r/relationships: SPRAYING A FRAGRANCE ON MY PENIS

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: SPRAYING A FRAGRANCE ON MY PENIS

redshirt: Aug 11, 2007

My BIL is this hard core fisher (not a pro) and it's actually impressive how good he is. We we're having breakfast at this place near a stream entering into a lake, and after breakfast he goes to his truck and gets his pole and has this huge fish on the hook in minutes. I watched in awe.

# ? May 5, 2024 20:09

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# ? Jun 1, 2024 18:46

artsy fartsy: May 10, 2014; You'll be ahead instead of behind. Hello!

Please join me in gawking at this lunatic

AITA for inviting my kids and grandkids to a family event

quote:

Later this week, my father-in-law is hosting a birthday party for himself at his house. He's turning 85 years old, which I feel is a momentous occasion, and 16 people are already confirmed to be invited, so I thought it would be fine if I invited my kids and grandkids as well. The more the merrier, right?

Well, it's 10 additional people in all (three kids, their spouses, and four grandkids), and when I revealed that I had already invited them, I expected my sister-in-law, who's organizing the party, to be excited. Instead, she got furious at me. She said that they had only planned for 16 of us to come and that inviting so many people "at the last minute" would require too much more planning (additional food, more seating, etc.). But here's the kicker: my sister-in-law expected ME to cook all of this additional food and make a big cake. As the person planning the party, I think that she should be the one responsible for this, especially since it was such a massive oversight on her part not to invite so many of my family members in the first place.

Well, I told her this on the phone, and she went off on me. She said that I had been "extremely selfish" and that someone who's turning 85 years old would be "overwhelmed" with so many houseguests. He's already going to have a big party. Why would 10 more people, four of whom are kids who will just run around and play by themselves the whole time, make a big difference? I did my best to bite my tongue and listen to her concerns, but it was difficult. I feel like she has no compassion at all for me sometimes, and I think the real root cause of her anger is that she simply doesn't like my family.

I now have a choice to make. I can either buy a whole bunch of food and prepare it with only a few days' notice or uninvite everyone. This seems incredibly unfair to me. I asked my husband what he thinks, and he said he "can see things from both sides," which is such a cop out it's unreal. I need him to back me up on this, but he refuses to do so. I just feel like I'm the only one with my head screwed on straight, and it sucks. I want my sister-in-law to stop being such a a bully and to see things from my perspective. The whole thing just depressed me and makes me angry. AITA?

ETA: All three of my biological children are from a previous marriage, so none of my kids are his grandkids, and none of their kids are his great-grandkids.

# ? May 5, 2024 20:46

mystes: May 31, 2006

artsy fartsy posted:

Please join me in gawking at this lunatic

AITA for inviting my kids and grandkids to a family event

How could anyone possibly think it's okay to invite 10 extra people to someone else's event that only is supposed to have 16 people attending without asking lol

Even if the party had 50 people attending and you were just bringing 1 extra person you should still ask if you weren't explicitly told it was okay to bring a plus one

mystes fucked around with this message at 20:58 on May 5, 2024

# ? May 5, 2024 20:56

Wicked Them Beats: Apr 1, 2007; Moralists don't really *have* beliefs. Sometimes they stumble on one, like on a child's toy left on the carpet. The toy must be put away immediately. And the child reprimanded.

That edit at the end is amazing. She's not just inviting more people, she's inviting practical strangers. Should invite some of her coworkers while she's at it.

# ? May 5, 2024 20:59

FMguru: Sep 10, 2003; peed on;
sexually

artsy fartsy posted:

Please join me in gawking at this lunatic

AITA for inviting my kids and grandkids to a family event

LMAO at the husband for just putting his head down and letting his wife twist in the wind. He's still an rear end in a top hat for not putting his foot down, and for marrying her in the first place.

# ? May 5, 2024 21:00

Most Power Alex: Sep 2, 2023

artsy fartsy posted:

Please join me in gawking at this lunatic

AITA for inviting my kids and grandkids to a family event

I was not ready for that ending reveal.

