r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

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Midnight Voyager: Jul 2, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

I can't imagine any reason to scream at 30 MPH unless there's a living being within ten feet on the road or something.

# ? Mar 24, 2024 21:14

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# ? May 29, 2024 18:38

AceClown: Sep 11, 2005

Midnight Voyager posted:

I can't imagine any reason to scream at 30 MPH unless there's a living being within ten feet on the road or something.

unless you're in a tesla

# ? Mar 24, 2024 21:24

John Wick of Dogs: Mar 4, 2017; A real hellraiser

I like in Keeping Up Appearances whenever Richard is driving and Hyacinth is like "Mind those trees dear"

# ? Mar 24, 2024 21:37

rotinaj: Sep 5, 2008; Fun Shoe

AceClown posted:

unless you're in a tesla

You should be screaming at all times when in a tesla

# ? Mar 24, 2024 21:42

oh jay: Oct 15, 2012

rotinaj posted:

You should be screaming at all times when in a tesla

I didn't realize that Elong invented the Monsters Inc tech

# ? Mar 24, 2024 21:43

Pantaloon Pontiff: Jun 25, 2023

High Grandpa is great, "look you're a little poo poo for leaving pot brownies out, but also lol at the idea this is my first time getting high".

Cerekk posted:

I had to piss really bad at the end of Return of the King in the theater while it was doing a bunch of fakeout endings in a row. I just kept getting madder every time it faded to black and then faded back in somewhere else to tack on a wrapup of some other D plot that I didn't give a poo poo about. Anyway this woman's four word review is pretty hard to improve upon in both accuracy and conciseness imo.

I feel your pain. I watched LOTR in the theater and had popcorn and a drink, and had to pee BAD by the end. But it was so close to the end of the movie and I didn't want to miss anything, and managed to discover a fun fact. Did you know that there is running water in the background, and therefore running water sounds, for pretty much the entire last 20 minutes of the movie? I remember that very well.

Captain Hygiene posted:

Thank you. I liked the LOTR movies a lot when they came out, but somehow they managed to take a light, peppy kids' book and drag it out into the most pointlessly sloggy trilogy, it even made me care about the LOTR movies less retroactively.

I think you're getting The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings mixed up - The Hobbit is a light, peppy kid's book, but LOTR is a single giant novel split into a trilogy for publication and is significantly more sloggy than the movies. The Hobbit movies did take the kids book and turn it into a sloggy trilogy.

# ? Mar 24, 2024 21:46

sullat: Jan 9, 2012

keep punching joe posted:

The LOTR movies suck rear end and I say this as a turbo nerd who reads that poo poo on an annual basis.

Peter Jackson did his best work with a budget of $1000 and a bunch of rubber props. Giving him a huge budget was a mistake although I guess he got to bring some that home to NZ so their plan worked.

# ? Mar 24, 2024 22:18

CharlestheHammer: Jun 26, 2011; YOU SAY MY POSTS ARE THE RAVINGS OF THE DUMBEST PERSON ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH BUT YOU YOURSELF ARE READING THEM. CURIOUS!

sullat posted:

Peter Jackson did his best work with a budget of $1000 and a bunch of rubber props. Giving him a huge budget was a mistake although I guess he got to bring some that home to NZ so their plan worked.

NZ did not benefit from the LOTR movies and in fact the acting unions were broken so the movie could happen

# ? Mar 24, 2024 22:34

mystes: May 31, 2006

CharlestheHammer posted:

NZ did not benefit from the LOTR movies and in fact the acting unions were broken so the movie could happen

Didn't it increase tourism or something at least?

# ? Mar 24, 2024 22:37

Benagain: Oct 10, 2007; Can you see that I am serious?; Fun Shoe

CharlestheHammer posted:

NZ did not benefit from the LOTR movies and in fact the acting unions were broken so the movie could happen

I thought that was just for hobbit?

