Premier League Spooktober: Stockley Park House of Horrors

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Ray Parlour > Premier League Spooktober: Stockley Park House of Horrors

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Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

Wow that City punishment is going to be huge when it's handed down!

# ? Oct 25, 2023 17:14

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# ? Jun 8, 2024 17:26

Jippa: Feb 13, 2009

League 2 do you reckon?

# ? Oct 25, 2023 17:19

Shrapnig: Jan 21, 2005

Jippa posted:

League 2 do you reckon?

Dissolve the club, make all of the players turn out for Maine Road FC for the duration of their contracts.

# ? Oct 25, 2023 17:29

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

Sounds fair to me

# ? Oct 25, 2023 17:32

Scikar: Nov 20, 2005; 5? Seriously?

Cpt. Mahatma Gandhi posted:

Ah yes, the team that barely avoided relegation the past 2 seasons definitely needs to be punished for the clear leg up they got from their egregious financial crimes.

I think the teams that did get relegated would probably have a lot to say about it?

# ? Oct 25, 2023 18:13

FullLeatherJacket: Dec 30, 2004; Chiunque pu� essere Luther Blissett, semplicemente adottando il nome Luther Blissett

Thanks Ants posted:

Wow that City punishment is going to be huge when it's handed down!

Ole will have a parade

i will skip work for the parade and maybe cry a bit

# ? Oct 25, 2023 18:48

Cpt. Mahatma Gandhi: Mar 26, 2005

Jose posted:

so because you're poo poo you should be allowed to do massive financial crimes?

I mean, obviously not, they should be punished for whatever crimes they committed. But the cynic in me can't help but assume Everton will get railroaded so those in authority can say, "See? We DO care about FFP!" while continuing to ignore more blatant breaches of...whatever FFP is supposed to be.

# ? Oct 25, 2023 19:22

Eric the Mauve: May 8, 2012; Making you happy for a buck since 199X

it's supposed to be a way to protect the Big Clubs' position from ever being threatened OP, working as intended

# ? Oct 25, 2023 19:28

Vegetable: Oct 22, 2010

I hope Man City lose all their trophies and also Everton gets relegated

# ? Oct 25, 2023 19:33

Mr Snips: Jan 9, 2009

Vegetable posted:

I hope Man City lose all their trophies and also Everton gets relegated

tbf everton are doing pretty well on the latter part on their own

# ? Oct 25, 2023 19:41

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

Vegetable posted:

I hope Man City lose all their trophies and also Everton gets relegated

This is a very sensible high quality post!

# ? Oct 25, 2023 19:42

Amoeba102: Jan 22, 2010

Blasmeister posted:

They should just immediately swap Everton with Leicester. Its only fair and would make both divisions more interesting.

And keep their current points. LCFC with a casual 13 point lead in the table over Spurs.

# ? Oct 25, 2023 19:48

wooger: Apr 16, 2005; YOU RESENT?

skasion posted:

Not getting relegated to a league with what, 1/10th the revenue? seems like a leg up.

And not thus failing to get their stadium project completed.

And not being liable to immaculately restore the historic dockside area they are building the stadium on for 5x the cost of the stadium if they don�t complete it.

Getting relegated last year would�ve ended the club.

# ? Oct 25, 2023 20:15

kri kri: Jul 18, 2007

https://twitter.com/Carra23/status/1717171341005127688?t=fik40a8zo12JTM5mxbglVA&s=19

agreed carra

# ? Oct 25, 2023 20:31

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

Always said that Jamie Carragher had good football opinions

# ? Oct 25, 2023 20:32

Shrapnig: Jan 21, 2005

Thanks Ants posted:

Always said that Jamie Carragher had good football opinions

Shame about how he sounds when he gives them, but he's bang on there.

# ? Oct 25, 2023 20:37

vyelkin: Jan 2, 2011

Agreed, relegate Man City to the National League North

# ? Oct 25, 2023 21:24

Loving Africa Chaps: Dec 3, 2007; We had not left it yet, but when I would wake in the night, I would lie, listening, homesick for it already.

kri kri posted:

https://twitter.com/Carra23/status/1717171341005127688?t=fik40a8zo12JTM5mxbglVA&s=19

agreed carra

Man city are going to get a 5 figgie fine, if that.

# ? Oct 25, 2023 21:59

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

They'll be made to let Kalvin Phillips leave on a free

# ? Oct 25, 2023 22:00

pik_d: Feb 24, 2006; follow the white dove

TRP Post of the Month October 2021

Thanks Ants posted:

They'll be made to let Kalvin Phillips leave on a free

Would be worse to make City play him

# ? Oct 25, 2023 22:13

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

We're talking about lenient punishments

# ? Oct 25, 2023 23:01

Jose: Jul 24, 2007; Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer

this only happened to everton because putin invaded ukraine and usmanov got sanctioned so evertons money ran out right?

