quote:

My (F22) boyfriend of 3 years (M22) bailed on the trip I had planned for us 3 days before we were supposed to go

(sorry for the long post I didnt want anything out of context) A month ago I had impulsively thought of taking a trip to the east coast with my boyfriend of 3 years. This would have been our first trip together. I honestly didnt think it was going to happen, so I was super excited when my boyfriend said let's do it and took the time off work for it. After he gave me the okay I put everything into place; flight, hotels, car rental. I had told him prior to any planning it will cost us each about $700-$800 dollars each. I did a of the planning myself, and its been my dream to see the east coast, so I am super excited for this thing. He never really seemed enthusiastic, but I just thought that it was a man thing and he didnt want to acted excited or anything? I never thought it was because he didnt want to go, because ya know he told me he did

A week ago when I was at work my bf sent me a text saying he did want to go, which broke me. I ended up freaking out because he could have waiting till I got home to dump this on me. I guess this caused him to change his mind again and told me he wants to go, but is just nervous. I talked to him about it when I got home and he stuck with this "I want to go, I'm just scared" (This would be his first time out of province and on a plane).

Last night we went on a walk. and he was telling me about how he has finally found his passion and is ready to start chasing his dreams, etc.. He wants to go back to college next fall, which made me really happy and proud. After about an hour and a half of him telling me all of this, he stops and looks at me, then says "This is why I cant go on the trip with you" . I immediately starts balling and walking the other way, I broke again. It is now 3 days before the trip and he tells me he cant stop wasting his life and he has to start working on this now. I asked him what he needs to do so bad in the 5 days we would be gone, and he never gave me a straight answer. Except for 'I cant waste anymore time'. I am so happy for him that he found himself, but I honestly dont understand why he cant come with me because of this. He said he wanted to go for me but he cant. He doesnt understand why I don't understand him. It feels like he threw me on the back burner and really dont get how much this trip means to me, and why he had to lie about it for a week just to appease me. I've been counting down the days and voicing now exciting I am to experience it with him and he still kept his mouth shut.

Oh right he is also saying that he wont pay for his part anymore, even if I still go. Everything is paid for and half of it is non refundable.

I dont know what to think of any of this and any thoughts would be appreciated.

Mx. posted:

I just found 4 boxes of Lean Cusine microwavable dinners in my girlfriend’s outside trash bin. Two were from our dinner tonight, and two from Thursday dinner. Chicken parmesan and Chang’s Szechuan chicken. Two of my favorite meals that she “ cooks” for our date nights.

AreWeDrunkYet posted:

-He already mentions it, but what kind of garbage palate can't distinguish between frozen and home made food?

quote:

I f22 am currently staying with my eldest sister (Natalie) f32 and her boyfriend (Micah) m36 as I finish my semester in college.

Natalie has a safe of all her valuable jewelry and other antiques that she keeps in a safe. Since some of the stuff she has is from our granmother, she let me have the password to be able yo access the safe anytime I wanted but under the condition that I tell her first and not give the password to anybody else.

She went away on a trip with her girlfriends 2 days ago and won't be back til wednesday. This morning as I was cleaning up, Micah showed up and started asking me questions about the safe. I tried to give him one word answers and he sensed that I was bring "secretive" but really I was just being straightforward. He then asked me to give him the password to the safe. I was taken aback I said why and he said that he has always been curious about what's in there and wanted to get a "quick peek". I said I didn't have it but he told me to quit lying because he heard Natalie say that I could open the safe anytime I wanted. I told him that still, it's not my property and I can't share the password with him. He said it was really not that big deal but I politely told him no. He got upset and reminded me who he is to Natalie and how I was just a guest in their house. I said that being a guest is completely irrelevant in this case but he chuckled and said that I was being ridiculous. I suggested he wait for Natalie to come home but he got more upset and said that she's already refused to let him take a look. I shrugged and said that it was not my problem. We got jnto an argument and I tried calling Natalie but her phone's been off for hours. He yelled at me saying I was disrespecting at his own home and rushed out.