# ? Mar 24, 2024 22:39

Saint Isaias Boner: Jan 17, 2007; hi how are you ♥

I for one enjoyed the extended tom bombadil sequence in the hobbit

# ? Mar 24, 2024 22:42

wheatpuppy: Apr 25, 2008; YOU HAVE MY POST!

Pantaloon Pontiff posted:

I think you're getting The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings mixed up - The Hobbit is a light, peppy kid's book, but LOTR is a single giant novel split into a trilogy for publication and is significantly more sloggy than the movies. The Hobbit movies did take the kids book and turn it into a sloggy trilogy.

That is literally what he said? And that the Hobbit movies were so bad, it *also* ruined his enjoyment of LoTR.

# ? Mar 24, 2024 22:48

Shanghaied: Oct 12, 2004; BIG PAD

Benagain posted:

I thought that was just for hobbit?

Yes, between LOTR and the Hobbit, NZ film workers discovered that they made significantly less than their American colleagues doing the same jobs on the same films. A bunch of film industry unions around the world, including SAG, issued Do Not Work orders for the Hobbit films. Warner Brothers then pressured the NZ government to pass a law to make all film, TV, and game workers independent contractors by default, and made it illegal for them to unionise. And NZ government also refunded like 20% of the production cost to WB. That law was thankfully repealed a couple of years ago.

# ? Mar 24, 2024 22:50

Pantaloon Pontiff: Jun 25, 2023

wheatpuppy posted:

That is literally what he said? And that the Hobbit movies were so bad, it *also* ruined his enjoyment of LoTR.

I read the 'they' as referring to the LOTR movies, not the creators of the movies. It makes much more sense to use they as meaning 'the movie makers' there so I think I just misinterpreted it.

# ? Mar 24, 2024 23:08

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

Last year's saga about an entire extended family ripping itself apart after some kids fell into a pool while trying to do a tiktok prank received an epilogue

TLDR: stop, they're already dead

quote:

Thought it would be worth an update for anyone who's interested.

Unsurprisingly my oldest sister and brother in law have filed for Chapter 7 bankruptcy. While I don't care about what happens to them financially or otherwise they've also managed to drag my parents into their mess, which I'm not happy about.

At the start of the year my BIL's oversized-customized-pride-and-joy truck was repossessed. Pretty embarrassing for him I'm sure, happened at work. This was their breaking point, without the truck they have to share a Kia my parents loaned them and they can barely fit in it with their three kids. Financially they're f'd. They owe at least $125K (probably more) on high interest credit cards, they have zero equity in their house, and have a couple of personal loans that I'm pretty certain they got under false pretenses. They have loans on their jet skis, ATVs and trailers. They also owe a chunk of money from defaulting on the truck lease.

They hadn't made any payments on their credit cards or loans in months and were behind on their house payments as well. They got out of the lease on my sister's massive SUV late last year. They were upside down on it as well so had to come up with cash to do so. They also had to pay an attorney, the fine and court costs for my BIL's trespassing charge at the vacation house. And they owe my middle sister and her husband money for bail and their portion of the damages to the place.

As I've mentioned before my folks have never been financial wizards, but they have at least been generally responsible. They're retired, their home is paid off and they live off of social security and pensions. Altogether they get more than they spend. Minimal savings, just an emergency fund. Turns out my folks emptied out that fund, cashed out their small IRA (~$20K) and gave it to my sister. That let her catch up on the house payment and cover the negative equity on her car lease. But now literally every bit of savings my parents possessed is gone. Plus my parents have been paying for their groceries for several months and continue to pay the insurance on the car they loaned my sister.

According to my dad my sisters worked my mom for weeks to get her to fork over the money. They'd worked on both my folks at the same time for a while but my dad flat out refused every time. Eventually mom caved, she was worried that my sister would have to move to a hovel in some backwater town and that the kids would be barefoot and eating dirt. Dad's not happy about it, and to say there's some tension between them right now is an understatement. But they'll be fine.