# ? Oct 25, 2023 23:07

Loving Africa Chaps: Dec 3, 2007; We had not left it yet, but when I would wake in the night, I would lie, listening, homesick for it already.

Jose posted:

this only happened to everton because putin invaded ukraine and usmanov got sanctioned so evertons money ran out right?

It's because they spent 500 big ones and got worse op.

# ? Oct 25, 2023 23:20

Jose: Jul 24, 2007; Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer

yeah but it was his 500 big ones and all of that money suddenly vanishing got noticed

funny to think this could all be happening to arsenal instead

# ? Oct 25, 2023 23:28

vyelkin: Jan 2, 2011

The Guardian have a really nice article with people sharing their stories about Bobby Charlton: https://www.theguardian.com/football/2023/oct/25/bobby-charlton-goals-footballer-darts-snooker-gentleman

They're all great but these are a few of my favourites:

quote:

�He was a natural snooker player�
As a 16-year-old trainee press photographer for the Stockport Advertiser, I was sent to Marple Golf Club to photograph a charity golf day cheque presentation. It was May 1976 and Manchester United had just lost to Southampton in the FA Cup final. When I arrived, I was told there was a delay. Two minutes later Bobby Charlton arrived to receive the cheque on behalf of a cancer charity.

We were both waiting and, seeing a snooker room, Bobby said: �Do you fancy a game?� Twenty minutes later, the club captain interrupted and said they �were ready, Mr Charlton�. Bobby replied: �We�ll be there in a couple of minutes. Andy and I are just finishing this frame.� A red-faced captain left us. I couldn�t play snooker, but Bobby Charlton was a natural, explaining his shots as he potted them and giving advice on the one or two shots I had. At the end, he shook hands and said well played. I took the classic local newspaper presentation picture and left.

Walking up the drive to the main road, to catch my bus, a Jaguar drove past me then stopped a few yards ahead and waited. It was Bobby Charlton. He gave me a lift home while chatting about football and the FA Cup final, and asking about my work and family. As a 16-year-old I remember being a bit overawed and excited. As the years have gone on I�ve realised just how gracious and humble he was. He took care to treat me with respect and I was very grateful for his kindness. I came to realise just how important it is to treat everyone equally � a lesson Sir Bobby Charlton embodied every day. Andy Manning

quote:

�It was a small gesture but it had a big impact�
The school where I taught became affiliated with the Manchester United foundation in the mid-2010s. As head of art, I was asked to produce a series of paintings by my GCSE students of United players � not the ideal starting brief for me as I�ve been a Liverpool season ticket holder since 1989. However, it was arranged for Sir Bobby Charlton to visit the school, meet staff and pupils, and see the students� United themed portraits. As a gift for Sir Bobby, I painted a portrait of him in his mid-60s pomp at Old Trafford.

Sir Bobby arrived with his wife Lady Norma and, after he chatted with some students, I presented him with the painting. He seemed genuinely appreciative and humbled. I had a talented but wayward student in the group who was a big United fan. I ushered Sir Bobby over to see his work (a portrait of him) and have a chat. Sir Bobby finished by signing the back of the student�s painting. That student was so full of pride and he really buckled down for the rest of the course. It was a small gesture by Sir Bobby but it had a big impact. Sir Bobby was very humble and he spent far longer than I expected with Lady Norma (who was also lovely) looking at the artwork, and chatting with everyone. I did wear my red Liverpool tie that day and Sir Bobby was very complimentary about J�rgen Klopp while we chatted. Mike Fox

quote:

�What they say about him being a gentleman is true�
I was a cub reporter on the Mexico 86 World Cup. My first assignment was to go to the draw. When it was over and I was leaving the building, I saw Bobby and ran after him. When I caught up with him, I was panting because of the altitude in Mexico City and, being a complete novice, had no idea what to ask him. He looked at me kindly, immediately assessed the situation and asked me: �Would you like to know what I thought about the draw?� What they say about him being a gentleman is absolutely true. Guy Hayward

# ? Oct 26, 2023 01:34

Literally Lewis Hamilton: Feb 22, 2005

quote:

I remember attending a coaching event in 2009 in Israel for 150 children from Arab and Jewish communities. He was dressed in an immaculate cream linen suit and stayed for over an hour in 30C heat giving out signed shirts, talking to kids and meeting the coaches. One of the coaches was running a shooting drill and I vividly remember Sir Bobby asking for a ball to be passed to him and then, to our amazement, he smashed a thunderbolt shot into the top corner of the goal from 25 yards out. Everyone was transfixed by what they had witnessed. It was made even more impressive by the fact that he was 72 years of age and wearing a suit and a pair of brown slip on loafers.

