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my homie dhall posted:mistranslation I think. those fuckers can cook *nothing* Or perhaps will cook anything, as in will cook macaroni with ketchup and hotdogs and have it as a breakfast soup.
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Jul 8, 2022 12:18
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macaroni soup is a sacred pastime
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Jul 8, 2022 12:31
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My ex once told me her cat disappeared because Cantonese families pile into the car on the weekend and drive around the country to steal people's pets and eat them.
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Jul 8, 2022 17:16
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Grand Fromage posted:My ex once told me her cat disappeared because Cantonese families pile into the car on the weekend and drive around the country to steal people's pets and eat them. I don't think they do that 
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Jul 8, 2022 17:25
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3D Megadoodoo posted:I don't think they do that She was pretty insistent this is a normal thing that all Chinese people know. My students agreed so it must be true. People never just make poo poo up.
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Jul 8, 2022 17:30
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Grand Fromage posted:My ex once told me her cat disappeared because Cantonese families pile into the car on the weekend and drive around the country to steal people's pets and eat them. im reading this in smash mouth's voice
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Jul 8, 2022 17:39
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Good fun movie, we watched it again the other night. Karen Mok is super cool.
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Jul 8, 2022 17:42
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It was extra funny since this was a few days after she admitted to me she was from Henan, and explained why she'd hidden it and all the horrible stereotypes and how people had treated her like poo poo for being Henanren all her life. Then, Cantonese pet eaters. I was just like uh, that is definitely nonsense and how is it different than the poo poo people say about Henan and her response was it's different because it's true.
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Jul 8, 2022 17:46
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always remember that dudes grandpa in maus who survived the holocaust, escaped the nazis, and now is racist against black peeps
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Jul 8, 2022 17:49
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its all true but it was the rumor started when the griswolds visited china and ran out of money
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Jul 8, 2022 18:00
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Just popping in here to say hello. =]
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Jul 8, 2022 18:00
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bob dobbs is dead posted:always remember that dudes grandpa in maus who survived the holocaust, escaped the nazis, and now is racist against black peeps I remember that dad being a kapo, and a quote from either the books or elsewhere how "only the best or the worst survived the camps". I'm not sure about either but it's stuck with me all these years.
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Jul 8, 2022 18:05
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big time bisexual posted:Finally, the sequel to La Chinoise -Suffering from a bout of cafeteria laduzi, the Laowai scrambles to the nearest bathroom only to find that the only choice are squatters with 1-meter-high walls and no doors. A 3-minute scene follows that's just a close-up of him frowning and staring intently as he decides what to do next. He ends up taking his pants and shoes entirely off as he attempts to use the toilet. -People on bikes and e-bikes screaming "laowai," "waiguoren," and "haluuuuooooooo" at him as they zip past. -Half the movie takes place in a foreigner bar, him sitting at a table with other out of shape white people, all commiserating about how China is nothing like back home. -His coworkers and friends telling him his chopsticks skills are very good after seeing him clumsily pick up a piece of fried lettuce. -His coworkers and friends telling him his Chinese language skills are very good after they hear him say "Nee how." -The Laowai buying clothes in his normal sizes, but finding out they are 4 times smaller than he thought, and the clothes can't be returned. -The Laowai's existential dilemma of figuring out what to during the daily mandatory nap time. -Alongside his Chinese peers, the Laowai absolutely jaw-dropped gawking at the first black person he's seen in a year. -Being trained to obediently never question "5000 years" rants or Traditional Chinese Medicine advice so that he can he keep his sanity among a sea of superstition and revisionism. -The Laowai complaining that he didn't pay money just to cook his own food after going to hotpot for the first time. -The slope-shouldered, pot-bellied, ricket-legged, bald/balding Laowai thinking he is a pure Sex God Five-Star Man after dating two Chinese women that didn't really like him that much. -And much, much, more!
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Jul 8, 2022 19:09
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https://twitter.com/WithChineseCha1/status/1545463175843233792 Chinese Censorship evaders continue to be clever.
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Jul 8, 2022 19:19
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Goons is there a Mandarin language stream of CGTN anywhere on YouTube? I can only find the English language stuff. The in-laws are over and I’d rather go with YouTube collecting my data than god knows what with the party.
