Jokes that are good but you can't be bothered to develop a thread for

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The Voice of Labor

like drop dead fred becoming transparent as the drugs kick in, so too the log out button becomes bigger and bigger until it's the entirety of the forums page

# ? Sep 3, 2023 21:44

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 30, 2024 20:07

Viginti Septem: Oculus Noctuae

deep dish peat moss posted:

Getting mad that you have good meds now and all your self-destructive depression hobbies aren't fun anymore

Hey that's great news, ddpm! 👍

Send some my way

https://i.imgur.com/9jTkSUL.mp4
Thanks to vanisher for the paradise sig!

# ? Sep 3, 2023 22:07

deep dish peat moss

I still haven't been able to get a single call-back for any job application ever since I filed an unpaid wages claim at my last job but maybe soon :unsmith:

# ? Sep 3, 2023 22:23

RavenousScoot

The Voice of Labor posted:

mother fuckin' titty suckin' two balled bitch

"Describe what Marsellus Wallace looks like!"

# ? Sep 7, 2023 21:33

RavenousScoot

to the tune of pretty girl by ween

there's a mother loving titty sucking rubber dick two balled bitch on the town

THANK YOU NESAM :^))
Previous:

code:

https://i.imgur.com/1rh8sdW.mp4 - manifisto
https://i.imgur.com/DeyYjwj.mp4 - vanisher

# ? Sep 8, 2023 04:50

The Voice of Labor

a dog walks up to the bar and says "I'm looking for the mother fuckin' titty suckin' two balled bitch who shot my paw"

# ? Sep 8, 2023 05:10

Bright Bart: False. There is only one electron and it has never stopped

A young German man is working in Nepal where he hears of a reknowned guru residing on a plateau of the nearest mountain.

He prepares to make the journey and sets out. The trek is difficult but he knows that it will be worth it.

Reaching his destination there is a shrivelled woman with graying hair trailing behind her, who looks at our seeker with such cutting perception it sends a shiver. After beckoning to come closer, she sits on the cold rock, opens her withered mouth, and says "Personal advice is free for the first 5 minutes, 1.50 a minute after that. Relationship advice is 2 per minute from the start. So is career advice. Dietary plans are 50 per week and come with 5 minutes of relationship or career advice. Your choice, but you can't mix them.

Cash is king here just like everywhere else because the Square machine has a spotty connection."

Dissapointed, feeling like he'd just been part of a bad joke, our seeker aims higher. Literally. He climbs to a greater peak on the mountain in search of a guru he heard was just a legend. Thrice he nearly falls but he does not give up.

Coming over a ridge he sees an ancient man with an impossible muscular build and a beard even longer than the old woman's hair had been. The guru is already sitting and tells the traveller "I knew you would come", which is taken as a very good sign. "]ersonal, relationship, and career advice is free without limit. Selfies are 15 dollars. Each."

Less than a minute later, the former seeker starts his decent, happy behind words in the certain knowledge he now has just done something that will change his life.

Bright Bart fucked around with this message at 22:48 on Sep 8, 2023

# ? Sep 8, 2023 08:32

Karate Bastard

RavenousScoot posted:

to the tune of pretty girl by ween

there's a mother loving titty sucking rubber dick two balled bitch on the town

I keep hearing this to the tune of she'll be coming 'round the mountains when she comes in my head

# ? Sep 8, 2023 19:35

google THIS

It was a mother loving titty sucking rubber dick two balled bitch

That she wore for the first time today

# ? Sep 8, 2023 19:49

The Voice of Labor

electronic music duo where one dude plays all the keys and writes all the music and does all the programming and lyrics and vocals and the other dude stands around looking mean and nodding his head with his arms crossed over his chest

# ? Sep 8, 2023 23:20

Finger Prince

The Voice of Labor posted:

electronic music duo where one dude plays all the keys and writes all the music and does all the programming and lyrics and vocals and the other dude stands around looking mean and nodding his head with his arms crossed over his chest

So, The Prodigy?

# ? Sep 8, 2023 23:29

RavenousScoot

dine-in soaplands

THANK YOU NESAM :^))
Previous:

code:

https://i.imgur.com/1rh8sdW.mp4 - manifisto
https://i.imgur.com/DeyYjwj.mp4 - vanisher

# ? Sep 9, 2023 17:50

RavenousScoot

snacking breadcrumbs that come in different flavors and you just eat them out of the container with a spoon or pour in your mouth

THANK YOU NESAM :^))
Previous:

code:

https://i.imgur.com/1rh8sdW.mp4 - manifisto
https://i.imgur.com/DeyYjwj.mp4 - vanisher

# ? Sep 9, 2023 18:15

Buttchocks: No, I like my hat, thanks.