I'm home alone now and feel completey shaken because of how he yelled at me. I'm an awkward person with little to non confrontational abilities and now I think I might've escalated the situation and made him feel upset and as if I don't trust his word when he said it'd just be a minute.

AITA for standing my ground on this? Should I just let him have it if he gets back and asks for it?

Involuntary Sparkle posted:

The apple tree person is going around posting in other places too:

legaladvice: My dad cut down a apple tree on my rental property. I need advice on the next steps.

And my favorite

marijuanaenthusiasts: Help my dad cut down my husbands aunts apple tree

Foo Diddley posted:

lol i like the phrasing on the second one, there. did a lot of stoners think they were gonna help cut down a tree?

killer crane posted:

It's a subreddit for tree enthusiasts, because r/trees is used by stoners to talk about stoner poo poo.

Foo Diddley posted:

AITA for refusing to let my sister's boyfriend have the password to her safe while she's away?

mikey here might not be the dumbest thief in the world, but he's def in the high scores list. OP did him a favor by ending his dumb loving plan right there

quote:

I suggested he wait for Natalie to come home but he got more upset and said that she's already refused to let him take a look.

quote:

My (27F) husband (29M), Mark, and I our expecting our first child, whom we have been planning on naming ‘Zachary’ for the short duration of our IUI journey. The name is rather meaningful to Mark, as it was/is his deceased grandfather’s middle name. I, on the other hand, just happen to rather enjoy the sound of it. I also happen to favor how common it is, as I can acknowledge because my brother-in-law’s son (12M), Caleb’s, classes are filled to the brim with children named ‘Greenlee’ and ‘Atticus’, according to his wife.

Anyhow, Mark and I were recently discussing our future son’s name, as we felt the need to “double-check” everything before our son arrived, as I am seven months along. I decided to write the name on Mark’s dry-erase board, just to clarify our decision. Understandably, I wrote it down as ‘Zachary’, as that is/was the main spelling I am/was aware of. Within seconds, Mark said “no; no”, and claimed that I had spelled it incorrectly. I decided to write it down as ‘Zackary’, then, assuming that he was referring to that spelling. In common fashion to ‘Zachary’, though, he vetoed it.

In a last attempt, I scribbled ‘Zakary’ onto the aforementioned board, though, shockingly, Mark “informed” me that I had spelt the name wrong. Finally, I asked him what spelling he was considering. He stood up, took the marker, and wrote ‘Xaiquiri’ on the board.

Carefully, I asked him if he was joking, but he said “no”. I told him that—while his feeling surrounding our son’s name were/are certainly valid—that I did not support his idea of naming our son ‘Xaiquiri’. Unfortunately, he refused to listen, despite my commentary, and insisted on ‘Xaiquiri’. Eventually, he even said that it was ‘Xaiquiri or nothing’. I told him that because he seemed against ‘Zachary’, and I was against his suggestion, we may have to go back to the drawing board and pick a new name, as naming a child is a “Two-Yes Business”.

Mark told me that I was being very unfair and that ‘Xaiquiri’ was a perfectly “normal” name. I told him that I was sorry, but that we would have to find a new name, since neither of us could agree.

Needless to say, Mark was incredibly frustrated, and he decided to go to his room. I feel/felt that I may have been the rear end in a top hat in said situation because I may have been too harsh on him, as he claimed that the name was rather meaningful to him. It would have certainty been possible to refuse the name in a kinder way, without having Mark storm off/having feeling hurt.

So, AITA? TIA!

quote:

My stepsister was supposed to get married in December and as part of the pre-wedding celebration her in-laws invited us on a trip with their extended family. My dad is a good friend of her fiancé’s uncle and I’m close to his daughter so I was excited about the trip.

Before we left my stepmother and stepsister kept stressing about how we all needed to be on our best behaviour because they didn’t want to risk the wedding being called off.

I tried my best but they were honestly stressing me out because they were so worried about every little thing offending her fiancé’s grandparents. My friend, her brother and cousins invited me to hangout one night and I agreed even though I knew my stepsister wouldn’t want me to.

