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ChickenOfTomorrow
Nov 11, 2012

god damn it, you've got to be kind

Leon Trotsky 2012 posted:

the Debbie debacle several years ago.

repost it

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n8r
Jul 3, 2003

I helped Lowtax become a cyborg and all I got was this lousy avatar

Motronic posted:

Yes, one person who was immediately berated for it said some things like that. You're going to paint the entire thread that way now?

Imagine white knighting landlords.

Leon Trotsky 2012
Aug 27, 2009

YOU CAN TRUST ME!*


*Israeli Government-affiliated poster

Leon Trotsky 2012 posted:

One of our managers (who is one of the worst BWM offenders in a large pool of BWM, but is able to survive the consequences because she has a large income) is retiring next month. It has set off a massive BWM chain-reaction that is costing everyone money.

Part I:

Debbie is retiring early (age 55) after 24 years of service. Pensions fully vest after 25 years of service. You also get full health benefits after 25 years.

That means she is taking a roughly 28% reduction in her pension compared to getting a full pension.

She could cut that early retirement penalty down to 6% if she retired next year (fully vested, but take an age penalty for early retirement).

She doesn't have to retire right now, but she is doing it because she turned 55 last month and that is the youngest you can be to apply for early retirement and collect your pension.

She currently lives paycheck-to-paycheck on a salary of $92k a year, never opened a 457(b) with us during her tenure, and does not have an IRA. That means that her pension is her only income in retirement.

She bought a house 4 years ago. I don't know how much her house cost, but she frequently says that she paid "over half a mil" for it and complains about all the repairs.

The average home price in our area is about $228k.

There is no way that she is going to survive going from paycheck-to-paycheck on $92k a year - with all medical expenses paid for - to roughly $36k a year and responsible for all medical costs.

Everyone is very mad at her because the benefits office sat her down and tried to tell her about the massive amount of money she was leaving on the table by not staying the extra year (22% higher pension payments and healthcare benefits - she has diabetes and sees a doctor twice a month for foot pain treatment) and she didn't want to hear about it. She also got approved for two weeks of vacation and then put in her two-week notice on the second day of her vacation.

Part II:

She has the right to quit whenever she wants and HR/the agency just has to deal with getting a major position filled in two weeks without the previous employee there to train the new hire. Life goes on.

A retirement party is planned for her on the Thursday she comes back from vacation. Because we are a government agency, no public or office funds or materials of any kind can be used for this party.

Several of the major agency heads kick in a few hundred dollars to start the pot and Debbie is consulted about what she wants to do for her party.

Debbie seems to think that this is an episode of My Super Sweet 16 that her coworkers are all paying for.

We plan for:

- Invites for 78 people from outside of the office (39 of Debbie's friends/family and a +1 for each)
- $525 in flowers for the tables and an arrangement to wreath a blown up picture of her.
- A $400 gift from everyone (a gift card to a nice restaurant and gift card to a spa)

The venue she picked has different levels of charges depending on how many people will be there. They schedule a certain amount of staff and cook a certain amount of food, etc.

We select the "100-150 package" based on the ~40 people who were committed to going and the 78 that Debbie was inviting. You actually get discounts for higher levels, so her massive guest list was somewhat of a benefit for the rest of us.

The package we chose had you pick 2 of 4 different meals:

- Vegetarian ($9 per plate)
- Chicken ($11 per plate)
- Fish ($15 per plate)
- Steak ($22 per plate)

We initially went with Vegetarian and Chicken and sent an email out. Debbie called into the office from her vacation to let us know that "Chicken is trashy" and that there were not going to be any vegetarian requests from her party members (the vast majority of people going.)

They changed it to Fish and Steak. They ended up with 32 plates of fish and 86 plates of steak.

To budget for this change, they got rid of the bartenders and changed to a cash bar.

Debbie also requested that we get upgraded plates and silverware because it would be "trashy" to have steaks on regular ceramic plates and "dollar store knives."

After they accounted for the initial pool of money from the department heads, they determined that it would cost $35 per person to attend. This shrank the number of committed people.

Then, 3 days before the party, Debbie lets us know that she is back from vacation and talked to her friends and family about coming. The 78 people that she said were all "Yes" was actually going to be 22.

