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artsy fartsy
May 10, 2014

You'll be ahead instead of behind. Hello!
Jesus Christ why are most of the posts on r/BestofRedditorUpdates so loving horrific? Like just sickening stuff, I don't recommend anyone try to get content from there.

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wizardofloneliness
Dec 30, 2008

Mx. posted:

AITA for not letting my sister's boyfriend use hot sauce?

I was all set to label the OP the rear end in a top hat because who really gives a gently caress if he wants to use hot sauce but the reveal of what the dish actually was has made me go back on my judgement. I guess the boyfriend is one of those "Personality: Hot Sauce" type people.

Cowslips Warren
Oct 29, 2005

What use had they for tricks and cunning, living in the enemy's warren and paying his price?

Grimey Drawer
AITA for skipping out on a vacation when they wouldn’t accommodate my son?

quote:

I’m 30f, my husband is 36m, and our kids are 11m, 8m, 6f, and 3m. 8m has physical disability and trouble breathing on occasion.

This Christmas, my husband’s family paid for a trip for themselves and our family a week-long trip to Mexico with them, form Jan. 20-Jan. 28 (including plane days). Obviously our family is forever grateful, we could never afford a trip like this (we get along well day-to-day but we’re not wealthy) and we plan to somehow return the favour in future. On Jan. 12 I called MIL & FIL for some extra info and things last-minute and it was mentioned they weren’t paying for wheelchair accessible things, not the hotel or anything, and the hotel was also far from a hospital. I would have payed for those myself but we can’t afford for the other hotel and things, so I told her me & 8m would have to miss the trip. I apologized again but we couldn’t afford the extra accommodations. I assured them the other kids & husband would still come but they complained and said it was AH of me to back out when they were planning the trip for us. I said I was sorry, and I knew they could refund me & 8m’s tickets, so that’s no issue, but we couldn’t spend that money without going short at home. They called me AH again and later husband said I was being stupid, even if 8m couldn’t come I should have called a babysitter for him for the week. I said no way but am I an AH for how I reacted and not going?

Edit: if it makes anyone feel better (based on comments) yes he’s not going but at least I planned some special things to do while everyone’s in Mexico? I know it’s not ideal but making the best of it



WIBTA for shipping a pack and play to our vacation rental and returning it before we leave?

quote:

We’re going on vacation soon and we have a 5 month old. We’re driving and there’s no way a pack and play is going to fit in our car. I figured we should just have on shipped to our vacation rental or buy one at Walmart when we’re there, and we can just return it before we leave. We’re only staying for three nights so it wouldn’t be used that long. My husband called me shady said that doing that is not right and dishonest, and deliberately making a company lose money is lovely. I honestly could care less about a million dollar corporation losing money. I understand it being lovely if I were to send back a dirty, poo poo and puke stained/smelling pack and play, but I’d make sure it’s clean and wiped down before returning and I will bring his pack and play sheets/pad so he wouldn’t be touching the actual mattress of the pack and play. He said we should just leave it there or throw it out which seems even more rude and wasteful in my opinion. So am I the rear end in a top hat for wanting to return it?




AITA yelling OW when my toddler hurts me?

quote:

My toddler loves to bite and bite hard. She also likes to yank hair, pinch, kick, etc. She is rather strong. Most of the time I don’t respond, but there’s maybe a couple times a week where she bites me by surprise with all her might, and will not let go. She even shakes her head side to side while clamped down on my finger, nose, ear, or whatever else she can chomp on.

It’s the combination of shock and pain that I will shout “OW!” Then, in a regular volume, say “no biting, biting hurts.” I always remove her from my lap or step away from her, and change the subject to distract her. Like give her a teether toy, ask her if she wants a drink of water, whatever.

Anyway, my husband says I’m going to harm her or give her a complex by yelling OW when she is genuinely hurting me. He says I can’t yell at a toddler. He’s seriously pissed because I told him I don’t plan on avoiding my genuine reaction. In my opinion I’m not actually yelling at her. I’m expressing pain. And I never speak to her in a shout at all, unless you count the “ow”. Am I the rear end in a top hat?

OP adds that her toddler is 15 months old. I guess that's toddler?