Imagine a 72 year old just effortlessly clowning on you

# ? Oct 26, 2023 12:52

Eric Cantonese: Dec 21, 2004; You should hear my accent.

Jose posted:

this only happened to everton because putin invaded ukraine and usmanov got sanctioned so evertons money ran out right?

They were already in fairly deep trouble before the war in Ukraine made Usmanov persona non grata. Remember that a lot of the alleged misconduct involves improperly using the Covid pandemic to try to get various financial shortfalls within FFP guidelines.

They spent 500 million GBP in transfer fees under Moshiri's ownership, mainly between 2016 and 2020, and very few of those signings paying off either on the pitch or in terms of transfer profit. They've also burned through 5 different managers in that time, all of them needing to get paid off. They had been borrowing against television revenues and property around Goodison for quite a while.

And speaking of Goodison, they had so much bad luck (or otherwise not being able to make the necessary deals) finding a way to get a new stadium that they had to enter into the worst deal possible to get the Bramley Moore Dock stadium built.

Usmanov's misfortunes probably pushed everything to the breaking point, but Everton have been in big financial trouble for a long time and it was never sustainable.

# ? Oct 26, 2023 14:20

sebzilla: Mar 17, 2009; Kid's blasting everything in sight with that new-fangled musket.

Literally Lewis Hamilton posted:

Imagine a 72 year old just effortlessly clowning on you

I can well imagine it, our cricket coach at school was a former county-level player in his 70s and made us look like poo poo regularly

RIP Dave

# ? Oct 26, 2023 14:34

Dudley: Feb 24, 2003; Tasty

vyelkin posted:

Agreed, relegate Man City to the National League North

Relegate them to the National League South, it's the last thing they'll expect.

# ? Oct 26, 2023 16:57

emjayo: Apr 11, 2013

Dudley posted:

Relegate them to the National League South, it's the last thing they'll expect.

would be easier for their fans to get to away games

# ? Oct 26, 2023 17:02

Shrapnig: Jan 21, 2005

What fans?

# ? Oct 26, 2023 17:13

emjayo: Apr 11, 2013

Shrapnig posted:

What fans?

sheikhs flying in from dubai

# ? Oct 26, 2023 17:17

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

Flying in to what?

# ? Oct 26, 2023 17:26

FullLeatherJacket: Dec 30, 2004; Chiunque pu� essere Luther Blissett, semplicemente adottando il nome Luther Blissett

emjayo posted:

would be easier for their fans to get to away games

I'd say they could share the car, but it depends if Liam and Noel are talking to each other this week

# ? Oct 26, 2023 18:05

Butterfly Valley: Apr 19, 2007; I am a spectacularly bad poster and everyone in the Schadenfreude thread hates my guts.

Are you having fun boys?

# ? Oct 26, 2023 18:37

FullLeatherJacket: Dec 30, 2004; Chiunque pu� essere Luther Blissett, semplicemente adottando il nome Luther Blissett

every day I dream of even lower-hanging fruit

# ? Oct 26, 2023 18:40

Dudley: Feb 24, 2003; Tasty

FullLeatherJacket posted:

every day I dream of even lower-hanging fruit

The march of time makes that a reality as you hit middle age.

# ? Oct 26, 2023 21:41

harperdc: Jul 24, 2007

Literally Lewis Hamilton posted:

Imagine a 72 year old just effortlessly clowning on you

It�s not like he did it in five-a-side, just stepping in to a shooting drill to remind the young�ins that form is temporary but class is permanent.

Scoring a screamer in a suit and loafers, unreal.

# ? Oct 27, 2023 02:44

The Finn: Aug 27, 2004; إنه أصلع في الأسفل، كما تعلم

Luis Diaz's parents have been kidnapped in Colombia and are currently being held for ransom. loving hell

# ? Oct 29, 2023 03:12

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# ? Jun 8, 2024 17:26

Akbar: Nov 22, 2004; Hubba-
Hubba.

The Finn posted:

Luis Diaz's parents have been kidnapped in Colombia and are currently being held for ransom. loving hell

Jesus Christ that's horrible

# ? Oct 29, 2023 05:24

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Ray Parlour > Premier League Spooktober: Stockley Park House of Horrors

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