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Jim starts loudly clicking his pen, and every time he clicks, Dwight grows a little more swollen and lighter. At the end of the day Dwight is a swollen mass of flesh sticking to the ceiling of the office. "I knew I had you figured for a Balloon Boy, Dwight!", Jim quips happily.
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Nov 16, 2023 18:27
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| # ? May 29, 2024 15:27 |
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Dolphin Jim starts loudly clicking his sonar every time Dolphin Dwight tries to concentrate.
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Nov 16, 2023 20:57
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Jim shows up uninvited to Dwight’s Thanksgiving and eats all the “good bits” of dinner.
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Nov 16, 2023 21:08
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Jim uninvites himself from Dwight's Thanksgiving dinner just so he can show up uninvited.
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Nov 16, 2023 21:13
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Every time Dwight takes a swim in the ocean Jim convinces his best friend Steve the sperm whale to click his 230db sonar at Dwight.
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Nov 16, 2023 21:23
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Jim, uninvited, comes over to Dwight’s place early on Thanksgiving morning to help “stuff the turkey”. Later on, just as Dwight is about to carve the bird, three Tiny Jims emerge from the cavity. They immediately imprint on Dwight, calling him Daddy in their high pitched cries.
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Nov 16, 2023 21:43
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Jim and his best friend Steve the sperm whale go on an adventure together. The adventure in question is to sink the cruise ship Dwight and Angela celebrate their anniversary on. Jim mugs the camera.
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Nov 16, 2023 21:51
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Jim shows up uninvited to Dwight’s Thanksgiving dinner and brings with him the cooked carcass of Steve the Sperm Whale. Jim pours overflowing gravy boats of ambergris all over the mashed potatoes with a demented leering grin plastered on his face.
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Nov 16, 2023 22:24
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Jon Krasinski pranks Rainn Wilson by hiring writers from the later seasons of Family Matters. Every future season of The Office now revolves around Jim and Dwight ending up in fantastic situations (Jim invents a shrinking potion, Jim invents a time machine, Jim and Dwight appear on American Gladiators, etc.) Toby is sent to his office in Episode 1 and never seen again. Gatto Grigio fucked around with this message at 07:03 on Nov 17, 2023 |
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Nov 17, 2023 06:54
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Kracsynzki charger from A Quiet Place shows up instead of Jim and he's really timid and scared when people talk
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Nov 17, 2023 07:14
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Jim starts loudly clicking his pen, and every time he clicks, he fearfully looks around. Eventually Dwight realizes that he’s trying to summon the monsters from A Quiet Place. Instead, Pam saunters over, sits down in Jim’s lap, and kisses him for “successfully pulling off a really good prank,” although she then points out that it wasn’t “le epic win” because Jim referenced a movie for adults instead of a classic Disney princess movie.
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Nov 17, 2023 11:52
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Jim starts loudly clicking his pen to the tune of How Far I'll Go from the hit Disney movie Moana. Even though there are no lyrics, Dwight can hear the part where the song rhymes "go" with "go" and winces every time.