I must have been lucky, none of the 4 kids I nannied for from 3 months on ever were biters. I was when I was a toddler, per mom; I bit her hand once, because why not? She took my hand and lightly bit the side, not hard at all, but apparently that broke me of biting anyone again. After I finished bawling and crying that Mommy Bite Me, somehow that stuck instead of the "No, ouch!"

Cowslips Warren fucked around with this message at 03:59 on Jan 25, 2023

Pirate Radar
Apr 18, 2008

You're not my Ruthie!
You're not my Debbie!
You're not my Sherry!

wizardofloneliness posted:

I was all set to label the OP the rear end in a top hat because who really gives a gently caress if he wants to use hot sauce but the reveal of what the dish actually was has made me go back on my judgement. I guess the boyfriend is one of those "Personality: Hot Sauce" type people.

From the title I was set to think the boyfriend was the worse one but honestly the way the OP is hung up on not “mixing cuisines” makes it seem like the objection isn’t “no that’ll taste weird” but instead “you can’t break the food rules you will regret this!!!”

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Yeah, I find hot sauce people a little annoying, but in a more general sense I have to side against someone trying to enforce food enjoyment rules. Just let people eat food how they like it! Unless it leads to preferring well done steaks, that poo poo's objectively wrong

pentyne
Nov 7, 2012
If you want to be a foodie rear end in a top hat insisting someone experience the natural purity of taste, you are allowed to go "at least try it first, let me know what you think" but like, barring the door to the fridge and fretting over what noona will think is stupid.

Some people just want a lot of spice because they've deaden their tastebuds, in a similar way smokers would add a ton of salt to their food in order to taste anything.

wizardofloneliness
Dec 30, 2008

Pirate Radar posted:

From the title I was set to think the boyfriend was the worse one but honestly the way the OP is hung up on not “mixing cuisines” makes it seem like the objection isn’t “no that’ll taste weird” but instead “you can’t break the food rules you will regret this!!!”

I'll go with ESH as my final judgement. I had the same reaction to the OP at first, which is why I assumed he was the rear end in a top hat, but seriously who the gently caress puts hot sauce/sriracha on carbonara?! I'm not a food purist, but insisting that carbonara is lacking because it doesn't include hot sauce does make you suck a little bit. I assume this dude adds hot sauce to everything, that's my only explanation. That being said, the OP should've just let him do it because it's not like anyone else has to eat it.

duck trucker
Oct 14, 2017

YOSPOS

I love hot sauce but whenever I'm eating a meal someone cooked for me I just eat it and don't criticize the meal I was given, unless it's something I already dislike or it's absolutely terrible. It might be my Midwest upbringing but I find the idea of whipping out a hot sauce in that type of situation really rude.

Kuros
Sep 13, 2010

Oh look, the consequences of my prior actions are finally catching up to me.
Y'all tellin me you don't have your own hot sauce in your hot sauce holster?

Mx.
Dec 16, 2006

I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!


AITA For punishing my kid for getting in trouble at school?.

quote:

I (52m) have a daughter "Kandi". Kandi is tall for a girl (5'9) and just started her first year of high-school this September.

At her old middle school there was no minimum length for skirts as long as the girls wore pantyhose underneath. Well last week I got a call from the principal that Kandi had worn something inappropriate to school and that I needed to collect her immediately.

When I turned up at the school Kandi was wearing a regular skirt and pantyhose so I asked what the problem was. The principal explained that skirts above the knee weren't allowed and that my daughter's outfit was distracting.

I didn't respond further and just took Kandi home. When we got in the car Kandi started complaining about the principal and how the dress code was unfair for her since she's taller.

I told Kandi that she was grounded for not following the dress code since I had to take time out of my day to go get her and then being embarrassed by the principal. She tried to argue with me but then decided to just ignore me saying that I didn't understand.

Kandi has been ignoring me and even though her grounding ended a week ago she hasn't been out with friends. So I need to know Aita and do I owe Kandi an apology?.

CannonFodder
Jan 26, 2001

Passion’s Wrench

AceClown posted:

as a non-US person what makes LGA worse than JKF? they're like right by each other?
JFK is a larger International airport with more runways and space and priority, and is connected to the subway system. LaGuardia is a smaller domestic airport with only two runways and lower priority, and is not connected to the subway system.