# ? May 5, 2024 21:30

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

The real assholes are her kids, for not taking on their step-father's DNA. This all could have been avoided if they had simply biologically merged into the new family to begin with.

# ? May 5, 2024 21:37

Midnight Voyager: Jul 2, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

Sekenr posted:

Yeah. Super weird. Who gives a 20 something year old a silver and rubies triptich depicting st. Dracula slaying a dragon

Now that you describe it like that, it would have been a loving perfect gift for me at that age (and for now!) for other reasons.

# ? May 5, 2024 21:45

Troublemaker: Mar 12, 2007

This one is long with all the updates, but it's a nice Bridezilla/Hand That Feeds story.

WIBTA for cancelling my brother�s wedding.

quote:

Trigger Warnings: possible bigotry, entitlement, financial exploitation, verbal abuse of children, manipulation

RECAP

Original Post: February 25, 2024

I, f31, have a brother, M28, who is hoping to get married to his fianc�, F25. They have been in a relationship for a long time, have kids and a house together, so she isn't someone who's new to the family.

We're all European, but I own a gorgeous house in Colorado, it is in the middle of the mountains, surrounded by forests, has huge windows looking out on my acres surrounding;... It truly is stunning and a dream come true. A couple of months ago my brother came to me and asked me if they could use my house for a destination wedding. While I was hestitant to host a god drat wedding in the house of my dreams, I can absolutely understand how my dreamhome is her dream venue. I told him they absolutely could, but had some rules (despite me not living there).

No more than 25 guests. It truly is in the middle of nowhere so guests would have to sleep at the house and I simply do not have room for more.

Nothing that permanently alters anything in or around the house.

No smoking indoors

Any damage done by them or the!r guests would have to be paid for.

Since i'm quite protective of the house I offered to decorate and find a caterer, and that 'd be my gift to them. So, i'm providing them with a venue, food and decorations. I am currently almost 10k into my ''gift'', because it's my brothers wedding and it's what I wanted to do.

Now, poo poo has hit the fan. His fianc� decided she needed at least 45 guests. While I was willing to be flexible by one or two, but 20? Nah. I asked her if she wanted to stack them and she got salty. On top of that she wants me to pay to fly her family in, because I fronted the money to my other brother (he is paying me back) because he couldn't afford a ticket. I told her no, and again I got sassed. On top of that she wants me to build a pergola (which I actually considered), paint my livingroom (cover up the beautiful wood, so gently caress no) and also pay for the drinks.

I said no, i've done enough. She has now taken it upon herself to tell people i'm coming back on my promises, that I left her hanging, that she can't afford the super expensive wedding I ''made'' her plan and even went as far as to uninvite my grandparents, just to spite me (her word were ''you wanted me to cut back on guests so i'm picking your family) . I'm getting at least two messages a day asking me why i'm ruining her day, if i'm jealous,...

Today, she called me to tell me that if I keep going out of my way to make her miserable, I and my ''rescues'' (two of my children are adopted) would not be invited either. While I find it absurd that she thinks she can uninvite me from my own house, the fact that she referred to my kids as ''rescues'' has me absolutely fuming.

I am considering cancelling the whole thing, but but be royally loving over my brother in the process, who has done nothing wrong. So, is her shitshow overschadowing my need to protect my brother from a giant financial hole? I don't know.

EDIT TO ADD: I do not live in CO. We all live in our home country in Europe.

Edit 2; my brothers age had a typo.

WIBTA?

RELEVANT COMMENTS/ADDITIONAL INFO

OOP when questioned on the 2nd house repeatedly

I purchased this house after it had been on the market for close to two (2) years, it was in complete disrepair and I spent a little over a year of my life restoring (not renovating) it to it's original, glorious state. I have spent a lot of money, love and time on this house and had anyone wanted it, it would have been purchased somewhere in the TWO years it was on the market.

By that logic, should I no longer buy that last block of cheese at the supermarket because someone else might want it? Not park anywhere because someone else could want to park there?

I might move into this home, I might not.

