in a secluded Polish village. This didn’t really grab me; it drags at times and while it is well shot, when the action kicks up the visual style best resembles an early 2000s nu-metal video.    [3] Baskin Turkey, 2015 Challenge 9: Hidden GemsThis has been on my watchlist for a long time, and I finally got it out of the way. Wow. I’m not really sure if I get it all, but it is a captivating watch and from when they enter the house it has some of the best escalation and oh-poo poo moments I’ve seen in a long time. Afterwards it did lose me a little when things slowed down, but I mostly blame that on being very tired. All the more reason for a rewatch sometime soon. Purno fucked around with this message at 21:41 on May 28, 2022 |
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May 28, 2022 18:15
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 10/13: Disturbia Likely the most aggressively mid-aughts film there ever was, with its soundtrack of Nada Surf, Kings of Leon, and System of a Down, and dialogue shout-outs to Xbox Live, iTunes, Martha Stewart's house arrest, and custom ringtones. I wanted to like Disturbia. It has a cute self-aware start where a sappy father-son fishing trip gets interrupted with a brutal car crash, and then we get to watch Shia LaBeouf unravel from there, lashing out and ending up in house arrest with nothing to do but stare at his neighbors all day. At heart this is just a stupid teen movie version of Rear Window, but the worst kind of stupid teen movie, dumb without style or charm. Bad performances from everyone except David Morse as a possible killer, tepid dialogue, an ugly void where cinematography and lighting should have been, and it even fucks up the rhythm of its own voyeur premise by showing to the audience whether Morse is actually dangerous when LaBeouf isn't looking. The ambiguity of his limited perspective is the whole point, why squander it?  .5 / 5 11/13: Cast a Deadly Spell And on the other end of the charm spectrum, here we are! Goofy, majorly charming detective noir pastiche with content and tone both heavily inspired (lifted, if you're feeling mean about it) by Who Framed Roger Rabbit. Instead of living cartoons, the gimmick in Cast a Deadly Spell's version of 1940s L.A. is ubiquitous magic, realized by a delightful menagerie of practical effects work. They were so proud of that gargoyle that he shows up in the finale just to do a rah-rah cheerleader routine on top of a house! It's not a landmark technical achievement of the medium the way Roger Rabbit was, but given this was an HBO original with a tenth the budget, it's amazing how much bang they got for their buck. What was in the drinking water at the end of the '80s that made people want to do lighthearted takes on noir, literally by name one of the darkest genres around? Cast a Deadly Spell adds witchcraft and even Old Gods to the formula of dames, murders, and double-crosses, but it's clearly all a lark. Maybe the chain of receiving the material secondhand had finally stretched too long, the way that a lot of people my age are more likely to recognize old movie tropes or Peter Lorre's face from the Looney Tunes rather than ancient source material. Whatever forces shaped the vibe, Cast a Deadly Spell is clearly made with affection, visible in the first shot of Fred Ward where the camera makes love to him lighting up a cigarette in a way that's as out of fashion as fedoras. Great fun.  / 5
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May 28, 2022 19:07
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 [s7] Islands France, 23m Directed by Yann Gonzalez (from Knife+Heart) this is very much in the same style. Three interconnected stories about sex and death with a dreamlike flow. Visually striking, a great soundtrack and very well directed.    [4] Playdurizm Czech Republic, 2020  Challenge 2 Scream, Queen!Demir is a gay teenager living in a fantasy world where he is roommates hot British movie star Andrew and his girlfriend. Waking up one morning with amnesia he spends most of the movie along with the viewer figuring out what is going on and what is real or not. Visually lush, queer as hell story about identity, masculinity and dealing with trauma. When things come together in the end it does a great job of switching tones, resulting in a true gut punch of an ending.