AreWeDrunkYet
Jul 8, 2006

Mx. posted:

AITA For punishing my kid for getting in trouble at school?.

Has anyone enforcing a dress code ever been in the right?

Serephina
Nov 8, 2005

恐竜戦隊
ジュウレンジャー

AreWeDrunkYet posted:

Has anyone enforcing a dress code ever been in the right?

Probably at a wedding w/r/t someone dressing in white.

a strange fowl
Oct 27, 2022

i would never mess with food in the presence of a nonna

Triggs
Nov 23, 2005

Tango Down!

artsy fartsy posted:

Jesus Christ why are most of the posts on r/BestofRedditorUpdates so loving horrific? Like just sickening stuff, I don't recommend anyone try to get content from there.

Reddit in general is weird. I feel like my generation has Reddit and Something Awful. Does the new internet generation have anywhere comparable? Is everyone just going to Reddit?

a strange fowl
Oct 27, 2022

Triggs posted:

Reddit in general is weird. I feel like my generation has Reddit and Something Awful. Does the new internet generation have anywhere comparable? Is everyone just going to Reddit?
tiktok

Midnight Voyager
Jul 2, 2008

Lipstick Apathy

Cowslips Warren posted:


AITA yelling OW when my toddler hurts me?

quote:

This post violates Rule 5: We do not allow posts which concern violent encounters. This includes any mention of violence in any context.

what the gently caress

Triggs
Nov 23, 2005

Tango Down!

Does TikTok have a forum? If so, god bless to those mods.

edogawa rando
Mar 20, 2007

Midnight Voyager posted:

what the gently caress

I don't know if they were born that way, or if it took years of dedicated training, but AITA mods are among the dumbest loving idiot dipshits on the internet. Just the smoothest brains, sizes varying between walnuts and peanuts.

Mx.
Dec 16, 2006

I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!


Midnight Voyager posted:

what the gently caress

lmao

Kurieg
Jul 19, 2012

RIP Lutri: 5/19/20-4/2/20
:blizz::gamefreak:

edogawa rando posted:

I don't know if they were born that way, or if it took years of dedicated training, but AITA mods are among the dumbest loving idiot dipshits on the internet. Just the smoothest brains, sizes varying between walnuts and peanuts.

I imagine they'd ding "AITA for moving through space as a perfectly round frictionless sphere and not interacting with any other object" for some bullshit rule or another.

Evil Willow
Apr 26, 2007
Bored now...
AITA for telling my fiance that he needs to pick a new best man?

quote:

My fiance, Kevin(M28) and I(F30) had initially planned to get married a few years ago but due to the fact that the world was falling apart we postponed it until things calmed down and our family felt safer at a big event. We've now set a date for this coming August and as we get closer more and more thoughts keep coming to me about how it should go. My biggest issue is that Kevin's best man is no longer his best man and is now his best woman. Kevin and Amy(MTF26) have been friends for a little over a decade and when they first met up until two years ago when our wedding was supposed to happen Amy identified as a man. Kevin and Amy have always had a very close almost sibling like relationship, Kevin had been kicked out by his mom at 17 and met Amy at work shortly after. She's been very close with him and he's told me multiple times that she is the closest thing he has to any family.

Initially Amy had planned to not come out to Kevin until after the wedding but after finding out that the wedding was going to be delayed she came out to him. Without consulting me Kevin told her that he was fine with all of that and that if she was at a stage were she'd like to wear a dress when our wedding happened that he would find her a dress that matched the colors he had for his groomsmen. Amy has been medically transitioning for about a year or less now and Kevin told me that we need to find her a dress. I don't have a problem with Amy and I understand how close she is to Kevin but our wedding is largely for my very traditional family. Kevin has often said that this wedding isn't that important to him and that the only reason he's doing it is because it's important to me and my family. I know that my family would have a lot of issue with Amy which Im sure would bring a lot of unwanted or outright rude attention towards her. For this reason I've asked my fiance to choose someone else to be his best man and request that Amy attend as just a guest. This has lead to a large fight between the two of us with Kevin threatening to cancel the wedding if Amy can't be part of the wedding party because he wants someone from his family in it. Im trying to get him to understand the issues this will cause but I'm not sure he gets it. AITA?