I was pretty disappointed when my parents told me all this but I wasn't surprised. It sucks that that they emptied out their savings to help but I kind of get it, the way the bankruptcy laws are in our state by getting caught up on the home loan my sister should be able to keep the house. I tried hard not to say how I felt about this and my sisters, mostly succeeded. Really I'm way more pissed about this than I should be.

The worst part for me is that my sister and BIL could now contact me and my wife without any real fear of repercussions. The only penalty the no contact agreement has is that if they violate it we can go after them for the money they made from renting out the vacation house and related damages. Since they've filed for bankruptcy that's now not an impediment for them. I'm hoping they'll leave us alone but who knows.

Folks also told me that my middle sister and her husband have "hit a rough spot" and that he's not currently living with her and the kids. Just a guess but I imagine he's had it with the whole family dynamic that caused this nonsense.

Not directly related, but on a brighter note I've spent two weekends at the mountain house since the start of the year, once with my wife and once alone. Both times there was a lot of snow. It was incredibly beautiful and relaxing. Very therapeutic. The place also has good Internet service now (thanks Starlink) which is nice. Plus knowing that I can count on David (the property manager) to keep the place in shape / ready for us to visit and to help if we get snowed in eliminates most of the stress in owning it. My folks have used it a few times as well and get along great with David.

# ? Mar 24, 2024 23:20

MagusofStars: Mar 31, 2012

I just like that he showed her the extended edition. Even a lot of people who like the books/movies will admit that the extended edition kind of drags in spots. If he wanted to have any chance for her to enjoy it, you gotta go with the (relatively) more tightly paced theatrical release rather than the super long ones.

That said though, wife didn't need to be so Worst Movie Ever and call it meaningless poo poo, just go with a polite "yeah, not my cup of tea, felt a little long for my tastes" and leave it at that.

# ? Mar 24, 2024 23:24

duck trucker: Oct 14, 2017; YOSPOS

MagusofStars posted:

That said though, wife didn't need to be so Worst Movie Ever and call it meaningless poo poo, just go with a polite "yeah, not my cup of tea, felt a little long for my tastes" and leave it at that.

"But you don't have the full context of the whole trilogy. Now we'll watch the two towers extended edition."

# ? Mar 24, 2024 23:44

Farmer Crack-Ass: Jan 2, 2001; this is me posting irl

CharlestheHammer posted:

I assume people are treating it like that because they are taking the wife side despite the fact she is being kind of an rear end in a top hat about her spouses favorite movie.

Like she didn�t just say she didn�t like it but treating it as the worst thing ever. That�s got to sting

he dropped the extended edition on her. that movie is almost three and a half hours long and that's without the end credits. i, personally, would not push someone to watch a movie that long unless i felt it likely they would enjoy it. perhaps by them having expressed prior enjoyment of other movies with similar themes or aesthetics.

i'm guessing he either had zero idea whether or not she'd actually be inclined to like it, or he just blithely assumed she'd get into it because he thinks its the best thing ever. maybe i'm wrong.

was she a bit harsh? maybe. but i think this guy could be a bit more empathetic.

# ? Mar 24, 2024 23:56

Vim Fuego: Jun 1, 2000; Ultra Carp

duck trucker posted:

"But you don't have the full context of the whole trilogy. Now we'll watch the two towers extended edition."

He should play the audiobooks quietly while she's sleeping. She'll start to appreciate it eventually

# ? Mar 24, 2024 23:56

Hughlander: May 11, 2005

I messed up and I ruined my marriage

quote:

I'm not looking for pity or understanding here. I know I'm not getting it. Me and my ex-wife have a 14 month old son. After he was born our marriage fell apart. She said I wasn't pulling my weight with childcare and chores but at the same time she expected me to know what to do without her telling me. It was bad. We argued a lot and I ended up telling her that her life would be harder without me. She got really quiet and I thought that was the end of the argument. It made things fall apart and we are getting divorced. We're living separately, each got a new apartment. As for our son the law in our state [Kentucky] is that 50/50 is the default for custody. It is automatic unless one parent proves neglect on the part of the other. We don't have that so on the advice of both our lawyers we are splitting time and doing alternating weeks since we separated. We usually switch on Mondays with the daycare pickup and drop off.

