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Guy Axlerod posted:I don't recommend anything that contains NPS surveys on principle. E: what a page snipe!
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Oct 6, 2023 22:45
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Volmarias posted:Just remember, anything less than a 10/10 is used as a reason to fire the employee, so only do this if you actually hope that you can contribute to your contact losing their job. I mean, a good NPS score is in the range of "bad scores 20% of the time" so if a place is literally firing people every time a bad score was sent they'd be out of business super fast.
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Oct 6, 2023 22:56
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Lockback posted:I mean, a good NPS score is in the range of "bad scores 20% of the time" so if a place is literally firing people every time a bad score was sent they'd be out of business super fast. I never said they were firing people when it comes in. I'm just saying that it's evidence they'll use later to justify it.
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Oct 6, 2023 23:30
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The ones where they ask "how likely would you be to recommend this payroll software to a friend" are just baffling. 0% likely. I've literally never talked about payroll software with any of my friends.
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Oct 6, 2023 23:46
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I like our internal ones. "How likely would you recommend our service to friends and family" We're an ISP. Nobody has a choice. Our sales strategy is a legalized Monopoly. I will recommend our service to somebody who wants TV, Phone, or internet service at their home because the alternatives are non existent.
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Oct 7, 2023 00:08
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Amazon customer support literally kept me online 2 hours and transferred me to 4 different representatives all of whom were pretty terrible at communicating and did not solve my problem. I still rated them 5 stars because gently caress Amazon, I hope they get promoted and then quit for another job and Amazon is stuck with them for like 90 days or whatever the insane notice period is in India now.
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Oct 7, 2023 05:30
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Just been told that my role has been frozen and that my income is capped below the amount necessary to compensate for the inflation that's occurred over the last year. It's the same thing as my last job! Happy 2 year work anniversary to me! I haven't received a raise since working retail! It's not like I didn't expect something like this could happen, but I'm beginning to depression spiral over the fact I have to jump jobs, again, to get a raise. I'd think that it's because I've been persistent in asking about raises for myself, and for my coworkers, but the manager I spoke to about it agrees and has discussed the same topic with his other reports. The job hunt sucks. Explaining around why I've been jumping jobs sucks. I have relative job security in the meantime (probably), but poo poo. I'm going to have to minimum effort it as stealthily as possible until I get out. I should tap into the networking and use the awards I received during my master's. I feel pre-burnt out on the search. Meanwhile:  I keep clicking the link at the bottom, but they keep asking!
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Oct 8, 2023 08:08
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That sucks. But also nobody should be questioning a jump after two years. This is the way of careers now.
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Oct 8, 2023 16:42
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broken pixel posted:Meanwhile: Unlikely to recommend
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Oct 8, 2023 17:48
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Jordan7hm posted:That sucks. But also nobody should be questioning a jump after two years.
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Oct 8, 2023 18:26
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Deadite posted:My local transit authority has been having a hard time hiring bus drivers, so sometimes busses are just cancelled without notice. So when combined with RTO this leads to me waiting for a bus that doesn’t come, and then waiting 40 minutes for the next one. Do we live in the same city
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Oct 10, 2023 01:44
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Thank ChatGPT for helping me write "this person is worthless and can't even schedule meetings right which is apparently their entire job" in a nice, corporate way for annual peer feedback.
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Oct 11, 2023 22:05
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Fun for the day: Because my department has no eligible delegate for my role, everything I have due in November needs to be done in October before I leave, since I'm out of the country for most of November. This includes people's end-of-year performance evaluations, which will now not include a month of their accomplishments (because they won't have happened by the time I leave). Nope, my manager won't take over writing them. Nope, nobody else is allowed to do my other work while I'm gone (even if they wanted to), because our procedures specify that they have to be done by certain types of roles (departmental responsibilities, etc etc. E.G., QA has to approve specific documents, system owner has to do whatever, site manager has to review / oversee contractor X, etc etc) and I'm the only person in my role. HELL YEAH. I can't wait to see what happens next year when it's time for me to take my (overdue) sabbatical. Sundae fucked around with this message at 22:22 on Oct 11, 2023 |
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Oct 11, 2023 22:19
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Just let your reports write up what they theoretically will have accomplished in November, since they're being shorted a month
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Oct 11, 2023 22:28
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Deadite posted:Just let your reports write up what they theoretically will have accomplished in November, since they're being shorted a month Honestly, do this. It's not like anyone else is going to look anyway.
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Oct 12, 2023 01:13
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Volmarias posted:Honestly, do this. It's not like anyone else is going to look anyway. Over the years Sundae's employers have not been known for acting reasonably with respect to logic, fairness, and material reality.