I ended up getting a little drunk and I was caught in a compromising position with my friend’s brother by his uncle. My stepsister was so angry when she found out and we had a massive fight because she thinks I did it on purpose to humiliate her which isn’t true. She keeps saying I’ve ruined everything and how she doesn’t even know if she wants me at her wedding anymore which I feel is overdramatic.

AITA?

Captain Hygiene posted:

Just stomping off to my own room because I'm mad at my wife

MisterOblivious posted:

quote:

Pretext: My marriage to my wife is very rocky and fast approaching an end. I have a very close female friend at work(I am the only male at work). We obviously interact at work and we also talk outside of work on snapchat/whatsapp etc but we don't hang out outside of work with exception of staff events. Both my wife and my friends husband don't approve of this friendship.

The situation: One day my wife started getting messages on facebook from a random account telling her something was going on between me and my friend. This occurred several times and progressed to include a 2nd co-worker. Pictures were taken and posted outside of places I was at for staff catchups (work related 75% of staff present, not just me and 1 person). Wife works away 2 days a week - messages were sent insinuating I had girls from work over whilst she was away.She was very very upset everytime she recieved a message - crying to the point of unable to speak.

Suspicions were raised that these messages were sent from someone at work who suspected something was going on between me and my friend. Went to the boss who held a meeting about cyber bullying and if the culprit was found they would be sacked. Boss even came to my house to personally apologise to my wife.

I had no idea who was sending these messages. I suspected a couple people from work or my wife. I asked my wife in person who denied it. She became very upset.

This occurred a month ago - since I suggested blocking the account, she hasn't recieved another on.

Today I discovered she was the one sending messages to herself. She also sent messages from this account to my friends husband(who told her he recieved messages but not the content - they were pictures of my phone screen with snapchat conversation)

Question is - How do I approach this? I am so embarassed. The poo poo it caused at work, everyone suspecting everyone, people being accused, my boss sticking up for wife by apologising and holding a meeting etc etc How I navigate this? How do I show my face knowing I stuck up for my wife and lost friends over it?

I haven't confronted my wife. How do I?

quote:

My wife tried to support me but she just didnt understand. My issues were very much work related (my industry has the highest rate of suicide of any). My friend understood and could relate to what I was going through alot more than my wife unfortunately.

A decision I made lead to the death of a patient. A very preventable death. Every loving day and every patient I dealt with since reminded of the time I hosed up and it cost a life. I second guesses wvery decision after that. The look in their eyes as they passed still makes me cry thinking about it.

This went on for 6 months. You have no idea what I went through. Judge me about my friendship, my marriage, but do not judge me over having a fuxking breakdown over killing a patient.

Captain Hygiene posted:

I feel like any one of us could write a better relationship advice column than any one that exists today, if only newspaper editors weren't so dead set against the phrase "acid vat"

Fatty posted:

Trust me, the spoiler is worth it.

Dudes a veterinarian

Motronic posted:

How do you think they would feel about "manchild"?

Fatty posted:

Trust me, the spoiler is worth it.

Wife (37f) created a fake Facebook account to message herself accusing me (35m) of cheating

Why did he have an emotional affair with his coworker?

Dudes a veterinarian

Fatty posted:

Trust me, the spoiler is worth it.

Wife (37f) created a fake Facebook account to message herself accusing me (35m) of cheating

Why did he have an emotional affair with his coworker?

Dudes a veterinarian

Foo Diddley posted:

he must be pretty excited that there's going to be another toddler in the family

Fatty posted:

I don't doubt that veterinarians have it hard. Its just comical to me that I had to go back 3 pages of his comments to find out he was one.

Shwoo posted:

School banking...

...Queer coding is a thing in media where a character is intended to be queer, but it's implied instead of said outright for whatever reason. It's impossible for a real person to be queer coded. Also, why would it matter if she was single or not? Being in a relationship doesn't make a bi person not bi.

killer crane posted:

Her dad's a huge prick, and she seems to dumb to function. I wonder how much Dad will care once her husband leaves.