I knew being a single parent wasn't easy but I didn't really know until now. This is where I realize how badly I hosed up because I'm drowning. The weeks I have my son I don't get anything done and I can barely even function at work because I'm so exhausted. I spend the whole week I don't have him catching up and I can't even get everything done. My apartment is a mess and I can hardly keep up with errands and chores. It sucks. I realize I hosed up because I thought since I was having a hard time my wife would be too and we could call off the divorce and work on things. But she doesn't want to. She says her life is easier without me and she is the opposite of me and can apparently keep up everything fine. She says she isn't exhausted anymore and realized it's easier having one person to take care of instead of 2.

I know I messed up and should have been a better husband. I can't even ask for less time with my son because I can't afford the child support. Right now neither of us has any because of 50/50 and equal income but if we go off 50/50 my lawyer says the person with less time will get child support. I hate myself for loving up so much. Obviously this is a throwaway. Wtf did I do?

This warms my heart so much, I love the genre of the fail-man who couldn't help because he wasn't told exactly what to do. And the wife who won't get back together because her workload is literally 1/2 of what it was before.

# ? Mar 25, 2024 00:11

CharlestheHammer: Jun 26, 2011; YOU SAY MY POSTS ARE THE RAVINGS OF THE DUMBEST PERSON ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH BUT YOU YOURSELF ARE READING THEM. CURIOUS!

Farmer Crack-rear end posted:

he dropped the extended edition on her. that movie is almost three and a half hours long and that's without the end credits. i, personally, would not push someone to watch a movie that long unless i felt it likely they would enjoy it. perhaps by them having expressed prior enjoyment of other movies with similar themes or aesthetics.

i'm guessing he either had zero idea whether or not she'd actually be inclined to like it, or he just blithely assumed she'd get into it because he thinks its the best thing ever. maybe i'm wrong.

was she a bit harsh? maybe. but i think this guy could be a bit more empathetic.

At this point we are making assumptions about this guy that doesn�t really have anything in story to justify it. He is a superfan that much is true but there isn�t anything to suggest he wasn�t sincerely trying to get his wife into something he loved

# ? Mar 25, 2024 00:17

DemoneeHo: Nov 9, 2017; Come on hee-ho, just give us 300 more macca

Mx. posted:

My (26f) friend (26f) has accused me of stealing her boyfriend. Boyfriend (25m) had no idea they were dating

OP posted an update. Surprise, Carly was being delusional:

quote:

UPDATE:

Well, I met up with Carly. They're not dating and never were so Matt isn't a cheater.

I met up with Carly this morning at a coffee shop in our home town. She wasn't happy to be there but I'm over her feelings after the past week I've had. I sat her down and asked her to give me her side of the story. I told her exactly what Matt had said to me and asked for her to explain everything.

- Carly met Matt last year, not long before I moved back to the state. A mutual friend in the building they both work in invited Matt to after work drinks and that's when they met.

- Carly thought he was cute and started flirting with him.

Side bar: Matt is awful at picking up flirting cues. It took weeks of me flirting with him until he realised and asked me out. This is something I always find amusing because Matt himself is really outgoing with a lot of charisma.

- No, they never spent any time alone together apart from the odd run to a coffee shop near their building to grab lunch.

- I went through Carly's phone and there are no messages from Matt apart from ones in their group chat.

- They haven't kissed or slept together. Carly has never been to Matt's apartment and Matt has never been to Carly's apartment.

