r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

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teen witch: Oct 9, 2012

Arsenic Lupin posted:

"Disney is a religion" lady just kept on going like the Longines Symphonette.

It doesn�t rest

# ? Jun 7, 2022 19:55

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# ? May 28, 2024 14:59

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

So am I to understand that Mickey and Minnie just hold hands in bed?

EDIT: And sleep with their gloves on?

# ? Jun 7, 2022 19:55

Xlorp: Jan 23, 2008

Pope Corky the IX posted:

So am I to understand that Mickey and Minnie just hold hands in bed?

EDIT: And sleep with their gloves on?

Well, knowing what's inside those gloves isn't exactly fingers...

# ? Jun 7, 2022 20:03

Danaru: Jun 5, 2012; 何 ??

Phuzzy posted:

I (25F) screamed at my Chinese MIL, who is living with us indefinitely and is also undermining most of our parenting choices. I am afraid our relationship can't recover from this. How do we move forward?

When I imagined myself in this situation, the only solution I could think of is to walk into the ocean

# ? Jun 7, 2022 20:07

Halloween Jack: Sep 12, 2003; I WILL CUT OFF BOTH OF MY ARMS BEFORE I VOTE FOR ANYONE THAT IS MORE POPULAR THAN BERNIE!!!!!

Skutter posted:

A combination of IOSM thread and this one. "You shouldn't be mean to Disney adults because they treat Disney like a religion so that makes their behavior okay"

The part of the Disney Adult thing that I just can't wrap my head around is Mickey Mouse, specifically. It's been pointed out that the people who scramble to defend MCU movies from Martin Scorsese are just as deranged, and that's true. But at least those movies are made for people over the age of 6.

You can't even compare it to, say, Sesame Street, because Mickey is way more recognizable as a corporate mascot than as a character who actually appears in shows. Would you pay thousands of dollars for the Michelin Man to show up at your wedding? How about Tony the Tiger? I ate a lot of cereal when I was a kid and it was there with me through some tough times.

# ? Jun 7, 2022 20:39

Captain Hygiene: Sep 17, 2007; You mess with the crabbo...

Halloween Jack posted:

Would you pay thousands of dollars for the Michelin Man to show up at your wedding?

INFO: Could I call him in to run around body-checking people when I'm ready for the reception to be over?

# ? Jun 7, 2022 20:41

Splicer: Oct 16, 2006; from hell's heart I cast at thee
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Halloween Jack posted:

How about Tony the Tiger?

There are a lot of people who'd like Tony the Tiger at their wedding but not for the reasons you were thinking.

# ? Jun 7, 2022 20:42

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

Captain Hygiene posted:

INFO: Could I call him in to run around body-checking people when I'm ready for the reception to be over?

INFO: same question except mickey mouse

# ? Jun 7, 2022 20:44

teen witch: Oct 9, 2012

Halloween Jack posted:

Would you pay thousands of dollars for the Michelin Man to show up at your wedding? How about Tony the Tiger? I ate a lot of cereal when I was a kid and it was there with me through some tough times.

Now that you put it that way, I would like Chester Cheeto to officiate the wedding.

yes I will be someone�s dangerously cheesy wife someday

# ? Jun 7, 2022 20:45

DaysBefore: Jan 24, 2019

We all look forward to seeing your wedding story on r/relationships, tw

# ? Jun 7, 2022 20:47

Halloween Jack: Sep 12, 2003; I WILL CUT OFF BOTH OF MY ARMS BEFORE I VOTE FOR ANYONE THAT IS MORE POPULAR THAN BERNIE!!!!!

Captain Hygiene posted:

INFO: Could I call him in to run around body-checking people when I'm ready for the reception to be over?

You could probably hire a retired hockey player for less.

# ? Jun 7, 2022 20:48

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

What�s Terry Tate up to these days?

# ? Jun 7, 2022 20:49

trickybiscuits: Jan 13, 2008; yospos

Phuzzy posted:

I (25F) screamed at my Chinese MIL, who is living with us indefinitely and is also undermining most of our parenting choices. I am afraid our relationship can't recover from this. How do we move forward?

