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Cassette Moodcore posted:in terms of bottle aversion, late to the party and it’s probably not relevant but our kid had a lot of issues due to being born early as mom had a lot of pregnancy issues and kid had colic and bottle aversion, it was awful Thanks for the aversion advice all. We've tried to be diligent about relaxing the feeding anxiety on our end (lol) and it seems to have helped. Which is good because we have work to do now on sleep routines and naps. Just went full Danish on our girl today and left her outside in her stroller to finish a nap.
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Jan 1, 2023 02:07
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Another new year is here ish. Good luck parents.
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Jan 1, 2023 03:12
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my youngest is the most stubborn rear end in a top hat on the planet. that is all.
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Jan 1, 2023 05:47
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DR FRASIER KRANG posted:my youngest is the most stubborn rear end in a top hat on the planet. No. Also happy new year. The baby is celebrating with green poo poo and much crying. On the plus side I finally got around to figuring out how to put him in a wrap on my chest. Which made hours of walking back and forth in the living room much more comfortable.
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Jan 1, 2023 10:51
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Chad Sexington posted:Thanks for the aversion advice all. We've tried to be diligent about relaxing the feeding anxiety on our end (lol) and it seems to have helped. Feel free to pm if you want an extremely detailed discussion of baby intestines and poops. thats pretty much my entire life rn and for the past 3 years
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Jan 1, 2023 17:59
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https://youtu.be/HU1HReY-HX8
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Jan 1, 2023 19:37
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Sometimes I loving hate having a kid. It is life destroying. And I only have one! I dunno how you people with 2 (or more than 2  ) do it.I am currently battling a chest infection he brought home from nursery. The fucker. It has floored me. And I can't rest and get better because he demands constant loving attention. I can't even get a nice restorative sleep because he wakes us up. Nursery is shut over the holidays so he's here, all the time, being a toddler. He's being a toddler! Why would he do this to us. Kill me.
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Jan 2, 2023 18:45
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Microplastics posted:Sometimes I loving hate having a kid. It is life destroying. And I only have one! I dunno how you people with 2 (or more than 2 yeah its hosed man. older parents laugh when i say i cant wait for them to be teenagers but cmon. fine! sleep in until 2pm and be rude and play video games all the time, awesome, just let me do anything.
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Jan 2, 2023 18:52
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parenting can be very hard. my son is extremely attached to me, the point of refusing comfort/attention from his mom and saying "no i want daddy". yesterday i was feeling really sick and exhausted, i just wanted to nap, but it was impossible because he just sat outside my door and cried and yelled "i want my daddy". very difficult! and i couldn't even go to bed before him for the same reason, only i can do the bedtime ritual, he doesnt want to hear stories or songs from his mom. i feel bad for my wife because it probably doesn't feel good to be rejected by a toddler lol. we also have a newborn so its just hard all around. i wish daycare was open today. at least he slept through the night last night, i got a lot of sleep and feel a lot better today.
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Jan 2, 2023 18:55
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Twins most awake part of the day is 1am to 4am, they are nite crew as gently caress They're eating and pooping well and that's all that matters
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Jan 2, 2023 18:59
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bitmap posted:yeah its hosed man. older parents laugh when i say i cant wait for them to be teenagers but cmon. fine! sleep in until 2pm and be rude and play video games all the time, awesome, just let me do anything. my favorite lately is my dad trying to "coach" me about parenting and how I need to work with my wife as a team and all this poo poo and i'm thinking "dude... all i remember was being scared you were gonna spank me for something inconsequential." Meanwhile my mom (who did like 80-90% of the child rearing) offers advice if i ask but generally just listens and suggests things to try that might be helpful but isn't pushy about it.