I asked her why she thought he was her boyfriend. This is a direct quote:

"Ok so we're not officially boyfriend and girlfriend yet but I was sure he was going to ask me really soon. He's always smiling at me and making jokes. I know he was going to ask me out, just the two of us."

I basically said "Carly, that's not him flirting with you. That's just Matt. He's a friendly guy! I'm sorry but he and I have been seeing each other for a while now so it's not going to happen." I explained how we'd been taking it slow because of us both being so busy with studying and work so we've only just made it official.

As I said all this I could see Carly's elaborate fantasy crumble. I asked her to please set the record straight with her parents (for my parents sake) and with our mutual friends. Carly looked flustered but mumbled something that sounded like "Yeah, fine."

I said I was sorry for this misunderstanding and hopefully we could all put this behind us. On my drive to Matt's apartment I called him to relay everything. He was baffled by the whole thing but said he would message Carly. Once I got there he showed me the text:

"Hey Carly. Look, I'm sorry if I mislead you in any way with my actions, please know they have only ever been from a friendly place. I see us as friends but that's all. I hope we can be friends in the future once this has all blown over but if you're not comfortable with that then I respect it. All the best, Matt"

Carly hasn't responded yet and I don't know if she will. Hopefully she will set the record straight with everyone, I'm washing my hands of this mess and focusing on my relationship with Matt and my studies!

Maybe try asking him out on a date next time instead of just imagining it?

Hughlander posted:

I messed up and I ruined my marriage

This warms my heart so much, I love the genre of the fail-man who couldn't help because he wasn't told exactly what to do. And the wife who won't get back together because her workload is literally 1/2 of what it was before.

His ex halved her workload, and he doubled his, lol

# ? Mar 25, 2024 00:45

Troublemaker: Mar 12, 2007

cwinkle posted:

It was call Hush. They moved to some horse farm in Kentucky or somewhere. The mother was Jessica Lange. It was a terrible movie I saw in the theater because the poster and trailer made it out that Paltrow was going to be naked a lot. She wasn't.

Yes, that's the one, thanks!

It sounds like you were at the same stage my 11-year-old is right now. We can only get him to sit down and watch a movie with us if we tell him that there might be boobies in it.

# ? Mar 25, 2024 01:21

trickybiscuits: Jan 13, 2008; yospos

DemoneeHo posted:

His ex halved her workload, and he doubled his, lol

The double of zero is still zero so he made things even worse for himself than that, lol

r/BestofRedditorUpdates has updates, which can be immensely satisfying

My Husband Almost Killed Our Baby and My Toddler Saved Him

quote:

Hey Reddit, I need to share this story because I'm still shaking from what happened. I'm 25F, been with my husband (30M) since 2018. We have a three-year-old girl and a newborn boy. But tonight, things almost took a turn for the worse.

My husband has always had trouble paying attention, but I never thought it would come to this. Our neighborhood is weirdly laid out, with cars zooming by at crazy speeds at all hours off the day I was folding clothes when I heard our toddler screaming, "Dad, help!"

That tone made me drop everything and sprint outside. What I saw made my blood run cold � our newborn in his stroller, careening towards the busy street. I screamed and ran to him barely stopping the stroller in time. My baby girls hands and knees were scratched up because she tripped trying to run after the stroller.

I snatched up my baby, heart pounding, and scanned for my husband. He wasn't watching � he was chatting with neighbors, completely oblivious. The anger I felt was unlike anything I've ever experienced. I stormed up to him, shouting in disbelief.

He looked shocked at first, then realized what almost happened. The apologies and tears came pouring out, but it was too late. I couldn't wrap my head around how he could be so careless, so blind to our toddler's screams and the stroller rolling away.

I packed up the kids and left, staying with my parents. They're on my side, but my husband keeps texting, begging forgiveness, calling it an honest mistake. But I can't shake the terror of almost losing my baby because he couldn't focus for a single second my baby girl got hurt in the process because he couldn�t pay attention. I almost lost my son because he couldn�t pay attention. I can�t stop crying. I feel so guilty. I wish this all never happened.

