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The dinos all had guns in the original theatrical cut of the movie. They were just digitally edited out for subsequent releases.
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Mar 18, 2024 19:05
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Jurassic Park is one of my favorite films. It's also one where the morals aren't what they think it is and the basic premise is thus kind of nonsense. No one dies because nature found a way. Even if the dinosaurs started breeding, so what? They could correct that. People die because of Nedry's deliberate act of sabotage. The only reason anything bad happens in Jurassic Park is because a greedy rear end in a top hat deliberately sabotaged the park. Capitalism is why we cannot have nice things is the movie's actual message. And "nature finds a way" only makes sense if you forget agriculture and animal husbandry exist. Like the basic premise of the supposed cautionary tale only works if you, you know, forget that civilization exists. It's a testament to how good the film is that it works in spite of this.
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Mar 18, 2024 20:19
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Life finds a way was never the issue in the book either. The film mostly limits things to Dennis's sabotage but the book is a lot more focused on systemic collapse leading to the breakout. It wasn't one single thing that broke the park.
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Mar 18, 2024 20:23
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reignofevil posted:Jurassic park was a movie about cgi and jurassic park 2 was a movie about how badass it is to go camping in a gigantic triple trailer rv and to ride motorcycles. Jurassic park 3 was a movie about collecting t-rex pee and how that would bring pervy spinosauruses around. Jurassic park 4 was a snuff film. Jurassic park 5 was some poo poo about a mansion and international diamond auctions or some poo poo. Jurassic park 6 came out already in 2022.
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Mar 18, 2024 20:26
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I can’t believe Jurassic park predicted that an owner of a giant company would go cheap on the security and IT
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Mar 18, 2024 21:03
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It was pretty wild how Jurassic Park came out in 1991, yet it had a scene where George W Hush pays a t-Rex to crash a plane into the Triceratops Towers
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Mar 18, 2024 21:06
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Gutcruncher posted:But if there’s an odd number of Irish people what will the leftover Irishman do? Find out in star trek: Picard: O'Brien: Origins this summer exclusively on Plus The Home Of Paramount
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Mar 18, 2024 21:11
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Arc Hammer posted:Life finds a way was never the issue in the book either. The film mostly limits things to Dennis's sabotage but the book is a lot more focused on systemic collapse leading to the breakout. It wasn't one single thing that broke the park. I remember reading the book and it suddenly occurring to me that the fact that the dinosaurs were breeding basically had no practical impact on the events of the movie, it was more just kind of a vague spielbergian "oh wow. wow, huh? how about that" because, in the book, that does happen, but it's a problem because, after the fences go down, they think for a long time that the uhhh raptors(? it's been a minute) hadn't escaped because the automated system is designed to look for say 22 dinosaurs, and if any escaped, the count would drop, and it never dropped. so no dinosaurs had escaped, right? then malcoln was like "... have it check for 23." and they're like "  "and the computer's like "23 of 22 raptors found  "and they're like "what? gently caress you. what? what???" and malcolm's like "haha. have it check for, mm... 150" and they're like "jesus christ. no way...  "and the computer goes like uh "74 of 22 raptors found" and someone is like "LOL there's not 150 of them. you were wrong, idiot" (my recollection of this scene is 100% accurate) and malcolm is like "yeah I didn't think there would be but. you were checking if there were less than the expected number to make sure none had escaped. so your computer reached 22 and stopped counting, because you never accounted for the idea that there might be more than the expected number." and they're like "gently caress you you infuriating rear end. they're all female, how can there be more than expected?" and he's like "I dunno dude that's not really how chaos theory works. I just knew something bad was gonna happen. lame rear end regular science worries about mechanisms in a vacuum, and look where that got you. anyway you're missing the point- if we don't know how many there in total, we don't know how many have escaped." that was my favorite segment of the book as a kid because it had a chart and was about computers  also yeah there was that thing about the... the dinosaurs are engineered to require a particular amino acid to live (I think this was another thing that was nominally in the movie but they didn't really do much with) so that even if they did escape, they wouldn't be able to survive outside of captivity. then at the end of the book, they think that they've at least stopped the dinosaurs from getting off the island, because... there were some on a boat I think, but they got the people on the boat to turn around? and if I'm not mistaken some dudes show up with machine guns and bazookas and literally just loving blow every single dinosaur to hell. dino problem dusted. then it cuts to like days or weeks later, and grant or whoever is being held by... uh, the government or something? and he's like "yo when do we get out of here?" and the special agent dude or whoever that came to talk to him is like "[mysterious smile], ... , I hope you find the accommodations here agreeable, mr. grant. you'll want to make yourself as comfortable as you can... I'm off to address an agricultural crisis. it seems that near the coast some unknown herd animal has been rapidly consuming uh this particular kind of plant that's very rich in this rare amino acid." and it's like oh wow they didn't even manage like the most basic entry-level bare minimum of not loving up 