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Jan 2, 2023 19:04
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our parents are generally chill but it feels like every time we talk about our parenting approach, whether it's sleep training or just how we handle tantrums it's taken as an indictment from how they raised us. and it's not! a lot of the information about sids wasn't available when they were new parents! you make the best decisions you can at the time! augh! Cassette Moodcore posted:in terms of bottle aversion, late to the party and it’s probably not relevant but our kid had a lot of issues due to being born early as mom had a lot of pregnancy issues and kid had colic and bottle aversion, it was awful once we pieced together all the problems the dairy allergy was causing before we were able to get it diagnosed everything made so much more sense. apparently we weren't terrible parents or the kid was uniquely challenging, it's just that she was suffering and we had no idea why. I 100% know what you're talking about in those early days. felt like we were going nuts and describing some of the symptoms we got "well that's how babies are sometimes" since it's been diagnosed and we cut it from her diet everything's been way way way better. we've started the milk ladder and it's been going pretty well too so hopefully she's growing out of it. Dreylad has issued a correction as of 19:08 on Jan 2, 2023 |
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Jan 2, 2023 19:06
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Dreylad posted:our parents are generally chill but it feels like every time we talk about our parenting approach, whether it's sleep training or just how we handle tantrums it's taken as an indictment from how they raised us. lol yeah before my son was born i had a talk with my mom that was like "i think you were a good mom, i think you did a good job raising me, if i do something different from how you did it that doesn't mean you were a bad parent, it isn't an indictment of you or of my childhood, it's not a criticism or a judgment, it's just different". it was kind of successful but i still have to remind her from time to time. i guess it helps that its true and i generally had a good childhood and think she did a good job lol
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Jan 2, 2023 19:08
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lobster shirt posted:lol yeah before my son was born i had a talk with my mom that was like "i think you were a good mom, i think you did a good job raising me, if i do something different from how you did it that doesn't mean you were a bad parent, it isn't an indictment of you or of my childhood, it's not a criticism or a judgment, it's just different". it was kind of successful but i still have to remind her from time to time. Yeah that sounds like a really good way to approach it and we should have done it. We've had to sort of have that talk every few months, but it's getting better, especially around sleep training where they can see how good the little girl is at sleeping now.
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Jan 2, 2023 19:10
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My dad was fine in the scheme of things, on the Dad Scale as I understand it he was really nowhere near the bottom of it, but he apparently made a decision when I was born that his main goal would be to make sure I didn't turn out egotistical and could laugh at myself etc, and he did such a good job of that that I was a depressed child with self-loathing issues and a defensive streak that continues to this day. I teared up during his speech at my wedding because I had never heard him say nice things about me before so yeah I'm basically taking the extremely bold and controversial parenting stance of "be supportive toward your children and make sure they know you love them", will report back on effect once it is known
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Jan 2, 2023 19:14
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Once I found out kid #2 will be a boy I had a short dilemma w/r/t how my parenting strategy would differ toward raising a boy from the strategy we've been using to raise our daughter, and I eventually settled on "it won't". I don't think there are any values or strengths that I want one kid to have and not the other. My dad fundamentally seeing my sister as a fragile waif to be protected and me as a potential rear end in a top hat that needed to be reined in was probably the source of a lot of his mistakes. My mom was fine. She's still fine. Her biggest fault is that she's very emotionally needy, probably because she's married to my dad, who does not express positive emotions (this is a problem I have too but I'm aware of it at least)
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Jan 2, 2023 19:17
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Yeah I guess my dad does take everything as an indictment of his parenting strategy (it probably is). At one point he said that he "hoped that [I] was more worried about disappointing [him] than what [he] would do" and I just stared at him with no answer because that's 100% not true. We just didn't want to get hit you moron.
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Jan 2, 2023 19:18
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My earliest memories of playing with my dad include stuff like him saying my sister (3 years older than me; would probably win anyway) and I should race to the top of the stairs, then grabbing my ankle right when he said "go" so I'd fall down, and then he'd say "oops, sorry Loq" and they'd laugh I think that is pretty objectively hosed up!!! Anyway what I'm saying is gently caress my dad's parenting strategies, I'm glad he never tries to give me parenting advice because I would not take it well
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Jan 2, 2023 19:21
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Yeah that's hosed up poo poo. holy crap. I remember playing touch football with my dad and siblings and my dad was fond of shouting "LOSERS: WALK!" when his team scored a touchdown and the other team had to march down the other end of the field to receive a punt. Cool strategy, dad.