Sorry it�s short I just want to hold my babies and I can�t stop shaking every time I think about it. What if I was just one second late would I have been planning a funeral?.

And the reason I left the house instead of him was because I hate that house I don�t feel like it safe for the kids with all the traffic and I was right It�s my husband�s work house. I can�t be running either. I had a C-section less six weeks ago

A lot of people are saying why wasn�t I watching the kids I was doing their laundry like a parent. Does he takes them for walks to have bonding time with them. He literally created this by himself This has never happened before how was I supposed to know and people saying why didn�t I get him checked out? I�m NOT his mother he is 30 years old, I�m sick of people acting like I have to parent my own husband while I literally have a newborn a toddler and I�m still healing from a C-section that I teared my stitches from when I ran to get my baby I don�t care if it was his ADHD, the court wouldn�t care either. If he killed my child, he would�ve went to prison, either way.

quote:
Hi love, let me just clear it up for you so I was sitting inside in the lounge room and there�s a huge window behind the TV that was a little open so I could hear outside that�s when I heard my toddler scream for her dad to help when I was outside he was standing on the neighbours driveway. I assume that he must�ve had left the baby literally on the road because there was no possible way that it would�ve rolled off like that, and my toddler was playing with the neighbours cat before she noticed her brother was rolling away when I confronted him about it. He tried to explain but he just kept stuttering I still don�t know what exactly happened. I don�t know if he didn�t put the brakes on the stroller. If the wind blew him away, I just don�t know. My neighbour contacted me and had asked if I wanted the security footage because his wife is 100% on my side so I�ll probably find out once it gets sent to me

quote:

Update.

The neighbours wife sent me the footage, and I really can�t just wrap my head around it, so my husband was walking with the stroller and my toddler was in front of them when they passed the neighbours house. My neighbour was outside, washing his car, and my toddler saw his pet cat and stopped to go pet it, so my husband. Stopped. LEFT MY BABY ON THE ROAD he didn�t even bother locking the wheels and walked all the way up the driveway not even bothering looking back at the baby he had his back face to him for about five minutes before the stroller just suddenly started moving. I think it�s because the road is on a hill kinda or it could�ve been the wind. My toddler never went near the stroller.It couldn�t been her. The stroller went down the road and my toddler. That�s when she started screaming and running for it when she saw. It the neighbour started running after my daughter when she tripped, he tried to pick her up that�s when the neighbours wife�s car comes into frame and she stops and starts running back to the way the stroller is coming after that you can�t really see anything because it�s all out of frame, but you can hear all the commotion my husband just stood there the whole time hand on his head with a blank stare on his face he didn�t even do anything when our toddler was crying from hurting herself he only started crying when I confronted him.

What do I do I genuinely do not know what to do. i�m panicking. this was never the life I wanted for my kids. I don�t understand why he was in standing there. I have not even gotten a text or a call from him since I got sent the video it�s just been silent I just can�t get the sound of my daughters screams. That�s the sound that no mother wants to hear. I can�t explain in the moment, but it felt like my blood went cold. and I just felt pure fear I never wanna watch the footage again.

# ? Mar 25, 2024 01:35

Enemabag Jones: Mar 24, 2015

I don't even burn the energy needed to grab the remote unless I know someone's hangin dong.

# ? Mar 25, 2024 01:38

Shifty Pony: Dec 28, 2004; Up ta somethin'

Shanghaied posted:

AITA for not driving my wife around?

I really loving hope this guy doesn't let his wife teach his daughter to drive.

