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Mu Zeta posted:Anyone have good penmanship? This is an odd thing for me because I'm left-handed so not only did I start off at a disadvantage I also had (being born in Generation Jones) I had to deal with officious teachers still trying to get me to write right-handed at times. Fortunately that was halted by principals but my handwriting was atrocious until I discovered Tolkien and his various scripts. I really liked the sources he drew from particularly uncial and wanted to emulate it which had a magical effect on my handwriting and I learnt to completely reinvent my handwriting style, this was when I was about 14-15. My presentation marks went from about 8-15 in a single semester. So yeah, autists, we do it our way  Now of course they've gone back to a scrawl since I've been touch-typing for decades but if I took the time to write again I'd probably improve
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Oct 12, 2022 10:29
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So I was apparently diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder when I was around 10-12. I remember talking to doctors then, but no one actually told me about my diagnosis until I was in my early 30s and requested my medical records from the hospital for an unrelated(?) situation (I'm also bipolar, although I'm on medication now and it fortunately hasn't been a big deal since). My mother claims not to understand why I'm upset about this. Anyway, I never really suspected until I saw it written down, but I guess it wasn't a huge surprise? I was somewhere in college before I developed my social skills to a degree where I didn't seem kind of "weird," although I've never had a problem with eye contact in particular. I've gotten decent enough at handling myself in social settings (which is apparently called "masking"), but I still often can't make sense out of other people's emotional reactions. Life is a lot easier when I can talk to other nerds about nerd stuff. >_> I pace around a lot. I think that might be part of my stimming, or something? I'm pretty sure my dad is also on the spectrum, although he wasn't ever diagnosed (I know he had some issues at school when he was young). I've heard him complain about some of the same issues I have, like people not listening to exactly what I say and misinterpreting it. I guess I'm lucky, though, since I don't really need much support and I can live just fine by myself. I'm an attorney working in document review, which is not a glamorous job but it's something I'm pretty good at. My handwriting is...not pretty, but legible. I can barely remember how to write in cursive (aside from my own name) despite having practiced it in school, though.
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Oct 29, 2022 17:02
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Jefepato posted:So I was apparently diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder when I was around 10-12. I remember talking to doctors then, but no one actually told me about my diagnosis until I was in my early 30s and requested my medical records from the hospital for an unrelated(?) situation (I'm also bipolar, although I'm on medication now and it fortunately hasn't been a big deal since). loving hell that must have been a bit of a revelation. Glad you're doing okay! Being misunderstood constantly is the main thing that makes me suspect I might be on the spectrum. If I had one wish, I would wish that everyone would just give me the benefit of the doubt and not assume I'm saying something with a bunch of hidden meanings that they can get upset about. I don't even know how to do that, goddamn it. I never know what I said to make people suddenly get all upset.
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Oct 29, 2022 18:03
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For me the clicker was how bad I am at socialising, specifically "are we actually 'friends' friends or are they just being nice", and "how do I start talking to this person." That is something historically that I have gotten wrong to the point I used to have selective mutism in certain situations. I used to be depressed about being a tremendous failure which in turn let me to cling to any socialisation or validation I could get, and kept constantly burning out. Now I like time alone and am incredibly protective over it. I socialise, but because I want to, not because I have to. Jefepato posted:So I was apparently diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder when I was around 10-12. I remember talking to doctors then, but no one actually told me about my diagnosis until I was in my early 30s and requested my medical records from the hospital for an unrelated(?) situation (I'm also bipolar, although I'm on medication now and it fortunately hasn't been a big deal since). As it stands she's said a few times about kids that she wouldn't "want them labelled with that," and at one point in the past said something like "if you were little with how things are now 'they' would probably diagnose you with something" in a derisive tone. I have my suspicions but yeah, man, if they'd known and not told me I think it would irreperably damage our relationship for sure. Your feelings are 100% valid on this. Jefepato posted:I'm an attorney working in document review, which is not a glamorous job but it's something I'm pretty good at.