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Nov 17, 2023 13:31
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Jim starts selling bootleg merchandise which he claims is "endorsed by Schrute Farms". Dwight is unaware of this until a faulty beet-shaped nightlight catches fire and gives a small child 3rd degree burns. Dwight meets the injured child at the hospital as part of his normal volunteer work, only for the young boy to start crying and say that he's "sorry he let down Mr. Schrute". Dwight asks what he means by that and the boy reveals a horrifying truth - Jim has convinced the children of Scranton that they need to keep buying his shoddy merchandise or else Dwight will "kill himself in front of Santa Claus". An angry Dwight rushes over to Jim's house, only to find him using an unusually loud leaf blower in the yard. "SORRY DWIGHT! YOU'LL HAVE TO COME BACK LATER! I'M BLOWING LEAVES!" Jim then "jokingly" turns the leaf blower on Dwight, chuckles, and then returns to his leaves. Dwight, perhaps angrier than he's ever been, grabs the leaf blower out of Jim's hand and smashes it in half over his knee. He tells Jim that he games stop now, no more selling bootleg merchandise and no more manipulating children to steal their money. Jim chuckles. "Whatever do you mean, Dwight? Kids love you. They love to slurp up your slop, no matter how cheap it is! I just stepped in and took advantage, if I didn't, someone else would. So maybe stop blaming me and look at yourself, you loving cow. Now get out of here, I have leaves to rake. Since you, you know, broke my loving leaf blower in your impotent rage." Dwight is about to walk away when he takes another look at Jim's face. Jim's stupid loving grinning face. Jim, who never had an ounce of difficulty in his life that he didn't cause himself. Jim, who has a seemingly endless supply of second chances and money to fund his frivolous pranks and his cruel notions of fun. And, in that moment, Dwight snaps. He reaches out and lifts Jim off the ground by his shirt collar, then tosses him into the pile of leaves he's just started raking. "Jesus, Dwight, calm the -" Dwight then leaps onto Jim and begins laying powerful punches directly into his face, shattering his nose and knocking several teeth loose. Dwight then picks up by the throat with one hand and hits a series of devastating knee strikes into Jim's stomach. After three blows, Jim starts coughing up blood. "ENOUGH! Cut it off!" The video screen fades in the darkened meeting room. Oscar, dressed in a fancy suit, holds the remote control that he used to shut it off. He has a grim look on his face. "That's what happens without an Oscar around," he says to a room full of frightened looking Oscars. One of the Oscars is a fish man. "We keep things from going too far." "Is this really relevant for all of us?" asks an Oscar with robotic limbs. "My Jim is basically a big toaster. I don't think it's such a big deal if he got smashed up or whatever." "That's not the point," the lead Oscar adds, "the point is that we're very important to the order of things. We have to remind them that we sell paper, for God's sake." "Not me!" happily adds a pile of papers named Oscar, "we sell humans! Uh, sorry if that bothers you guys. I'm still dealing with the concept of paper being a commodity for you, too."
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Nov 17, 2023 18:23
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Dwight walks past the supply closet and hears Jim inside. "Ice cream, yum! Ice cream, yum! Ice cream, yum!" Dwight realizes that Jim, desperate for money, must be live streaming as an NPC on TikTok. Feeling terrible for his coworker, he slips some money in an envelope and places it in Jim's desk with a note saying "No questions asked, let me know if you need more." The next day comes and Dwight, again, hears Jim repeating himself in the closet. Dwight slips him some more money. This pattern repeats for a week and Dwight, now worried Jim is in terrible financial straits, opens the supply closet door. Jim is sitting, cross-legged and with a bulging stomach, on the floor with a giant tub of ice cream in front of him. His clothes are covered with melted ice cream and his eyes dart around the room crazily. There are no cameras. He's just shoving spoonful after spoonful of ice cream in his face. "Dwight! Wanna join the ice cream party? Since you kept giving me money I could keep buying the top shelf stuff, it's great!" Jim sticks his filthy hand in the ice cream and scoops out a fistful, then extends a quivering hand to Dwight. "Ice cream, yum! Ice cream, yum! Ice cream, yum!" Jim mugs for the camera.
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Nov 17, 2023 19:05
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Jim keeps posting “race realist” crime statistic report charts to the office Yammer page, earning him a promotion from CEO Elon Musk. He uses his bonus to buy more ice cream (vanilla).
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Nov 17, 2023 19:43
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Dwight sees a shooting star and makes a wish, but the star soon reveals itself to be a meteor that crashes in the woods behind the farm. Dwight rushes out to go see it but, when he arrives, it's surrounded by 5 glowing figures that look like Jim. One of the figures looks at Dwight and points a finger then lets out an inhuman wail. Soon the figures are enveloped in light and disappear, leaving only a crater where the meteor had once fallen.