Mx.
Dec 16, 2006

I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!


Evil Willow posted:

AITA for telling my fiance that he needs to pick a new best man?
she came out to him as trans. Without consulting me Kevin told her that he was fine with all of that

death to OP

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Evil Willow posted:

AITA for telling my fiance that he needs to pick a new best man?

Acid vat for the fam, also follow them in afterwards just to be sure

Kurieg
Jul 19, 2012

RIP Lutri: 5/19/20-4/2/20
:blizz::gamefreak:
Time for Kevin to start identifying as Single.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised.

Kurieg posted:

I imagine they'd ding "AITA for moving through space as a perfectly round frictionless sphere and not interacting with any other object" for some bullshit rule or another.

The rules of AITA if strictly enforced would pretty much mean you can't post anything there.

Issaries
Sep 15, 2008

"At the end of the day
We are all human beings
My father once told me that
The world has no borders"

Good Surprise twist for that, would be that the fam and OP aren't transphobic at all.
OP just feels threatened by his closeness with her.

But yeah :sever:

Bargearse
Nov 27, 2006

🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

Ghost Leviathan posted:

The rules of AITA if strictly enforced would pretty much mean you can't post anything there.

A net benefit for society imo

The Maroon Hawk
May 10, 2008

wizardofloneliness posted:

I'll go with ESH as my final judgement. I had the same reaction to the OP at first, which is why I assumed he was the rear end in a top hat, but seriously who the gently caress puts hot sauce/sriracha on carbonara?! I'm not a food purist, but insisting that carbonara is lacking because it doesn't include hot sauce does make you suck a little bit. I assume this dude adds hot sauce to everything, that's my only explanation. That being said, the OP should've just let him do it because it's not like anyone else has to eat it.

The only assumption I can draw is that the first time I tried carbonara I thought to myself, “this is breakfast spaghetti”, and maybe this guy thought the same and also compulsively adds hot sauce to everything they eat for breakfast :shrug:

Biplane
Jul 18, 2005

Anyone whining about the sanctity of italian food sucks and is an rear end in a top hat imo

Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Biplane posted:

Anyone whining about the sanctity of italian food sucks and is an rear end in a top hat imo
I dimly recall some study or other that found actual Italian-born people did not give nearly as much of a poo poo about the "sanctity" of it as their descendants with hairs up their rear end about it overseas. Is it edible? Does it taste okay? Good enough!

Evil Willow
Apr 26, 2007
Bored now...
AITA for not wanting to plan dates

quote:

basically my gf and i have been together for 6 months. since the start I must admit, she has planned all the dates. from things like bowling , mini golf or cinema , to at home things like a spa day or cooking together when we cant afford much. at the start of the relationship she suggested maybe we do biweekly date nights and alternate who picks so that we spend quality time together, and if not maybe we could come together and make a date jar. i would always say sure but just never remembered to get to it.

fast forward 4 months she started getting quite irritated that she was planning dates and always being the one to come round mine (I hate her parents so I never go to hers). eventually it started an argument because I once played video games when she came over and she didn't appreciate that and it somehow led to me never planning dates making her feel like we have no quality time. we usually just chill and watch movies or play video games.

i eventually told her we should go no contact for a few days to calm down and when it was over id have a date planned for her. it was going to be cupcake decorating and the day came and we never did it because I forgot and we went to do videogames. at about 8pm she started tearing up and when I asked what was wrong and to talk it out she started full on CRYING and explained, and then chose to go home because she was too upset with me. i was angry that she went home and let her know that. I'm fed up of her asking me to plan dates because shes good at it and I suck at them.

she tells me shes fed up of always picking a place a date and a time and booking it all and that it tires her. however I do so many other good things. we are equal in this relationship. for example she makes me anxiety boxes, writes me love letters, listens to me when sad or does things like breakfast in bed or bake for me. i have held her when shes cried about her strict parents or when her grandad died and I care for her when sick (she does too) or small things like slow dance with her.

i don't understand why that isn't enough and why shes so adamant about dates. she tells me she wants to make memories with me and if that's the case, shouldn't SHE plan it if it bothers her so much? I did get angry at her and tell her I already spoil her and that shes too busy thinking of those fake tiktok relationships and tiktok dates and that she needs to realise that I already do so much for her.