Going Clear: Urology and the Prison of Relief

# ? Sep 13, 2023 23:07

The Voice of Labor

down with capitalism

up with capital L ism (the L is love)

# ? Sep 13, 2023 23:27

Viginti Septem: Oculus Noctuae

Lowercaseism

https://i.imgur.com/9jTkSUL.mp4
Thanks to vanisher for the paradise sig!

# ? Sep 14, 2023 05:16

The Voice of Labor

have you tried the pleasantwurst?

# ? Sep 16, 2023 02:40

Trying

The Voice of Labor posted:

contrary to popular stereotypes, Germans actually hate sausage. they think it�s the wurst

# ? Sep 16, 2023 09:19

deep dish peat moss

A group of extremely nice pirates who feel bad every time they plunder so they promise to pay it all back with interest and then they go plunder a richer village and the cycle repeats like some kind of self-inflicted pirate ponzi scheme

# ? Sep 16, 2023 22:21

deep dish peat moss

Bunk beds for giraffes

# ? Sep 16, 2023 22:46

Viginti Septem: Oculus Noctuae

deep dish peat moss posted:

A group of extremely nice pirates who feel bad every time they plunder so they promise to pay it all back with interest and then they go plunder a richer village and the cycle repeats like some kind of self-inflicted pirate ponzi scheme

Don't doxx me

https://i.imgur.com/9jTkSUL.mp4
Thanks to vanisher for the paradise sig!

# ? Sep 16, 2023 23:04

google THIS

deep dish peat moss posted:

A group of extremely nice pirates who feel bad every time they plunder so they promise to pay it all back with interest and then they go plunder a richer village and the cycle repeats like some kind of self-inflicted pirate ponzi scheme

Multi-level marauding

# ? Sep 17, 2023 18:46

The Voice of Labor

you're so spain
you probably think aragon is about you

# ? Sep 18, 2023 05:07

Abugadu: 1st Sgt. Matthews and the men have Procured for me a cummerbund from a traveling gypsy, who screeched Victory shall come at a Terrible price. i am Honored.

deep dish peat moss posted:

A group of extremely nice pirates who feel bad every time they plunder so they promise to pay it all back with interest and then they go plunder a richer village and the cycle repeats like some kind of self-inflicted pirate ponzi scheme

The Pirates of Ponzance

# ? Sep 19, 2023 12:07

Abugadu: 1st Sgt. Matthews and the men have Procured for me a cummerbund from a traveling gypsy, who screeched Victory shall come at a Terrible price. i am Honored.

A vampire who gets narcoleptic whenever he begins to bite into someone

# ? Sep 19, 2023 12:09

Harold Fjord

Abugadu posted:

A vampire who gets narcoleptic whenever he begins to bite into someone

It's a romcom!

She thinks he's her boyfriend. He thinks she'd be a great meal.

Coming this summer.

# ? Sep 19, 2023 13:23

Finger Prince

Yo momma jokes only they're full of praise and positivity.
Yo momma so beautiful, when she walk in a room even the furniture turns to look.

# ? Sep 19, 2023 16:21

WithoutTheFezOn: Oh no

Yo momma so old I told her to act her age and she dropped � what she was doing and paid some bills and checked her investments.

# ? Sep 20, 2023 20:55

The Voice of Labor

yo momma so smart everyone thinks she's crazy

# ? Sep 21, 2023 00:07

The Voice of Labor

the oero, a cookie sandwiched between two layers of sugared lard

# ? Sep 21, 2023 02:47

The Voice of Labor

you momma so fat everyone is a little envious that she can afford to eat so much and work so little

# ? Sep 21, 2023 02:51

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 30, 2024 20:07

RavenousScoot

Abugadu posted:

A vampire who gets narcoleptic whenever he begins to bite into someone

a vampire who gives blood to those in need (their teeth are set to reverse) but they still have to bite and are creepy and sadistically enthusiastic about it like the dentist from little shop of horrors

THANK YOU NESAM :^))
Previous:

code:

https://i.imgur.com/1rh8sdW.mp4 - manifisto
https://i.imgur.com/DeyYjwj.mp4 - vanisher

# ? Sep 21, 2023 02:51

The Something Awful Forums > Main > BYOB: BYOB BYOB BOYB BBOY YOBB YBOB BBYO?? > Jokes that are good but you can't be bothered to develop a thread for

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