# ? Mar 25, 2024 01:45

ChickenOfTomorrow: Nov 11, 2012; god damn it, you've got to be kind

a transcriptionist has just shared this and i'm not sure, but I'm getting "historical Poop Knife"

# ? Mar 25, 2024 01:47

Mustang: Jun 18, 2006; “We don’t really know where this goes — and I’m not sure we really care.”

trickybiscuits posted:

The double of zero is still zero so he made things even worse for himself than that, lol

r/BestofRedditorUpdates has updates, which can be immensely satisfying

My Husband Almost Killed Our Baby and My Toddler Saved Him

It's stupefying how many people that have no business ever having kids somehow end up with kids.

# ? Mar 25, 2024 01:51

trickybiscuits: Jan 13, 2008; yospos

My husband doesn�t know that I know what he�s up to (sounds bad, ends sweet)

quote:

My (33f) husband (34m) and I had our first baby back in June of last year. My husband�s aunt gifted our son a lovely chunky knitted blanket. The blanket is so soft and I have made multiple comments about how I would like to find a full size blanket just like it because it is so cozy and I�m kind of jealous of my baby.

Well, this past weekend my husband snuck off to the store. He refused to tell me where he was going and why, but I later found a plastic bag with the logo of a local crafting store. That evening, DH stated that he would like to have an hour of alone time every night after our son goes to sleep. He stressed that he would not like to be disturbed, but if I needed him then I could call/text him. I agreed to this because we are both adjusting to have very little �me� time since the birth of our son.

Last night, during his alone time our son started crying. I checked the baby monitor and saw that he had simply lost his pacifier and was going back to sleep. However, the baby monitor also shows part of our son�s room, not just his crib. In the corner of his room I saw my husband sitting on the floor with a bunch of chunky yarn in front of him. I turned the volume up and heard that he was watching a YouTube video on how to finger knit. This sweet man is making me a blanket.

He absolutely loves surprising me but is terrible at keeping secrets. I just know that he is going to slip up and accidentally mention something about the blanket at some point. I plan on acting clueless so that I will still be surprised when he gives it to me. I just love him so much and I�m so delighted that he�s learning a new skill so I can have a custom blanket.

quote:

Brief backstory: I posted recently about how I checked the baby monitor while my son was sleeping and saw my husband sitting on the floor of my son�s room finger knitting a blanket for me after I made a comment on how I wanted a chunky blanket.

My sweet husband broke. He kept on mentioning that he was working on a surprise for me. I would occasionally ask what this mysterious project was and he would get a cheeky smile and say �I can�t tell you!� That eventually evolved into him repeatedly telling me that keeping the surprise was really hard and he wanted to just tell me. I kept saying �no! You�ve kept it a surprise for this long, you can keep going!� But one day after dinner he decided he couldn�t keep it in anymore. He showed it to me. It was only about 1/4 done, but it was lovely. The yarn was really soft and was my favorite color. I could tell he had taken his time because of the consistency of all the loops. Even unfinished it was perfect.

He told me that he kept moving it around to different hiding spots, but since our house is very small it was only a matter of time before I accidentally found it. He said he had run out of yarn and asked if I wanted to pick out another color to add to it. I said yes and we made a little date out of it. We grabbed lunch and then walked around the craft store before I picked out a complimentary color to the one he chose.

He hasn�t had much time to work on it the last few days, but he assured me it will be finished by my birthday. I�ll post a picture of the blanket when it�s finished. For now, I am wildly impressed with how long he kept it a secret and I�m so excited to have my first ever handmade blanket.

# ? Mar 25, 2024 01:53

John Wick of Dogs: Mar 4, 2017; A real hellraiser

trickybiscuits posted:

The double of zero is still zero so he made things even worse for himself than that, lol

r/BestofRedditorUpdates has updates, which can be immensely satisfying

My Husband Almost Killed Our Baby and My Toddler Saved Him

This sorry is so weird I honestly cannot parse exactly what is happening and what is the timeline. The carriage moves on its own. The girl runs after it and trips and no one notices but the mom has heard it, and she is able to leave the house and run next door in time to stop the carriage... That seems like a really long amount of time between an imminent scream of danger and safely stopping the thing

# ? Mar 25, 2024 01:54

Midnight Voyager: Jul 2, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

The thing suddenly starting to move makes sense if you realize there's a baby in the stroller who can wiggle, causing a precariously parked stroller to start moving.