Yep, we're soooooo equal! She does everything, and I hug her now and then!

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



What's wrong with videogames. I can hug her with one arm while playing videogame and that shows her she is just as important

Mx.
Dec 16, 2006

I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!


it's perfectly even, assuming she has 500 grandfathers and they're dropping like flies

Biplane
Jul 18, 2005

Mx. posted:

it's perfectly even, assuming she has 500 grandfathers and they're dropping like flies

Grandfathers Georgina is an outlier and should not have been counted

NeatHeteroDude
Jan 15, 2017

Kuiperdolin posted:

Public school teachers are the first ones to claim no education failure is on their hands, they'd get get all the students squared away if it weren't for ~the system~ hobbling them.

hmmmmmm

Evil Willow posted:

AITA for not wanting to plan dates

Yep, we're soooooo equal! She does everything, and I hug her now and then!

this is a BAD RELATIONSHIP but these people sound like middle schoolers so who can say

Barudak
May 7, 2007

Sriracha tastes gross and sweet to me, but like, if a guest wanted it on their food after trying it how I prepared it, have at it. I want you to eat, then eat more, then as you are begging for mercy, desert will come.

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

I've got a pocket full of cheese🧀, and a garden full of trees🌴.

Evil Willow posted:

AITA for telling my fiance that he needs to pick a new best man?

gently caress the bride here as well as her "traditional family" too.

You'll notice she says that it will bring a lot of unwanted rude attention on "us". Meaning her and her husband to be. No mention of the distress/harrassment that the Best Woman might get.

Also groom says he wants "someone from his family there too". Leading me to believe that OP has stacked the guest list with people from her transphobic "traditional" family at the expense of people who he knows/likes/is related too/wants there. I guarantee Best Woman isn't the first of his side to be whittled off the invite list for reasons.

And no real mention of why the wedding is for her family and not for the couple themselves. Will daddy cut her off if she is "living in sin"? Is this a shotgun wedding? And if they are that traditional(tm) then surely they wont approve of her marrying someone who associates with "one of them", (has she uninvited all the black/brown guests as well?)

FMguru
Sep 10, 2003

peed on;
sexually
Parental estrangement express, all aboooooard!

AITA for telling my son not to come to us when he fails?

quote:

My husband and I (53f, 56m) have two children Zara and Ethan (26f, 19m). Zara is currently in med school and doing very well for herself. Ethan is majoring in robotics and he's been doing quite well so far

Ethan's recently told us that he wants to switch to political science and minor in public policy. Now, I would understand if he was doing very badly or struggling, but he's not. My husband told him he's making a big mistake, not only will he lose credits, he'll have a much harder time finding a high paying, prestigious job. He's adamant on this and said this is what he wants. Eventually I said he can do whatever he wishes, but not to come to us when he fails.

He was upset and I did call him later but he didn't pick up. I sent him a text that I was sorry for saying that but we're just trying to make him see sense. He didn't reply to that either, and clearly he's still mad.

My husband said he's sulking for no reason, but I guess Ethan told Zara what happened because she was going off at me (and my husband) for it.
I told my son not to come to me, and now he's not talking to me! What gives?

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Failed Imagineer
Sep 22, 2018

pentyne posted:

If you want to be a foodie rear end in a top hat insisting someone experience the natural purity of taste, you are allowed to go "at least try it first, let me know what you think" but like, barring the door to the fridge and fretting over what noona will think is stupid.

Some people just want a lot of spice because they've deaden their tastebuds, in a similar way smokers would add a ton of salt to their food in order to taste anything.

You missed the part where she offered both chili oil and chili flakes, but he insisted on Sriracha. Sriracha is literally just spicy ketchup, this is no different than a 2yo (or Trump) demanding to smother everything in ketchup.

I would find it extremely lame if I were the one cooking, but I would let him have his ketchup and then never cook for them again

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