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former glory
Jul 11, 2011

:alonso: There's going to be a documentary out on Netflix this year about the entire Neimann cheating event and chess cheating in general per the chess.com CEO.

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Perry Mason Jar
Feb 24, 2006

"Della? Take a lid"
Little fuel will put that fire right out. This is all healthy for the game of chess, and necessary.

Ben Nerevarine
Apr 14, 2006
I’m vibrating with anticipation

Obfuscation
Jan 1, 2008
Good luck to you, I know you believe in hell
I hope they spend several episodes debunking the stockfish butt plug, they can bring in an expert to explain to the viewers what a "twitch chat" is

Rooster Brooster
Mar 30, 2001

Maybe it doesn't really matter anymore.
i am most definitely a stockfish butt plug truther

Arrhythmia
Jul 22, 2011
Niemann is a twerp.

Bruce Hussein Daddy
Dec 26, 2005

I testify that there is none worthy of worship except God and I testify that Muhammad is the Messenger of God
Daily tournament. 3 Day time control. My opponent is rated ~1000. Move 13 :psyduck:

Salt Fish
Sep 11, 2003

Cybernetic Crumb
Well at least you know they're not cheating.

Leperflesh
May 17, 2007

this is what the game actually looks like to your opponent

Arrhythmia
Jul 22, 2011

Leperflesh posted:

this is what the game actually looks like to your opponent



There's a giant red circle around the black efile pawn labelled "ONLY DEFENDED BY THE QUEEN"

Leperflesh
May 17, 2007

I think opponent is thinking
1. "I SHOULD CASTLE"
2. "Why won't it let me?" ..."oh, the queen is attacking F1"
3. "I CAN BLOCK THE QUEEN"
...
4. "checkmate? what... ohhhhh"

Huxley
Oct 10, 2012



Grimey Drawer
My guess is, "see if he'll trade ... Queen takes, King takes, Re1 and I can run the King back to the corner and regroup ... "

AnoHito
May 8, 2014

My bet is on them seeing a phantom knight still on g1

Bruce Hussein Daddy
Dec 26, 2005

I testify that there is none worthy of worship except God and I testify that Muhammad is the Messenger of God

Salt Fish posted:

Well at least you know they're not cheating.

This was literally my first thought lmao.

Salt Fish
Sep 11, 2003

Cybernetic Crumb
Here's a mate in 2 from the book "Chess":

silvergoose
Mar 18, 2006

IT IS SAID THE TEARS OF THE BWEENIX CAN HEAL ALL WOUNDS




Okay that ended up being pretty fun.

Bh1, getting the bishop out of the way so the queen can get to the second rank for a check, and unlocking the knight as a movable square

regulargonzalez
Aug 18, 2006
UNGH LET ME LICK THOSE BOOTS DADDY HULU ;-* ;-* ;-* YES YES GIVE ME ALL THE CORPORATE CUMMIES :shepspends: :shepspends: :shepspends: ADBLOCK USERS DESERVE THE DEATH PENALTY, DON'T THEY DADDY?
WHEN THE RICH GET RICHER I GET HORNIER :a2m::a2m::a2m::a2m:

silvergoose posted:

Okay that ended up being pretty fun.

Bh1, getting the bishop out of the way so the queen can get to the second rank for a check, and unlocking the knight as a movable square

Wait, isn't it c4, Kxa2, c5#

E: guess it works out the same but my way is cuter imo

regulargonzalez fucked around with this message at 02:19 on Feb 12, 2024

Arrhythmia
Jul 22, 2011

regulargonzalez posted:

Wait, isn't it c4, Kxa2, c5#

E: guess it works out the same but my way is cuter imo

2. ... Kb2

regulargonzalez
Aug 18, 2006
UNGH LET ME LICK THOSE BOOTS DADDY HULU ;-* ;-* ;-* YES YES GIVE ME ALL THE CORPORATE CUMMIES :shepspends: :shepspends: :shepspends: ADBLOCK USERS DESERVE THE DEATH PENALTY, DON'T THEY DADDY?
WHEN THE RICH GET RICHER I GET HORNIER :a2m::a2m::a2m::a2m:

Arrhythmia posted:

2. ... Kb2

Oh I'm a dumb

Salt Fish
Sep 11, 2003

Cybernetic Crumb
That's what makes it fun. There are multiple mate in 3 patterns that are interesting but don't work for the same reason they fail to cover the b2 square. Other examples of this: Ka5, Ka3 (planning Qc4/Qa3) and Rd2, Kc2 (planning Qa4). I didn't see the possibility of c4 and c5 which is a good idea for a puzzle solution.

khazar sansculotte
May 14, 2004

I, a genius, immediately found stalemate in 1 with Qh6. :colbert:

Today I blew a win with this ??? move:



But then my opponent gracefully offered a draw a few moves later:

cock hero flux
Apr 17, 2011





most satisfying move of my life

Olothreutes
Mar 31, 2007

Won a game earlier today and hit the game review to find I missed mate in 1 on move 5 or something. Whoops.

Leperflesh
May 17, 2007

Salt Fish posted:

Here's a mate in 2 from the book "Chess":



It took me a frustratingly long time to realize that it had to be white to move here because if it's black to move it's already a stalemate, lol

Arrhythmia
Jul 22, 2011

Leperflesh posted:

It took me a frustratingly long time to realize that it had to be white to move here because if it's black to move it's already a stalemate, lol

Bro what did you think Black was going to mate with

Leperflesh
May 17, 2007

it says a mate in two, obviously for white, but that doesn't mean - at least in my brain - that it's white's turn
I guess it does though?

silvergoose
Mar 18, 2006

IT IS SAID THE TEARS OF THE BWEENIX CAN HEAL ALL WOUNDS




It does, yeah.

Leperflesh
May 17, 2007

okay

AnoHito
May 8, 2014

If I was allowed to choose the moves for both sides, these puzzles would be a whole lot easier

Mikojan
May 12, 2010

cock hero flux posted:



most satisfying move of my life

King got lost looking for the restrooms or something?

cock hero flux
Apr 17, 2011



Mikojan posted:

King got lost looking for the restrooms or something?

i was able to force him into a kingwalk all the way across the board after winning his queen

it only involved me missing one Mate in 1 on the way there, too, lol. god bless him for not resigning

Bruce Hussein Daddy
Dec 26, 2005

I testify that there is none worthy of worship except God and I testify that Muhammad is the Messenger of God
Good one from reddit. White to mate in 2

mfcrocker
Jan 31, 2004



Hot Rope Guy
drat, that really is a good one.

silvergoose
Mar 18, 2006

IT IS SAID THE TEARS OF THE BWEENIX CAN HEAL ALL WOUNDS




I saw it very quickly, but it's fun!

fisting by many
Dec 25, 2009



Bruce Hussein Daddy posted:

Good one from reddit. White to mate in 2


Ooh, good. I like these kind of puzzles (easily winning, but find the clever mate)

Obfuscation
Jan 1, 2008
Good luck to you, I know you believe in hell
Feels like the easiest way to solve these is to find the flashiest move possible(Rg6 here) and then work backwards from there to figure out why it works. If the solution was boring, then nobody would post the puzzle.

cock hero flux
Apr 17, 2011



Bruce Hussein Daddy posted:

Good one from reddit. White to mate in 2


Qd4, h6, Qe5, h5, Qxh5# is the best I can come up with. I'm stuck on the idea of zugzwanging them into moving either their rook or pawn into a position that allows immediate mate but I can't see how to prevent them from doing h6 and surviving an extra move


edit: oh, wait, Rg6? might work? then either they move the rook and die or or move the pawn and the rook takes it and can't be taken because pin. I think that's it, because taking the rook allows the queen to slide over to the h file and mate

cock hero flux fucked around with this message at 15:16 on Feb 14, 2024

jesus WEP
Oct 17, 2004


is the answer Rg6, because if takes then Qh3#, and if push then R(x)h6#?

Arrhythmia
Jul 22, 2011

jesus WEP posted:

is the answer Rg6, because if takes then Qh3#, and if push then R(x)h6#?

Yeah. Also if ... R(anything) Qxg7#.

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jesus WEP
Oct 17, 2004


Arrhythmia posted:

Yeah. Also if ... R(anything) Qxg7#.
yeah - i started looking at this puzzle from the POV that only the h pawn can move. g pawn is pinned to the king, and rook is tied down to defending the g pawn. so i was looking at how to force an immediately losing move out of that h pawn

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