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Oct 29, 2022 18:44
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Jefepato posted:So I was apparently diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder when I was around 10-12. I remember talking to doctors then, but no one actually told me about my diagnosis until I was in my early 30s and requested my medical records from the hospital for an unrelated(?) situation (I'm also bipolar, although I'm on medication now and it fortunately hasn't been a big deal since). That's kinda really hosed up. And gently caress yea pace all ya want, it's nice to the brain. Cool it sounds like you've gotten on well enough.
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Oct 29, 2022 21:35
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Socializing is weird. Most of the time I feel like I'm just going through the motions (and honestly it's kind of tiresome), until I'm talking to someone that I actually "click" with, and then I suddenly become a lot more talkative. I guess I talked a lot in general when I was a kid, but eventually I was like "wait, my parents don't really care about whatever video game I've been playing lately, do they?" and I started trying to only talk to people about things they would actually care about or things that won't sound overly "weird" to them. This can be tough, because I don't really have enough "normal"-sounding interests to fill the air when I'm dealing with people who aren't also nerds, but asking people about themselves more than I talk about myself seems to help (even though it's not exactly interesting). I really have trouble thinking of myself as likable, but apparently some people do like me. I guess trying to be inoffensive makes you seem "nice" when there are so many jerks in the world. I certainly don't seem "nice" from my own perspective; I don't wish any harm on anyone, but most of the time I'd rather be alone. I have a few friends who I enjoy spending time with, but I still get emotionally worn out after a few hours even if I'm having fun. (That much might be normal even for introverts who aren't autistic, though. I'm not sure.) Relationships are not even on my radar. I don't think I'm aromantic or anything (but then, I'm not sure how I would know if I was), but the idea of a romantic relationship just sounds like way too much work. Bobby Deluxe posted:If I found out my parents knew about this when I was younger, I'd be livid. Every time I failed at something, every time I misunderstood my reaction or capacity, every single time I beat myself up or cried or felt like I was going to explode from stress, if i'd just loving known I could have dealt with it. Thanks. I really appreciate hearing that; my parents...could be a lot worse, but my mother is not great about taking accountability for her own mistakes. Usually if I complain about something that involved her in the past, she'll say she doesn't remember it. (Which is entirely plausible since she's in her 70s, but it doesn't feel good to hear.) I don't want to use autism as an excuse to be a jerk, but it would be nice if people who were upset with me explained why. Bobby Deluxe posted:Please tell me more about this job, it sounds lovely. My last project actually required us to type out a brief summary of every document, but that's not typical. I find it pretty easy, although having reviewed other people's work on a number of occasions, I'm surprised by how bad some people are at it. (You'd think people who have all passed the bar would be at least minimally competent.) And it pays pretty well for what it is. The real problem is that it's temp work, so the job isn't always reliable; I've had projects that lasted almost a year, but some projects only last a few weeks or even a few days. COVID honestly worked out really well for us, because now remote projects are more common. Remote work is great because I don't have to spend two hours on a train to and from Chicago every day. If I could reliably do this full-time, I'd be set.
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Oct 30, 2022 01:28
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The job sounds great, there's something about solving legal things as if they're puzzles that always really appealed to me. Unfortunately I also have a lot of ADHD comorbidity and my memory has never been great, so when I tried to do it at college I ended up getting ungraded, which in the UK means it was so bad the examiner refused to finish marking it. When I requested a remark, it was because I essentially argued the morality of the examples instead of just listing the case law so... Yeah. I still watch TV law shows, and that does me. But a job where they pay you to sit on your own and solve puzzles in peace sounds incredibly satisfying to me. Jefepato posted:I guess I talked a lot in general when I was a kid, but eventually I was like "wait, my parents don't really care about whatever video game I've been playing lately, do they?" and I started trying to only talk to people about things they would actually care about or things that won't sound overly "weird" to them. And that was that, I cut down on the infodumping, which if you don't know the term please look it up, I love love LOVE new autistic people reading about it and going like "You knew? You all knew this was a thing?? THAT I was doing???" Hell I'm so sneaky I'm doing it right now.