Bringing the MIL over (DURING A PANDEMIC) was such a horrible idea that I can't remember the rest of the post.

# ? Jun 7, 2022 20:51

teen witch: Oct 9, 2012

DaysBefore posted:

We all look forward to seeing your wedding story on r/relationships, tw

I want Chester Cheeto [31, witch], he wants Saruman [47, grouch] at our wedding

E: hah, an age gap on the house for you

# ? Jun 7, 2022 20:52

Batterypowered7: Aug 8, 2009; The mist that chills you keeps me warm.

teen witch posted:

I want Chester Cheeto [31, witch], he wants Saruman [47, grouch] at our wedding

Genderbent Catgirl Saruman

# ? Jun 7, 2022 20:53

BOOTY-ADE: Aug 30, 2006; BIG KOOL TELLIN' Y'ALL TO KEEP IT TIGHT

poisonpill posted:

Things I�ve learned from this thread
1. Pranking culture has destroyed modern people�s ability to have any kind of formal event

2. Dating partners with major red flags either show them in 3-6 months, or just after a major commitment (moving in, marriage, pregnancy)

3. Opinions about bike safety, rice cooking, and personal hygiene are among the most boring things to read in existence

4. If a coworker, stranger or anyone you aren't acquainted with asks very personal questions, you're required to give them ALL your past history, or else you're a big fat liar liar pants on fire

teen witch posted:

Now that you put it that way, I would like Chester Cheeto to officiate the wedding.

yes I will be someone�s dangerously cheesy wife someday

Neon orange, yellow & black sounds like a pretty rad theme, not gonna lie

# ? Jun 7, 2022 20:53

Runcible Cat: May 28, 2007; Ignoring this post

teen witch posted:

I want Chester Cheeto [31, witch], he wants Saruman [47, grouch] at our wedding

E: hah, an age gap on the house for you

Saruman's up for it if you pay him in butter:

(Yes, his name's Saruman.)

# ? Jun 7, 2022 21:06

feedmegin: Jul 30, 2008

Seth Pecksniff posted:

Guarantee you that this dude was only respected because the military forced it on his subordinates, not because they actually liked him

...that is literally how militaries work, yes.

# ? Jun 7, 2022 21:18

Splicer: Oct 16, 2006; from hell's heart I cast at thee
🧙🐀🧹🌙🪄🐸

teen witch posted:

I want Chester Cheeto [31, witch], he wants Saruman [47, grouch] at our wedding

E: hah, an age gap on the house for you

According to r/relationships formatting rules both you and your swain are genderless and ageless, Chester Cheeto is a witch, and Saruman is an extremely rough looking 47.

# ? Jun 7, 2022 21:19

CharlestheHammer: Jun 26, 2011; YOU SAY MY POSTS ARE THE RAVINGS OF THE DUMBEST PERSON ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH BUT YOU YOURSELF ARE READING THEM. CURIOUS!

feedmegin posted:

...that is literally how militaries work, yes.

Nah there are commanders who are respected but they are pretty few

# ? Jun 7, 2022 21:21

teen witch: Oct 9, 2012

Runcible Cat posted:

Saruman's up for it if you pay him in butter:

(Yes, his name's Saruman.)

If he�s good with other cats, he�s in. Butter all around!

Splicer posted:

According to r/relationships formatting rules both you and your swain are genderless and ageless, Chester Cheeto is a witch, and Saruman is an extremely rough looking 47.

Yeah sounds about right

# ? Jun 7, 2022 21:48

Warden: Jan 16, 2020

feedmegin posted:

...that is literally how militaries work, yes.

You're confusing "respect" with "saluting and obeying an rear end in a top hat because he outranks you". I saluted and obeyed our captain, but sure as hell did not respect him, whereas I greatly respected our Lt.

# ? Jun 7, 2022 22:12

DaysBefore: Jan 24, 2019

You're a mean one, Mr. Saruman

Edit:

Wait gently caress that's grinch not grouch gently caress

# ? Jun 7, 2022 22:13

Piell: Sep 3, 2006; Grey Worm's Ken doll-like groin throbbed with the anticipatory pleasure that only a slightly warm and moist piece of lemoncake could offer; Young Orc

AITA for telling my brother my fiancée was right and he should use proper manners while he was eating?

quote:

My brother took my mom and dad and me and my fiancée out to Milestones after I got engaged to her for a celebration. My brother ordered a steak. My fiancée was unimpressed with certain things he did that are against proper manners for eating, steak especially.

