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A Sneaker Broker
Feb 14, 2020

Daily Dose of Internet Brain Rot

SKULL.GIF posted:

What's the worst that could happen, they win another Super Bowl?

Hahahhaha

Goddamnit if Mahomes gets 4 before he turns 30, I swear to ...

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mcmagic
Jul 1, 2004

If you see this avatar while scrolling the succ zone, you have been visited by the mcmagic of shitty lib takes! Good luck and prosperity will come to you, but only if you reply "shut the fuck up mcmagic" to this post!

Professor Funk posted:

For Sutton? Sure. I think that's good business if you can get him for a mid or late-rounder. His contract has two years left at reasonable cap hits (which aligns well with the Rodgers window) and his skillset with mesh well with Wilson. I'd rather pay him and, I dunno, Boyd or Curtis Samuel like $20 million a year than pay Calvin Ridley $25 million a year or whatever stupid deal he's going to get.

What are the needle-moving options you won't be mad about?

I listed a few guys who might shake loose. Lockett, Cooks and Godwin. Mike Williams too but he's such an injury risk I'm not sure if I'd do it.

wandler20
Nov 13, 2002

How many Championships?

mcmagic posted:

I listed a few guys who might shake loose. Lockett, Cooks and Godwin. Mike Williams too but he's such an injury risk I'm not sure if I'd do it.

You're insane if you think the Bucs are getting rid of Godwin.

mcmagic
Jul 1, 2004

If you see this avatar while scrolling the succ zone, you have been visited by the mcmagic of shitty lib takes! Good luck and prosperity will come to you, but only if you reply "shut the fuck up mcmagic" to this post!

wandler20 posted:

You're insane if you think the Bucs are getting rid of Godwin.

They just paid Evans and they have to pay Baker. I think it's a non zero chance. These good WRs get moved more than people expect.

Professor Funk
Aug 4, 2008

WE ALL KNOW WHAT NEEDS TO HAPPEN

mcmagic posted:

They just paid Evans and they have to pay Baker. I think it's a non zero chance. These good WRs get moved more than people expect.

I dunno about the names you listed. Cooks and Lockett are fine players (Lockett especially) but I don’t think the Jets need smaller guys behind Wilson.

You’re right that unexpected names always become available and those are the players the Jets will need to get creative with and chase.

wandler20
Nov 13, 2002

How many Championships?

mcmagic posted:

They just paid Evans and they have to pay Baker. I think it's a non zero chance. These good WRs get moved more than people expect.

Getting rid of him only saves them $1m and he's in the final year of his contract. If they need space they can restructure. The Bucs are trying to win while the NFCS is down, not rebuild.

mcmagic
Jul 1, 2004

If you see this avatar while scrolling the succ zone, you have been visited by the mcmagic of shitty lib takes! Good luck and prosperity will come to you, but only if you reply "shut the fuck up mcmagic" to this post!

Professor Funk posted:

I dunno about the names you listed. Cooks and Lockett are fine players (Lockett especially) but I don’t think the Jets need smaller guys behind Wilson.

You’re right that unexpected names always become available and those are the players the Jets will need to get creative with and chase.

Those guys are highly productive all the time unlike pretty much any of the other guys available. Give me that over 6'3 any day.

Shrimpy
May 18, 2004

Sir, I'm going to need to see your ticket.

Professor Funk posted:

It's a post about what I would do, not what I think the team will do. If they're going to really try to make Lazard a functional WR3, then, yeah, they should probably chase a bigger fish to be WR2. Not sure who that is.

It's MVS

BlindSite
Feb 8, 2009

There's a speed demon or two in the draft who figure to be there at the turn.

Docjowles
Apr 9, 2009

Ches Neckbeard posted:

The entire football world has seen Bath too the Jets for what a year now? It's as obvious as his inevitable week 2 injury

Does he still refuse to play on artificial turf or did that end up being fake news. Signing a guy who at full health will only play like half the games would be something

sharknado slashfic
Jun 24, 2011

The Ravens are going to win the Superbowl

kiimo
Jul 24, 2003

Did I read that right? The bills released five defensive backs? Are they just done?