The venue charges a $500 fee for having fewer than 75% of the attendees you promised (I'm guessing this is something for tipping the excess staff or to offset the potential loses from fewer people? It wasn't clear why this is the case and the office is in the process of trying to get them to waive it.)

They can't back out of the event now and people who had RSVP'd are trying to wiggle their way out of the commitment.

The party committee decided that if they can't get them to waive that $500 fee, that they would just split it up amongst the employees that attended (not ALL the guests).

Now, there is a chain-reaction of people who suddenly can't make it to the event and that potential $500 (plus $35 for food, cash bar, and $10 for contribution to her gift) is going to be distributed among fewer and fewer people, which is in-turn causing more and more people to try and get out of it.

The party is this Thursday night and they just sent out an email saying that anyone who RSVP'd at any point is considered attending for all costs.

Keep in mind: The people Debbie manages (AKA the party attendees) all make around $28k a year.

Leon Trotsky 2012 posted:


quote:

I don't get it, why would anyone else care about this? I mean I would understand husband or kids being mad, but not soon-to-be former colleagues.

They aren't mad about her pension or healthcare costs (I assume that most don't know). They are mad because there is chaos down there because lots of people are trying to get Debbie's old job and she gave her 2-week notice one day into her 10-day vacation, so it is a madhouse down there.

Most of the Deputy Managers or Section Heads down there make around 35-40k. A promotion to a 92k salary (they won't make 92k because that was the result of 24 years of experience and % raises for Debbie, but they will still probably double their salary) is massive and there is no manager down there during it. It is basically a crab in a bucket situation where nobody wants to see anyone promoted for fear that their friends will be promoted over them and they will be on the "out clique."

HR wants to hire someone outside, but there is also a rebellion against that when someone from within "deserves" it.

The HR office has had dozens of complaints in the last week all against the people who are applying for Debbie's old job. There is some kind of weird entry-level administrative power struggle. A lot of these people have been making 28-30k for 15+ years and this is a very rare opening.

It is pretty much an environment of controlled chaos.

Leon Trotsky 2012 posted:

The Debbie retirement party saga ended with a semi-boring and anti-climactic loan from coworkers that is never going to be repaid.

Not enough people showed up, but the venue ended up making fewer dishes and charging us less because we gave them two days notice. They still charged the $500 fee for having 50% fewer people show up than the package we bought accommodated. Two managers paid $100 out of pocket each and they took $300 from the "employee appreciation fund" to cover the rest.

They are going to try and set bigger fundraising goals or just downsize our non-denominational holiday party that happens the week before Christmas.

Residency Evil
Jul 28, 2003

4/5 godo... Schumi
Now that's the sort of content that makes this thread great.

LifeSunDeath
Jan 4, 2007

still gay rights and smoke weed every day
never aspire to be rich, it will get you scammed every single time. if you aspire to scam people sometimes you get rich but also you will still get scammed becauses you're so greedy.

Thesaurus
Oct 3, 2004





I could read these posts all day

Midjack
Dec 24, 2007




Instant classic.

AreWeDrunkYet
Jul 8, 2006


Any clue on how Debbie is doing five years later after that self-inflicted income cut?

Leon Trotsky 2012
Aug 27, 2009

YOU CAN TRUST ME!*


*Israeli Government-affiliated poster

AreWeDrunkYet posted:

Any clue on how Debbie is doing five years later after that self-inflicted income cut?

Nope. Haven't heard from her or seen her.

I could ask if anyone keeps in touch.

Animal
Apr 8, 2003

AreWeDrunkYet posted:

Any clue on how Debbie is doing five years later after that self-inflicted income cut?

“Hi! Welcome to Walmart!”

Super-NintendoUser
Jan 16, 2004

COWABUNGERDER COMPADRES
Soiled Meat

Leon Trotsky 2012 posted:


The HR office has had dozens of complaints in the last week all against the people who are applying for Debbie's old job. There is some kind of weird entry-level administrative power struggle. A lot of these people have been making 28-30k for 15+ years and this is a very rare opening.