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Jan 2, 2023 19:22
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my dad was an alcoholic but incredibly benign, which is to say he would just drink like six or seven vodka club sodas and a couple glasses of wine between 5 and 11 pm and then go right to bed. never got mad, never yelled, never hit us, none of the bad stuff you hear about alcoholic dads. on the other hand that can still leave a hosed up legacy because that kind of drinking seemed very normal to me, and of course it allowed me to justify my own burgeoning drinking problem with "well dad did this and he was fine, very successful in his career! it's okay!" thankfully i think i can avoid passing this on to my own children by, uh, not getting blasted every night right in front of them.
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Jan 2, 2023 19:27
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my dad beat me with a leather strap so I think there'll be some generational revisions 
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Jan 2, 2023 19:29
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sorry to hear about everybody's lovely dads  Again, I try to keep some perspective here, because my dad didn't hit me or anything, and theoretically his "strategy" was based on a plan he thought out ahead of time, it's just that what he settled on was mind-bogglingly stupid, the methods were cruel, and he stuck with it so blindly that even when he ended up with a kid with severe self-esteem issues he kept, eg, making fun of me in public and getting mad when my feelings were hurt because it showed I couldn't laugh at myself (this was between the ages of 10-13 probably)
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Jan 2, 2023 19:38
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Good grief does anyone in this thread have a good relationship with their dad? I should consider myself lucky. (not perfect - he did refuse to pay £20 to get the family dog out of the pound so that was the last I saw of that fluffy friend - but still pretty drat good)
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Jan 2, 2023 19:40
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Microplastics posted:Good grief does anyone in this thread have a good relationship with their dad? I should consider myself lucky. (not perfect - he did refuse to pay £20 to get the family dog out of the pound so that was the last I saw of that fluffy friend - but still pretty drat good) Mines decent now but it wasn't for a long time A lot of it was him realizing he wasn't the best dad
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Jan 2, 2023 19:43
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my dad just constantly revises what happened or diminishes his part in anything rather than actually addressing anything he may have done wrong.
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Jan 2, 2023 19:44
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i had a pretty good relationship with my dad, he died a few years ago. the alcoholism stuff as i said didnt have a very good effect on my life but a big part of that is also my fault since, you know, i was the one who was drinking. other than that he was a pretty good dad, always very supportive of me no matter what which i think is important. i miss him sometimes and am sad he never got the chance to know his grandchildren. oh well what can ya do.
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Jan 2, 2023 19:52
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Microplastics posted:Good grief does anyone in this thread have a good relationship with their dad? I should consider myself lucky. (not perfect - he did refuse to pay £20 to get the family dog out of the pound so that was the last I saw of that fluffy friend - but still pretty drat good) my dad is great. both my parents are good. my dad has been on board with all our parenting stuff actually.
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Jan 2, 2023 19:55
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both my parents were great. I wasn’t an easy child either.
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Jan 2, 2023 19:58
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I didn't have a dad, so I guess I dodged that bullet! It does mean that I don't really have any role model for being a dad, and more importantly, for being one of two parents. The whole parent relationship and how you interact as a unit is actually slightly unfamiliar to me and something I'm still figuring out.
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Jan 2, 2023 19:58
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My biggest problem right now is my son wants me to read new Chinese language books to him faster than I can learn the characters in the current one.
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Jan 2, 2023 19:58
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my other parenting complaint today is that for the last two weeks i have either been caring for a sick toddler (covered in germs) or sick myself, so i haven't been able to hold my daughter. hopefully in a day or two i'll be able to interact with her again.
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Jan 2, 2023 20:04
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It can be tough when a kid expresses a preference for one parent over the other but the good news is they eventually grow out of it. Younger kid handed me an envelope today containing a note that simply reads "I don't love you Dada". Ok it can take a while.
