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Prurient Squid posted:An army drill instructor turned record producer... screaming at the drummer for coming in too early on the intro "give me a ten-count before you drop!" |
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Jan 16, 2023 00:51
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| # ? May 25, 2024 23:07 |
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Entcounters Dating. A dating website that definitely does not match you up with sentient trees catfishing as singles. |
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Jan 16, 2023 14:51
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they bobbin on my sponge till I squarepants
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Jan 17, 2023 03:07
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calhoun posted:clever girl just lmao at her pretending like she knows how to read, acting all smart. there isn't even a cover or a title on that book and it could be upside down or completely blank inside for all we know, you're not fooling anyone!
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Jan 18, 2023 02:07
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Did you ever look down at a turd floating sideways in the toilet and think... Did it come out that way? Or did it rotate to that position after it came to rest in the water? |
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Jan 18, 2023 07:53
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BAD MOTHER staring Samuel L Jackson. Samuel L Jackson gets a sex change opperation and becomes Samantha Jackson. She raises a family and neglects her children and they spend much of their later life in therapy. |
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Jan 19, 2023 11:51
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A character named General Unpleasantness. |
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Jan 19, 2023 12:56
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Hello General Unpleasantness, have you met GENERAL WEBCAM? E: That's how my webcam at work makes itself known. No relation, that I'm aware of |
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Jan 19, 2023 18:14
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Geriatric Park. A group of elderly people are stranded on an island filled with dinosaurs. Hillarious carnarge ensues. Prurient Squid fucked around with this message at 12:28 on Jan 20, 2023 |
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Jan 20, 2023 11:45
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Unlocking 120% of your brain. |
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Jan 20, 2023 13:21
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Prurient Squid posted:Geriatric Park. I figured the elderly people would replace the dinosaurs. "Hold still and he won't notice you're on his lawn, his vision is based on movement" |
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Jan 20, 2023 16:51
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This has Elderly Often Burn Victims energy. |
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Jan 20, 2023 20:50
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Diosaurs < brooms < naptime. Elaborate. |
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Jan 20, 2023 23:56
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I got an idea guys. The elderly people are not a danger per se but when they start ranting it attracts dinosaurs. |
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Jan 21, 2023 12:16
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"Let me show you a little trick I picked up in the marines, kid." *Intentionally slips on some oil to get out of work* |
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Jan 21, 2023 16:08
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Behind door number one, Tyrannosauri. Behind door number two, Esther, and her interminable tales of colostomy, baking, and the previous century. The road behind is cut. Time to choose your fate. |
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Jan 21, 2023 18:57
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Prurient Squid posted:I got an idea guys. Picturing an old, Jewish woman yelling at the dinosaur. "Oh sure, just stomp in here with those dirty feet. It's not like I just cleaned." https://i.imgur.com/9jTkSUL.mp4 |
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Jan 21, 2023 21:58
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rear end, Texas |
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Jan 22, 2023 16:11
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Samuel Johnson said that puns are the lowest form of comedy. That's pretty rich coming from a guy who's last name is a synonym for penis. https://i.imgur.com/9jTkSUL.mp4 |
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Jan 23, 2023 02:18
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Chainsaw Massacre on the Orient Express. |
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Jan 23, 2023 14:51
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Viginti Septem posted:Samuel Johnson said that puns are the lowest form of comedy. I have a hunch Samuel used to mean something dirty too
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Jan 23, 2023 17:17
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felt pretty good when she told me i was the michael jordan of my craft until she clarified that she meant the michael jordan playing baseball of my craft |
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Jan 26, 2023 17:26
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canyoneer posted:felt pretty good when she told me i was the michael jordan of my craft until she clarified that she meant the michael jordan playing baseball of my craft tbh he was reasonable at AA which means he was better at baseball than i am at anything
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Jan 26, 2023 18:25