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Nov 17, 2023 19:47
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Jim starts loudly clicking his pen in Morse Code. Over the course of the next several hours, Jim clicks out the entire script of Disney's Frozen II, the box office smash hit about a magic princess with ice powers who saves her kingdom from enraged elemental spirits. Pam listens to the clicks, her eyes shining with tears at the part where Olaf, a cartoon snowman, fades away when Princess Elsa loses her powers. A scene that echoes a scene from an earlier Disney release, Disney's Avengers: Infinity War where the superhero Spider Man fades away in front of his mentor, another superhero named "Iron man." Dwight is—mercifully—deaf thanks to Jim's prank from that morning where Jim ran up behind Dwight and clapped his cupped palms hard over both of Dwight's ears, bursting Dwight's eardrums in a scene that recalls Kurt Vonnegut's 1973 novel "Breakfast of Champions." Pam rushes over and gives Jim nose kisses to express her approval of Jim's Disney Princess themed prank. Jim mugs for the camera and waggles his eyebrows.
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Nov 17, 2023 19:48
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Jim and Pam have been arguing for over two hours about whether to spend their Thanksgiving holiday at Disney World or Universal Studios Orlando (home of several Minions rides). Dwight feels bad because he’s been spending most of the time hoping they escalate the dispute until the marriage ends. Ultimately, however, they decide to just take another week off so they can do both (Pam suggests just opening up another credit card).
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Nov 17, 2023 20:25
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Jim - always up to date with new pop culture phenomena - quibs "Winter is coming!" as he dumps 10 cubic feet of snow onto Dwight's Trans-Am.
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Nov 17, 2023 20:29
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Jim licks Dwight’s earlobe and calls him a prude and a homophobe for objecting to his constant sexual harassment.
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Nov 17, 2023 20:46
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Jim starts loudly clicking his pen in Morse Code. Over the course of the next several hours, Jim clicks out the entire script of Disney's Frozen II, the box office smash hit about a magic princess with ice powers who saves her kingdom from enraged elemental spirits. As the clicks are transmitted through Dwight's phone, barely registering on the receiver's mic, a crack team of heavily armed grizzled commando veterans bust through the windows, elevators and doors of the office, sending shards of glass and metal, and wood splinters every direction. Everyone but Jim barely registers the chaos when a hail of bullets is fired towards Dwight, hitting him in every direction and twisting his limp body every other way. As the smoke settles, the Disney Trademark and Copyright Police :tm: hands Jim an envelope with a smiling Mickey, thanking him for the tip.
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Nov 17, 2023 20:52
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Jim starts loudly clicking his pen in Morse Code, prompting Dwight to wonder where Jim found a ballpoint pen with two different click intervals, as Morse code is actually not possible to express in simple clicks or taps. When Jim gets up from his chair to use the bathroom, Dwight pounces on the pen and tries to replicate the clicking action, but is unable. The pen will only click normally no matter what Dwight does. Dwight will not give Jim the satisfaction of asking Jim for the secret, and so spends the rest of the day frustrated by the mystery. Jim, who does not know Morse Code or even own a pen, mugs at the camera.
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Nov 17, 2023 22:00
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Jim - always up to date with new pop culture phenomena - quips "You are the weakest link!" as he dumps 10 cubic feet of metal chain links onto Dwight's Trans-Am.
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Nov 18, 2023 00:09
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Jim - always up to date with the latest pop culture trends - sprays Dwight in the face with his fountain pen, the traces of which stain “I stink” written in Morse code in blue ink across his forehead.
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Nov 18, 2023 00:12
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Jim does the ice bucket challenge on Dwight’s desk, ruining his computer.
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Nov 18, 2023 01:40
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Jim dresses Dwight and himself as Bobby Riggs and Billy Jean King, so as to remain topical and current.
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Nov 18, 2023 01:52
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Jim starts loudly clicking his pen while wearing a fully functional Space Marine Ultramarines Powered Armor suit. Dwight is powerless to stop Jim from clicking the pen as much as Jim wants.