:eyepop:

This is just wild you can make nearly 30k working full time at a Target or Starbucks entry level. How you do stay at a place for 15+ years (at I guess a medium sized company maybe > ~290 employees given the tone) and only be making 30k after years of raises.

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.


It's the government.

Motronic
Nov 6, 2009

Super-NintendoUser posted:

:eyepop:

This is just wild you can make nearly 30k working full time at a Target or Starbucks entry level. How you do stay at a place for 15+ years (at I guess a medium sized company maybe > ~290 employees given the tone) and only be making 30k after years of raises.

It's a government job. With a pension.

Salary numbers alone are not reflective of total compensation.

Raskolnikov2089
Nov 3, 2006

Schizzy to the matic
Not BWM but GWM story, took money out of savings and bought my first I-bond thanks to this thread. I feel like a real grownup.

Actual BWM story, I donated to the democrats, and my email inbox became so clogged with their spam that I missed an important email from my accountant.

Raskolnikov2089 fucked around with this message at 18:56 on Oct 16, 2022

Quorum
Sep 24, 2014

REMIND ME AGAIN HOW THE LITTLE HORSE-SHAPED ONES MOVE?

Super-NintendoUser posted:

:eyepop:

This is just wild you can make nearly 30k working full time at a Target or Starbucks entry level. How you do stay at a place for 15+ years (at I guess a medium sized company maybe > ~290 employees given the tone) and only be making 30k after years of raises.

It's the (federal?) government and sadly that's the result of decades of deliberate underfunding of basic agency functions. The flip side is that every one of those sub-Target-wage employees is often doing more than one person's job because there are entire positions that exist but can and will never be filled due to brutal budget-office triage.

But hey, you can actually earn a pension if you can hang in there long enough!

Motronic
Nov 6, 2009

Dear MarketWatch,

quote:

Hi, hope you can provide some help.

I’ll be 57 next month and am divorced with three kids living with me. One is 28, she’s working, another is 21 and a senior in college (with a full scholarship) and the youngest is 15 (a sophomore in high school with a full scholarship).

I plan to retire at the end of next year with $25,000 in credit card debt and 15 more years to pay my mortgage. The credit cards have 0% interest. I have a good medical benefit when I retire and it will cover my two sons under 26 years old. My monthly expenses are $2,000, including life insurance, utilities, and a car payment.

My mortgage is around $4,000 monthly impounded. The interest rate is 2% until January 2022, then 3% until January 2023 and the remaining loan is 4.5%. Is it worth it to refinance to a lower rate? I also plan to just pay the principal and pay interest in December and April. I have two credit cards: one that totals $20,000, where the 0% promo ends in April 2021, and another with $4,500 where the 0% interest promo ends this December.

I work for the state and have a pension and 401(k) and 457 investments that total $110,000. I also have one month’s worth of expenses in an emergency fund. I can only apply for a loan to the retirement accounts while employed.

I would like to ask if retiring will be a good idea. If so, is it appropriate to take a loan with my investment to pay off the credit card debt before retiring? Based on our benefit, I don’t have to repay the debt (to the 401(k)) after my retirement unless I win the lottery or something. There won’t be a penalty. My annual gross income is $96,000.

I’m a cohabitant with my ex on the house but get no contribution from him at all. I am working with my lawyer to see if I have the right to kick him out of the house.

Please help.

Thank you.

CDT

Oh gently caress it, pretend I bolded the entire thing.

Residency Evil
Jul 28, 2003

4/5 godo... Schumi
Is that Debbie?

Leon Trotsky 2012
Aug 27, 2009

YOU CAN TRUST ME!*


*Israeli Government-affiliated poster

Residency Evil posted:

Is that Debbie?

No, she retired too early to get the medical benefit and she would be ~60 now.

She also didn't have a 401k, because you can only get a 453(b), but she did not have one of those either.

Leon Trotsky 2012
Aug 27, 2009

YOU CAN TRUST ME!*


*Israeli Government-affiliated poster

Super-NintendoUser posted:

:eyepop:

This is just wild you can make nearly 30k working full time at a Target or Starbucks entry level. How you do stay at a place for 15+ years (at I guess a medium sized company maybe > ~290 employees given the tone) and only be making 30k after years of raises.