Also, happy to see you're getting your cardio in jumping to conclusions! The house is currently being used by a friend who needs to get back on his feet, and has been for the past 8 months.

I work hard for what I have, and if I want to spend it having the home of my dreams just in case I someday want to live there, that's my choice.

VERDICT: NOT ENOUGH INFO

Relevant Comments

RMaua: INFO: Does your brother know that she is behaving this way? Have you spoken to him about this behaviour?

OOP: I have.

Almost everything goes through text message so I screengrab the outrageous nonsense. He claims the pressure of planning a wedding has gotten to her and that I should try and be patient.

OOP responds to a long comment on cancelling the venue and how large is OOP�s house and if it could accommodate 25 guests or not

Redditor Comment

OOP:

how big is this house that you can accomodate up to 25 guests overnight?

It is decently big, the sleeping arrangements wouldn't be luxurious though, think a combination of sleeping on couches, blow up matresses and sharing beds. Not ideal, but it would 've worked for one or two nights.

Update #1: February 29, 2024

quote:

Heya all! As an update was requested a decent amount of times, here I am letting you guys know how it all went.

First, I do want to address one thing;

To those claiming I am an rear end in a top hat because I am contributing to the housing-crisis by owning a house I don't live in. I am not. This is a house so deep in the mountains I need to drive 50 minutes to go do groceries, the internet is so crappy I am waiting for even starlink to start covering the area and when it snows, you sure as poo poo aren't going anywhere. This is not a house built for living in fulltime. On top of that it was on the market for close to two years and in complete disrepair. I did not ''steal'' some familys home, no one wanted it. The fact that it is a dream home is because I spent a year of my life restoring the whole thing myself.

Now, on to the update; I heard they were visiting my parents and I drove down as well, mostly because I wanted people present to witness the conversation.

I told her and my brother that since my home did not suit her needs and it was stressing her out to the point that she was calling my children names I no longer felt like I was giving them the appropriate gift by supplying a venue, caterer and decorations. I said that I felt like in my efforts to protect my home, I was limiting their options too much, standing in the way of their dream wedding and as a result would no longer be hosting. My brother seemed relieved, admitted to not quite wanting a destination wedding and that things got a little out of hand during the planning fase, thanked me for my willingness to help and offered to pay me back for the deposits i'm losing, which I appreciated but declined.

His SO, however, accused me of being petty and jealous because ''i'm single and no one wants me'' and going out of my way to cause her stress and ruin her day. She than pointed at my two youngest children and said ''You're doing more for strangers than you are your own family''.

The kids are luckily young enough so they didn't catch on to this, but my older two did and were absolutely shocked, so were my parents. I told her she had all of three seconds to get out of my line of sight before I would be bringing hellfire down on her, while instructing my children to leave the room. My father stepped in, said it would indeed be better for her to leave and told my brother that he was sorry, but that this is unacceptable. My brother agreed, took his family home and has since called me to apologise and to say that the wedding planning has been put on hold until she ''comes to her senses''.

So, thanks for the input and help all, i'm happy it didn't end up all too dramatic.

----NEW UPDATE----

quote:

Bridezillas post-wedding, how to proceed?: April 28, 2024 (2 months later)

Hi all!

I have a bit of a need for advice, but in order to get there, backstory & context are necessary. It might turn out to be quite the read.

It all started roughly a year ago when my brother (Nick) and his fiance (Amy) started planning their wedding. They both approached me and asked me if they could use my property in CO, US as a venue for their destinationwedding. (We are European and live in Europe.)

I happily agreed, but had some stipulations as I absolutely adore this home and have spent an unreasonable amount of time and money restoring it, myself.

The rules were as followed;

� No more than 25 guests, in total. My reasoning for this was that given that the nearest town/hotel is 50 minutes away, people would be spending the night at my house. (This was per Amy's wishes). Not only was there no physical space, that many people would already be an absolute disaster for my septic system. � No permanent altering of anything in or around the property. This because it's my property, that I work hard on/for and I decided so. � Because of my protectiveness of the property I picked/made/paid for caterers and decor, in order to ensure no damage.