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

kiimo posted:

Did I read that right? The bills released five defensive backs? Are they just done?

3. 2 are washed other is a jag.

They've got a bunch of overpaid middling guys and washed rear end Von Miller just chomping down on cap space.

fsif
Jul 18, 2003

Micah Hyde's contract also expired and he's been mulling retirement.

So, 3 of their 4 starters going into the beginning of last season likely won't be there in 2024.

sexy tiger boobs
Aug 23, 2002

Up shit creek with a turd for a paddle.

https://www.wrbl.com/news/some-chie...m_content=other

Tomahawk chop... off your appendages

Sono
Apr 9, 2008




Docjowles posted:

I'm here for the deranged pretzel logic that gets them from Bryce Needs Weapons to trading a top 3 pick for Travis Kelce

Tepper proudly announces that he's acquired Kelce's rights from the Eagles.

Jason plays along and becomes the best blocking TE in NFL history.

Asproigerosis
Mar 13, 2013

insufferable

sharknado slashfic posted:

The Ravens are going to win the Superbowl

gotta win a playoff game first, lamar

sweet thursday
Sep 16, 2012

I heard CJayC called someone a lamar

ozymandius1024
Mar 15, 2006

You don't yank on the Spine of God

Sono posted:

Tepper proudly announces that he's acquired Kelce's rights from the Eagles.

Jason plays along and becomes the best blocking TE in NFL history.

Improvement over Ian Thomas? Almost certainly.

Gully Foyle
Feb 29, 2008

kiimo posted:

Did I read that right? The bills released five defensive backs? Are they just done?

Bills had two choices.
Somehow do crazy restructuring and keep most of the current old guard, try for one more shot with the team that keeps falling short and just hope that things fall their way with an even older team (and then be in Saints cap hell for the next half decade).
Or do a soft rebuild, get the defense younger and in shape with future cap space for another potential half decade of chances, as long as Allen doesn't die.

I think it's the right choice, the same team but older and more expensive wasn't gonna go the distance in 2024 without having the Chiefs luck.

Black Lighter
Sep 6, 2010

Just keep looking at what we're doing, keep watering and ask yourselves first and know 'Are you watering? And are you fertilizing every day?' So when it's time to pop, it'll pop.

Gully Foyle posted:

Bills had two choices.
Somehow do crazy restructuring and keep most of the current old guard, try for one more shot with the team that keeps falling short and just hope that things fall their way with an even older team (and then be in Saints cap hell for the next half decade).
Or do a soft rebuild, get the defense younger and in shape with future cap space for another potential half decade of chances, as long as Allen doesn't die.

I think it's the right choice, the same team but older and more expensive wasn't gonna go the distance in 2024 without having the Chiefs luck.

It'll be interesting to see what this means for McDermott long term. Like, if they fall short of the playoffs, does he get the benefit of the rebuild doubt? Or is it an easy excuse to show him the door?

wandler20
Nov 13, 2002

How many Championships?
I hope Loomis somehow messes up and the funniest thing ever happens.

https://x.com/Kat_Terrell/status/1765800909500543323?s=20

AAAAA! Real Muenster
Jul 12, 2008

My QB is also named Bort

wandler20 posted:

I hope Loomis somehow messes up and the funniest thing ever happens.

https://x.com/Kat_Terrell/status/1765800909500543323?s=20
Now I'm hoping he fails to void them, then like... disappears to Cambodia or Tanzania or something.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



wandler20 posted:

I hope Loomis somehow messes up and the funniest thing ever happens.

https://x.com/Kat_Terrell/status/1765800909500543323?s=20

I'm not saying, I'm just saying if any Falcons fans wanted some 28-3 vengeance....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vvN4pSey-NM

Silly Burrito
Nov 27, 2007

SET A COURSE FOR
THE FLAVOR QUADRANT
We’re good unless they kidnap Khai Hartley too, then we’re in trouble.