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Mar 18, 2024 21:20
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ian malcolm in the book is pretty cool because he spends the whole second half of it high on morphine telling everyone how right he was and how hosed they are
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Mar 18, 2024 21:45
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Dinosaurs are big dumb animals that you could pretty easily mow down with modern weaponry if you wanted to. Hell species are going extinct that we’re actively trying to save. So yeah dinosaurs being an actual threat only works in the first movie because of very specific circumstances, and even then “nature finds a way”/powerlessness of man vs. nature never really is the main theme. It’s definitely greed and capitalism fucks everything up. The rest of the stories that spunoff from that are just pure schlock. Some of the dumbest poo poo is the idea of using dinosaurs as weapons.
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Mar 18, 2024 21:58
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colonelwest posted:Dinosaurs are big dumb animals that you could pretty easily mow down with modern weaponry if you wanted to. Indiana Jones 6 where they use the Dial of Destiny to go even further back in time to machine gun dinosaurs instead of Romans.
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Mar 18, 2024 22:01
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stephenthinkpad posted:Spielberg blockbusters always play fast and loose with the plot, compared to gold standard Cameron. Like some movies you just treat them as roller coaster rides instead of stories. Jurassic Park's premise has all sorts of problems, but it doesn't matter because its not really what drives the movie and it works perfectly as a self contained story. Having said that, I love how dumb it is when you think about it, not just because cloning them like that is impossible, but also the idea that you can keep an entire ecosystem's worth of the largest land carnivores and herbivores in Earth's history alive on a tiny Caribbean island, which gets particularly bad later in the first two sequels when the parks have been abandoned so all the animals are just surviving on their own without human help, and the franchise just gets progressively stupider until the final movie where they've essentially created the most catastrophic possible invasive species crisis where said invasive species have transcended the barriers of time itself to gently caress with new ecosystems. khwarezm fucked around with this message at 22:04 on Mar 18, 2024 |
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Mar 18, 2024 22:01
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Good news, Moonheads! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UEJuNHOd8Dw
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Mar 18, 2024 22:03
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Mordja posted:Good news, Moonheads! God I hope this means another round of press junkets where Zack Snyder visibly wants to kill the interview and then himself any time people go “BUT IF NETFLIX WOULD YOU SUPERMAN!?”
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Mar 18, 2024 22:06
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The Scargiver
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Mar 18, 2024 22:10
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Space Jam posted:ian malcolm in the book is pretty cool because he spends the whole second half of it high on morphine telling everyone how right he was and how hosed they are people give crichton poo poo for his pettiness and superiority but that's actually an insanely based way to treat your author self-insert imagine if that's how roddenberry wrote wesley crusher. just lying on a slab high out of his mind literally not helping at all but saying he told you so
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Mar 18, 2024 22:13
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Mordja posted:Good news, Moonheads! I probably value my time so little I'll check this out at some point, same reason I watched the first.
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Mar 18, 2024 22:14
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They didn't even release the real version of the first one yet. How many versions of this one will there be?
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Mar 18, 2024 22:15
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Cubone posted:lol That's all being a Traveller really is
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Mar 18, 2024 22:17
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Cubone posted:lol Lol that would have been amazing, but you’d need another actor, Will Wheaton was born to play himself (an annoying dweeb).