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Nov 18, 2023 04:42
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https://youtube.com/shorts/sZ7bYXgGcM8?si=6WUydzd1IFFI0KxI
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Nov 18, 2023 15:59
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Dwight wakes up horrified to discover Jim is bench-pressing him.
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Nov 18, 2023 16:09
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Dwight wins Dunder Mifflin’s “Salesman of the Year” award for the eleventh time, and while he’s starting to give his award speech, Jim runs up behind him and tries to take credit for Dwight winning. “Well, I do give partial credit to Jim,” says Dwight, “As the r constant, ceaseless pranking has helped develop me into a fully formed human being. He also came up with my favorite line, which was ‘I’m going to break into your house in the middle of the night and kill you.’”
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Nov 18, 2023 16:16
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Jim writes a light novel titled "All You Need is Prank" which is later adapted to a movie which is released in theaters as "Edge of Prankmorrow" but changed to "Live, Prank, Repeat" for the home video release. The movie barely ripples the skein of the cultural consciousness, but it's enough to send Dwight into horrifying PTSD-induced anxiety attacks because the plot, centered around a beet farmer trapped in a repeating time loop of cruel pranks perpetrated by grinning, skeletal aliens basically describes Dwight's everyday life. Jim mugs the camera as Dwight rocks back and forth giving himself a butterfly hug in the background.
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Nov 18, 2023 17:34
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Jim learns his pranking is part of a long-running campaign against Dwight being funded by the US Government in hopes that 'whatever doesn't kill Dwight will only make him stronger." Soon Dwight will be expected to fight for the fate of humanity in a galactic martial arts competition. Jim, saddened by the burden Dwight will be forced to shoulder, kills Dwight.
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Nov 18, 2023 18:51
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Jim starts loudly stroking his penis in Morse Code. Dwight is forbidden to interfere because of the Paladin Oath Jim tricked Dwight into swearing the previous day. ... / .._ / _._. / _._ / .. / _ / _... / ._ / ._.. / ._.. / _ _ _ / _ _ _ / _. / _... / _ _ _ / _._ _ / strokes Jim, smirking.
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Nov 18, 2023 19:50
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.--- .. -- / . -. -.-. .- ... . ... / -.. .-- .. --. .... - .----. ... / ... - .- .--. .-.. . .-. / .. -. / .--- . .-.. .-.. --- .
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Nov 18, 2023 23:35
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Always on top of the absolute latest technological and social developments, Jim sends a telegraph in Morse code to the Pinkertons, identifying Dwight Shrute as a labor agitator.
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Nov 19, 2023 00:16
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Due to imminent bankruptcy and foreclosure of his house Jim is forced to cut back spending. The only thing he can afford prank-wise is openly mocking Dwight and his hobbies. On Monday Jim replaces all office plants with beets fertilized with Dwight's famous horse manure. On Tuesday he switches Dwight's karate classes to one for fourth graders. On Wednesday he replaces Dwight's emergency survival kit with a dead rat. On Thursday he changes Dwight's desktop background to one with Jim dressed up as Captain Apollo. On Friday Jim comes into the office with a recorder intending to ruin Dwight's rendition of the national anthem. To everyone's surprise Jim plays decently. More than that: better than everyone and everything that Dwight has ever heard. Tears form in his eyes as he listens to Jim's angelic performance. Dwight feels elated, as if everyone can be saved. Even Jim. Jim then grabs a nearby hammer and smashes his left hand into pieces all but ensuring he can never play again. As he is wheeled into the ambulance Jim mugs the camera as Dwight despairs in the background.