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Oct 30, 2022 02:58
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Jefepato posted:Socializing is weird. Most of the time I feel like I'm just going through the motions (and honestly it's kind of tiresome), until I'm talking to someone that I actually "click" with, and then I suddenly become a lot more talkative. I guess I talked a lot in general when I was a kid, but eventually I was like "wait, my parents don't really care about whatever video game I've been playing lately, do they?" and I started trying to only talk to people about things they would actually care about or things that won't sound overly "weird" to them. This can be tough, because I don't really have enough "normal"-sounding interests to fill the air when I'm dealing with people who aren't also nerds, but asking people about themselves more than I talk about myself seems to help (even though it's not exactly interesting). Hey, that sounds awfully familiar. Figuring out that people were not interested in listening to me talk about my interests is probably the main reason why I stayed under the radar for so long. I pretty much went the other extreme and convinced myself that I had absolutely no special interests at all. Anybody asking about my hobbies gets some non-commital "I like reading" answer, then I go back to listening to people talk, because that's easier. It's only recently that I started to look at some of my hobbies in that light and admitted that, okay, maybe a collection of 1000 .mid files that I kept optimizing for whatever soundcard I currently had would fit the definition of absorbing interest, and maybe I do know a little bit too much trivia about my favorite TV shows and games. I'm still not comfortable talking about them to anyone, because I have it fixed in my mind that nobody is going to be interested in anything I care about.
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Oct 30, 2022 09:09
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Jefepato posted:Socializing is weird. Most of the time I feel like I'm just going through the motions (and honestly it's kind of tiresome), until I'm talking to someone that I actually "click" with, and then I suddenly become a lot more talkative. I guess I talked a lot in general when I was a kid, but eventually I was like "wait, my parents don't really care about whatever video game I've been playing lately, do they?" and I started trying to only talk to people about things they would actually care about or things that won't sound overly "weird" to them. This can be tough, because I don't really have enough "normal"-sounding interests to fill the air when I'm dealing with people who aren't also nerds, but asking people about themselves more than I talk about myself seems to help (even though it's not exactly interesting). Big same to just about all of that. I still remember more or less the exact moment I realized (or rather, was told) that my parents didn't particularly care about my interests and didn't have the energy to keep up with me going on about them. I still have the reflex of pre-emptively trying to downplay or act embarrassed about my interests whenever they come up, though I've been trying to unlearn that habit recently.
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Oct 30, 2022 10:27
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Perestroika posted:Big same to just about all of that. I still remember more or less the exact moment I realized (or rather, was told) that my parents didn't particularly care about my interests and didn't have the energy to keep up with me going on about them. I still have the reflex of pre-emptively trying to downplay or act embarrassed about my interests whenever they come up, though I've been trying to unlearn that habit recently. Oh man I kind of fell into the "liking things is cringe" crowd for lack of a better term as a teen probably due to something like this and only recently in my 30's am I realizing this and trying to unfuck myself out of it. It sucks, just like things! You're allowed to! But my brain still goes "no, no like, like cringe"
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Nov 23, 2022 21:51
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I just wanna say I watched every episode of The Rehearsal yesterday and it's the most autistic thing I've ever seen in my life, it rules. And not even for the immediately obvious reasons you'd think from the basic premise.