My brother put sauce on the steak instead of eating it as it was made, he ate all of it and didn't leave even one bite and the most off all he cut the entire steak into pieces before he ate it instead of cutting and eating one piece at a time.

I didn't know he was showing bad manners but she did. I even asked him to stop cutting the steak and just eat it a piece at a time and tried to address the other stuff but he just ignored me and it made for an awkward time the rest of the night. My parents are divorced and it was more awkward than having them in the same room. Neither me or her were rude when we pointed out he was not using proper manners for eating steak but he called me on it when I mentioned it after the dinner and claimed he didn't do anything wrong. AITA here for pointing out how awful his manners were at our engagement dinner? I'd have been embarrassed if I was in his shoes.

Is there seriously some manners bullshit that you can't eat all your steak?

# ? Jun 7, 2022 22:21

AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

Piell posted:

Is there seriously some manners bullshit that you can't eat all your steak?

Some etiquette guides will say that eating everything on your plate means you can't afford to eat regularly, like some sort of peasant.

# ? Jun 7, 2022 22:23

Alchenar: Apr 9, 2008

AreWeDrunkYet posted:

Some etiquette guides will say that eating everything on your plate means you can't afford to eat regularly, like some sort of peasant.

Just like using seasoning implies that your food isn't fresh, like some sort of peasant.

# ? Jun 7, 2022 22:27

Killingyouguy!: Sep 8, 2014

I've heard it that as a dinner guest you should leave a bite to indicate you were too full to finish and therefore the host didn't underfeed you (a crime)? But like.... It's a restaurant

E: a chain restaurant, apparently

# ? Jun 7, 2022 22:29

Splicer: Oct 16, 2006; from hell's heart I cast at thee
🧙🐀🧹🌙🪄🐸

DaysBefore posted:

You're a mean one, Mr. Saruman

Edit:

Wait gently caress that's grinch not grouch gently caress

The bird is big my lord. His imagination runs deep.

# ? Jun 7, 2022 22:30

pentyne: Nov 7, 2012

Leaving 3 fries behind to signal my approval of the meal.

# ? Jun 7, 2022 22:31

artsy fartsy: May 10, 2014; You'll be ahead instead of behind. Hello!

I don't understand these people that are so happy to point out when others are being "rude", when calling someone out like that is considered extremely rude by fancy etiquette standards.

# ? Jun 7, 2022 22:32

Judge Schnoopy: Nov 2, 2005; dont even TRY it, pal

Oh my god you're going to cause a steak chat derail, right after we fought through an unholy and boring bike chat derail.

You monster.

# ? Jun 7, 2022 22:34

pentyne: Nov 7, 2012

Judge Schnoopy posted:

Oh my god you're going to cause a steak chat derail, right after we fought through an unholy and boring bike chat derail.

You monster.

I usually tip the waiter the bone, those kinds of people usually have dogs or live near dogs who appreciate it.

# ? Jun 7, 2022 22:36

Tarkus: Aug 27, 2000

You should always leave a little bit of steak on the plate, preferably chewed gristle, and never put sauce on it. The chef prepared it to be eaten as it was received. You wouldn't paint over the Mona Lisa would you?

# ? Jun 7, 2022 22:37

Dr. Video Games 0135: May 20, 2003; That's gonna be a zoinks from me, Scoob

Skutter posted:

A combination of IOSM thread and this one. "You shouldn't be mean to Disney adults because they treat Disney like a religion so that makes their behavior okay"

https://twitter.com/jeichlerlevine/status/1533909820453142530

All-timer reply https://twitter.com/freecialis2/status/1533964634235064320?s=20&t=wXiw1nFjwUNxtHiEZ5770Q

# ? Jun 7, 2022 22:38

run on sentience: Mar 22, 2022

They are especially assholes for criticizing steak bro since it sounds like he was the one paying for everyone.