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Nov 19, 2023 21:02
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As part of his community service, Jim is assigned to the Big Prankers/Big Pammers program where he's to be a role model for a troubled young prankster. He comes in after his first volunteering session and breaks down into tears that his Little Pranker won't listen to him! Too focused on SWATTING and DOXXING to do REAL hardcore pranks! He really tore into that little bastard before leaving for the day, so at least Jim felt confident that, without question, that kid is going to sit and really feel the sting of Jim's insults and criticisms. Anyway, day was over, and with any luck, after his tirade, the school would just tell him not to come back anymore and he could get out of this community service. At the very least, hassling Pam might give him back his smile... Instead he finds Pam mindless doodling. Eager to get her attention, he grabs the clipboard from her and is about to throw it when he's moved by the skill of her art. "I... I never knew you were so talented, Pam." Jim looks deep into the image that seems to tear into his very soul, though obscured by thick pencil lines she'd been swirling all about the page. He wondered if this juxtaposition was somehow indicative of Pam's personal state. An artistic soul that is burdened by his chaotic pranking madness. The moment of insight was like a firecracker. Explosive and short lived. "Not mine, Jim. A 4th grader I was Big Pamming for drew that. A fourth grader, Jim." Pam pushed her pencil into her hand, focusing on the pain. "I was supposed to be HER mentor and do you know what I taught HER today? I taught her that I didn't know what 1-point perspective was. Did you know what it was? I didn't." "I know what my perspective is! My LIttle Pranker is an rear end in a top hat! I tried to show him the ropes and you know what he did? He made fun of me on Youtube! I told him that's bullshit prankery and put a kick me sign on his back. That oughta show that lit---" At that moment, a SWAT team bursts into the Halpert estate. Across town, Dwight reviews his charitable donations for the upcoming year and earmarks an additional $100K to Big Prankers/Big Pammers. Dwight mugs to the camera.
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Nov 20, 2023 01:48
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Jim puts a "kick me" sign on Dwight's back, then kicks Dwight in the balls from behind.
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Nov 20, 2023 04:09
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Jim comes into the office wearing Mickey Mouse ears and bedazzled with pins indicating different theme park rides he’s been on, hand in hand with a beaming Pam. She butterfly kisses him and skips over to the reception desk, where she surreptitiously sips Hakuna Matatta Cocktail out of a cup in the shape of Olaf the snowman. Because he’s spent the equivalent of three years of the average American family’s household income on a five day, four night stay in the Epcot Center, Jim has to skip lunch, and his pranking by fund is empty, so he spends the day working and does not play any fun pranks on Dwight. As the end of the day nears, Pam walks by with a “seductive” sway to her hips, and promises Jim that they’ll spend all night up in the bedroom, where she’ll sketch Jim as Pinocchio before she “goes Tinkerbell” on him. With a pale, fearful smile, Jim faintly accepts. As soon as she leaves, Jim grabs Dwight by the collar. “You gotta help me out here, Balloon Buddy. I can’t take another day of this poo poo. It’s killing me. Help me get outta this marriage. I can move back to my basement and stop spending all my time planning my next trip to Disney World. I can’t do it anymore.” Dwight seems puzzled. “What does this have to do with me?” Jim glances around. “I got back with Pam as a prank on you. But it’s eating me alive; I didn’t realize how depraved these Disney people were. It’s sicker than anything I’ve ever done. Just tell me you’ve been properly pranked by this one, and I can split away from old Minney there and get back like we used to be.” Dwight looks deliberately at Jim for a moment, then says flatly, with no trace of emotion, “I’m very glad you are back with Pam. It has not negatively affected me and your actions thus far would not constitute a ‘prank’ as understood in any definition. Congratulations on your marital bliss, I hope you continue to enjoy your time together.” Jim, fear dawning in his eyes, tries to plead his case with Dwight, begging that Dwight just acted slightly annoyed so Jim can “finish” this prank and be free, but Pam comes by and drags him screaming out of the office for a night of “Descendants-and-Debauchery.” Dwight mugs the camera.
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Nov 20, 2023 04:30
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| # ? May 29, 2024 15:27 |
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Jim puts a beet on his desk and refuses to eat it, forcing Dwight to watch its slow decay each day.
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Nov 20, 2023 07:58
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