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May 28, 2022 21:40
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gey muckle mowser posted:
 20.) Troll Hunter ( Trolljegeren ) André Øvredal | 2010 | HBO Max (Country:  This was a cool film. Some of it didn’t quite work for me, like I really didn’t care that much about the students but the troll hunter himself was cool. The premise itself was pretty neat and I thought that the battles with the trolls were well-done (the UV gun was pretty inventive). Rating: ½ gey muckle mowser posted:
 21.) Green Room Jeremy Saulnier | 2015 | Kanopy This movie was great! Very tense with some cool gore and I think Patrick Stewart’s performance as the head of a group of skinheads was excellent. I saw some reviews compare it to Texas Chainsaw Massacre and I have to agree. There are also some surprisingly funny moments as well, such as the final scene. I had been meaning to watch this for a while so I’m glad I could cross it off my list. Rating: ½  All Challenges Complete! Total: 21/13 New: 18 Rewatches: 1 Challenges: 1. Woodlands Dark and Days Bewitched (Men), 2. Scream, Queen! (The Lost Boys), 3. Rated PG (Saturday the 14th ), 4. Music of the Night (Green Room), 5. Behind the Screams (Birth of the Living Dead), 6. The King in Yellow (The Bird with the Crystal Plumage), X. SECRET BONUS LIMITED TIME CHALLENGE (Friday the 13th Part 2), 8. A Perfect Getaway (Troll Hunter), 9. Hidden Gems (Night of the Creeps), 10. The Price is Right (Dead Heat), 11. Horror Noire (Tales from the Hood), 12. All Hail the King (Firestarter (2022)), 13. Sins of the Past (White Zombie) My Letterboxd list (in progress)
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May 29, 2022 04:13
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17. The Innocents (2021) (first viewing) During lazy summer days in the playgrounds and woods outside their apartment complex, a group of children slowly learn they have burgeoning telekinetic and telepathic powers. The premise is fantastic, but the consequences are realistic in that the film understands the casual cruelty that would come from handing these powers to children too impulsive and too immoral to know what they are really doing. There is a good "we're not loving around here" scene early on, and a few more punchy moments throughout. They also hit a home run with finding good child actors--quite impressively, all four seem to be making their acting debuts according to IMDB. The film is admittedly pretty slow, and the actual plot is pretty simple for a two-hour runtime, although I did find things to feel deliberate and engaging rather than just dull. Director Eskil Vogt also often works as a screenwriter for fellow Norwegian Joachim Trier. I also liked the duo's Thelma, a somewhat Carrie-esque tale. I haven't seen the non-horror The Worst Person in the World but I know it's been enormously well received.) --- CHALLENGES: 1. Woodlands Dark and Days Bewitched The Blood on Satan's Claw (1971) 2. Scream, Queen! Death Drop Gorgeous (2020) 3. 4. Music of the Night Nocturne (2020) 5. Behind the Screams Horror Noire: A History of Black Horror (2019) 6. The King in Yellow The Fifth Cord (1971) 7. Short Cuts (various short films) (misc) 8. A Perfect Getaway Baskin (2015) 9. Hidden Gems 12 Hour Shift (2020) 10. The Price is Right House on Haunted Hill (1959) 11. Horror Noire Tales from the Hood (1995) 12. All Hail the King 1922 (2017) 13. Sins of the Past The Wolf Man (1941)
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May 29, 2022 07:04
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 [s8] Lurking Near Greece, 21m A man goes into the woods to set trails, but while he’s there he notices that he’s not alone. Completely dialog free, very atmospheric and nice shots of dark woods. Not very original but well executed and never dull despite its length.  [s9] Catcalls Ireland, 8m A man asks 2 women on the street for directions only to expose himself to them. A simple story of a perv getting his comeuppance. It manages to create some tension in a short amount of time, and the monster design is cool.    [5] Bumperkleef (Tailgate) The Netherlands, 2019 I’m normally not a big fan of movies from my home country. I don’t know what it is but I am way more critical of acting performances when they’re in my native tongue. That said, this was surprisingly good. A man and his wife and kids are in a hurry to get to a family gathering, on the highway he tailgates a guy in a white van who turns out to be a psychopath and comes after them. At first I was a little put off by how much of an rear end in a top hat our protagonist is, but that is very much the point. Everything could’ve been avoided if he just apologized but his ego prevents him from backing off in front of his wife and kids. The ending not being a big standoff with the bad guy but him crying and naked under the shower is quite appropriate.