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Mar 18, 2024 22:19
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Arc Hammer posted:Indiana Jones 6 where they use the Dial of Destiny to go even further back in time to machine gun dinosaurs instead of Romans. We know where mutt died but do any of us really know when.
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Mar 18, 2024 22:21
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Hot take, Crichton was a lot like Stephen King in that he was a popular, pulpy writer where the adaptations of his work were frequently better than the original. Also, he turned into such a loving prick with his crank opinions on global warming by the end of his life in his capacity as a guy who read articles in Scientific American and based a book off of them.
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Mar 18, 2024 22:23
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Picard, Riker, and Wesley Crusher were all self inserts, each one how Roddenberry saw himself at different points in his life. Wesley is the prodigal child, who knows everything and is always outsmarting the adults. Riker is virile strong man in his prime, constantly banging hot ladies. Picard is the older philosopher and diplomat, using his wisdom to solve all disputes peacefully.
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Mar 18, 2024 22:23
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PostNouveau posted:The cliff is similar to that sequence in The Dark Knight Rises where the attack on the stock trading floor turns into a chase that goes from day to night when it enters a tunnel just because Nolan wanted the chase to end at night. Filmmaker wanted to do something, knew he could get away with it, and so did it. Maybe another writing pass on the script could have given them a good reason for both these things, but ultimately it's not necessary because 95% of the audience will go along with it. For me the dark night chase day to night is one that didn't work so well, as going from a shot during day time to night is such a common way for films to show passage of time, my brains automatically think, okay so how much time just passed then. Quickly forget about it, but as you get so used to film makers using methods like that to show that time past, that I think a lot of people would of picked up on it stright away. Seem to remember at release people were talking about it a bit.
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Mar 18, 2024 22:29
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dr_rat posted:For me the dark night chase day to night is one that didn't work so well, as going from a shot during day time to night is such a common way for films to show passage of time, my brains automatically think, okay so how much time just passed then. Dark Knight Rises certainly isn't a good enough movie for me to just go with the flow and ignore it compared to Jurassic Park.
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Mar 18, 2024 22:35
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Ok, so Bane vs Raptors armed with lasers vs Zach Sneider’s Rebel Moon Jesus digitally replaced by Tog Notaro
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Mar 18, 2024 22:41
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Gene Dickandballs
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Mar 18, 2024 22:43
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The one thing that sticks with me to this day about reading Crichton's book about 20 years ago was when he went on and on about Cray supercomputers
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Mar 18, 2024 22:44
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billymumphrey posted:The one thing that sticks with me to this day about reading Crichton's book about 20 years ago was when he went on and on about Cray supercomputers Its because they fuckin ruled at the time
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Mar 18, 2024 22:48
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Mar 18, 2024 22:49
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Mar 18, 2024 22:50
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Nowadays even lions need to be kept in gaming reserves to be protected from human traps. There are very few wild horses and wild tigers. Dinos in the wild will be starved to death in no time. Only sea dinosaurs can stay alive on their own. Aren't sharks as old as dinosaurs?
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Mar 18, 2024 23:00
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Modern sharks evolved during the Jurassic period, so yeah they stumbled onto a good thing apparently. Crocodiles are even older, by 50 million years!
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Mar 18, 2024 23:11
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dr_rat posted:Crocodiles are even older, by 50 million years! And boy do they look it!
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Mar 18, 2024 23:22
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Cool dinosaur!!!
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Mar 18, 2024 23:33
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Oh okay
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Mar 18, 2024 23:33
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remake jurassic park but it's about a regular zoo and keep all of Jeff Goldblum's dialogue the same.
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Mar 19, 2024 00:11
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Man, in his infinite hubris, believes he can control nature but he can't. These sea lions will escape and kill us all.
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Mar 19, 2024 00:13
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what irritates me more is how did the t-rex get into the bridge of the ship and eat the pilot at the end of the lost world?
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Mar 19, 2024 00:21
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Remake Jurassic Park in Vietnam and include a scene where Mutt is mauled by a Velociraptor.
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Mar 19, 2024 00:23
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