The happy couple agreed and planning proceeded. As the day drew closer I was contacted by the bride with the following demands;

� She "needed" 45 guests, not 25. � She wanted me to paint the (freshly restored, mind you) beautiful oak white, so it would be more "weddingy". � She wanted me to pay for her family to fly in as I was loaning my other brother the money to do so.

I refused, words were had (for example; she called my adopted children "rescues", I took back my offer and cancelled all I had booked and my brother "postponed" the wedding.

Well, the wedding was yesterday and to my suprise myself and all of my children were invited. I, at first, declined but was eventually mellowed down by the fact that it was my little brothers big day.

I went last minute shopping so we would be able to adhere to the dresscode and even texted the bride photos of the outfits "is this ok". She was very civil, very polite and even seemed grateful that we would show up after all.

The wedding starts, my brother, his wife and their children all look extremely happy and beautiful. It was a beautiful wedding and I began to think that all the dust had settled.

Untill this morning. I woke up to a text message from Amy, explaining that she and my brother were both very dissapointed that I hadn't gifted them the amount in cash that I would have spent on decor & food had the wedding been in my house.

I am yet to respond. Frankly, i'm hurt because I thought they were reaching out to repair our relationship. In stead they just wanted me to gift roughly 10 times of what I gifted them, despite me already losing out because of the deposits.

So, I am considering NC and completely walking away. I would miss my niblings immensely and I dread the idea of deviding my family like that (as our parents and extended family would be forced to navigate around the whole issue, but at this point I am just so hurt and angry.

So, to those of you whose relationships survived the whole bridezilla-saga, what did you do? How did you do it? Was it worth it?

Update, a day later.

As many of you suggested I contacted my brother and, in the midst of smalltalk, asked him if he was pleased with my gift. He expressed being suprised with the fact they still got one, given tge fact that I had already "lost" money ib the deposits.

When I tell you my blood boiled! Now, I have never, in my life, done something petty. (Recovering people-pleaser here) but in that moment I decided to return the assholery in kind family dynamics be damned.

First of all, I told my brother. He apologised and told me to ignore it, I told him I would not be doing that. He said "well, I can't stop you" and said he'd never take away my spot in my niblings life.

So, I screengrabbed everything and and took it to social media. I tagged her, my brother, our parents, her siblings and parents and went on this incredibly passive agressive, childish rant on how I wanted to "avoid misunderstandings within my social and family circle" and how "sorry" I was my efforts weren't to the brides liking.

My post went up about 3 hours ago and the only message i've opened so far is my brothers, stating (roughly translated) "woke up and chose violence huh". He doesn't seem to care.

I will be going NC with my SIL for the forseeable future and am now 100% done with this nonsense. Thanks for the advice, all!

# ? May 5, 2024 21:51

S40CheckingAccount: Jan 14, 2024

make your house "more weddingy".

# ? May 5, 2024 22:09

Runcible Cat: May 28, 2007; Ignoring this post

r/relationships: woke up and chose violence

# ? May 5, 2024 22:12

FMguru: Sep 10, 2003; peed on;
sexually

How dare you not allow me to cover your beautiful restored oak walls with white house paint?!? Can't you see how the dark wood completely clashes with my wedding aesthetic?

# ? May 5, 2024 22:13

FMguru: Sep 10, 2003; peed on;
sexually

This story is pretty good, especially for the AH trying to recover by playing the ol' "heh, that was actually a test" card - I just wanted to highlight the second paragraph which instantly made my bones crumble to dust.

AITA for giving my ex fiancee a fake engagement ring.

quote:

It was an honest to God marriage proposal. I very much wanted to marry her. She is just a klutz and I didn't trust her with the real thing.

I took her to Coachella for the second weekend and to propose. It was a great time and she got to see No Doubt who she loves because her dad used to listen with her when she was a baby.

quote:

Anyway I asked her to marry me and she said yes. She loved the ring. I had had it sized but it was the brass and moisonite copy I had made so she would not lose or damage the real one at the concert.