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May 29, 2022 15:51
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10. Dead of Night (1945)  Sins of the PastWalter Craig arrives at a quaint British country cottage for work but to his confusion and terror he realizes that the house and all the people in it, though previously total strangers to him, have been the subject of a reoccurring nightmare he's had for years. The sceptic of the group, one doctor Van Straaten, thinks this is impossible but the others try to convince him by telling stories about their own eerie or paranormal experiences. One of the first horror anthology films ever. It's interesting how fully formed the format seems to be for so early in it's history. The stories are of varying quality but none of them is actively bad and the framing story is one of the best I've seen in an anthology and is just as intriguing as any of the stories. The first story is told by race car driver Hugh Grainger and revolves around a near death experience followed by a premonition of death. A dark omen that allows him to escape a much worse accident. It's very short and has a very Twilight Zone vibe, despite predating that show by years. A good start to the film. The second story is told by teenager Sally O'hara and is about a Christmas game of hide and seek that ends when she has a surprise encounter with the ghost of a murdered child. When this first started I was expecting it to be an adaptation of A.M. Burrage's Smee, a classic and very creepy ghost story about people encountering a ghost while playing hide and seek at a Christmas Party but I was surprised when this went in a very different direction. In Smee the ghost is never actually seen directly but felt and heard. In this story the ghost is a adorable mopey child. Not very scary for a ghost story and probably the weakest story of the bunch. The third story is told by Joan Courtland and revolves around a haunted mirror she gave her husband when they first got engaged. There are no literal ghosts but the mirror shows an entirely different room than it is present in, a room in a much older and grander style, and seems to have a big affect on her fiancés mood and personality making him much more agitated and jealous. It's a interesting concept for a story and well executed and I'm a big sucker for haunted/cursed objects. The fourth story is told by the host of the gathering and owner of the cottage: Elliot Foley. This story is a bit unusual in that it's very overtly a comedy and the supernatural elements are a lot less subtle. It concerns two golfers who are competing for the affections of the same girl, they decide to have a game of golf to decide who gets her but one of them cheats and the loser drowns himself. But soon after he returns from the grave to haunt his rival, mostly through annoying him at golf by moving the ball around. It's very silly and goofy and probably funnier to 1940s audience's than to modern tastes but it got a few sensible chuckles out of me. The fifth and final story is the best and a foundational work in the subgenre of creepy ventriloquist dummy. It is told by the skeptical atheist doctor about a case in which he assisted where a ventriloquist tried to murder a colleague because he thought his rival was trying to steal the dummy. The story makes sure to keep it very unclear whether the dummy is actually alive and orchestrating all this or if it's just the imagination of the ventriloquist. Very spooky story with some great acting and fantastic evil dummy action. Having such a strong framing story makes the film feel a lot more cohesive than a lot of later horror anthology films. Even the silly golfing ghost bit works in the fiction of the film because the character telling it is obviously trying to lighten the mood and make his new guest feel less freaked out by all of this. I highly recommend all of you watch this if you haven't already. I've already watched film 11 and will probably tackle 12 and 13 on the morrow.
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May 29, 2022 19:51
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FreudianSlippers posted:Having such a strong framing story makes the film feel a lot more cohesive than a lot of later horror anthology films. Even the silly golfing ghost bit works in the fiction of the film because the character telling it is obviously trying to lighten the mood and make his new guest feel less freaked out by all of this. I'm honestly shocked that no later adaptions have just flat-out lifted the style of the framing story and used it to make their own movie better. The closest I think has ever been done is Ghost Stories (which is also brilliant) but it's surprising that so few entries into the genre have bothered to put much effort into it, and into doing any work between the characters in the wraparound.
