r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

Khanstant: Apr 5, 2007

Kurieg posted:

Someone in the reddit thread pointed out that all she said was "I found the dress" and the friend jumped immediately to "How dare you go through my closet"

Meaning friend knew exactly where it was the entire time.

Also how naive do you have to be to give someone the keys to your house, leave for a while and ask them to "water your plants" or whatever and think they aren't going through all of your stuff, using your toothbrush, trying out your meds, sleeping in your bed, using your shampoos, wearing your clothes, changing the photos in the house, etc.

# ? Oct 24, 2023 21:34

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# ? May 30, 2024 05:03

mediaphage: Mar 22, 2007; Excuse me, pardon me, sheer perfection coming through

Khanstant posted:

Also how naive do you have to be to give someone the keys to your house, leave for a while and ask them to "water your plants" or whatever and think they aren't going through all of your stuff, using your toothbrush, trying out your meds, sleeping in your bed, using your shampoos, wearing your clothes, changing the photos in the house, etc.

lol uh i actually have a few friends i would absolutely trust not to do this

# ? Oct 24, 2023 21:42

Roobanguy: May 31, 2011

Khanstant posted:

Also how naive do you have to be to give someone the keys to your house, leave for a while and ask them to "water your plants" or whatever and think they aren't going through all of your stuff, using your toothbrush, trying out your meds, sleeping in your bed, using your shampoos, wearing your clothes, changing the photos in the house, etc.

probably not very naive if your friends aren't psychos.

# ? Oct 24, 2023 21:46

Bruceski: Aug 21, 2007; The tools of a hero mean nothing without a solid core.

Khanstant posted:

Also how naive do you have to be to give someone the keys to your house, leave for a while and ask them to "water your plants" or whatever and think they aren't going through all of your stuff, using your toothbrush, trying out your meds, sleeping in your bed, using your shampoos, wearing your clothes, changing the photos in the house, etc.

This is one of those "says a lot more about you than it does us" things.

# ? Oct 24, 2023 21:48

Khanstant: Apr 5, 2007

Hey whatever helps you sleep at night

# ? Oct 24, 2023 21:49

mediaphage: Mar 22, 2007; Excuse me, pardon me, sheer perfection coming through

Khanstant posted:

Hey whatever helps you sleep at night

well, we know how you'd react to housewatching, anyway

# ? Oct 24, 2023 21:51

ilmucche: Mar 16, 2016; What did you say the strategy was?

Khanstant posted:

Also how naive do you have to be to give someone the keys to your house, leave for a while and ask them to "water your plants" or whatever and think they aren't going through all of your stuff, using your toothbrush, trying out your meds, sleeping in your bed, using your shampoos, wearing your clothes, changing the photos in the house, etc.

Do you ever post normal

# ? Oct 24, 2023 21:51

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

Not according to their rapsheet.

# ? Oct 24, 2023 21:55

Upgrade: Jun 19, 2021

??? When you stop into water someone�s plants are you just also showering???? Why????

# ? Oct 24, 2023 21:56

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

Upgrade posted:

??? When you stop into water someone�s plants are you just also showering???? Why????

It's very efficient if the plants are already in the shower

# ? Oct 24, 2023 21:58

ilmucche: Mar 16, 2016; What did you say the strategy was?

Pope Corky the IX posted:

Not according to their rapsheet.

that commuted permaban reason. definitely not clicking on that link :stonk:

# ? Oct 24, 2023 22:03

8one6: May 20, 2012; When in doubt, err on the side of Awesome!

Pomme de Terror posted:

AITA for going through my friend’s closet to find my wedding dress?

The mistake was telling her you found the dress. Either she had legitimately misplaced it, in which case she'd likely have never noticed it was missing, or she was planning to keep it, in which case her response to seeing it gone could have been the stuff of legend.

# ? Oct 24, 2023 22:20

Cowslips Warren: Oct 29, 2005; What use had they for tricks and cunning, living in the enemy's warren and paying his price?; Grimey Drawer

I have house sat for several friends and family, and never once do I go digging for anything. In fact I'm usually kind of leery they have a nanny cam somewhere watching me while I'm trying to make food in the kitchen or something and it looks like I'm probably digging through every drawer, but in reality I'm just trying to find the drat spatula.

