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I decided to prank my cousin by rolling coal at her gender reveal party. Her husband saw the all black smoke, thought it was the reveal and got pissed off and accused her of cheating on him. She's banned me from the baby shower so how the gently caress am I supposed to hit on her fiends now?!?!
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Feb 21, 2024 19:15
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| # ? May 20, 2024 17:34 |
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*puts up "Certified Badass Truck Driver" sticker in Harley Davidson font*
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Feb 21, 2024 19:17
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Feb 21, 2024 19:23
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~DEMVER~
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Feb 21, 2024 19:28
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Buce posted:~DEMVER~ 
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Feb 21, 2024 19:29
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Feb 21, 2024 19:30
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I live in the area but I've yet to see it in the wild. Hoping one day I do.
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Feb 21, 2024 19:31
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*pulls into construction site in Honda CVCC* Yeah I had to get a DD, it just wasn't worth driving a hundred miles each way in Bigfoot. I'll get a Harley once ~my wife~ stops nagging about bills
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Feb 21, 2024 19:35
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Nice mid sized truck there fella
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Feb 21, 2024 19:46
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Smugworth posted:Nice mid sized truck there fella If it was mine it would be 20x bigger.
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Feb 21, 2024 19:55
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I put some mounting points in the bed of my truck so I can attach seats for my kids. They have seat belts, and are facing backwards, and are up near the cab so they won't get bugs in their face. The little one has a tough time climbing into the bed so I have to lift the little bugger up there. It's only 4 feet. Kid needs to learn pull-ups.
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Feb 21, 2024 21:36
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man i hate my job. dont tell my wife, who i hate, but i got a thing for nancy in accounting, gonna ask her out later this week. i also hate my kids.
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Feb 21, 2024 21:40
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Hate my job, hate my wife, hate my kids, but I fuckin love TRUMP!!!
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Feb 21, 2024 21:42
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gently caress I gotta go and buy gas
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Feb 21, 2024 21:44
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymZPPCLQaTc
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Feb 21, 2024 21:48
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We say grace, and we say ma’am, if you aint into that we don’t give a drat
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Feb 21, 2024 21:56
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telling you the god drat government put something in the water. i'm huffing and puffing for ten minutes after getting up into the truck. swear to god this poo poo shouldn't be so hard. my dumbass son tells me it's "deep covid" or some bullshit but that's just the gov't lie again. fuckin' ex-wife must be filling their heads with lies again. some days i wish i'd fought for custody but hell if i got time to deal with some snotty kids myself, i'm a hard working american. god knows the girlfriend's no help in that regard, all she does is empty my drat wallet, but the wife went around and told a bunch of bullshit around town and i ain't going through another dry spell again. not much choice anyway i can't get into it with the girlfriend like i used to, ashamed to admit it but at this point she could probably whup my rear end and i gotta tread easy. it's not right but i just gotta deal with it until the good lord puts things right again and i can find an uncontaminated source again. bottled water doesn't help at all because that's just more gov't water. i tried doing a rain catchment but that gave me the runs and the chills so bad i couldn't get out of bed for days. i think they put a coating on the pipes or something like when they add the bitterent to the untaxed hooch. i tried getting my buddy rick to help me out with some pipes but he wants bitcash or something and i told him i don't do well with the internet but all the same he says he "won't accept that fiat trash" i told him it's real fuckin cash it ain't like a hot check but he's just stuck in the fuckin internet
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Feb 21, 2024 23:06
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googles barely legal teen from a Hardee’s parking lot
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Feb 21, 2024 23:15
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Fords workin' on the F750 I hear. 3 stories tall.
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Feb 21, 2024 23:52
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 *Yelling out of the window of his oversized truck* You're making us all look bad!! There's no way a stripper pole is street legal!!!
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Feb 22, 2024 01:10
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Smugworth posted:
Oh a 250? That’s cute.
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Feb 22, 2024 01:17
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I took my girl to the Cheesecake Factory and asked the manager if they had valet parking. He said they didn't so I laughed at him and told him just as well as a valet couldn't handle a real truck. I hit 3 cars in the parking lot on the way out, gently caress Joe Biden for making the menu so expensive
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Feb 22, 2024 03:04
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I'm feeling extra patriotic today, I'm gonna finance me a truck and modifications to make it so big no other truck can tow it when it gets repossessed.
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Feb 22, 2024 03:19
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I sure am glad I bought this here truck 
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Feb 22, 2024 03:39
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Snowy posted:I sure am glad I bought this here truck Not as glad as I am, your local Ram dealership finance guy. 96 months isn't that long if you think about it
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Feb 22, 2024 03:45
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I talk like I'm imitating a racist MMA podcast guy
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Feb 22, 2024 04:28
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Buce posted:~DEMVER~ The most important day in a man’s life is experiencing DEMVER. The second most important day is when you realise she has wheels.
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Feb 22, 2024 04:47
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I am literally the only person on this road that matters and I'm going to drive my big fuckoff truck down residential streets in a manner that reflects that. Take the chains off my tires? I'd just have to put them on again in 6 months. Also if my poorly secured load damages your car I'm somehow not responsible. The Bible fucked around with this message at 06:30 on Feb 22, 2024 |
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Feb 22, 2024 06:28
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The Bible posted:Also if my poorly secured load damages your car I'm somehow not responsible. I'm a portly, insecure load with a poorly secured load.
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Feb 22, 2024 15:58
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They took our jerbs!
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Feb 22, 2024 16:21
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Don’t forget the cat delete. Actually just get rid of the exhaust all together.
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Feb 22, 2024 16:47
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rgI2Zx2k0PQ
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Feb 22, 2024 21:11
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I call my wife the ol ball and chain ina joking voice but everyone know I really do just despise her and the only thing that gets me through the day is my blossoming prescription opiate addiction
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Feb 23, 2024 02:19
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EvilBlackRailgun posted:Don’t forget the cat delete. Actually just get rid of the exhaust all together. straight pipes really open her up. Who loving cares if I set off every car alarm on the street?
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Feb 23, 2024 02:20
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My giant rear end truck was assembled in 'murica *of nearly 51% 'murican made parts. I'm going to slap a huge American flag decal * printed in Thailand and some big assed aftermarket tires *made in China to prove what a proud American I am.
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Feb 23, 2024 03:15
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Harry_Potato posted:My giant rear end truck was assembled in 'murica *of nearly 51% 'murican made parts. I'm going to slap a huge American flag decal * printed in Thailand and some big assed aftermarket tires *made in China to prove what a proud American I am. So what, you're too good to roll coal with the rest of us?
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Feb 23, 2024 03:24
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Feb 23, 2024 03:28
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take me hooooooommee country roooooaad to the plaaaaaace I beloooong
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Feb 23, 2024 03:49
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I backed over my kid as I was leaving for work. Getting a bigger lift so this is less likely to happen to my other kids
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Feb 23, 2024 14:32
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| # ? May 20, 2024 17:34 |
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Wife mad
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Feb 23, 2024 14:32
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