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May 29, 2022 21:56
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| # ? Jun 3, 2024 16:12 |
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 Candyman (1992) I just got the Arrow UHD and had to watch is this weekend and figure I'll watch the other movies as well since I have never seen them yet. The first film here I actually watched the Arrow non-UHD fairly recently but this one has the UK cut which I have not seen which apparently has a single extra shot where blood sprays on Helen's face so that's pretty underwhelming. Candyman is a solid film, a true classic, what really elevates it though is Virginia Madsen and Tony Todd's performance. I love the scenes with Helen where she seems totally hypnotized by the Candyman, enraptured, terrified, powerless. Candyman is such a great villain because he has deeper motives he isn't just a slasher and he definitely isn't a madman and to say he's only interested in belief and worshippers is an oversimplification. He's also completely unsympathetic. It would be a cop out to say based on his speculative origin that he's only a vengeful spirit, white people killed him wrongfully and were supposed to feel bad for him while he takes revenge, but it has no bearing on anything it's just part of his legend that makes him real and gives him power but doesn't define his persona. In any case, Candyman could have been a rote film about a hook handed dude that kills people but it's very deep, not only because of the characters but it's also about racial and economic disparity and abusive relationships, a film that's greater than the sum of it's parts. 5/5  Candyman (2021) This is one of those movies where I could go on about all sorts of poo poo on how bad it is I don't know where to begin. It's a completely disjointed mess of a film. They try to make some social commentary but do a horrible job and go nowhere with it so it feels meaningless and shoehorned in. The whole inclusion of Candyman in the film was done extremely poorly, like, apparently in this Candyverse they have Candymen and you can get Candified and anyone can be a Candyman but AT THE SAME TIME the whole lore of the first film remains? If you're going to try to do a new thing AND not have Tony Todd as Candyman anyways then why not just do a complete reboot?? Now, everyone knows what happens when you say Candyman five times he shows up and kills you. In the first movie Candyman singled out Helen because she didn't believe in him and was telling others to not believe in him, not because she said his name five times. In this movie there's no tension because you know exactly what's going to happen because stupid people keep saying his name then he shows up and kills them. Besides the Sherman Fields Candyman that's killing everyone is not the Tony Todd Candyman he has no agency, no thought, no beliefs, no motive, he's just completely loving pointless. 0/5  Candyman: Farewell to the Flesh (1995) In the first film, Candyman is an urban legend, the posh a-hole guy goes into his backstory but the thing is we don't know if that's real. Is it a complete fabrication? Did Daniel Robitaille really exist? Is Candyman actually this guy or is he a manifestation based on peoples belief. Which came first, the legend, or the man? I'd like to think it's obvious based on knowing Clive Barker but Candyman is not a real person he's a folk tale become a modern day god that lives in a mysterious place on the fringe of society. This film completely misses the point of Candyman all-together they say yes Daniel Robitaille was real but not only that he has literal blood descendants so there is absolutely no ambiguity to this. Not only that but they completely removed the sexual symbolism of Candyman when he penetrates his victims with his 0/5  Candyman 3: Day of the Dead I didn't know what I was getting into but these sequels are so bad and I really did not want to watch this movie. Unsurprisingly its loving terrible but beyond that it's a scummy film. I can't say that Donna D'Errico is a bad actress cuz she's not an actress at all someone cast this person, a playboy playmate, in the leading role, and *unironically* thought it was a good idea. Either that or she was banging a producer or a producer wanted to bang her, I don't know. I do think it's funny they did the movie in LA because you know these people all live in LA already they couldn't even be assed to leave the city to make this movie. Candyman, famously a film about black people, previously set in Chicago and New Orleans, so for the third film lets make it about mexican people in Los Angeles? 0/5 TheMopeSquad fucked around with this message at 01:17 on May 30, 2022 |
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May 30, 2022 00:45
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