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Flint_Paper posted:If I wanted to see heart-stopping tackle I'd drop my trousers and look in the mirror 
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Feb 26, 2024 20:21
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 100% true https://www.theguardian.com/world/2011/nov/14/pet-hippo-humphrey-kills-owner
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Feb 26, 2024 20:28
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Scratch Monkey posted:
if only thousands more zoologists had warned people about keeping hippos.
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Feb 26, 2024 20:29
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He didn't eat him, he simply chewed him. This month's Texas Monthly has an article about an exotic pet collector who nearly got exsanguinated by his warthog
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Feb 26, 2024 20:32
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quote:South African media reported earlier this year that a 52-year-old man and his seven-year-old grandson spent two hours in a tree after being chased by Humphrey while canoeing on the river that passes through the farm. Els finally tempted the hippo away with an apple while the pair were rescued by paramedics. I unno what to think of this. On one hand, stalking on innocent paddlers is awful. The calves were probably destined to be eaten anyway, so that's kind of neutral to me. But sign me up for a reality show where golfers get chased by hungry hungry hippos, that sounds like wholesome entertainment for all age groups!
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Feb 26, 2024 20:42
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If golf clubs were required to have a golfer-chasing wild animal on premises, I could get behind that.... uhhh.... "sport."
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Feb 26, 2024 20:44
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Soul Dentist posted:Ok but why would a mod post a heart-stopping tackle here in the schadenfreude thread
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Feb 26, 2024 20:54
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Air Skwirl posted:Catenfreude: Contrary to popular belief, turtles are fast little fuckers
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Feb 26, 2024 21:00
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Zero One posted:Goons shouldn't attend hockey games, apparently.  There was a goon who got hosed up by an escalator at a game in St. Louis. I don't remember their name though. https://www.espn.com/nhl/news/story?id=4546692
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Feb 26, 2024 21:25
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https://i.imgur.com/tSlyinE.mp4 confused by love.
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Feb 26, 2024 22:49
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lol, why did her brain grind to halt only on the return trip?
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Feb 26, 2024 23:01
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She became a cat
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Feb 26, 2024 23:03
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Scratch Monkey posted:
A lot of people violate the First Rule of Pet Ownership: Never own a pet that you can’t defeat in unarmed combat just in case of food chain disputes.
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Feb 26, 2024 23:04
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fishing with the fam posted:lol, why did her brain grind to halt only on the return trip? Cupid got her through the mailbox
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Feb 26, 2024 23:23
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Which animals can you defeat in a fight?
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Feb 27, 2024 00:13
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bad_fmr posted:Which animals can you defeat in a fight? Do I have time to train?
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Feb 27, 2024 00:19
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My cat could beat up your cat
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Feb 27, 2024 00:21
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Pigsfeet on Rye posted:A lot of people violate the First Rule of Pet Ownership: Never own a pet that you can’t defeat in unarmed combat just in case of food chain disputes. I hear d&d and cspam have loads of guides on how to defeat dogs
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Feb 27, 2024 00:26
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bad_fmr posted:Which animals can you defeat in a fight? 1. A snail (soft) 2. Most insects (small) 3. A shrimp (no fists) 4. A velociraptor (it's dead) 5. Some birds (hollow bones)
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Feb 27, 2024 00:30
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ilmucche posted:I hear d&d and cspam have loads of guides on how to defeat dogs https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YET1zPShbmE
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Feb 27, 2024 00:31
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mrfart posted:https://i.imgur.com/tSlyinE.mp4 Do you understand love, mrfart?
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Feb 27, 2024 00:31
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FreudianSlippers posted:3. A shrimp (no fists) You are a fool https://youtube.com/watch?v=ti2Uoc1RXuQ
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Feb 27, 2024 00:45
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bad_fmr posted:Which animals can you defeat in a fight? I had to throw a half-nelson on my dog once, he couldn't do poo poo
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Feb 27, 2024 01:06
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ShPApHoX7o
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Feb 27, 2024 01:19
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Kennel posted:The Soul lives in the heart. Anubis? Is that you?
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Feb 27, 2024 01:19
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You wouldn't understand.
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Feb 27, 2024 01:48
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zoux posted:He didn't eat him, he simply chewed him. Esteban!
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Feb 27, 2024 02:14
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bad_fmr posted:Which animals can you defeat in a fight? Can we use simple tools like sticks and slings or are we going straight up tooth and claw here?
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Feb 27, 2024 02:18
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Robobot posted:Can we use simple tools like sticks and slings or are we going straight up tooth and claw here? Mano a la Pata, my friend
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Feb 27, 2024 02:31
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https://i.imgur.com/fA1XFkR.mp4 Sorry it’s not a mossy terrarium, enjoyed it anyway.
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Feb 27, 2024 02:38
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I can beat most animals in a fight as long as they are asleep when the fight starts.
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Feb 27, 2024 02:38
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Feb 27, 2024 02:41
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I could beat almost any given crab, having stacked my evolutionary stats in size rather than superior body design
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Feb 27, 2024 02:49
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This show is so good.
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Feb 27, 2024 02:49
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Hell yeah let's add to the listSoul Dentist posted:Near the beginning of the last thread I did a bit where I pretended to have a white board where I wrote down everything that goons threatened to fight. The one before it was mad af about seagulls for a while, for example. The list I've written down so far is justv
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Feb 27, 2024 02:50
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why would you start a fight with a capybara, the chillest of animals?
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Feb 27, 2024 03:02
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Grem posted:I can beat most animals in a fight as long as they are asleep when the fight starts.
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Feb 27, 2024 03:03
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It's almost evolutionary that people think they can win a fight against any animal. That's the only reason I can think of for such misplaced confidence and stupidity. Maybe without those we'd never have left the caves because we were scared of various critters out there 
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Feb 27, 2024 03:13
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Samovar posted:Now is a good a time as any to post this. "What's the physio gonna do?" 
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Feb 27, 2024 03:21
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6% of Americans think they could beat Jack Reacher in a fight.
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Feb 27, 2024 03:22
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