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Jul 8, 2022 22:34
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ThisIsJohnWayne posted:I remember that dad being a kapo, and a quote from either the books or elsewhere how "only the best or the worst survived the camps". I'm not sure about either but it's stuck with me all these years. I just read it last year and I don't think he was a kapo.
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Jul 8, 2022 23:34
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Warbird posted:Goons is there a Mandarin language stream of CGTN anywhere on YouTube? I can only find the English language stuff. The in-laws are over and I’d rather go with YouTube collecting my data than god knows what with the party. Comedy option: Stream NDTV. That said at least give them TVB as it’s not at least Chinese State Media, though weak willed, but they should have a Mandarin stream.
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Jul 8, 2022 23:39
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Marshal Prolapse posted:Comedy option: Stream NDTV. Never heard of it, link me up fam
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Jul 8, 2022 23:48
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Grand Fromage posted:It was extra funny since this was a few days after she admitted to me she was from Henan, and explained why she'd hidden it and all the horrible stereotypes and how people had treated her like poo poo for being Henanren all her life. Then, Cantonese pet eaters. lmao what a beautiful anecdote. Thank you. PITY BONER posted:Highlights include: From the promotional shots on IMDB it looks like this lovely film actually has such a chopsticks scene  Can't wait for the laowaiploitation era in China's burgeoning film industry. 
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Jul 9, 2022 00:57
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big time bisexual posted:lmao what a beautiful anecdote. Thank you. So chinese remake of gun ho?
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Jul 9, 2022 02:00
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Grand Fromage posted:My ex once told me her cat disappeared because Cantonese families pile into the car on the weekend and drive around the country to steal people's pets and eat them. Joke's on her - the sort of ayi that would do that lives locally and doesn't own a car.
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Jul 9, 2022 02:25
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Warbird posted:Never heard of it, link me up fam https://www.tvbanywhere.com/ This won’t work in the US, but VPN should take care of it. Their YouTube channels have a lot of stuff though, which honestly should work just as well. Here is a link to their Mandarin News Service. Obviously still has the deficits of recent laws in Hong Kong, but at least it’s not an official party organ or as bad as the Mainland. https://youtu.be/d_Em4a79KQk Check the channels tab for all their related channels, one is even 90s TV shows, Which is cool as hell as you’d have a lot of Hong Kong stars starting out there or even appearing in them and it was before the death of the Hong Kong film industry due to the PRC’s dumb rear end policies and mainland coproductions. Marshal Prolapse fucked around with this message at 02:39 on Jul 9, 2022 |
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Jul 9, 2022 02:37
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big time bisexual posted:
20 years ago there was a sketch show on HK tv with a recurring gwailo character. He was just one of the Chinese actors in a Boris Johnson wig and huge fake nose who did nothing but gently caress up and chase the female characters.
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Jul 9, 2022 02:55
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yaffle posted:20 years ago there was a sketch show on HK tv with a recurring gwailo character. He was just one of the Chinese actors in a Boris Johnson wig and huge fake nose who did nothing but gently caress up and chase the female characters. A documentary, you say?
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Jul 9, 2022 02:58
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It’s such a shame how the Hong Kong film industry died off, forever stuck needing Mainland Co-Productions and now new censorship rules. Man 70s-early 00s was the absolute best stuff in the world for action and tons of other stuff. It was its own wild and unique thing, and the city was like its own character with neon signs and the Cantonese dialect.
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Jul 9, 2022 02:59
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Marshal Prolapse posted:It’s such a shame how the Hong Kong film industry died off, forever stuck needing Mainland Co-Productions and now new censorship rules. Man 70s-early 00s was the absolute best stuff in the world for action and tons of other stuff. It was its own wild and unique thing, and the city was like its own character with neon signs and the Cantonese dialect. Lately my buddy has sent me weird clips from old chinese movies (he thinks my reading kanji at 3 rd grade level means I can read chinese) and I m still trying to figure out if they were hong kong or taiwan movies. The clips are porn. The wizard dude fucks one of those hopping chinese zombies.
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Jul 9, 2022 04:44
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Ups_rail posted:Lately my buddy has sent me weird clips from old chinese movies (he thinks my reading kanji at 3 rd grade level means I can read chinese) and I m still trying to figure out if they were hong kong or taiwan movies. Wonder if it was a 90s CAT III movie from Hong Kong, assuming it’s not hard-core. Oh that should actually be easy to figure out which country it’s from, also long as it’s not a dub (meaning from the original language and not the fact that both countries were dubbing all their audio after). If it’s Taiwan it’s in Mandarin, if it’s from Hong Kong and from the 80s on its going to be Cantonese.