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Nov 24, 2022 00:59
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Organza Quiz posted:I just wanna say I watched every episode of The Rehearsal yesterday and it's the most autistic thing I've ever seen in my life, it rules. And not even for the immediately obvious reasons you'd think from the basic premise. this was my exact reaction  both feeling that way and coming into this thread to post about it
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Nov 24, 2022 01:53
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Came from the ADD thread. I'm engaged to literally an autism therapy person, so I'm likely not on the spectrum in any way that matters. But I do have ADD and lots of nerdy interests and terrible self esteem and didn't have many friends growing up, so I feel like my experiences may be similar? Cloacamazing! posted:Hey, that sounds awfully familiar. Figuring out that people were not interested in listening to me talk about my interests is probably the main reason why I stayed under the radar for so long. I pretty much went the other extreme and convinced myself that I had absolutely no special interests at all. Anybody asking about my hobbies gets some non-commital "I like reading" answer, then I go back to listening to people talk, because that's easier. I'm now uncomfortable with revealing any of my interests or what I like at all, even to the extent of not playing music in the car when other people are there so I don't have their complaining or mockery. As I've gotten older, them doing this is rarer, but I still try not to. Of course with newer technology they can just plug in their own phone and don't have to put up with whatever is in the CD player, and this usually happens after a song of mine or two. Jefepato posted:Socializing is weird. Most of the time I feel like I'm just going through the motions (and honestly it's kind of tiresome), until I'm talking to someone that I actually "click" with, and then I suddenly become a lot more talkative. I guess I talked a lot in general when I was a kid, but eventually I was like "wait, my parents don't really care about whatever video game I've been playing lately, do they?" and I started trying to only talk to people about things they would actually care about or things that won't sound overly "weird" to them. This can be tough, because I don't really have enough "normal"-sounding interests to fill the air when I'm dealing with people who aren't also nerds, but asking people about themselves more than I talk about myself seems to help (even though it's not exactly interesting). I tend to talk in small talk patterns with people, even and especially with people I see frequently.This makes me boring and weird, I don't really know what it is people even are supposed to talk about. I reasoned this to mean they are merely tolerating my presence in general and no discussion is good enough for them, because the rejection has already taken place and they would very much prefer I leave.
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Nov 29, 2022 03:41
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skooma512 posted:Came from the ADD thread. I'm engaged to literally an autism therapy person, so I'm likely not on the spectrum in any way that matters. You should read the intro chapters of the book Journal of Best Practices
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Nov 29, 2022 22:53
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I just saw an article about using pressure tanks to treat autism. Apparently it relieves inflammation in the brain and improves oxygen delivery, which if autistic brains process like 40% more info than otherwise, I can see how that might reduce the wear and tear we experience. Here's the article, feel free to proceed to dash my hopes about this https://scitechdaily.com/autism-breakthrough-new-treatment-significantly-improves-social-skills-and-brain-function/
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Nov 30, 2022 02:54
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Had my first meltdown in months today dealing with lovely RJ45 connectors of all things, feels bad man. 
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Nov 30, 2022 04:23
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e.pilot posted:Had my first meltdown in months today dealing with lovely RJ45 connectors of all things, feels bad man. I nearly destroyed my toilet when changing the seat cover. Turns out the new one I got didn't have the right parts which is why I was feeling like an idiot and why my toilet seat is still wobbly after getting a brand new one.
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Nov 30, 2022 18:18
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One thing that will almost always gently caress me up is something that should work, but doesn't, usually because of shoddy workmanship on the part of the manufacturer. There is always a little, indignant part of me that's like "It said it does the thing! Why is it not doing the thing?!" Bonus blowout points if it is sitting there acting as if it is doing the thing, and not only not doing the thing, but any error checking systems are acting as if it is doing the thing, and there's no way to tell it to retry the thing because it thinks its doing it.
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Dec 1, 2022 05:21
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Bobby Deluxe posted:One thing that will almost always gently caress me up is something that should work, but doesn't, usually because of shoddy workmanship on the part of the manufacturer. 