Which she promptly did. And then she pretended not to. She said it was too tight and that she had put it away until we got back to Phoenix.

When we got back she asked me where I got the ring. I told her and she tried to replace it. Until they told her how much it cost.

She came to my place crying to tell me she lost the ring and to beg my forgiveness. I told her right away that it was bo big deal because I had the real one with me and we could go get it sized perfectly so she wouldn't loose it.

My mistake because she effing lost it. She went off on me for making her not enjoy the weekend because she was worried sick that she had lost her ring.

If she had told me she lost it I would have told her the truth. That I didn't want to take any chances with her ring at that massive venue.

She screamed at me that I was a complete rear end in a top hat to make her worry like that. She said a lot of stuff that I guess had been building for a while and she said things she could not take back.

I told her to get out. She asked for her real ring.insaid nope. I am not marrying someone who thinks this is the way to behave towards me.

I told her she had to leave or I would get the security guys to get her out. She is only signed in as a guest so it is not a big deal for me to get her out.

I feel like I dodged a bullet but also kind of bad that I didn't tell her at the concert that it was fake so she wouldn't worry.

My parents are wondering why we broke up and I don't really know what to say.

UPDATE on my ex fiancee and the fake engagement ring.

quote:

It was a test. And apparently I failed. She didn't lose the ring. She took it to get it appraised and found out it was fake. I guess her plan was to get me to apologize, then rush out and replace it. When I told her I had the real ring safe and ready to go she freaked out.

I have spoken with friends and they all agree that the people saying that I should not have picked a place she loves, at an event she loves, and that we could return to every year on the anniversary of the proposal, are idiots. I showed them the post and they agree that there is a market for a safe room for people who are afraid to propose anywhere meaningful could do so.

I'm still happy that I found out how mercurial she could be before we entered into a lifelong commitment.

There is nothing else to update. Thanks for the advice and alternative views on my situation.

# ? May 5, 2024 22:19

Baronjutter: Dec 31, 2007; "Tiny Trains"

Why the gently caress did the brother still marry this piece of poo poo? He seems very reasonable in the whole saga, never defending his wife and fully understanding how insane she is. But he still married her?!? Zero pete energy.

# ? May 5, 2024 22:21

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

It seems the brother honestly believes that the behavior is both acceptable and only caused by the stress of planning a wedding. There will be no more stressful situations in the future.

# ? May 5, 2024 22:26

Hughlander: May 11, 2005

Runcible Cat posted:

r/relationships: woke up and chose violence

# ? May 5, 2024 22:31

mystes: May 31, 2006

FMguru posted:

This story is pretty good, especially for the AH trying to recover by playing the ol' "heh, that was actually a test" card - I just wanted to highlight the second paragraph which instantly made my bones crumble to dust.

AITA for giving my ex fiancee a fake engagement ring.

UPDATE on my ex fiancee and the fake engagement ring.

I was leaning towards NTA when the original story was posted because she apparently insisted on taking the ring, even though ideally I think OP should have talked with her and gotten her to agree that she should take a copy if she was prone to losing stuff, but based on the update I'm leaning more towards ESH

Basically both of them did something very similar by not trusting each other and if they just communicated normally none of this would have happened

(This is assuming the ex fiancee is telling the truth as evidenced by still having the ring.)

mystes fucked around with this message at 23:08 on May 5, 2024

# ? May 5, 2024 22:55

artsy fartsy: May 10, 2014; You'll be ahead instead of behind. Hello!

AITA for helping my landlord renovate his home to a rent decrease instead of going home and helping my wife?

quote:

My landlord "Chris" is a good buddy of mine. We also work together at our normal day job. His house is directly beside mine. We are both married and both have kids at home. His 6 kids range from 5 months old to 16. My 4 kids range from 7 months to 13. For the past month he has been trying to renovate his home and he asked me if I would help him and he would take $300 off our monthly rent bill until the work is done. It's an extensive remodel so the bathroom, kitchen, living room and 2 bedrooms are all getting redone. I agreed to it because $300 off rent means I can save more. My wife originally didn't have a problem with it.