Docjowles
Apr 9, 2009

Kalli posted:

I'm not saying, I'm just saying if any Falcons fans wanted some 28-3 vengeance....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vvN4pSey-NM

I have absolutely no memory of this movie existing. Which is probably for the best. Can Akroyd be brought to the Hague for that accent, Jesus

Shinjobi
Jul 10, 2008


Gravy Boat 2k

Kalli posted:

I'm not saying, I'm just saying if any Falcons fans wanted some 28-3 vengeance....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vvN4pSey-NM

Judd Apatow and Colin Quinn wrote a masterpiece

seiferguy
Jun 9, 2005

FLAWED
INTUITION



Toilet Rascal
It's Florio but fans that attended the Dolphins / Chiefs game are probably have to get appendages amputated from frostbite:

https://www.nbcsports.com/nfl/profootballtalk/rumor-mill/news/report-some-frostbitten-fans-from-dolphins-chief-came-might-need-amputations

Imagine losing fingers over watching a football game lmao

Silly Burrito
Nov 27, 2007

SET A COURSE FOR
THE FLAVOR QUADRANT

seiferguy posted:

It's Florio but fans that attended the Dolphins / Chiefs game are probably have to get appendages amputated from frostbite:

https://www.nbcsports.com/nfl/profootballtalk/rumor-mill/news/report-some-frostbitten-fans-from-dolphins-chief-came-might-need-amputations

Imagine losing fingers over watching a football game lmao

Now imagine Mike Vrabel winning a Super Bowl with the Titans.

D-LINK
Oct 1, 2007

I was talking to peachy Peach about kissy Kiss. He bought me a soda.

DeimosRising posted:

If he throws for 26 tds and 11 ints in Pittsburgh next year they’ll win 13 games and I will hate every loving second of it

Guess what big shooter, he's meeting with them imminently lol

kiimo
Jul 24, 2003

I will watch the mental health deterioration of Russell Wilson with great interest.


Nobody seems to survive Pittsburgh with all their faculties intact

D-LINK
Oct 1, 2007

I was talking to peachy Peach about kissy Kiss. He bought me a soda.
People in Javon Belcher houses shouldn't throw stones imo

Declan MacManus
Sep 1, 2011

damn i'm really in this bitch

you seem upset

bothered

perhaps, even, mad?

D-LINK
Oct 1, 2007

I was talking to peachy Peach about kissy Kiss. He bought me a soda.
Yeah buddy, I'm big mad, and didn't just take the easy retort

Declan MacManus
Sep 1, 2011

damn i'm really in this bitch

the easy retort is the refuge of the teary eyed and the red faced

D-LINK
Oct 1, 2007

I was talking to peachy Peach about kissy Kiss. He bought me a soda.
Your mom is teary eyed and red faced that her son is dumber than a sack of hammers

Amy Pole Her
Jun 17, 2002
“Dune? Yeah I’m Dune your mom”was the pinnacle of mom jokes so please everyone respect that

No Butt Stuff
Jun 10, 2004

seiferguy posted:

It's Florio but fans that attended the Dolphins / Chiefs game are probably have to get appendages amputated from frostbite:

https://www.nbcsports.com/nfl/profootballtalk/rumor-mill/news/report-some-frostbitten-fans-from-dolphins-chief-came-might-need-amputations

Imagine losing fingers over watching a football game lmao

You had to be a special kind of stupid. Bundle up, bring hand warmers, and cardboard. This wasn’t hard.

Silly Burrito
Nov 27, 2007

SET A COURSE FOR
THE FLAVOR QUADRANT

No Butt Stuff posted:

You had to be a special kind of stupid. Bundle up, bring hand warmers, and cardboard. This wasn’t hard.

Serious question….cardboard?

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mcmagic
Jul 1, 2004

If you see this avatar while scrolling the succ zone, you have been visited by the mcmagic of shitty lib takes! Good luck and prosperity will come to you, but only if you reply "shut the fuck up mcmagic" to this post!
I just love the Vikings looking at the last 5 years of Jets QB play and saying "I'd like to have some of that please!"

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