AITA for ruining my ex-husbands (m35) life- (f34)

quote:

Aita for ruining my ex-husbands life after he cheated on me? A little background info, me and my ex-husband were highschool sweethearts, practically inseparable ever since we met. He was my first everything and i was his, eventually after college we got married and had 3 kids which are currently 3, 5, and 7 years old. Me and my husband are very busy people so we get a nanny for the kids every day.

My ex-husband recommended her to me, saying that he was the daughter of one of his mothers friends and shes really good with children, later on he started working later, when i was home, so we wouldnt need a nanny all the time and i noticed he was rarely ever in the mood for anything with me, it actually felt like he was sick of me, that night I couldnt sleep, which led to me seeing messages from her to him with a red heart at the end.

At that point i thought i was a fool and after some thinking i took pictures of all of their messages and sent them to his christian family, i knew they wouldnt be ok with it especially when we have young children. The next day he comes to me asking if i knew anything about his family not answering his messages, some even blocked him. I was honest i told him what i did and that i wasnt going to be the fool who stayed with him, i told him we were getting a divorce and im fighting for 100% custody of the children, he wasnt happy about it but i kicked him out and he went to live with the nanny. None of his family is speaking to him atm and the nanny was shamed for being with a married man. Did i go to far?

# ? Oct 24, 2023 22:24

Brawnfire: Jul 13, 2004; 🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

Oh please, they just want applause

# ? Oct 24, 2023 23:03

PizzaProwler: Nov 4, 2009; Or you can see me at The Riviera. Tuesday nights.
Pillowfights with Dominican mothers.

They didn't even bother coming up with a twist or anything *yawn*

# ? Oct 24, 2023 23:56

Khanstant: Apr 5, 2007

Cowslips Warren posted:

I have house sat for several friends and family, and never once do I go digging for anything. In fact I'm usually kind of leery they have a nanny cam somewhere watching me while I'm trying to make food in the kitchen or something and it looks like I'm probably digging through every drawer, but in reality I'm just trying to find the drat spatula.

The last few times I house sat were overnighters to stay with the dogs and it feels way too weird to sleep in their beds. Always just crash on an air mattress or pull out couchbed in living room and let the dogs have the big bed to themselves for once. Dunno why it feels weirder than a hotel room bed that's definitely seen worse than your friends or family. The best part of house sitting are all the streaming networks you don't have at home.

An ex did dog and house-sitting work for a living and the overnight jobs paid better but she was paranoid about nanny cam poo poo too, only took ones from clients with dogs/people she liked and had dogsat for before.

# ? Oct 25, 2023 00:05

Cowslips Warren: Oct 29, 2005; What use had they for tricks and cunning, living in the enemy's warren and paying his price?; Grimey Drawer

Khanstant posted:

The last few times I house sat were overnighters to stay with the dogs and it feels way too weird to sleep in their beds. Always just crash on an air mattress or pull out couchbed in living room and let the dogs have the big bed to themselves for once. Dunno why it feels weirder than a hotel room bed that's definitely seen worse than your friends or family. The best part of house sitting are all the streaming networks you don't have at home.

An ex did dog and house-sitting work for a living and the overnight jobs paid better but she was paranoid about nanny cam poo poo too, only took ones from clients with dogs/people she liked and had dogsat for before.

On the flip side, I was once asked by a friend if I would house sit for her other friend because she would pass on my contact information, but she thankfully warned me in advance that I probably didn't want the job. When I asked why, she said that she had recently dog sat and how sat for her a few weeks ago. And this lady had been robbed months ago and had put in a security system but was extremely paranoid so she had alerts sent to her phone every time a door or window opened or closed anywhere in the house. This also meant there were lots of motion sensors so if you walked from one room to the other it would send another alert and a screenshots to her phone. Add to that she was extremely insistent on the times you would be there, as in the dogs had to be fed their breakfast at 8:00 a.m., not 8:10, not 7:30, 8:00 a.m. on the dot. And my friend knew about all this from experience because when she fed the dogs at 8:10 one day, her friend called her up and yelled at her for breaking the schedule and also for sending so many alerts to her phone because she walked from room to room making sure the dogs hadn't made a mess anywhere.