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Oct 12, 2023 01:26
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This just reminded me that I need to do a year end self review by the end of the week except I've only been here three months and my manager didn't set me any goals. I guess I'll just put "I think I'm doing ok I guess?". Wait have I posted this before? Maybe I did that when it was the mid year reviews which were inexplicably two months ago....
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Oct 12, 2023 09:12
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Biggest Accomplishment of this year: Successfully completed mid-year review.
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Oct 12, 2023 14:18
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Lockback posted:Biggest Accomplishment of this year: Successfully completed mid-year review. "Did not yet get fired" might be a good one.
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Oct 12, 2023 14:22
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Powerful Two-Hander posted:This just reminded me that I need to do a year end self review by the end of the week except I've only been here three months and my manager didn't set me any goals. Goals: don't achieve my goals.
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Oct 12, 2023 14:56
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0/0 goals achieved. NaN isn't allowed so I guess that's 100%.
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Oct 12, 2023 15:46
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Achieving negative goals so that the goal counter maxes out
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Oct 12, 2023 16:28
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Powerful Two-Hander posted:"Did not yet get fired" might be a good one. This is my usual go to. Along with "Haven't hosed up TOO badly". I had to do self evals at my previous company, which was during high pandemic and my wife was in active treatment for breast cancer at the same time. My self eval was something like "I am continuing to fulfill my daily job functions despite everything". Thankfully I had an incredibly understanding boss.
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Oct 12, 2023 16:38
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Oh boy... an all-day team building exercise that features a 1.5 hour block for "Constellation Exercise" and 2 hours for "Enneagrams." What a shame that it's on the first day I'm out on vacation.
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Oct 12, 2023 17:30
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Sundae posted:Oh boy... an all-day team building exercise that features a 1.5 hour block for "Constellation Exercise" and 2 hours for "Enneagrams." I feel a violent illness just reading that.
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Oct 12, 2023 17:32
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If they give me a free lunch they can pay me to tell me I'm the "Dynamic Performer" all they want.
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Oct 12, 2023 17:37
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Lockback posted:If they give me a free lunch they can pay me to tell me I'm the "Dynamic Performer" all they want. Some things are not worth a free lunch. May as well follow it up with a day long hard sell for a time share
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Oct 12, 2023 17:39
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Good-Natured Filth posted:Thank ChatGPT for helping me write "this person is worthless and can't even schedule meetings right which is apparently their entire job" in a nice, corporate way for annual peer feedback. We were joking at work than very soon we’ll need LLM’s for both writing and summarizing professional comms, and lol it’s grim.
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Oct 12, 2023 17:47
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MajorBonnet posted:I feel a violent illness just reading that. Ooh, yeah you should probably be a team player and take the day off so you don't get everyone at the exercise sick. 
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Oct 12, 2023 17:57
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Someone else with my name was hired and now I have to select myself whenever I cc my email on report outs.
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Oct 12, 2023 17:59
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Oh good lord. There is a bald, white Swiss guy presenting right now in this meeting, and his intro slide had a giant stock photo of a black woman next to his name.
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Oct 12, 2023 18:01
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Remember: It takes a community of WE to achieve the data and digital future. Activate your data citizenship.
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Oct 12, 2023 18:12
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Sundae posted:Remember: It takes a community of WE to achieve the data and digital future. Activate your data citizenship. This is like the uncanny valley of English. It's just a litttttle bit off, enough to be unsettling.
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Oct 12, 2023 18:14
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robotic monotone I am a data citizen.
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Oct 12, 2023 19:13
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I kinda didn’t give a gently caress about my performance review. A few things I put in: “I have exceeded all wildest expectations. I have set the bar higher than my predecessors.” “I have done some stuff and things.” “I think I’m doing well at this.” “I got donuts for helping one of our end users, but when he showed up with them I was out that day.” “I work pretty hard I guess.” Still got promoted, lol
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Oct 12, 2023 19:32
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Hotel Kpro posted:“I got donuts for helping one of our end users, but when he showed up with them I was out that day.” Hemingway couldn't pen a more compact tragedy.
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Oct 12, 2023 19:34
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Lockback posted:Hemingway couldn't pen a more compact tragedy. Onboarding zoom canceled; no reschedule Discendo Vox fucked around with this message at 00:27 on Oct 13, 2023 |
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Oct 12, 2023 22:04
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Zarin posted:robotic monotone I am a data citizen. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diaspora_(novel)
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Oct 12, 2023 23:52
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Lockback posted:Hemingway couldn't pen a more compact tragedy. For Goon Free Donuts Never Eaten
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Oct 13, 2023 02:59
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Volmarias posted:For Goon 
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Oct 13, 2023 03:32
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