They just announced that (most) federal employees will have a minimum wage of $15/hour or equivalent salary starting this year. That is only ~$31k annually and was a more than doubling of the previous minimum.

That said, being a janitor making $21k for the government is still usually better than being a janitor basically everywhere else when you factor in total compensation.

Involuntary Sparkle
Aug 12, 2004

Chemo-kitties can have “accidents” too!

Motronic posted:

Dear MarketWatch,

Oh gently caress it, pretend I bolded the entire thing.

Why bold the mortgage amount? That's approximately how much mine is and it's pretty standard in Seattle. I'm just happy with my < 3% interest rate.

Edit: bolded because they plan on retiring next month?

an iksar marauder
May 6, 2022

An iksar marauder glowers at you dubiously -- looks like quite a gamble.

Motronic posted:

Dear MarketWatch,

Oh gently caress it, pretend I bolded the entire thing.

this person is hosed

drk
Jan 16, 2005

Motronic posted:

Dear Penthouse Forum,

Oh gently caress it, pretend I bolded the entire thing.

If I read that right her semi-liquid net worth is less than $100k, and she thinks she can pay $48k/year in mortgage for 15 years plus other life expenses for the rest of her life with that money?

Motronic
Nov 6, 2009

Involuntary Sparkle posted:

Why bold the mortgage amount? That's approximately how much mine is and it's pretty standard in Seattle. I'm just happy with my < 3% interest rate.

Edit: bolded because they plan on retiring next month?

Because someone who is planning on retiring with 5 figures of credit card debt is obviously living paycheck to paycheck, they list out their assets, and a $4k mortgage is very obviously a slow slide into default based on the numbers given.

But congrats on your $4k mortgage I guess.

RPATDO_LAMD
Mar 22, 2013

🐘🪠🍆

drk posted:

If I read that right her semi-liquid net worth is less than $100k, and she thinks she can pay $48k/year in mortgage for 15 years plus other life expenses for the rest of her life with that money?

She has a pension as well but she didn't say how much it would pay.
She also seems to think taking out a loan against her 401k will somehow give her extra "free money" that she doesn't have to pay back.

drk
Jan 16, 2005
I missed the part where she says she has a state pension, but even a pretty generous one isnt going to cover her expenses if her salary didnt before

Better get that ex and the adult children paying some rent or kick them out and downsize

obi_ant
Apr 8, 2005

Leon Trotsky 2012 posted:

She also didn't have a 401k, because you can only get a 453(b), but she did not have one of those either.

I know a guy that has 100% matching on their 401k and they've never signed up for it. I told them they needed to sign up literally yesterday, three years later...

acidx
Sep 24, 2019

right clicking is stealing

RPATDO_LAMD posted:

She also seems to think taking out a loan against her 401k will somehow give her extra "free money" that she doesn't have to pay back.

She was so wrong in that section I don't even know what she was accidentally describing.

Duckman2008
Jan 6, 2010

TFW you see Flyers goaltending.
Grimey Drawer

obi_ant posted:

I know a guy that has 100% matching on their 401k and they've never signed up for it. I told them they needed to sign up literally yesterday, three years later...

Some people are just bad with money and won’t do it no matter what you try. Society basically encouraging that level of consumerism and whatever certainly doesn’t help.

notwithoutmyanus
Mar 17, 2009
Hey guys,

Web 3 is the future! I present to you:

https://etherscan.io/tx/0x81eb469f5c06de4f1bc7fd2a3ab085eb6a01bbc145fbcadd483c6433bab933cd
https://etherscan.io/tx/0x58d877f1eb8ffdb752ca8e7720ddcc9dcf1e046d9ce7acd5e6775f372cc38905
$760k (yes, thousands) in Ethereum traded for $1500 of a token, IMX. Which is worth approximately 63 cents.
https://www.coingecko.com/en/coins/immutable-x

That's it. This is called an MEV attack, and just about everything outside of Bitcoin (read: all of Ethereum) enables this as they have zero liquidity and lots of exploits come out of it.

BigHead
Jul 25, 2003
Huh?