AITA for spending my kids college funds?

quote:

I (37F) met my husband in college. I never really wanted kids but thought I could compromise on 1, while my husband wanted a huge family, like 5 kids. We compromised on 2 but, surprises happen, and I got pregnant with twins, number 3&4.

I have always been pretty active especially when my husband met me in college I loved to run track and go to the gym regularly as well as eat clean. During my first pregnancy I continued to eat well and excercise as well as after, there was some minor changes in my body but I pretty much bounced back.

After my second pregnancy even though I was still eating healthy and excercising, I had tons of loose skin and my fun bags just about hung to my knees as well as my butt becoming almost inverted. I worked very hard to try and get back in good shape but the loose skin was staying there and my girls never perked back up.

I mentioned to my husband I would like to have surgery to get rid of the loose skin as it would no longer allow me to show my hard progress and I hated the look of it and how I looked, and would also possible like a breast lift. He said it was fine with him but wanted to make sure we were done having kids and I said i was definitely done! Well a bit later my birth control failed me and i was pregnant AGAIN. This time with twins and they took a drastic toll on my body. My legs became very swollen and my body resembled the shape of an oompa loompa.

After the twins were born I proceeded to workout even harder when i had time but it was not easy with 4 kids. I brought up to my husband about the surgery again and he said he didn�t think it was necessary ssecary especially since money is a little tight with 4 kids. I love my kids but I definitely advocate that I need self care too! My husband had started college funds for our kids even though they�re young and we don�t even know if they�ll want to go to college nor will we be able to cover much of their tuition if they do in this economy and with the amount ount of money he was putting away in there he could of definitely let me get my procedures.

I scheduled an appointment with a reputable cosmetic surgeon and transferred my kids college funds to my spending to pay for it in whole. I now look nice and am confident after having a tummy tuck and breast augmentation. My husband on the other hand is calling me selfish and vain, even thought he is the one who wanted so many kids and broke his promise on me getting the surgery earlier.

TLDR: Aita for spending my kids college funds on surgery since they ruined my body?

# ? Oct 25, 2023 00:44

Tobermory: Mar 31, 2011

Cowslips Warren posted:

AITA for spending my kids college funds?

So..... her husband is sabotaging her birth control, isn't he?

# ? Oct 25, 2023 01:10

Cowslips Warren: Oct 29, 2005; What use had they for tricks and cunning, living in the enemy's warren and paying his price?; Grimey Drawer

Tobermory posted:

So..... her husband is sabotaging her birth control, isn't he?

I mean a vasectomy was never mentioned anywhere. I am leaning with him doing something to her poo poo too. And possibly would have again if she hadn't had twins.

# ? Oct 25, 2023 01:19

Khanstant: Apr 5, 2007

Cowslips Warren posted:

On the flip side,

I totally understand paranoia following a break-in, but that system seems like the dogs themselves would inevitably trip the sensors causing a stress cascade of texts and alerts over mundane dog movement.

# ? Oct 25, 2023 01:24

Metaline: Aug 20, 2003

Khanstant posted:

The last few times I house sat were overnighters to stay with the dogs and it feels way too weird to sleep in their beds. Always just crash on an air mattress or pull out couchbed in living room and let the dogs have the big bed to themselves for once. Dunno why it feels weirder than a hotel room bed that's definitely seen worse than your friends or family. The best part of house sitting are all the streaming networks you don't have at home.

An ex did dog and house-sitting work for a living and the overnight jobs paid better but she was paranoid about nanny cam poo poo too, only took ones from clients with dogs/people she liked and had dogsat for before.

drat, I used to catsit and was encouraged to sleep wherever, drink their booze, eat their perishables, have dates over or small parties to enjoy having a bigger space than the 1-bedroom I lived in. I got to live large in houses with awesome cats and got paid to do it! I offered to clean as well for an extra fee so changing the sheets and cleaning their bathrooms made for very happy clients.