# ? Jun 7, 2022 22:38

quantumwell: Jun 22, 2013

Judge Schnoopy posted:

Oh my god you're going to cause a steak chat derail, right after we fought through an unholy and boring bike chat derail.

You monster.

Tomahawk Steak v.s. Waygu, Fight!

# ? Jun 7, 2022 22:39

artsy fartsy: May 10, 2014; You'll be ahead instead of behind. Hello!

Lol not the greatest AITA but y'all just TRY to guess the spoilered name

AITA for not letting my wife choose a baby name for one of the twins after I chose the other one?

quote:

My wife and I (both in our thirties) are expecting our first babies (twin boys) in 3 weeks. We have been talking baby names for the longest time now, making lists and discussing them.

She has been really anxious about the birth, has been on bed rest for 2 motnhs already, and she's really scared something might go wrong. I get that and I try to be as supportive as possible. The problem arose last week when we were trying to make a final decision on baby names.

We said that we would each choose one baby name. I chose the name Daniel. We both love the name, my late brother was named Danny so it has special meaning for me.

My wife chose the name Frodo. I said that's an awful thing to name a child and opens him up to all kinds of bullying. She said it's only fair that she gets to choose a name if I got to choose one and I said that I agree, but it should really be a normal name and not something that sounds so ridicolous.

She said I'm an AH for trying to monopolize the names. I said she can choose one name like we talked about, but not f-in Frodo. She said I'm being petty and closed minded. I then said that we can use Frodo as a middle name if she absolutely insists, that way it's kind of funny, but not really a name he is stuck with. And if he grows up wanting to be a Frodo, so be it. She refused. I said we can't name our kid Frodo because that is ridicolous, then she said that then she isn't accepting Daniel either. I ssid she is being unreasonable and the names aren't comparable at all.

She is now refusing to speak to me. My mother said I should just let her have her way with this, MIL says I'm a massive AH. My dad said Frodo is an absurd name and so did my SIL. BIL said it's a good name (but his daughter is named Wheat, so yeah).

Aita?

# ? Jun 7, 2022 22:46

limp_cheese: Sep 10, 2007; Nothing to see here. Move along.

Phuzzy posted:

I (25F) screamed at my Chinese MIL, who is living with us indefinitely and is also undermining most of our parenting choices. I am afraid our relationship can't recover from this. How do we move forward?

and then my husband started throwing plates on the floor to get us to STFU. This effectively stopped us screaming at each other, but left us all standing in a room full of glass

In a post full of insanity this is the part that jumped out at me. I'm not sure which is better, that their fighting was so over the top that's the only way he thought of disttacting them or that might be his coping mechanism for extreme blowouts.

Either way its a funny mental image of 2 women screaming at each other while he just opens cabinets and empties them onto the floor. Glass flying everywhere like its a loving Michael Bay film. Maybe the only thing that popped into his mind is the scene from the Godfather where Michael's sister finally confronts her husband about his affairs and just throws everything on the ground.

Its just so bizarre.

# ? Jun 7, 2022 22:54

kdrudy: Sep 19, 2009

Judge Schnoopy posted:

Oh my god you're going to cause a steak chat derail, right after we fought through an unholy and boring bike chat derail.

You monster.

All I know is you have to eat every last bit of the Ol' 96er if you want that free meal.

# ? Jun 7, 2022 22:56

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# ? May 28, 2024 14:59

Midnight Voyager: Jul 2, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

limp_cheese posted:

In a post full of insanity this is the part that jumped out at me. I'm not sure which is better, that their fighting was so over the top that's the only way he thought of disttacting them or that might be his coping mechanism for extreme blowouts.

Either way its a funny mental image of 2 women screaming at each other while he just opens cabinets and empties them onto the floor. Glass flying everywhere like its a loving Michael Bay film. Maybe the only thing that popped into his mind is the scene from the Godfather where Michael's sister finally confronts her husband about his affairs and just throws everything on the ground.

Its just so bizarre.

Yeah, I wonder if he was trying to stop them first and they just ignored him until he gave up and got crazy with it? Surely that wasn't the first thing he tried??

# ? Jun 7, 2022 23:01

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