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Dec 1, 2022 05:53
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Hello! I found out I had Asperger's syndrome at age 29, but didn't get anywhere close to an all-around understanding of it till this year (34) when I read The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome, spaced throughout the year. Turns out I've been running under a rather strong handicap(?) with weak central coherence skills and extremely poor working memory issues, both of which you really need to make any sort of traction in academics. In other words I gotta study up to four times as much to get the same returns as a normal Joe would since the info won't stick as well, I can't cram period, and because of said WM issues, can only recall a fraction of that knowledge I studied for under any sort of pressure. Naturally this gave me Testophobia which I had no idea was a thing until a few weeks ago. I may be forced to go back to school in the future. It's the only pathway towards my immigration and I have no clue where to begin on how to tackle any of this if I want to not fail I guess. Could use some tips on how to best overcome these struggles if you got any! EDIT: organburner posted:I was constantly in trouble in school for my bad penmanship and despite trying so loving hard to remedy it I just... I can't. My hand just starts cramping up after a little bit of writing. Nah you can do it, you're drawing skills will hit you in waves when you're an Aspie, not slow but steady progress like the others, I made a thread for my art struggles here Didn't pick up a pen till I almost graduated HS too, never too late! Also the reason you have bad handwriting is because of Macrographia. Finally, people with Asperger's have the unique ability to draw the colors of sound, it's extraordinarily unique and you should get in on that action. White Light fucked around with this message at 08:06 on Dec 7, 2022 |
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Dec 7, 2022 07:35
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I survived some of my tests at uni by reverting to the extremely basic drill of “look, cover, write, check” to help memorise formula but this probably won’t work for broader pieces of knowledge. However I accidentally memorised where domestic tropical fish come from, what water chemistry, temperature and dietary requirements they have, with no intention or effort. If you can find something you are genuinely interested in, in a special interest sort of way, and change or guide your studies in that direction it will be much easier - but special interests are kind of unpredictable and sometimes that interest doesn’t last. Hopefully you can make it work long enough to qualify for whatever it is you need to qualify for and then it doesn’t matter if it doesn’t stick in the long term. You really can’t force yourself to care about stuff you don’t care about, in my experience. Edit: oh! White light it’s you! I enjoyed your posts in the daily art thread. Thought the escaping facial features conversation was kind of funny though, I interpreted that character as being somewhat not human since she has impossibly large eyes with vertical slits so her face is naturally going to be a bit off.
Stoca Zola fucked around with this message at 07:53 on Dec 7, 2022 |
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Dec 7, 2022 07:49
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drat someone's gotta make a study guide for Aspies or something, really wears you down when you give it your best only to keep getting rolled by a dude who's putting in bare minimum effort, really kills your drive. EDIT: ⬆️I had an aspie moment in da thread and was trying to help out but I didn't 'read the room' like usual and made a big mistake cause it turns we're not supposed to give tips  White Light fucked around with this message at 08:04 on Dec 7, 2022 |
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Dec 7, 2022 07:53
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I knew it and I really felt for you and hoped you weren't about to get dogpiled. But also sympathetic pain of having done that myself many times, to the point that now sometimes I spend tooooo long reading the room and get used to being passive. It was good seeing you jump in all gung ho. What kind of academia/studies are you involved in, and how flexible are your options? I think it's pretty important to try and play to your strengths and really guard your weaknesses carefully, learn about and be wary of autistic burnout and do everything you can to protect yourself from ending up in that kind of situation. I had no idea for years but in the last year before total burnout I could feel things were going very wrong, I'd be getting home and just laying on the floor unable to deal with anything - looking back I guess that's shutting down. It's been really hard trying to recover from burn out, maybe everything is 8 times harder instead of 4 times and it takes me a long time to get anything done because it's so hard to stay focused. My point is no matter what, you have to stay alert and take care of yourself because no one else can and this poo poo can really sneak up on you and hit really hard. Be as kind to yourself as you can.
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Dec 7, 2022 09:52
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Have you tried to figure out how you retain information best? I have a way better auditory memory, so I studied by reading things out loud or saying them in my head, which helped a lot. We're usually only taught visual learning at school, so if that's not your thing, this might help. Being interested in my subject was obviously the biggest help though. I can talk your ear off about food law, which is very helpful if that's what you're tested on. Since you mentioned developing test anxiety, what helped me with mine was analyzing the effect it had on me. It doesn't start during the exam, the fear prevents you from studying as well. I learned the effects this had on me, and once I recognized the symptoms, I was able to distance myself from it by saying "I know what's going on, this is the anxiety again. This is my brain being an rear end in a top hat again.". Got enough studying done to scrape by at least.