I also want to know how old everyone is.

quote:

I(27M) met my fiancee(26F) five years ago, engaged for 6 months. I love her with all my life. She is kind, attentive to me, we have similar hobbies, awesome bedroom life. It is perfect. She really gets along with my family, especially with my trans brother(23FtM). They became like best friends. All things alligned, so I proposed and she said yes, which was, up to this point, the best day of my life. She took charge of wedding planning, but I still wanted to give my input and do the required work. Her parents wanted to pay for everything and we accepted.

We were at my future FILs birthday party when the wedding came up. Fiancee started talking how wedding venue is already booked, and she already selected bridesmaids and MOH, and my best men(my best friend) and groomsmen, and she already has a guest list(70 her, 30 mine). This was such a shock to me, I didnt know any of this. I was really upset at this point and told her that I will select all the people on my party, and all the people from my side, that I want at our wedding. My future MIL intervened, and tells me that they are paying for the wedding and so her daughter calls all the shots. I told her that my brother will be my best men, and then fiancee said that my brother is in the middle of transition and currently doesnt look pretty enough for our pictures. He will be just a guest. I lost it. I stood up and told her that my brother was prettier than her when he was a woman, and is prettier now as a man. I stormed off from the party.

I havent told anyone about the incident, and now she and her family are telling everyone that I called her ugly. She messaged that she wont talk to me until I gave her public apology. She even got my family and my brother on their side. But I wont tell anyone. My brother went through so much of rejection and dissapointments. He would be crushed if he knew. I would rather take all the poo poo, than to see him hurt again. I love him too much.

AITA?

Fatty posted:

Yes, animal deaths can be devastating. If you think a medical professional mistakenly killing a pet is anywhere near the same scale as accidentally killing a person, lets just say the legislature sees it very differently.

I think its perfectly reasonable to assume he was talking about a human, and be surprised when the lede is so heavily buried.

Cowslips Warren posted:

AITA for telling my fiancee that my brother was prettier than her as a woman, and is prettier now as a man

Foo Diddley posted:

my advice column's called "toss your manchild into the acid vat" and the deal is that i just never write any responses

cake bunny posted:

IDK. I'm still not seeing what's funny over the guy being in a very bad mental state and needing to talk to someone who understands the situation well. Is it funny because the dead patient is an animal? Am I supposed to laugh because it's inherently ridiculous to be that upset at mistakenly causing animal death, or because he called his patient a patient? Something else? Please explain.

Kitfox88 posted:

It's only amusing in the sense that you'd naturally assume he was a people doctor given how he was talking about it, but yeah, I feel super bad and in that situation I'd be traumatized as hell too. Still, he's emotionally cheating but given the way his wife is acting I can't really imagine she's been very supportive through all this either.

Captain Hygiene posted:

Comments said they have a magically changing age and occupation from their past posts, so you don't need to feel too bad

Cowslips Warren posted:

AITA for essentially telling my husband that the apparent “meaningful” name he was/is insisting on for our unborn son is utterly unfit?

I mean dad even said that name or nothing, so name the kid Nothing?

quote:

I was invited to a 3-day vacation with 3 of my girl friends and their husbands plus 2 of the husbands' single guy friends. On the last day we were exploring the city and came upon a beach. It looked nice and fun so we hung out there for a while before stumbling on an adults-only nude section of it. There weren't many people overall but I did see a few other women in the distance without tops on, so I felt it was clear to take mine off as well. It was great! Nobody else joined me though. We all continued to talk and joke in a circle for a while and I thought we were all having a really fun time. Then one of my friends said she felt sick so we left abruptly early, and our conversation on the way back was basically uncomfortably silent with the exception of low talking (that i wasn't part of) and some of the guys goofing around.

Later that night at the main room I find myself avoided by almost everyone until I'm confronted like it's an intervention by the three girls about how it was inappropriate for me to 'expose' myself in front of their husbands. I was shocked and told them I didn't mean anything by it. They said isn't it obvious that you don't just go naked in front of your friends' husbands and were like "notice how you were the ONLY ONE and you didn't wonder why??" This exploded into a further argument with me calling them insecure about their relationships until it culminated eventually into them all saying they don't trust me to be part of their friend group anymore.

All I thought I was doing was enjoying myself at a beach, not 'exposing' myself to their husbands. AITA???