Nap Ghost
What?

gschmidl
Sep 3, 2011

watch with knife hands


Their money is "away from them".

Vice President
Jul 4, 2007

I'm number two around here.

Super-NintendoUser posted:

:eyepop:

This is just wild you can make nearly 30k working full time at a Target or Starbucks entry level. How you do stay at a place for 15+ years (at I guess a medium sized company maybe > ~290 employees given the tone) and only be making 30k after years of raises.

Target or Starbucks don't have the "cadillac" health insurance plans that many government jobs come with at the 30k/year salary level positions. Take a lower salary for 30 years but pay less for healthcare that covers a lot more than the average plan. That adds up pre-retirement especially if you have any kind of chronic health issues at all as you age.

Generally pensions are a percentage of some combination of your final salary or the average salary of your last several years of employment, with a multiplier based on years of service. I tried to think of the state that might have the shittiest state employee pension system (because we can't fund those lazy government bureaucrats after all) and found this on Florida's retirement system page: https://www.myfrs.com/FRSPro_ComparePlan_BenificCal.htm

1.60% x Years of Service x Average Last 8 Years of Salary

They give an example of $34,549 for the average final salary, so it looks like if I did the math right that comes out to about $16.5k/yr or $1,381.96 a month, so hopefully combine that fully (probably) guaranteed monthly income with social security (although not all gov't employees contribute to SS so they might not get anything) plus hopefully investing in an IRA, plus hopefully a spouse's retirement benefits, and that's not terrible at all.

notwithoutmyanus
Mar 17, 2009

Imagine saying "I want $760k of tesla shares" and getting $1500 of shares, all 760k gone. That's crypto, defi specifically

Super-NintendoUser
Jan 16, 2004

COWABUNGERDER COMPADRES
Soiled Meat

Vice President posted:

Target or Starbucks don't have the "cadillac" health insurance plans that many government jobs come with at the 30k/year salary level positions. Take a lower salary for 30 years but pay less for healthcare that covers a lot more than the average plan. That adds up pre-retirement especially if you have any kind of chronic health issues at all as you age.

Generally pensions are a percentage of some combination of your final salary or the average salary of your last several years of employment, with a multiplier based on years of service. I tried to think of the state that might have the shittiest state employee pension system (because we can't fund those lazy government bureaucrats after all) and found this on Florida's retirement system page: https://www.myfrs.com/FRSPro_ComparePlan_BenificCal.htm

1.60% x Years of Service x Average Last 8 Years of Salary

They give an example of $34,549 for the average final salary, so it looks like if I did the math right that comes out to about $16.5k/yr or $1,381.96 a month, so hopefully combine that fully (probably) guaranteed monthly income with social security (although not all gov't employees contribute to SS so they might not get anything) plus hopefully investing in an IRA, plus hopefully a spouse's retirement benefits, and that's not terrible at all.

I understand the math behind that, but I'm curious if you had real raises and good income you could save considerably more for retirement in a 401k, and at 32k/year how do you possibly afford to buy a house or even live day to day?

MrAmazing
Jun 21, 2005

Super-NintendoUser posted:

I understand the math behind that, but I'm curious if you had real raises and good income you could save considerably more for retirement in a 401k, and at 32k/year how do you possibly afford to buy a house or even live day to day?

It’s mostly a math question and for certain definitions of real raises and good income the answer is yes.

I don’t know Debbie’s specific scenario but a lot of these situations seem to arise where the person either isn’t able to get a better paying job or is in a job that is more of a calling than a job (social work, teaching etc).

Cyrano4747
Sep 25, 2006

Yes, I know I'm old, get off my fucking lawn so I can yell at these clouds.

Super-NintendoUser posted:

I understand the math behind that, but I'm curious if you had real raises and good income you could save considerably more for retirement in a 401k, and at 32k/year how do you possibly afford to buy a house or even live day to day?

Depends a LOT on where you live.

I'm not going to use numbers from that Florida one because I don't know what the deal is in Flordia's system, but you find some similarly extremely low paying jobs on the Federal side of things as well. The pay bands are all out there as public record:

https://www.federalpay.org/gs/2022

So band 1 of GS-9 (which is where you find a lot of subject matter experts on a thing or skilled technical workers) is only $47k. GS-12 is deep into supervisory territory to the point where you're going to be a department chief or something and that's only $68.