# ? Oct 25, 2023 02:32

Total Meatlove: Jan 28, 2007; Rangers died, shoujo Hitler cried ;_;

Cowslips Warren posted:

I mean a vasectomy was never mentioned anywhere. I am leaning with him doing something to her poo poo too. And possibly would have again if she hadn't had twins.

How is that in any way a fair reading of that story?

# ? Oct 25, 2023 02:37

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

AITA for calling out a colleague for eating my sandwich

quote:

On the way to the office, I bought myself a sandwich for lunch, which is in a pack. I ate half of it today for my lunch and saved the other half for my lunch tommorow.

The office is shared with five other people and we share a fridge in the office. One of my colleagues (sasha) had grabbed my sandwich out of the fridge and started eating it! Naturally i called her out and asked her why she was eating my sandwich?

Sasha said that she didn't know it was mine, and apparently the sandwich was waved around in the office asking who's it was but no one responded. I didn't see this happen otherwise i would have said "yea, that's mine."

Now the reason why i think i may be the aita is because Sasha got really upset and looked like she was about to cry. A bit of info on Sasha, she is overly sensitive and will get upset over the smallest things, to the point where others have said they feel like they can't say anything to her because she gets upset so easily! To be fair she did apologise and said she would buy me a new one.

So AITA for the calling out a colleague for eating my sandwich?

quote:

honnestly it's like walking on eggshells around her, she always has to play the victim, she once started crying because someone said they could hear her from outside of the office! she's 58 years old.

# ? Oct 25, 2023 02:58

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

Khanstant posted:

I totally understand paranoia following a break-in, but that system seems like the dogs themselves would inevitably trip the sensors causing a stress cascade of texts and alerts over mundane dog movement.

Motion sensors can be set to ignore movement below a certain height so that dogs aren't constantly triggering them. So if you ever break into a house with pets and motion sensors, just army crawl the TV across the living room floor.

# ? Oct 25, 2023 03:30

Cowslips Warren: Oct 29, 2005; What use had they for tricks and cunning, living in the enemy's warren and paying his price?; Grimey Drawer

Khanstant posted:

I totally understand paranoia following a break-in, but that system seems like the dogs themselves would inevitably trip the sensors causing a stress cascade of texts and alerts over mundane dog movement.

I have no idea how that worked. I did not take the house-dog sitting job, it sounded like way too much work.

AITA for refusing to console my sister after she made a mistake with my best friend?

quote:

My(18m) sister(17f) is in love with my best friend(18m), whose birthday was yesterday. She got this idea that she should give him a 'funny present' that will make him see her sense of humour and say yes when she finally musters up the courage to ask him out.

She got him a comb, which she thought he'd find funny after his hair loss(leukemia patient going through chemotherapy). I did not know that she was give him that until she did it. My friend did not find it funny at all. He didn't cry but was obviously upset. He has refused to answer her texts or calls from this morning and she is freaking out.

I didn't say anything to her since last evening and my mom has been chiding for it. She told me 'silence can be louder than words' and that I was being a bad brother by not helping her while she is distressed. Mom said that my sister made a mistake, yes, but shouldn't be shunned by the two most important boys in her life. Am I wrong for not talking to her?

Ah yes, the famous Prank/Negging of the Magi story.

edit: OP did not know about this gift.

Cowslips Warren fucked around with this message at 03:34 on Oct 25, 2023

# ? Oct 25, 2023 03:32

Tarezax: Sep 12, 2009; MORT cancels dance: interrupted by MORT

Cowslips Warren posted:

I have no idea how that worked. I did not take the house-dog sitting job, it sounded like way too much work.

AITA for refusing to console my sister after she made a mistake with my best friend?

Ah yes, the famous Prank/Negging of the Magi story.

edit: OP did not know about this gift.

Man that comb would take so little effort to spin into a positive gift. Just say that "I know you'll get through this and some day soon you'll be able to use this comb". As a joke gift it sucks, as an aspirational gift it could be genuinely touching.