Everyday except Sundays I have been getting off work at 4:30, coming home and seeing my wife and kids and then I head right over to Chris's house. When I get home I help where I can. However, about a week ago my wife started throwing jabs at me. Apparently she's looked out the window several times to find me "giggling like a school girl" with Chris's wife and has accused me of soaking up attention from another woman when she's right inside. I have reassured her that I don't want Chris's wife but that falls on deaf ears. So I just started playing it safe and whenever Chris's wife does talk to me (because she approaches me, not the other way around) I just won't make eye contact. It makes no difference to my wife due to the fact that since I'm working on renovations with Chris, I hang out with this woman far more than I do my wife. ONLY because his wife is right there. My wife could come over too and hang out but she won't because she doesn't trust their dog (giant pitbull who isn't trained very well and jumps on people).

Well, on Saturday Chris stepped out of the house for a bit to grill himself and his family dinner. He offered me a plate and I said sure. I went upstairs about an hour later and my wife handed me a plate of dinner and I said "no thanks, they gave me food". She looked wounded and threw my plate in the garbage and wouldn't speak to me for the rest of the night. I tried several times to speak to her but it was like talking to a wall. She wouldn't even look at me. Then last night I come home and she serves everyone dinner and there wasn't enough for me. She goes "oh, figured you'd eat with your family tonight" and walks away. I follow her and tell her she's being ridiculous and she says "no, what's loving ridiculous is I see you for an hour a night and take care of this house and the kids by myself 24/7 when you're down there playing family with your buddy and his bitch. I've seen you help Chris's wife more in the past month than you've helped me all year". She then went back to ignoring me. Which I do NOT understand because the only thing I have helped his wife with is grabbing a full trash bag from her and putting it in the bin or helping her move heavy objects. But when I woke up this morning, her and the kids were gone and so was a lot of their stuff. I texted my wife and asked where she was and she said "why does it matter? Doesn't your family need you? Quick, go run and get your $2.50 an hour and ego stroked by the bimbo next door so you can get $300 off rent". She still won't tell me where she is and now she's not responding to me at all. I'm very curious if I'm an AH for helping my landlord for a rent decrease instead of being upstairs with my wife from the moment I get home.

edit to clear up confusion: it's $300 off rent on the months that I am working on the renovations with him. Once renovations are complete, our rent will go back to the normal price. And as for my wife lacking in communication, a couple weeks back she had told me that she was feeling neglected. We talked it over and I told her it would only be another month or so and then everything would go back to normal. I felt there was a good understanding and that we were past it but she says that all it accomplished was me dismissing her and she claims that what she gathered from it was that I was basically saying "I understand how you feel but I'm still going to do what I want".

quote:

I get home around 4:30 and I stay down at Chris's until about 8pm. So, 3.5ish hours a day, 5-6 days a week.

quote:

When I'm home I'm a very active parent.

# ? May 5, 2024 23:12

Hughlander: May 11, 2005

artsy fartsy posted:

AITA for helping my landlord renovate his home to a rent decrease instead of going home and helping my wife?

Wonder when he'll realize he's working for $3.50 an hour or so

# ? May 5, 2024 23:19

Kenshin: Jan 10, 2007

artsy fartsy posted:

AITA for helping my landlord renovate his home to a rent decrease instead of going home and helping my wife?

He is getting ripped off hilariously here.

Less than $3.90/hr :lol:

Dude is ruining his relationship with his wife and neglecting both her and his kids for under $4/hour. Holy loving poo poo what an idiot

Kenshin fucked around with this message at 23:25 on May 5, 2024

# ? May 5, 2024 23:22

Wicked Them Beats: Apr 1, 2007; Moralists don't really *have* beliefs. Sometimes they stumble on one, like on a child's toy left on the carpet. The toy must be put away immediately. And the child reprimanded.