BUT, federal jobs have locality pay. They take the COL of the area where the job is into account and adjust accordingly. So if you're working for the Bureau of Land Management somewhere in bum gently caress nowhere Montanna you might actually be making pretty near the base pay. But if you're in DC you get a 31.5% locality bump and that entry level GS-9 job is now getting $61k/yr.

And remember that's just band one. So do a few years, don't be a fuckup, and you're going to move up the pay chart even if you don't actually get promoted to a higher job category. By the time you get half-way through the GS9 bands our hypothetical lab worker or SME is making $70k/yr.

Which isn't crazy money in the DC area, but the benefits are amazing and if you have a dual-income household you can get by pretty well. It's not uncommon for people to double-dip, with one spouse getting under-paid relative to their credentials and expertise but pulling in crazy loving benefits that helps them both, while the other takes a higher paid job in the non-government world (assuming similar educational levels, income potentials etc).

edit: there are also a LOT of ex-military in the federal ranks due to veteran preference hires. I forget exactly how all that works but there are ways to roll years of active duty service over into calculating things like pension eligibility etc.

Cyrano4747 fucked around with this message at 14:08 on Oct 17, 2022

The junk collector
Aug 10, 2005
Hey do you want that motherboard?
For an external reference, that GS-9 level Cyrano is quoting is where the cap is $61k is where the federal government places engineers. Fresh out of college, they bring them on at GS-7 with automatic promotions each year so they reach GS-9 in 2 years. Engineers are eligible for promotion up to GS-11 without special permitting but only in certain departments.

I did the Federal employment bit for a few years and the chief thing that kept anyone there was a combination of benefits and inertia. The medical benefits package was excellent and you got paid overtime regardless of your GS level, though after a certain point a sliding scale starts that decreases 1.5x pay to 1x pay. It's extremely reliable employment, so someone who been doing $15/hr at target but fighting with their manager to get shifts doesn't have to deal with any of that. You also get a lot of vacation time each year after you've been there a few years. The pension system is also extremely important to someone who doesn't make enough money to comfortably put some into their 401k each paycheck. All of that said, the pension benefits have been pretty significantly scaled back over the last 20 years so the calculus may be getting worse.

RocknRollaAyatollah
Nov 26, 2008

Lipstick Apathy
Florida has been purposely destroying the state pension system for at least 20 years. They've been pushing new employees onto 401K investment plans too to try to kill the pension, which they might actually do in the near future. Florida's management of the pension is also bad because they didn't do things like divest themselves from Russian enterprises in the lead up and initial invasion of Ukraine. Florida actually invested more in Russian enterprises in the lead up to the war, which is pretty BWM. The state reportedly lost around $200 million dollars by March of 2022 due to this. Almost all the other benefits offered by the state unsurprisingly suck too.

brugroffil
Nov 30, 2015


My dad left the corporate tax world to go work for the IRS fifteen years ago and never looked back. He's been full time work from home for a decade and never has to work nights or weekends. Compared to the regular Tax Season 70+ hour weeks he worked several months every year whole I was growing up, it is a much better balance.

My brother works for the state government. His total comp isn't too bad. The work stress is low, he gets to help people, and you punch out strictly at 4pm and are done for the day.

It can offer pretty substantial benefits in the work/life balance area.

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Cyrano4747
Sep 25, 2006

Yes, I know I'm old, get off my fucking lawn so I can yell at these clouds.

brugroffil posted:

My dad left the corporate tax world to go work for the IRS fifteen years ago and never looked back. He's been full time work from home for a decade and never has to work nights or weekends. Compared to the regular Tax Season 70+ hour weeks he worked several months every year whole I was growing up, it is a much better balance.

My brother works for the state government. His total comp isn't too bad. The work stress is low, he gets to help people, and you punch out strictly at 4pm and are done for the day.

It can offer pretty substantial benefits in the work/life balance area.

There is also a lot of job security. After you make it through your probationary period it's a lot, lot harder to fire or lay off a government employee than a private sector one.

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