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Starting a youtube video with an explanation of the concept of an opinion featuring a dictionary definition of what opinion means and the history of opinions. |
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Jan 26, 2023 20:10
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Deci-Maury |
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Jan 27, 2023 01:50
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canyoneer posted:felt pretty good when she told me i was the michael jordan of my craft until she clarified that she meant the michael jordan playing baseball of my craft lol
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Jan 27, 2023 04:20
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title: i wipe my brow content: and i shave my nuts, im breathing in the weed chemicals, Too much is always not enough! |
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Jan 28, 2023 04:04
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if I could then I would I'll go wherever you will go way up high or down low too slow |
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Jan 28, 2023 06:29
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The Terminator comes back in time to save John Conner but ends up teaming up with Beavis and Butthead. |
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Jan 28, 2023 10:57
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And the evil robot usses. |
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Jan 28, 2023 13:34
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Intercom: Next subject, Kowalski, Leon, engineer, waste disposal, file section, new employees, six days. [knock on door] Holden: Come in. Sit down. Leon: Care if I talk? I'm kind of nervous when I make jokes. Holden: Uh, just please don't move. Leon: Oh, sorry. I already had an IQ test this year, I don't think I've ever had one of these- Holden: Reaction time is a factor in this, so please pay attention. Now, answer as quickly as you can. Leon: Sure. Holden: Sixty-nine four twenty at bonerbutt Leon: That's the hotel. Holden: What? Leon: Where I live. Holden: Nice place? Leon: Yeah, sure I guess-- that part of the joke? Holden: No, just warming you up, that's all. Leon: Oh. It's not fancy or anything. Holden: You're on a road, walking along on the shoulder when all of the sudden- Leon: Is this the joke now? Holden: Yes. You're on a road walking along on the shoulder when all of the sudden you look down- Leon: What one? Holden: What? Leon: What road? Holden: It doesn't make any difference what road, it's completely hypothetical. Leon: But how come I'd be there? Holden: Maybe you're fed up, maybe you want to be by yourself, who knows? You look down and you see a cockerel, Leon, it's walking towards you- Leon: Cockerel, what's that? Holden: Know what a chicken is? Leon: Of course. Holden: Same thing. Leon: I've never seen a chicken -- But I understand what you mean. Holden: You look down, you push the chicken in to the road Leon. Leon: Do you make up these jokes, Mr. Holden, or do they write them down for you? Holden: The chicken looks at the road, its feathers baking in the hot sun, trying to cross over but it can't, not without your help, but it's not crossing. Leon: What do you mean it's not crossing? Holden: I mean, it's not not crossing. Why is that Leon? -- They're just jokes, Leon. In answer to your query, they're written down for me. It's a test, designed to provoke an humorous response. -- Shall we continue? Describe in single words, only the large things that come in to your mind about... yo momma. |
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Jan 28, 2023 16:59
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Finger Prince posted:Intercom: Next subject, Kowalski, Leon, engineer, waste disposal, file section, new employees, six days. lol
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Jan 28, 2023 17:49
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*walks into a barbers salon. 2 barbers look u over* u: I know this one. I’ll get a haircut from the one with the worse haircut *gets bad haircut* what the gently caress. I thought u were cutting each others hair barber: no who wants to do that poo poo outside work. I just have bad taste in barbers
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Jan 28, 2023 17:53
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Finger Prince posted:Intercom: Next subject, Kowalski, Leon, engineer, waste disposal, file section, new employees, six days.
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Jan 28, 2023 19:40
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after years of floundering, the dick annihilation factory closes down, and a dick sucking factory opens in its place. some customers did not get the memo and are very confused
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Jan 28, 2023 23:57
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The Holy Vible |
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Jan 29, 2023 00:54
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animal crossing but you're in missouri |
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Jan 29, 2023 21:58
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Harold Fjord posted:The Holy Vible Viblically-Accurate Angels |
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Jan 29, 2023 22:20
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Finger Prince posted:Intercom: Next subject, Kowalski, Leon, engineer, waste disposal, file section, new employees, six days. |
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Jan 31, 2023 03:40
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| # ? May 25, 2024 23:07 |
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A clown whose gimmick is that they are a serious clown and become perfomatively enraged at any sign of silliness. |
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Feb 1, 2023 10:52
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