Sounds like the wife did the math and has probably laid it out for him multiple times, but the dude has the $300 figure in his head and has convinced himself it's a big number. And he really wants to believe the landlord taking advantage of him is a friend and not a parasite, so I doubt there's any use trying to talk sense to him.

# ? May 5, 2024 23:22

mystes: May 31, 2006

$300/month until the work is done? lmao

# ? May 5, 2024 23:24

artsy fartsy: May 10, 2014; You'll be ahead instead of behind. Hello!

Some redditor commented that it's not even about the money, it's about having an excuse to get out of responsibilities and I'm inclined to agree

# ? May 5, 2024 23:24

cat botherer: Jan 6, 2022; I am interested in most phases of data processing.

mystes posted:

Xun posted:
Why is a 2:2 grade at university, generally seen as poor?

Can someone translate this into American?

He got a Desmond.

# ? May 5, 2024 23:25

Most Power Alex: Sep 2, 2023

artsy fartsy posted:

AITA for helping my landlord renovate his home to a rent decrease instead of going home and helping my wife?

I was ready to declare the wife the rear end in a top hat until I realized he is neglecting his family for a job that pays a fraction of minimum wage.

# ? May 5, 2024 23:40

Red Rox: Aug 24, 2004; Motel Midnight off the hook

Baronjutter posted:

Why the gently caress did the brother still marry this piece of poo poo?

She is smoking hot

# ? May 5, 2024 23:41

Mr. Lobe: Feb 23, 2007; ... Dry bones...

Most Power Alex posted:

I was ready to declare the wife the rear end in a top hat until I realized he is neglecting his family for a job that pays a fraction of minimum wage.

And worse, for the benefit of a parasite

# ? May 5, 2024 23:44

Pigsfeet on Rye: Oct 22, 2008; I'm meat on the hoof

Sekenr posted:

Yeah. Super weird. Who gives a 20 something year old a silver and rubies triptich depicting st. Dracula slaying a dragon

You meant � St. George slashing a huge turd with a poop poleaxe�, right?

# ? May 6, 2024 00:10

Facebook Aunt: Oct 4, 2008; wiggle wiggle

Baronjutter posted:

Why the gently caress did the brother still marry this piece of poo poo? He seems very reasonable in the whole saga, never defending his wife and fully understanding how insane she is. But he still married her?!? Zero pete energy.

They already have kids. He's stuck with her in his life until those kids are grown. It's too late to walk away, might as well get married. :shrug:

Probably he was hoping this isn't who she really is, and once the wedding stress is over she'll go back to being the woman he fell in love with. Now that it's done he gets to find out if it was a stress induced break, or if the woman he loved was only a mask and now the mask is off.

# ? May 6, 2024 00:10

Hughlander: May 11, 2005

AITAH for finding a new wife after my wife gave me ultimatum to open our relationship, which was not an actual ultimatum??

quote:

My wife became obsessed with open relationship and when I refused to engage about it she gave me an ultimatum to open our relationship or we will get divorced. I told her to file for divorce. But I cooled down a bit afterwards. I decided that divorce is not right for me now. I had gained a bit of weight and I haven't dated in over a decade. I didn't even know where to loving start. I didn't think I could have handled dating and divorce at the same time.

So I agreed to an open marriage. It's been two years since then and I have worked myself and prepared myself for divorce. I have been dating a woman for one year now and I think she will be a good wife and good company for the kids.

We have decided to get married. I finally told my wife that I want to marry my girlfriend and I will be filling for divorce.

My wife is not happy about it, at first she said that we are already open so there is no need to leave. I explained to her that I don't want an open marriage I just want a simple life and my gf can give it to me.

She then asked why I agreed to open relationship and I told her that I just needed time to find a new wife before divorce. I just want to be married and live a normal life and I thought that it's better to find a woman first before divorcing. She was going to divorce me if I didn't agree so what was I even supposed to do.

She said she made that ultimatum in frustration and she never would have divorced me if I refused. What am I even supposed to do with this information now?