Of course it's already far too late for her to salvage it like this.

Tarezax fucked around with this message at 03:40 on Oct 25, 2023

# ? Oct 25, 2023 03:37

Cowslips Warren: Oct 29, 2005; What use had they for tricks and cunning, living in the enemy's warren and paying his price?; Grimey Drawer

Tarezax posted:

Man that comb would take so little effort to spin into a positive gift. Just say that "I know you'll get through this and some day soon you'll be able to use this comb". As a joke gift it sucks, as an aspirational gift it could be genuinely touching.

Of course it's already far too late for her to salvage it like this.

apparently sister is doubling down about it being a joke and won't apologize.

one redditor helpfully said she should have bought him a super girly wig, that would have been more funny.

# ? Oct 25, 2023 03:45

Paper Tiger: Jun 17, 2007; 🖨️🐯torn apart by idle hands

If I were bald and got a comb as a gift, I'd just say, "thank you, I'll never part with it"

# ? Oct 25, 2023 03:46

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

Paper Tiger posted:

If I were bald and got a comb as a gift, I'd just say, "thank you, I'll never part with it"

# ? Oct 25, 2023 03:53

well why not: Feb 10, 2009

Paper Tiger posted:

If I were bald and got a comb as a gift, I'd just say, "thank you, I'll never part with it"

# ? Oct 25, 2023 03:54

Quackles: Aug 11, 2018; Pixels of Light.

Paper Tiger posted:

If I were bald and got a comb as a gift, I'd just say, "thank you, I'll never part with it"

# ? Oct 25, 2023 04:00

Captain Hygiene: Sep 17, 2007; You mess with the crabbo...

Paper Tiger posted:

If I were bald and got a comb as a gift, I'd just say, "thank you, I'll never part with it"

YTA

# ? Oct 25, 2023 04:02

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

Paper Tiger posted:

If I were bald and got a comb as a gift, I'd just say, "thank you, I'll never part with it"

# ? Oct 25, 2023 04:09

ApplesandOranges: Jun 22, 2012; Thankee kindly.

Top tier dad joke, everyone go home, it's all combover.

# ? Oct 25, 2023 04:27

Metaline: Aug 20, 2003

Paper Tiger posted:

If I were bald and got a comb as a gift, I'd just say, "thank you, I'll never part with it"

# ? Oct 25, 2023 04:29

well why not: Feb 10, 2009

no one�s gonna toupee that one

# ? Oct 25, 2023 04:35

FMguru: Sep 10, 2003; peed on;
sexually

Tarezax posted:

Man that comb would take so little effort to spin into a positive gift. Just say that "I know you'll get through this and some day soon you'll be able to use this comb". As a joke gift it sucks, as an aspirational gift it could be genuinely touching.

Of course it's already far too late for her to salvage it like this.

It's possibly a funny joke if the recipient is your longtime best friend and the two of you have a habit of cracking on each other.

If the recipient is someone who you are shyly working your way up to asking out for a date then that is, like, the worst possible joke gift.

# ? Oct 25, 2023 05:05

ilmucche: Mar 16, 2016; What did you say the strategy was?

Paper Tiger posted:

If I were bald and got a comb as a gift, I'd just say, "thank you, I'll never part with it"

# ? Oct 25, 2023 05:06

trickybiscuits: Jan 13, 2008; yospos

8one6 posted:

The mistake was telling her you found the dress. Either she had legitimately misplaced it, in which case she'd likely have never noticed it was missing, or she was planning to keep it, in which case her response to seeing it gone could have been the stuff of legend.

Take the dress, don't tell her you found it, then say you are going to contact the police if she doesn't give it back.

Paper Tiger posted:

If I were bald and got a comb as a gift, I'd just say, "thank you, I'll never part with it"

# ? Oct 25, 2023 05:30

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# ? May 30, 2024 05:03

Lemniscate Blue: Apr 21, 2006; Here we go again.

Paper Tiger posted:

If I were bald and got a comb as a gift, I'd just say, "thank you, I'll never part with it"

# ? Oct 25, 2023 05:38

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