# ? Mar 25, 2024 01:56

Elissimpark: May 20, 2010; Bring me the head of Auguste Escoffier.

Enemabag Jones posted:

I don't even burn the energy needed to grab the remote unless I know someone's hangin dong.

Sitting through the complete works of Peter Greenaway because dongs and tits are guaranteed.

# ? Mar 25, 2024 01:57

Kurieg: Jul 19, 2012; RIP Lutri: 5/19/20-4/2/20

John Wick of Dogs posted:

This sorry is so weird I honestly cannot parse exactly what is happening and what is the timeline. The carriage moves on its own. The girl runs after it and trips and no one notices but the mom has heard it, and she is able to leave the house and run next door in time to stop the carriage... That seems like a really long amount of time between an imminent scream of danger and safely stopping the thing

Toddler sees cat to pet and goes to pet a cat
Dad takes this as an opportunity to talk to the neighbor, leaving the baby in the stroller on the street.
Stroller starts rolling, probably because the baby is antsy being left on it's own in a stroller, or just being a baby.
Toddler notices and tries to stop it, screams for his dad to help.
Dad just kinda goes "aw shucks" and stands there as if there's nothing he could possibly do while his post-c-section wife runs out of her house to save the baby.

# ? Mar 25, 2024 02:05

John Wick of Dogs: Mar 4, 2017; A real hellraiser

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=id6GVHcTZ18

Found video of the baby stroller incident

# ? Mar 25, 2024 02:05

remembertorelax: Aug 16, 2023

trickybiscuits posted:

My Husband Almost Killed Our Baby and My Toddler Saved Him

One of the most bizarre situations for a married parent must be the realization that your spouse is somehow a dangerously bad caretaker, but not in a way that would guarantee you to get full custody. In an extreme case, it seems like your choices are "kidnap" the kids and try to disappear, or stick it out because staying married gives you the best chance to watch and protect the kids.

# ? Mar 25, 2024 02:12

Catalina: May 20, 2008

Oh no.

The OP to this thread doesn�t link to the post that provides context, anymore.

# ? Mar 25, 2024 02:14

Captain Hygiene: Sep 17, 2007; You mess with the crabbo...

ChickenOfTomorrow posted:

a transcriptionist has just shared this and i'm not sure, but I'm getting "historical Poop Knife"

AND a toothpick nail cleaner? They really knew how to make things back in the day.

# ? Mar 25, 2024 02:18

mystes: May 31, 2006

ChickenOfTomorrow posted:

a transcriptionist has just shared this and i'm not sure, but I'm getting "historical Poop Knife"

This is total speculation, but I'm guessing toilet is being used in the sense of stuff you do to take care of your appearance or whatever and not in the sense of something you poop into and it just means "razor" or something

# ? Mar 25, 2024 02:18

Quackles: Aug 11, 2018; Pixels of Light.

ChickenOfTomorrow posted:

a transcriptionist has just shared this and i'm not sure, but I'm getting "historical Poop Knife"

quote:

BIG OFFER.� In order to introduce
our new goods and secure future trade
we will, on receipt of 15 cents in
stamps, send you FREE, by mail, this
Elegant TOILET KNIFE. It has a blade
of tempered steel, tooth-pick nail cleaner
and toilet blade.
Address, WESSON MANUF'G CO.,
Providence, R.I.

# ? Mar 25, 2024 02:20

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 29, 2024 18:38

TengenNewsEditor: Apr 3, 2004

John Wick of Dogs posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=id6GVHcTZ18

Found video of the baby stroller incident

this is where montage comes from

# ? Mar 25, 2024 02:25

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

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