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Dec 7, 2022 10:14
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White Light posted:drat someone's gotta make a study guide for Aspies or something, really wears you down when you give it your best only to keep getting rolled by a dude who's putting in bare minimum effort, really kills your drive. Aw heck I'm sorry it made you feel bad! Nobody was cross or anything I don't think. Just one of those moments and everyone understood you were well-intentioned!
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Dec 7, 2022 12:10
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White Light posted:
Yeah I'm still slowly working at it because being able to do 2d art would be very nice for my 3d and gamedev hobbies. Gonna see if I can find a copy of that book somewhere.
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Dec 7, 2022 12:30
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organburner posted:Yeah I'm still slowly working at it because being able to do 2d art would be very nice for my 3d and gamedev hobbies. Gonna see if I can find a copy of that book somewhere. I've found Drawfee's drawclass videos very useful! they go over how to practise and such in a very understandable way.
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Dec 7, 2022 12:38
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HopperUK posted:I've found Drawfee's drawclass videos very useful! they go over how to practise and such in a very understandable way. I was recommended the art and science of drawing so I'm going through that right now but I might check out drawfee as well.
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Dec 7, 2022 15:07
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mystes fucked around with this message at 19:34 on Dec 11, 2022 |
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Dec 9, 2022 05:22
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There's really no reason *not* to get assessed if you can access it.
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Dec 9, 2022 05:27
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HopperUK posted:There's really no reason *not* to get assessed if you can access it. If you have any wonky job requirements it might not be in your best interests. But that aside go for it.
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Dec 9, 2022 05:29
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mystes fucked around with this message at 19:34 on Dec 11, 2022 |
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Dec 9, 2022 05:37
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mystes fucked around with this message at 19:35 on Dec 11, 2022 |
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Dec 9, 2022 13:39
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mystes posted:Sorry for making so many posts and obviously I just need to shut up and go get assessed but I just want to clarify for anyone who had the misfortune of reading my previous post that after thinking about this way too long, I realized I'm a total idiot. You don't need to apologise for posting about yourself here in the 'what the hell is going on with me anyway' thread  Yeah, autism care and diagnosis is in a poo poo place now but it's been a lot worse. If you'd like more specific advice about how to get an assessment, if you mention roughly where you are - even down to the country or state - someone might be able to give advice. Cool if you're not comfortable putting that out there, though.
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Dec 9, 2022 13:43
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https://youtu.be/EZ7cStxqgFE?t=628 Tag yourself; I'm possessed by Body Snatcher. The rest of the video is good too.
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Dec 9, 2022 16:18
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Mamkute posted:https://youtu.be/EZ7cStxqgFE?t=628 Aw Christ that's loving dire. Here, I'll pull the relevant image out (although the video is good):  Thank goodness for Superflex or I might fall to the dark side of imagining that my feelings and desires have validity!  Also I'm Worry Wall but mostly because my limbic system was utterly broken by being Glassman as a kid, yay.
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Dec 9, 2022 16:41
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Mamkute posted:https://youtu.be/EZ7cStxqgFE?t=628 I'm One-sided Sid because I can't really relate to people unless we share a particular experience, so I end up talking about my own experiences too much.
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Dec 9, 2022 21:54
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Hoo boy, I'm a bunch of them. But if I have to pick one it's Rock Brain (hyperfixation go brr)
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Dec 9, 2022 22:07
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mystes fucked around with this message at 19:36 on Dec 11, 2022 |
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Dec 10, 2022 00:22
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Quorum posted:Aw Christ that's loving dire. Here, I'll pull the relevant image out (although the video is good): Apparently when I write stuff I turn into Glassman haha thats cool.
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Dec 10, 2022 06:43
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