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Jan 2, 2023 20:29
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our kid flips back and forth so at least we both receive equitable amounts of love/indifference
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Jan 2, 2023 21:09
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Our daughter has a daddy preference but has at least only told my wife she doesn't love her once She's learned to use it to her advantage. Lots of "do you want mommy or daddy to change this diaper" etc
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Jan 2, 2023 21:49
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Microplastics posted:Good grief does anyone in this thread have a good relationship with their dad? I should consider myself lucky. (not perfect - he did refuse to pay £20 to get the family dog out of the pound so that was the last I saw of that fluffy friend - but still pretty drat good) My parents were divorced so I just didn't see a ton of my dad except every other weekend. He was largely supportive and very passive. I've always liked him and related to him though. But consequently, my mom was the monster because she had to wrangle three boys by herself until she got remarried, and then had another kid to raise so didn't spend a ton of time on us. Lots of anger at things that often bordered on the irrational, including some hitting. I kind of justify it now as an adult that she was just trying to survive under that pressure as a single mom. But it did a number on us. I learned to just keep things to myself and lie to avoid situations where I could be yelled at. Also had quite a temper myself and weirdly nobody saw my inspiration for how to deal with my emotions! Both things I had to learn to quash as an adult, the lying especially. Distance has done wonders though. Both parents are extremely supportive. My mom thinks we're a little woo-woo because we were so diligent about avoiding COVID during pregnancy and after birth, but she's polite enough not to say anything. I definitely think I'll be more diligent about making sure my daughter is respected and heard. But I'm also more empathetic with my parents' gently caress-ups, because even with a five month old, I'm seeing how fatigue makes anger bubble to the surface more easily.
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Jan 2, 2023 22:26
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Random question, I'm trying to get my 2.5 year old boosted and apparently her main provider either isn't stocking them right now or has no plans to? I'm trying to find a place that stocks the booster that will vaccinate under 3 yrs old around Chicago if anyone has any leads.
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Jan 2, 2023 22:42
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stress will do that. I think the thing most people don’t get is that stress can do that to anybody, especially the stress of not being able to get what one thinks one needs for one’s child. the less help and less resources one has the more likely it becomes. The general anger of not having needs met gets pointed at the individuals around one. it’s very hard to deal with even if one knows exactly what it is and is self aware of it.
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Jan 2, 2023 22:43
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literally every child in our orbit, including one six states away, has had the poo poo and vomit for 24 hours bug in the past two weeks. incredible stuff.
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Jan 3, 2023 03:52
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loquacius posted:Once I found out kid #2 will be a boy I had a short dilemma w/r/t how my parenting strategy would differ toward raising a boy from the strategy we've been using to raise our daughter, and I eventually settled on "it won't". I don't think there are any values or strengths that I want one kid to have and not the other. My dad fundamentally seeing my sister as a fragile waif to be protected and me as a potential rear end in a top hat that needed to be reined in was probably the source of a lot of his mistakes. Oh hol up, there's a difference. You don't have to be as precise wiping poop with boys as you do girls. Also there is extra danger of getting peed on by boys that arn't possible by girls.  Potty Training Holiday was a complete failure. No pee in the bucket. poo poo remains the most hopeless endeavor. Like... gently caress every body else on the planet that we know can pee in a potty. What's up lil dude this is attempt #368. Every now and again I look at the picture of the first time he successfully pottied at attempt #29, when I thought it would be easy like that one time forever. Ugh piss
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Jan 3, 2023 04:05
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Benagain posted:Random question, I'm trying to get my 2.5 year old boosted and apparently her main provider either isn't stocking them right now or has no plans to? I'm trying to find a place that stocks the booster that will vaccinate under 3 yrs old around Chicago if anyone has any leads. It appears to be a real pain for under three year olds to get boosters right now. It was difficult enough for our four year old as our pediatrician's office similarly doesn't stock the booster. Don't have any specific recommendations for the Chicago area unfortunately. I'm guessing you looked into the CVS "minute clinics", which seem to be the only pharmacy option for under three year olds? Alternatively you might try checking out independent pediatric practices, some provide shots or have clinics open to non-patients. This is how we got our younger kid their primary series shots when we learned our pediatrician's office didn't provide them and none of the pharmacies had them in stock.
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Jan 3, 2023 04:06
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