It's over. I think it's right decision for me to divorce and marry my gf

# ? May 6, 2024 00:23

FMguru: Sep 10, 2003; peed on;
sexually

Hughlander posted:

AITAH for finding a new wife after my wife gave me ultimatum to open our relationship, which was not an actual ultimatum??

She said she made that ultimatum in frustration and she never would have divorced me if I refused. What am I even supposed to do with this information now?

I will never get tired of people laying down an ultimatum and being blindsided when someone picks it up.

# ? May 6, 2024 00:30

Batterypowered7: Aug 8, 2009; The mist that chills you keeps me warm.

Hughlander posted:

AITAH for finding a new wife after my wife gave me ultimatum to open our relationship, which was not an actual ultimatum??

Lmao, just lmao

# ? May 6, 2024 00:30

JackSplater: Nov 20, 2014; Metal Coat? It's already active?!

Hughlander posted:

AITAH for finding a new wife after my wife gave me ultimatum to open our relationship, which was not an actual ultimatum??

"I gave you an ultimatum to make you agree with me! I totally wouldn't have gone through with it if you'd disagreed, but too late now!"

# ? May 6, 2024 01:49

big black turnout: Jan 13, 2009; Fallen Rib

Hughlander posted:

AITAH for finding a new wife after my wife gave me ultimatum to open our relationship, which was not an actual ultimatum??

ESH. Wife sucks for open relationship and ultimatum, but "being divorced isn't for me, I needed to find my next wife" guy also sucks majorly

# ? May 6, 2024 01:51

mom and dad fight a lot: Sep 21, 2006; Can't post for 28 days!

Hughlander posted:

AITAH for finding a new wife after my wife gave me ultimatum to open our relationship, which was not an actual ultimatum??

Redditor posted:

During the period of the open relationship have you been intimate with both your wife and your girlfriend?

Had you remained in the marital bed?

How old are your kids?

OP posted:

Yes,

Yes,

5, 11

lol, this guy's other replies make me think he might be a psychopath

# ? May 6, 2024 01:54

house of the dad: Jul 4, 2005

He's definitely a weird dude in general, which makes it funnier that his wife is somehow weirder and dumber than he is.

# ? May 6, 2024 01:57

reignonyourparade: Nov 15, 2012

Literally the exact chain of events we applaud in this thread all the time, this guy just planned on it going into it instead of making the exact same situation AFTER meeting and making the connection with the new partner

# ? May 6, 2024 02:27

Hughlander: May 11, 2005

mom and dad fight a lot posted:

lol, this guy's other replies make me think he might be a psychopath

Or on the spectrum at least. I didn�t get into the replies before posting.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? May 6, 2024 02:34

mystes: May 31, 2006

big black turnout posted:

ESH. Wife sucks for open relationship and ultimatum, but "being divorced isn't for me, I needed to find my next wife" guy also sucks majorly

I guess he was a little bit lovely because he mislead his wife about his intentions and planned to divorce once he found a girlfriend the whole time, but:
1) She made an ultimatum about opening the relationship which is really awful
2) He initially told her that he wanted to divorce her and only later changed his mind, so it's not like he didn't express any displeasure with it.
3) Until he expressed his intention to divorce her, he didn't do anything that she wasn't ok with since she wanted an open relationship anyway
4) Since she didn't actually intend to divorce him, it wasn't a situation where she didn't think she could stand being in the marriage unless it was opened, so the point of the ultimatum was just to coerce him into doing something she thought he wouldn't want to do, which I think is a lot worse than saying that she had changed and was only interested in open relationships so she would leave him unless he was also ok with that.

So I really have trouble blaming him. When it's like 90% the other person being lovely and 10% the OP being lovely in response I have trouble thinking of it as ESH.

mystes fucked around with this message at 02:43 on May 6, 2024

# ? May 6, 2024 02:40

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# ? Jun 1, 2024 18:46

ApplesandOranges: Jun 22, 2012; Thankee kindly.

Finding a wife is like finding a job, it�s easier if you already have one when looking for you next one.

# ? May 6, 2024 02:43

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: SPRAYING A FRAGRANCE ON MY PENIS

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