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Jul 9, 2022 05:24
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Marshal Prolapse posted:lol that’s loving hilarious. Oh its loving hard core   I wont post hard core porn, this is gbs after all
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Jul 9, 2022 05:39
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Marshal Prolapse posted:lol that’s loving hilarious. For many HK movies up until the 90s, they were dubbing over all dialogue in post anyway, so you would have simultaneous Mandarin and Cantonese versions.
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Jul 9, 2022 05:43
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Marshal Prolapse posted:It’s such a shame how the Hong Kong film industry died off, forever stuck needing Mainland Co-Productions and now new censorship rules. Man 70s-early 00s was the absolute best stuff in the world for action and tons of other stuff. It was its own wild and unique thing, and the city was like its own character with neon signs and the Cantonese dialect. I used to have a collection of Godfrey Ho films and they were just a treasure trove of amazing awfulness. I remember one ending with a ninja watching some frogs explode and just saying something like "well gently caress this poo poo"...roll credits. I'm not entirely sure I didn't just dream that, but his stuff is legit off the wall. e: oh poo poo, SA even reviewed a few of his films for the front page! Gromit fucked around with this message at 06:06 on Jul 9, 2022 |
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Jul 9, 2022 06:03
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Ups_rail posted:Oh its loving hard core If you a want good and weird Hong Kong sex-related movie, A Chinese Torture Chamber Story has some legit LOLs. I can't remember if it's the one where a guy gets his dick replaced with a horse dick and he goes around banging everyone. If someone knows which one that is, let us know. Edit: the horse dick movie is Sex and Zen. It's definitely worth a watch. big time bisexual posted:lmao what a beautiful anecdote. Thank you. PITY BONER fucked around with this message at 08:46 on Jul 9, 2022 |
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Jul 9, 2022 08:40
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i keep forgetting the name of this movie, it starts with this guy who thinks he's getting his dick sucked but she's a vampire. when he gets back to hong kong his fiancee finds two red dots on his tidy whiteys and he starts craving blood, also the vampire girl shows up from romania or something. eventually they start getting along and have a romantic dinner of blood bags and used tampons. it ends with dracula showing up and the vampire girl sacrificing herself for the guy, and defeating dracula with a comically large syringe full of acid.
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Jul 9, 2022 09:30
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Booty Pageant posted:used tampons. This isn't really related but nearly 20 years ago I had this crazy rich friend who had this ridiculous VHS/DVD collection, her family would get pretty much every movie for her ever, and she was weird so she got a bunch of weird stuff. The collection was beyond even a family video in size. One movie she had we all watched was specifically about this, tampon vampires. It had the production quality of "rednecks with a camcorder" and was just awful in every way. I have googled and googled, but tampon vampires brings up a whole lot of nasty stuff that isn't this movie. And every day the memory of the movie gets fuzzier and fuzzier  It was not Chinese though
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Jul 9, 2022 10:04
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this friend of yours sounds like a great boon to the lost media people also i found my movie, it's called doctor vampire, and someone uploaded it to facebook https://m.facebook.com/100070780654756/videos/%E5%83%B5%E5%B0%B8%E5%8C%BB%E7%94%9F-%E7%94%B5%E5%BD%B1-movie/918747928829200/
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Jul 9, 2022 10:24
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Jul 9, 2022 13:09
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Malpractice suits are the same the world over.
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Jul 9, 2022 13:13
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Is that the one where the guy with the donkey dick is given some sort of toxic Spanish Fly and cums a geyser of blood? Hong Kong cinema was so crazy/funny/awesome.
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Jul 10, 2022 05:05
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How did HK gently caress up so bad that it went from being the epicenter of Asian film, music, entertainment, etc., to basically nothing in about 10-20 years? I can imagine scenarios where HK is today what South Korea is, or at least somewhat still in the conversation.
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Jul 10, 2022 05:59
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Smeef posted:How did HK gently caress up so bad that it went from being the epicenter of Asian film, music, entertainment, etc., to basically nothing in about 10-20 years? I can imagine scenarios where HK is today what South Korea is, or at least somewhat still in the conversation.
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Jul 10, 2022 06:01
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Vegetable posted:The answer is China
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